Mrs. K

Sometimes I take things too far

2009-07-19T20:43:00.003-04:00

My daughter and I were at Legal Seafoods on Friday and a woman and her 20-something daughter sat right next to us- they were actually so cute together. When the daughter left for the bathroom, I had to interrupt her- I knew she'd be cool, she was wearing a banana clip of all things! Remember those?

Anyways, I asked her if she always had that relationship with her daughter and her answer was yes. We had a brief conversation - I expressed my fears of the terrible teens and she said she never experienced this with any of her daughters. Her advice? NEVER STOP KISSING AND HUGGING THEM. Never. EVER. And they will stay connected to you.

What this woman didn't know was my way obsessive compulsive tendencies and all weekend I've been snuggling with J, hugging and kissing her until in an attempt to be funny, I nearly crushed her (she asked me to snuggle on her lap like she does with me).

She didn't want to snuggle any more but by tomorrow I'm sure she'll forget and I can go back to smothering her with love.

I have been talking to her and making her 'aware' of the consequences of hanging out with the wrong crowd, the piercings she's allowed to have (2 and she already has them- am I the only one who dreams with her kid coming home with those big gaping holes in her ears "Tribal" style?), etc.

I even told her if she got a tattoo my heart would stop beating and I would die- and her face? She totally bought it because she came over to me, hugged me and said, she would never kill me- you SEE?? I take things too far!!! But all I want is for my sweet kid to remain sweet- of course even with purple hair I'd still love her.

I just wonder, what's the magic formula to prevent an ornery kid? Do you have one? Care to share it?

Don't forget to enter the Giveaway! (And SMB you got your 4 entries honey- and ps- I don't have a dog but do need gardening to be done!) ;)

Harry Potter Review

2009-07-17T22:07:00.007-04:00

My daughter's never been into Harry Potter. But she said she wanted to go see this one. Hmmm. This is her face after I told her I'd take her (of note, she's already concerned that her hair was messy and she was wearing her specs- I had to beg her to stay as is):

I think it's because she's starting to notice boys but she denies this- there was one boy early this summer who brought her flowers and origami animals to camp. She hated this attention and her stories of avoidance had me laughing all afternoon. He is Chinese. She says he was way shorter than her (welcome to life as a tall person) and just didn't think he was cute- I thought he was adorable...and then I reminded her how much she loves Chicken Fried Rice and to get us an invite to his house and maybe we'd have a good meal on a weeknight (I'm sorry but this girl is going to have to marry a Chef, someone who likes to cook or a rich guy who will cook for her because all I'm teaching her is how to bake and clearly, she cannot live on flour alone). She didn't think that was funny- what? How many times have people come to my house and requested a Spanish meal? PLENTY I tell you.

So anyways, back to HP and his posse. First I would have to say Harry needs some triming on those brows- they bugged me through the whole movie- but J? She was totally digging the romances that were brewing. See?

No- HP is not into that guy just showing you the brows- Harry likes the redhead's sister, and the cute girl likes the redhead (I'm assuming I"m not giving anything away since it's part of the book). So J kept asking when they would go back to the romantic parts. Girl chases boy who doesn't notice her. Boy wants girl but invites someone else to the dance. Just what I want my girl to learn. When we left I told her to make sure she always goes for the nice guys; for the guys who bring her flowers, origami, etc. Not the ones that make you cry.

But anyways, overall, it was entertaining (and had some good lessons in there- such as if you find a spell book with all the answers, don't give it away and if something REALLY scary flies around your house, it's best to stay indoors unless of course they blow the house up). I've never read the books because well, they are not chick lit and wizards and magic wands are not really my thing. But it kept me interested- at first I had to IM my sister who is a total HP follower and ask who was who and once filled in, I was good to go.

Trying to figure out what to go see next...any ideas? I saw Bruno and just don't even waste your time.

And don't forget about the GIVEAWAY!!

Giveaway- NEOCUTIS Lumiere Eye Cream- A MUST HAVE!

2009-07-16T06:00:00.004-04:00

I've been so excited about this giveaway! Let me tell you a short story:

When I went to our club's 4th of July party, my tennis team cornered me and asked how old I truly was. I asked what the guesses were and the guesses were in the range from 28 to 31. My jaw dropped because seriously these women are all my age, they looked good and they thought I was THAT young? Nah...but it was true (now I really think I look my age but they kept saying but you have NO WRINKLES!).

Well I told them my 'secret' and now I'm sharing it with you (and funny enough by the time we had the next practice, they all told me that they had gone and purchased this product because they wanted my skin but not to wear it like last year's Versace-ba da boom).

For the last few months, I've been using the NEOCUTIS skin care line and I've fallen in love with their products- Lumiere (the eye cream) has been one of my favorites and I say one because I truly cannot discriminate against the Blanche or the Bio-Restorative Skin Cream with PSP. But the lack of all the lines around my eyes with all the sun beating we get, is what the girls could not believe and I wish I had before/after pictures but when my girl at the Dermatologist office gave me this product to try, I was sold the first time I used it (and let me tell you I was so upset to have spent $90 to $120 on other creams that did NOTHING-to the point I saw someone was giving it away and quickly turned my nose at it-not worth it for me).

I'm not going to lie- I feel I have some lines, but now they are so faint in comparison to what they were I have no complaints- so this, my friends, is my fountain of youth. If you're in your 20s, now is your time to start taking care of your skin! I mean, I grew up on a beach- with baby oil as my 'sunscreen'. Skin care is the one thing I wish I had listened to others about!

Here's a Before/After shot (not my eye) of the results you can accomplish:

And now, the kind folks at NEOCUTIS have allowed me to share this with you! (I'm not getting paid for this- I simply contacted them to say "I so love your product, I want to share it with blogworld - may I?" and they gladly said yes which makes me love them even more!)

And now, this little baby can be yours (SRP $75), for FREE!!! with a click of a button.

Here are the rules:

This giveaway runs from today until 3pm EST Thursday, July 23. The winner will be chosen by random.org and contacted by Friday morning. If the winner does not respond within 24 hours, a second winner will be chosen. Unfortunately, I can only accept U.S mailing addresses at this time. Ok, the not so fine print:

{entries - maximum of four}

every comment must include an email address - it's ok if you comment with your blog account as long as I can get to your email through your blog!

{leave a separate comment for each entry!}

leave a comment- 1 entry
Blog about the giveaway with a link back to me (and please let me know you're passing it forward)- 1 entry
Twitter about the giveaway- 1 entry (again must let me know)
Become a Follower (see that link on the right sidebar? click it!)- 1 entry (if you're already a follower, that counts too, so you get two entries!! just remind me please)
The product will come to you directly from the manufacturer so it's imperative I get everything correct in one shot after I contact you (name, address and phone number for shipping purposes).

That's it folks...good luck!

Now it's "Kate's turn" video AND THE WINNERS ARE....

2009-07-15T16:30:00.000-04:00

Kate Gosselin Match.com Profile Video - watch more funny videos

Of course this is a spoof as was the other one...brought to you by funnyordie.com.

Ok the winners! (I am SO DYING TO GET TO THE NEW GIVEAWAY I figured I needed to just move this one along since I know you guys want to move to the new one also) - I went to random.org and here is what it said-I can't figure out how to take the little picture of it to put it on here but will have it down pat by next week. And pls do bear with me here- I'm getting started with this so figuring out logistics was like- flying by the seat of my pants. But the next one? everything is laid out for you so without furder ado...

The winners are:

Love the One You're With-Paula from Sweet Pea (#11)

Chelsea Handler Book- Jenn from Life at Twenty Something! (#9)

LA Candy- Small Town Girl! (#17)

Congrats! Please send me your address via email and will get these out to you shortly.

Now I have to do this other giveaway starting tomorrow morning- so stay tuned!! you are not going to want to miss it! (seriously)

And just wait until you hear what happened at tennis today. Let's just say, I haven't wanted to eat much today.

Stay tuned

2009-07-15T11:56:00.003-04:00

I just scored a great giveaway for you readers- it will start tomorrow night.

Ladies, you're going to LOVE it- and it's something REALLY good!! If you follow Jillian, it has something to do with what she's been writing about...you ask and you shall receive!! Right?

Stay tuned!

Battle of the bulge..again

2009-07-14T09:39:00.000-04:00

Ok so what I've been up to-other than planning this Giveaway! (remember you must be a 'follower' and that is achieved by clicking on the link right there------> )

Friday was my first day on my no artificial sugar kick (as in no candy, no sodas, you know the drill). No worries, I'm still going to have stuff- just not for the next two weeks and then after that, if I developed some self control, I will allow myself a bite here and there or just one day a week. So how did it go?

Well I slept for most of Friday so I would say it went ok since I was not awake long enough to crave any sweets. I simply could not muster any energy to do squat. I was dead. G laughed at me and told me to have a soda...nice support system I got. But I didn't- I'm hell bent on doing this.

Saturday was hell part 2, because I had a headache the whole day- so I stayed in bed and read. I literally finished two books.

G made fun of me (again) because I looked and talked like a lethargic fool all day. Seriously I made no sense and when I tried to sound smart, I forgot what my point was. If you realize, I totally misdated the giveaway the first time around. (Thursday July 12)

At one point I sat down and realized I was having chocolate, cake, twizzlers, chuckles, ANYTHING at least once a day. If I played tennis, I would allow myself two sweets as a reward. See how nice I am to myself?

Amazing what starting your day with a large diet coke does to you, and then have a couple more during the day to keep you going. And amazing what the after lunch sugar rush does as well. It has been an awakening (no pun intended) but I'm going to try this for at least two weeks to see if I can break the 'must have something sweet' habit. I am drinking iced tea with splenda- but figured that a) I can't drink tea without it tasting sweet and one splenda a day is not going to kill me.

Ok dont forget to enter the Giveaway...I'll be doing the drawing soon and after that? Another one! I have three other books to give away and a FREE mag subscription to a really cool magazine I found! (you see, I'm going to subscribe and they are giving me two for the price of one so I'm giving one to you!)- I'm telling you I have been a reading maniac and the lack of sugar has apparently made me nicer- nice enough to want to share; and I don't do that often.

So take advantage of these offers before I have a piece of chocolate and turn into a greedy monster again.

Summer Reading & Giveaway(s)!!!

2009-07-11T14:06:00.008-04:00

If you knew what I was up to, you'd realize why I'm reading so much...so far, I've finished:

This was a great read...I love the Emily Giffin series. The main character (Ellen) seems to have a perfect life, but when Leo comes back into her life, well, things are thrown for a loop. I couldn't put it down.

Then I read this:
Funny and somewhat crude- which is what Chelsea Handler is all about. She writes about all her one-night stands, her 'relationships' all in a funny style- but you gotta be into that kind of stuff. I told G about it because he heard me laughing out loud and even he picked it up and was laughing. So it's not for the faint of heart. But it was funny.

And now? I'm ashamed to say I'm reading this:
The most embarassing part about it is that I was looking for it and ended up asking the clerk and she took me to the 'teen' area where it had a huge display. Sigh. My immaturity is confirmed once again but since I loved watching The Hills, I had to pick this up. So far, so good.

So I've decided to give away these three books. I don't know the technicalities since I'm not a giveaway person- I'm often very clingy when it comes to my stuff. I guess just leave a comment with the book of your choice? and/or send me an email? And if you refer someone in you get two entries? Is that how it goes?

Oh...and you have to be a follower...that I read from everyone- it's only fair!! Will take 'entries' until....hmmm...Wednesday July 15th- that seems like a good time. Right?

Good luck!

wow I feel so official.

Facebook Manners

2009-07-10T16:57:00.001-04:00

OMG I want so squeeze these babies!!

2009-07-09T22:37:00.001-04:00

I don't know how I feel yet

2009-07-08T14:20:00.000-04:00

Let's face it- I'm a sucker for anything new that promises something. I miss the Orange Glow guy. Anyways, I've been seeing this in Walgreens for a while now and it claims to remove whatever hair- arms, legs, face and finally I bought the stupid thing. It's called Smooth Away and it sells for under ten bucks.

Because it claimed to remove *any* unwanted hair with no pain, I first went to G and asked him to let me use it on him because he does hair removal often. The instructions said to go in 3 circular motions one way, and then 3 the other way and voila.

I did 3 and 3 and nothing. Then 6 and 6 and nothing. Then I went for 10 and G started screaming. It did nothing for his hair except start a fire in a small area of his chest...so even though it was unwanted hair, this product did not work on him. All this did was leave sandpaper dust on his chest with a burning sensation.

Because I was not willing to let this go yet I decided to try it on my face. Yes I wax two spots around my lips- I'm latin what do you want!? And lo and behold it worked. But I did this like 20 minutes ago and it *still* feels as though I sandpapered my face and it's sore. Maybe because after I was done I sat there and inspected the 'paper' and I think it IS indeed the finest sandpaper you can buy. I know this because I had some in our garage, compared the two and couldn't find a difference. I was shocked...treating me like a piece of wood?

The verdict? It works on 'virgin' hair or very fine hair just fine. I guess it would be ideal for a girl who is ready to start shaving...but on hair that's been shaven or waxed for a while? forget it. But don't go out in the sun- during my tennis match between the sweat, the sunscreen and the heat, guess what part of my face started to sting like a mofo? and I ended up with a red mustache to boot (which is gone now by the way).

And expect good exfoliation out of it if you use it...instead of spending $10 on those pedi eggs (love those), I may just go buy the rough sandpaper and try it on my feet. I knew Home Depot rocked, now it may be the home for all my beauty needs!

Please let's move on....

2009-07-07T15:12:00.004-04:00

At the risk of getting hate mail, I'm just going to put this out there because I'm just sick of it all...I came home after my tennis match, exhausted, wanting some r & r and turn the tv on. Saw some woman talking on the MJ memorial and saying 'I salute you MJ' and doing the armed forces salute...but excuse me? Other than wearing jackets that looked 'official' and medals on those jackets to perfect his 'look'- why does he deserve that salute?

I admit he had a lot of musical hits, great talent and was part of music history; I was a heavy MJ follower in the early 80s- I mean who didn't know 'Thriller', or try to replicate that dance? Never mind, all the other music he created but the man got weird. And he got accused of some pretty ugly stuff and even paid off the families - to me that is somewhat an admission of doing something inappropriate- oh never mind he admitted to sleeping with tons of kids. And we 'salute' him for that? What about all the childhoods he took away from these kids that came forward? Do we salute that also?

Nu uh. What about all the doctors who save lives every day? What about all the Nobel Peace Prize winners? what about all the service men and women who have died for our country? Where is their 24/7 coverage dissecting every little thing about their lives?

Did Mother Theresa get this kind of tribute? Have any of our presidents? or service men? what about people who work at finding cures for diseases? people who make a positive difference in the world? What is it now, 2 weeks of coverage? EVERY day? I'm tired of switching channels.

He's not a flipping hero. Give it up already- Shameful. It's just shameful. I would shut up about all this if let's say, a small, at least minor mention would be said every day for whoever passess away who did good in their life. Just 20 seconds of air time to honor that person. A doctor, a soldier, a volunteer, a person who did good with his/her life...there are many in my community.

How about it?

Ok back to my regularly scheduled rest time- the heat today was 99 degrees. I still feel woozy from playing for two hours in the sun.

Jon Gosselin...looking for love

2009-07-07T06:57:00.000-04:00

tee hee hee

Wanted: full time scratcher person

2009-07-06T15:51:00.002-04:00

Oh my word. I don't know what's going on but the mosquitoes here are driving me INSANE! And apparently I'm the buffet of choice because my legs are itching 24/7!!!

I even went and bought that Skin so Soft from Avon that everyone says works like magic and guess what I got? MORE BITES.

I even had a mosquito near me in the office today and I turned and did a karate move and caught the thing and then my hand? Full of blood. It was gross. Good thing I didn't have any open wounds.

Right now I'm like one of those crazy people who scratches themselves with everything and anything available to me- wall edges, brushes, pencils, pens, forks, and every time my daughter walks by I ask her to help me. She's done helping so I need someone who can do this full time- the shorter you are, the better off you'll be ('cause your back won't hurt).

Any takers?

Baking, blogging, gossiping and resting

2009-07-03T09:17:00.002-04:00

I'm spending my day today baking a cake for tomorrow's BBQ. Fun times.

I found a cake supply store so as soon as my cake is out of the oven, I will head over there to buy some new fondant to cover the thing. Is it wrong to be so excited over cake supplies?

Then, there is this game in facebook called Farm Town that now J and I are addicted to. Losers, I know. No need to put salt in the wound. But I got a super farm and J gets so excited when it's harvesting time. Who knew I could be a 'farmer'? I kill everything I touch so it's nice to see my crops growing.

It's finally not raining here this morning so I'm kinda upset that I have to bake because what I want to do is go to the beach. Maybe I'll hurry up and buy the stuff and then go to the beach afterwards and decorate tonight because G is going to the Hard Rock Casino with some friends. J and I will have a girl's night.

Sangria is already made and just had a taste (I HAD TO) and it's delish.

Boring post, sorry- But I'm trying to hurry up so I can sit down and wait for the cake to be made.

Oh- for you real housewives fans, did you hear the latest?

Gretchen and Slade got married? It's a rumor but there were some wedding photos HERE. I don't know if it's real or not but certainly interesting because wasn't she friends with Jo, his ex-fiance? Just weird.

Then I read the thing that Danielle did to Dina was feed info to her ex-husband so he could take custody of the daughter. That woman is vicious- and I saw her on tv the other day (because I was trying to get away from the MJ coverage- am I the only one sick of it?) bragging about her 110lb, 5 foot 6 body and (I mean who says that to anyone, never mind TV), and admitting she just likes drama. All I know is I'm glad I'm not in her 'circle of friends'. But if I ever go to Jersey, I will have to go to that hair salon! Apparently a lot happens there! ;)

Ok that's it, I smell the cake...yum!

Have a great weekend.

Blackberry Storm review

2009-06-30T20:32:00.002-04:00

Well, the phone got here on Friday at 1pm. I was so pumped to start playing with it, etc., that I told hubby to go out with his friends and I literally spent 3 or 4 hours setting it up, talking to customer service (because once I synched it with my computer, I lost the browser and facebook applications) and so on.

At first, the touch screen was weird but typing on it became a non-issue. But folks, the Storm is already back in the box and headed back to Ontario. Why? well, here's why:

Whenever I put the phone down in the car, or on my table, it went to this format which was then a hassle to get out of especially if a call came in. Never mind that it took 'forever' and a day to get it to reset back to normal.

If you touch the screen in the middle you're fine- but hit 'reply' which is in the bottom corner, you're gonna lose your temper after your 10th attempt. I fiddled with the touch screen to make it the most sensitive and one I didn't have to press so hard but hitting 'reply' or 'send' was a hassle each time. The end result was that I did not text or email ONE person while I had this phone because the frustration that set in was so much I would have thrown it against the wall if I was actually forced to reply to quick text or email.
Also the touch screen only goes as far as your finger goes when you move it up or down- to move sideways in the calendar feature you kinda have to point and drag like you do a mouse. And again, I didn't want to enter anything in my calendar because the "ALT" key is also on the bottom left hand corner and getting to it was a feat in itself. And if you hit space twice by mistake? Created a new sentence. A.ggra.va.ting.
Another major problem I encountered was the use of voice commands. Plain and simple, I could not use it because my memory was full. But how? At 8GB it should not be full at all...but that's the error it would give me time and time again. And I use the voice commands A LOT- so that was another major point against the Storm. Sometimes it would work, others it would tell me memory full. I wanted to tell it where to go.
Facebook was cool, but retrieving a message from it was a pain in the ass...why? button was in the TOP left hand corner...not easy because the screen is just not meant to bend at the corners or click down as a matter of face.
Camera? took nice pics, when it decided to take them, but I'm still wondering how in the heck you could zoom in and out on PURPOSE. It only seemed to do it when I didn't want it.
The one cool feature it had was the voicemail feature- as soon as I got a voicemail instead of dialing in, I could just hit the icon and hit play and it would play it for me. That was neat.
The other features? Word, Excel, Powerpoint, Calendar, Tasks and so on are useless because of the awful keyboard functions. Again- NOT the touch screen- but just reaching to any of the four corners makes it so that you want to rip your hair out.
Finally, this phone was huge and heavy. My Blackberry World Edition is not nearly as thick or heavy as this phone and the difference is noticeable.
The phone got 'frozen' more times than I actually used it which was a huge sign (IMO) of things to come and they weren't going to be getting better.
I had to be on the phone with Customer Service during 3 different occasions and I spent almost 2 hours in one call and the other 2 were about 30 min each. So about 3 hours on the phone trying to get help in trying to fix something or other. Not what I wanted to do.

Bottom line? This phone is awful. Not user friendly, unbelievably frustrating and unless you want to get charged a $35 re-stocking fee, avoid this phone altogether. It was not worth me wasting my Friday night and half of Saturday fighting with it and am glad to be rid of it.

Back to my World Edition Blackberry and once my black cloud leaves my head, I may attempt a go with the iPhone or just wait for Verizon's version of the Blackberry Bold which is actually extremely cool.

Did I do that?

2009-06-30T05:46:00.001-04:00

Remember when I tore my calf muscle back in September? Well last Thursday night I woke up and told G, 'geez my calf feels REALLY tight and knotty almost like it felt the morning of the day I actually tore it'.

G warned me and told me not to play my game that night but I couldn't cancel at the last minute although I did want to cancel.

My game that night was at the *same* place where I tore my calf that fateful night. I was on edge because well, I didn't want anything to happen. I stretched, I did everything right...I swear I did- my calf felt funny throughout the entire first set and I really avoided over reaching for stuff.

And then it happened.

My opponent fell right in front of me and screamed in pain that it felt someone hit her in the calf. She fell the same way I did, said the same thing I did, and as I rushed to help her, I just felt so bad for her. She called me the next morning to thank me for helping her. She had gone to the doctor and he said she had torn her right calf. Same leg.

My calf no longer hurts.

Weird.

PS- I found two rain jackets. J actually already had one from Limited Too that fits her very well and while cleaning the closet I found out G had not one but 2 Nike jackets. So I'm all set.

What to do? What to wear?

2009-06-29T22:16:00.002-04:00

I was invited to a Fourth of July party. One of the girls from my new team is hosting it. This new team is different. They all get along, they go drinking together and once a year they go to a transvestite bar. I think they are too wild for my taste but nevertheless, I was thrilled to be invited to a party!

Me! The newbie! It felt like 4th grade, I swear it did! I asked what I could bring, and in the end I said I'd bring my famous Sangria (has anyone made it yet?). And then anxiety set in.

What am I going to wear? they are arguing over whose volleyball team I will be in but I'm so not the person who enjoys a 'friendly' game of volleyball! Yes I'm a snob about this...but if you don't know how to play, don't ask me to partake (and they all said- we can't play worth a damn but we just play until we pass out)- I'll gladly watch you and even ref the game but I can't play because then...I'll probably twist my ankle or do something stupid trying to get the ball.

So I'm thinking if I wear a dress, I won't be forced to play- right? or maybe lots of jewelry and get fake nails- totally pimp myself out. And then I'll stick out like a sore thumb.

I have mixed feelings about my new team- I'm not crazy about one pro and gosh they (pros) like to yak, yak, yak and waste precious practice time yaking. I like the girls, but I feel like an outsider so I figured this will be great to mesh with them.

I'm going in circles. But here's the thing: I told J about the BBQ and wanna know what her response to me was?:

"Ok mom let's get G's credit card and take you shopping so you can get some stylish outfits for this party...let me pick outfits for you"

What the?I like the credit card thing but I think I dress fine thankyouverymuch but apparently not cool enough for a 9 year old- I guess I should be wearing what Hannah Montana wears since that's what she was pointing me to. Gah.

But I decided just for giggles, I will take her to the mall and see what she means and let her be my stylist for a day...I guess my khakis and polo shirts are not cutting it for her and who knows- maybe I will like it.

What is your style? Mine is mixed but I would say comfortable and classic styles- I don't have any balloon dresses and most fads scare me. Most of my shorts and pants are JCrew. Most of my tops are Banana, JCrew and some Old Navy (pink shirt below is Old Navy).

Someone please help me before I scream and pull my hair out

2009-06-28T21:27:00.002-04:00

For the last two weeks I have traveled high and far trying to find jackets for J and me. Rain jackets/slickers/ rain coats. Whatever you want to name them is fine with me. But everyone is sold out.

I want those that fold into a little thing of nothingness for ease of portability while we travel. Does anyone have any idea where to find these forsaken things?

I need a M/L for J (thinking she'll get more use out of it that way) and I'm a little more difficult because of my shoulders- could be a M or L but probably prefer L. Any help would be appreciated.

My ugly sides- self deprecating post- is that the right spelling?

2009-06-27T16:16:00.006-04:00

I wanted to try and post from my new Storm...but I'm still getting used to the keyboard and my thumbs hurt.

I haven't had a camera phone in a long time so I decided to show you a) my new camera ability(ies), and b) my $45 haircut. I had my appointment with my regular stylist yesterday and I had to cancel, because I lost power and could not get my car out of my garage but I REALLY needed a cut so I called the Regis Salon and the girl who cuts my daughter's hair and off I went on hope and a prayer. And the verdict? It's better than my $125 normal haircut which I put back in a ponytail. And because she did so well, I let her do my eyebrows and she did great as well...too bad you can't tell from the pictures but this is the best I could do with the camera for now (until I figured the damn thing out)

So here's the first shot I took- you see the darn thing has a zoom lens. WHO KNEW a camera phone would have a zoom lens? NOT ME.

Then this is like the 10th picture I try to take but nothing and then:

Can you see the frustration in my face? Yup. I am STILL annoyed.

And then this one took- of course, I had a nice smile and then I finally muttered a word that may or may not have ended with the letter k...and then click

And finally I get a semi-decent pic. Lightning is bad but because I turned on the lights- this camera even has a flash and I was pretty amused by it all...please keep in mind I had to wipe off the sweat once or twice-

Now folks, you have seen my ugly faces at their best. I still don't know how to take a picture- because honestly I don't know how I ever figured out how to take these.

Gonna go relax now.

I've seen it all

2009-06-26T06:53:00.001-04:00

And I thought work was tedious and boring but this week? Not so much. I thought I had seen my fair share of animal lovers do weird things for their pets but this week?

I was minding my own business in my little office (I have windows in all one side and we are on the first floor). Please picture this as I'll try my best to replicate what I saw.

I noticed this woman walking this mastiff. Beautiful dog- I stopped to look at him- apparently he had just pooped because of the baggy she was carrying- I thought what a nice, responsible dog owner! (I knew it was a him because the beast had not been neutered) and then the unthinkable happened.

Woman took cigarette off her mouth onto her left hand, took tissue, put it in her mouth and proceeded to wipe this dog's butt- and not just a quick swipe. A slow, deliberate obviously picking through some crap wipe. And the dog just stood there, staring at me.

Disgusting. It made me gag and I almost made me want to slam the window and say "WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU CRAZY WOMAN!?" So now we call her yes...butt kisser.

Seriously.

Ok I get my phone TODAY!! It is in Fort Liquordale and getting in a truck and making its way to ME!!!

Back to fighting shape and driving those around me crazy

2009-06-24T21:57:00.003-04:00

Yup I conquered the Wii...I'm below my age now (actually 36). I think I may have dislocated a hip or a shoulder, but I did it.

And I was having this massive quandry between an iPhone and a Storm and a little meditation - ok who am I kidding, obsessive, compulsive web surfing, interviewing, and driving people nuts led me to my decision.

Somehow, I got Verizon to give me the Storm for 99.00 (I KNOW!) something to do with me not receiving the right service when I went to the store and then I called and out of the goodness of their heart they credited my account 50 bucks. (I KNOW!) So with that credit, the Storm cost me 99.00 (I KNOW!). So my friendly tech - his name was 'Houston'- which really made me wonder if that was his name but didn't want to push my luck and ask him because I was already going out of my way by being extra cheerful and jovial- assured me that if I wasn't happy with my purchase, I could return it within 30 days and call it a day. He even wrote it in my 'permanent record'! And I know he did because he followed up with an email! (I KNOW!)

So I'm going to try the Storm for a week or two- if I like it, I'll keep it- if I don't, I'll return it and go get an iPhone. Even though I hate AT&T- I don't know why but I just do and that's the main reason why I have refused to give into the iPhone craze. And the iPhone apparently is not top notch in the things I use the most (calendars, tasks, reminders, email, email, and email- you see with the Blackberry email is instantaneous and from what I saw, iPhone is not that quick- because you know, I need to know if I made the tennis roster like, YESTERDAY!) but the iPhone is way ahead of the Storm in other stuff- and it's just cool. So we'll see.

I still like the coolness of the iPhone but I'm hoping the Storm blows me away. It arrives Friday.

Oh why so mean to me?

2009-06-23T06:51:00.002-04:00

Dear Wii Fit,

You didn't have to get all jealous that I purchased the Wii Active...after all, it kicked my butt the very first time- all the while my daughter was behind me laughing at me because some things were 'jiggling'. I told her since she didn't like things that jiggled, that I would be eating all her Jell-O from now on...silence followed.

But anyways you didn't have to be so mean. I know it had been 147 days since I last stepped on that little board but 8 lbs? I have gained 8 lbs? I mean, I was feeling I had gone up a bit because some of my pants were a little tighter and some of my skirts well they felt 'tighter'. But EIGHT? And then, to add insult to injury, you gave me my new wii fit age: 63.

Well, go bite yourself or something. I'll have my wii fit age in the 30s within a week (or two). But for now I hate you for being so mean to me....I have done nothing to you except give you a break.

thanks a lot,

PS- this made me call my friend up who's a little shorter than me but apparently we weigh the same- so we have this contest going on- we weigh in next Saturday (which means I can eat a little more ice cream than usual this week), and whoever has lost the highest percentage by end of August, will win a mani/pedi treatment at the salon of my choice. Yes I will win this one. You bet.

It is downhill from here?

2009-06-20T18:09:00.000-04:00

***Warning NOT for Men***

When I turned 40 I got a call from my gynecologyst. At first, I thought, my what a sensitive office staff to remember my freaking birthday! But no, they were calling me to schedule my baseline mammogram. I have very little in that department and I am afraid it squashed what little I had left. Ladies, consider this my gift to you in preparation to your first or next mammogram because that HURT.

Many women fear their first mammogram, and even if they you had them before, there is the fear. But, there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test, and best of all, you can do these simple practice exercises in the privacy of your home.

EXERCISE 1: Open your refrigerator door, and insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure.
Hold that position for five seconds.
Repeat in case the first time wasn't effective.

EXERCISE 2: Visit your garage at 3 a.m. when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor sideways with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled.
Switch sides, and repeat for the other breast.

EXERCISE 3: Freeze two metal bookends overnight.
Strip to the waist.
Invite a stranger into the room.
Have the stranger press the bookends against either side of one of your breasts and smash the bookends together as hard as he/she can.
Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next year to do it again.

You are now properly prepared! Also, notice ladies:

MENtal illness
MENstrual cramps
MENtal breakdown
MENopause

Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men? And, when we have real problems, it's HISterectomy

Ask me what I did to myself in the last 10 days?

2009-06-18T17:19:00.002-04:00

I'm too embarassed to write about it- so I'll write it really in a different color hoping it just fades away and I can start over again tomorrow; you can highlight to see what I wrote- then you'll know...

I ate two containers of Breyer's Chocolate Chip Ice Cream.

Between the MIL (honestly, I can't even think about speaking about rehab, hips, or bathing one more time because my head will explode- and I know, I know, she has it way worse, but remember, I'm not built for this and so far the only DIL really involved in anything here so I'm EXHAUSTED). And then my new tennis team league started and I'm up to my eyebrows in crap- I've lost 2 games in a row. One was a bad loss, the other one not so bad (tie breaker), but I swear it has to get better because I just don't see improvement...maybe it's all this extra weight I'm hauling around.

I.
Am.
Stressed.

Full Circle

2009-06-16T20:55:00.002-04:00

Discussions with the kid after I picked her up after a very bad weekend at her dad's

#1

J- Dad had a dream that he was living in Hawaii and I was in my 20s coming to visit him.

Me- Hmmm...that's interesting...where was W? (insert name of his wife here)

J- hopefully dead.

Ok, ok, I explained she had to take that back and that we don't wish that on ANYONE. EVER.

#2

J- Mom, can I say the really BAD word? I need to tell you how I feel about Dad's wife!

Me- Hmm...is that the only way you can express yourself? by using the bad word? (obviously I need to do better by watching my foul mouth)

J- Yes, you see, Friday she made me so mad, I finally stood up to myself and was so mad, I went to bed feeling sick to my stomach and felt my face all hot and red. So can I please tell you the really bad word?

Me- (bracing myself) fine

J- She so STUPID! She PISSES ME OFF!!!!

Me- egads!...(I was expecting much worse but thank goodness I didn't get what I thought was coming out which I thought would start with a B or an F)

J- Julie those were TWO words and who did you hear the P word from? So what do you want to do about your stepmom? you want me to do something?

Me- my dad- sorry. (long story short she doesn't want me to interfere right now she wants to solve it her own way- she gave me this long Cinderella type story and it took all I had not to turn around and beat this woman up but as always, I KNEW there had to be two sides to this story- I offered that I'd talk to her dad about altering the visitation somewhat but her response?).....nah.

So fast forward to today, I'm talking to her dad and I finally muster up the courage to tip toe around the subject of my daughter being treated like Cinderella while there- his response? well, after about 1 minute of hysterical laughter he proceeded to tell me what exactly happened. The full story. He admitted his wife and my kid just don't get along and he tries and he hopes at some point they will come to terms (oddly enough they are a few days apart in birthdays - apparently mentally not physically).

So I did get a chuckle at some of the things that J did while there (mostly 'atta girl' chuckles) but we both agreed, our daughter has a flair for drama- we just couldn't agree on whose side of the family it comes from.

Last weekend her dad was telling J funny anecdotes from our first trip to Paris- I thought I had crossed over to the Twilight Zone.

People- we've come full circle. Have I said that before?