The Contemplative Calendar

2009-11-12T04:25:00.002Z

Fortunately, the realm of possibility is not limited to what you believe you can do. It also comprises what you believe you cannot do.

A Daily Offering

2009-11-10T17:48:00.001Z

'My Lord and my God!'
Originally uploaded by eebrierley

My Jesus,
Today I'm Yours
Though I'm far from those eternal Shores
That I call Home--
Sill, while I roam
My heart-strings seem
Interwoven with Your own.

This is who I Am.

2009-11-06T15:31:00.002Z

This is who I Am.
Originally uploaded by eebrierley

"Behold the lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world."

Our catechist, Fr. Tony Nye SJ, from Farm Street Parish, London, recently spoke to us about the real nature of Christ's sacrifice. He said that to see the death of Jesus solely in the context of a sacrificial atonement leads us away from the real meaning of God's Word made flesh.

In the life of Christ, God says to us: 'I would, and I will, die for you. This is who I AM. This is how I love.'

As a Methodist friend recently said to me, "He came among us as the poorest of the poor, so that no one would feel left out."

The simplicity of this statement doesn't lead us away from the point--it leads us right to it! God is simple, and so is His message. What He wanted to show was complete oneness with us--He wanted to get down on our level, and really make Himself understood. In the Old Testament we find a long train of perfect examples of miscommunication, or rather, misunderstanding (on our part). In dying, Christ is at last showing us the Father as He promised to, because it is only by Christ's death that we understand Who God really is.

His death is the consummation of His life, and when He says, 'it is finished,' we at last know the real nature of God--the God Who is Love. Christ is obedient to the will of the Father for our sake: it is only by walking the way of the Cross that Jesus is able to make us understand the depth and breadth of the love of God, a God Who could not do too much for us, Who deigned to walk among us as one of ourselves, a God who is motivated by boundless love, and who is Love itself.

This is who He Who Is, is.

Therese

2009-11-04T19:27:00.001Z

Therese
Originally uploaded by eebrierley

'It is not merely because I have been preserved from mortal sin that I lift up my heart to God in trust and love. I am certain that even if I had on my conscience every imaginable crime, I should lose nothing of my confidence, but would throw myself, my heart broken with sorrow, into the arms of my Saviour. I remember His love for the prodigal son, I have heard His words to St. Mary Magdalen, to the woman taken in adultery, and to the woman of Samaria. No--there is no one who could frighten me, for I know too well what to believe concerning His Mercy and His Love.'

--St. Therese of Lisieux, 'Story of a Soul'

The Contradiction of God...

2009-11-03T21:31:00.002Z

...isn't in His nature, but in our understanding.

'To reach satisfaction in all,
desire its possession in nothing

To come to possess all
desire the possession of nothing.

To arrive at being all
Desire to be nothing.

To come to the knowledge of all
Desire the knowledge of nothing.

To come to the pleasure you have not
You must go by the way you enjoy not.

To come to the knowledge you have not
You must go by the way you know not.

To come to the possession you have not
You must go by a way in which you possess not.

To come to be what you are not
You must go by a way in which you are not.

When you turn toward something
You cease to cast yourself upon all.

For to go from all to the all
You must deny yourself of all in all.

And when you come to the possession of the all
You must possess it without wanting anything.

Because if you desire to have something in all
Your treasure in God is not purely your all.'

--St. John of the Cross, 'Ascent of Mount Carmel'

The Bands of Love

2009-10-23T05:36:00.001+01:00

The Bands of Love
Originally uploaded by eebrierley

"I will draw them with the cords of Adam, and with the bands of love: and I will be to them as one that taketh off the yoke on their jaws..."

Osee 11:4

From the Catholic Shrine of the Immaculate Conception, Atlanta, GA.

The Space in Between: Understanding the Holy Trinity

2009-10-20T20:10:00.002+01:00

I am pretty grateful to my parents for many things, but for one hidden blessing especially--they didn't raise me within the Church, nor did I have the benefit of any real spiritual grounding, except for one precept: Love rules all things, and in all things, be ruled by Love.

Hidden in this simple message was the germination of my salvation, and I thank my parents who, in a roundabout way, have bequeathed to me the period of my catechumenate, which I am presently undergoing, piloted by the spiritual direction of Father Anthony Nye, SJ.

The catechumenate combines many aspects and rites of passage of Catholic life into one concentrated period, as it prepares the candidate for baptism, confirmation, and first Holy Communion. With extensive study and regular prayer one is called to engage daily with their growing faith, and it is a period blessed with many graces, and graced with many trials. I feel I can truly say with St. Therese, that the more I grow in my spiritual life, the clearer my ignorance and gracelessness are to me. How little is my understanding, how desolate and shaken am I in faith by turns--my only grace being, my need of God's grace. How good it is to learn something of God; but how much greater, to glorify His mysteries.

The Catholic faith is nearly two thousand years old and counting, so there are very few new quetions to ask. If there's something you want to know, or can't quite understand, you can be pretty sure that many men and women before you--including the holy saints themselves--have puzzled and pondered over the same things. Our hearts, being the throne of the Holy Spirit within us, often easily confirm what our heads remain long perplexed over. Faith makes the mysteries of God very easy to grasp--but as faith is only the beginning to a fuller communion with God, it is also a springboard to our growing knowledge and understanding of Him.

One of my great perplexities, in head rather than heart, was, of course, the Trinity. This doctrine, half-veiled, half-revealed, by the revelation of the Gospels, and affirmed by the early Church, is our best attempt to understand the true nature of God, as He has revealed Himself to us. I wonder who expected that the immutable, omnipotent, eternal God should be easy to understand--but it doesn't follow that since we cannot know everything, we can know nothing.

I first asked my husband during 'catechism study' time, what does 'Trinity' mean?

My heart understood it perfectly, but my head kept shaking the box of this jigsaw puzzle, trying to make sure that none of the pieces were missing.

For my husband, however, the answer was pretty simple. "Think of water, steam, and ice," he said. "They are three manifestations of the same essence---all the same substance, and all distinct embodiments."

This answer fulfilled my need, at least for a time. I could understand the 'why' of the Trinity--'why' God should be thus in nature, much more so than the 'how.'

My mother herself, when attending as a little girl one of her grandfather's revival-style Baptist services at which he was preaching, asked quite innocently, 'But Papa, how are three one?'

In school, we tend to think of 'one' as the remainder at the end of a problem of subtraction, than as the sum of an addition equation.

Unfortunately the attitude of many preachers, priests and thinkers of various Christian denominations has been lazy evasion. 'It's a mystery,' 'just accept it,' 'we can't understand it.' Some (for example, the Mormons) have been so puzzled in their understanding that they found it easier to disclaim the doctrine altogether, thereby rendering themselves no longer truly Christian.

As a Christian, I find it nobler to glorify God's mysteries than to hope for all the answers. But I have also heard His mysteries, the Trinity in particular--which is the central mystery of our faith--compared to a great museum or gallery. We cannot fathom the number of rooms or masterpieces contained. Our plan of the gallery is incomplete. But simply saying, 'it's a mystery,' is pretending that this gallery is boarded up and barred to us. And it most certainly is not. We can enter in and peruse the galleries, walking from room to room, discovering a new treasure in each--but we have no idea how large this gallery is, and how long we must walk in order to reach the end of it.

I was not the first to ask this question, of course. The early Church fathers and Doctors of the Church, such as St. Augustine of Hippo, were at pains to fathom the depths of God's revelation of Himself, and unfold this mystery. Contemporary Catholic thinkers still attempt to answer in a similar spirit. With the help of old and new teachers, I feel I have recently walked into a new room in the gallery, containing by far the most precious masterpieces on which I have yet laid eyes.

These same 'old and new' have much the same thing to say about the Trinity and what this means about the nature of God:

Our Christian faith affirms that Deus Caritas Est--God is love. And Love, by its nature, is a relationship.

The nature of the God Who is Love, must then necessarily entail something of the nature of a relationship.

Inspired by this thought, I drew a mental triangle which represented, for me, the Holy Trinity.

Draw it along with me:

In your mind's eye, draw a triangle. Your triangle has three points: Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

The lines between them are equidistant, connecting each equally to one another.

But a triangle is not only made up of three connected points---what about the space in between?

The lines which connect these three points also enclose a middle space, uninterrupted and singular. Draw a heart in this space. This heart will represent Love.

If the Trinity is the Three Points on this triangle, the Trinity--God--is also the One space contained within the Three.

We see something of our God before us: these Three co-eternal, consubstantial persons, and the One Heart of God, which is His Love, that connects and transcends the Three, co-eternally.

'In the heart of the Church, I will be Love'

2009-10-18T21:36:00.001+01:00

'In the heart of the Church, I will be Love'
Originally uploaded by eebrierley

The relics of St. Therese have now returned to their home in Lisieux, but the Little Flower has left behind her a trail of scattered rose petals, which shall surely lead us to the marriage feast of the Lamb.

This photograph was taken at the Carmelite church in Kensington, London, the penultimate stop of the relics on the monthlong 'pilgrimage' around England & Wales.

"When I had looked upon the mystical body of the Church, I recognised myself in none of the members which St. Paul described, and what is more, I desired to distinguish myself more favourably within the whole body. Love appeared to me to be the hinge for my vocation. Indeed I knew that the Church had a body composed of various members, but in this body the necessary and more noble member was not lacking; I knew that the Church had a heart and that such a heart appeared to be aflame with love. I knew that one love drove the members of the Church to action, that if this love were extinguished, the apostles would have proclaimed the Gospel no longer, the martyrs would have shed their blood no more.I saw and realised that love sets off the bounds of all vocations, that love is everything, that this same love embraces every time and every place. In one word, that love is everlasting.

"Then, nearly ecstatic with the supreme joy in my soul, I proclaimed: O Jesus, my love, at last I have found my calling: my call is love. Certainly I have found my place in the Church, and you gave me that very place, my God. In the heart of the Church, my mother, I will be love, and thus I will be all things, as my desire finds its direction."

--'Story of a Soul,' St. Therese of the Child Jesus

Spanish corporal killed in Afghanistan asked for Baptism before death

2009-10-16T10:11:00.001+01:00

Spanish corporal killed in Afghanistan asked for Baptism before death

Shared via AddThis

Kissing the Crucifix: St. Therese at Wormwood Scrubs

2009-10-13T09:38:00.003+01:00

St. Therese understood the depth of Christ's words from the Cross, 'I Thirst.' She comprehended his longing not for water, but for love, for souls, and for the tears of repentance. At a young age, she resolved upon a mission of gaining souls for Christ. She considered her 'first child' to be a convicted criminal. As a teenager, she read in the newspaper of a convicted man who was sentenced to be executed soon. She instantly set about earnestly praying for this man, that ere he should die, he might at last show some repentence, and his soul be won for Christ.

As the man walked to the scaffold, he stopped and turned decidedly towards a crucifix that was offered to him. He stooped and kissed the crucifix, and in the penultimate moment of his life, displayed his final repentence and conversion.

On the public schedule of sites the relics of St. Therese have visited in England & Wales, you probably won't find Wormwood Scrubs. That's because it's a prison. St. Therese has made a special visit to the men of Wormwood Scrubs Prison, and given them the opportunity to 'kiss the crucifix' of love towards God and man.

Truly St. Therese was right in proclaiming she would be able to do so much more good in Heaven than on earth.

"...The words of the Divine Reaper have been magnificently fulfilled: 'Amen, Amen, I say unto you, unless a grain of wheat, falling into the ground, die, itself remaineth alone. But if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit.'"

('Story of a Soul,' Epilogue)

If you'd like to see pictures of the prisoners at Wormwood Scrubs venerating the relics, and the mass that was held for them, in the presence of the relics, please click here.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/catholicism/sets/72157622573221550/

October 6, 2009: St. Therese at Walsingham

2009-10-07T20:14:00.001+01:00

St. Therese at Walsingham
Originally uploaded by eebrierley

There was a feeling of quiet jubiliation in the air today at Walsingham, the national shrine of England, where many hundreds of pilgrims gathered to venerate the relics of St. Therese of Lisieux.

Our souls were her roses, which she scattered lovingly before the feet of Jesus, her little offering to Our Lord.

When it was my turn to stand before the relics, I felt frozen in time and place, emptied of myself. Therese was showing me what it means to say, 'It is not I who live, but Christ who lives in me.' In her Little Way she shows how much better it is to be the weak and empty vessel that allows itself to be filled with God's grace.

At last I felt how Christ had emptied Himself for me, and now I must empty myself of 'self' for Him. This is what Therese did, and why we venerate her; but not her, but Christ in her.

If you, as a Christian, are the living Temple of God, make plenty of room in yourself for Him to be comfortable. Do not clutter His house, but leave it clean and new and empty, so as best to accommodate the Spirit Who so wishes to take up His residence in you.

National Prayer for the Visit of the Relics to England & Wales:

'God our Father,
you reveal to us the depth of your love
in the holy face of Jesus Christ your Son.
As we honour St. Therese of the Child Jesus
may we have the confidence and love
to stand fully in the light of your presence
so that the beauty of the Gospel
may expand our hearts
and open us to the gifts of your Holy Spirit.
We make this prayer through Christ Our Lord.

Our Lady of Walsingham, pray for us.
St. Therese, Patroness of the Missions, pray for us.

Lessons from Oop North

2009-08-25T14:17:00.003+01:00

"Oi'm a poor cotton-weyver, as mony a one knoowas,
Oi've nout for t'year, an' oi've word eawt my clooas,
Yo'ad hardly gi' tuppence for aw as oi've on,
My clogs are both brosten, an stuckings oi've none,
Yu'd think it wur hard,
To be browt into th' warld,
To be clemmed, an' do th' best as yo' con."

--'The Oldham Weaver'

My father-in-law, Tony, was brought up in Oldham, the heart of old Lancashire, among the mills and working class blocks of terraced houses that once made for the strong Northern communities which have now become apart of history. For sixty years, Tony dropped h's and definite articles to his heart's content, always remaining true in dialect and culture to his upbringing. While the place and time he knew has almost disappeared, we can still appreciate its heritage---there's not much poetry in it, but probably a good deal of sense.

Here are five lessons from a Lancashire lad.

1. On the World Today:

“These days, you don’t get owt for nowt.”

2. On Wall Street:

“When stock price is low, you buy. When stock price is high, you sell. I wish someone had told me that when I were 25.”

3. On Religion:

“They should bring religion back to schools. When I were a lad, there were a church right next to school, where we went for prayers and harvest festivals. Children today need basic Christian discipline. The kind of discipline that makes them say, ‘I need to clean me room up.’”

4. On Money:

“If you have money, you can do what you want. If you don’t, you can’t.”

5. On Fear of Flying:

“You’re going to sit on a plane for eight hours. For eight hours, you can worry. Or, you can forget about it and enjoy yourself. Make the most of your eight hours.”

August 18, 2009: Consolation.

2009-08-18T19:37:00.003+01:00

I retired in darkness after prayer
And of Heaven dreamt a vision fair:
There form'd, of angels, saints, and seraphim
A crowd--how I wish'd to follow them!

O! And thro' their midst, a Figure strode,
Like God enshrin'd in Man's abode;
And as He pass'd, I hoped he'd see--
But no, He did not look at me.

Faintly, to my knees I fell
With tears my eyes began to swell
Oh, how I lov'd Him! But how ever could He
Spend any of His love on me?

A Stranger, there beside me stood
For staff he held a cross of wood;
His eyes shone full and tenderly
As he fix'd an earnest gaze on me.

And question'd me, wherefore my tears?
Had I unanswer'd prayers, unquiet fears?
Whence came the dew-drop on my cheek
That seem'd its own sad tale to speak?

'O sir,' I said, 'One single word,
One look of love, I wanted from my Lord!
But see, the crowd press'd so thick about
That word or look I was left without.'

'And if, I might have seen into His eyes,
I should count it my life's dearest prize!'
The Stranger smil'd, said quietly,
'I look on you, dost thou see Me?'

I heard, and in a moment knew,
My Saviour's voice, so sweet and true!
I look'd, adoring, and beheld
The Crown of Glory that He held.

'Little one,' said he, 'Have you suffered ought?
Was there a time when I was with you not?
In clasping hand, or loving kiss,
Didst thou ever my affection miss?
For ev'ry friend, thou didst ever own
My love in theirs, surely thou hast known?'

It seem'd now, I on His bosom slept
He dried each tear I gently wept,
In dreams, there flew a bird above
Singing, 'I leave thee Peace, I give thee Love!'

I woke, in darkness and alone,
A dim light still above me shone:
It was the bird, a snowy Dove
Singing, 'I leave thee Peace, I give thee Love!'

Many times after, on that Crown I thought,
The one He held--the one I sought--
But more patient of this I was content to be,
Since the Lord had deigned to speak to me.

Since already I possess'd my dearest prize,
To have heard His voice, and seen His eyes.

July 6, 2009: Senal de Dios

2009-07-06T22:06:00.005+01:00

My friend Agustin lives in Tres Cantos, just outside Madrid, Spain, and loves to watch Heaven. This is what Heaven showed him from his balcony one day.

Agustin says this photo 'belongs to everyone who believes in Jesus Christ.'

Not everyone sees the same thing when they look at it. Some will just see clouds. Some will see a sunset. But if you saw the Saviour hanging on the Cross, please thank God today.

It's easy to dismiss this picture, and say, 'it's just clouds.' But Agustin calls it a 'senal de Dios,'--a sign from God.

How many times in your life did you dismiss the grace of God as just luck, chance or fate?

Was someone there just when you needed them?

Did you meet your spouse, and marry them, against all odds?

How many times have your prayers been answered?

Maybe on this particular evening, Agustin was the only one to see this Cross in the sky. Maybe no one else was looking. God is always there. What is of consequence--is whether we are looking for Him.

Because God does not live in the sky. God lives in the hearts of those who find Him there.

July 5, 2009: The Norman Church

2009-07-05T06:28:00.003+01:00

Mold’d arch and window-frame
Enshrin’d within a painted pane,
That fashion’d form and colour bright
To be a reliquary of Light.

A Saint smil’d on a moulder’d stone
An errant soul was drifting home
Sunbeams lit a bleeding face
The form of God to dimly trace—

A man hung limp upon a tree
A woman wept below his knee,
His eyes, clouded dark with pain
Briefly smil’d, and wept again.

The birds without chirp’d and peck’d
Between boughs with blossoms deck’d
The green turf softly lay between
The earthen world, the world unseen.

The morning spread its diamond trail
About the kirkyard’s dewy pale,
One beam of golden, eastern grace
Touch’d upon an angel’s face.

In one moment in one day begun

A tapestry of years is spun.

June 28, 2009: Sidewalk Revelation

2009-06-28T18:39:00.002+01:00

Sometimes you are so busy looking up, you don't notice God below you.

June 7, 2009: I Have No Idea Where I Am Going

2009-06-07T14:22:00.003+01:00

"My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from the desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

--Thomas Merton, Thoughts in Solitude

May 30, 2009: 'Vocation to Love'

2009-05-30T19:45:00.004+01:00

From David Werthmann's 'Novena Meditations to Saint Therese of Lisieux':

"In September of 1886, Therese wrote in her diary, 'At last I have found my true vocation: It is love!' Like the mystics and desert fathers and mothers, she believed that love is worth more than any sacrifice or ritual. Thus, she encourages us not to keep track of how many good deeds we perform, but simply to do everything--whatever it is--with love. Consider all the chores you must do in a typical day...perhaps taking out garbage, scrubbing floors, cleaning up after a sick child, sorting laundry. Make a resolution to do each task with as much love as you can. (pause)

Therese realized that God calls each person to a life of love. She wished that everyone understood that. Her own love was nourished by Jesus. At every Mass, she received the host as if it were a 'kiss of love' from Him. Therese truly felt Christ's love for her, so she tried to approach each moment with as much love as possible. Her whole preoccupation in life was to die so as to live in the love of Jesus. On her deathbed, her very last words were, 'My God, I love you.'

Bring to mind the person you love most in the whole world. Now close your eyes and imagine that your love for him or her is Christ's love for you. (pause). It's true! Vow that from now on you will strive to love God in every person whose path crosses yours."

May 29: Feast of the Sacred Heart of Jesus

2009-05-29T19:21:00.001+01:00

"My God, I offer You all my prayers, works, joys and sufferings in union with the Sacred Heart of Jesus, for the intentions for which He pleads and offers Himself in the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, in thanksgiving for Your favours, in reparation for my sins, and in humble supplication for my temporal and eternal welfare, for the needs of our holy Mother the Church, for the conversion of the sinners, and for the relief of the poor souls in purgatory.

Lord, have mercy.

Christ, have mercy.

Kyrie eleison! (Lord have mercy)

Christ, hear us.

Christ graciously hear us.

God the Father of heaven, have mercy on us.

God the Son, Redeemer of the world, have mercy on us.

God the Holy Spirit,

have mercy on us.

Holy Trinity, one God,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, Son of the Eternal Father,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, formed by the Holy Spirit in the womb of the Virgin Mother,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, substantially united to the Word of God,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, of infinite majesty,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, sacred temple of God,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, tabernacle of the Most High,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, house of God and gate of Heaven,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, burning furnace of charity,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, abode of justice and love,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, full of goodness and love,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, abyss of all virtues,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, most worthy of all praise,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, king and center of human hearts,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, in Whom are all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, in Whom dwells the fullness of Divinity,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, in Whom the Father was well pleased,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, of Whose fullness we have received,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, desire of the everlasting hills,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, patient and most merciful,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, enriching all who invoke You,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, fountain of life and holiness,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, propitiation for our sins,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, loaded down with opprobrium,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, bruised for our offenses,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, obedient to death,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, pierced with a lance,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, source of all consolation,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, our life and resurrection,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, our peace and reconciliation,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, victim for our sin,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, salvation of those whotrust in You,

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, hope of those who die in You

have mercy on us.

Heart of Jesus, delight of all the Saints,

have mercy on us.

Lamb of God, You take away the sins of the world; spare us, O Lord.

Lamb of God, You take away the sins of the world; graciously hear us, O Lord.

Lamb of God, You take away the sins of the world; have mercy on us.

Jesus meek and humble of Heart

Make our hearts like Yours."

--Litany of the Sacred Heart

May 29, 2009: Choose Wisely

2009-05-29T15:57:00.004+01:00

Jenna, a Flickr contact of mine, recently lost her sister, Debby, who died after a long battle with leukemia. Her death has reminded me of Pope Benedict's recent words, that the digital technologies of today are 'truly a gift to humanity,' because of the way they enable us to slip into each other's lives when needed, and turn small words into great actions.

Of course, I didn't know Debby or her family. She was a bedridden blogger for a long time, and there were a few last words she wished for her sister to transcribe for her. I think they are worth sharing, especially since with these words, Debby has turned her death into a positive action:

"In my blog, I often give assignments for people to do. Here's the ones that are on my mind....

1. Appreciate everything. Even stupid stuff. Since I've been sick, I've communicated with a number of service members abroad. We understand each other well because we both know how much we miss just the normal stuff that most people take for granted. Driving. Driving in traffic. Complaining about stupid stuff is for people who have no idea how good they have it.

2. Be a force for good. There's enough bad stuff in the world without adding to it. Forgive people and leave grudges for others. Do kind things just because. Figure out what you are good at and do good with it.

3. Seek a higher power. I believe Jesus Christ is my savior and this gives me comfort. As it takes faith to believe, it takes faith not to believe. I believe God doesn't want us to live our lives on an island, and that finding a community of faith that is uplifting and supportive to you can make a huge difference in your life. If you have that cool. If you don't, consider it. But don't wait until you are looking death in the eye because you will miss out on some neat things. (Love you ACTS community!)

4. If you have kids, squeeze them. And then squeeze them again. Give yourself a pat on the back if you are responsible and work hard to give your children a good life and better opportunities. Sometimes you don't give yourself enough credit. If you have people in your life that you love, tell them that. Often. Don't save your I love you's for a rainy day.

5. Take care of yourself. I understand more than most that there are injuries and illnesses that you can't prevent by eating well and moving, but that doesn't mean you should be fatalistic. Nothing like being hooked up to a respirator to make you appreciate just getting going, doing and breathing. Treat yourself at least as well as you treat your car--you put the right type of fuel in your car and you drive it safely most of the time--you are more important than a car so treat yourself that way.

6. Enjoy life. Life is meant to be enjoyed, and as long as it isn't hurting yourself or others, go for it. Bring joy to others. Find passions in your life that make you want to get out of bed in the morning, unless your passion is sleeping and then go ahead and sleep in.

7. Be open to new things. Listen. Doesn't mean you have to change your mind, but who knows, you might learn something.

8. Support sensible health insurance reform. I'm not sure what that ends up looking like, but injuries and illnesses shouldn't fate people into a life of insurmountable debt and bill collectors. I spent the last â€œhealthyâ€ months of my pre-hospital stay, worried and scrambling to find insurance because my COBRA insurance ran out. Patients should be able to focus on getting better and not crushingly large mountains of papers telling them that their credit is forever screwed.

9. Ask for help. This is a hard assignment. For a lot of people, it isn't easy to ask for help when you need it. But what I've discovered is that it is a part of the human condition for people to want to help those in need. People enjoy helping others. Sometimes you get help where you don't really expect it. So if you need help with something, go to the appropriate people and get it.
I sometimes think that the bad stuff that happens in life is one of the few things that bring people together. It still sucks, but maybe it sucks a little less.

There are too many people to thank for the help they gave me and my family over these difficult times. I would list you individually but am afraid I would leave someone important out. My last days have not been easy at all, but it has been a great comfort to know about all those who gave me prayers and love.

In my life, I've looked for love in a lot of wrong places, and as I die, it is nice to know I am surrounded by love.

10. Last assignment. There is no last assignment. You create your own assignments every day. Choose wisely."

Debby died on May 18, 2009.

May 28, 2009: Only Love

2009-05-28T19:13:00.003+01:00

"Only love has meaning. It raises up our smallest actions into infinity."

--Divine Mercy in my Soul, Saint Maria Faustina

May 16, 2009: Smile on the world.

2009-05-16T21:59:00.003+01:00

Lord,

You are the source of all love,
You showed it through Jesus
Who shed His blood for us.
We ask you:
open our hearts,
make them as generous as Yours.
Give us a heart eager to serve others.
Let us be the expression of Your smile on the world.

--Prayer from Heilig Bloedbasiliek, Brugge, Belgium

April 20, 2009: A little belated.

2009-04-20T15:51:00.002+01:00

My grandmother is getting pretty old now. (No offense, Granny, I’m just going by the statistics.) At 89, she doesn’t feel like herself anymore. “This isn’t my face,” she says to me from beneath a pair of reading glasses and a wrinkled frown, “This isn’t my hair.”

Maybe when we get old, we feel like sleeping blossoms, hid beneath crumpled autumn leaves. We know spring will bear the fruits of winter, but this knowledge requires a very special faith from us. Only faintly in our ears do we catch the hallowed tones of our Saviour’s voice, upon His Cross, gasping beneath His fading strength, to us calling,

‘Lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world.’

Was He ever so beautiful as when He triumphed upon His Cross? My grandmother is beautiful too. Her eyes are like two amethysts, spakling when she smiles at me. I don’t want her to worry about a few wrinkles. Beauty isn’t in the eye of the beholder, it’s in the heart. I know she spent her life turning heads. But now she is turning hearts towards her in love. Her beauty glances with stories untold, love given and received.

Granny, you are still pretty. Don’t say, ‘this isn’t me.’ I love this you, and someday hope, that I will be beautiful like you.

Happy Birthday.

April 11, 2009: How much do I love you?

2009-04-12T02:26:00.003+01:00

Have you asked yourself, what you would suffer for your spouse, your child, your parent, your sister or brother? For their sake, what would you be willing to bear?

I have just heard a charming story, told by Jimmy Segers on Radio Maria, which I would like to share with you. It is about a father who asks his child, 'How much do I love you?'

He holds his hands in front of his heart, maybe six inches apart.

'This much?' he asks.

'No!' cries his little daughter.

He widens his hands a little more. 'This much?' he asks again.

Still she cries, 'No!'

A little more he widens his arms, but still it is not enough. Finally he stretches his arms wide, and asks at last, 'This much?'

A bright smile and 'yes!' is his reply.

One day at mass, this father stood next to his daughter, and asked her, 'How much does Jesus love you?'

She opens her arms as wide as she can, and says, 'This much!'

But her father asks, 'How do you know?'

Well, according to Jimmy, his daughter didn't know how to answer this question at first. She had not thought of this yet.

A moment's thought suffices. She points to the large crucifix which looms above the altar.

'Look!' she says, 'His arms are wide open!'

Easter blessings to all.

March 29, 2009: The Son's Father

2009-03-29T02:42:00.005+01:00

I have a Spanish friend who taught me a saying: La providencia va siempre por delante.

'God ever goes before us.'

This means, I think, that like any good parent, God anticipates and fulfills our needs ere we ourselves are cognisant of desiring aught. He loved us ere we were able to conceive any regard towards Him. I have often thought that the book of Genesis was the saddest tale of unrequited love I ever read.

I know some people who resent the God of the Old Testament. He is too stern, too harsh, too overawing and magnificent. He is the Father of the childhood of our humanity, demonstrating to us His authority, articulating the relationship between Creator and Creation, and delineating the boundaries of Heaven and Hell.

It seems the most natural thing in the world that God should desire to manifest Himself to us in a new way: also to show, that He is a friend and brother who walks beside us, who takes our hand, who embraces us in our moments of greatest need.

Many Christians today find it hard to understand the judicious authority of the Father, when set in direct comparison with the lovingkindness of the Son. God is loving and good--how could He also be the authority which presides over Hell? If Jesus is God, then how can damnation exist in the light of Christ's love for us?

It is important to remember that it is only through the Son, that we are fully able to understand and know the Father, as in the case of the New Testament, which alone fully brings to light the veiled mysteries of the Old. As Jesus Himself said, we are only able to recognize Him as the Son of God through the Father, that is, through the direct influence of His Spirit and His love. No amount of miracles, when seen only with the eyes of the flesh, could have influenced us to believe in Him, had not the Father willed it in Love.

So, if God loves us--if He would go beyond the sacrifice of Abraham, and yield up Himself and His own Son at once, for our sake--then why would He send us to Hell? If He wished to save us--if through Christ's blood, we are forgiven--then is not our salvation guaranteed, and damnation non-existent?

I am sure many of you have read the Book of Genesis. Read it over carefully. Where do you read therein, that God created Hell? It does not say that He did. It says He created the Earth and the Heavens, and the stars in their courses. Hell is no where mentioned, and certainly, Sin and Death are not the creations of God, but the consequences of Man's own choices.

I have read something very profound which Pope John Paul said. He wanted people to understand better the real nature of 'Hell.' Until you understand what hell really is, I do not think you can comprehend Heaven, or God Himself.

The late Pope pointed out, that 'hell' only exists as the state of a man who has rejected God, and who chooses to live apart from Him. This discordant loss of faith and divorce from the love of God alone constitutes the real meaning of 'hell.' God does not send this man to hell, nor does He damn him. The choice is made, and he has damned himself.

This sounds very extreme to many ears, but I do not think the late Pope was necessarily speaking of fire and brimstone per se. He was pointing out that Hell has a much larger, and more important meaning. The boundaries of Hell extend beyond life and death--it is not a pit of fire, so much as the abyss of the soul.

It is as easy to live in hell as to die in it. It is a choice we make for ourselves, not a judgement that God pronounces over us. He would not will it for any of us. We are now, at this moment, building our heaven or our hell. I have heard of people who despair of going to church again, because they are too ashamed, too full of regret for their own sins and mistakes. Their hell is not to realize how great it is to be humbled in the eyes of God, and to cast ourselves completely upon His mercy. The fruit of our own iniquities is the glory of the salvation so dearly bought for us.

Hell is not a place where dwell souls who were in need of what God has freely given.

Hell is a blinding darkness, in which we look no more upon the face of God.