Engaging Life ... Thoughts on Life

Freedom

2009-07-13T11:40:00.000-07:00

Where do we find freedom that is truly free? We talk about American freedom, freedom out on the open road (for you motorcyclists out there), freedom of speech (and the rest of the Bill of Rights), and more. But even these freedoms have limitations. For example, the freedom of the open road is limited by curves in the road, loose stones on the road, and the yellow and white lines on the road. Freedom of speech is limited, in that, we cannot slander someone else, we can't tell lies under oath, and what we say can be used against us in a court of law.

Ahhh, the law, the thing that both protects us and limits our freedom in a way. So, the law is good but it cannot ultimately give us freedom. In the New Testament, Paul wrote in Romans about this very fact. Freedom for us comes not from knowing the law of what is right and wrong, but instead in knowing Christ who set us free from the law, from sin, and from eternal death.

This is pretty basic stuff for Christ followers, but sometimes we forget. We get focused on how good of a person we are, trying to be the better person, trying to do things right, or trying to be right. Instead we must remember that we need to be made right and good by God. This is the only real way to be free.

A Friend Worth Keeping

2009-06-23T10:55:00.000-07:00

When is the last time you read the Old Testament Book of Job. It is really a great story to read. One of the things that fascinates me about the book is that Job was a man whose life was moved from wealth, influence, having a good name, and a man of deep faith to losing it all. He got there NOT because of sin or messing up in his life, but rather because bad things happened to a good person. And essentially because the devil wanted to make Job's life so miserable that he would curse God.

The good news is that Job did not sink to cursing God even though if I were Job, I do not know if I could have made it. Still, Job became increasingly frustrated and asked God for answers about his situation. Why? Because of Job's friends. They came and accused Job of some wrong doing saying that this was the cause of his suffering.

Read the story for a much better overview. But my thinking moved to the tragic fact that of all the things Job had in life, he lacked a friend worth keeping. Job's suffering brought that to light. In essence, his so-called friends were only superficial friends who were waiting for a moment to pounce on Job and bring him down. When Job suffered all they could do was accuse him.

I hope you have some friends who are worth keeping. These are friends who will stick with you when things are going tough in life. These people are not anxious when you talk to them about your troubles. Rather these are friends who will listen to you without judging you. I hope you have friends like these and I hope you become a friend to others in this way.

Peace

Becoming a Super-Hero Like Peter Parker (Spiderman)

2009-06-01T11:12:00.000-07:00

This week we celebrated The Day of Pentecost in the life of the Church. It was a great celebration as it should be. Pentecost marks the day that God sent God's Spirit to Christians. This gave life to the Christian Church (by the way, the church is the people of God). Miraculous things happened as people heard a message of grace, truth, and hope on that day. Many new people followed Jesus. Many people began to live differently by choosing simplicity, generosity, and community. They found the love of God to be real and transforming in their lives. Hungry people were fed, no one in their community was poor anymore, and everyone had all they needed because they began to share with each other. You can read about this in the book of Acts in the Bible.

In celebrating Pentecost this year I was reminded that these men and women, many of whom became legends and heroes to the church for many years to come, were in fact ordinary people like you and me. Sometimes as a pastor, I am given reverence by a title, such as, "Reverend" (by the way, I dislike the title except when it is used by my friends who know me well and who I know are not using it to "reverence" me). Sometimes to some I am almost considered a hero. But wait, like every one at Pentecost and like every hero you can think of, I along with everyone else is nothing more than an ordinary human being who at times accomplishes something extra-ordinary. How does that happen?

Superheroes like spiderman may give us the clue. It was a spider bite from a radio-active spider (sorry I am not a spiderman expert) that empowered the ordinary Peter Parker to do extraordinary and heroic things. That is what Pentecost is like. It was the Spirit of God that filled the ordinary men like Peter the disciple of Jesus and cause him to lead extraordinary things to happen.

I hope that all of us can experience the bite of God's Spirit in our lives to find the hero within. You may be ordinary, but God has extraordinary and heroic things planned for you. You too can be a super-hero.

Peace

Fear No Evil!

2009-05-20T12:26:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking about Fear. What causes you to be afraid? Are you afraid of the dark, afraid of heights, afraid of getting some disease (or afraid that a loved one will get some disease), dying, or something else? Every one of our fears has the potential of becoming reality to one degree or another. ... Uh, did that put your mind at ease? Probably not. But it is true, bad things can happen to any one of us - and really it matters not how religious you are or how good you are. Bad things can still happen to you.

But no matter what you are afraid of, you do not have to fear evil. Evil is not all the "bad" things outside of us that can harm us (you know, like hurricanes, diseases, or that which we can't control or understand). Rather evil is that which separates us from the good - from God. Evil is found within our hearts when we talk bad about other people. Evil is found within us when we choose not to act in loving ways toward others. Evil is found within our hearts - the most deceitful place in all the world, and yet the place from which the potential for the most good flows. The question is this: Who or what is controlling your heart?

Jesus said, it is not what goes into a person that corrupts him or her, but rather it is that which flows from the inside out that corrupts and destroys us. Check yourself (Yes, for a moment check yourself instead of everyone else around you), and ask what is flowing from within my life: good or evil? Then decide to stay closely connected to Jesus Christ who has the power and potential to change your life.

So instead of fearing evil, realize where it comes from and stop it. And let go of the fear that bad things might happen. Some will and some will not happen to you. And usually that which we worry the most about never comes true anyway, while it is the unexpected that hits us hardest.

These are just my thoughts for the day. I always appreciate dialogue. And if you think differently than me that is good. I would love to hear from you.

Have a peace filled day.

Got a Problem with Someone? Go to the Source!

2009-05-15T07:36:00.000-07:00

Too often people will come to me with a concern about someone else, or they will come having felt offended by someone else. My advice is that they should go and talk to the other person and work out their differences. Too often these persons tell me that they cannot go back to the person with whom they have this problem. Most of the time the reason given for not wanting to talk to the other is the belief that the other person does not or will not listen to or understand them.

But here is what I fail to understand. How does it help anyone to come to me with the problem? At best they get to get something off their chest and at worst this turns into gossip and a deeper separation of people. If I commiserate with them about the other person, it becomes gossip and a deeply judgmental conversation very quickly. If coming to me about the other person is just a time to vent, that can help, but still it fails to move anyone toward reconciliation.

When you are frustrated with someone, feeling hurt, or angry with someone else, it can be helpful to talk to a third person about it in order to seek advice. The advice should be about things like your perceptions of the grievance felt or the best way to approach the other person in a loving and forgiving way. It is also acceptable to ask a third person to be a mediator.

However, if you have no intention of going to the person you are frustrated with, or if it is your intention to have a third person go and speak to the other on your behalf, I encourage you to save your breath and the time of the third person.

It is time we started talking to each other when we feel hurt, frustrated, or angry with someone else. This is the best model for community and for relationships, and it is the best way to approach reconciliation.

Vacation

2009-05-05T13:03:00.000-07:00

I just came back from the remarkable Outer Banks, North Carolina. My wife and I spent a week there with 4 other couples in a house in Rodanthe. (No it was not the same house as in the movie, Nights of Rodanthe). But it was a great place. From our house we could see the ocean and the Bay. It was absolutely beautiful every morning and every night.

I spent my time laying on the beach and by the pool (and I sunburnt). I played two rounds of golf (you do not want to know the score because it was bad). I read and spent time in peace in quiet (basically accomplishing nothing). Really i did nothing of great substance, although Michell (my wife) did go deep sea fishing and caught some fish.

In all one might say, "so, your vacation consisted of a sunburn, two poorly played rounds of golf, and lazing around doing little. What a waste of time. Yes, it was. For me it was a "Royal Waste of Time." By the way, I owe the phrase, "Royal Waste of Time" to author and theologian, Marva Dawn. In her book, she helps us to see the importance of rest and time away with God.

Let me tell you. I came home with the glow of God sunburnt all over my chest and head. I came home having played two marvelous rounds of golf where I had nothing to be stressed about and had only to enjoy the day the Lord had made. I came home having refreshed through putting my feet up, listening to music, and reading the History Books of the Old Testament. Wasting all that time was the best use of my time I can say I had in a long time.

One of my parishoners emailed me on Monday, two days after returning from vacation. She said she hopes that I go away more often. The reason ... in her estimation worship and the preaching event were fresher than they have been in a while. She reminds me of the importance of Royally wasting my time in the presence of God and with good friends. My spirit is refreshed.

And I am glad. Yesterday ended up being a 13 hour day in the office. Many people came to me in need. But the good news is that God prepared me for it.

I hope you can soon waste some of your time away getting refreshed by the living God.

Road Rage - A Sign of Something Deeper

2009-04-03T12:48:00.000-07:00

This week has been a particularly stressful one for me. My blood pressure went up. I have had more headaches. And there are other signs that I am allowing the stress to get the better of me.

First there is the fact that I have been much more aggressive behind the wheel. Normally i drive at or right around the speed limit, I do not move in and out of traffic, and I tend not to yell at other drivers. I noticed this week that I have been speeding, aggressive and yelling at other drivers. I felt stupid.

Then I raised my voice with someone this week who came into my office unannounced. Usually I am pretty calm with those who do this, but this time I was not. I felt remorse about doing it.

But these two things are only surface problems and sins pointing to a deeper issue in my life. The deeper issue is that I am letting my surroundings and circumstances control my life instead of being controlled by the Spirit of God.

At the end of the week I am taking another look at my relationship with God.

I encourage you to be aware of the signs in your life that are uncovering a drift from relying on God.

Peace

Fearing The Things That We Don't Understand

2009-03-27T08:45:00.000-07:00

Too often we fear the things we do not understand. We fear people who are different than us. We fear unfamiliar things.

When this fear fills us we either freeze in life and do nothing (doing nothing is actually doing something), or we try to run away from feared thing. But running away often leads us into trouble too.

Consider a deer who steps out in front of a car. When this happens the deer often freezes not knowing what to do as it stares into the car's headlights. The deer likely got there in the first place because when the deer first heard or saw the car it panicked and ran out into the road. This ends up bad for the deer and the car and usually for the passengers in the car.

I don't know if my illustration is the best one, but the point is unmistakeable for me. When we are faced with something - anything - that is prone to lead us into fear (like a car coming down the road), giving way to the fear can cause bad things to happen.

Instead of being fearful, perhaps it is better to seek understanding. If the deer - incapable as it may be - began to understand that the vehicle approaching will stay on the road it would not likely run into the danger zone of being hit by that car.

If you and I approached people who are different than us by seeking to understand their perspective rather than by fearing them and seeking to run from them, we might grow as people and end up with less pain or no pain.

I know this whole thing is a little vague .... but consider finding someone or something that you do not understand and engage with that person or that thing. Try to see the other not as a threat to you but as something or someone who can help you to grow. Maybe the world would be a better place if we did that.

It seems to me Jesus did that a lot ... people like Zaccaheus, Matthew, prostitutes, lepers, the woman at the well ... need I go on. All of these people were feared and avoided in society by most until Jesus came along. Jesus engaged with these misunderstood and feared people and it made the world better.

Think about it.

I Could Do Better Than That ... Or Not.

2009-03-16T11:21:00.000-07:00

This past Saturday I had breakfast with a friend. We began talking politics, economy, Bernie Madoff, and more. Out of these conversations we began talking about being president. And we found some things to be critical about for both the most recent former presidents (Mr. Clinton and Mr. Bush) and for our current president (Mr. Obama).

It is easy to be critical, isn't it? By the end of the conversation which included lots of critical comments, we both looked at one another and said, "I wouldn't want the job." After all the job is thankless too often, it requires meetings all over the world and at all days and hours, and there is likely less in your control as a president - even in the U.S. - than we would like to think. Yet somehow for a moment in time I was talking as if I could have done better than these leaders have done. It was a humbling moment for me. I realized that, in fact, I could not do better than any of these have done. In fact, if I were president things would probably be worse.

I was thinking that perhaps instead of being critical I could find ways to be supportive of the president, even when I disagree with policy. After all, he is the president and that should be enough to warrant my support, regardless of whether I voted for him.

Perhaps it is time for all of us - me included - to move beyond our belief that somehow we could do better than our leaders, and begin instead to support them. Maybe, just maybe, our leaders would do better at what they do if they received our support instead of our criticism. Sharing ideas even though they may be different than our leaders is good as this may also help them. But criticizing them just because they differ with us and refusing them our support does little but perhaps make things worse than they are.

As a church leader I know how much help I find in ideas shared from people who think differently than I do. Yet it is the critical comments that shut things down. Are you negative or positive in the feedback you give to your leaders?

Think on these things.

If Only Everyone Agreed With Me ...

2009-03-10T10:20:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking a lot lately about being "right." Most of the time I think I am right about how to do things, about my understanding of God, about my political leanings, about relationships, and about most everything. Yes! I AM right about most everything. Sure there are those things that I am wrong about once in a while ... but for the most part, I AM right. If only everyone agreed with me about the things of life.

If only ... reality check! Thank God that not everyone agrees with me about everything. In fact, I know I am not right about everything or even most everything. And if everyone agreed with me on everything the world would be in a huge mess more than anyone could imagine.

I really do not want everyone to agree with me on everything. I want people to challenge me like one of my professors did in college because that helps me to grow as a person. I remember the lesson well. I was taking a class on the Bible book of Revelation ... which at the time, I pretty much believed (In fact, was convinced), that I knew everything about Revelation and that I could teach it without any problems. Throughout the class I found myself correcting my professor about his misunderstandings of Revelation. Thankfully he opened my eyes ... not to the truth of the book of Revelation. Rather he opened my eyes to the truth about myself, that is, I don't know all that I think I do - and more - I AM NOT RIGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING. He gave a wide open assignment for our final paper to write about what we learned about Revelation. I wrote on everything that I unlearned about the book. 17 years later I still know a lot less than I knew back then about Revelation ... But somehow I think that means I actually know more.

I thank God for opening my eyes to the fact that I am not right about everything and I do not have to prove to others that I am right. More I do not have to convince others to agree with me. It is so freeing to live life this way. Maybe instead of convincing others, I should instead do what Jesus did and simply love others without passing judgment. Maybe I should love people even when they fail to agree with me.

That is my ramble for the day. And don't feel like you have to agree.
Peace.

Got Time?

2009-01-07T08:59:00.000-08:00

It is a new year. What will I do with the 525, 6oo minutes of my life this year? What priorities will I give to those minutes? Will I enjoy those minutes, or will I be anxious for them to be over? Will I look back in the future and wonder where they all went? Will I use the time to do things that last longer than those minutes, or will I waste them in things that mean little or nothing to even the minutes spent? Will I use any just to rest and renew? What will I do with all this time?

I hope you take some of your minutes to ask yourself these kinds of questions. It will be worth the time to ask and answer these.

Make the most of the time you have. It will be worth it. (By the way, making the most of your time sometimes involves slowing down, resting, renewing, etc.)

Happy New Year to all.

Who is Responsible for You?

2008-12-31T09:16:00.000-08:00

In the past few years I have been learning something about responsibility. I used to find it easy to blame others when I felt they made me mad or frustrated about some thing. Not so much any more.

Lately I have been learning something about myself ... perhaps about all people. That is, we all can be pushed over the edge on some subject. For example, I know some people who are absolutely aghast at how some could have voted for one presidential candidate or another. Some people can hardly believe that you could vote for a republican like McCain because of his view on war, while others can hardly believe that you could vote for Obama because of his stance on abortion. If one or the others hears about how you voted, it may push them over the edge. They may actually not like you very much anymore because you voted for the "wrong" candidate ... at least in their mind. But they still hold you responsible for blowing it and voting the "wrong" way.

But here is my point ... if you are frustrated at your one time friend for how they voted, then get over it. Yes, they pushed your button that led you to be frustrated with them, but that is not their problem. That is your problem. They are not responsible to you or for your peace of mind about the vote or anything else. You are responsible. We are all responsible for our own buttons and triggers. No one can take you where you do not decide to go. You are responsible for you.

Let me take it one step further. In a marriage, one partner is not responsible for the other's happiness. For someone to say my spouse no longer brings me happiness is foolish. My happiness depends on no one but me. For happiness is a state of mind and only you can control your mind.

So be responsible for yourself. Stop letting others push your buttons. And Don't Worry ... Be Happy!

Just Hanging Out ... It Can Accomplish Much

2008-11-10T13:36:00.000-08:00

I feel sometimes that there has to be a goal accomplished, or that I have to be involved in some thing in order to be considered succesful. It seems that our culture puts pressure on us to accomplish something. But is there not merit in just being together with someone else...talking, laughing, and listening to each other? No goal or purpose, just hanging out. Somehow I think we need more of that in our world. Perhaps such time with others would propel us to accomplish more in life.

My suggestion to you is to find someone today, and just hang out with them. Maybe that is your son or daughter, your husband or wife, a friend, a neighbor, a co-worker, a stranger...you get the idea. At the end of the day you may have just accomplished more than if you had planned out an agenda with several goals in mind. Think about it!

Now I am off to hang out with someone.