It's All About Lee

2003-02-26T17:25:00.000-05:00

I have a new Lee journal. I will leave this one up for a bit, but probably won't update it much.

Come see the new one at livejournal. There's not much there yet, but there will be. *g*

2003-02-25T19:05:00.000-05:00

I talked to my dear friend, M., today on the phone. She still hasn't seen any of Lee's work, despite my rather desperate attempts to get her to watch Oz. I told her about the Oz finale and recapped the BK story for her. Despite my sadness over the story, I was all revved up talking about Lee. You should have heard me. I was positively oozing excitement. I love talking about that man! *g*

I told M that one of these days, I am going to gather all my Oz DVDs and tapes and drive up to her house in New Jersey and show her some really good Beecher scenes - the ones that don't have too much violence. M. hates to watch violent t.v. shows and movies, which is why she never tried to watch Oz. I told her about ``Shot in the Heart'' and suggested she look for it in the video store. She might, depending on her mood. She can't watch depressing movies when she feels depressed. I'm the same way.

For the most part, M. and I have very similar tastes in movies, television and music, so I just know she's going to love Lee. I'm really excited about showing her his work. I have to make those plans soon.

~*~*~

I just spoke to Danielle on the phone. She is on her way home from the book signing. It sounds like Lee was in his usual, crazy, smart-ass mode. I can't wait until she writes up her report.

2003-02-24T09:12:00.000-05:00

Lee Tergesen's performance on last night's episode was brilliant. (I use that word a lot here don't I? Can't help it.) I especially loved watching the balcony scene. Despite the anger between Beecher and Keller, there was still tenderness and raw emotion. When Beecher told Keller he was death, Lee really let Beecher's emotions come through. From my POV, Beecher was absolutely torn up as he spoke the words. That's what Lee made me see and feel.

The only thing the really pissed me off was Beecher admitting to Sr. Pete that he was going to rat Keller out. That just seems so out of character to me. Even though he had a very good reason for doing so, the fact that he would manipulate the truth bothered me. I just didn't buy it. Not for a second. And I do recall saying on my list a week or so ago that Keller would never confess to those killings and from what Toby said, I was right. *g* Sorry, I just needed to point that out.

2003-02-23T14:32:00.000-05:00

Good news. Rami is not going curling after all, so I will be going over to her house to watch Oz. Yay! It makes me a little less nervous about watching tonight. By the time I get home, it will be too late to post anything about my reaction to the show. Guess it will have to wait until tomorrow.

Must keep chanting ``I still believe. I still believe. I still believe.''

2003-02-22T17:57:00.000-05:00

With all the BK fanfic I've been writing lately, Lee has been on my mind constantly. Well, Lee's face with Beecher's personality. LOL. You might be thinking, ``So what's new?'' That I always think about Lee and that's true. I think about him daily, but these last few days, I've had this clear vision of his face sort of hovering in the corner of my subconscious constantly. I am not sure if it's good or bad. Perhaps neither.

Part of me is dreading watching the last episode of Oz tomorrow, but part of me is anticipating it, too. I can't wait to see the BK scene where they talk. I heard about it, of course, but I want to see their facial expressions and hear their tones. I'm a little scared and I will be watching it alone. Rami has curling. :( P. will be here, but he will probably be sleeping, so I will essentially be alone. I need someone to commisserate with. Ah well.

2003-02-21T15:13:00.000-05:00

``I know what I know and I know I'd love to be ogled. Go ahead. Think of me as a piece of meat. Undress me with your eyes. Get hot for my bod. I'm not asking you I'm telling you.'' -- Chett in Show Chett.

Uh, okay, Lee. Happy to oblige. ;)

This quote has been running in my head all day with all this worry about not being able to find my tape. I wonder how much input Lee had in this episode. Was it his idea? Did he suggest some of the dialogue? Did he love doing this? I'm really curious. I'd probably never have the guts to ask him, though. Or would I? *eg*

2003-02-21T11:32:00.000-05:00

Well, I mailed off the Chett tapes to Chicago yesterday. Two tapes with a total of 19 Weird Science episodes on them. Should be enough to keep Mav's and LeahAnne's mind off the BK tragedy this coming Sunday night. They may have to stay up all night watching Chett's antics and won't that be fun?

Unfortunately, I did not find my tape with the Show Chett episode before I headed over to fed ex. *sniff* I have looked high and low for this tape and it is nowhere to be found. I had it out about a month ago to watch it, but it is nowhere near my t.v. Nor under it. It's not under my couch. It's not in my video cabinet and it's not on my desk. I didn't lend it to anyone and my boys assure me they have not touched it. *sigh* What am I to do? Whoa is me.

2003-02-20T12:16:00.000-05:00

It might surprise some people that when I created my Tobyfan nickname I had not yet seen an episode of Oz. I actually first came up with the nickname when I was registering for a West Wing message board. Everyone had nicknames and I wanted one. LOL. Toby Ziegler, who is played by Richard Schiff, was (and still is) my favorite character on that show, so I thought it appropriate. I even created an email addy using it for the same reason. And even though I still watch West Wing, my focus on Richard Schiff and *that* Toby lasted about six months.

Then I saw CLaK. You know that story. I figured, Tobyfan fit in well with the Oz fandom, too, so I continued to use that email address and nickname, although not when writing my fanfic. I like to see my name on my writing and the world be damned. *g* Now, when I used my Tobyfan nickname for my blogs and such, it makes me think solely of Beecher and Lee. Just an fyi in case anyone cares. ;)

Time to head over to fed ex and mail some Chett tapes to my list sibs!

2003-02-19T19:51:00.000-05:00

I watched ``The Shot'' today. Or, rather, I fast-forwarded through most it. What a bad movie. Although I certainly wanted to see Lee's two tiny scenes, I also wanted to figure out which actress in the movie was Lee's first wife, Tanya Lewis. She is only credited as ``waitress.'' I think I figured out which one she is, though. Maybe I could send a question to Ask Lee? *snort* In her credits on IMDB.com, she is only listed in this movie and one episode of Weird Science, which I do not have on tape. Ah well. I have only seen one picture of her but I think I picked her out in the movie in an early scene inside a diner. She only had about three lines and she was cranky. LOL. She had long, brown, wavy hair and she was pretty. She's no Leslie, though. ;)

Lee's scenes, although brief, were fun to watch. In the second one, he delivered one of his lines in a way that reminded me of the hole scene in The Tip when he said, ``Ssssscott Ross.'' Perhaps I've been watching too much Lee Tergesen stuff? Nah.

I am feeling my Oz depression starting to lift today. Not sure why, but I am happy about it. I wrote some more of ``Promise You'' and that may have been part of it. Also had a fun phone chat with one of my list sibs, which put a big smile on my face. Plus, you know, I thought of Lee and that always makes me happy.

2003-02-18T12:12:00.000-05:00

I never thought I'd get tired of talking about Oz and Beecher and Keller, but the discussion on my list is starting to tire me out. Lots of people are just repeating themselves in a vain attempt to get others to agree with them. I don't get it really. Why is one opinion more valid than another? I'm all for spirited discussion, but it's starting to get snarky and a few of the posters who seem to want to egg everyone on just need to shut up and stop posting for a bit. Many of us are feeling tired and sad and betrayed by Tom Fontana and I don't think any amount of arguing is going to make us change our minds.

So, onto more pleasant topics.

Two days ago, I watched ``Wayne's World II,'' my favorite of the two WW movies. I love the scene where the guys are spying on Cassandra, get caught and try to escape by running to a gay bar where they end up dancing to ``YMCA.'' Lee is wearing a sailor suit in the scene and looks quite adorable. He gives a couple of heart-stopping smiles while he's dancing to the music. I laugh out loud every time I watch that scene. And those nice, snug white pants he wears don't hurt the eyes either. *g*

When I was in Chicago last summer, I was searching out sites in the city where movies had been filmed. I had found a really helpful website before I went and had notes on places to go. My husband and kids thought I was little nutty. But I found the area where the guys drove down the road while singing ``Bohemian Rhapsody.'' It wasn't really recognizable because there had been many changes in the years since it was filmed but I took pictures anyway. I tried to convince P. we needed to go find another WW's film site, but it was far away and he wasn't convinced. Ah well. It was still fun.

2003-02-17T11:20:00.000-05:00

Looking at last night's Oz episode purely from a performance point of view, I think Lee had a very good night with one minor exception. I am just flabbergasted at the ``I can still cry speech.'' It had a false ring to it and maybe it was supposed to. I didn't like it. Lee should have told Tom to go fuck himself and refused to say it. *shudder* I don't get why these actors are so loyal to Tom but that's a rant for another day.

I loved watching the scene on stage between Lee and Chris - not so much for the content as for the chemistry between the actors. They're like two professional dancers who can predict each other's moves without fail. They work together gracefully and beautifully. It's a treat to watch them, even if they're given crap to do. Who else could have even made that foolish dialogue even remotely watchable? No one, I say, except Lee and Chris.

2003-02-16T10:23:00.000-05:00

I read some more details of the Oz finale from a list sib who actually saw it. *sigh* I feel sad and hollow. And, once again, I had trouble sleeping over an episode of Oz - one that I haven't even seen yet! I woke up in the middle of the night in one of those weird half-dream/half-awake states. I kept hearing/seeing all the debate comments from the list sort of floating through my head and I kept thinking of Beecher and Keller and my whole body was full of tension. It was a weird experience. I drifted in and out of this weird state for a few hours. I woke up in the morning feeling tired.

I don't feel angry. I just feel disappointed. I expected one of them to die. I didn't expect them to kiss and make up before they did. I don't know what exactly I expected, but a little something more than more betrayal from both sides. Without having seen the finale, it's hard to say for sure, but it seems to me that Tom was trying to say that no matter how good their intentions, no matter how much they felt for each other, it was completely hopeless from the get go. So, what was the point of telling the story in the first place? Only Tom can say, I guess.

I am not even angry at Tom. He obviously finished the story *he* set out to tell. But I have to say, it makes me not want to watch any of his shows anymore. I don't want to get that heavily invested in characters again only to be heartbroken. I'm sorry, but it's just not worth the effort.

Still, I don't regret watching Oz or falling in love with Beecher and Keller for even a second. It was worth the ride, even if the ending is painful. Plus, I have met so many great people through the fandom whom I cherish. I will keep all my DVDs and homemade tapes of Oz and I'll watch them again - for Lee if nothing else.

2003-02-15T10:46:00.000-05:00

Well, I just read spoilers for the season finale of Oz, which I won't reveal here. But I feel surprisingly calm about the whole thing. I am not horrified or even surprised really, even though some of the plot endings are completely ridiculous. Of course, some details are lacking in the stuff I read at TWOP so I will really have to watch it before I can judge the final impact. A couple of the sibs pointed out that the BK story end is not as horrible as it could have been and that's true, considering where TF led them these last couple of weeks. But in the overall arc of the story, I'd say it kind of sucks. Still, I think writers can just dismiss it as a bad dream, which is what I fully intend to do. *g*

I would love to hear Lee's take on how this all turned out.

2003-02-14T08:34:00.000-05:00

A dear list pal and fellow blogger has asked me to make copies of a few Weird Science eps I have on tape. Since I don't have the double VCR thing set up, I'm heading over to Rami's on Monday and we're going to have a ChettFest! Yay! I haven't watched the tapes in awhile. Actually, my kids watch them more than I do. She only requested three eps (luckily, I have them all) but I have to add more, of course. And, OH, is it going to be fun deciding which episodes to put on there.

These are the episodes she wants: Show Chett (Chett works as a stripper), Pirates (Chett sings) and Earth Boys are Easy (Chett is covered in whip cream by and alien who wants to eat him). All very nice selections. She also added Funhouse of Death after I suggested it. It's my SINGLE, FAVORITE Lee performance on Weird Science, which I have mentioned before.

I will have to add Strangers in Paradise, where Chett and Lisa get stuck on an island in the Bermuda Triangle. It has a nice glimpse of sensitive Chett at the end and I do so love that. I Dream of Genie also has a very sweet, touching moment at the end, as well. Rock Hard Chett has his playing a superhero named the Buttkicker and he has a huge BK on his chest. Foreshadowing! Hee!

Should be a fun Monday.

2003-02-12T08:30:00.000-05:00

I had a dream last night about Christopher Meloni (my fourth one). We had a nice, long chat over dinner. And who do you think we talked about? Or, I should say, who do you think *I* talked about? Lee Tergesen.

The dream started out with me and a group of friends hanging out with a musician friend who was in town for a concert at the Kennedy Center. He was supposed to be famous, but I didn’t recognize him at all. I kept hearing a Paul Simon song running in my head during the dream. The one that goes, ``lie la lie. lie la la lie li lie. Lie li lie...’’ I can’t remember the name of it.**

Anyway, we were all hanging out and he didn’t really want to go perform, but he did and then we met up again afterwards. He was hungry so we all decided to go to the mall and get something to eat. Christopher Meloni, who apparently knew MusicianGuy pretty well, stopped by his hotel room and we all asked him to join us.

So we were walking through the mall, trying to agree on what to eat. MusicianGuy and all my friends agreed to eat at a greasy burger joint. I didn’t want to, so I went off to order something at another restaurant and figured I’d eat with them at the public tables. On the way back from getting my order, I saw Christopher sitting at a table alone, eating. So I sat down with him. He was very polite and very nice but he wasn’t as engaging or warm as Lee is in person.

I started talking about Lee, who I’d just seen a few weeks before. Meloni had been at that gathering, too, so he did remember. I mentioned a conversation that had happened at the earlier gathering, but Christopher didn’t remember it. So I jogged his memory. As I told the story, we were interrupted twice by fans. He always said, ``Excuse me,’’ before talking to the fans or signing stuff and then turned his attention back to me. It could have been my own paranoia, but I sensed he wasn’t all that interested in our conversation.

Anyway, after that, we started talking about Oz and I said that many BK fans were quite upset at Tom Fontana over the storyline. He nodded and listened, but didn’t offer any information about what was going to happen. He seemed slightly more interested in this topic of conversation. He had that Stabler concentration expression on his face as he listened. I woke up around that time.

I thought it was kind of funny that here I had Christopher Meloni all to myself and I was talking about Lee. *g*

**I looked it up. It's called The Boxer and it's by Simon AND Garfunkel

2003-02-11T19:54:00.000-05:00

The Many Faces of Beecher

aka Anne's Favorites

Beecher in Love

Don't Fuck With Me Beecher

Crazy Beecher

Angsty Beecher - my personal favorite

Grieving Beecher

Martyr Beecher

Sarcastic, Drunken Beecher

Livid, Enraged Beecher

2003-02-10T13:19:00.000-05:00

I recorded Lee's episode of Duckman last night and finally got to watch it today. I've seen clips and screencaps before but it's not the same as watching the whole episode to understand what the heck is going on. He and his fellow actors from ``Weird Science'' were kidnapped by an evil character who wanted to bring down Duckman. So he was Chett, sort of. *g* There were some jokes about Weird Science and it's simple plots, but it was kind of cute. Anyway, I'm glad to finally have it in my collection. Now there's only four t.v. guest spots of his that I don't have.

~*~*~

Beecher only had about 4 minutes of screen time last night and I wasn't too happy about that. I think this is the briefest appearance this season. Still, Lee made an impact with the little time that he had. He always does.

Something is definitely off on Oz. Nothing is as it seems and everyone is acting weird. Beecher was supposedly chattering to everyone who would listen that Keller ratted him out. Huh? Highly unlikely he'd do that. And he wouldn't look at Keller while they argued, if you could even call it that. Beecher mainly said mean things to Chris in a very calm but not even menancing voice. Very weird. Where were the Beecher hysterics? Anger? Accusations? Something is definitely fishy in Oz land. Tom is playing with us and I don't think that's very nice.

2003-02-09T11:13:00.000-05:00

Lee was too funny on ``Breaking the Law'' last night. It's one of the few times on t.v. where he's been completely himself. Even his interview on that morning show didn't completely capture his funny, charming personality. Maybe it was too early in the morning. *g* But last night, we got the full, unadulterated Lee. And that was fun to watch.

I loved that he was wearing a shirt with Christopher Meloni's face on it and he never once even referred to it. He's too damn cute. The shirt had lots of writing on it, so I'm wondering if Chris signed it for him. I would LOVE to know what it says. I also really enjoyed his ad lib comments, of course. The man makes me laugh out loud!

My favorite quote: ``We pay extra for that where I come from.'' *g*

2003-02-07T10:28:00.000-05:00

There's this picture of Lee that Danielle took last Tuesday that I just love. It's actually a long picture of him with the bear in his pants, but I asked her to crop it for me so there was a close up of just his face. I LOVE the expression on his face here. Is he beautiful or what? It's hard for me to believe that I didn't notice his beauty when I first started watching Oz. Of course, I noticed his talent immediately, but it took me a little longer to really see how attractive he is. I must have been completely blind. *g*

2003-02-05T13:04:00.000-05:00

Since Sunday, my Oz list has more or less exploded with messages. I go off line for an hour and when I go back on line, I have like 30 new messages -- most about Beecher and Keller. I like it that way. I love the discussions about these two characters. I love it when people analyze what motivates them and make guesses about what's going to happen next. That is my favorite kind of post and there have been lots of them.

Most people's initial gut reaction was shock and horror over Keller's betrayal of Beecher. I was pretty upset myself, as I mentioned here. There was lots of blame thrown around at both of them. Some posters have even gone so far as to ``give up'' on Beecher and Keller as couple. I can understand that sentiment. Still, I think I've calmed down considerably since I first saw that preview with Keller calling the police on Beecher.

I think if this happened a year ago, I might have wanted to give up, too. But here's the thing, since I've met Lee, I look at Oz differently than I used to. Before, it was a fandom to get wrapped up in and think about constantly. Now, it's become more of a vehicle for Lee's talent. Don't get me wrong, I still love Oz and I do get involved in the stories, but I can take a step back now when it gets to be too much. And I only just realized that in the last week.

If Beecher does something to piss me off, I just remind myself that Lee is not Toby. He's not even remotely like Toby. Oz is just another program where Lee can showcase his talent. Having spent time in his company makes it easier for me to do that. That probably doesn't make any sense, but there it is. When Lee played a killer on CI, I didn't like the character, but I loved watching him perform the role. So, it's pretty much all about Lee and not about Toby. *g*

~*~*~

I showed my sister the the picture of Lee and I that Susan took. She says, ``He's kinda old.'' Excuse me?! This sister, btw, is 36, just 10 months younger than Lee. She also has this weird fixation on younger men. Her ex-husband is six years younger than her and was just 19 when they married. Every guy she's ever dated is younger than her by many years. Her last two boyfriends were in their 20s. If she meets someone older than her, she immediately dismisses him as being too old. I don't get it. Then she wonders why she keeps meeting immature losers who have low-paying jobs. Okay, end rant. LOL. Lee Tergesen too old. Pfftt. She's crazy. I think he looks fantastic. Big surprise there, I know.

She did eventually concede that he's cute. Well, duh.

2003-02-04T19:39:00.000-05:00

My New Favorite Lee Tergesen Quote
(as paraphrased by Chris Meloni)

From The Advocate:

``Look, just because you're uncomfortable with the sexuality going on here doesn't mean you have rain on our fucking parade.''

God, I love that man. He is *so* my hero. Of course, he was before, but you know what I mean. ;) He is just cooler than cool. He's pretty much the coolest. Meloni, too. They are so fucking adorable together.

2003-02-03T18:10:00.000-05:00

I'm moving rapidly out of post-Lee Tergesen syndrome and straight into withdrawal. I miss him!

Just found out today that Lee is going to be at the book signing for the Augustus Hill book on the 18th. Of course, I won't be able to go. It's too soon after this last trip. I was thinking he'd be in Florida filming the movie for awhile, but I was wrong. So, I'm going to miss another signing. Damn. Damn. Damn. Ah well. I'll get over it. I am sure there will be other chances to see him again this year. I'm thinking somewhere in the vicinity of July 8 would be nice. *g*

Several times today, something Lee said or did last Tuesday popped into my head and I got the biggest grin on my face. I mean, really big. Oddly enough, no one looked at me strangely as I walked through the grocery store with a huge smile. I guess they thought I just liked shopping.

2003-02-02T22:32:00.000-05:00

I am so completely over my anger toward Toby and all is right in the world. LOL. 4giveness was not as bad as I expected from what the seminar attendees told us. Toby was great during that visit. He even brought his baby socks. How sweet was that? He didn't talk about the teacher until Chris specifically brought her up. Yeah, he could have lied, but Chris would have known it. Toby can't lie to him. And when Chris asked Toby to bring the kids to visit, he said, yes, but said not right away. He certainly didn't shut him down like I was led to believe.

Toby didn't start to pull away from Chris until he asked him to do something illegal. Chris played him and played him good. So I'm mad at Chris again and that's okay. ;) Luckily, I took the few days since Tuesday to distance myself from this whole storyline and have decided that I am just going to enjoy it for the drama it brings. Nothing more. I am keeping my emotional distance. It takes too much out of me to get emotionally invested. Still, I'm glad I'm over the Toby anger. I don't like that. It doesn't feel right.

How great was Lee tonight? Wow. That scene in the warden's office? Very cool. And the scene with Chris, too. Very impressively done. I love AnguishedToby but I also love CoolLawyerToby cause he's fucking hot.

2003-02-02T19:34:00.000-05:00

I was visiting a former neighbor today, who has known about my Lee Tergesen obsession. She was surprised to hear it was still going on. She knows my strong interest in an actor usually wanes after several months. She saw me through my Terrence Mann and Richard Schiff obsessions and the beginning of Lee. Anyway, we were talking about Lee and she was still unaware of his work, so I was pointing out some things he's done, but she hasn't seen any of his movies. So I asked if she watched ER and she said yes, so I described Lee's episode and she remembered him in it! It made me happy for some strange reason. She said he was good on that episode. (Of course he was!) Anyway, that just made my day. :)

I also talked to my friend, M., today and told her about my trip to NYC. She was envious that I'd gotten to see a play. We used to go to plays together all the time when we both lived in the city. She lives in southern NJ and doesn't get up to the city as much as she'd like. I talked about Lee some more. I already knew she'd missed his ER episode (even though she watches the show all the time) so I asked her if she watched CI. No luck. Someday I am just going to drive up to her house with a bunch of Lee Tergesen tapes and get her just as hooked as I am. She and I often have very similar tastes in actors, music, t.v. shows, etc., so I know she's going to love him. She won't watch Oz though. She hates to watch graphic violence. Ah well.

2003-01-31T19:28:00.000-05:00

There's so many things I could be doing. Paying bills. Cleaning up the house. Doing laundry etc. But all I want to do is read about, write about, and think about Lee. *sigh* It's really quite pathetic. But I don't care because it makes me H-A-P-P-Y! I was going to post a nice pic Danielle sent me, but I have to resize it. Here's a link to it.

~*~

I was thinking yesterday about all those years I was devoted to Kevin Kline and I never even met him. I took no less than seven trips from D.C. to NYC to see him in plays over a 15-year period and I never once even tried to meet him. Never thought it was possible, I suppose. And now, here I've had the opportunity to meet Lee on many ocassions and had actual conversations with him. He's gone out of his way to make me feel special and I can't even begin to express the affection I have for him. I can't imagine any actor could ever take his place in my heart.