B•LOG

Ben Folds and Adam Duritz are brothers

2008-07-02T22:04:00.002-05:00

Do you think that Fred Jones from Fred Jones, Part 2 by Ben Folds is the same Mr. Jones that Adam Duritz sings about in the Counting Crows song, "Mr. Jones"? Dude, maybe Ben Folds and Adam Duritz are related. Wait. Maybe they're brothers. That has to be it. I mean, how many Mr. Jones' can there be?

Diana Bianchi - Who is she?

2008-07-02T22:00:00.001-05:00

The world wants to know who Diana Bianchi is. At least, that's what google thinks. This chick has skyrocketed to #16 on google trends right now. So, who is she? I've got no idea, but I'd sure hate to have her name. How many times did she get called Diana Bitchy in school? Sweet...

Follow-up: Accident during test drive

2008-07-02T21:55:00.002-05:00

So, here's the deal - follow up to my accident during test drive post - Apparently my insurance gets to pay for damage to the car I was driving and split the cost of the other car and the 'injury' with the car dealerships insurance.

Yeah, you read that right -- the 'injury'. Give me a break. An injury at less than 5MPH? Whatever. Ambulance chasers... I'm so pissed about that. What a crock of shit. Granted, it doesn't directly cost me anything, but that's what's wrong with this country right now. Everyone wants to whine about everything and try to sue people for everything. Take an advil. Walk it off.

Google AdSense only kind of works...

2008-06-30T22:52:00.001-05:00

So, on my page talking about hating walmart, there's a Google AdWords ad for Wal-Mart. I'd say it's safe to say that AdWords only partially works...

Accident During a Test Drive.

2008-06-30T22:25:00.003-05:00

I've only been in one accident in my driving years (11), and that one was not my fault. I was sitting at a stoplight when some kid hit me from behind. Well, that all changed today. Not only was I in an accident that could be my fault, but I was test driving a 2008 Honda Accord. What a f#*#&$ing mess.

See, there's construction in St. Louis. Like, they-shut-down-a-major-interstate construction. Seriously. Highway 64(40) is closed. Seriously. For like, 2 years. Anyone not from St. Louis has a hard time believing this is even possible. It is. Anyway, in the process, the on ramp to Hwy 270 North from Hwy 40 (the part that's open) is a mess. They added a stop sign, like that will fix it. Brilliant move. But I digress...

So, I'm heading towards said stop sign and there is a car in front of me. So, I stop. He's at the stop sign and somewhat rolls through it. I pull to the stop sign and watch him. He starts going (to merge onto 270). So, with him out of the way, I turn over my shoulder to look. Problem is, the sticker (you know, MSRP, etc) is right in my way. So I'm working real hard to see around the damn sticker. I think I see an opening, so I hit the gas and turn to look forward as I'm hitting the gas. Guess what - guy in front of me had apparently only pulled forward about 5 feet earlier, not actually merged like I thought. So, boom, I rear end him.

Which makes me wonder - why do they put those stickers on the left side. When you need to merge left, you can't see a damn thing. If they were on the right side of the vehicle, you'd be able to see around them much better. On the left, when you turn your head, the thing is right there, in the way.

Oh, how'd I like the Accord? Well, I'll just say that the interior is VERY nice (I was looking at the EX-L V6). The seats are the most uncomfortable thing in the world though. And the drive of the car is nothing beyond 'blah'. I think I'm going with the 2008 Nissan Altima 3.5SL. MUCH more fun to drive...

I also hate Diaper Genie (Review)

2008-06-27T22:12:00.002-05:00

Here it is, just one dad's review of the diaper genie....

Well, been the unsatisfied user of a diaper genie for about 3 1/2 years now. Fairly certain I couldn't hate the thing more. What's my issue with it? Well, the damn thing won't cut the friggin' poop-filled diapers loose. Make sense? I'm sure not.

Here's the deal - the diaper genie has this little thing you twist on the top that twists the cartridge that holds the bag. That creates a air lock between each diaper. Much like how you spin your bread before you put the twisty-tie on to keep the air out. Same concept. There's also a little button that you depress if you want to cut the liner (to empty it). That's my problem. That damn thing never works. Never has, never will. Craptacular design. So, every time you want to empty it, you need to get out the scissors to cut the damn thing free, which ends up stinking up the house in the process.

Long story short, if you want to buy a diaper genie, don't. They blow. Get that other one that's popular. I think it's called the diaper champ or something. Either way, it looks better. I guess.

I hate walmart self checkouts...

2008-06-22T22:45:00.002-05:00

So I was browsing PeaTot the other day and came across this blog post about Walmart self checkouts. I couldn't agree more. And it's not just Walmart. It's everywhere. Granted, just like everything else, walmart's are the worst. I swear, I'm going to get kicked out of that place soon - and it's going to be related to those damn self-checkouts. I hit one the other day in sheer frustration. It popped the little scale out of it and knocked it onto the floor. After that, my bananas wouldn't weight properly. Well, not that they really were before.

Anyway, those damn things are just the most un-user-friendly things ever. If you don't do everything just right, the damn thing goes nuts and won't do anything. And the flippin' bagger thingy doesn't realize you've already put stuff in the bag. Then the light starts flashing and you've got to get the 17 yr old walmart 'manager' to come fix the damn thing. Ugh. All that, and no discount. What a crock.

If I were a girlscout...

2008-06-12T23:39:00.003-05:00

Just down the road from my house, in the Chesterfield Valley, there is a new Lamborghini dealership going in. Right next to the Bently/Maserati dealership that's already there. Yeah, seriously.

Today, on my way home from work, I drove past the two on Hwy 40, like every other day. Except, today I had a thought. I thought, if I were a girl scout, I'd totally set up my cookie stand right in between the two dealerships, and then yell at people to buy my cookies.

"Hey! Girl Scout cookies here! If you can afford a $200,000 car, you can certainly drop $500 on some cookies! Cash only."

Parenting Community, Forums, Blogs - Connect with other Moms and Dads

2008-06-02T11:05:00.003-05:00

I'm really excited about a project we've been working on lately. It's called PeaTot.com. It's an online community for parents. There's forums, blogs, family friendly events, and tons of other great content. More than anything though, it's a great place for moms and dads to connect with each other, ask questions, and help each other out.

So, you're thinking, great, there's already other parenting websites out there, with the same community, forums, etc. How is PeaTot different? Well, the real differentiating factor is that at PeaTot, you get points for doing things you're already doing - posting to message boards and chatting with other parents, blogging, etc. The points can be redeemed for great rewards.

We've been seeing some great growth with the site, but it's tough competing against the large sites, with an almost non-existent budget. Anyway, if you're a mom or dad of a young one (or expecting!), please check it out.

Make Your Own Jumperoo

2008-05-29T12:50:00.002-05:00

A Jumperoo is a baby-jumping apparatus. How in the world do I know this? My wife told me. She said she wishes we had one for our 5 month old. She had to explain to me what this thing is. Here's a link to the official jumperoo, if you, like me, have no idea what one is.

So, after her explanation, I thought, 'dude, I could totally make that with like...a towel, some 2x4s, and a couple of bungee cords'. The wife won't let me make one of these, so if someone else out there can please put my idea to work and let me know how it turns out, that'd be great. I'll even feature you on my blog. That's a $79 value.

Here's how to build it:

1) Get a towel
2) Cut leg holes in it
3) Create reinforced holes in the edges (for the bungee cords to hook into)
4) Build a cube out of 2x4s. 3ft wide x 3ft deep x 3ft tall is probably a good dimension.
5) Secure bungee cords to 2x4 frame
6) Secure bungee cords to towel
7) Place baby in homemade jumperoo. It's probably best NOT to let your wife see this step, or let her know what you are doing until you have fully tested the jumperoo.

There you have it - A jumperoo for like...$12.

Nacho Cheese

2008-05-15T22:06:00.002-05:00

My blog has ads for nacho cheese. That's awesome. Maybe I'll get an endorsement deal.

Sonic Java Chillers

2008-05-15T21:58:00.002-05:00

I picked up a Java Chiller from Sonic tonight, so I thought I'd post a review of this new drink they have. I tried carmel. Over all, not too bad. Kind of like a mix of a frappuccino and a milk shake. I have to give them credit - everyone now is trying to make some sort of frozen coffee drink. I think they put a bit of a twist on it with the main base being ice cream, not ice. I think they're pretty good. A very very nice alternative to a frappuccino when you need a change.

Lyrics to Say What You Mean To Say, by John Mayer

2008-05-15T21:51:00.003-05:00

Wow. The response to my first post on John Mayer's Say What You Mean To Say has been so popular (seriously, a couple HUNDRED visits per month) that I decided I'd post the lyrics to the song. I have a feeling that's what a lot of people may be looking for.

So, here they are - full lyrics to the song.

Say what you mean to say

Say what you mean to say (in a slightly lower range)

Say what you mean to say (in a slightly higher range)

Repeat for 3 1/2 minutes.

Lonestar - Walking in Memphis

2008-04-28T21:33:00.004-05:00

I'm not a big country fan, but I do run across it every once in a while when there is nothing else on the radio and the CD's just aren't doin' it for me. So, recently, I heard a cover of 'Walking in Memphis' by Lonestar. First off, I pretty much hate these guys anyway. But then, to screw up an absolutely great song by Marc Cohn is just not a good plan. I'm sure there are plenty of teeny-boppers out there that have no idea who Marc Cohn is and think that Lonestar wrote this song. They didn't. They obliterated it. It's the worst thing I've ever heard. Whoever is the lead singer in Lonestar is absolutely horrid and can't seem to keep any sort of timing. He's jumping all over the place and somehow managed to remove every ounce of emotion in the song. Congratulations Lonestar, another song destroyed. They should have never named a steakhouse after you. You're not worthy.

We just might have the worst trash company ever...

2008-04-13T21:34:00.002-05:00

Around January of 2007, the City of Lake Saint Louis entered into a new contract with Christian Disposal to provide waste removal and recycling services for residents. The previous contract was with Onxy, who later changed their name to Veolia. After a bumpy start with Veolia, they got their act together and became very reliable. I absolutely did not like them at first because of the problems, but by the end of the contract, they were doing great and I was impressed with how they turned it around so quickly. In fact, I even wrote them a letter thanking them and sent it in with my last payment.

So, enter January 2007 and Christian Disposal. It was an absolute mess. They actually somehow conned the city into letting them skip our first two pickups because they couldn't get their shit together. So, that made me unhappy. Especially with tons of diapers now piling up in the garage.

Over the first year, the problems just continued. Here's a little background... We have twice a week pickup - on Tuesday and Friday. Most people have only the Tuesday pickup. We pay extra for the second pickup. Well, right off the bat, they couldn't seem to figure out to pickup our trash on Friday, too. So, I was patient and called them numerous times to remind them / complain. They always said they'd come get it on Saturday. Sometimes they did, sometimes they didn't. That was pretty annoying.

So, this continued. And continued. In May of 2007 I started working from home. I would regularly call them at 3:30 on Friday afternoon to remind them to pickup our trash. Numerous times I actually contacted our Alderwoman, who would contact people at the city and the trash company and let them know we were having problems. Numerous times I was told the 'route supervisor' would call me. Never did.

Then, there was a Saturday where they were supposed to pick up because of a holiday. I saw the truck drive half way down our street and turn around. I immediately called them and literally told them if they didn't pick up the trash that day, I was going to drive it to their office and leave it at their front door. I was so fed up with these people. Now, not that that was the right thing to do, but seriously. I'd called, I'd even sent letters with my payments, and I'd sent e-mails. I'd never hear back from them.

So, all of this continued and I contacted the alderwoman in February or March. She contacted the company and got not response. Nor did they contact me. Additionally, I contacted them at that time - via phone and e-mail. Was told the 'route supervisor' would call me back. Never happened. Shocking. So, when my payment was due (March 24), I sent them a note. No check. Just a note. It went something like this...

Since you sometimes 'pretend' to pickup my trash, I am pretending to pay you. I have left numerous phone messages and e-mails and have never been contacted. I have been told by customer service that the route supervisor would call me, but never has. I am fed up and have had enough. I have contacted the city and the alderman and then have received no word back from you. I fully intend to do everything I can to ensure your contract is not renewed. As soon as someone calls me back, I will gladly pay you. Until then, I expect my trash to continue to be picked up.

Then I signed it, and left two phone number where they could reach me. As of today, no word yet, but they are still picking up my trash. I'm wondering if they're just too disorganized to realize I haven't paid them...

Lawn striping is popular, too

2008-04-08T22:00:00.002-05:00

So, in a follow-up to my Ron Pratte post below, lawn striping is popular. I actually do fairly well in Google searches, both from this blog and my page decided to making your own lawn striper. It's amazing that this many people are as psychotic as I am. That reminds me...it's about time to make the latest version of the lawn striper and post up new directions...

I plan to abuse my tags

2008-04-08T21:10:00.001-05:00

Fair warning. I plan to abuse my tags. See right-hand column.

Who in the hell is Ron Pratte?

2008-04-08T21:06:00.003-05:00

Really? If you know who he is, please post a comment. I keep getting traffic on my blog for people searching for Ron Pratte. I had a post a while about about Ron Pratte. Ever since, I've been getting traffic from people searching for him. I'm sure they're highly disappointed to see that I'm asking who he is and that my post was just part of my Google Trends experiment. Interesting though, it seems the post does get some traffic, making me think that Google actually picked up on it because it was hot at the time. Same for my post about the American Idol flunkie Julie Dubela.

Blogs are cool.

Cheese. It's yummy.

2008-04-08T21:02:00.003-05:00

'nuf said.

Just kidding. Seriously though, cheese is damn good.

Lately, I've been dying for some of that super-cheap, crappy nacho-cheese-in-a-can. I couldn't find any - even the giant 5lb industrial size. Well, Jen found some the other day. I gave it a try tonight. It was delicious. If it was the version a bit spicier, it would be great, but damn this stuff was good. Glad I've still got most of the can left.

I'm talking about the cheese that kind of looks / smells like melted Velveeta, but it's not near as disgusting. Velveeta just might be the most disgusting thing on the planet. I hate that stuff. I call it 'plastic cheese'. When you first open it, the cheese has formed to the shape of the foil / plastic shrink wrapped wrapper it's in. You see all of the creases. Yuck. Then, you melt the stuff and it's nice and gooey, then it cools a bit and gets this nasty film on top of it.

Seriously, stop making Velveeta.

Convertibles and rain

2008-04-08T20:56:00.002-05:00

On my way home today, I passed a guy driving a convertible Camaro. His little girlfriend / wife was with him. You could just tell, this guy thought he was the coolest dude on earth, with his little Foakley sunglasses and his big fat arm hanging over the door. So, unfortunately, in Missouri, this is not an uncommon sight - a 40 year old guy driving a 10+ yr old Camaro, thinking he's hot stuff.

OK, so you're right, that in and of itself is not funny. Here's where it gets funny...it was cloudy. And it had been raining all day. And was supposed to keep raining. This genius seemed to think that having the top down was a good idea. At this point, he's right behind me as we cross over the river into St. Charles County. As soon as we cross over, it starts raining a little bit. I see him and his little girlfriend or whatever start to squirm a bit. It starts raining harder. And harder. Next thing I know, big guy's got his hand over her head and he's rolled up the windows. As if that is going to give them protection. I just drove along, keeping an eye on them in my rearview mirror, laughing. It was pretty funny.

Big man got smart and decided to exit the highway - presumably to put up the room. I bet the girlfriend was impressed with the sweet Camaro.

John Mayer - Say What You Mean To Say

2008-03-31T15:08:00.002-05:00

So the other day I was at the gas station and they were playing music. While I was pumping gas, I heard that John Mayer song, 'Say what you meant to say'. I seriously sat there the whole time thinking, 'No, dude. You say whatever the hell it is you mean to say. And quit saying the same damn thing over and over 7,000 times for 3 1/2 minutes.' Seriously. That has got to be one of the most annoying songs ever.

Everyone panic! The earth is melting!

2008-03-25T21:15:00.003-05:00

Quick! Freak out! The world is melting. We're all going to die!

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080325/ap_on_sc/antarctica_collapse

Give me a f'ing break. The beginning of this story makes it sound like the world is going to flood in two days and we're all going to die. Read on, though. This fucking piece of ice accounts for 4 percent of this particular 'shelf' and isn't going to raise sea levels. But, we should still freak out because the fucking planet is getting hotter. Bullshit.

That being said, should we be more careful about the environment? Yes. Is global warming real? Probably. Is it a big deal? Probably not. Has it happened before? Probably. I'm sure in 50 years we'll all be freaking out about the massive global cooling happening. It's going to kill the lions in africa because it will be too cold for them.

Seriously, some 'scientists' need better things to do with their time. Go invent something cool. Or heal someone. Or both.

Summit Industrial Products - Lube

2008-03-20T21:33:00.002-05:00

I found something interesting today. There's a search engine optimization firm that is guaranteeing page 1 rankings. Google themselves even says that if someone guarantees you page 1 rankings, be leery. I think this company is up to something. First off, it's way too cheap. Second, there's no way to guarantee someone the results they are in the time they are guaranteeing it. Plus, their testimonials seem a bit shady. Anyway, I determined that one of the terms they had optimized someone for was summit lube. So, I created a little page about Summit Lube. Just a one pager on the backend of Koenigland. Normally, I wouldn't think this would work, but I've gotten some fairly amazing results with my lawn striper page, which I never intended to be visited much at all. So anyway, I wrote some stuff about Summit Industrial Products and am hoping that Google picks up the page pretty quickly and indexes it. I'm curious to see where it ranks, compared to the other page. Something just seems fishy, so I'm curious to see what happens. Hopefully I don't forget to check back...

Spring is almost here...time for lawn striping!

2008-03-18T22:34:00.002-05:00

It's about that time to start striping the lawn!

I love spring. I love watching flowers bloom, trees come to life, and the lawn green up!!! I'm excited because it's about time to start working on my new lawn striper model. As with the last model, this one will attach to the back of the mower. However, I'm planning on a pivot design, which I think will yield much better results. Last results were good, but the damn thing was difficult to use. Difficult to maneuver, plus, it didn't roll like I thought it should. It was more of a dragging motion, which I'm afraid will tear up the lawn. I have high hopes though. I'll update the lawn striper site as soon as I create an updated version!

OK, so maybe I'm not prophetic....

2008-03-15T23:02:00.002-05:00

I just found this posting. It's funny because, well, I haven't posted in almost a month. I was bragging about how good I am at this. I've been soooo busy at work. Plus, we put up a new site on March 4th. We're working on a new blog, which means I need to come up with entries for that blog. Obviously, they'll be quite different from this blog. Plus, we have a news section on the new site, which means that I really need to work on figuring out newsworthy items and writing little news stories for the site. All of this writing I have to do - in addition to my real job.

Anyway, I'm happy the new site is up. We took the opportunity to launch the new site and announce that we're now offering search engine marketing services, including search engine optimization and pay-per-click management.

I'm excited about the new services. We've been studying these things for a while now, doing some research / testing, as well as doing some work on our own site and helping a few clients for free, just to make sure we can generate some results. I won't name any names, but we took a site from being virtually invisible on the search engines, to being on page 1 of google for multiple key phrases. Before we started, this site was ranked like, #67 for one of the terms that it now shows up on the first page. Based on that, and some other results, we felt like we actually had something here and could feel confident selling this service to clients.

I find the whole search engine optimization and pay-per-click arena very interesting. PPC is very similar to direct mail, except you know you have a captivated audience, plus, you have an amazing amount of data you can gather and report on in order to improve your ROI and track results. I can't wait to get these services off the ground the see what happens!