It's A Schmitty Life

Belated Merry Christmas!

2009-12-28T19:02:00.004-05:00

This is our annual family Christmas card. It portrays the Schmitty Kids as they should be...in all of their goofy glory!

Hope you all had a very Merry, Merry!!!

(I had full intentions of posting this on Christmas Eve and actually thought I had...but I guess that bottle of wine or so killed off those memory brain cells.)

This Guy Sees You When Your Sleeping Too

2009-12-22T15:28:00.011-05:00

Have you heard of the Elf on the Shelf? I never had up until about two weeks ago.

The Elf, one of Santa's helpers, makes his appearance in your home before the holidays. His sole responsibility is to report to Santa to let him know if the children of the household are worthy of the Nice List or not.

WOW!

I need me one of those! You'd think that the Schmitty Kids would be perfect angels before the arrival of the jolly old soul. But the closer we seem to get to Christmas, the more they seem to be begging for coal in their stockings.

I keep telling them that Santa is going to fly on by our house....laughing all the way!

Hey!

So, out I went to search for this Elf. I figured, I've tried everything else, what did I have to lose? I was desperate people. Desperate, I say!

I guess my kids are not the only ones with behavioral issues lately. The Elf on the Shelf was no where to be found. Sold out here, sold out there, sold out everywhere!

Dang.

But then I got to thinking. A sweet, little Elf, could he deter my strong willed brood from wreaking havoc?

BWAAHHHAHHHAA!

I told Mr. Schmitty that a light bulb had been flipped on in my evil mind. I've explained, in the past, about my children's fear of the dark and most anything scary, right?

"I couldn't find an Elf," I told my husband. "But I think I've come up with a more effective solution!"

"Oh yea?" He looked at me with a raised eyebrow.

He knows me too well.

"Yes, all I need to do is put on a Freddy Kruger costume and tell them, "Behave, or I'll be back!"

blink. blink.

"Oh come on!" I said, "You KNOW that would work!"

He's no fun.

Taking an Artistic Risk

2009-12-17T07:24:00.005-05:00

"Mommy! We made Dreidels today at school!" R. exclaimed.

"You did? Can I see it?" I asked.

She skipped over to the couch where she had thrown her backpack upon arriving home from school.

Smiling, obviously proud of her work, she skipped back to me. She was holding a card stock cutout in the shape of a Dreidel.

She turned her art toward me and said, "And Mommy, I even colored it red and green for Christmas!!"

Me thinks something was lost in translation.

Week 49 - “Pets Only!” Photo Challenge

2009-12-15T11:41:00.004-05:00

This is Ruby. After apparently taste testing some mud pies, our adorable pet looked at me with those sad puppy eyes; the expression was just begging me to let her inside.

Did she seriously think I was going to let her in the backdoor looking like THAT?!

Have Yourself a Merry Little White Lie

2009-12-13T20:13:00.004-05:00

Earlier this week, while the kids were in school, I began the task of Christmas gift wrapping. I stood at my kitchen island and got a jump on one of my least favorite jobs of the season.

Though a perfectionist, in most aspects of my life, I prefer to just get it done, as opposed to a perfectly adorned package. Well, at least where presents are concerned.

Heh.

As I cut, folded, and taped, I got lost in my own thoughts. I recalled the time when W. recognized that his gifts from Santa were wrapped in the paper that I had purchased from Target a few days earlier.

"Mommy, you must be Santa because you wrapped these!" He accused.

I, a true Believer who will NEVER, willingly, admit to any child that Santa is a fake, quickly concocted a story to ease his mind.

"I buy the wrapping paper for Santa," I explained. "If he put wrapped gifts on a sleigh and then flew them all around the world they'd be torn to shreds!"

He looked at me suspiciously, "He can't have enough time to wrap them at our house!"

"He doesn't do it silly! While he is eating the milk and cookies you left for him, his elves wrap the gifts!"

He smiled and the day was saved.

W. was also the one to ask me how Santa was able to get into our house because we didn't have a fireplace with a chimney.

Damn kid can't ever make it easy on me. Ahem.

Thus, the tradition of crafting a magic key began. I would cut the shape of a key from card stock and he would decorate it. He would then hang it on the mailbox on Christmas Eve. Only Santa was able to make the key work our lock. And then, in a puff of smoke, the key disappeared.

As we added children to our brood, we'd have three keys for Santa. The ~~lie~~ explanation was that Santa needed one from each child who lived in the house for the magic to work. The reality was that my kids couldn't work together on one key. A few years ago my Aunt gave the kids an actual "Santa Key" to hang outside before they go to bed.

And so, again, the spirit of St. Nick was preserved.

Now tell me, what's your holiday white lie?

Week 48 - “Sweet Dreams” Photo Challenge

2009-12-08T07:19:00.004-05:00

This picture looks so sweet. A girl and her puppy - fast asleep. I can only hope that her dreams were sweet. You see, this picture was taken on Halloween of 2007. After walking home from the elementary school, where her older brother was in a parade, the day went sour. We reached the front lawn and she just looked up at me, all adorable in her Ladybug costume, and proceeded to get sick all over herself. That was the beginning of her 24 hour stomach virus.

She missed Halloween.

Regardless, I still believe her dreams were sweet.....thinking of ALL of the candy her dear brothers collected for her that night.

For more great photos.....head on over to i ♥ faces!

Family Funnies

2009-12-06T20:30:00.003-05:00

I was standing in the bathroom, trying to apply enough makeup to look half way decent, when in came my shadow, otherwise known as my daughter.

She plopped down on the closed lid of the toilet and said, in a most normal conversational way, "Mom. T. told me that my breath sucks."

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Last year W. had to learn all of the state capitals. T. came across the flash cards we used and began to quiz W. to see if he still remembered them.

W. began really well, he quickly rattled off each capital. His voice was getting louder and more excited with each card that T. flipped toward him.

Suddenly he started to answer incorrectly. He was clearly getting frustrated, much to T.'s amusement.

T., who was turning over the cards, faster and faster, showed the "Lincoln" card for the state of Nebraska.

W.'s reply?

"ABRAHAM!"

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The Christmas cards began to roll in this week. I usually let the kids open them. They get so excited, especially by the photo cards. They love to see the faces of our friends and family.

The other day, R. was opening a batch and she said, "WOW! Mommy look at this family! It's so big!"

I glanced at the card and said, "Honey, that's the Baby Jesus and the Manger scene."

Thanks For The Reminder Carrie Underwood.....

2009-12-03T21:57:00.003-05:00

"What you got if you ain't got love?
The kind that you just wanna give away
It's okay to open up
Go ahead and let the light shine through
I know it's hard on a rainy day
You wanna shut the world out
And just be left alone
Don't run out on your faith

Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing
Is just a grain of sand
What you've been out there searching for forever,
Is in your hands
When you figure out love is all that matters, after all
It sure makes everything else
Seem so small

It's so easy to get lost inside
A problem that seems so big, at the time
It's like a river that's so wide
It swallows you whole
While you're sittin' round thinking about what you can't change
And worryin' about all the wrong things
Time's flying by, moving so fast
You better make it count, cause you can't get it back"

.....Sometimes I forget.

Week 47 - “We ♥ Tooshies” Photo Challenge

2009-12-01T07:11:00.005-05:00

This is going to be my first entry into the I ♥ Faces Photo Challenge. We ♥ Tooshies is the perfect subject for me. No, not because I'm an ass...but because it's a silly subject! (Be nice to me, would ya?! Sheesh!)

Anyway, this picture just cracks (no pun intended) me up. My little comedian, T., is doing the booty shake. The photo was taken this past May. We had our first hot day of the season so I set up the sprinkler outside. When the kids came home from school with some friends, they were thrilled, as you can see!

Like A Scene From A Cartoon

2009-11-25T20:02:00.003-05:00

Back in September, I wrote about W. and his studying, or lack thereof. I took some of your advice and backed off. Because as much as my controlling ways fought me, I know, deep down, that I must let him take control of his own school work.

If I didn't he'd never get through it.

So, reluctantly I took a backseat. I still question him to make sure his homework is done. I still ask if he has any quizzes or tests coming up that he needs to study for. But I let him be responsible for it all.

It's tough.

I started to see his grades falter. He still had passing grades for the most part, but I did see a few that were not quite up to par. I was given papers to sign and return. The teacher wanted proof that I knew of the substandard grade.

I told W. he needed to get a grip and take his work more seriously. I explained that the year would get harder, not easier. He needed to study for his tests. And better yet, he needed to KNOW when those tests were being given.

Apparently, THAT was a problem.

I became aware of THAT when I went through his papers and found a Science quiz that he never told me he had coming up.

Did you ever see the Spongebob episode entitled "No Free Rides"? Here's a clip:

Now, watch the episode again and imagine W. as Spongebob and Mrs. Puff as his Science teacher. Next replace Spongebob's boating test with W.'s quiz. And finally instead of a 6, think of a 4, as in 4%.

Yes, my son got a 4% on a quiz. How is that even possible?

Anissa

2009-11-18T16:23:00.005-05:00

This community, sometimes called the Blogosphere, never ceases to amaze me. When a fellow blogger is in need, this Internet Family, joins together at record speed to offer support.

Quite honestly, it blows my mind.

I've only been blogging for less than two years. That's not a long time. I haven't been lucky enough to meet any bloggers in real life. Though I hope to some day. I have however, witnessed the outpouring of love that is forever being extended in so many ways.

Many read, in horror, when Nie Nie and her husband were in a life altering airplane crash during August of 2008. Then hearts were broken with the loss of a little girl named Maddie. And then again when Thalon was taken too soon.

Each time, this Internet Family, sprang into action. No questions asked.

Truly incredible.

Today, I signed onto Facebook. I saw status updates that Anissa of #FreeAnissa had suffered a massive stroke on Tuesday. I couldn't believe it.

Anissa?

The always funny, upbeat Anissa? That strong woman who has already endured rehabilition for a previous stroke. The unbelievable mom who recently posted about her youngest child, Peyton, being one year, cancer free?

Yes. That Anissa.

Again, this Internet Family is doing what it does best. It's taking care of it's own.

Please send prayers, happy thoughts, good vibes, whatever you can to Anissa and her family. And if you can help out in other ways, please visit Aiming Low to find out how.

The Older Woman

2009-11-17T13:31:00.006-05:00

"Mom, J. and I met two girls today. They want to be our girlfriends!" W. informed me.

I smiled and asked, "Oh really? What are their names?"

"I don't know.....but they are 7th graders!!" He gushed.

Ah. Older women.

I figured he'd probably never see these girls again. And if they did cross paths in school, I was pretty sure he'd be ignored. I mean, he's ONLY in 6th grade and those girls are practically teenagers!

Heh.

A few days later, I got the dreaded phone call from the nurse's office. Ever since the media freaked America out with news of the Swine Flu, I've been waiting for the shoe to drop in the Schmitty household.

"Mrs. Schmitty, I've got W. here and he isn't feeling well...blah, blah, blah." I heard the nurse say as my mind drifted off into thoughts of vomit, fevers, and quarantine.

"I'll be right there."

The nurse's office was packed to the rafters. There were children EVERYWHERE. I motioned for W. to come along and noticed that he had a ginormous, shit-eating grin on his face. I also noticed there was a blond-haired girl, sitting in a chair, with a similar expression.

As we walked into the hallway, I said, "Who is that?"

"The girl I told you about, the one I met this weekend!"

So begins my son's wooing of this girl, whose name, unfortunately sounds exactly like that of a stripper.

He has "friended" her on Facebook; an account he has only used, thus far, to play Bejeweled Blitz. He also, and I quote, "Sees her EVERY.SINGLE.MORNING!"

"Have you spoken to her yet?" I asked, quite amused at how smitten he is with her.

"No."

"Has she spoken to you?"

"No."

"Do you just ignore each other?"

"No. we just smile at each other!"

That's it baby, take your time.

They Worked Hard For The Money

2009-11-09T13:02:00.005-05:00

My boys and their friend decided they wanted to earn some cash last weekend. Yes, I said EARN. My children, who haven't earned an allowance in months because they can't do a couple of simple chores without being pestered, were going to do some hard labor!

I'm as shocked as you.

They grabbed some rakes and began knocking on our neighbor's doors. Mr. P., who lives across the street, was their first taker (which was very sweet as he has a lawn service).

He told the kids that he would pay them $2.00 each to rake the front lawn. They accepted and jumped right in; putting their nose to the grindstone.

After about fifteen minutes, they knocked on Mr. P.'s door.

"Can we quit now?" They asked.

Mr. P. tried not to laugh and said, "What do you mean? You still have a lot to do!"

"But there are soooooo many leaves!"

My neighbor thought for a second and looked around at his yard. "You know, there are more leaves here than I originally thought. Tell you what, I'll give you $5.00 each if you can finish up."

The thought of more money gave the boys the boost they needed to begin again.

Another thirty minutes went by and Mr. P. heard another knock at his door.

"We're done!"

Mr. P. stepped out on his walkway and noticed that the boys had only raked from his front steps forward. They had missed the side of the house to his back fence.

"What about that?" He asked.

"Your front yard is only over here," W. said as he gestured with his finger.

"Sorry guys, that's part of it too."

Knowing that he was right, the boys reluctantly picked up their rakes again. Mr. P., who was getting quite a kick out of the whole situation, once again went into his house.

At about this time, Mr. Schmitty peeked at them from our front window. He caught W. trying to rake the leaves under a bush. He shouted for him to knock it off.

At least the boy was creative.

Knock. Knock.

Mr. P. answered the door again.

"NOW, we are done!" The boys exclaimed.

"Wow! That was fast!"

"V. let us in on the secret!"

"What secret?"

"Use a leaf blower!"

Apparently, V. was feeling badly for the boys and came out to give them a hand. I told you he was a keeper!

Whooooo Are You? Who? Who?

2009-11-05T10:55:00.006-05:00

The young boy jumped out of the tree he was climbing. He walked past the small crowd of people who were huddled under the awning. They were trying to stay dry from the rain as they smoked their cigarettes.

"Hi!" He heard the man say.

"Hi!" He answered back.

"What's your name?"

"It's W."

"Well, how are you, W.?" He smiled at the boy.

"Good."

"Who's your mom?" The man questioned.

"Um....your daughter."

Yup, that my friends, was a scene from my nephew's birthday party a few weeks ago. I did not know that my father was going to be attending.

Actually, no one did.

The invitation was extended, by my brother, after a few failed attempts to visit with my father. My father was NEVER good at keeping promises. So, really, who would have thought that he'd show up for his grandson's first birthday.

SURPRISE!

I haven't seen him in quite a few years. Probably since my daughter was born and he graced us with his presence at the hospital. He stayed his usual eight to ten minutes. And that was that.

When I heard he had called and was on his way, a knot in my stomach tightened. He came in and I saw how old he had gotten. I could see the alcohol had finally caught with him. He's only 67 years old, but the years of self abuse were apparent.

He smiled and spoke in his loud, "Is everyone looking at me" voice. He was still as pompous as ever. I think I rolled my eyes.

My children were all around me and I whispered in each of their ears, "That is your Grandfather Jim." I hated using the word Grandfather. As far as I'm concerned, their Grandfather is, sadly, in heaven. My father-in-law, who loved them dearly, is the only man my children should call Grandpa.

For about an hour, while joined in conversations, of which he was included, he never spoke directly to me or to my children.

I began to fume. I texted back and forth with Mr. Schmitty, who was at work. I told him that the FUCKER couldn't even acknowledge us!

Then I heard the howling laughter from my brother. He proceeded to tell me the story of my son and my father out by the tree. My father had no idea who I was. He did not recognize me. WTF?!!

My dad came inside and was laughing and trying to hug me, which I guess was his way of apologizing for his screw up.

My brother and I shared a laugh later on that night as we recounted the colossal brain fart my father had exhibited. We always could bond over funny, ridiculous dad stories and this one would definitely be going down in the books.

Laughter....I guess it IS the best medicine for a very, VERY sad situation.

PG Should Stand For "PLEASE GETMEOUTTAHERE"!

2009-11-03T07:38:00.005-05:00

My oldest son, W., has gotten hooked on reruns of the television show Malcolm In The Middle. I had never seen the show before and only knew that it was a comedy. The IMDb (Internet Movie Database) lists it's plot as: "A gifted young teen tries to survive with his dimwitted, dysfunctional family".

I really had no idea that there was a sitcom based on our family. I might as well scrap that script. Heh.

Okay, back to my story. So, W. has been using the DVR to record his new favorite show. He watches episodes every chance he gets. He asked me to sit with him a few times and I must say, I do find it pretty funny. But I'm sure you're not surprised, as I do have the sense of humor of a twelve year old boy.

The mom on the show, Lois, is my hero. The way she whips those boys into shape; I find her inspiring. And as I take notes on ways to torment my own offspring, I can see the wheels turning in their heads. They too are mentally recording new ways to torture me as they watch the Wilkerson boys wreak havoc.

It's family fun for all!

Now, this show is rated PG. A few TV appropriate cuss words are randomly thrown out. I think this is one of the appealing factors for my son. At his age, cuss words rule! There is also some sexual innuendo at times. Nothing too risqué, mostly parental kissing and such. Most of it just disgusts my boys, which in turn, adds to my amusement.

Last night we were watching an episode which involved Malcom's nasty, evil grandmother. The family was rushing grandma out the door, on the way to the airport, after an apparently LONG visit. She slipped on a leaf and fell. The old bitty then hired a lawyer so she could sue her own daughter. In the same day, Lois finds out she is pregnant again and screams, "WE CAN'T EVEN AFFORD THE ONES WE HAVE!!"

Lois approaches her mother, convinced her mom will do the right thing, and drop the lawsuit. She tells her she is having another child and that they can barely get by as it is. The grandmother agrees that this new development changes everything.

"You should settle!" She exclaims.

"WHAT?!!" Lois cries.

"It's not my fault you can't keep your legs closed!" She shoots back.

"What does that mean?" W. inquired.

My eyes got big. I was sure that would have gone completely over his head. I looked to Mr. Schmitty. The expression on his face told me that he'd be absolutely no help.

I opened my mouth to say, well, I have no idea what. I kind of just stammered.

"Mom, tell me! What does settle mean?"

I practically fell off my chair laughing!!!

Trick or Treat, Smell My Feet!

2009-10-31T00:01:00.000-04:00

Happy Halloween Everyone!!

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

I Don't Write, I Don't Comment, I Don't Read....Yet, You Still Love Me!

2009-10-21T09:54:00.006-04:00

I have been missing from the Blogosphere lately. I haven't written in over two weeks. I haven't answered emails and I haven't returned comments. I haven't read blogs. Well, except for Cake Wrecks, Craftastrophe, and People of Walmart, 'cause I like looking at the pictures, and they are as funny as hell.

Now, I could lie and say that I've been in the Witness Protection Program after blowing the whistle on these companies for ripping us off.

I could say that I damaged my typing finger on my keyboard trying to hit the, now absent, letter B (thanks kids!). And you might just believe me because I do like to use the words Bitch and Bastard a lot, so the letter B is essential to my existence.

I could say my addiction has gotten the best of me and I had to begin outpatient treatment right after I managed my Cafe and tended to my Farm.

But none of those explanations are the reason I have been scarce around here. The real reason is....my mind has gas. Major, MAJOR gas. I have been having nothing but brain farts and quite honestly, it's not pretty. I can barely form a complete sentence. Life has been flying by at supersonic speed just dealing with the kids and THEIR lives. Because as you know, being a parent, I don't have one of my own.

And maybe it is this missing B button too....it's really pissing me off. May*e I'll stop using it all together.

Anywho.

Even though I have *een missing....you all STILL love me. You do, you really, REALLY do! I've received two awards in my a*sence.

First is from a girl I wish I knew IRL. I wished she lived in my neigh*orhood. I think we might *e really, REALLY great friends. It is the wonderful and *eautiful *aloney from That's *aloney! She has *estowed onto me this *est Blog Award! Thank you!!

Next is Krystal from Tap That Mom. I do *elieve she and I are long lost sisters. We seem to have the same sense of humor and try to laugh at the craziness of raising kids. She has given me the Spreader of Love Award. Thank you sweetie!

Now, to spare you an awfully long post today, I will *e passing on these awards tomorrow. Plus then I actually have something else to write about. Heh.

Thanks again my lovelies!! MUAH!

*insert the letter that comes after A and *efore C at each asterisk.

Disgruntled Consumer

2009-10-05T12:10:00.004-04:00

As my kids are growing, so are their appetites. I have 3 skinny kids and really didn't think they ate a lot. But as the groceries seem to dwindle at a rapid pace, I am now realizing that yes, they ARE little piggies. Either that, or I'm eating in my sleep.

Heh.

If you take a look at my checkbook, other than bill entries, you mostly see: "Wegmans", "Foodtown", "Wegmans", "Wegmans", etc., etc. We are constantly taking trips to the food store.

Quite honestly, it's breaking the bank.

I've been trying different ideas to cut back on the expense. I buy store brand items, whenever possible. Most products from Wegmans are great, some not so much. I try something new every trip to see if it will pass the taste test with my kids. If it does, it makes onto the list, permanently.

I also have been taking their snacks and breaking them down into snack bags. I purchase the store brand, snack sized, ziploc baggies and place one serving size in each. Though time consuming, I have to say, that since doing this, I see that snacks last a LOT longer. The kids no longer sit in front of the tv with a bag of pretzels and polish it off. The mindless eating was spoiling their real meals and costing me a fortune. The snack bag actually fills them; the bag empties and they are done. It's SO worth the effort!

Can I get an Amen?

This morning I took a large box of Goldfish and a bag of Teddy Grahams and looked at the label. I actually counted out each serving and filled as many bags as I could. I then placed them in a plastic basket in the snack cabinet.

That's when I noticed something. According to the Teddy Grahams box I should have had 10 servings. The Goldfish box should have had 32.

They ripped me off! I was a serving short on bears and 4 servings off on Goldfish. Now I understand that some of the food gets crushed in the box. There were a few pieces of the graham crackers in the bottom of the bag and quite a big of the Goldfish. BUT....not THAT much was mashed.

How long have I been gypped? Think about how that adds up over the years.

Shame on you Pepperidge Farms and Nabisco! How about some FREE coupons?

He Waltzed Right Into It

2009-10-01T07:13:00.006-04:00

Mr. Schmitty and I got into bed the other night, exhausted. That's what happens when you stay up too late; one on the computer playing Bejeweled and the other playing war games on Xbox.

Anyway, I rolled over, in the dark, to give him a kiss goodnight. I was met with the most puckered up lips I have ever encountered.

"That was like kissing an asshole!" I snorted hysterically.

"You've kissed an asshole alot?" He chuckled back.

"Everyday of my life, dear, everyday.of.my.life."

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Mr. Schmitty took the chocolate ice cream from the freezer. I then watched him take a large serving spoon from the kitchen drawer. He popped the lid off of the container and scooped out a large mound of ice cream. He proceeded to eat it right off the spoon as he put the container back into the freezer.

"That's all you are going to have?" I asked the ice cream fiend.

"Yup!" He mumbled through his apparent blissful moment.

"I see you keep doing that lately. I can't believe that's all you are having," I said as I watched him enjoy the last of the melting goodness.

"I'm just having enough to curb my craving," he said as he placed the spoon in the sink.

He turned toward me and I lifted my shirt. I flashed my freshly unleashed girls at him.

"There! That should have curbed any cravings you might have!" I exclaimed as I turned and walked away.

September Has Thrown Me Into A Tizzy

2009-09-25T05:42:00.004-04:00

So yea, I'm feeling a bit like a chicken with no head these days. I'm missing the lazy days of summer because since school started, I feel like I'm somewhat out of sync. Our routine is beginning to come together, but we just aren't quite there yet. Actually, I'm not quite there.

I'm feeling a tad overwhelmed.

Three kids in school, one still only half days. Getting up early and starting the day with no one getting out of bed and, "Eat, get dressed, brush your teeth, move it, MOVE IT, MOOOOOVE IT!" Making lunches, paperwork, homework, paperwork, tests, paperwork, projects, and more freaking paperwork!

I'm also watching a classmate of R.'s, two days a week. I'm doing so just for a little extra cash, because honestly, we can use it. VERY sadly, I've closed shop on my business, Doodle Kids®. I couldn't justify the expense any longer. It was the hardest decision to make. I worked SO hard on it for five years. Since the economy has taken a nosedive, my business just wasn't making it. I'm heartbroken. I hope to take a different approach with it in the future, but I'll need to regroup and revamp.

In the meantime, I wish there were a way for me to make some extra cash from home. I know ALL of those work from home opportunities are scams...but sometimes, they just look so tempting. Is anyone out there legitimate anymore? sigh.

I have taken on a school project. I have decided to chair a new program our school is participating in. It's the PTA Reflections contest. It is a national arts competition and I think it's fantastic! If your school doesn't do this, here is a link to their website.

The arts are extremely important to me. I feel they don't get their fair share in our children's education. This program tries to encourage children to express themselves through their art. I was so excited to learn that our elementary school would be involved in this.

As it's our first year, I will be the guinea pig. I'll be finding out how to make it work. What to do and how to do it. It's a big chunk of pie on my plate. I'm thinking, once I get the hang of it, it's going to be so rewarding. This is so up my alley.

But first? I need to weed through it all.....and find that darned head of mine.

Take Us Back In Time Tuesday - 9/22/09

2009-09-22T00:00:00.004-04:00

I have THE most adorable picture for you this week! I was so excited to share it with you, my dear readers. It is one of my most favorite of photos.

I went to my special photo album. I flipped through it's pages, ever so carefully. "Ah-Ha! There it is!" I shouted out loud.

I carefully removed the image from it's protective sleeve, making sure to hold only the edges, so as to avoid smudges and fingerprints.

But then I remembered this article.

So, unfortunately, this is all you're getting.......

Seriously, Walmart? WTF?!
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Well, That Didn't Take Long!

2009-09-20T20:09:00.005-04:00

I received R.'s first phone call home from the teacher. Already. Yup, I knew the day would come, I just didn't expect it to be so soon.

R., though very feisty, can also be quite the scaredy cat. She can be clingy with me when faced with a new situation or with new people. Once she sees that she is safe, she warms up quite quickly. But until the thaw has begun? She wants no part of anything.

A prime example was Kindergarten orientation. She cried. She clung. She refused to go to school. When the children lined up with their new teacher to be taken on a tour, she begged for me to go. I walked along with her to her classroom and stopped at the door. She went right in and that was that. She came back skipping and waving.

She continued going to school every day with a smile on her face. Then on Thursday, R. got the rug pulled out from underneath her tiny body.

The teacher's voicemail explained that a new student had joined their class and R. became extremely upset.

My brow furrowed.

Mrs. C. said that R. was crying and saying that she did not want this new student in their class. She wouldn't eat her snack. "She's quite the stubborn little thing!" The teacher went on to say.

"SEE?! No one believes me!" I thought to myself. That petite, sweet angel. Yea, until you piss her off!

Apparently, the teacher got a load of my darling daughter's willpower. She wouldn't stand to say the Pledge of Allegiance and glared at the teacher when she told her to get up. She didn't want to go to gym class. She didn't want to participate in circle time. She didn't want to budge from her chair.

She was petrified of this new child and how a monkey wrench was thrown into her now comfortable existence in Kindergarten.

When she came home from school we discussed what had happened. She is very perceptive and understood everything that we talked about. The conversation went very well and I was convinced that everything had been smoothed over.

The next morning she awoke happily, bounced down the stairs, and plopped on the couch. I told her she needed to get dressed for school.

"Oh, I'm not going to school today," she answered.

"Um, yes, you are," I replied.

"Will HE be there?"

"Of course."

"Then I'm not going. Someone was absent yesterday. So you can be absent. I am going to be absent today."

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I knew the next hour was going to be a nightmare but I also found it quite amusing that she had figured this all out. I dug my heels in and after a small battle we headed out the door to school.

I had written the teacher a note and told her that I would actually be in the school for about an hour that day for Library duty. If she needed me, I had my cell phone.

I must have checked that cell phone a few dozen times. No calls.

Upon picking her up, R. came out, with a huge grin on her face. I got a thumbs up from Mrs. C. and I stopped holding my breath.

R. pointed to a rather large boy in the line of children. "That's him mommy. He's nice."

I looked over and it became perfectly clear to me WHY R. had been so shaken up. This child was the size of a 2nd grader. He towered over R. and reminded me of a very young Moose from the Archie comics.

Maybe she can hire him as her bodyguard, that way she'll ALWAYS feel safe!

Why Do The Girls Always Get The Crappy End Of The Deal?

2009-09-17T06:17:00.005-04:00

I was helping R. get ready for school the other day. She was tired and not very motivated. I grabbed her clothes and told her I would help her get dressed.

"Why are you getting me dressed?" She asked.

"Well, you seem to need a little help this morning."

She began to wiggle and be less than cooperative as I tried to put her dress over her head.

"C'mon R.! Mommy's getting too old for this!"

She giggled.

"That's funny?" I giggled back. "Will you let me come live with you when I'm really old?"

"Yes, mommy!!"

"You might have to help ME get dressed." I said.

"I will!"

Suddenly I heard T. shout from his bedroom, "Mom, you can come live with me!"

"Awwwww!" I thought to myself. My boy loves his mama!

"Really, T.? I can? You'll take care of me? Make me dinner? Take me to doctor's appointments? Help me find my teeth?"

He laughed and said, "YES!!"

"You'll even change my diaper?"

Silence.

"You know what? You can go live with R."

Take Us Back In Time Tuesday - 9/15/09

2009-09-15T10:55:00.004-04:00

I was 20 years old when I first saw the man I wanted to make babies with. The year was 1987. I was instantly enamored with his chiseled good looks. His voice made me swoon. And when he took off his shirt to reveal that body.

shiver.

This week's Take Us Back In Time Tuesday photo is not my own. But I strongly feel it is appropriate.

Patrick Wayne Swayze
August 18, 1952 - September 14, 2009

This is the man that stole my heart during his performance in the movie Dirty Dancing. "Johnny" was THE sexiest man I had ever laid my eyes on.

I fell even harder when he took up pottery in 1990's Ghost. I cry every time I watch that movie.

Patrick Swayze was my heartthrob and yesterday, he was taken away. My prayers are with his wife and family.

"The love inside, you take it with you"

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In Memory - September 11, 2001

2009-09-11T12:37:00.006-04:00

We have come to the 8th year since that fateful day. That is more years, than two of my children, have celebrated birthdays. And like on the days that they were born, I remember ever minute detail, as though it were yesterday.

I wrote about what I was doing when I heard the news. You can read that post here.

My heart always feels heavy on this day. I feel sorrow for those that were lost and the families that lost them. That day changed many of the ways I look at things. It changed me.

I had a hard time dealing with the aftermath, as many Americans did. I was paranoid. I was scared. I had been trying to conceive my second child and now, I wasn't so sure I wanted to proceed. Did I want to bring another child into this world?

I didn't know what to do with myself. I needed to work through it. As I am a creative person by nature, I began to search for photos on the Internet. I then compiled them into a photo memorial that I set to music.

The first time I watched it in it's entirety, I cried. And cried.

I released my pent up anxiety. And then I got pissed. I wasn't going to let them win. I pulled up my Granny panties and flipped them the finger.

I now watch my video every year on this date. I have saved copies for my children. I would like to share it with you.

(YouTube wouldn't allow me to upload it as one video. I have broken it down into each section. I also want to apologize for the quality.)

Part 1 shows the devastation of that day; the reactions and the mourning. It also shows how the world banded together to offer support.

Part 2 is a memorial of many of the lives lost.

Part 3 is a montage of artwork from children. Through this art and their eyes you can see how September 11 affected them. (Again, I apologize as the music is a bit shaky.)

And finally, Part 4 is a dedication to all of the Police, Firemen, Military, and Medical Personnel that risked their lives to do what they do best.

We Will Never Forget!