The Fearless Travel Writing Knitter

2009-07-09T06:32:00.000-07:00

Tipping Point

Last night we appear to have hit a milestone with the landscaping. Hitherto, any work that we put into the lawn and house exterior (time, $) has helped the appearance only slightly. As in, that new bed with the row of arborvitae looks infinitely better than the old row of cedars we cut down, but the rest of the yard still looks like crap. Or, that new Marvin window is much better suited than the rotting bay window, but that bed of river rock on exposed clear plastic under the window is still butt-ugly. But last night all that changed.

End of season nursery sales were the inspiration for the day. The week previous I finally finished pulling the plastic out from under the rocks, and re-edging the border (that bed of rocks has been put down so long ago that the lawn was encroaching about a foot into the rock bed, and so much soil had built up everywhere else that the plastic was laughingly useless as a weed barrier anyway.)

Two nurseries, $250 dollars later, and enough late afternoon sun intake to cause us now be suffering from the effects of heat exhaustion, the front bed looks beautiful. And the best part is that it no longer is followed with a “but,” as in “the front bed looks beautiful but the entry sucks.” And the entry does suck. But somehow the overall beauty of the landscaping disguises the butt-ugliness of the entry.

Nice.

2009-07-07T12:13:00.000-07:00

A Home Depot Hate-Fest

Home Depot seems to have an infinite capacity to irritate me. Their customer service sucks so much at all levels (corporate on down) that - in my opinion - you better hope what you want is already in stock and on the floor and that nothing requires ordering.

Like last year, when we closed on our house and had only semi-working garage door openers that were quite frankly dangerous. Given that, I asked the salesman over and over how soon they would schedule installation, and his best answer was “we’ve never had any complaints.” A week later without a phone call to even set an appointment, you better believe I was complaining! I ended up cancelling that order and switching to Sears. Wish I’d gone there in the first place.

Most recently I went to the local brick & mortar looking for shade cloth, which I recalled they had carried the year before. The clerk informed us that their Atlanta office had not sent a supply for the 2009 year, but that we could order several shades online. So I did that. July 1. According to their web site, the shade cloth was in stock, and would ship in 2-3 business days.

Fast forward to July 7 (yes, that is nearly a week later). Not only has it not shipped yet, but I received an email stating that my order was cancelled. It gave no explanation. It offered up no alternatives.

I called their online customer service, and was informed that the product was no longer in stock. (Interesting, because I’m checking the web site, and it still shows that the product is in stock.) I offered a few kind customer service suggestions, then the clerk placed me on hold to verify that a similar product in a different shade would be in stock that I could order instead. I waited on hold for nearly 10 minutes. Then I gave up and hung up. Because even if the answer were “yes,” I have lost complete and total faith in that company. In the immortal words of my former neighbor as he was setting fire to his girlfriend’s car, “Eff you and the horse you rode in on, <bleep>!”

We now return to our regularly scheduled programming of Michael Jackson: Fans in Mourning.

2009-07-07T03:49:00.000-07:00

Rounding Third Base and Heading for Home

At last night’s measure, I have completed 48" of braid for the front window, toward an end goal of approximately 66". That probably still sounds like I’m a long way off, but I’m about to hit a major psychological milestone that should give me a much needed second wind to complete this. That milestone is 50", and it’s just two inches (or an hour of Judge Judy plus an episode of Law & Order Criminal Intent) away.

Once I reach 50", then I have just 16" inches to go. Every inch I complete from that point forward will feel like a more important inch than any I’ve done up to this point. Of course, I’ll want to do a much more accurate measure of the length I need before I cut the braid off the bobbins, so 66" may in fact be 70". But at that point little shall I care.

To be quite honest, I’m getting sick of this project. It’s not that the process is unpleasant, or the product less than desirable. It’s that it is taking such a tremendous amount of time out of each and every day, and the trim/curtain are major obstacles in my anniversary “house completion” goal. I can, and have, worked on other things instead of or alongside the trim. But every day I do that pushes my completion back another 1-2 days. In other words, it whacks the joy out of both the curtain/trim project, and whatever project I slid alongside.

Speaking of joy, last weekend’s trip to Home Depot rewarded me with the remaining 8 dowels I need for the Roman shades. Oh, sure. Dowels aren’t hard to come by, per se. But finding 8 straight dowels is unbelievably challenging. Fortunately, Home Depot seems to have recently received a new shipment of dowels, so I was able to find my 8 by only eyeballing half their inventory, instead of the entire inventory I usually have to sift through just to find 4.

Morning stroll.

2009-07-05T18:39:00.000-07:00

A BBC Post Made for Me

Oh happy day! Did you see this post? It gives me hope. Makes me feel that as a pot-a-day drinker I am working toward a positive end result - not simply feeding an addiction.

Not that Alzheimer’s runs in the immediate family. Oh, my grandfather’s grandmother suffered from age-related dementia many years before the medical community had given it a proper name. And then there’s my grandfather (her grandson), who - although never given such a diagnosis - beat his retirement home roommate over the head with his cane. Since this was a man he liked, there might have been a tad bit of dementia that came into play, me thinks.

But me? Naw. Not as long as there are coffee ground upon this earth shall I suffer from its perils.

2009-07-01T02:25:00.000-07:00

In Transit

Yesterday was one crazy-ass long day. It began simply enough with a client meeting, though that turned out to be much more extensive than most and took us straight to lunch. Before the day even began I knew that the rest of the day would be a write-off. Still, I thought that write-off time could be spent running a couple of errands but mainly weaving trim for the curtains. Would it? No.

From 12:15 to 7:45 p.m., we visited Pier 1 5 times. Not the same Pier 1. That would be weird. But three different Pier 1s in three different towns. And a visit to World Market thrown in for good measure. And the reason for this has goes back to that countdown clock you see in the left hand column.

I have determined that I will no longer appear to live in a half-done home. Given this, I am looking around the house with the eyes of a stranger. Some things are easy. Like all the mirrors and artwork sitting on the floor near where they will finally be hung. Or the half-painted rooms. Or the curtainless windows. Other things I have managed to shield from my vision, simply because of the immensity of the task ahead of us. But now that many of these items are now completed, I need to re-vision the home. And what I saw nearly made me barf.

The worst area turned out to be the solarium that for nearly an entire year has been furnished with folding all-weather camp chairs. And not even the deluxe kind with cup holders sewn into the arm rests. These have no arm rests. No cup holders.

To solve this issue we attempted to purchase two matching clearance wicker chairs and ottomans from Pier 1. Except that our local Pier 1 (store A) only had one. So after a grueling all-morning meeting at a client’s office, we stopped at that town’s Pier 1 (store B), and discovered that they had exactly one, too.

I asked the salesclerk to call my local store (store A) to ask them to hold their chair and ottoman, and then I would buy the one from this store (store B). She called store A. They still had the one, yes, but another person was en route to buy it. Quickly we did a phone order to secure the set from store A. Then we bought the set from store B. And we hauled it out to the car.

Where it would not fit, no matter how we twisted and turned the chair.

I called the parental units and drove to my father’s place of employment to borrow his vehicle. I left our car, then drove back to store B to pick up our furniture. Then we hit the highway to unload it at our house before we could drive to store A to pick up that set. Cushions? No time. We had picked up the car around 1:30, and my father got off work at 3. Especially with an absolutely necessary stop for gas, we had no time to spare.

Back to the house to unload furniture (have I mentioned that we hadn’t eaten yet?) then back on the highway at 2:30. Would I make it in time? Nope. Fortunately I had called my mother so she was there to pick him up when he got off work. We picked up our car, then caravanned to the parental home to return the folk’s car. After a quick swing through the drive-thru at Sonic for half-price drinks and an order of tater tots, we were back on the highway. We stopped at our home long enough to empty the trunk (the ottoman had fit) and use the facility, then we were back in the car, heading to World Market to buy a cafe table and two chairs for our patio (also on sale). You know, somewhere to have coffee in the morning, or beer in the early evening? We barely squeezed them the car, unloaded into the garage, then headed back out for cushions at store A.

Now store A had two matching seat cushions we liked, but only one cushion for the ottoman. So I had them check surrounding stores’ inventories. Store B had none. That left Kansas City, which has multiple locations, several of which showed between two and five of our cushion in stock. We called before putting the car in drive. The first store had two in inventory, but none in reality. The second had five in inventory, but none in reality. - You’ve probably determined by now that Pier 1’s inventory system is crap - The third (or was it the fourth?) had one ottoman pillow. By this time it was close to 6 p.m. We swung through a McDonald’s drive in for sustenance, then drove straight for store C in city C. There we bought not only that cushion, but a birdbath as well. Then back in the car.

We had left the house around 9:20 a.m., and finally returned home around 7:45 p.m. Talk about a long day! But soon, very very soon, one more room will be company ready. Paint, curtains (after the coupon World Market promised me arrives - we have a little less than 24 hours before I start getting pissed off ) and a shade cloth currently on order from Home Depot will round out the staging phase of the solarium. More will come later. We plan to replace several panes of glass with screen/storm inserts, and level out some weird rough fill holes in the floor, for example, but these are things that we will know about, not the world at large.

Onward.

2009-06-29T09:23:00.000-07:00

Another Actual Finished Object

I know. It’s been like months and months (or at least it seems that way from here) but I’ve managed to crank out yet another finished object in the space of about a week. Yay me!

This pillow is made of red corduroy fabric, containing a panel of hand spun wool knit on 20mm needles. (Yes, I know. Twenty mm needles don’t exist on conversion charts, but they bear a clear 20 on the ends, and they are slightly larger than my US 35/19mm needles, so I maintain that they are indeed 20mm needles.) I stuffed it with a 21 x 21 pillow form.

I blogged about spinning the fiber here and here. It didn’t take long at all to knit up. I think I finished this on the drive to New Mexico in March. But then the backlog of higher priority projects, combined with excessive travel demands, pushed completion to the back burner.

Originally I had envisioned making two pillows, and having the knit panel cover one entire side. However, not only did I not have sufficient pencil roving to achieve this (1 coil spun loosely made 1 singles) but even adding two singles of another dark-colored roving to ply, and knitting at a large gauge, it only produced enough length to make approximately 1 16x16 panel. So I modified my design to create a piped window of corduroy surrounding the knit panel.

I actually like the resulting look better than the original design. How often does that happen?!

I have enough fabric to make a second pillow. But I think I’ll set this on the back burner, and not even call it an unfinished future project. So much to be done, and so little time!

The one year anniversary of moving into our home is coming up late August. My intention is to have each room in our house looking “finished” and “decorated.” That is to say, when strangers to walk in I want them to believe the house is done, though we will know that we have plans to rip this or that out, replace that other thing, tear down that butt-ugly thing, etc. That goes for the yard, too.

Unfortunately, for twenty-two years we lived in a home that was filled with obviously unfinished projects. I’m not sure I know how to live any other way.

2009-06-23T11:18:00.000-07:00

We’re Havin’ a Heat Wave

And no doubt. Actual temps have been in the mid- to upper-90s, with heat indexes 100+. It’s not fit for man nor beast out there. Time to seek out a few culinary cures.

Sick and tired of ice tea? I know we are! SouleMama tempted me with her adult variation on rhubarb soda, which includes the addition of tequila and fresh lime juice. Her inspiration actually impelled me to leave my air conditioned home for a sprint across a searing asphalt parking lot in order to seek out the necessary ingredients.

Well worth it! This is the first time I’ve ever made or perhaps even tasted rhubarb anything. The soda was delicate and slightly sweet without being overpowering, and the tequila blended perfectly without being obvious. It was the perfect party drink. This size glass only contained an ounce of tequila, so it certainly wasn’t strong. The only thing missing was a drink umbrella.

Rhubarb is in season, and so are blueberries. Unfortunately blueberries were a no-show at the local farmer’s market Saturday, but that didn’t stop me from picking up a pint at the grocer. Plump and juicy, they were the perfect addition to a new-to-me blueberry muffin recipe in my all time favorite cookbook, penned by the employees of a regional hospital in Ohio. Unlike most blueberry muffin recipes I’ve seen, this one called for whole wheat flour. It proved to be a major hit, rich and wholesome, yet delicately sweet. I sprinkled them with Swedish pearl sugar before baking.

More cookbooks are calling.

2009-06-22T10:34:00.000-07:00

OMG—an Actual Finished Object!

Yes indeedy, I have finally completed Knit Meat in a Cheesecloth Sandwich! This is one of several projects I mentioned during the last knit group, saying that I would probably finish off in the near future because I have the luxury of being home for a long stretch. The knit core could have traveled, but I needed my sewing machine to finish it up.

Sorry for the weird photo sizes. iPhoto won’t let me grab thumbnails any more, so I’m navigating my way through Flickr solutions. Haven’t found the magic bullet, yet.

You will see that this provides ideal privacy screening, while still letting in enough light that we can see if someone is at the door. It also continues to provide an unobstructed view for the feline contingent.

I’m exceedingly happy with the results. It is a fresh, new design while hinting at exotic destinations. And at the same time, it is highly functional.

2009-06-22T04:01:00.000-07:00

Project Metrics

Calculating project progress is rife with danger. It is intended for motivation, but the results can be deflating. For example: You mean I have to work on this project three hours a day for the next three months to have a chance in hell of getting it done?

For projects that have been around a little too long, like fish in the refrigerator, even startlingly short projections can lead to procrastination: I’ve been working like a dog on this project for two months, and could use a break. If I am only a week away from being done, what’s the harm in starting work on that set of cushions? Just to get a start, you know?

So as much as possible, I try to avoid such projections. I may shoot for a completion date, but measuring progress mid-stream is to be strongly avoided. And yet, I could not avoid it on the kumihimo woven trim destined for the main curtain panel of my new living room window.

I think it’s fair to say that most of us need small rewards as we work. Reaching landmarks and meeting mid-stream goals does wonders for keeping up the enthusiasm levels for long projects. In sweater terms, it’s like hitting the underarm bind-offs on the sweater body, or completing sleeve #1. But with my braid, I had met all those wonderfully obvious progress indicators. I had woven until my counterweight bag hit the floor for the first time, and repositioned it higher. I had woven until the leading trim end touched the floor. Now, and for the foreseeable future, my progress can only be measured by literally measuring it.

I set Sunday aside as a braiding day. I had other things I was working on, but the large block of the day was to be spent sitting at the maru dai stand. Early in the day I measured the completed braid from top to bottom: 26"
Rough measurement of total completed braid needed for project: 66"
Amount remaining to be braided: 40"

Okay. That’s not terrible. That means I’m over 1/3rd of the way through. And while it seems like I’ve been working on this forEVER, there were large gaps of time when work and travel prevented me from progressing for days on end.

Now, if that is how much I need to braid, and I am hoping to have this completed curtain up by Labor Day weekend, is it even possible to meet that goal? To test this, I placed a large paperclip on the braid as close to the top as possible, turned the television to a court show I had recorded last week, and opened my iPhone clock app to its timer function, setting it to play a Marimba in 10 minutes. Then I started weaving.

I tried to work steadily, but not super-fast. After all, I might be able to sprint at lightning speed for ten minutes, but the results wouldn’t be representative of a marathon session. At the end of the ten minutes I measured. I had made approximately 1/2" of braid. That would be 3" an hour.

As exciting as that sounds, I know to halve this, in order to be realistic. During my sprint session I did not have to let any more length out from my bobbins. That takes time. Nor did I have to chase a bobbin across the room that fell of its hitch. That takes time, too. And there’s the back stretching, and trips to the fridge for more tea, and trips to tea disposal facility, and cat scritching, etc. But still, there was hope. And not only will it be possible to complete my curtain for Labor Day, but I think it could be done by the end of July!

Between two half-hour court shows, and the movie Overboard, I was able to complete 5" of braid on Sunday. Woo HOO! Perhaps by the end of today I will have reached the 50% point!

That’s the maximum I can physically work on this project, even on days when it is the #1 Priority. After a while, sitting forward in a chair that is meant to be set back in, and leaning over a maru dai stand, begins to take a toll. But still, knowing how close I am will make it easier to justify more time spent at the stand in the future. Today, for example, I will 100% guilt free weave while my Judge Judy’s are on, and I’ll look for a second hour of something to weave as well. Two inches is my goal for today.

2009-06-19T09:06:00.000-07:00

2 Finished Object(let)s, and Strolling through History

After much distress and several meltdowns (including one at the point of installation), I have finally finished the two outer Roman shades for my new front window. Now that they are hung, I see that I need to tack down the room darkening shade lining at the top because it wants to sag and pull the sides in. But other than that, DONE!

I am still working on the woven trim for the larger middle panel, but am approximately 1/3rd way through that process. I call that progress! And since I will likely be home for the next 6-8 weeks, there are plenty of Judge Judy’s that will enable me to continue to make real progress.

A relative is coming to town over Labor Day weekend, and this will be the second visit to our new home. I hope to have the main shade completed for his visit. We’ll see.

The family furniture hit another delay, due mainly to late locks that now won’t be delivered until my restorer is on vacation. But its anticipated return has got me focusing on family history. After going to all this work and expense to have them restored, I want to assemble an information booklet that will stay with the pieces after they are passed on to the next generation. Yes, I’m still young-ish, but the time to deal with this is now when I still have an older generation who can clarify and correct any questions I may have regarding their lineage.

My grandfather’s aunt put wrote a several hundred page tome that includes the ancestry in question, but I’ve always struggled with its organization. Who is related to whom, exactly, has always baffled me. And this history is quite extensive. Let me stress: quite extensive. If I am interpreting this correctly, and the person she names is the same as the person who popped up in a google search, then I appear to be directly related to a man who earned a knighthood because he surveyed the lands taken from the Irish in 1603. Nice!

E-commerce has a way of smoothing many of life’s bumps, so it was e-commerce that came to my rescue with Reunion 9, a Mac-based software that allows me to enter names and known connections, and it, in turn, creates a graphic based family tree. Among other things. My summer evening and wee-morning hours will now be spent transferring names and dates from the history book to Reunion, and snail-mailing questions to an uncle who is the last living person to possibly stand a chance of knowing what my great-great aunt meant by this or that. My mother’s memory is as Swiss cheese-like as mine, and the gg aunt died about a year before I was born.

Being home for a block of time gives me the benefit of progress on curtains, progress on history, and will enable us to make not one but possibly two batches of homebrew, too! I’ve got a few questions for the supply site, but if all goes well I will be ordering an Irish red, and a honey wheat. These will be partial mash kits, so slightly more advanced than our initial batch. I can’t wait!!

2009-06-16T07:12:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the Land of Consumer Frustration

I am completely astonished that as sour as the economy is, and as many people purportedly lost their jobs, that there are still a good number of ninny’s in employ. Take our recent stay at a Hampton in eastern South Dakota, for example.

The rooms were delicious, yes. But the breakfast bar? I poured a glass of orange juice, and it had that thick furry, slightly earthy taste that I associate with juice dregs three weeks out of date. The hostess was busy at work in their kitchenette toasting muffins and bracing for the impact of a hotel full of pint-sized soccer hooligans who were in town for a tournament. It took four times of calling to her in an increasingly loud voice before she turned around. I told her that something was wrong with the orange juice, and had she tasted it because it tasted out of date. She responded “I’ll check the machine.” Which she did. As in she opened up the reservoir and peered inside.

Who does that? If I complained at a restaurant that the chicken smelled spoiled, would “I’ll check the oven” be an appropriate response? I don’t think so. Maybe if I had said it was undercooked, but not spoiled.

Or Borders.com yesterday. After I had another failed attempt to buy a book at the local brick and mortar, I tried ordering it online. Their web site prompted me that if I ordered another book, I would qualify for free shipping. So I did. And it also said that I would get free shipping if I requested that they be sent in as few shipments as possible. So I requested that as well. And yet, it charged me shipping.

I sent an email to their customer service department immediately, asking what was up. Turns out that because I requested that they be sent to my PO Box, free shipping was no longer available. EXCEPT THAT THE WEB SITE NEVER SAID THAT. And if I had known, I could have had it sent to my home address, or even to the brick and mortar store. Both would have been free. I made these points clear to customer service. What would have been the appropriate response is “would you like us to change your shipping preference on your order?” to which I would have answered yes, please. But no. Customer Service opportunity missed. I won’t even get into the legal ramifications of failure to disclose on their part. Someone will sue them at some point. Their lawyers can explain it to them then.

And then there was the conversation I had with the phone company today. I received a letter telling me my calling plan anniversary was coming up, and if I didn’t do something about it, there would be consequences X, Y and Z. Except that I had received the same letter in early May and had taken care of it then, switching my unlimited calling plan to a basic one at $5.97/month. With the arrival of the second letter I called again. Seems that the person I spoke to in May hadn’t done anything she said she had. Also seems that that $5.97/month plan she purportedly switched me to isn’t even offered anymore. What they do offer is a 200 minute/month plan that costs $1 less than my unlimited plan, and a 1000 minute/month plan that costs $19 more than my unlimited plan. Who would do that? Be locked into 1000 minutes for almost three times the price of unlimited minutes? No doubt I will be reviewing my July bill very closely!

At this rate I am quite happy that I’m not purchasing a car or house or a sweater’s worth of yarn this year. God knows how that would go wrong!

2009-06-14T10:29:00.001-07:00

Passing of an Era

Not only is Blue Heron (definitely) closing its doors, but Border’s seems to be on that same path. At least in my opinion.

Stopped in this morning to look for a few books and music. Once again they did not have the book I was seeking (increasingly the norm), and their music department was essentially empty racks. I toddled over to a customer service rep to ask when they would ever be done with their music reorganization. The answer? They are not. Downloads have cut into their CD sales so much that they are eliminating that department.

Hmmm. People not buying CDs? You mean like all the times I asked about specific music only to learn it wasn’t in stock? Could that have something to do with the fact that people aren’t buying music???

Today I made someone’s day. A friend and business associate was recently bemoaning the fact that his father had taken the family mincemeat recipe with him to the grave. It was true mincemeat, made with meat and not candied fruit rinds bound with suet. I promised him that I would check my grandmother’s recipe box when I got home. Sure enough, she had her own mother’s recipe tucked inside. In other words, it was my great-grandmother’s recipe. While her recipe did contain meat, it did not contain alcohol. Probably because she would have been making the mincemeat during Prohibition. So I sent him her recipe that called for chuck, along with a newer meatless recipe that uses brandy and sherry. Between the two, he’s well on his way to creating his own masterpiece.

2009-06-11T18:59:00.001-07:00

Winding Down

Still pouring down rain. We start home tomorrow without having (successfully) seen Mount Rushmore.

2009-06-10T16:46:00.000-07:00

Gray, Grayer, Grayest

Weather has gone from bad to worse. Oh well.

2009-06-09T04:13:00.001-07:00

More on the Glamorous Life of a Travel Writer

As with many longer-than usual trips, there is often an interval where this is my scenery for several hours:

Yes it is just as relaxing and enjoyable as it appears!

We’ve left Missouri behind and are now in a part of the country where this is the typical male working the reception desk:

Along the way, I’ve managed to make some progress on the knit pillow, moving on to safety orange phase.

Caves, bison herds and monumental stone carvings slated for the next few days. Looking forward to returning home sometime this weekend.

2009-06-04T05:56:00.000-07:00

Happy Anniversary!

The anniversary of closing on our new home, that is. Theoretically, gone are the days when I find ditched narcotics and stolen purses gutted of their contents and stashed on my lawn. Now I’m living in the land of waving neighbors and gifts of plants left on my stoop. And one butt-munch neighbor, but my plan is to steer clear of him for as long as humanly possible.

It seems my new lawn appreciates all our hard work, and so it gave us the gift of flowers.

These lilies were apparently here last year, but I swear they never bloomed. Kinda says something about the state of things pre-sale, doesn’t it?

Instead of being able to celebrate by admiring the results of our work - and perhaps knocking a few more things off our to-do list - we found ourselves back on the road where we will be living for the next few weeks. I love the look of clothes after being stuffed in a suitcase for a days on end.

Gramma Phyllis, thank you very much for your suggestion regarding my curtains. I managed to get the outer two panels sewn up with mixed success. Tear-off was something I had considered, but I was concerned that bits would be caught in the sewing and always very visible and noticeable. However, another thought occurred to me as I read your comment: parchment paper. I think I’ll try that when I move to the center panel. It’s a much wider panel than the outer two, and therefore will be much more problematic.

I’ll try to post a few photos of our travels as we go.

2009-05-28T09:26:00.001-07:00

New Essential Tool for the Knitting Bag

Bought new sheets yesterday (bamboo - yum!), and what I once thought of as trash, I now see as handy heavy-duty and see-through small project and tool bags. How on earth did I ever get along without them?

2009-05-26T09:43:00.000-07:00

That’s a Conundrum

Memorial Day Weekend’s numero uno prior-i-TAY was to complete the blinds for the new living room window. I say “complete” but I really mean partially complete as in outer blinds 1 and 3 and not the center blind that will require the braiding that is molasses-slow when I’m working on it steadily and not progressing at all other times like, well, now.

Once again, these babies are Roman shades, which I’ve done eight times already for this house in other rooms. Requires math and the ability to cut a straight line at right angles to the other straight lines. Also requires the use of tools normally found in a garage, and a bit of lumber. But other than that, very straight forward.

I lined all my other blinds with a thin lining fabric, and that was pretty much okay. The lining fabric was poorly made or perhaps under too much tension when it was placed on the roll—or perhaps both—which torqued it and twisted the grain. That meant that cutting the dern thing at a right angle to the selvage was about 2" off grain from one side to the other. Or I could cut with the grain and it would be cut at an angle. The solution was to pull the fabric from one corner to its opposite, righting the grain along with it. Doing so was only partially a success, and created a bubble in the center of the panel. But all sins were absolved successfully once they were sewn and hung.

But using that type of lining on the living room was absolutely not going to work. Because the living room has the television, gets late afternoon light, and the lining fabric lets too much light shine through.

So this time around I went for a thick light blocking lining. Unlike the previous lining, this is more of a vinyl product.

Before I get into my current challenge, I will share a bit of background on this project. You see, this set of curtains has been a pain in the ass from day 1.

Issue a: it is a lightweight fabric without clear grain lines

Issue b: it has a clearly repeating pattern, but one that floats up from left to right

The above two issues combined has made creating straight and perpendicular cuts frustratingly difficult.

Issue c: There are three flat panels that butt up against each other, with the center panel sufficiently wide that it is made up two lengths of fabric. Because the panels are flat, the patterns not meeting or meeting would be extremely noticeable.

Okay then, match the patterns up, right? Easy peazy. Except that the pattern repeats float. To solve this I had to first sew two lengths for the center panel, perfectly matching the pattern (or as much as I could, because as I discovered, the machinery puckered a bit during the manufacturer’s embroidering process. And it does not meet up perfectly along its length). Then I found the correct width to cut the newly created large panel with its requisite 2" side seams. I turned under the seams, pressed and pinned them.

Next I had to find where the pattern met up with the left side panel, keeping in mind the 2" side seam. That meant matching the pattern left and right, and up and down. And remember, I couldn’t just butt the fabric of the left panel to the middle. I had to find where it met factoring in the side seam. This was much more difficult than it sounds.

Once I found the correct right edge of the left panel, I found the correct left cutting edge. Then I had to trim the right seam allowance down to the correct 2".

And start the above process for the right panel.

Have I lost you? Probably. But you at least get the idea that I was super-pleased when I finally had the entire set of panels cut to their proper width and length, and all seams and hems turned, ironed, and hand-stitched. Relief!

So here I am on the home stretch of the curtain project. The lining is cut. The lining is hand-sewn onto the facing fabric. I have made the dowel sleeves, and marked the curtains with their correct positions. It is the afternoon of Memorial Day. This is possible folks! Now I’m sewing the dowel sleeve onto the panel. And that’s where things went wonky. Because I am sewing through three layers of a thickish vinyl product that is grippy, along with one layer of a very thin and pliable fabric. The presser foot grips the lining, while the feed dogs struggle to push the fabric along, resulting in a gathered facing fabric.

Before I ripped and started again, I decided to take my problem to my local fabric store (not the good one, but the one where I bought the cheapass kicking my butt material I’m struggling with).

The consensus there is that I am “in a conundrum,” and that there is absolutely nothing I can do that will work well, except perhaps to hand sew the pockets on. And this is something I am not willing to do. I have done plenty of hand sewing, sure. But this is would be through three layers of thick vinyl and a thinner fabric. Do you have any idea how difficult that would be? To give you an idea, I accidentally pulled the heads off about half a dozen pins while I was working on making the dowel sleeves, simply because the vinyl is so darn grippy. So the thought of handsewing it kinda makes me want to ralph.

Time to bring out the fabric scraps for a bit of experimentation. And pins, lots of pins with good strong heads, are my friend.

2009-05-23T18:55:00.000-07:00

Beauty and the Beast

First, let me assure you that he is fine. A bit angry, sure. Who wouldn’t be given the circumstances, I say.

Today I toddled out to the garage to retrieve a tool I needed for my current curtain project (because seamstresses requires tools from the carpentry world to complete curtains, right? Oh, maybe that’s just me.) and I glanced down to the corner where the mole had resided last fall and where we still had a few glue traps strewn about, and I saw this:

It’s a skink, as far as I can tell. And it’s either an endangered broadhead skink, or the more common five-lined skink. One of the two. Apparently they are so similar in appearance that it requires a close examination of the scales to tell them apart. As you see here, it is thoroughly and decidedly glued down, but alive.

This is where all my hours of Animal Planet’s “Animal Heroes” and A&E’s “The Exterminators” viewing has paid off. I immediately went to the kitchen to retrieve a bottle of vegetable oil, and used the oil to coat the glue. Then, using gloves and a small stick, I began to gently pry the little beast off the glue. I assumed it would panic as soon as it was mostly free, so I attended to its appendages first in order to prevent it from possibly breaking a limb in a final escape attempt. First was the tail, which got him down to one glue trap. Then the back legs, torso, front legs, and finally the neck and head.

The process angered and frightened him a tad. Thus the evacuation of the bowels. But in the end we got him free of all the goop, and he dashed off for the safety of a nearby bush.

First a baby bird and now a skink... I seem to be racking up the points in the animal rescue department this week.

Now that we have covered the beast part of this post, it’s time for beauty:

Stunning.

2009-05-21T15:02:00.000-07:00

Non-travel Knitting

The night before venturing out to Holland, I cast on for Berroco’s Can-Can in Seduce. This is a delightful lace tunic in fiber that slips through the fingers like spun gold, and I imagine that it and a simple black dress would make the perfect travel companions for a suitcase stuffed with clothes, a/v equipment, and travel brochures.

Did I think it would be an optimum car project? No, but I thought if I were careful, very very careful, that I could get maybe two or four rows done in a day.

That plan worked perfectly on the way to Holland. Rows 1-4 went smoothly. No knitting happened in Holland because the days were so freaking long and exhausting that when we finally returned to our room at night, all I wanted to do was curl up in those luxurious bamboo sheets (described by someone close to me as being like “sleeping with kittens”) and fall fast asleep.

On the way home I spent the first half of the trip organizing my notes and a/v files. Then I pulled out Can-can, and it all went wrong.

First, there are lots of SSK’s in this pattern, and I was on row 5 where SSK’s live and breathe. Second, while trying to work an SSK with my stumpy-nosed needles, the cap on the back end of the needle got caught on the seat belt.

I pulled gently to free it, but the silky fiber flew off the working tip of my slicker-than-snot needle. All of a sudden I had knit lace stitches in the air. I tried to recover them, really I did. But the stitches really wanted to come undone…

and then the car hit a bump…

and it all went dark.

This morning I went to my LYS and bought a new needle, one that was less slick and more pointy, and will attempt again after I have FROGGED attempt #1. I think this is the wise thing to do, as later rows call for an SSSK.

This project won’t see the inside of a moving vehicle again until it’s off the needles.

And a brief baby bird update. Went out to check the hops this afternoon, and I nearly stepped on the little guy. He made it to the sunken garden after I released him yesterday. He’s hopping around and trying out his wings, but has low skills. His mother is still feeding him, so that’s good. As long as the roaming neighborhood cats or predatory birds don’t spot him, he should be fine.

2009-05-21T03:18:00.000-07:00

Hey Lady, Whatja Doin’?

Yesterday I started sorting out my craft room a bit, uncovering my half-done curtains and sewing machine for the holiday weekend when miracles will occur and I will get the outer two panels finished. In the window well over my sewing machine I found this staring in at me:

He’s a novice flier, and he seems to have landed in a place with a tricky take-off. I kept on eye on him for a few hours, and noticed that a female sparrow kept landing on the rim chattering loudly to him, but not flying down to feed him. And he was making no effort to fly away.

I debated about interfering, but after confirming that there wasn’t a nest in the well, and realizing that if I didn’t do something I would forever imagine a dying and then dead baby bird above my sewing machine, I donned my garden gloves, picked him up, and set him on the lawn. A hour later I checked, but he was gone. Two hours later I spotted him in the nearby red bud tree. Fingers crossed, this is one baby that has a chance.

2009-05-19T12:10:00.000-07:00

Tending my Hops…

in my new wooden shoes. I’m told that they are exceedingly comfortable when wearing several pairs of thick socks. Hmmm. Sounds like a knitterly solution to me!

2009-05-19T04:13:00.001-07:00

Incredible

Even with one last morning interview, we made it home in one very long day. By the looks of things, we’ve had some intense rain storms while we were away.

This is the Grand River outside Chillicothe, Missouri. Or rather, that’s well beyond the banks of the Grand River.

At home we have a wee bit of water seepage at one end of our basement, and the force of the runoff pushed mulch off one of our planting beds. Note to self, replace mulch with river rock in the runoff stream.

Yesterday we visited our furniture at the restorer’s. It is within an eyelash of being finished. The major piece gleams with its new shellac finish and freshly shined brass hardware. The locks are still out, though. The locksmith took them to a place in Kansas City because he did not have the proper blanks. The gaming table just needs a quick spray of finish to fix an adhesive accident we had within a month of getting it refinished 15 years ago. The footstool is refinished, but awaiting upholstery. The upholsterer appears to be behind in his work.

Given these small delays, and our upcoming travel schedule, we may be looking at late June before they come home. That’s okay. As much as I want the furniture here with me, I would rather that we take our time and do it right. No sense in rushing just to have it sitting in an empty house while we are off gallivanting. It needs to be admired. Often. For lengthy periods. Something that the restorer and his young protege are attending to now while it is in the shop. He really pulled out all the stops on this one, and put way more work into it than he accounted for in his estimate. But it’s an older piece than he has ever worked on, built out of wood that is no longer available, using amazing craftsmanship. The screws are handmade. The wood is hand planed. It was built when Jefferson was running for the office of President of the United States. Like I said, it’s old.

We may hire a professional mover to bring it home. Or we may rent a cargo van and do it ourselves. If we do the latter, we can also use the van to buy a grill, patio seating, and a clump royal birch, none of which are emergencies, but all of which we will need to figure out how to haul home at some point anyway.

We managed to get the plants home safely, and put all the potted ones in the ground last night. Today I’ll take a break from work to plant the various bulbs and rhizomes.

Have a butt-load of work to do over the next two weeks. Yesterday afternoon two more assignments came down the pike, one of which is major and requires extensive coordinating, multiple interviews, and extensive hand-holding. Oh, and if they agree to be the subject of this article, then I’ll need to tack this lengthy stop on the tail end of a trip that has already had several things tacked onto the tail end of. When we walk out the door again, we may not be home again in a good long while.

There appears to be a rumor flying around amongst the pr hosts on my last trip that I am afraid of flying. That, apparently, because we often choose to drive rather than flying in. I guess it’s abnormal. I’m the elephant man of travel writing. We always drive to Arkansas, for example. Little Rock is seven hours away. By the time I drive to the airport, and get there at least an hour before boarding, then fly to a connecting city, then from the connecting city to Little Rock, it is about the same amount of time. Plus, as passenger, I can get a tremendous amount of work and or knitting done. Whereas there is little time that I can have my laptop on when we fly, and it takes a contortionist to wrench it out from under the seat and put it back in for take-offs and landings. And fees? Baggage fees, food, long-term parking. Need I go on?

If we had flown to Holland, I would not have been able to buy all my new fabulous plants, and I would have had to beg one of the pr drivers to take me here or take me there. Unless we had rented a car, and frankly driving is a whole lot cheaper. And I would not have been able to bring two six-packs of homebrew to share with my friends. Something that they appreciated in a major way. In fact, several people told me that it was better than any they had had in Michigan. (hee hee)

Afraid to fly? No. I’ve flown plenty. Aware that it’s often more convenient to drive? You bet.

The revelation about the rumor came about on the drive back to the hotel following our final dinner. Two other writers were in the far back seat listening in on the conversation. At one point I was explaining that I work on the road, and Michael likes to drive. That got the two writers in a heated debate about the difference between liking to drive, and liking driving. And did I say that Michael likes to drive, or he likes driving?

Inane? You bet. And just a tiny sliver of many inane debates and questions hammered on me by one of these two women. For example:

I said that I bought a six of Pickle Tink at Schmohz, and after I explained that that was beer (which I readily admit wasn’t obvious), lady #1 asked
What’s a six? (six-pack)
and
What do you plan to do with it? (drink it you moron)

Having our own car also means that we rarely share a ride with other writers.

Why do we like to drive (or is it that we like driving)? You tell me.

2009-05-17T02:54:00.000-07:00

Knitting Amongst the Tulips

Good morning from tulip-y Holland. No, not the Netherlands. Holland. Holland, Michigan.

The town is winding down after their massive tulip festival. Tulips are everywhere, lining the curb block after block after block, and thick in planting beds. Some are passed their prime, but many are still strong and beautiful.

Holland has at least one and possibly two wonderful knitting stores. Unfortunately my schedule has prevented me from visiting up to now, and today they are closed and we leave for home. So be it. I brought with me two new projects that I cast on just before we left home. I’m not aching to buy more wool just to feel more behind in my all my projects.

Yesterday we went to the annual kite festival on the beach in Grand Haven.

And while there we swung through downtown to visit Ground Zero for my knitting obsession. Four years ago it was a little yarn shop with a wonderful inventory and fantastic customer service. Or it was, because the owner relocated the store to a neighboring town a few years ago, before finally closing its doors altogether. But again, more wool is something I do not need.

But we did make a few purchases on the way back to the hotel. We stopped at West Olive Nursery, which just happened to be having the first of their twice a year nursery stock sale. Our back seat is now full of bushes and ornamental grass, that added to a sack of day lily bulbs and rhizomes I bought at Veldheer a few days ago = work for me as soon as we get home, and much jealousy from neighbors shortly thereafter. I also bought a very special pair of new gardening shoes. Pics on that to come.

We finished last night with a tour of the Holland lighthouse. Here’s a sneak peak of one of my new projects.

2009-05-08T05:23:00.000-07:00

Joy is…

Visiting a lawn and garden center so big, they issue their customers golf carts.

And among the immensity, finding a rare and beautiful variety of birch that will someday make its way home to us.

See the leaves? They are cinnamon!