myprontopup.com

2008-06-10T04:09:00.000-07:00

Cash Cow

The State Fair will award more than $950,000 in prizes. Uff da. That's a lot of pickles.

Lots of work being done on the fairgrounds this summer. I've been watching the progress of several improvements for months now. In addition to the new International Bazaar, they're also replacing the House of Labor structure. They're also doing some work on the KSTP building (where the tornado exhibit has been for the past couple of years).

Anyway, what are we down to? 71 days? It's a-comin' quickly.

(Bear with me as I try to do "something" to fix my persistent blogger problems. I'm almost ready to abandon my spaghetti code and move to something else...)

2008-06-04T14:37:00.000-07:00

Tonight Minnesota!

Guess what I did last night?

I love St. Paul. The turnout was unbelievable for last night's rally! I went with a friend and we got downtown about 7:00 or so, and then spent about 2 hours wandering through downtown St. Paul. The lines to get into the Xcel Center spanned over a mile and a half. But, we got in, and even managed to grab some spring rolls at Ruam Mit Thai on the way.

I've never seen a line that long in my life -- just unbelievable!

Just one wish: would you pundits out there stop saying that Minnesota is going to be a 'battleground state'? It isn't. 30,000+ people (and I think that's a conservative figure) spending a Tuesday night standing in line just to see Obama? C'mon!

I've never attended a political rally in my life, but this one was fun. Like, really, really fun...

2008-06-03T07:54:00.000-07:00

Maybe we're craaaa-zy

Probably.

Wow! Kudo's to the State Fair for pulling an expected rabbit out of the hat with their final Grandstand announcements.

GNARLS BARKLEY is playing the fair.

THAT'S CRAZY!!!

Oh, the the free stages are now posted as well -- looking good!

2008-05-14T03:59:00.000-07:00

A Minnesota moment

Part of the Strib's coverage of the Minnesota Sesquicentennial on the state fair -- a Minnesota moment.

Did that guy say corn dogs? Really?

2008-05-12T19:03:00.000-07:00

Spam, Spam, Spam, McCain, and Spam

Things younger than John McCain. (Having harvested a nice batch of compost over the weekend, I'd add 'Dirt' to that list as well...)

Ten Foods You’ll Find, Eat, and ~~Regret~~ Enjoy at the State Fair.

State Fair barnstormer (and aviation legend) Chuck Doyle passes away at 91. [The video link has a bit by Gale Frost, the late, great State Fair historian].

He became a favorite of Minnesota State Fair Thrill Shows. Doyle starred in stunts that seem outlandish to modern airmen and women. One of his most famous performances was driving a motorcycle down the dirt track in front of the Grandstand, then climbing a rope ladder up into a biplane passing overhead.

2008-04-21T06:43:00.000-07:00

Bring on da noise, bring on da funk

Okay, so I wasn't exactly thrilled when the Backstreet Boys were added to the Grandstand line-up. But the State Fair line-up on the free stages is already wowing me big time! Maybe you're not familiar with the following acts, but *I* am, and I'm here to tell you this is going to be one funky fair. Check it out!

Starting us out on the opening two nights is Sharon Jones. Think of her as Amy Winehouse without a crack problem, being backed up by James Brown's band.

Sharon Jones & The Dap-Kings (8/21 and 8/22)

Then, we've got the funky 70's-era War. Okay, so it's not the 'original lineup', but who cares? As long as they play Lowrider, Spill The Wine, and The Cisco Kid, I'll be happy to groove along.

WAR (8/27 and 8/28)

And, for the final Friday/Saturday night, we've got Trombone Shorty. Kid is 21 and is amazing (he opened for U2, btw)... Plays a musical gumbo of New Orleans jazz, hip-hop, and rock.

Trombone Shorty & Orleans Avenue (8/29 and 8/30)

And, that's just what's book so far...

Current mood: Giddy.

2008-04-14T16:37:00.000-07:00

Regrese Pronto

That was the last billboard I saw on the way to the airport coming home. Regrese Pronto. Come Again Soon. How appropriate.

Well, vacation's over. Here's some pics of my 4 days in paradise.

In other news, what's this about anyway? Norm Coleman and his brilliant cadre of GOP cronies have come up with a novel idea to kick-off the 2008 Republican Convention -- CivicFest: A Very Minnesota Celebration.

Hmmm? If ONLY we had some sort of festival to celebrate our Minnesotaness in the last days of August... You know, something like a Great Minnesota Get-Together if you will. My, what a splendid idea...

For a mere $15, you can hang out with Norm under a giant 'Mission Accomplished' banner on a simulated aircraft carrier. Or, you can read 'My Pet Goat' in a simulated class room for 7 minutes while the World Trade Center burns.

Or, you can boycott this ridiculous propaganda event, have a pronto pup and a cup of Summit, and attend the only true CivicFest. I'll be hanging out in the Al Franken booth. Join me.

2008-04-11T15:09:00.000-07:00

Day of the Iguana

Big snowstorm back home. Here? About 90 degrees and sunny. heh.

I can't seem to upload any pictures from the resort, so those will have to wait.

Today, I was relaxing by this secluded pool in the middle of a mangrove. I had a cold beer, was lying back under a shady palapa, and listening to some Bob Marley as my mind floated into total relaxation. Then, I felt something wet on my finger which was dangling over the lounger. I sat up, and there was a 2-foot iguana that had just LICKED my finger! Ewww.

I've quickly discovered that iguanas are the Mexican equivalent of squirrels. They are everywhere. After my little finger-licking incident, I watched as a troop of iguanas went after some old ladies. Seriously, there were like 7 or 8 iguanas that were just surrounding them (they had fruity drinks, so I suspect iguanas like fruit)... Or tequila...

Anyway, only 1 full day left, and then I head back to the frozen tundra on Sunday. Sigh.

2008-04-08T14:36:00.000-07:00

Hasta Luego!

It's been a long, crappy winter, so I'm going to reset my mental clock here for the next few days...

It's an (enormous) eco-friendly resort on the Riviera Maya in Mexico. Over a mile of white sand beach. And plenty of cerveza.

I may even post a few pictures or update during my stay (internet permitting), so stay tuned...

Current mood: anxious.

2008-04-01T05:10:00.000-07:00

I ~~don't~~ Want It That Way

Just announced!...

The Backstreet Boys are going to be playing at the state fair.

(This is not, sadly, an April Fool's Day joke.)

Also, Brad Paisley and Toby Keith.

2008-03-31T17:05:00.000-07:00

April Fair Day

The first day of April. And we just got walloped with ANOTHER 6" of snow. And I'm sick of it. So, I'm taking back this silly holiday and re-claiming April 1st as... April Fair Day!

The one-minute State Fair.

View all of the 2007 Minnesota State Fair TV commercials here.

And another slightly longer version...

The worst State Fair movie ever. Favorite quote, "Two jews going to the swine bar. There ain't nothing kosher about that..."

A ride on the SkyRide!

Okay, now let's ride the Roller Coaster!

Still haven't tossed your Sweet Martha's cookies? Okay, let's try the Slingshot (some exuberant NSFW language)...

Now when was the last time you laughed like that?

Oh, wait. Nevermind.

2008-03-25T06:25:00.000-07:00

Yes, but can he moonwalk?

More entertaining than Dancing with the Stars, that's for sure...

2008-03-23T14:54:00.000-07:00

First Day of Spring

Guess I shouldn't have been so cavalier with my jug of ice melting pellets.

We got another 6" of snow over the weekend... Bah.

Of course, in a mere 2 1/2 weeks I'll be sitting on a beach drinking margaritas, so what do I care?

Leave a disposable camera on a park bench for strangers to use, and see what happens. Actually, this would be an awesome idea for the state fair.

Manterns -- candles for men.

If celebrities moved to Oklahoma.

2008-03-06T13:35:00.000-08:00

Weapon of Choice

"Those people who want to use a camera should have something in mind, there's something they want to show, something they want to say... I picked up a camera because it was my choice of weapons against what I hated most about the universe: racism, intolerance, poverty.... but I chose not to go that way. I felt that I could somehow subdue these evils by doing something beautiful that people recognize me by, and thus make a whole different life for myself, which has proved to be so."

Well, it's about TIME! Finally Gordon Parks is getting some respect in St. Paul, by having a high school named after him. And, just a couple miles from my house.

I've seen Half Past Autumn many times, and during one of the last viewings I had to ask a friend, "Why isn't he more of a hero?" He came from nowhere (a homeless kid on the streets of St. Paul) with absolutely nothing and somehow managed to become a writer, director, musician, composer, and most importantly, a brilliant photographer.

Seriously, you couldn't pick a more inspirational figure to have his name on a school for kids at risk.

In other news...

Werner Herzog in conversation with Errol Morris. Some interesting things. They actually (almost) went to dig up Ed Gein's mother's grave. Weird. I just saw Stroszek a couple of weeks back. Excellent movie, if you're into depressing existential German cinema. Like me.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Why, it's David Sedaris delivering a pizza...

Ouch! Someone's hatin' on Diablo Cody's next script for Jennifer's Body. Interesting analysis of the screenplay, though. Honest to blog!

2008-02-27T14:35:00.000-08:00

Changing my Latitude

I finally booked my trip for April. A couple of weeks ago I was stuck in the winter doldrums and (for some reason) I kept thinking about this old Chanel No. 5 ad. Remember this?

I am made of blue sky and golden light, and I will feel this way forever.

Share the Fantasy.

What was really interesting is that I discovered that the commercial was directed by Ridley Scott and the music was by Vangelis.

Now it made sense. This is the same director/composer combo behind Blade Runner. Which is really eerie because like the night before I discovered this, I watched the new Final Cut with a couple of friends. No wonder it made such an imprint on my memory.

So that's just some trivia about my frame of mind -- and (somehow) how I needed to read this as a sign and go be blue sky and golden light.

In just about 6 weeks, I'll be sitting right here (seriously, this EXACT spot)... in the Riviera Maya in Mexico.

Share the Fantasy...

2008-02-19T12:49:00.000-08:00

Arts and Letters

Some brutally honest letters to God... from kids.

Dear- God- if- we- come- back- as- something- please- don't- let- me- be- Jennifer- Horton- because- I- hate- her.

Denise

John Cleese's letter to america:

Dear Citizens of America,

In view of your failure to elect a competent President and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately.

Oh, this is wonderful -- 41 hilarious science fair experiments. Reminds me of walking through the 4-H building at fair time.

Beat boxing basset. Must train Maddy to do this...

Or maybe I'll just do it myself.

Well, even though we've topped out at a balmy 7 degrees outside (and tomorrow should hit a high of 2), I'm in a pretty good mood. I finally snapped and decided I need some sunshine and a warm sandy beach. I'll let you know where I'm going once I get my travel set...

2008-02-14T12:32:00.000-08:00

Valentine's Day Massacre

While you were getting roses and chocolates today, I spent the better portion of it hiding from chainsaw-wielding men.

Sign. Revoke my tree-hugger card. I just had a big maple tree cut down and removed. Here's the before and after pics...

Basically, it was a perfectly healthy tree. Too healthy in fact. It's roots had already managed to wreak havoc with my neighbor's sewer connection, and given last year's massive storms, I just had to have it removed. It was already maybe 50-60 feet tall (and only a few feet from both my house and my neighbor's), and... it was still a young tree. Left unchecked, this thing would have grown to be massively bigger.

So, with great sadness, it is now gone. Happy Valentine's Day.

In happier news (I hope), I changed the web hosting for the site, so I should now have unlimited storage. Yay!

2008-02-12T15:46:00.001-08:00

test

2008-02-05T12:29:00.000-08:00

Hula Happy

Is it wrong of me to want one of these? Like really bad?

It would almost be like sitting on Elvis' lap. All day long...

2008-01-31T13:31:00.000-08:00

Sustainable Fairing

According to Carnivalwarehouse.com, North America's TOP 50 FAIRS drew over 41,000,000 visitors in 2007.

The article claims that the Minnesota State Fair is the 3rd largest in the country, after the Big Tex (Texas State Fair) and Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo. However, let's look at the numbers (complete list here):

Big Tex
2007 Attendance: 2,052,000
Duration of fair: 24 days
Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo
2007 Attendance: 1,806,129
Duration of fair: 20 days
Minnesota State Fair
2007 Attendance: 1,681,678
Duration of fair: 12 days
Los Angeles County Fair
2007 Attendance: 1,365,026
Duration of fair: 24 days
San Diego County Fair
2007 Attendance: 1,265,997
Duration of fair: 27 days

Notice anything interesting about the durations of those fairs? If we adjust the rankings to reflect the average daily attendance, Minnesota is the biggest by a longshot!

Minnesota State Fair
2007 Average Daily Attendance: 140,140
Houston Livestock Show & Rodeo
2007 Average Daily Attendance: 90,306
Big Tex
2007 Average Daily Attendance: 85,500
Los Angeles County Fair
2007 Average Daily Attendance: 56,876
San Diego County Fair
2007 Average Daily Attendance: 46,889

Also, the Minnesota State Fairgrounds is encompasses 320 acres. Big Tex? Only 277 acres.

So, I still maintain that we are the biggest State Fair in the country, all things considered. Not EVERYTHING is bigger in Texas...

In other news, the Minnesota State Fair board just approved $9 Million in maintenance and improvements for 2008. It's important to note: All projects are funded through State Fair operating income and grants from the Minnesota State Fair Foundation. The fair is financially self-sufficient and receives no government aid of any kind. As in, "none of your tax dollars"...

So, that's the straight dope. Only 202 days to go...

2008-01-28T05:10:00.000-08:00

BREAKING NEWS!!!!

If you're already bored with the Winter Carnival Medallion hunt (as I am), an even BIGGER treasure has just been found. Roving correspondents Chad and Nicole discovered 4 new Pronto Pup stands:

While driving through Lakefield Minnesota today, we saw the most unusual sight. Between a bait shop and an insurance office were 4, brand new, pronto pup stands. I attached pictures of what I got with my camera phone.

They looked like they just came off the factory floor. Shiny, new and never been touched by grease. We began speculating if these were destined to be at the Minnesota State Fair.

We asked around and the rumor is these are in fact for the fair andare totally stainless steel inside to meet new health regulations. We still do not know why they are in being stored in an empty parking lot in Lakefield.

Developing...

2008-01-21T05:22:00.000-08:00

Crime Scene On A Stick

CSI: State Fair???

The Library of Congress has released a bunch of photos on Flickr. I did a search for state fair and found a few, though nothing from Minnesota yet.

Strange children's book: Mommy, where is there a server in the house?

2008-01-20T10:06:00.001-08:00

The Mop Accident

Man, what an idiot I am! I added a new scar to my hand this morning. In a mopping accident of all things. A mopping accident!

I have one of those new-fangled pump-action mops, where you pull the base of the handle "up" to wring out the mop, kind of like a pump-action rifle. So, about to do one last pass on the kitchen floor, I'm about to wring it out, and it's kind of stuck so I just pull harder. It breaks loose and WHAM! It flies up and slams against the plastic stopper also on the handle in a torrential rage. And it's then I realize: Where's my finger?

In between, that's where!

Arrrgh. I hate the site of blood, and within seconds it starts oozing. Nothing deep, but a nice little sliver of skin has been removed. So I run to the bathroom and pour some peroxide over it (and curse like a sailor, obviously) and wrap it up neatly with a band-aid. Hurts like hell. I mean, if I get a scar from this, I sure as hell wish I could say I was gutting a wild boar or fixing the axle of a 4x4. But a mopping accident? Man, that's emasculating.

I survive this little ordeal, and I give up on any further mopping. I curl up in a comfy chair instead and read my latest issue of the Atlantic Monthly and watch The Mighty Ducks on TV. By midmorning it's all fine for the most part. The band-aid is completely soaked through, but the bleeding has stopped. And it's Sunday, I have nothing to do, so a new thought strikes me. I should make a big batch of Chili, so I can have that when I'm watching football this afternoon. Brilliant!

I'll skip the details of everything that ensued while I prepped the chili, but let me state unequivocally: If you have a big open gash on your finger, do NOT grab a handful of minced jalapeno peppers, onions, and garlic with your bare hand, band-aid or no. And, in that instant of mind-numbing pain, don't flail you're arm so wildly so that you scatter peppers across your oh-so-recently mopped floor!

I cannot even begin to tell you what that feels like. Nor can I tell you why "Oh, hoochie-mama!" was the the only invective that came to mind at that particular time.

And then, I had to clean it AGAIN with peroxide ("Hoochie-mama!"), and put a new band-aid on it, which has now once again soaked through. And my floor needs to be cleaned again. And I feel spent.

I can't believe I'm saying this, but I sure wish it was Monday already. This damn chili better be good.

Go Packers!

2008-01-15T15:31:00.001-08:00

Daily affirmation

In the future, the fairs must be increasingly instructive, inspirational, and entertaining. My own emphasis would be on the last two words, for the things that inspire and entertain inevitably educate. Moreover, our emotions, no less than our minds, need cultivation. We crave more play and amusement than we take or give.

A modern state fair is a celebration, a festival, a vacation, a recreation, its essential spirit is entirely foreign to the morbidly serious purpose which our toiling forefathers had in view when they brought fairs into existence. We have outgrown many of the restraints and dogmas that may have been useful in earlier days. We demand more freedom, more joy, more life, than our ancestors dared even to seek. Our attitude toward life is not their attitude; it is less austere, less afraid, less serious. We believe as firmly productive, honest work; but we demand a longer and higher reach of the subtle incentive to thought and action, a nobler excuse for our living. It is impossible for us to be satisfied with their program, excellent though it was for its day. We are compelled, by the dynamic force that surges through us, to utilize our own personal resources, our individual powers, in building and reshaping the present.

The Mission of State Fairs

The Annual Report of the Minnesota State Agricultural Society

A celebration, a festival, a vacation, a recreation -- how true to my heart!

I've been trying to stave off the winter blues by reading the latest two volumes in my ever-growing State Fair book collection. I picked up the 1913 and 1914 annual reports of the Minnesota State Fair on eBay, and it's got a ridiculous amount of information in them. They were required by law to publish these annual reports and submit them to the governor each year. It details EVERYTHING -- the ticket receipts, premiums paid, checks written, apple pie winners, etc.

Most of it is kind of boring, but there's some interesting nuggets of speeches, such as the one quoted above. Both volumes were compiled by the fair's secretary, J. C. Simpson. If I'm not mistaken, the street that I live on (Simpson Street, duh) was named for him. When these reports were written, there was nothing but farm fields in my neighborhood, and then in the 20's the houses were built.

Each of the fair departments had to submit separate reports, and some of them are quite amusing, such as this one from E.B. Palmer, Supt. of Sanitation.

It strikes me that the method of paper picking by means of a nail in a stick, as has been done for some years past, is a howling farce. It is a great success in wasting time, but aside from that it does not amount to much, except where it is necessary to pick up watermelon rinds or something filthy...

He switched to using rakes to scoop up the trash. Howling farce, begone!

...As to toilet supplies, I was well satisfied with the use of liquid soap both from the standpoint of economy and convenience. Of the two barrels ordered, only one was used and the other returned. The supply of free paper towels, however, is an outrageous extravagance. If I should be in charge of this department again, I should want to do away with the free supply of towels. I would substitute instead, an envelope or a package with three or four paper towels and sell it at five cents or less. Indeed, it might be still better to include in the paper towel package, a very small cake of soap, one sufficient only for one good washing. This would cost very little and avoid the necessity of furnishing even liquid soap.

So, shut yer gob youse that complain that it costs too much to go to the fair. At least they don't charge you wash your hands anymore.

That's what I've been doing. It's going to be cold, cold, cold here for the next week or so. At least I've got some fair reading to keep me occupied.

2008-01-03T12:48:00.000-08:00

Auld Lang Syne

Happy Introvert Day! I celebrated by avoiding the likes of you...

Well, after a very busy holiday season, I've been settling down and making my list of new year's resolutions. So far, I've got a list that's pretty much empty, which is a little depressing especially since I spent all of New Year's Eve watching the Up Series in its entirety (at least through 42 up).

The Up series consists of seven documentary films that have followed the lives of fourteen British children since 1964, when they were seven years old. The children were selected to represent the range of socio-economic backgrounds in Britain at that time, with the explicit assumption that each child's social class predetermines their future. Every seven years, the director, Michael Apted, films new material from as many of the fourteen he can get to participate.

I actually just stumbled across this at the library, but it was a timely series to watch at the start of the new year. I found myself asking the same types of questions they asked the kids, "Where do you think you'll be in 7 years?"

Me? Not a clue. 7 years ago I would've had an answer, I think. Today, I'm baffled. I still have no idea what I want to be when I grow up. But, I think I need to give it more thought, because if the series showed anything, it's that non-dreamers get non-dreamt-of lives.

So, while I try to figure THAT out, here's some other stuff on my to-do (or have-done) list:

** Read Michael Pollan's new book, In Defense of Food, which he summarizes thusly: Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants.

I just joined a coop, so one minor goal for the next year to go local/organic for as much of my food as I can. And to eliminate processed foods as much as possible (*though all of this will be exempt during the fair).

** Don't make fun of other people. Okay, that's not going to work. Like I'm NOT going to find this funny. Who am I kidding?

** Watch more classic movies. Well, with this ongoing writer's strike out in Hollywood, this should be a lot easier. I just finished the classic 1932 carny film Freaks about a week ago. Wow! Amazing film. I guess I was expecting a B-movie type of exploitation movie, but it was just the opposite. Highly recommend it.

** Update this blog more. For some reason that escapes me at the moment.

That's the list right now. I'm sure I'll think of something more, especially that whole 'big picture' thing... Man, what am I going to be doing 7 years from now? Need to figure that one out, pronto.