The Canberra Cook

The Omnivore's Hundred

2008-08-22T10:33:00.010+10:00

I've decided that I won't do a Salmagundi every week. Yes, I know I haven't anyway, but it was my original intention. But I do have a bit of internet fluff for you. The Omnivore's Hundred is going round the foodie bits of the net. I found it via Chocolate and Zucchini. The idea is that you:
1) Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3) Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
4) Optional extra: Post a comment at www.verygoodtaste.co.uk linking to your results.

So I'm giving it a go, though adding some commentary as I go. So if you want to do it, too, it will be easier to copy the list from the original link, not mine. For the full list read on.

The VGT Omnivore’s Hundred:

1. Venison
2. Nettle tea - huh?
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp - hardly worth it.
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich - I prefer PB&H.
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart - in New York!
16. Epoisses - an unpasteurised milk washed-rind cheese, I don't think we can get it here.
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras - one day...
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper - tasted, but I couldn't eat a whole one.
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda - I really should. Sounds yummy.
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl - not quite. New England clam chowder, with sourdough bread on the side, sure.
33. Salted lassi - I prefer sweet, though.
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar separately. Isn't this supposed to be a crime against cognac? Prime single malt whisky, yes.
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O - I think I'm too old.
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects - umm, I almost crossed this off but I might summon up the courage to try it once.
43. Phaal - hotter than a vindaloo? Where do you get it? It's not in any of my curry cookbooks so I suspect it's a British braggart invention.
44. ~~Goat’s milk~~ - yoghurt, yes. Plain milk, no. I don't even like cow's milk.
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu - eh, maybe one day, It's expensive and I'd probably prefer tuna sashimi.
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut - YUK!
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. ~~McDonald’s Big Mac Meal~~ - I don't do maccas. I ate a burger from them once a couple of decades back, I can't remember which one.
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini - not yet! But I bet I will very soon. Regular martinis, yes.
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine - I must go to Canada again one day.
60. Carob chips - meh.
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin - clay????!
64. Currywurst - I missed doing this when I was in Germany because I prefer other sausages, especially Weisswurst.
65. Durian - never again.
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain - I hate bananas, so I doubt I'd like it.
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette - I don't like the texture of tripe, so maybe not.
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini - not real expensive caviar though.
73. Louche absinthe - I've had absinthe in mixed drinks but haven't yet tried this classic method.
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. ~~Roadkill~~ Why????
76. Baijiu - not 100% sure if this is the same as the rice spirit I drank too much of in Vietnam...
77. Hostess Fruit Pie - I lived in America once.
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant - there isn't one in Australia. But I bet Tetsuya's would be worthy.
85. Kobe beef - Australian Wagyu, too.
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers - nasturtiums are spicy, good in salads. Crystallised violets are nice.
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate - not sure. Possibly.
91. Spam
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee - New Guinea Blue Mountains yes, it's the same variety but different terroire.
100. Snake - does it count if it's infused in rice spirit? Weird meaty vodka-like stuff, that was.

So that's it then. I make about 75%. There's nothing specifically Australian on the list, though it does Europe, the Americas, and a few bits of Asia. I'm thinking of making up an Australian one. Maybe next week?

Ainslie IGA

2008-08-19T20:10:00.003+10:00

Yesterday I popped into the Ainslie IGA after my evening yoga class. It's been a long time since I was last there, and it seems like it has expanded. Either that or my memory sucks. Anyway, it's an interesting IGA to browse around.

They have a clientele that is obviously a lot more gourmet and green conscious than my Watson local. You can tell this, because they stock a lot more organic products, including meat, and lots of vegetarian pseudo-meat things. They also have a large range of Poachers' Pantry smoked meats, good Italian bread, and fresh fish, and a rather good deli section. I wasn't produce shopping, but as I walked past it all looked nice and fresh.

They do BBQ chickens at the deli - but not just ordinary ones. There's free range. I really wanted to buy one of those, but they'd sold out, so I just got the regular kind. As BBQ chooks go it's a whisker on the superior side of the standard. The stuffing is the usual greasy stodge, but it does seem to actually taste of a few herbs, and the chook itself wasn't overdone. Nice coleslaw, too.

Searchlights and Sirens, the Ad

2008-08-18T13:19:00.001+10:00

Hello everybody, I'm back on my feet at last with just a minor cough lingering on. Still not really cooking, though. For example, this week after work I have yoga on Monday, and rehearsals on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. The weekend was pretty packed, too, with all-day rehearsals for choir concert and burlesque show on Sunday. Yes, two all day rehearsals in one day. Don't ask.

Anyway, please come to my stuff. For Searchlight and Sirens, you need to call the Ainslie Football Club on 6248 8422 to book, as there is a two course meal involved. If you need vegetarian meals or other special diets, tell them when you book. There's a facebook event version, if you care for that sort of thing. The cost is $50 for dinner and show. Drinks extra.

It's going to be great fun - lots of vintage fashion and song and dance. I'm mostly dressed as a land army girl in my RetroSpec'd outfit. It's burlesque, which for the uninitiated means there is some sexual innuendo (oooh-err) and stripping, but it's in fun and only part way, not at all in a sleazy strip club style. About PG rated.

I don't have a flyer for the choir concert yet, but it's 3pm on Sunday September 7th, at the Wesley Music Centre in Forrest. It's romantic music in several senses, from madrigals and other songs of lurrve, to actual romantic composers Schubert and Brahms. That's two days before I go to China. Cutting it fine, there...

Internet Salmagundi IV

2008-08-15T10:10:00.005+10:00

How to poach an egg - with pictures of attempts gone hilariously wrong.

How to make American buttermilk pancakes.

Eat yoghurt! The official food of women.

Oh. My. God.

It looks like I might be in the wrong job.

Some American nutters are trying to boycott Maccas because they have gay-friendly employee policies. Even this isn't enough to get me to go there, but I do hope the loonies are not organising anything by email.

The bloke sent me a brilliant wrongcard. What a cool site - I wandered about and stumbled on this expression of cephalopod joy. And from there I was inspired in a totally, absolutely no way is this safe for work, or children with weak hearts, or impressionable grandparents, or possibly even your sanity, my god this is full of adult themes kind of way, I was moved to revisit the Ghastly comics. It ran from 2001 to 2006, more or less weekly. This beginning cracked me up and is sort of safe-ish. Beyond, there be monsters. Warning: contains extremely explicit sex scenes, nudity, adult themes, tentacle monsters, hentai, futanari, chibis, furries and Drunk and Bitter Jesus. Don't go there, OK?

VB for lunch

2008-08-12T22:05:00.001+10:00

Naah, I don't actually drink VB. When you are a Cadbury's girl like me, you may as well drink really good ones for your one or two drinks. No need for bulk cheapness. But actually, this isn't about beer at all. It's about a cafe.

I have a regular lunch date with Beth, and we go somewhere on (or very near) the ANU campus. It's mostly PP or VB, or the Gods for a bit of a treat. That's either the Purple Pickle, over by the Sports Union, or Vanilla Bean, in the new John Curtin Building. VB is closer, but PP is good if the weather is nice, as there's lots of outdoor seating. They're quite similar, as you'd expect since they're run by the same family.

The Vanilla Bean is a weekday place, open from breakfast to afternoon tea. The lunch menu includes pizzas, salads, burgers, pastas and risottos, with hot dishes around the $10-15 mark. There's pre-made rolls, and muffins and cookies and slices, yum yum. They also do fresh waffles. The blackboard specials vary every day.

Today I had one of the specials - a grilled chicken breast, with sundried tomato polenta, and caramelised fennel. It was $13.50, and I would have been delighted with it had it been at a fancy restaurant for $30. It was so good - the chicken was perfectly cooked with a light spice marinade outside, and tender and juicy inside; the polenta was soft and creamy and rich; the fennel was a generous chunk nicely browned. Wow. I was very impressed. I couldn't eat it all so I'll have leftovers for lunch tomorrow.

You can't count on total excellence every day. But I don't think I've ever had a bad meal there. We keep on going back, as it's a reliably decent kind of a place. The coffee is pretty good; the chocolate brownies are a favourite of mine; the pizzas are generously sized and freshly baked on a good crust. There's always some good vegetarian choices, and there's plenty of variety to suit almost any mood. And once in a while it's amazing.

Livin' in the Seventies

2008-08-11T22:34:00.001+10:00

That's the Charcoal Restaurant on London Circuit. I swear, their menu and decor have not changed since I was a schoolgirl, and got to go there for the occasional treat with my parents. Though the prices have risen a little, and I doubt the grass matting on the ceiling would actually have lasted forty years. And the weird specification of GST on the menu wouldn't have happened back then.

But the menu is a blast from the past - avocado vinaigrette, oysters kilpatrick, tournedos rossini, beef stroganoff. And, of course, charcoal grilled steaks of all sorts of cuts, in sizes ranging from 180g up to a very scary full kilogram.

The bloke and I went there on Friday night, after a cocktail and some very good cheese at the Parlour. We almost had a larger party, but our friends had to bail out at the last minute, literally at the table. We weren't too bright and chirpy ourselves, but we needed dinner so we stayed. The waitress coped with admirable grace, and we had excellent service throughout.

Since we'd eaten snacks already, we went straight for the mains, Tournedos Rossini for me, Tournedos Bearnaise for the bloke. They arrived cooked exactly to order, served with a foil-baked potato and some steamed vegetables. The waitress comes around with parmesan, sour cream and chives for you to dress your potato as you like. The potato seemed a bit watery to me, but the vegetables were fresh and nicely done - not overdone at all, as you might suspect from the vintage style.

I was very pleased with my steak - properly rare, nicely charcoalled but not to excess. The mushroom sauce was perhaps a bit old-fashionedly gluey with flour thickener, but otherwise good. The chicken liver pate wasn't on the toast underneath the steak as is traditional, but on top. It was, well, OK, rather than a great one. No foie gras, that's for sure. And the toast was totally soggy and useless. It wasn't the great dish invented by Carême, but for a steak with mushroom sauce it was pretty damned fine, and obviously you don't get foie gras for $35. The bloke's béarnaise sauce was excellent - lively with tarragon and rich with butter; I thought his was the better dish.

We had a bottle of Pialligo Estate Cab Sav, which was pleasantly quaffable once it was aerated enough, but no great star. The wine list is quite good, with some serious fancy French reds and Granges, as well as the more affordable types. With that, and a couple of predinner drinks, the bill came to $120, which seemed just a little on the steep side to me. While I was much too full to eat dessert, I wish I'd at least looked at the dessert menu. I'd place money on there being a chocolate mousse, cheesecake and pavlova.

I think I'm allergic to July

2008-08-06T12:55:00.004+10:00

Yes, it's August now, but this gives me hope that my current lurgi will be the last one of the season. That encephalitis virus arrived right at the beginning of July, and my current delightful ~~house~~ lung guests, the Hemophilus influenzae bacteria, turned up at the end of July. My "cold" last week got worserer. A course of heavy duty antibiotics and a lot of lying down is my current plan. Boot out those damn lodgers!

So yeah, I'm not cooking and not eating out much. In a brief spurt of pseudo-recovery on the weekend, I managed to eat out just enough to meet my Canberra Times commitments And to make a proper pasta dinner, with a sauce out of the freezer. But that's all. Nothing seriously worth blogging. I even missed that talk at ANU, damn it.

Things I've been eating & drinking:
* tinned soup
* tinned ravioli
* tinned spaghetti
* yoghurt (probiotic kind, should help with the antibiotic digestive side effects)
* Lean Cuisine pastas
* prepack custard and tinned fruit
* takeaway laksa (thanks to the bloke)
* hot Ribena - with and without rum
* hot toddies
* black tea with honey, and maybe brandy

I know, I know. Tinned spaghetti & ravioli are abominable crimes against Italy, but I don't think of them as pasta, just as weird invalid food. Some of the new tinned soups aren't bad, though. Especially those tetra pack veggie ones. I even eat those for lunch when I'm well.

Interesting Talk Next Week

2008-08-01T14:51:00.002+10:00

A talk at ANU, by Donna Lee Brien, entitled "Enabling New Ways of Thinking about the World? The Australian Food Writer as Activist" might be of interest to our local food bloggers. It's on Tuesday at 1pm, so might be possible for some who can be flexible around lunchtime.

For details see http://billboard.anu.edu.au/event_view.asp?id=30163

Recipe of the week: hot toddy

2008-07-31T21:41:00.001+10:00

I've made a lot of these this week.

Hot Toddy
1 nip whisky
1 nip lemon juice
2 teaspoons honey
200ml boiling water
Mix honey with boiling water and stir well to dissolve. Add lemon juice first, then whisky, and stir again. Taste, and add more honey if you like it sweeter. Serve with a side of sudafed or codral to taste...

Notes:A nip is 30ml, or 1 1/2 tablespoons.

This is a highly variable recipe. This week I've mostly been using dark rum, with a tiny dash of clove cordial. I also use Irish whisky - do not waste the single malt! Green ginger wine isn't bad, either, and brandy is classic.

The reason for adding the spirits last is to let the liquid cool a little, so less alcohol escapes. Alcohol is an excellent cough suppressant, and this can really help you get to sleep at times when it might be hard. A lot of alcohol is very bad for sleep, of course, but a little is no problem. The wowsers have caused this to be dropped from the repertoire of officially approved treatments for colds, but sod that. It works well. Don't drink 17 of them. Duh.

No more Starbucks!

2008-07-30T18:04:00.002+10:00

Hurrah! All four of the Starbucks outlets in Canberra are closing! They are part of the 61 out of 84 outlets that are closing down in Australia. I like to think that this a triumph of good taste. Although given the general standard of coffee in Canberra, perhaps not so much. Now if only Gloria Jean's would follow suit - their coffee is even worse, and the beans ludicrously expensive to boot. And that's not even considering some other reasons that I dislike them.

I'm sorry for the folks who have lost their jobs, though, and especially for the people who were so nice as to provide a spot for the local Bookcrossing group. Maybe they could try opening a cafe? I hear there are going to be a few places available soon.

Corned Beef and all that jazz

2008-07-27T18:40:00.006+10:00

Corned beef with mash, cabbage, and parsley sauce - a British classic, and actually pretty tasty with it. Especially when you add some hot mustard. But what was I thinking again? This requires at least one pan per component. And the bloke is sick, so who's going to clean up? And there are lots of one pot recipes for corned beef and cabbage. Why am I not doing one of those? I must be daft.

This week I have rehearsals Sun, Tues & Thurs, and a yoga class on Monday. I need quick reheatable food, and this should mostly fit the bill. The potato, cabbage and sauce can last one more meal, and there's still plenty of corned beef for sandwiches. Perhaps a pasta on Wednesday will help vary things, and bought soup and cheese toasties are always an option. And there's baked beans left over from last week.

So anyway, I went ahead with the four pot dinner, and took a photo even though it's not the most photogenic of meals. One of the pots is for a simple potato mash with some turnip in it. Recipe: boil in lightly salted water for 20 minutes, drain, mash, add butter or milk to taste. More detailed recipes for the rest follow:

Corned Beef in Beer
1.5 kg piece of corned beef
1 jug beer
1 onion
6 cloves
1/2 teaspoon peppercorns
Rinse corned beef and put in slow cooker or large saucepan. Cover with beer, add onion and spices. Cook on slow cooker's high setting, or at a very slow simmer for 4-5 hours.

Light Parsley Sauce
1 cup chicken stock
1 cup non-fat milk
1 onion
2 bay leaves
1 bunch parsley, leaves chopped finely, stems saved
2 tablespoons cornflour
Combine milk and chicken stock, add onion, bay leaf and the parsley stems. Bring to a simmer, then turn off heat and leave to infuse for an hour or two. To make the sauce, strain the cool milk and stock mixture into a saucepan, and stir in the cornflour, mixing well. Bring to a simmer, stirring frequently. When the sauce thickens, add the chopped parsley.

Note: if the milk isn't cool, mix up the cornflour in a 1/4 cup of water first, to avoid lumps. I invented this sauce when we were more determinedly trying to lose weight, and I like it rather better than the usual bechamel in this context. Adding some lemon zest is a nice option.

Saute Cabbage
1/4 cabbage, shredded, rinsed well
1 onion, sliced
1 apple, peeled & sliced
1 tablespoon of light oil
1 teaspoon caraway seeds
1 tablespoon cider vinegar
Fry onion in oil until lightly golden. Add caraway seeds, apple and cabbage. There should still be some water clinging to the cabbage; if not add 1/4 cup or so. Add the vinegar. Let this cook down for 5-20 minutes depending on how well done you like it. I prefer it quite soft with the corned beef.

Internet Salmagundi III

2008-07-25T09:00:00.002+10:00

Yes, I've made another random list of stuff that I found and liked.

What if cookbooks were like D&D manuals?

Why Germany lost the war - not seriously, just a funny picture.

This is a fun geography quiz. I get to level 10 or 11, because my African geography really sucks.

You know how I was thinking Obama was the better choice in the US elections, but these women for McCain make a lot of awfully good points... And Cindy is doing well in the vote for your favourite presidential spouse's cookie recipe! Because that's really important to global security.

Here's a useful idea: the Stupid Filter. Do you get comments on your blog that are just, well, really stupid. I don't, but I read a lot of scienceblogs, and the quacks and fundies are found there in force. Not sure if a post is stupid? Try this.

Speaking of scienceblogs, I found this at PZ Myer's place way back in June: a mostly un-depressing piece about cancer and the need to support cancer research.

It put me in mind of the classic xkcd - Science. It works, bitches. I love xkcd. If I were in Kansas I would probably vote for Sean Tevis, because he's also a fan.

Finally, what's your star sign? Maybe not what you think...

What we ate this week

2008-07-24T22:27:00.003+10:00

Just a quick outline of the menu.

On Sunday I was a bit tired after the Sydney trip, and a rehearsal. I made up a quick microwave risotto and some salad for dinner. The risotto flavours were good - swiss brown mushrooms, Poachers' Pantry smoked tomatoes and fetta. But I find that you do notice the poorer texture of the microwave version more, if you don't have parmesan cheese adding creaminess.

On Monday the bloke and I went to yoga class in Ainslie, and had burgers at Edgars for dinner. This was a disappointment. For $10, with a drink included, I guess it was not too bad a deal. But it was one of the worst burgers I've eaten in some time. The bread and salad and chips were OK, but the patty, supposedly Cajun in flavour, was plain nasty. I remember Edgars being generally quite nice; I wonder if they have a new cook? I still like Edgar's anyway. It's an unpretentious local pub at Ainslie shops; they stock James Squires beers, and do (or did) a decent line in pub grub. I'll have to try again and report back if that was an anomaly.

On Tuesday I had another rehearsal, and after a big lunch (to be written up for a column) I didn't feel like much dinner. I just ate a tomato sandwich on some nice sourdough bread from Dobinsons bakery in Civic. The bloke had ham and cheese toasties while I was out, I think. Wednesday was ham steaks, with green beans and reheated leftover risotto. Tonight it was baked beans on toast - home made baked beans and sourdough toast, not bad at all.

Baked Beans

2008-07-22T10:14:00.001+10:00

I'm home on a Tuesday, and I'm making baked beans. No, I'm not sick again, but I have to go to work on Friday for a meeting. Since I work four days a week and not Friday, the easiest thing for me to do is to take a different day off than usual. As soon as I thought of that, today seemed perfect - what with being sick, and going to Sydney, things have got a bit out of control. I need to unpack, tidy up, shop, and do laundry, and write newspaper columns, and do the research for my writing. So far I've put on the laundry, cleaned out a shelf and put some stuff away, made the shopping list, and I'm all set to go out.

Baked beans can cook while I'm out. They don't need much attention, since I'm using the slow cooker. I made this recipe up on the spot, based on experience with any number of other versions I've made in the past, and what just happened to be in the house.

Recipe: Baked Beans with Ham
1 cup haricot or navy beans
1 tin chopped tomatoes
1 onion
1 tablespoon molasses
1 tablespoon cider vinegar
1 teaspoon dry mustard
100g lean ham
water
brown sugar, salt, pepper to taste
Soak the beans overnight in plenty of water. Drain, and dump beans into slow cooker. Chop the onion finely, and the ham into small cubes. Mix in with beans, add tinned tomatoes, molasses, vinegar and mustard. Add about another tomato tin of water to make sure beans are well covered. Do NOT add salt.

Cook on slow setting for 6-8 hours. Stir occasionally if you're around, and add a little water if it seems to be drying out. When beans are soft enough for your taste, add salt, pepper and brown sugar to taste.

Notes: Adding salt earlier will tend to harden the beans. Use no-salt tomatoes if you can. I'd normally do double this amount, but I only had one cup of beans left in the pantry. A vegetarian modification is obvious: just leave out the ham. If you fancy Boston style baked beans, leave out the tomato, use more ham and onion, and add at least 4 tablespoons of brown sugar. I'll probably only use 1 tablespoon. A ham hock is traditional, but I had some regular ham that needed using up.

Sydney Shopping, Lunch, Beer & Brunch

2008-07-21T21:16:00.008+10:00

We took Belinda & Michael to the airport on the weekend. They're off for a 3 month grand tour of the Baltic. Such a long trip - it's very odd to think that before they get back, Beth and I will have been to Tibet and back. Anyway, this seemed like a good opportunity to do some shopping, and we did it with great efficiency. We had planned to drive down Friday night, but everybody was too tired, so it got put off to Saturday.

In our lightning tour, we managed to get to Retrospec'd in Newtown, where I got 1940s swing pants in grey, and a red and white spotted blouse to go with it. It's going to be one of my costumes for the Searchlights and Sirens burlesque show - dinner & show $50; Fri 29th August, come and see! I'm singing and dancing. The bloke ordered some cool black & white swing dance shoes from them, which they didn't have in stock in the right size & colour, but will post. We also went to the rather fabulous (mostly menswear) Anton's, where the bloke bought two jackets and I got a top hat. I have no idea when I'm going to wear a top hat, but I'm sure I'll think of something. Add in a quick trawl round Galaxy and Abbey's, and we were done, all in a few hours. Phew!

We ate at three different places, and I was happy with them all. We grabbed a late and much needed quick lunch in the QVB basement. You may know that the place is full of rather expensive and dull cafes, but on the way out to the rest of the underground malls there's a place called "Malaysian Laksa House" with cheap but sound Malaysian & Indonesian fast food. You can get a beer there, even. I had a gado gado ($8.50), and the bloke had a beef rendang with rice ($7.50). Mine was better, I think. They used a lot of iceberg lettuce in the veggie salad, where cabbage is more traditional, but it worked well. Plenty of spicy peanut sauce, and lots of fresh crunchy veggies.

We had dinner at Red Oak, which is a wonderful boutique brewery. There's a casual bar there, and a more formally arranged dining room, all in the same large space. They like to use beer in the cooking - even the desserts. Each menu item is matched with a beer. I had three beers: starting with a crisp Kölsch style, I moved on to a honey ale with my tagliatelle with clams ($18), and a Belgium chocolate stout with my sticky date pudding and porter icecream ($12). Yes, a beer icecream! It was great. The honey ale is made with Tasmanian leatherwood, and has all the complex aromas without too much sweetness. The chocolate stout is infused with dark belgian chocolate, it's also got all the aromas without much sweetness. Amazing stuff.

I forget exactly what the bloke had to drink, but his lamb and oatmeal stout sausages and mash ($20) came with a porter, and his cheese tasting plate ($20) with four different beers (in very small glasses). It cost us $100 even for the two courses each, a salad, and several beers. We ordered from the cheap end of the main course menu, but they only go up to about $30, anyway. It seemed like very good value to me. The beer really is terrifically good there, and they have all the awards to prove it.

Brunch next morning was at Not Bread Alone, where we all met up with the bloke's Mum. It's in Crows Nest, and we chose it as a sort of half way point, convenient to neither party. It turned out to be a good choice. The coffee was good, the portions were generous, and everybody seemed happy with their choice. Belinda's ricotta hotcakes ($14.50) were very thick and fluffy, and came with bananas and a huge chunk of passionfruit butter. My French toast with rhubarb and maple syrup ($13.50) was made with two large slices of sourdough. Good stuff, a bit more eggy that I usually make it. The big breakfast and omelettes looked good, too. The service was fine to start with, but was rather on the slow side later, when we were ordering second rounds of coffee. We didn't get cranky with it: in some ways that just made it more relaxed. No pressure to eat and run. We ended up lingering just a little too long, and got back to Canberra half an hour late for rehearsal.

Oh, and we didn't see the pope. Good. More regrettably, we didn't see any of our Sydney friends either, but it was a very short flying visit. Next time...

My Cafe and Lyneham Pide Hut

2008-07-16T20:49:00.007+10:00

The lack of cooking continues, but of course we still have to eat. The cauliflower & macaroni cheese did for two nights, and for two other nights we've had Turkish pide. The pide came about because we were having evening visitors. With me being rather out of commission, and Belinda madly packing for the three month grand tour, we asked Beth to bring the food. We supplied money, drinks, and dishwasher loading.

Beth bought our dinner at the Lyneham Pide Hut. It wasn't bad at all. I enjoyed the very fresh warm Turkish bread, and a good Cacik dip - that's Turkish tzatziki. The zucchini balls were nicely done, still crisp on the outside and cooked through. This matters - if you're a fan of these fritters you'll know that it's common to get them a bit raw in the middle.

We had four pides, two vego and two meat, and they were OK. The mushroom pide had the best filling, including some good black olives; the lamb and mixed vegetable were OK, but the pastrimali seemed slightly wrong. Not that it was off, just perhaps a tiny bit oxidised as if the meat had been sitting around uncovered too long. It's not the best pide ever - I prefer the pide from Dickson, which comes up fluffier and fatter and cheesier - but it's quite respectable. We fed six people dinner, and had to my estimate at least four more meals in leftovers, at a cost of $95 all up. Good value takeaway; we were happy with it.

In a separate event, I had afternoon tea at My Cafe in Manuka on Sunday. I wanted to write this up as a Find column, but it really wasn't good enough for that. I'm very taken by the concept of their lillipilli pikelets and wattlecino. Australian flavours are not used enough, and I was all set to encourage this with a column about "Aussie Arvo Tea" in the Canberra Times. If you have a podium, use it, I say!

Anyway, it wasn't so good. The service was fine, the menu is good, the buzz is good, and there are plenty of outdoor heaters. Belinda thought her French toast with banana and bacon was one of the better examples of its kind. And it's great that they serve breakfast until 5pm.

My wattlecino ($5.40) came in a mug, and was too weakly flavoured. I remember having it before, last year sometime, and it came in a cup, and that was fine. The lillipilli pikelets ($12ish) come in a big stack of six fat pikelets, and the mixed spicy apply berry flavour is good. They were a bit dry and tough around the edges, probably from reheating. I recalled that they had actual berry chunks in them, but these ones were even and devoid of fruit. Perhaps made with lillipilli jelly in the batter? It's served with a berry compote, and although it was winter this was served cold. An unfortunate choice - but even worse, some were still frozen in the middle. I can't in all conscience recommend it other than as a curiosity. Excellent idea, but needs work.

But hey, try it at home! To make wattlecino you need an espresso machine, and wattleseed. It's not cheap, but you could try variations like adding some to plunger coffee, or perhaps infusing in milk before straining it off to make hot chocolate. The seed is a bit gritty in texture to just add to milk as is. And if you can't find lillipillies, you can buy a jar of lillipilli conserve online. Sometimes the Essential Ingredient has them frozen, and quite a lot of gourmet food shops will have the preserve. I got some from a woman who makes her own, and sells it at the Bungendore market. Lillipillies are also known as riberries. Technically I think there's many varieties of lillipilli and the riberry is only one of them, but if you're food shopping rather than gardening that won't matter.

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A little catch up

2008-07-13T12:08:00.004+10:00

I'm not dead yet. You'd think with all this loitering palely on the couch that I'd have plenty of time to blog, but somehow it hasn't worked. I have got an Internet Salmagundi on the back burner, but mostly I've been playing pattern matching games on shockwave and arcadetown.

Here's a couple of things that have happened that I meant to post earlier.

My Canberra Times connection is continuing. Although the regular reviewer who I was replacing is now back, I am still going to do a review now and then. The Wednesday Food & Wine section has gone larger and glossy, and there's a new Saturday food section in the back of Panorama. I'm now writing a column, called "The Find", for that section. It's about good things that can be eaten in the cafes and takeaways of the Canberra region. I've done porridge and pies so far. All suggestions gratefully received! What's your favourite cafe, and why?

In town, there's now two specialty tea shops in the Canberra Centre, now there's a T2 outlet upstairs in the older part near Socrates. And sadly, Zambrero didn't last in Civic. I'm not surprised, it always seemed to be empty. The one in Braddon opposite Debacle is still open, though.

I have added a new find to my blog list. I think I have a recipe for that... is another food blog written by a Canberran. Excellent! The more of us, the better. Welcome, Krissy!

I'm still not cooking much, though I am planning a macaroni & cauliflower cheese for tonight. I started making it on Friday, but had to go lie down after I got the pasta & cauli cooked, and I didn't get round to the white sauce part. If you are fond of both mac'n'cheese and cauliflower cheese, try this. The combo is even better, in my opinion. And you can reduce the fat (if that bothers you) by using skim milk & cornflour rather then whole milk and a roux. And then, smaller amounts of very tasty cheese is better than lots of mild cheese, and infusing the milk with onion & bay leaf will also help the flavour. I sometimes do half milk and and half chicken stock.

On the menu this week

2008-07-07T20:23:00.003+10:00

As I mentioned, I haven't been well, so not fully together where it comes to doing the shopping and cooking. I saw the doc this morning, and it turns out that I've had a viral encephalitis, which sounds very scary, but is actually very common not serious, and definitely not at all the more famous kind of encephalitis.

So, lacking energy and brain, I've defrosted some chilli for the week. We can have it with baked potatoes and salads, tonight and one other day. We ate out on Saturday night for a Find column, and we'll eat out one more night for a review. And last night I made a simple arrabbiata pasta, which took about half an hour from start to finish.

An arrabbiata is nothing to do with Arabia; it's often got bacon in it, for one thing. The name means disturbed or angry, and it refers to the chilli content. My version is just one of those easy throw together kinds that you pretty much can't go wrong with. A vegetarian version is common, too, but I nearly always do a ham or bacon one.

Recipe: Arrabbiata Pasta Sauce
4 rashers shortcut bacon
1 large onion
4 cloves garlic
2 long green chillies
6 roast tomatoes
1 tsp oregano
1/2 tsp black pepper
short pasta

Chop the rind and fat off the bacon, and fry that to render some fat out. Remove any solids from the pan, then add the chopped onion. Chop the lean bacon, and mince the garlic and chilli, and add that in to the pan when the onion is starting to turn golden. Fry all for a couple of minutes more, then add the skinned and chopped tomatoes, and the oregano and pepper. Simmer for 15-20 minutes - just while the pasta cooks is fine. Serve with pasta and a green salad or vegetable.

Notes: Makes enough for 4 servings. I use sambal oelek if I have no fresh chillies on hand, and of course a tin of diced tomatoes will do if you don't tend to have roast ones on hand. I kept this one fairly pure because I was using yummy Poachers Pantry smoked bacon and wanted that flavour to dominate, but otherwise a few more herbs and a splash of balsamic or wine won't hurt. Maybe some olives or mushrooms. Feel free to tweak it to taste.

Cairns Food Report

2008-07-06T19:36:00.013+10:00

Well, I promised so I'd better get to it before I forget. This week has been a bit problematic for blogging - apart from writing for the paper, and trying to go back to work, I've also been unwell. Some kind of virus, probably - headaches & exhaustion. As I settle back into routine I should do better. Maybe even get another internet salmagundi up.

Anyway, four of us went to Cairns, and stayed in a small apartment in a resort complex. In between lounging about, soaking in the spa, lazing around and chilling out, we also managed a few activities and a few meals. On Sunday we went to Rusty's Markets in town, and spent up big on fruit. We came back to our resort apartment with pomelo, pineapple, passionfruit, custard apple, dragonfruit, bananas, starfruit, black sapote, pink papaya and limes, all very cheaply. We also bought a few cookies, a big bunch of flowers, and some shiny things - the Sunday market features some craft stalls, too. I picked up a freshwater pearl ring, little abalone shell earrings and some purple shell earrings for $5 a piece.

We had Sunday dinner with my family and a guest of theirs, at Tamarind restaurant. This place is in the casino downtown, but it's nevertheless tasteful. Lot of warm brown wood and bamboo decor, and a menu of modern Oz/Asian fusion. In typical Cairns fashion it's a little too air-conditioned, so I was very glad I had my purple pashmina (from Darjeeling, part of last year's Bhutan trip). The food and service were terrific; and I recommend it to anyone who wants a high end meal out in Cairns.

I had a tasting entree plate, a spatchcock with black rice, and a kaffir lime scented creme brulee. The mixed entree plate ($21) here has a coconut battered prawn, a vietnamese vegetable ricepaper roll, a scallop with nashi, lychee and watercress salad, and an oxtail consommé with enoki mushrooms. The consommé was wonderfully rich, with shreds of meat at the bottom; and was my favourite of the set. For a main course, I had the crispy skinned lemon glazed spatchcock with roasted chilli and coconut salad, and black rice ($34). Imagine if lemon chicken could be transmogrified from a cheap Chinese restaurant standard into excellence... I don't remember what everyone else had for mains, but the bloke had a braised Angus beef cheek red curry, which was a huge serving. We had some mixed asian greens, as well, beautifully crisp.

Desserts were a must for some of us, although the bloke was so full from his red curry that he even passed up the cheese plate. I went for the kaffir lime creme brulee with peanut wafers ($12), while some others picked the waiter's recommendation of the iced hazelnut and cassia souffle with frangelico cream. I was quite glad I didn't, as it was very rich. I didn't finish my brulee, either, but the sharp lime tang was very refreshing.

The next day we had lunch at Far Horizons, in Palm Cove, which is where the top photo comes from. The food was lovely, and the place has a great outlook through palm trees out to the beach, but the service was rather slow. I had a very good marinara pasta, and shared a papaya risotto dessert with Belinda. Mmmm, glorified rice pudding.

So we were off to a great start. We ate a lot of the fruit during the week. The black sapote, which is also called chocolate pudding fruit, was good with coffee blossom honey and greek yoghurt. It's not actually chocolatey in taste, it's the colour and texture that gives it the name. I especially love this coffee blossom honey, it's very dark and strong and waxy, and comes from Jaques coffee plantation up on the Atherton tableland. We didn't go there, my sister got it for me specially, so thanks, Gill!

We also ate at the German sausage shop in Kuranda, where we had lunch and pints of a light, refreshing Swiss honey beer, before browsing the markets and the aviary. I had an icecream from the famous tropical fruit icecream cart, but was not a little disappointed with the lumpy icy texture of the macadamia and tropical flavours that I tried. I'm sure it was better when I was there two years ago. Dolce & Gelato in town did a lot better at the tropical fruit flavours - their passionfruit and dragonfruit were really great, and so was the dark chocolate and jersey caramel.

The cafe in the Botanic Gardens was a lovely spot for lunch. Several of us tried their special seafood pie, which was fresh baked, piping hot with a creamy filling of scallops and prawns in mornay sauce. Sadly the pastry was underdone, and the coffee was weak - which seems to be normal in Cairns - but it's a nice place anyway; I'd go back. We also got excellent Thai takeaway from the Banana Leaf restaurant in the city. We had melt in the mouth grain fed steaks at the Bull Bar. Mostly we avoided the esplanade, as rather too backpacker-laden and overpriced, though we did try a couple of the cafes and found them, umm, unspecial. And with weak coffee.

But on our last night we took my sister's advice again for the Raw Prawn, which is on the esplanade, and although pricy it's also pretty good. I had a very pleasant cream soup, that was supposed to be a chowder, and a barramundi fillet with asparagus, guacamole and kipfler potatoes. But unfortunately I got a nasty headache and had to leave - so no dessert for me :( Maybe next time.

Green Chilli Turkey

2008-07-02T22:59:00.003+10:00

Well, I'm back, but pretty busy with work, music, and other writing. There's a few changes coming up at the Canberra Times that I need to work on, and my singing teacher's got a studio concert on Friday. I haven't even got my Cairns report started yet. I'll do it on the weekend, honest, guv.

Meanwhile, we've been eating some good old sausage and mash, and this green chilli turkey. I got the recipe from a Frugal Gourmet book that I bought in the US, way back in 1990 or so. The hardest thing about it is actually finding a turkey hindquarter. Supermarkets seem not to stock them anymore, in favour of either those "marinated" boneless turkey thigh roasts, or turkey thigh chops or mince. I used a frozen "self-basting" one, that I found in a poultry place at Belco markets. Fresh ones require pre-ordering from specialist poultry shops, it seems. Anyway, it didn't taste noticeably chemical after its treatment, so that was OK, but I wouldn't like to try it with the marinated roasts.

This is another American "BBQ" recipe along the lines of the Carolina Pulled Pork - a very slow cooked meat, shredded. We had it one night with coleslaw and bread rolls, and another night with rice and broccoli. I'm not 100% happy with it - it's very tasty, but it looks quite unappetising, what with the greyish brownish greenish colour and the shreds. I might try the red chilli version sometime. And perhaps add tomatoes. Red always looks better, unless it's a traffic light.

Recipe: Green Chilli Turkey
8 long green chillies
4 cloves garlic
1 tsp oregano
1 scant tsp salt
300ml water
300ml chicken stock
1 turkey hindquarter
a dash of vegetable oil
Place everything except turkey, stock and oil in a blender and liquidise thoroughly. Skin the turkey and scrape off any obvious large bits of fat. Lightly brown the turkey in the oil.
Transfer to a pot for slow cooking. Pour over the stock and the green chilli liquid, and slow cook covered, on high for four hours.

Let cool, then shred the turkey meat - it will fall off the bone, and pull apart easily in your hands. Strain the liquid to make sure there's no bones left in it, then mix it back in with the turkey meat. Chill and defat it, if you want to, and just reheat when you want to eat it. The stock will gel.

Notes:Obviously, use more or less chilli to taste. I used the big long green ones, which are quite mild, and wish I'd used more. Also, you could slow cook on low for longer, it's pretty forgiving. Use a big heavy covered casserole in a 140C oven if you don't have a slow cooker. Then you could do the browning in the same pot, and save washing a frying pan.

Bisy, backson

2008-06-20T16:25:00.004+10:00

We're off to Cairns for a bit of sun and snorkelling and all that jazz. I'm taking a week off the computer, so there probably won't be any updates until early July. Bye!

Zierholz Brewery

2008-06-19T13:27:00.007+10:00

Last night the cook and I went out to Zierholz brewery with a bunch of the Slow Food group. While I'm not really a member of the Slow Food group I really couldn't pass up an opportunity to visit Zierholz.

For those who don't know Zierholz is a small brewery that . . . .

. . . started up in Canberra a couple of years ago by Christoph Zierholz . He got into brewing by starting as a home brewer and then took the brave leap into a commercial setup. He's pretty adventurous. While most of us start home-brew with kits, then move into extract and experiment with grains. It sounds like he started with extract and leapt to all-grain mashes and boiling. Brave man!

The idea of the visit was that Christoph would give us a small talk describing the brewing process while showing us the brewery. We would then taste some of his beers.

I've been doing a little research into brewing lately. There is a lot of information out there on brewing and it can be a bit difficult to separate theory from myth from experimental fact. My latest, greatest read is "Designing Great Beers" . It's a brilliant book that contains vast amounts of information if you want to approach brewing from a more scientific point of view. It goes into great detail on methods and beer styles and beer history. Someone should start a one semester Uni course using it as a text book. . . .

. . anyway where was I before I got carried away. Ah yes. Reading the book provides lots of information but it was better to have Christoph show us through the brewery and explain each step in the brewing process. He told us what was done and why and some of the history. It really made the theory bloom in front of my eyes. Christoph knows all the theory and has a very pragmatic approach. Just brilliant. I had some of my pet theories confirmed (e.g. don't ferment over 18C) and unfortunately my fears confirmed (e.g. brewing from extract is OK but it's like making instant coffee).

So even before the beer the trip was well worth it. But then, of course, there was beer :)

The beers we tasted were: Schank, German Ale, Hopmeister, Pils, Weizen, Brown Ale and Porter.

They are all good beer although my tastes really run toward the hoppy and darker beers. I would like to be able to do the beers justice but I don't think my beer palate and vocabulary are up to beer tasting standards however I'll give it a go.

Schank: A very light beer. Somewhat hoppy. Very little malt taste
German Ale: This is the one I have tasted before. This in many ways is a reasonably generic beer. Something that most people (who like beer) would drink happily. As such it is not a stand-out from the rest but it's still very drinkable.
Hopmeister: Sort of like the German Ale with more hops. That means I liked it more.
Pils: Noticeable hops and somewhat sweet. This is a very tasty drop. This is the sort of beer that I would drink through the warmer weather.
Weizen: Don't ask me I'm just not a fan of wheat beer.
Brown Ale: Somewhat reminiscent of Newcastle Brown Ale but superior. This has a slightly nutty flavour and is full bodied. Not really hoppy.
Porter: One of the best porters I've tasted. Porter is a very wide church of a beer. It even used to include Stout. A lot of porters have a very rich malt taste. So rich it seems to overpower the other tastes in the beer. This doesn't do that. This is a very even beer that spreads all the tastes out. It's slightly biscuity, a bit caramelly and of course you can taste the malt. If anyone likes stout or porter and gets a chance to drink some of this don't let the opportunity pass you by.

So after tasting a beer or two we wandered home. Or, more accurately, the designated driving Cook drove me home. It's a hard life.

If anyone is interesting in trying these beers and is in Canberra Zierholz is opening a cafe. So it's worth dropping in. I'm planning on it and I suspect Canberra taxi's know how to find Fyshwick.

At this point I should add that I have no interest in Zierholz past the point that I love good beer :)

The Bloke

Beef Bourguignon

2008-06-17T20:56:00.001+10:00

Beef Bourguignon is good stuff, especially if you take the trouble to make it properly. It's a stew fit for a dinner party, rich and savoury, and it gets better with a rest overnight and reheating. But it's not really fit for photography, because it's basically just brown. I made enough for three meals, and we've had it with mixed broccoli and cauliflower on the side, and some toasted sourdough bread one night, and pumpkin mash another.

I used Julia Child's recipe from Mastering the Art of French Cooking, with some modifications. I revisited this cookbook a while ago, when the Julie/Julia Project was in full swing. I loved Julie Powell's blog - she took on the amazing task of cooking every single recipe in that book in the space of a year. As she put it, "365 days. 536 recipes. One girl and a crappy outer borough kitchen." Did she make it? Read the blog. Although it was 2002/3, so you can find out quite quickly.

Julie's first go at this dish was not a success. But she persevered, and the second time worked fine. I simplified. There are whole chunks of the routine that I skipped - no boiling bacon, because I didn't have a whole chunk, just slices. No salt, because the bacon is salty enough. And after going to all the trouble of getting the meat right, I could not be bothered to cook the onions and mushrooms separately. I just chucked them in late in the cooking process. Nor did I bother skimming and straining and reducing the sauce. It worked fine. I really do think that the critical thing is the startup, so I put the effort in to that section.

Recipe follows:
Recipe: Beef Bourguignon
180g good streaky bacon
1 tbsp olive oil
1 kg trimmed weight stewing beef
1 onion
30g plain flour
750ml red wine
500ml rich beef stock or consomme
pepper, rosemary, 1/2 tsp thyme, 2 bay leaves
1 tbsp tomato paste
4 cloves garlic, crushed
18 shallots or pickling onions
400g white mushrooms
Preheat the oven to 220C.

Trim the large chunks of fat and rind from the bacon. Toss them in a deep fireproof casserole dish with the olive oil, and fry gently to render down the fat. Meanwhile, slice the bacon into small strips, and chop the onion. When the fat is rendered, remove the solids and discard, and add the bacon strips. Brown lightly, for 2-3 minutes, then remove to a bowl.

Brown the meat in the bacon fat, a handful at a time, removing to the bowl when nicely browned on all sides. Don't cover the base of the pan with meat, you don't want the fat to cool down too much and the juices to come out.

Add the sliced onion to the pan to brown. Remove pan from heat, pour out any remaining large pools of fat, then return the meat and bacon. Sift over the flour and toss through. Put the open casserole dish in the oven for 4 minutes, then remove, stir well, and return for an additional 4 minutes. This browns the flour and lightly crusts the beef.

Reduce oven heat to 150C. Pour over the wine and stock to cover the meat. Add the tomato paste, garlic, and herbs. Bring to a simmer, then cover and place in the oven for two hours. Check it to make sure it doesn't go above a simmer; reduce heat if necessary. Add the peeled whole shallots and the mushrooms, and continue to simmer for another hour.

When the meat is tender and vegetables are cooked, bring the casserole to the stove top. Adjust the gravy to your taste - simply simmer uncovered for a while to reduce the sauce down, or add extra wine if it's too thick.

Notes: I used Campbell's Real Consomme in a tetra pack, and a superior quality cask wine. You don't want to go too cheap and nasty with this; the wine is a major ingredient, but don't use the $50 a bottle version either. Also, I doubled the garlic and herb quantities that Julia Child uses, and added a sprig of rosemary.

The Strangest Meal

2008-06-14T21:16:00.003+10:00

I thought a bread roll with sharp cheese, and a large bowl of steamed brussels sprouts with plenty of pepper and malt vinegar would be the weirdest dinner I ate while the bloke's away. But I topped it tonight.

Bacon fat and grapefruit.

Honest. I've been making a fairly proper boeuf bourguignonne, in honour of the bloke's return. To do that you need to render down the fat off a goodly quantity of bacon, and use that fat to brown the beef. So you have to scrape the cooked bits out of the pan, leaving the liquid fat behind, and, well, some of them have gone all brown and crispy, and, well, how could you throw out those little crunchy morsels of deliciousness? It can't be done.

And the grapefruit salad needed finishing. It was a little past its best, but still nice and sharp and clean. I didn't exactly need much dinner, since I had a stonkeringly huge and delicious lunch today at Poachers' Pantry.

How to (not) get a UK visa

2008-06-13T21:17:00.001+10:00

Like many Australians, I have family roots in the UK. My mother is actually still a British citizen, which entitles me officially to a "Certificate of Entitlement to the Right of Abode" in the UK. I've had one of these in my passport, ever since I got my very first passport. I've never actually lived there, but it does give me the right to stand in the shorter queues at Heathrow, and it's kind of cool to think that I could just pick up and move to the UK any time I want.

Now I've renewed my passport (one of my 101-1001 goals), it seemed only sensible to renew that bit of paperwork, too. Here's how it worked for me. I'll also give you 1998 for a comparison.

The Procedure, 1998
* Take old and new passports to UK High Commission.
* Wait in waiting room for 15 minutes.
* Helpful gentleman at counter says "Oh, a renewal. No fee then, love."
* He puts a new sticker in my passport, stamps and signs it, and I'm on my way.

The Procedure, 2008
* Take old and new passports to UK High Commission.
* Discover from gate guard that they've moved the visa office out to Brindabella Park.
* Ask the gate guard for directions, discover that he's so new to Canberra he doesn't even know where he is himself. Commonwealth Avenue is a mystery to him.
* Go home, check on the website.
* Discover that there's a whole mass of forms available there, and the new procedure is to fill them out first and take them in.
* Fill out lengthy online forms, including the funky bit where I say I'm not a terrorist. This is really deep security, because of course terrorists would never lie.
* Print forms, sign them, acquire photo.
* Worry a little that it's the wrong from, because it's an application, not a renewal form.
* Following instructions on the website to take paperwork to visa office, drive out to Brindabella Park in their posted opening hours.
* Be informed by security that they will see nobody without an appointment, and no, I can't make one from there.
* Go back home. Search website for contact to make appointment. Find none.
* Call High Commission, select option for visas, get recorded message telling me to go to the website.
* Select option to return to menu and get operator. Call times out on hold.
* Call again to get operator; get through. Am given 1-300 number to call.
* Call the 1-300 number, get recorded message saying this call will be charged at $9.90, have credit card ready.
* Roll eyes, swear, fetch credit card. Plenty of time to do this as I'm on hold for 15 minutes.
* Speak to intensely polite call centre person who responds not an iota to my mildly expressed frustration. (And it was mild and friendly, I'm not stupid!)
* During conversation, learn that I have filled out the right form. There is no renewal form; you have to reapply every time now. And it costs $486.
* Try to make appointment. None is available on the day, so I try for next Friday, a full week away. She offers me 9.00am.
* Knowing how unbelievably awful the traffic to BBP is, I ask for a later one, such as 10am. There are none. It's 9am or 9.15 am. I settle for 9.15am.

That's where I'm up to. Who knows what might happen at 9.15am next Friday? But one thing that might happen is that I stand them up. After all, I can't call to cancel the appointment without paying another $10 for the privilege. And this new procedure means that there's no great advantage to me doing it now. If I ever do decide to move to the UK, I can deal with the bureaucracy then. Should I pay close to $500 for an idle sense of freedom to move somewhere that I don't really want to live, and shorter queues at Heathrow immigration? Perhaps not.