bryan's blog [beta]

some of the tote bags aren't bad either but i've found that red rock merch tends to look shitted

2009-07-08T23:32:00.005-04:00

the one item i'd buy from the just-launched, totally offcial michaeljacksonmerch.com would be the 'dangerous' sleep mask. it's one of the few items that isn't disgustingly christian audigier, but more importantly it's the only item that's directly related to 'dangerous.' that's my favorite michael jackson album of all time, as it perfectly epitomizes that underrated, beautifully overproduced sound of early '90s pop music that i adore so much. of course, i'd never wear this mask to sleep or otherwise, but i'd certainly put it somewhere where i'd see it. it reminds me of God's dita mask in a way, which, coincidentally, came out around the same era. i remember owning 'dangerous' and staring at that fabulously gaudy album cover for hours, those eyes the only glimpse of michael on the whole thing. i'll never forget that, that album, or him.

their video for 'this boy's in love' is amazing too but it's in a way that has nothing to do with dance

2009-05-04T14:11:00.002-04:00

i can't stand their stupid-ass fashion sense, but every now and then the presets hit it out of the ballpark with their music videos. i caught 'if i know you' on the best show on television, 'newnownext' on logo, the other night, and it stuck with me for days after. i'm a sucker for NON-hip hop dance videos, the kinds that utilize the modern dance i studied in college. the kinds that actually use dance to SAY SOMETHING, instead of just showing off stupid skills. i love this clip. a lot. it's beautiful sad.

he was also in that '300' lame film spoof but i dunno if that was his real body so yeah i dunno

2009-05-02T05:29:00.001-04:00

dang, have you seen 'kröd mändoon and the flaming sword of fire' on comedy central? the ads for it have been plastered around new york city for WEEKS. billboards... buses... taxis... telephone booths... i haven't seen an episode yet even though i have them all saved, because i've been too busy studying and jogging and sleeping and hanging out with friends and catching up on other shows like 'newnownext' and 'the view.' is 'kröd' even worth watching? apparently the show is really gay-friendly or something? what's REALLY gay-friendly for certain is kröd mändoon himself. mmm... sean maguire. he's fiiiiine! is his sword the flaming one? is his beard as hot as it is in the advertisements? does he mention me in the show? should i even bother watching this shizz? am i alive?

God photo of august 2008

2009-04-19T17:45:00.004-04:00

a SUPER rare pic of God preggers with lourdes (and Her brother chris in the background). i used this photo back in august for the invite of the 50th b-day party i threw for Her (an invite that photoshopped myself and bunnies lovingly blasting out of Her tummy), but i never actually posted the original pic on here. i loves it lots
(swiped from boy culture, i think?)

ALL BUNNY TEACHINGS MUST BE REMEMBERED AND OBEYED, PART 49

2009-04-12T13:52:00.005-04:00

in honor of BUNNY DAY today i'd like to tip my bunny-eared cap towards one of my favorite INNOCENT BABY BUNNY ANGELS of all time, the bunny of the parisian metro a.k.a. le lapin du métro parisien!! of course he is very controversial since he is IN PAIN because he is getting his hand smashed in the doors of a paris subway car, but what makes up for it is that he is sacrificing himself to this momentary pain in order to educate the public about proper metro-riding etiquette. AND EDUCATION IS BEAUTIFUL. plus there are a zillion of him stickered around the entire underground system there, so his omnipresence is very representational of how i feel when i go out into the world and feel bunny angels everywhere i go, guiding me with love to the light. a couple months ago i saw that there was a facebook fan page dedicated to him and you know i became a fan of that bitch in a snap. YOU SHOULD TOO THANKS.

ALL BUNNY-INSPIRED DISH RACKS MUST BE PURCHASED IMMEDIATELY, PART 48

2009-04-11T19:09:00.001-04:00

i can't believe someone invented something that fuses two of my deepest passions together: INNOCENT BABY BUNNY ANGELS AND WASHING DISHES! dutch by design has done just that with designer chris koens's dish rack, which features an outline of a darling, innocent baby bunny angel who pleasantly keeps your squeaky-clean dishes company as they dry. I LOVE IT AND WANT IT even though i already have a dish rack that's already built into my sink and stuff. it doesn't matter though cuz the power of bunny angels would make me rip out that rack in order to make this one wherque! OMFG BUNNY DAY IS TOMORROW YES YES YES YOU WILL ALL EXPERIENCE THE XXX-PLOSIVE BUNNY ANGEL RAPTURE VERY SOON!!!!

my hair idols, follicle #2

2009-02-05T20:31:00.003-05:00

i dunno how they look now, but back in 1996, producer/drummer butch vig's bangs were amazing. ESPECIALLY in garbage's 'stupid girl' video. his floppiness in that clip totally inspires me to this day. just watch for yourself: for the most part, he's there on the drums in the shadows, but then his hair suddenly explodes into the light, and in your face, at 1:10, 1:57, 2:56, and 4:17. that last bit at 4:17, especially, always sticks with me. always. like buttah.

luxury God item of the year

2009-01-25T13:38:00.003-05:00

want.

best of 2009

2009-01-01T00:00:00.025-05:00

last updated: 11/15

songs
1) nomi & deep red - 'fun girl'
2) rupaul - 'cover girl (put the bass in your walk)'
3) the presets - 'if i know you'
4) annie - 'my love is better'
5-6) katy perry - 'thinking of you'/'waking up in vegas'
7) camera obscura - 'french navy'
8) holy ghost! - 'i will come back'
9) enrique iglesias - 'takin' back my love' feat. sarah connor
10) britney spears - '3'
11) bt - 'rose of jericho'

albums
1) tiga - 'ciao!'
2) u2 - 'no line on the horizon'
3) zoot woman - 'things are what they used to be'
4) the whitest boy alive - 'rules'
5) gossip - 'music for men'
6) freemasons - 'shakedown 2'
7) peaches - 'i feel cream'
8) phoenix - 'wolfgang amadeus phoenix'
9) miss kittin & the hacker - 'two'

remixes
1) God - 'celebration' (benny benassi remix)
2) mr. dyf - 'hold on' feat. shena (freemasons club mix)
3) moby - mistake (lifelike remix)
4) aeroplane - 'whispers' (hercules & love affair mix)
5) starsailor - 'tell me it's not over' (stuart price remix feat. brandon flowers)
6) lady gaga - 'paparazzi' (filthy dukes mix)
7) la roux - 'in for the kill' (twelves remix)
8) miami horror - 'don't be on with her' (treasure fingers remix)
9) sneaky sound system - 'it's not my problem' (thin white duke remix)
10) depeche mode - 'wrong' (thin white duke remix)
11) calvin harris - 'flashback' (eric prydz remix)
12) florence and the machine - 'you got the love' (the xx remix)

retro tunes
1) the whitest boy alive - 'burning'
2) adam lambert - 'the tracks of my tears'
3) outsiders - 'keep this fire burning'
4) amy macdonald - 'this is the life'
5) jazon mraz - 'i'm yours'
6) adam lambert - 'whole lotta love'
7) lio - 'banana split'
8) starship - 'we built this city'

films
1) 'star trek: regression'
2) 'inglorious bastards'
3) 'da baader meinhof komplex'
4) 'terminator salivation'
5) 'x-men origins: hugh & ryan get it on!'
6) 'brunö'
7) 'normal activity'
8) 'angels & kings'

tv shows
1) 'rupaul's drag race'
2) 'melrose place'
3) 'the celebrity apprentice 2'
4) 'the real world: brooklyn'
5) 'nyc prep'
6) 'the comedy central roast of joan rivers'
7) 'the beautiful life: tbl'
8) 'miami social'

i also love anything cammy-oriented and also that one tee that has all the 'sfii' characters on it

2008-07-21T22:59:00.004-04:00

frequent trips to the nintendo store in rockefeller center only make me wanna wear too-small video game tees everywhere i go even more. my favorite character of all time is, obviously, 'street fighter ii''s chun-li, who i can destroy anyone and everyone with, including YOU. i was browsing online when i came across this AMAZING 'I GOT MORE KICKS THAN CHUN-LI' shirt by some store called once upon a time in ny. I WANT IT SO BAD. i should prolly just go to the store itself or something and buy it there, huh? we'll see. I WANT IT. also, i like how a dude is modeling it on the site. bwa! a DUDE! and i like how it's considered 'urban clothing' or something. the hell? is it cuz it has to do with 'street fighting'?

ALL BUNNY-CENTRIC PIXAR SHORTS MUST BE BOOTLEGGED ON YOUTUBE, PART 47

2008-07-13T16:47:00.002-04:00

WHY DIDN'T ANYONE WARN ME ABOUT 'PRESTO', THE SHORT BEFORE 'WALL-E'??? starring a clever INNOCENT BABY BUNNY ANGEL who gives an evil magician exactly what he deserves, it is MY FAVORITE MOVIE OF THE YEAR THUS FAR. i love pixar and how sympathetic they are to the plight of bunnykind. THEY JUST WANNA EAT AND BE RECOGNIZED, DAMNIT! i found the entire short on youtube and i'm sure it'll get yanked from there soon, SO WATCH IT NOW. i don't even remember what happened in 'wall-e', i was so overwhelmed by the power of the most entertaining bunny of the year, ALEX AZAM! YAYAYAY!

God photo of the week

2008-07-06T23:42:00.003-04:00

i love it when Her right eye gets all wonky.
(swiped from drownedmadonna.com, obviously)

i'm also really liking cut copy even though their videos are kinda lame and their album is just okay

2008-07-04T03:12:00.005-04:00

i'm going crazy for anything ladyhawke right now, anything i can get my dance-hungry little hands on. there's the cool, wolf-friendly video for the addictive single 'paris is burning,' that song's incredible electro-savvy remix by cut copy (mp3) and an AMAZING italo disco-esque track the band (or is it just one woman?) did with australian dance duo pnau called 'embrace' (mp3). all three are blowing my mind as we speak. they're fun and dancey and, like, friends with peaches. i like it when things are fun and dancey and, like, friends with peaches. la la lu lu.

who wouldn't wanna sink your teeth into one of those things? not to mention the burger OH SNAP!

2008-05-20T01:42:00.009-04:00

dang, did you watch oprah this week? that 'favorite things for summer' episode? my favorite thing on it was chef jeff o'neill, the goateed, handsome, soft-spoken, bear-like, trump-bankrolled inventor of oprah's favorite turkey burger ever. dude, look at how handsome he is! you know that trump MUST have given him a HUGE raise down at the mar-a-lago resort after scoring such a mind-boggling publicity coup by simply cooking the right thing at the right party. the segment was seriously 15 full minutes all about the burger, complete with massive oprah gushings about its taste and even security guarding a suitcase with the recipe in it... all that, and the audience didn't even get to taste the damn thing at the end! trump didn't even have to shell out for freebies! i wanna have chef jeff's babies!

pop culcha math, lesson 17

2008-05-10T11:10:00.000-04:00

/

=

God photo of the week

2008-05-09T14:08:00.002-04:00

yes.
(swiped from elle.com)

pop culcha math, lesson 16

2008-05-05T17:56:00.003-04:00

-

≠

i made shit like this when i was like 10 or something and my talented german aunt helped me

2008-03-31T23:10:00.007-04:00

apparently amigurumi is all the rage. they're knitted dolls of animals and anime characters or something. some dork made 'star wars' amigurumi and i think they're really cute. i wanna eat them. my favorite is obviously the slave leia one. i loved slave leia cuz she killed fat aliens and looked amazing doing so. i hated how they never made an action figure of her in that outfit. i only had the leia figure of the 'empire strikes back' snow look with the heavy clothes and the braid curled up behind her head. it was boring as shit. i also wanted an oola action figure but of course that wish never really had a chance in hell of coming true. dumb-ass, homophobic, boring-ass toy makers.

it's kinda, like, a retro-sexy '70s gay-clone aquaman look or something, and i enjoy that very much

2008-03-28T14:10:00.009-04:00

i was flipping through some magazines of mine when i came across the 'sandy sqiure' caricature above. woof. i couldn't stop staring at it, so of course i went online to the old spice hair/body metrics profiler. i entered myself and got the freshmanopian or something. lies.

God photo of the week

2008-03-21T11:41:00.002-04:00

one of Her best photos in a while. i'm always a sucker for Her 'in ecstasy' poses
(swiped from boyculture)

ALL 'ART' DEPICTING BUNNY CARNAGE MUST ITSELF BE CARNALLY DESTROYED, PART 46

2008-03-20T01:41:00.000-04:00

i was walking around my neighborhood minding my own business WHEN SUDDENLY I LOOK INTO A GALLERY AND THERE'S AN INNOCENT BABY BUNNY ANGEL SPEWING BLOOD ON A WALL WITH A HUMAN FIST RAMMED THROUGH IT! HUH?! WHA?!? HUH?!?! apparently this horrid, perverse display is considered 'art,' and while i obviously agree since i believe everything is art, really, I MUST DECLARE HOW UTTERLY OFFENDED I AM. artist daniel joseph martinez has officially declared war on all of bunnykind. MAY THE LONG-EARED MASSES RISE FROM THEIR HOLES, CAGES, AND MY LOINS (I BIRTH THEM ON A REGULAR BASIS, YA KNOW) AND TRIUMPH IN THEIR FURRY FURY FOR JUSTICE!!!

USING BUNNIES TO HAWK COMPUTERS IS FUNNER THAN USING DREW'S BOYF, PART 45

2008-03-08T22:57:00.002-05:00

amy sedaris has long been a vocal advocate for INNOCENT BABY BUNNY ANGELS, so it's nice to see her utilizing her powers of good and casting a few of them in this commercial for microsoft word 2007, or something. the clip doesn't make me laugh out loud or anything, which is sad, but it does make me happy that the pure, peaceful and fun nature of bunnykind finally gets the chance to shine!

ALL ICONIC BUNNY SHIRTS MUST BE WORN FOR THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE TO SEE, PART 44

2008-03-07T19:10:00.008-05:00

i really really really wanna own a playboy daft punk shirt cuz it brilliantly fuses the iconic daft punk heads with the iconic INNOCENT BABY BUNNY ANGEL playboy heads... but i have no idea where to purchase one (and i kinda like the pipettes one too?)!!! the official website says to check back 'in march for info on upcoming rock the rabbit shopping events at bloomingdale's locations near you!' um... but, like, ISN'T IT MARCH NOW HELLEAUX!!!?? WHY ARE THEY DENYING ME BUNNYKIND PRODUCTS TO WEAR AND EXPOSE TO THE UNIVERSE? why is playboy being so mean and homophobic and bunny-phobic and overall hateful?!?!?

God photo of the week

2008-03-06T02:08:00.001-05:00

i love it when She stuffs Her mouth with shit and Her eyes are closed.
(swiped from martha stewart's blog (!!!))

i also think the large one in this cycle may actually have a shot of winning this shit for once?

2008-03-05T23:48:00.000-05:00

the judges on 'america's next top model' are totally, like, ignorant. they keep making fun of how this cycle's anya talks. WHY DON'T THEY UNDERSTAND THAT IT IS A HAWAIIAN ACCENT, YOU KNOW, SINCE SHE COMES FROM HAWAII AND SHIT? yes, there are hawaiian accents. maybe next time they go to the aloha state on their rich-ass vacations, they should try stepping out of their fancy-schmancy resorts and try actually mingling with locals and experiencing REAL hawaiian culture and REAL hawaiian accents. it's such a retarded, tired plotline on 'antm''s part. why make fun of how someone speaks? bitch can't control where she grew up!