Jesus Needs New PR--Author Matthew Paul Turner

hillSUNG?!

2008-08-21T17:34:00.005-05:00

OK, so you probably know about this already, but here's the link to the main story.

Michael Guglielmucci, one of the well-known preachers and songwriters for Hillsong--a Christian music company out of Australia known for its praise & worship music--faked his battle with terminal cancer. He even had his family fooled into thinking that he was dying.

The Yahoo link says, earlier this year, Mr Guglielmucci released a hit song The Healer which was featured on Sydney church Hillsong's latest album. It debuted at No. 2 on the ARIA charts. The song has become an anthem of faith for believers, many of whom are suffering their own illness and were praying for a miracle for Mr Guglielmucci, who has claimed for two years to be terminally ill.

This makes me very sad. Quite honestly, I've never been too much of a fan of Hillsong's musical productions--most of them are a little too showy for me--but I'm always saddened when these kinds of stories hit the media wave. (Of course, I realize I'm riding it some by mentioning it on my blog.) Anyway, I feel bad for his family, and the people who were affected by his story.

I'm glad Michael's getting help. To me it sounds like he's either mentally sick--bipolar maybe?-- or very much caught up in the evangelical machine.

an overdue update (plus a book giveaway!)

2008-08-21T10:21:00.012-05:00

My wife's more popular than me.

I've been a terrible blogger this week. While my wife has been updating her blog on a daily basis, I've struggled to even blog twice. My wife has become a rather popular blogger. Blog fame is such an odd thing to me.

Funny story.

The other day I was out around town when a very kind woman stopped me.

"Uh, excuse me," she said, "Are you Matthew?"

Being the narcissist that I am, I figured she had read one of my books. So I smiled brightly. and said, "Yep, that's me." And then I prepared for her to compliment my writing. I know that makes me sound pathetic, and I don't always assume everything is about me, but I'm human and on that day I just assumed.

"It's so very nice to meet you," she said, "I read your wife's blog! I just love it. Your baby is so cute, and your wife is just adorable. I don't mean to be a lurker, but I thought it was you and I thought I'd say hello. I promise I don't do this sort of thing too often."

She was so nice.

But as the very nice lady gushed about my wife's blog for a few seconds, I was laughing on the inside (btw: what does laughing on the inside actually mean?) as she told me how she discovered Jessica's blog. I wasn't laughing at at her of course. But at myself for being so sure that she had "recognized" me. I called Jessica on the way home and we had a good laugh at that.

Jessica and Elias are in Wisconsin until Saturday visiting the great grandparents. This is the first grand baby on Jessica's side of the family, so I know that her parents (Nana and Poppa) were quite ecstatic about having more time with little Elias.

Here's a quick update on a few things....

Pants!

First, the following picture of me is from last weekend's Echo Conference. I'm not sure who took it or I would give them credit. The one thing I took away from this photo was that I must throw away those jeans. It looks like I'm wearing something Daphne would run around in when she was solving mysteries on Scooby Doo. Seriously. I had no idea that those pants looked like that from afar. The sad thing is, they're my favorite pair of jeans. Gosh, now I sound like Daphne. Jeepers! (And yes, I know that it was Thelma or Velma--whatever her name was--who said "jeepers!")

Maybe it's just the way I was standing. Or perhaps it's the angle. Anyway, like I wrote last week, I had an awesome time at Echo. It was the first chance that I had to read portions of churched out loud in front of a decent-sized audience. The response was bigger and better than I would have ever expected. It was seriously a shot-in-the-arm for me. (No, I don't support the use of recreational drugs.) But the audience's reaction was very encouraging for sure.

Tour stuff

As I told you a few months ago, I've been invited to participate in the "Lord Save Us" Tour (formerly called the "Lord Save Us From Your Followers" Tour. I think that's what it was called.) Anyway, I can't tell you how thrilled I am to be apart of this event. I can't share too many details as of yet, but the stuff we're dreaming up for this live experience I think is going to be amazing, creative, and hilarious. Seriously, if all of it comes together (and even if it doesn't), I think it's got the potential to be a very entertaining (even inspiring) evening.

And I'm excited to announce that plans for the tour are very much underway. In fact, the website for the tour just went live yesterday! Please check it out here. Let me know what you think.

The lineup includes Dan Merchant, Scott Phillips, and myself. Dan and Scott are two of the most creative people I've had the pleasure of working alongside. In addition to that, they are both hilarious and thoughtful, too.

If you'd like to help us get the word out about the tour, you might consider putting a banner up on your blog or myspace page. If you're interested in helping get the word out, click here.

To book the tour into a college, church, or your local fish fry, go here.

OK, I have more I could write about, but I have to do other things now. My wife left me a to-do list to complete by the time she gets home.

Giveaway

Oh, I almost forgot... one more thing... and I know I've just given you twenty different places to go already.... but I have two books that I'd like to give away.

The first one is a children's book called, are you ready for this... When God Created My Toes. (I suppose God has a toe factory somewhere.) Anyway, Jessica read it to Elias and he just stared at her with a blank look on his face. However, he does that a good bit, even when I'm singing Amy Grant songs to him with a British accent. He just stares. Anyway, When God Created My Toes isn't the most exciting children's book around, I must be honest. But it's also not the worst. I'd give it three stars out of five. Maybe it was just me, but I just sort of thought some of the rhymes were a bit blah. But maybe I was over-thinking it. That certainly happens on occasion.

Anyway, now that I've set this book up so nicely, would you like win a copy for your kid(s)? Maybe a baby shower gift? You could even donate it to the nursery at your place of worship! I should add that the illustrations are kind of cute. And the message is nice. And you'll learn what was going on when God created your toes! I want to know what he was doing when he made my spleen. I'm being serious! Now that would be an exciting children's book.

OK, now for the second book... it's called The Sacred Echo by Margaret Feinberg. I've known Margaret for a few years now and the one thing that always comes to mind when I think of her is that she is kind. She's also a great writer and a very passionate storyteller. I think her kindness is hard to miss in her writing. And it's not in a showy way at all--if that was true I would have said she's nice. There's a difference between being kind and being nice. Reading Margaret's thoughts about life and God feels as though you've spent an entire evening with her at a quaint coffee shop sipping on a cup of Old Gray (not to be confused with Grey Goose) and listening to stories that always seem timeless. There's a warmth in her writing that I find comforting, like hanging out with a friend who knows you inside and out.

The Sacred Echo is about listening for God. And in Margaret's ponderings about the work of God, you meet a good number of her friends along the way, those who have helped shape her belief that God is constantly moving and making himself known in our realities.

It's a good book.

HERE'S HOW TO WIN:

All you have to do is leave a comment with your name as well as the title of your favorite book (or one of them anyway), and let's make it one that has been written in the last 20 years. On Monday I'll randomly select two names. The first name will win When God Made My Toes and the second name will win The Sacred Echo. I'll announce the names of the winners on my blog by noon on Monday! Good luck.

Oh, and tell your friends about the giveaway...

Sorry this blog is so long.

echo (echo)... the first day

2008-08-17T13:43:00.004-05:00

I am home safely from Dallas, Texas. It was so nice to put my arms around my sweet wife yesterday afternoon and kiss little Elias's forehead and cheeks. I think Elias missed me. Probably not as much as Jessica missed me. But I could tell he missed me a little.

The Echo Conference was amazing. Here are my personal highlights:

1) The food. My gosh, the FOOD was amazing. From the junk food to the healthy food to the food that does nothing but taste good, it was all amazing. I think I gained at least a pound or two just in strawberries. Mmm.

2) I finally got to meet Rob Thomas and Scott McClellan. Great guys. These two were the ones who invited me to write for Collide Magazine for the magazine's first year. Rob is also the mastermind behind Igniter Media, Worship House Media, Collide Magazine, as well as the Echo Conference. It was awesome finally being able to meet those guys in person.

3) Got to hang with my good friend Bart Damer. Bart is perhaps the most creative person I know, at least when it comes to design, graphic art, and video technique. He's ridiculous! Check out his work here!

4) Mark Steele and I became friends. Discovering that we had a lot in common certainly helped each of us with fodder so that we could poke fun at each other. So we spent the weekend coming up with so-so-funny jabs about each other. You know, stuff that we thought was hilarious, but everybody else only thought it was "kind of" funny. But for us, it was fun. Mark and his co-host Jeff also interviewed me for the Steelehouse Podcast. You can listen to it here. It's a lengthy interview--about 25 minutes.

OK, so that's just the first day. I'll write more a little later...

in dallas

2008-08-14T18:01:00.000-05:00

I made it here safely. The picture is the view from my hotel window. Exciting huh?

On the plane ride down here I sat next to two people who spent half the time talking about how awesome the Holy Spirit was treating them and the other half talking about their favorite weight loss pills. I'm not kidding you.

Trust me. That experience is going in a book someday. It was awesome!

As you know, I'm at the Echo Conference.

Tonight, I'm being interviewed by Mark Steele for his Steelehouse Productions podcast. If you're not familiar with Mark, he wrote a book called Flashbang for Relevant Books and Half Life for David C. Cook Publishing.

Look forward to meeting him.

I speak tomorrow afternoon. Right before Donald Miller. OK, so actually, I speak right before dinnertime. Then Donald Miller. But still, I've never "opened" for a best seller before. I feel special.

I'll keep you posted.

Between you and me, I'm a little irritated that I can't watch the Olympics tonight. I'll live. Have a great Thursday evening!

'six prayers god always answers': an interview with its author

2008-08-14T10:17:00.004-05:00

My wife Jessica is doing a giveaway for a book called Six Prayers God Always Answers. Here's the link if you'd like to enter the contest! It's easy. You just need to leave a comment.

After reading all of the great comments on Jessica's blog--almost 200 of them!--I thought it would be interesting to do an interview with one of the book's authors Jennifer Schuchmann.

I've known Jennifer for a couple of years now. During this time she's become a dear friend and on a couple of occasions a rather helpful therapist.

I highly recommend that, once you've failed to win the book through Jessica's blog, you go buy the book from Amazon or from some other book retailer. This book isn't just another book on prayer. Jennifer isn't an authority on the subject. She's a journeyer like you and me...

Here's the interview.... (btw: I'm on my way to Dallas to speak at the Echo Conference. Hope to see you there.)

Jennifer, you've never struck me as the kind of person who would write a book on prayer…

Thanks. I’ll take that as a compliment. And that’s why I wrote one. I’m not a prayer warrior, I don’t like chains, and for most of my life my prayer time was spent wondering if prayer even worked. Does God hear my prayers? Does he answer them? How?

As a Christian, I believe one of the primary ways I learn about God’s character is through his word. And in his word (the Bible) he’s the one who makes some pretty audacious and presumptuous claims, like “Ask whatever you will and it will be given to you.” Seems to me what he’s saying is that he answers all of my prayers. The problem was I didn’t always see how he did that. This book was my attempt to understand how he does what he already claims he’ll do.

Do you think there's right way and a wrong way to pray?

I don’t think so. I think God welcomes conversation with us in whatever way we’re willing to have it. It’s often preachers who put “rules” into prayer making us feel like we have to use certain words or get into a specific posture before we’re “really praying.” I think God laughs at how stilted some of our prayers sound. And we’re often embarrassed to pray out loud because we know how false and fake our words sound. Prayer can get really awkward when we try to force it. I think we need to think or pray as less of a to-do (like a quiet time) and more of an on-going conversation.

Explain that a little more. Are you suggesting that we stop closing our eyes or kneeling when we pray? As if...

Yes, if it frees you up to pray more honestly and authentically. I sometimes tell people who are stuck in the rut of only praying formally to pray while they drive. They can’t close their eyes and they have a lot to think about so they learn to pray from a different place then they do when they pray formally.

Let me give you an example. My son has never-ever finished dinner, ran up to my office, pulled out the 20-pound cream stationary and hand-calligraphied a note that said, “Dearest Father and Mother: Thank you so much for the sustenance you gave me to the nourishment of my body.”

Yet, what he has done is taken a mouthful of food and said, “Mmm, Mom. I love this chicken.” Even though he is talking with his mouthful, it makes me feel appreciated. He noticed that I made his favorite dish. It makes me happy when he notices things I’ve done for him. I don’t need a formal letter expressing his gratitude. In fact if I got one, I’d be immediately suspicious, “What do you want?”
I think God is like that. I think he really likes it when I say thanks for the little things—when I notice that he’s given me a good hair day, that it didn’t rain on the weekend, or when the slow car moved out of the left lane just when I got there.

If I am pleased by such a little comment as “Mmm, good chicken,” how much more so must God be? He is a more perfect father than I will ever be as a parent.

know preachers give these ludicrous examples of people getting up at four in the morning to kneel down on cold cement floors to pray all day, but frankly I can’t do that. I’ve got a kid to get off to school and a life to live. But I truly believe that if throughout my day I acknowledge God in big and small ways that he is as delighted (and maybe more delighted) than if my prayers became a chore on my to-do list.

I recently had a pastor’s wife tell me that she believed God answered prayer—other people’s prayers—but never her prayers. My response was, “Wow! That must make you really angry.” She admitted that it did. I asked her if she ever told God how angry that made her. She said she was afraid that she’d be struck by lightening if she did.

Now this breaks my heart. Here is a woman who knows all the theology yet doesn’t see it in her life. I can’t for a minute believe that a loving God wants that.

I told her she needed to go have an ugly prayer time with God. She needed to get mad, scream at him, and curse if that helped her to express her anger and frustration with God. I compared it to my own teenage son. I expect him to treat me with respect. We don’t tolerate yelling or cursing from him. However, if he was really angry with me, I’d rather him come and yell at me, even curse me, so that I could hear what was going on and have a chance to respond. If all he did was go into his room, shut the door, and mope I couldn’t respond to him at all.

Again, I think God is like this. I think he welcomes our angry prayers because he loves relationship with us so much that he’ll take whatever conversation we’re willing to have.

When God says “Ask and you will receive,” does he really mean it? Can we pray for anything?

See here once again, I think religious people have messed up God’s word. His word says we can ask for anything, but we try to protect him, so we add on caveats such as “if it is in his will” or some other nonsense. But my reading of the Bible says ask and he’ll answer.

Again, well meaning teachers and preachers have said, “God answers prayer with a yes, no, or a wait.” That makes me so mad! If every time I asked my husband for something he responded with a yes, no, or a not now, we’d be divorced. That isn’t a very satisfying relationship. And frankly, I expect more out of my God than I do out of my husband.

But what if you really want something selfish, like say a brand new Mac, or your book to sell a million copies and be number one on the New York Times Bestseller list for thirty weeks, will God answer that?

Again, I believe that God has invited us to audaciously come to him with even the most selfish of requests—to win the lottery, for a new car, or for fame and fortune from the sales of our books. I truly believe that our innermost desires are placed there by God whether it is a dream for our future, our desire for something shiny, or our need to feel important.

We were created in his image. It’s not accident we think big, that we’re attracted to beauty, or that we want something more out of life. But I believe that when it comes to the answers we get to our prayers we have to look outside of the specifics we pray for and realize that God’s answer to our prayer may be very different than the one we expect.

Again, an example with my son: He wants a violent video game. Why? Because he’s a 13-year-old boy whose testosterone is kicking in and shooting people on a screen feeds that. However, I know that violent video games affect him in negative ways that he can’t yet understand. So instead I feed his real need for excitement with a different kind of shooting--we expanded the patio in our backyard to make a basketball court and bought a new goal that could be raised and lowered so he can play one-on-one with his dad and his friends. He now shoots basketballs for the same sense of mastery and accomplishment that he wanted from the video game.

Did I give him what he asked for? No.

But did I answer his request in a way that met what he really needed whether or not he sees it now? Absolutely.

As C.S. Lewis so masterfully explained in The Weight of Glory, “Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased."

Do I get extra points for quoting C.S. Lewis on your blog?

Not so much. But I'll still call you up for therapy on occasion. That's better than extra points, right?

have you seen this?

2008-08-12T23:08:00.002-05:00

Focus on the Family posted this "supposed to be funny" video on their web site.

The man asks his Focus audience to pray for rain--a nominal yet harmless flood--on the evening of Obama's speech at the Democratic National Convention.

OK, all politics aside--it's just not that funny.

video update! stuff we've learned so far

2008-08-12T21:40:00.002-05:00

FYI: This video blog is a little lengthy.

sunshine and nectarines...

2008-08-09T13:22:00.002-05:00

First, let me talk about the weather. Wow. It's like 80 degrees in Nashville with only a little humidity. So yeah, heavenly. Last August Nashville had like 30 days right in a row where it was 100 degrees or more. And the humidity was just awful.

Anyway, all that to say: It's very pretty outside. Sort makes me wish I had a yard to mow or an orchard to prune. When I was little, I hated helping my father with our small orchard of fruit trees. But that was because all he ever let me do was go around and pick up the branches and twigs that he cut. If I'd been given any control over what was/wasn't cut, I might have enjoyed it more.

On second thought, if I'm completely honest, I probably would have just cut them down or let them grow. I was sort of a lazy kid.

But now, I miss the fruit trees. Especially our nectarine tree. Few things are better than a ripe nectarine.

OK, I'm officially sounding old. I've mentioned pruning and nectarines. Please, somebody shoot me if I start referring to 1991 as the good ole days.

Wow. What is happening to this post?

Elias slept through the night all week long. Jessica and I are shocked by that. We've heard so many horror stories about being up all night long with babies that we expected to need heroin to survive our first few weeks of parenting. Of course, we know it could change at any time, but until that happens, I've decided to just enjoy it!

I'm currently reading a hilarious book called Waiter Rant. If you don't mind an "edgy" read, it's a hysterical account of one man's experiences working as a server. The guy who wrote it also has a rather extensive blog. If you've ever waited tables, you will find this book rather humorous and perhaps therapeutic.

Happy Saturday!

steven curtis chapman on good morning america

2008-08-07T21:20:00.001-05:00

elias's second photo shoot

2008-08-06T22:12:00.004-05:00

Just a couple shots from yesterday's shoot with Tom Uchida. Special thanks to my friend Sharon for the amazing blanket!

three things about elias

2008-08-06T21:14:00.010-05:00

-Whenever my son is feeding on the boob, he makes the loudest and most awkward noises. He grunts, snorts, hoots, lifts his hands in praise to God, and passes gas. Maybe he'll make decent marriage material after all.

-During yesterday's photo shoot, Elias peed on me twice and pooped on me once. Seriously, my boy can pee. And he's not a bad pooper either.

-He gives the best hugs. His hugs are very different than hugs from bigger people. They're soft. Never awkward or sideways. Always unexpected. And as natural as a reflex.

*Jessica took this picture in our living room.

a few of the songs i'm listening to right now

2008-08-06T00:33:00.006-05:00

*Imogen Heap has new (new to me anyway) remix of her song "Hide and Seek." You can buy it at iTunes on the Songs for Tibet album that released yesterday. If you liked the original mix, I think you'll love this new mix just as much! Her new album releases this fall. You can listen to her new song at her Myspace page.

*Joan Osborne has a new set coming out in September called Little Wild One. This will be the first time since 1996 that she's worked with the producers of her "wildly" successful Relish album. You can listen to three new songs on her MySpace page. "Hallelujah in the City" is definitely worth your time.

*Brandon Heath's first single is a song called "Give Me Your Eyes." His manager left me a message on Facebook telling me that there's a soon-to-be released video for the song (he says it's amazing!), but until then, check out this live version of the song. FYI: the single is available to download at iTunes.

*Bebo Norman has a new single out, too. It's called "Britney." And while it's definitely a little bit of a departure for Bebo (especially the chorus), I think it's worth a listen. You can buy the song at iTunes. But somebody has put this "Britney" video together with Bebo's song playing over the footage. It's a bit cheesy, but at least you can hear the song. But I must admit, there's a few moments when the footage and the lyrics of the song come together nicely. Almost touching. Check it out.

want some new (and free) sixpence none the richer music?

2008-08-05T19:29:00.002-05:00

Four free Sixpence songs at www.NoiseTrade.com

elias's first photo shoot...

2008-08-05T15:59:00.003-05:00

For the record, these shots are not from today's photo shoot that I mentioned earlier. Our friends Amber and Josh over at Ulmer Studios came over on Saturday and spent an hour or more taking pictures of our little guy. He was so agreeable during the shoot, too. It was like he was working the camera at one point.

If you live in the Nashville area, and are interested in an affordable photo shoot for your child, family, or band, you might consider contacting Amber and Josh. They are very easy to work with, and happen to be very creative. Jessica met Amber through her addiction to scrapbooking. Amber is a very talented scrapper. Check out her portfolio here.

These are just two of the shots, a sample they sent us right away. We'll showcase more when we get them.

a little explanation...

2008-08-05T14:17:00.003-05:00

For those of you who have read my blog for a while now, you know that some of my posts are a bit controversial (not to everybody, but to some of my readers) and on occasion receive a fair share of criticism. I don't usually shy away from criticism. I rarely censor an individual's comments or opinions. And I think only twice have I deleted a post because it was creating unnecessary drama. I kind of like a little drama. Ask my wife and friends. To me, a blog is supposed to create dialog, whether it's dialog that supports my idea or opinion or contradicts it. In other words, I don't have a problem with somebody telling me I'm off my rocker for not liking the music of Third Day.

I completely understand that we all have opinions, and if somebody LOVES Third Day, they have every right to voice their thoughts on a blog post that criticizes one of their favorite bands. Again, it's a conversation. It's my hope that we don't take ourselves too seriously. That's hard to do sometimes. But I think it should be the goal. This is after all, just a blog.

When I posted the follow up piece about Third Day's album cover looking very similar to Radiohead's "Hail To the Thief" album, it was very late and I posted quickly. Within the post, I used two words that some people don't believe a "Christian" should use. I respect that. When somebody challenged me on my use of "colorful" language, I didn't mind the criticism, the advice, or people making their opinions known to me.

But as I was in the middle of a photo shoot with my son, I received a comment from a blog reader that was so over the top and ridiculous, that I deleted it. Her words had little to do with the post in question and more about me personally. I don't usually mind when people offer their criticism about me, even if it's a little personal. I mean, it's not like I jump up and down and get all excited. I'm human. It certainly stings. But since I can dish it out--and most of you know I can--I need to be able to take it too. And I know that. But sometimes a blog commenter goes just a little far--and in my opinion, the comment I deleted did... and since it's my blog, I chose to delete the comment.

Believe it or not, I don't go out of my way to offend you. I really don't. I just try to offer my opinions about some things, and I try to be funny. Sometimes I try too hard and that shows. Other times, I go a little over the top. But that's why my books have editors. They are smarter than me, and are much better at "thinking" through the stuff that I write.

Unfortunately, they don't edit my blog. Maybe they should.

Anyway, I just felt like I needed to explain my decision for deleting a comment and the post, especially to those of you who have read my blog for a while now. I hate censorship. It's my desire to let everyone who is kind enough to read my blog on a regular basis to be able to share their opinions.

I'll shut up now. I appreciate each of you. Well, if I'm honest, I'm a little irritated with one of you. But the rest of you, I really do value you and your thoughts... OK, I'm really done now.

Thanks for reading this rant... and thanks also for your kind words about the prelude to 'churched.'

billy graham

2008-08-05T09:26:00.002-05:00

My pastor Pete Wilson just posted some great thoughts on Billy Graham's leadership style. Read them at his blog.

churched: an excerpt

2008-08-04T19:17:00.004-05:00

OK, so I'm not sure if I'm really supposed to release this yet, but I figure if it's already at Barnes&Noble.com, I won't get in too much trouble from my publisher.

So, here it goes... this is the prelude to churched. Pass it around to all of your family and friends. Leave your thoughts. This is just the prelude, but it's a small part that will hopefully whet your appetite for the whole thing, which will be in bookstores everywhere in October.

prelude

The man’s shoulder was inked with a tattoo of Jesus breathing fire out of his mouth, which I concluded to mean one of two things: the man was going to offer me the opportunity to be born again in the hot fumes of a firebreathing Messiah or he planned to kill me and make it necessary for me to be born again.

Like any “good” American, I had already been born again–since childhood I’d pretty much been on shuffle and repeat–but I still feared either scenario. I couldn’t stop looking at the man’s shoulder. His Jesus was green and faded, and because of a small mole, it appeared as though my Lord and Savior had a foreign object dangling from one nostril. Then the man looked at me from the opposite end of the sauna, tightened the towel around his waist, and said, “How are you, man? My name is Jim.”

I didn’t say anything at first. His question sort of paralyzed me. Would he pull a small Gideons Bible from somewhere underneath that towel, look up a bunch of frightful verses in Romans, and then ask me to get down on my hands and knees and repeat after him? I wouldn’t do it. Not in a sauna. Not just wearing a towel. Besides, I had sworn off being born again again in this decade.

“Hello.” I spoke carefully, still not ready to trust a person who had a flaming-tongue Messiah on an appendage. “My name is Matthew.”

“Good to meet you, Matthew. Man, I don’t know about you, but I have had the craziest day.” Jim stared at me as he talked. I think he was making sure I paid attention. “I didn’t even work out today. I just came right to the sauna.” He stretched his arms and then massaged his left shoulder, pinching Jesus’s face with his fingers.

I live in Nashville. The stereotypes about this town are true. Everyone is or has been a musician at some point in their life. Most of us who live here will carry on long conversations with people we don’t know. When it rains here, the majority of us forget how to drive and become fully capable of killing ourselves. And everyone here has asked Jesus into their hearts at least once, if only to fulfill the requirements for getting a Tennessee driver’s license.

But if I was going to stay true to the Nashville way, I would have to ask Jim to explain his “crazy day.” That’s not considered nosey in this town. He fully expected me to ask.

“What’s been so crazy about your day?”

“Oh, just work, man. One of those days when you wonder whether or not you should have gotten out of bed.”

“What kind of work do you do?”

“I’m an associate pastor at the Pentecostal church just up the road.”

“The apostolic one?”

“Oh, you know it?”

“It’s sort of difficult to miss.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. And it’s about to get bigger. The deacon board just approved a ten-million-dollar expansion. Some of the members think we need a new connection center. I think it’s a waste of money, but what are you going to do? So Matthew, are you a Christian?”

“I love Jesus. Does that count?”

Jim laughed as though he understood what I meant. At the time, I was going through a period when I didn’t like telling people I was a Christian. I didn’t want them to be scared of me, fearing that I would invite them to church or a “rock concert” starring Kutless. And I didn’t want them blaming me for the war in Iraq. Simply telling people I loved Jesus seemed like a cop-out to some of my friends, but often it kept me from having to own the sins of evangelicals in places like Kansas or South Carolina or two miles up the road at Jim’s Pentecostal church.

“You know, man,” said Jim, “I moved here a couple of years ago from Connecticut, where it’s–in my opinion–spiritually dry. I thought moving here would make being a Christian a whole lot easier.”

“Easier? Why did you think that?”

“Because Nashville is the Christian Mecca.” Jim made air quotes with his fingers when he said, “Christian Mecca.” I’m sure he did it so I wouldn’t assume he believed Nashville was Mecca or that Mecca was Christian.

Among Christians, air quotes are a form of contextualization. I’m partial to using them myself, mostly because they prevent somebody from taking a potentially rash or exaggerated statement and using it against me. “Wait just a minute,” I can say to my antagonist. “I totally threw air quotes around the words big fat loser when describing the pastor. That clears me, man. I’m clean.”

While they’re not biblical, air quotes seem to sanctify insults and debatable theology like baptismal water sanctifies a baby’s forehead.

But I understood Jim’s point. While I’m quite sure religious people in places like Chicago and Detroit don’t kneel southward when they say prayers to Jesus, I have met a good number of vacationers who come to Nashville because this city is a big ol’ John Deere buckle in the Bible Belt.

“Seriously, think about it, Matthew. Do you know of any other city in America better known for its fear of God?” Jim wiped sweat off his brow. “I don’t think I do.”

I thought for a second. “I hear Colorado Springs is rather fearful.”

“I’m sure that’s true. But I doubt it’s Nashville. I’ve been told this town has more churches per capita than any other city in America.” Jim nodded. “Honest-to-God truth, Matthew, that’s what I’ve been told by a number of people, and I can believe it.”

I believed it too. No doubt we have a lot of churches in this town. But since I’ve heard the same statistic used in reference to Dallas, Birmingham, and Orlando, I’m not sure it’s scientific. But scientific matters don’t hold much weight in Christian cultural claims, so it probably wouldn’t count even if proven.

Even if Nashville doesn’t lead with the most churches, I’ve always said that one of this city’s chief exports is Jesus. God’s only Son gets shipped, bused, couriered, radioed, televised, faxed, e-mailed, and, if need be, dropped like a bomb from twenty thousand feet in places all over the world because of what happens here in Nashville. In many ways, we are God’s command center. His Pentagon. His newer Jerusalem.

With a push of a button, we can have a million Bibles dropped in a remote location in China. With a phone call or two, we can get a person carrying some very good news to show up on your doorstep, like Publishers Clearing House. The only catch is, you have to die before you’re able to afford that mansion you’ve always dreamed of.

Jim and I walked out of the sauna to cool off. He sat on one of the benches, and I went over to the water fountain.

“So tell me why you thought moving to Nashville would make it easier to be a Christian,” I said.

He laughed. “Because Christians are everywhere. I thought it would be amazing to be in a city where Jesus is as much a part of the culture as Dolly and Cracker Barrel.”

I laughed. “Okay, I get that. I’ve probably been there at some point in my life.”

“I also thought it would make being a pastor a lot easier. I mean, back home I would never have had this kind of conversation with somebody at the gym. Here, it happens every time I work out. It’s almost annoying. Sometimes it feels like we’re playing church. It’s difficult to explain.”

“But I understand what you’re saying.”

I’d been looking for a way to ask about the tattoo, but with no open window, I just blurted, “Jim, you have to tell me the deal with the tattoo.”

“You mean you don’t like it?” He laughed. “Man, I was young. I guess it was my way of sharing the truth about Jesus without having to say anything.”

“And that truth would be what? That Jesus is a flamethrower? Puff, the Magic Dragon?”

“Dude, I was an idiot back then. Now, I’m embarrassed to go to a public pool where people who don’t know me can see me without a shirt. I’m scared to death somebody will take it seriously.”

“I kind of did. It’s one of the most awful tattoos I’ve ever seen. I’d call that ‘doctor’–you know, the one who advertises on 107.5–and have that thing removed.”

I headed back to the sauna for another round. For a few minutes, I sat there alone, thinking about my conversation with Jim.

I wasn’t a pastor, but I had been to church more times than I could count, and I had lived in Nashville for a while, so I knew something about what he felt. At first, this town feels like a shot of faith in the arm.

When I first moved here, I thought it was energizing to be a part of a community where you were odd if you didn’t believe in Jesus. I felt at home. Even alive at times. But I started thinking about it too much, which led me to wonder if I was just filling a role in a Stepford-type reality.

Jim opened the sauna door, stepped inside, and sat down. He didn’t say anything, so I didn’t either.

My mind wandered back to a service I attended at one of Nashville’s largest churches a year or so after moving here. I hadn’t really wanted to go, but a friend begged me. “It’s our annual Harvest Festival on Sunday,” he told me. “You’ll love it. Please come. God always shows up on Harvest Sunday.”

Against my better judgment, I agreed to go with him. I didn’t want to miss an event that God had in his Day-Timer. Taking our seats in the balcony, my friend said, “They’re expecting something like fifteen thousand people. An extra service had to be added. Just think about how many people will be saved today.” He shook his head like people do at the circus while watching the trapeze act or when Spider-Man shows up. My friend was anticipating acrobats and special effects.

By the time the choir filled the loft, the room was packed, and the orchestra began playing an old hymn. I knew the song from the first notes.

“Bringing in the Sheaves.” I used to sing it when I was a kid. Back then, I knew every word, but I didn’t understand what they meant until much later.

The choir began singing the first verse.

Sowing in the morning,
Sowing seeds of kindness…

Hearing that old song reminded me of the time my father and I went to a neighbor’s farm and picked a bushel of sweet corn right off the stalks. The farmer had a lengthy driveway. As we drove over the bumpy gravel, Dad pointed out a golden wheat field.

“That wheat is ready to harvest, Buck.” My father’s eyes brightened any time he saw a ripened field of wheat, corn, or anything edible. “You know, when I was a kid, harvest was one of my favorite times of the year. Workers came from all over the county and helped us bundle up the wheat into sheaves. It was such an important day for us, sort of our payday. I remember Daddy being so particular about his crop, making sure those workers got every piece of wheat in that field. He’d get so mad when somebody wasn’t doing a good job; he’d go behind the workers and pick up whatever they left.”

My friend’s pastor only mentioned the word harvest once during his sermon. He didn’t talk about wheat fields and never mentioned a sheave. He asked, “Have you given any thought to what will happen on Judgment Day?”

Then he directed the sermon toward the members of his church. “Church, souls are being lost every single day. Why? Because we aren’t doing our job. We aren’t out harvesting God’s crop. People are going to get left behind because of you and me.”

I sank back into my pew, my heart feeling anxious. I’d heard that same message a million times, it seemed, but rather than making me feel hopeful, on that day the Good News scared me. I thought about my grandfather. Even he didn’t want to leave any wheat in the field.

I could only imagine God feeling the same way.

Jim jarred me out of my thoughts. “You think this is what hell feels like?”

“You talking about the sauna or living in Nashville?”

He smiled. “The sauna.”

“Then I doubt it. I like this too much.”

“Well, I guess I’d better get going. I have a meeting with my pastor tonight. He’s convinced that I don’t speak in tongues.”

“And that’s a problem?”

“Of course–we’re Pentecostals. It’s what we do.”

“Sounds like your church might have a little baggage.” My grin faded. “But who am I to judge? I’m still unpacking my own.”

Excerpted from Churched by Matthew Paul Turner. Copyright© 2008 by Matthew Paul Turner. Excerpted by permission of WaterBrook Press, a division of Random House, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photo-copying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.

hail to the 'thief'?

2008-08-03T23:23:00.004-05:00

Sorry guys for deleting this post, but it just isn't worth the drama.

good record. period.

2008-08-03T20:14:00.003-05:00

Brandon Heath's What If We releases on August 19. Heath's a fantastic songwriter and that's what makes this new record worthy of your $9.99...

elias @ three weeks

2008-08-03T16:58:00.002-05:00

Right in the middle of video, Elias burps...

holy feline

2008-07-30T17:15:00.004-05:00

Special thanks to Stephanie for this story!

As soon as I watched this video, I got up off the couch and ran outside to see if I could find the furry stray cat that my neighbor feeds. It took me awhile, but when I finally found the little fellow, I was disappointed that my local cat didn't have any Messianic markings on his fur. Which I figured could mean that he was Satan's cat!

Then one of my neighbors came out and asked me what I was doing.

"I'm looking for Jesus," I told her.

"On that ole cat?" she asked.

I nodded.

"There's no way that cat is from Jesus," she snarled. "That little thing is a b*tch!"

"What?" I said, "That's a dog?"

"No, it's mean!"

"Oh."

So, with that said, please, if you see a black-and-white feline on the west side of Nashville, please beware! It's a Devil cat, and while I couldn't find Jesus's face in its fur, between you and me, I do think I saw Chris Tomlin's.

Scary stuff.

(And for the record, the face on that cat might also be Jerry Garcia. Which might mean a sign that those people in Indiana should start wearing tye died. I don't know. Maybe.)

third day has a new album out... oh boy!

2008-07-30T08:02:00.006-05:00

Did you see them on Leno? Did you run out and buy the new CD? I bet you did. You stayed up late and bought it on iTunes just after midnight, didn't you?

Be honest.

OK, here's a confession: I don't like Third Day. I know, I know... It's true. And yes, I do love Jesus. Admitting you dislike Third Day is sort of like saying you don't like the Book of Zechariah. But I am certain that if I had ever really read the Book of Zechariah, I would like it MUCH more than I like Third Day. Oh, yes. That's almost biblical. That's how true it is.

Now, I must admit that Mac Powell is a good singer, and if he were to go solo, I might listen to a song or two. But Mac is the nice one in the boy band, and from my vantage point, unworthy of being in Third Day.

That's just my opinion. Others might disagree. Others might think he fully deserves to be in Third Day. But I don't. He's better than that.

What do you think of Third Day?

For the record, I don't like Spam either. But I do like Julie Andrews and George Michael, at least better than I like Third Day.

god's ideal...

2008-07-29T10:46:00.002-05:00

Of course, this might cause some of the more skeptical among us to ask: If that was his "original plan" why then did he create Satan? That stupid tree? Penises? You know, all of the "problem" areas...

Oh well. Maybe we'll know someday.

"worship" a short sermon by pete wilson

2008-07-29T09:40:00.000-05:00

Sync_Worship part1 from Matthew Singleton on Vimeo.

elias jude sounds like the name of a rock star to me...

2008-07-28T11:31:00.003-05:00