Not to brag . . .

You and Me, Under the Stink Tree

2009-07-15T21:43:00.010-05:00

We have a massive tree in our backyard. It is, to quote an arborist, of "extraordinary girth," NTB, especially for a tree in a fenced-in yard of less than 200 square yards. If you saw the size and position of the tree and the position of our house and garage, you might feel nervous. I only feel nervous about it every once in a while.

When the tree guy came to see about our tree, he identified it as a Tree of Heaven. I was charmed by that name and got carried away thinking about how high it is and how cool it is to look up and see the sky through its leaves and how the shade it provides is heavenly. How many families, I wondered, have enjoyed its shade? How many kids played beneath it? There is a metal hook in the side of the tree, about fifty feet up. It may have been placed there the last time the tree was trimmed, but I prefer to think that it served some purpose (hook for hanging basket? foot hold to reach tree house?) for the tree's "owners" many years ago and then grew with the tree. Our house was built in the 1890s, but I even wonder did the tree precede the house? I'm telling you it is a really big and really old tree. Then, I start to wonder what my neighborhood looked like before there were houses 2-3 feet from each other on a perfect grid for miles and miles . . .

But, back to my Tree of Heaven. After the tree guy identified it for us, I did a wee bit of research. I learned that it is also called a "stinktree" (ours doesn't, for the record), that it is not a native tree, and that it is targeted for removal in many national forests because it gives off toxins or something that keep other trees and plants from growing as they should. Basically, our yard is dominated by an enormous exotic weed.

Our tree got a haircut today. Three guys spent several hours with ropes and a bucket truck trimming dead branches and those live ones too close to the roof of the garage and to the power lines. I was so impressed with the daring and technique it requires to keep trees healthy. Very impressive. When I looked outside the back window two hours before I was supposed to be hosting Bub's preschool class for a playdate/pizza party, our entire yard (and part of our neighbors') was covered in tree branches and leaves. Just a wee bit nervous, but everything was cleaned up in plenty of time.

The highlights of the party: sunshine, warm breeze, and parents and kids hanging out under the heavenly shade of our stinktree.

Bub knows how to pick them.

2009-07-08T22:34:00.008-05:00

A few weeks ago, hubby was putting Bub to bed and asked him, "Who's your best friend?" Bub answered, apparently without hesitation, "Little Bit." I'm sorry that I didn't witness the exchange but even imagining it warms my heart and gives me some assurance that whatever mistakes we are making as parents, we are doing something right if our boys love each other. And really, what's not to love? NTB.

This post is the one I've been meaning to write ever since Little Bit celebrated his first birthday. Words will fall short of capturing how much joy he has brought into our home and our hearts, full-to-bursting really. But to keep this post from verging too far into the sappy and sentimental, I am going to focus on the reasons why Little Bit is and will be such a good “best friend” candidate for Bub and the other little buddies he will meet along the way.

1. Little Bit is a happy guy. He just is. He smiles (almost) all the time, lighting up the room with the big, bright blue eyes.* If he’s unhappy, you’ll know it but it won’t last long. He laughs a lot. It’s an infectious and surprisingly deep sort of laugh for a little guy, and it doesn’t take much to provoke it . . . a quick game of peek-a-boo, attempting to feed mommy crumbs from his high chair tray and then pulling them away at the last second, watching Bub parade around the family room with his underwear on his head, being tickled. In fact, he likes being tickled so much that “tickle, tickle, tickle” is one of the only understandable things that he says.

2. Little Bit is usually game for anything. Want to empty a box of Kleenex tissue by tissue? Want to paw through a drawer filled with baby food and remove the cardboard wrapper and plastic lid from each? Want to climb stairs, the back of the couch, and the Pottery Barn chairs and come thisclose to falling? Want to rip up paper or eat crumbs off the floor? Explore and taste gadgets like the phone and remote control? Little Bit is your man.

3. Little Bit likes to dance. Wouldn't you like to have a best friend who dances? A dance-off with the battery-powered dancing Brobee from Yo Gabba Gabba is a daily event. Little Bit will also bob up and down when Bub succeeds in getting mom or dad to play “Boom Boom Pow” for the one millionth time. Although it’s not officially a dance move, Little Bit has a quirky but surprisingly speedy hop-along style crawl wherein he sweeps/hooks one leg in an odd manner. It’s a sight.

4. Little Bit likes to meet new people. He’ll be the kid to go to camp or the back-to-school dance with because he seems delighted any time there’s anyone new to look and smile at. We were at Einstein’s Bagels this morning, and Little Bit was sitting in a high chair with his back to the door. Each time someone entered the restaurant, he turned around to smile and squeal, winning a lot of return smiles and greetings. His attitude toward life and the people he encounters seems to be, “Hey, why not be happy?!” Why not, indeed. I hope his smiles continue to brighten the days of others. A warning for his friends during the adolescent years though, he does seem to be a flirt. He can charm prospects, but may not be content to play wing man. We'll have to see.

5. He will be lots of fun at slumber parties because he does not seem to have trouble being awake at night.

6. He likes to eat. The ability to take pleasure in food is, in my book, a key quality that a friend should possess. The good eater switch finally got turned on around Little Bit’s first birthday and now he is going to town on a variety of foods. Favorites include watermelon, blueberries, and grilled cheese sandwiches coated in tomato sauce. He eats with gusto and murmurs "mmmm" after particularly tasty bites. He got a hold of one of Bub’s sippy cups the other day and sampled some chocolate milk before I could stop him. He’s definitely a fan, but we’re not going there yet and have had to become more vigilant about keeping track of Bub’s cups. I like that he goes after what he wants.

NTB a given for all of the above and, of course, a disclaimer that notes that our one year old can whine with the best of them, is stubborn, is the messiest eater in Cook County, and still does not sleep through the night. Still, we’ll keep him, treasure him even.

I hope Little Bit will continue to be his bit brother’s best buddy and hope that he will live a fully and happy life with true and loyal friends and more than enough love and laughter.

I’m not lucky enough to be Little Bit’s best friend. I’m even luckier. I’m his mom. I know his daddy feels the same. Little Bit is a joy.

Happy Birthday to Bub’s best friend Little Bit. And many more.

*He has his daddy’s eyes. Usually I look at Little Bit and just see Little Bit but there are moments when I look at him and see him as my husband’s mini me and it just blows my mind.

Chew-R-S

2009-07-01T21:04:00.010-05:00

Some things I want to remember years from now when Bub and Little Bit are all grown up and possibly giving speeches or otherwise impressing people with their language skills:

1. The part of the ABC song when Bub belts out, "Chew-R-S-T-U-B."*

2. The fact that Little Bit's first recognizable utterance besides "dada" is the phrase "tickle, tickle, tickle," complete with hand motion. So adorable, NTB.

3. Bub's love for the books Corduroy and A Pocket for Corduroy by Don Freeman and the way he pronounces Corduroy as CorduRORY.

4. The way Little Bit says something like "mmmm" after bites of watermelon.

What are you hearing these days?

*explains why some of our matchbox cars are called "bans" but not why all the "bans" are referred to with the adjective "rescue bans."

Thank you for the music.

2009-06-25T21:53:00.003-05:00

Initial reflections on my top Michael Jackson memories.

1. March 1984: I turned nine and hosted my first slumber party. My dad was out of town, but he made a scavenger hunt for me. My friends and I followed the clues from room to room in my house on Parliament Ct. and ended up in his office where I unwrapped a Thriller tape. I remember being, well, thrilled. My friends and I listened to it over and over. Apparently Thriller was released in December of 1982, which makes receiving the album in March of 1984 seem a little less thrilling. However, the trusty scholars at Wikipedia report that Thriller was topping the charts for eighty consecutive weeks. So there. My dad and I were still cool.

2. Spring 1989: My grade school had a week called "Everybody Counts" every year. At each grade level, you learned about various disabilities and handicaps and the importance of being kind, respectful, and sensitive. Seventh and eighth graders (only girls participated, but I assume boys were welcome?) could choose to give up some of their recess time over many weeks to learn to sign the lyrics to a song. Then, at the Everybody Counts all-school mass, you signed that song in front of the whole school after Communion. In seventh grade, it was "Lean on Me." In eighth grade, it was Michael Jackson's "Man in the Mirror." I have to say that the words of that song do still resonate with me. "That's why I'm starting with me . . ." I can still sign parts of both songs to this day, and boy would I love to see a videotape of the performance if such a thing existed.

3. 1993-1997: I can't remember how it started, but my college friends and I did a really stupid thing when we heard "Billie Jean." When Michael would sing, "She's just a girl that thinks that I am the one. The kid is not my son," we would then say, not sing, "That child is not my responsibility" in kind of a serious tone. Then, eventually, it morphed into, "This chair is not my responsibility." I don't know why, and I''m not even beginning to claim that we were funny, but I've been hearing "This chair is not my responsibility" in my head for a few hours now and it makes me smile.

What about you? Any Michael Jackson memories?

More Than a Little Bit Joyful!

2009-06-22T21:02:00.007-05:00

There's a post in the works, celebrating Little Bit and his first year. For now I will just note that today our happy, smiling baby turns one, and we are so thankful for the joy he brings us every single day.

Mama, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys.

2009-06-17T21:35:00.029-05:00

When I was a high school English teacher, I often socialized with other teachers and their significant others. Contrary to the suspicions of teenagers everywhere, English teachers do not sit around correcting grammar for kicks. But we do sometimes talk about books and when the subject of reading came up, the husband of my friend/colleague (next-door classroom neighbor) had one contribution to the conversation: "Have you ever read Lonesome Dove?" Each time he mentioned the novel, his wife would sigh or roll her eyes or flat out say, "No one wants to hear about Lonesome Dove."

It's not that I would not have wanted to hear about Lonesome Dove. It's more like nothing I heard about it would have made me think I would like it. When I heard the title, I always conjured images of Texas, dust, and tired horses. When, a couple of years ago, my friend Actchy read and enjoyed Lonesome Dove, I decided to use one of my audible.com credits to obtain the audio download for my ipod. But I didn't seriously consider listening to it. I still didn't think I'd like it. Texas, dust, tired horses. Urgh.

A few weeks ago, I was pretty much out of audiobooks for my ipod and decided to give Lonesome Dove a try. The first thirty minutes of listening are all about how it's really hot, dusty, and boring in Texas. I did not know if I could handle thirty-six more hours of dust, heat, and tired horses.

Well, I LOVED Lonesome Dove. I laughed. I cried. I marveled at Larry McMurtry's masterful weaving together of so many narrative threads. Each plot line was my favorite one while I was listening to it, with the exception of a few sections that made me so stinking anxious I could barely listen.

"I don't feel good about those Suggs boys," I would tell my husband, who had already read the book. "Are they as bad as I think they are?" Or, "How much do you love Deets? I really love Deets." "Is something going to happen to Newt? Just tell me because I'm going to stop listening right now if that's the case." "Blue Duck is just so evil. I feel sick just thinking about him." "Weren't you so intrigued by Po Campo?" He had to kindly remind me that he read the book in 1996, not last week.*

Reading Lonesome Dove, I learned about a time and place in history that I've never really thought about: the post-Civil War West. I feel foolish admitting this, but I never thought about "how the West was won." Had no idea what Texas Rangers were (not a baseball team?). I had never really thought about what cowboys did besides wear hats and ride horses. Had never paused to think about what a cattle drive was. Never really thought about how important it would be to have a good horse or why one would want to steal horses.

And you know how, if you visit some place like Gatlingburg, TN, you can dress up in those old clothes and get your picture taken. On two occasions, I have dressed for such pictures, choosing to wear one of the satin/lacy type dresses which, thanks to Lonesome Dove, I now realize were reminiscent of those worn by the whores who worked in the saloons.

More than anything, I can't get over how much courage or folly it would take to travel miles and miles into unknown, lonely terrain. I especially can't get over mothers sending their young sons on a cattle drive from Texas to Montana.

Lonesome Dove is a long journey but the hours spent in the company of McMurtry's characters are so worth the trip.

Other recent reads that I heartily endorse are as follows.
I'm Down by Mishna Wolff -- hilarious and thought-provoking coming-of-age memoir about a white girl whose father more or less thinks he is black and raises her and her sister in a poor, black neighborhood

I'm Sorry You Feel That Way: The Astonishing But True Story of a Daughter, Sister, Slut, Wife, Mother, and Friend to Man & Dog by Diana Joseph -- if the title doesn't sell you on this memoir, there's not much I can offer, except to say it is honest, well-written, and completely engaging

Admission by Jean Hanff Korelitz -- novel about a Princeton admissions officer coming to terms with her own past and the pressures of making decisions about the futures of so many applicants. I really loved this book.

Garlic and Sapphires: The Secret Life of a Critic in Disguise by Ruth Reichl -- I can't believe I have not read Ruth Reichl before, but this memoir of her years as the New York Times restaurant critic was fantastic. I will be seeking out her two previous memoirs ASAP. I hope to post on this one in more detail in the future, but I wanted to mention it now in case Top Chef Masters isn't tiding you food fanatics over until the new season begins.

As always, I want to know what you are reading? And, what's your "Lonesome Dove"?

*Inspired by my constant commentary on Lonesome Dove, hubby DVRd and has been watching the miniseries. I've only caught snippets, but I have to say that realizing that D.B. Sweeney of Cutting Edge fame plays top hand Dish Boggett really made my evening.

Bub's Got Game(s)

2009-06-14T21:27:00.014-05:00

Bub is developing an interest in boxed games like Candyland, Hi Ho Cheerio, Memory, Cootie, and a Thomas the Train game. His attention span and respect for the rules of play are still, ahem, developing, but he seems to enjoy himself. Plus, he is great, NTB, about cleaning up all the little pieces so Little Bit won't try to eat them. I play such games with Bub while Little Bit naps in the morning. Hubby plays with Bub before bed most nights.

With lots of rain and temperatures in the mid-fifties most of last week, we've had more indoor time this summer than anticipated and thus, more indoor games. NTB, but Bub has been thinking out of the box on some of most recent "games."

Here are some of Bub's favorites games with materials and instructions given from his perspective . . .

Mailing Letters
Materials Needed: candy, envelopes, stickers, crayons
Instructions:
1. Mention every five minutes that you want to go to the candy store.
2. Once your mom has given in or found some candy somewhere, ask her to dump it on the table.
3. Get to work filling envelopes with one or two pieces of candy in each.
4. Work with mom to put a sticker on the front of the envelope for a stamp. Remind her that you do not want any Winnie-the-Pooh stickers with Piglet on them because "the pig is sad."
5. Delegate as much as you can, as in, "You write my name on the envelope, Mom." She will probably make you trace your name.
6. Place envelopes in your own mailbox.
7. Start asking your mom when you can check the mail because you think you have some letters.
8. When she relents, open all the letters, even the ones you said were for Daddy. 9. Eat the candy inside.
10. Return to step 1.

Poker Chips
Materials needed: poker chips and caddy, Spray N' Wash (suppose Windex or non-aerosol hair spray would work in a pinch)
Instructions:
1. Dump all the poker chips out of the poker chip caddy and on to the basement floor.
2. While your mom is changing the laundry, spray as many chips as you can with Spray N' Wash.
3. Find a piece of dirty laundry from the pile and use it to start drying the chips.
4. Put the chips in the caddy as you dry them, reserving the black and white ones. Don't forget to scold your baby brother for trying to put away chips that have not been "washed and dried" yet and for not keeping black and white ones out of the caddy.
5. Tell your mom the black and white chips are for "making snowmen."
6. Take an extra pile of black and white chips and hide it in the guest room.
7. Once you have about 15 chips dried and back in the caddy, leave the rest on the floor so that you can skip step 1 when you are ready to play again.

Unnamed Game A
Materials: matchbox cars, silo from Fisher Price farm, tennis ball
Instructions:
1. Fill silo full of matchbox cars, leaving some room at the top.
2. Place tennis ball in top of the silo.
3. Empty silo and repeat.

Unnamed Game B
Materials: bin of baby and toddler shoes, toy hammer
Instructions:
1. Empty shoes on to the floor. Do it right in the doorway between the kitchen and family room so that no one can miss the fact that you are playing.
2. Use hammer to beat the shoes repeatedly.

Making Sand
Materials: sandbox with plentiful sand toys, neighbors
Instructions:
1. Stand on the deck and peer over the fence until you get the neighbors' attention.
2. Invite them over. (Your mom will not mind because she prefers inviting them over to having you invite yourself to their yard or stare over the fence with longing. Plus, she likes the neighbors.)
3. Make sure all the toys you own are out of the garage and strewn about the yard.
4. Once all the toys are out, ignore them and lure all the kids into the sandbox.
5. Remove your shoes and socks, no matter what the temperature.
6. Once there are five kids (ages 11 months-8 years) in the sandbox (3-4 feet in diameter), work together to create an elaborate system for filling, straining, dumping, and moving sand. This is called "making sand."
7. Make sure to get as much sand out of the box and into the yard as you can.
8. Throw a fit when it's time for dinner and no more sand can be made.
9. Ask the neighbors if they want to "make sand" every other time you see them.

What games do the kids in your life play? Please share in the comments.

Also, please don't forget to send in your recipes for the NTB Dips and Sips Summer Recipe Drive! For the price of one recipe, you will receive many! Pretty please.

Over the river and through the woods . . .

2009-06-07T21:05:00.026-05:00

I was fortunate enough to grow up less than ten minutes away from all of my living grandparents. When I visited my dad's parents, my grandma would give us dishes of vanilla ice cream and then get out all of her sprinkles (maybe eight different varieties, including the little silver ball ones) and let us have at it. I fondly remember stirring the ice cream until I had a sort of sprinkle soup. My grandma and grandpa also had a highboy in their living room and in its top drawer, there were at least fifty coasters in various styles and colors. I don't remember what I did with the coasters, but it's thirty years later, and I'm still picturing them. One of my favorite activities was exploring the basement which was full (packed to the gills) of stuff of all kinds. I've always been a stuff magnet, and it was a joy to nose around. I also remember playing with my aunt's old Barbie dolls and the special chest that housed their clothes. Now that I'm writing that, I wonder if her daughters did the same thing years later. Under a storage chest in their bedroom, my grandparents had a stack of Sunday "funny papers" being saved to wrap presents. I remember spending an afternoon reading months and months worth of Cathy comics.

I also have special memories of visiting my mom's mom's house. I remember sitting on her astroturf-covered front porch, blowing bubbles and eating popsicles. I remember walking to King Kwik to buy fun dip and other treats. I remember playing Hi Ho Cheerio. I also remember the clothes line in the back yard and the birdbath. There was also easy access to Brach's pick-a-mix candy in my Grandma's television room. Finally, like all my cousins, I have fond memories of drinking cold water from her rolling pin (it was plastic, filled with water, and stored in the fridge). As I write this, I'm also remembering the corner cabinet with the drawer for playing cards, the specialty display shelf that housed her thimble collection, and opening the oven to fill a little brown bowl full of the snack mix stored inside a roasting pan. I also associate The Little Red Hen with my Grandma H--better to be industrious than lazy, you know.

At both houses, I also recall drinking pop--cool stuff like Orange Crush and Red Cream Soda--from glass bottles stored in hot, old-smelling garages.

Right now, our boys are not lucky enough to grow up near their grandparents. Though that means that they and their grandparents miss out on spending as much time together as everyone would like, it also means that visits to and from grandparents are all the more special.

Recently we visited grandparents two weekends in a row. It's fun to see Bub forming his own special traditions and routines for these visits.

At Grandma and Grandpa's, Bub enjoys making coffee in the morning with Grandma, investigating the "treasure box" to see what's been added, helping clean the table, eating and sharing chocolate chip cookies, and playing with daddy and Aunt Shell's Fisher Price Little People Farm and Hospital.

At Grammy and Pop's, Bub likes conning Pop into taking him to go buy munchkins, helping Grammy water the plants and flowers (with way more access to the hose than he gets at home), playing with the old toys of his mom and aunts and uncles and a "few" new ones that Grammy has picked up, and spinning tunes on a Sponge Bob boom box that Grammy bought at Big Lots.

Grandma and Grandpa live in a country subdivision in Indiana with a park and ponds. With Grandpa and Daddy's help, Bub caught his first fish (actually, his first four fish, NTB) last visit.

Grammy and Pop live near "downtown" Fairfield, OH, but as when visiting Indiana, the boys see more trees and grass than they do at home. From the screened in porch, Bub and Little Bit saw five deer (all together) in the yard of my parents' neighbors. These same deer eat my mom's roses, which kind of stinks, but Bub thought it was pretty neat to see them so close.

Many farms are passed on the routes to both sets of grandparents, and Bub likes to note silos and tractors as we pass. He has even, NTB, become adept at identifying tractors by brand based on the tractor's color. He continues to ask if there are purple or pink tractors. Anyone?

When visiting Ohio, Bub also loves doing absolutely anything that involves his beloved cousins who are lucky enough to live about twenty minutes from Grammy and Pop.

Cousins Fancy, Swiper, and Bub dressed in Pop's t-shirts after taking a bath in Grammy and Pop's tub. I have no explanation for their decision to eat fruit snacks out of orange cups and place those cups on their heads as I took the picture.

Cousins Wookie and Little Bit conked out at Kings Island.

Any memories to share from visits with your grandparents? Please share.

REMINDER: Fancy Hummus, Vodka Slush, Frijole-Mole . . . The recipes are starting to roll in for the NTB Dips and Sips Summer Recipe Drive. Please consider participating!

Dips and Sips Summer Recipe Drive

2009-06-03T09:28:00.010-05:00

Despite the frigid spring temperatures in Chicago this week, I remain confident that summer weather will soon arrive. In honor of the season of fun, sun, and over-indulging with friends, I am pleased to announce the inaugural NTB Dips and Sips Summer Recipe Drive.

That's right, not a recipe contest but a recipe drive -- an effort to gather a bunch of people's best recipes that fit into the broad categories of "dips" (dips, salsas, spreads, easy appetizers, cracker/chip/pita/cut veggie-friendly foods) and "sips" (cocktails, mocktails, sangrias, punches, and the like).

Here's how it works . . .
1. Think of a recipe that you really enjoy!

2. Share the recipe with me and other NTB readers:
* Include any helpful hints, ingredient notes, serving suggestions, or variations you have to offer.

* Offer a brief blurb about the history of the recipe -- who gave it to you or if you, NTB, created it yourself, what was your inspiration? Special occasions the recipe suits? Past feedback from guests who sampled it? Why you enjoy making, eating, or sharing it? Just give us some little something to get excited about the recipe.

* List your name, a made-up name, or your blog handle. If you have a blog and want other NTB readers to know about it, give me the url and I will include it with your recipe.

3. By June 20th (DEADLINE EXTENDED to 6/28), email the recipe to mep at nottobrag dot net . Please also leave a comment saying that you are participating.

Each contributor will receive an official NTB Dips and Sips Summer Recipe Drive cookbooklet in your email inbox.* For free!

Throughout the summer, I will be testing out the Dips and Sips Recipes and blogging about it. I love having friends over to enjoy food and drink and plan to use the Dips and Sips Recipe Drive as extra motivation to plan some casual get togethers.

Please forward this post on to friends and other blog readers. My goal is to gather at least 50 recipes! Special requests for any cocktail recipes that include champagne. Thanks to a recent graduation, NTB, I have some around here.

It's going to be a great summer!

*I will not use your email address for anything but emailing you the cookbook file.

The Awesome and the Awkward

2009-05-27T20:59:00.015-05:00

Read It:
I just finished The Girls from Ames: A Story of Women and a Forty-Year Friendship, written by Jeffrey Zaslow (who co-authored The Last Lecture book with Randy Pausch). If you need a reminder to appreciate and nurture your female friendships, check it out. I have much more to say about female friendship (a whole dissertation full, as a matter of fact) so I'll blog more about girlfriends later. But, for now, let me just say how much I appreciate my Girls from Butler County and the way--whether by phone, email, facebook, blog comments, post office--you make me feel loved and inspire me to be the best version of myself that I can.

Eat It:
Kerrygold Dubliner Cheese. I buy the big brick of it at Costco, but it's also available in regular grocery stores. Melted on a sandwich thin with some ham and honey mustard, shredded on top of some scrambled eggs, sliced atop Triscuits . . . I can't get enough.

Admit It:
In the interests of pacing and sanity (someone gets pretty touchy if the Princess Frostine pink card goes to mommy or daddy), I sometimes stack the deck when I play Candyland with the Bub.

Let It Crack You Up:
Awkward Family Photos.com There were tears in my eyes when I checked this site out, and I will return regularly from now on. The photos are deliciously awkward and the titles and captions are the icing on the cake. Speaking of cake, I still want you to check out Cake Wrecks if you haven't already.

Resist It:
Speaking of awkward . . . Jon and Kate Plus Eight. I stopped watching midway through last season but found myself tuning in to Monday's episode to glimpse the train wreck of the new season. There are many things that can be and already have been said in the "What did they expect?", "I don't blame him/her" and "What's up with her hair" vein. No matter what you think of reality television or the specifics of the Gosselin family dynamics, there is something so profoundly sad about watching a marriage and thus potentially a family falling apart. I'm not particularly fond of Jon or Kate, but I cried while watching it and teared up again when I talked to LAP about it and described it to my husband. I hope that the Plus Eight make it through all of this as unscathed as possible. To that end, my gift to them it to stop watching from this point forward.

Okay, give me your own list of Read It. Eat It. Admit It. Let It Crack You Up. Resist It.

Heloise, if you please.

2009-05-20T21:10:00.010-05:00

I love reading the little helpful hint blurbs peppered throughout women's magazines. And, as a recovering magazine junkie, I have read many a hint in my day. I don't use the hints very often, though some are quite helpful, but I am always intrigued and/or amused by them. I like to wonder about the persons and lives behind such hints . . . The woman who dutifully saves all the crumbs from her chip and pretzel bags so she can sprinkle them atop a casserole. The home cook who figures out one more way to use up leftover Thanksgiving turkey. The individual who saves all of her warranties/product instructions in a binder with dividers. The mom who creates a "to do" jar to combat her children's complaints of "I'm bored." The person who discovers a new/better/cheaper/more efficient way of doing anything and feels moved to write in to a magazine to share the good news.

A few months ago, I read a helpful hint that left me wanting more. A woman wrote in to say that when her husband leaves to go pick up their pizza, she goes and lights their grill. That way, when her husband arrives home, the grill will be ready for the pizza. I have heard of people cooking pizza on a grill, but the hint made it seem as if this couple would be grilling an already cooked pizza. I started wondering how far they lived from the pizza place. Did the pizza get so cold on the way home that it needed to be warmed again . . . on the grill? Or, do they simply enjoy the flavor of grilled pizza so much that they want to add that extra step? Or, is there guilt involved with ordering a pizza so that the extra step of grilling it is some kind of penance? Perhaps this couple does not see convenience and immediacy of intake as one of the key benefits of ordering pizza. I'd love to know more.

I've always sort of wondered what helpful hint I would send in to a magazine if, you know, there was some situation where I had to come up with something. I already bragged about my new cutlery sorting/loading system, but I don't think it's original enough (compared to grilling cooked pizza) to warrant two inches of type.

On Saturday evening, I had a helpful hint breakthrough. There I was in the kitchen, mixing up some rice krispie treats for Bub's playdate the next day. I can't manage to memorize the recipe (so many ingredients, you know) so I glanced on the marshmallow package for guidance. I noted the phrase, "Using buttered spatula or wax paper, press mixture evenly into buttered 9x13 inch pan." In the past, I sprayed a spatula (bonus hint: the same one I used for mixing the ingredients) with cooking spray before molding the treats into the pan. When I read the directions on the bag, I thought, "Oh, butter would be better than cooking spray on that spatula." Then, I thought, "Wax paper would be nice too, but who keeps that around?" Probably lots of people do, but I'm not one of them. Then, I noticed the perfect item for pressing the treats into the pan. Wait for it . . . the BUTTER WRAPPER!!! I can't tell you how pleased I was when I thought of it. Sure, I could butter a spatula or grab a piece of wax paper, but why bother when you have a piece of buttered wax paper right before you that you were just going to throw away.*

So, there you go. Butter Wrapper. NTB.

I promise this is the last household hint post for a while. What else have you got for me? Do you stock wax paper in your kitchen? Have you read a helpful hint that left you wanting more? Any insights into the grilled pizza hint? Do you prepare rice krispie treats even though you don't personally like them all that much and then eat them until you feel sick?

*unless you know some hint for re-using butter wrappers . . . if so, speak up

Oh, go on with your bad self, MEP

2009-05-15T21:08:00.003-05:00

NTB, but I have formed a new good habit recently. I don't know what prompted it, but for the past two months or so, I have been sorting my silverware as I place it in the dishwasher. Our utensil thingy has five sections: forks, spoons, knives, sharp knives, and kiddie cutlery. I'm not sure why it has taken me so many years to get with the program on this. It only takes a few extra seconds to sort the stuff going in and yet makes the dreaded (for me) task of emptying the dishwasher far more bearable. The less I dread and then procrastinate on emptying the dishwasher, the less likely dirty dishes are to back up in my sink. Thus, I no longer find myself emptying the dishwasher only to immediately fill it up again.

It's a little thing, but it's improved the quality of my life or, at least, the cleanliness of my kitchen.

Now, I know those of you who have assigned spots for your nail clippers, an effective routine for dealing with junk mail, a schedule for running the self clean cycle on your oven, and the ability to consistently defrost your proteins in advance of needing them are thinking, "Oh, poor MEP, she's just now catching on. I've been sorting my cutlery for years!"

What else are you people doing? Please tell me.

Eat to Live . . . Live to Eat?

2009-05-13T20:02:00.021-05:00

Readers of this blog likely have noticed one of my defining contradictions: I love talking, reading, thinking about, and eating food. I also love talking, reading, and thinking about weight loss. It's true. I have many, many cookbooks--54 last time I counted--and also many diet books--around 20 (I have put them away in a box, but have not been able to let go of them). I enjoy reading recipes and enjoy reading articles and books on healthy lifestyles/weight loss, especially success stories.

Here are some recent television shows that have fueled my good intentions, if not always my good choices, with regard to eating and losing weight:

1. The Biggest Loser on NBC -- I am a longtime fan of the show. I was a little disappointed in last night's finale as I had been hoping to see Mike or Tara win. I have been holding a grudge again the winner, Helen, for strong-arming her daughter into going home before the daughter was ready. It's not that I think motherhood has to be exemplified by sacrifice, but I just feel like if your poor example is one of the reasons why your child might be overweight, then maybe you owe your child the best opportunity to get fit. That said, Helen worked really hard, and I was so impressed when she ran a marathon on last week's episode. As much as Ron got on my nerves throughout the season with his scheming, I cried real tears of happiness when he finished the marathon (after walking injured for almost 14 hours). I feel genuinely sad for the contestants who struggled to continue their weight loss efforts once they left the ranch. Yes, I get caught up in the reality show, backstabbing bullshit that goes on, but that's not why I tune in. I watch season after season because it is so exciting and powerful to witness people transforming their lives.

2. I Want to Save Your Life on We -- This show features Charles Stuart Platkin, a "diet detective" who works with overweight people for a week, giving them tips on eating right and exercising. He visits again several months later to see how their lives and bodies have changed. Platkin comes across as really kind and sincere and passionate without being frighteningly intense (in manner of Jillian Michaels, though I love her). On the last episode I saw, the diet detective worked with an overweight couple who had two small children. He filled a table with some of the stuff they were mindlessly eating throughout the day--mostly a bite here and a taste there of the stuff their kids didn't finish. All of those bites and tastes (including the leftover peanut butter on a knife) added up to 462 calories. I try to watch myself in this area, but I do eat my kids' scraps--waffles, nuggets, cheerios, yo-baby--sometimes and tend to assume that eating stuff I'm not really enjoying or thinking about does not really count.

3. Cook Yourself Thin on Lifetime -- This show features three slender women who know the secrets of "cooking yourself thin" and on each episode share them with a different woman who eats fattening stuff but would like to lose a dress size or two. The slender chefs (my title, not theirs) show the woman how to make healthier versions of some of her favorite foods. They leave her with a cookbook and a basket of goodies and check back in about six weeks. Same old story (though a good one) of how you (yes you!!!) can lose the fat and calories without losing flavor. At times the slender chefs come across as a bit patronizing. I don't, for example, think it's necessary to use air quotes when employing the word caramelize. I also get a little annoyed when they use the adjectives "right" and "wrong" to describe the women's food choices. The strange tag team cooking of the slender chefs, the contrived girlfriend vibe, and the overuse of "amazing" and "unbelievable" at the six week check-up all annoy me. And yet, for all this petty complaining, I am definitely a fan of the show. I think as the series continues, the slender chefs will get more comfortable and real on camera. Bottom line is that the food looks really delicious and flavorful, and many of the recipes are intriguing. I love seeing the women at the end when they have dropped a dress size (often two) by cooking themselves thin. I even think it would be fun to form a Cook Yourself Thin club to try some of them. As an added bonus for Top Chefanatics, one of the slender chefs is Candice, who was the culinary student cheftestant whom the deliciously arrogant sommelier Stephen mocked for her heart-shaped food presentation. I always remember how much I enjoyed it when Candice gave Stephen the what's what at the reunion show.

So, there you go, a recent history of my good intentions. I'm not ashamed that I am blogging about weight loss and contemplating a snack while my hubby is at the YMCA.** I feel fortunate to have plenty of food in my pantry and fridge and, more than that, fortunate to possess an abundance of passions, interests, and good intentions.

Food for thought? Please share in the comments.

*I was tempted to use the word "obsessions" but if I were obsessed with losing weight, I would have, you know, lost more weight. For the record though, it was a long time coming, but I have lost my baby weight and am now working on the ten or so pounds I gained before becoming pregnant with Little Bit.
**After all, if I were at the YMCA, no one would be here with our kids.

These are the days . . .

2009-05-10T21:00:00.005-05:00

Parents of young children are often warned, by parents of grown children, that time flies. I've heard "They grow up so fast" so many times, and I know that it is true, even though on some particularly long days, I have moments when I wish they could grow up a little faster. Years ago, before I had kids, I was talking to a friend's mother, who told me, "I wish I would have enjoyed my kids more." This woman is a great mom, and I'm sure she did enjoy her kids, but I imagine most parents of grown children still end up feeling some version of "I wish I would have enjoyed my kids more."

Here are some things I will miss when my boys are grown up and that I try not to take for granted now (NTB an understood for each):
* the joy I feel when they make each other laugh
* the way they touch and wrestle with each other, almost like playful puppies
* how sweet they look and smell after bathtime with their hair wet and brushed, their jammies on, and their skin smelling like baby lotion
* the way Little Bit looks these days as he experiments with finger foods -- bananas crusted in his hair and eyebrows, pants covered with morsels that did not make it into his mouth
* Bub's enthusiastic descriptions of what he and his imaginary friends are up to, his eagerness to go to school, his hopeful sense that all other kids are potential friends
* how darn cute Bub looks when he runs around the house in his big boy pants
* how often and how easily Little Bit smiles, the funny little hop/crawl thing he has going on right now, how proud he is when he climbs up on to his little chair (even though he does not know how to get down without hurting himself)
* the moments when Bub will tell me, unsolicited, "I love you, mommy."
* the fact that Little Bit loves me so much that he wants to be awake and hanging out with me almost all day and a couple of times at night too!
* the fact that Bub still likes to be rocked some nights before bed -- some nights I am tired and wanting bedtime to be over so I clean up, blog, watch television, or check facebook, but as I sit rocking him, I think, "Ten years from now, five years from now, maybe even one year from now, you will give anything to have this boy wanting you to rock him." Then, I squeeze him a little tighter.
* the moment when Little Bit finishes eating before bed and passes out on the boppy, looking so peaceful
* seeing Little Bit asleep on the video monitor with his little behind up in the air
* having a snack with Bub, often a soft pretzel, during Little Bit's morning nap -- "We can share it, mom!"
* the fact that I can dress them in matching outfits and neither complains
* the wet kisses Little Bit now gives
* the way Bub trots back from "storytime" at church with a huge smile on his face

This list could go on and on. There are hundreds more things I want to remember, and I hope I do remember them.

Mostly though, I want to remember to enjoy my kids.

What's the name of the game?

2009-05-04T20:58:00.010-05:00

This post is a mixed bag. I want to know some things and hope you can help me. I have a few things I want you to know.

Talking Points: What I Want To Know

1. Space bags. Those bags you fill with stuff you want to store, like clothes and comforters and stuff, and then suck all the air out of them . . . have you seen them? Have you used them? Would you recommend them?

2. How do you prepare turnips? Let me fast forward to the answer I want on this one. I want to know if I can just wash them, cut them in large pieces and roast them in the oven? Can I? Do tell.

3. How do I know what wattage my microwave is?

4. Do you truly consider 1/2 cup to be a legitimate serving size for ice cream?

5. Have you tried Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred? (question possibly related to question 4) 5a. Are you watching The Biggest Loser this season? 5b. If so, do you have a favorite? I've been thinking Mikey (though would have loved to see Kristen hang in there), but I am way over Ron.

6. What chocolate chip cookie recipe do you use? I've been trying a bunch this year but don't have a definitive winner yet (but no real losers either).

7. Should I Twitter or will it take over my life?

8. Do you know about Cake Wrecks? So, so funny. I learned about the Cake Wrecks blog from my friend E. . .

Talking Points: What I Want You To Know

1. Olive Kitteridge by Elizabeth Strout is fantastic. It's a novel told in stories, and I loved the characters and the way their stories, especially Olive's, unfolded. I'm not going to say much about it because it just won the Pulitzer Prize, which means there are plenty of people taking the time to write thoughtfully and eloquently about it.

2. You can download the "Hot Dog!" song on itunes. It's performed by They Might Be Giants, which I did not know until yesterday and makes me like the catchy tune all the more.

3. Bub's favorite song is not "Hot Dog!"--though he loves that one and Minnie Mouse--but "Boom Boom Pow" by Black-Eyed Peas, which he calls "Get, get, get." He told me at the park last week, "You're so two thousand and late."

4. There are two new healthy lifestyle/weight loss shows on right now. I've caught the first few episodes of I Want to Save Your Life on We and liked it. The show's "diet detective" seems like a really kind, positive good guy. I am DVR-ing Cook Yourself Thin on Lifetime. I'll let you know what I think about it.

5. The title of this post comes from an Abba song.

6. I am now declaring 30 Rock my favorite show. It's even funnier than The Office, though I still love The Office. Phyllis and Pam in matching purple gingham shirts, trendy sweaters and capri pants? Love is in the details.

7. I've never seen Star Wars and don't plan to, but I wish you all a Happy Star Wars Day!

8. If you order something from the Land's End catalog, you will begin receiving emails from Land's End on an almost daily basis. All the free shipping offers you need, baby.

Discuss amongst yourselves by leaving a comment. Pretty please.

YA . . . more than OKAY!

2009-04-30T15:24:00.007-05:00

I still have several books and authors I want to share with you and so the Book Beat beats on. The popularity of the Harry Potter books and, more recently, the Twilight series, has highlighted the fact that books written for younger audiences also have appeal for adult readers. As with books written for adults, YA books vary in style, quality of writing, and level of difficulty. For me, however, a compelling narrative is a compelling narrative, whether or not I am a particular book’s target reader. I get pretty frustrated/annoyed when people consider certain types of books beneath them. When I read, sure I hope to learn, to be inspired, to be transported, to appreciate the beauty of language and the nuances of a writer’s style, but most of all, I hope to enjoy the reading experience. If you enjoy the books you are reading, do not let anyone make you feel ashamed or foolish about what you read. Now down from soapbox, I present my next grouping of books you may want to check out:

Novels Written for Young Adults that Might Appeal to Readers of All Ages:
The Book Thief by Markus Zusak
I resisted this book, despite its awesome reviews, because I did not think I wanted to read another Holocaust narrative because, you know, they do not tend to end well even though they often highlight the best of human courage and resiliency alongside the worst human depravity. The Book Thief offers insight into the Holocaust from the perspective of a young German girl, reminding readers that not all Germans bought into Nazi thinking, even though party membership was widespread. The book is narrated by Death, which takes some getting used to, but is effective. What I love most about this book is the way it highlights the tremendous power of words, a truth that readers of all ages cannot be exposed to enough. Steal this book if you have to. I don’t think you’ll regret it.

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
This novel made me wish I was teaching ninth grade English, which is, trust me, quite rare. Set in the future, The Hunger Games is the perfect novel for helping one to reflect upon present realities, particularly reality television. LAP and I have discussed how people (ourselves included) these days are kind of “soft” and wondered if we could step up and survive without life’s luxuries if we had to do so. This book offers glimpses of life lived in survival mode. It would be a great book to teach in conjunction with Lord of the Flies or to replace Lord of the Flies with the story of a strong, smart, courageous young heroine. I was an itty bit disappointed with the ending, which clearly left the door open for a sequel (which I discovered will be available in September). I will forgive the ending, I guess, if the sequel delivers. I’m reading another YA book set in the future right now. It’s called Uglies by Scott Westerfeld. It provides some food for thought, particularly about the ugly/pretty distinction, but the romance portion is a bit clumsy and the points are made more obviously than necessary. Still, I’m enjoying it and may investigate its sequels, though not in a hurry.

I also want to mention two YA series that I read a few years ago, but want to endorse, though they are nothing like the books mentioned above. I loved the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants books by Ann Brashares. Please, please do not judge these books by the movies. I also get a huge kick out of the Georgia Nicolson books by Louise Rennison. In my mind, these British books are sort of a Bridget Jones for young teens and tweens. Freaking hilarious at times.

If you don’t trust my authority that YA books are worth checking out, perhaps you might trust Nick Hornby’s. He writes about quite a few YA titles in Shakespeare Wrote for Money, a collection of his reading columns for The Believer, and comments, “I see now that dismissing YA books because you’re not a young adult is a little bit like refusing to watch thrillers on the grounds that you’re not a policeman or a dangerous criminal, and as a consequence, I’ve discovered a previously ignored room at the back of the bookstore that’s filled with masterpieces I’ve never heard of . . . The world suddenly seems a larger place” (81-82). So there.

What about you? What are you reading? Any YA titles to recommend? When have you read outside your box and been pleasantly surprised?

Exactly what I didn’t know I wanted . . .

2009-04-27T23:04:00.010-05:00

What with no longer watching Bravo’s Real Housewives* franchise, doing a lot of fast forwarding through this season of Dancing with the Stars, getting Little Bit to bed at a reasonably early hour, continuing to clean my perpetually messy and disorganized house while listening to audiobooks, and completely finishing that old dissertation, ntb, I have found more time to read lately.

Aware that my Book Beat posts are sometimes boring, I try to think of creative ways to thematically group the books I would like to share with you all. At this point, I have enough groupings for one massive post on books or several "shorter" ones. Without further ado, I present the first grouping:

Books that combine personal experience, great anecdotes, relevant but non-boring research, humor, and plenty of fodder for discussion:

Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip--Confessions of a Cynical Waiter by Steven Dublanica aka The Waiter:
This book was a bargain audiobook ($4.95) that I purchased because I had seen the author make a brief appearance on Oprah and liked him. I was worried that the book would be all about waiters spitting in food and that it would bring back unpleasant memories of my days as a waitress at Friendly and then The Olive Garden (where, for the record, I never even considered spitting in someone's food). Though entitled Waiter Rant, The Waiter is more insightful and thoughtful than he is angry and ranting and more compassionate than cynical. Reading about how horrible some customers are will definitely make you want to be an even better diner and tipper. More than that though, this book will make you think about other topics: the social significance of restaurants and dining out, what constitutes meaningful work, workplace power struggles, and the public health implications of treating restaurant employees poorly (i.e., the fact that many work sick because they cannot afford to take a day off and can even be fired for missing a shift on a busy day). The fact that The Waiter is a former seminarian made things even more interesting to me. At the end, he offers tips for being a good customer, one of which is not to ask for extra lemons and sugar so that you can make your own lemonade. I cracked up when I heard that because that happened ALL THE TIME when I worked at the Olive Garden, and I used to marvel at the audacity of those customers.

Pregnant Pause: My Journey Through Obnoxious Questions, Baby Lust, Meddling Relatives, and Pre-Partum Depression by Carrie Friedman
Readers of this blog know how interested I am in trying to chronicle and negotiate the delights and challenges of parenthood. Because I am right in the thick of it right now—the poop in the tub, public meltdowns, imaginary friends, chicken nuggets, night feedings, stroller analysis, heart-melting surprises, messy surprises, sleep books, ear infections, and on and on—it is sometimes easy to forget that small children are not the center of everyone’s world. Friedman’s book is a humorous but also serious take on her own journey toward motherhood—is she ready, how will she know, and why won’t everyone just leave her alone about it in the meantime. For me, it was good to be reminded of how frightening, baffling, and sometimes obnoxious/obsessive that parenthood--especially of really young children--might appear to those who are still thinking about if and when they want to join the fray. Friedman is witty, edgy, and endearingly vulnerable as she describes her, to quote the title, "journey through obnoxious questions, baby lust, meddling relatives, and pre-partum depression." She is not quite sure she wants to press “play” at the end of Pregnant Pause (pretty sweet title, by the way) but I closed the book with a sense that if or when she does, she will be as ready as anyone can be.

Both Waiter Rant and Pregnant Pause would be good book club choices as they are accessible, engaging, and humorous while also lending themselves to discussions of "big" issues.

For now, writing a blog is enough for me, though someday I would like to write a book. I have absolutely no plans to write a novel and indeed cannot imagine a novel that would not be a thinly-veiled account of my life. Reading these books helped me to envision the kind of book that I could see myself writing: a book that combines personal experience, relevant but non-boring research, humor, and hopefully insight.** For now, I am happy living and enjoying my life and trying to have and learn from the kind of experiences others might want to read about, connect to, and laugh at, but when inspiration strikes, I will be ready.

*If you still watch, I’m not judging. I just had to cut myself off when I found myself feeling anxious and on edge during some episode, disgusted during others.

**a book like one previously reviewed on NTB: Helping Me, Help Myself by Beth Lisick, which I wish that I had written or thought of writing

Flat out confused . . .

2009-04-23T20:34:00.011-05:00

My personal struggles with fashion and style have been addressed on this blog before. I have complained that there is no female equivalent to "khakis and a golf shirt" and, more recently, fessed up to my tendency to dress in clothes that can double as pajamas.* My comfort zone is Gap and Old Navy t-shirts, paired with comfortable bottoms: athletic pants, jeans, capris, cargos, and sometimes khakis. I have many black t-shirts.

Now, I'm not claiming that I walk around town like a slob every day. Indeed, a baseline of cleanliness and grooming is essential to my mental health as I learned after spending eight months with Baby Bub, waiting until he "napped" to get ready.*** When my hubby is not traveling, we have a system in place that allows me to get dressed and ready, child free, before he leaves for work. I'm not going to be mistaken for US Weekly moms like Katie Holmes, Reese Witherspoon, or Angelina Jolie anytime soon, but I do put on makeup and deal with my hair pretty much every day. I thought with wearing makeup and dealing with my hair most days, I was doing pretty well for myself, ntb, but I have noticed that there are other women who do these things AND also put together attractive, flattering, cute outfits. It's not that I want to compete with or compare myself to these other moms so much as that I would like to feel more put together, in control, and pleased with myself, if that makes sense.

Of late, I've started thinking that I could improve upon my personal style a bit. I thought at one point of using NTB to challenge myself and others to forego elastic waist pants for an entire week, but I didn't know if I could actually do it or what the point would be. Then, I started thinking that the answer might be to acquire some cuter shirts, either fancier t-shirts or, gasp, some tops that are not t-shirts.

Since my birthday in March, I have acquired some new shirts that, while not high fashion items, are cute and comfortable and not black t-shirts. I want these new items to be part of my weekday wardrobe, but I keep hitting a brick--or, more accurately, a rubber--wall when I go to dress each morning. I put on the nice shirt. I put on my bottoms that zip/button. Then, I have a problem. For me, there is a logical, comfortable choice of footwear for my typical, weekday, GAP brands ensemble: "tennis shoes."** But I feel stupid wearing my new shirts with tennis shoes. It does not look right so I take off the nice shirt I was thinking of wearing and pull out a t-shirt or the lightweight black pullover I wear four days a week so I can keep my tennis shoes on.

I know what you're thinking, "Oh MEP, you need some flats or maybe some Privos." I have been thinking the same thing and even experimenting with some new footwear options, but I just need some clarification on a few items:

1. Am I correct that flats are not always comfortable? That they sometimes rub up against the back of your heel all day long? That they offer little support? That they are not ideal for heaving a double stroller around town?

2. I have figured out that you are not supposed to wear socks with most non-athletic, casual shoes of the sort I see other moms with cuter outfits wearing. I get that and luckily, my dad gave me some samples he had of Peds, these little footie type socks that hide nicely in casual footwear.

2a. But if you don't wear socks, don't your feet STINK by the end of the day? Or, is that just me?

3. I have also noticed that if I put on my jeans and then try to put on a pair of flats, my jeans begin grazing the floor and collecting dust and dirt around the hem. Is this just how it goes or do other people have multiple sets of jeans of varying lengths to accommodate different types of footwear? If that's what it takes, I don't know that I can go there.

If and when spring and eventually summer weather do arrive, things will get a bit easier. I do have a few comfortable pairs of flip flops and sandals I can add to the rotation. Plus, capri pants, though much maligned by fashion experts on television, do solve the problem of the grazing hems.

Until then, I want to up my weekday fashion game, but without much pain, stink, trouble, and expense. Is that possible?

*and I do not mean that I wear lingerie tops as actual tops like some seemingly fashionable people seem to do -- I mean that I wear sweatpants all day and then sleep in them

**by that I mean running shoes, though I do NOT run

***had he napped, that might have worked

I Heart Kings Island

2009-04-20T14:13:00.013-05:00

My love of rides, snacks, and people watching is stronger than my distaste for crowds and sweating and thus I have loved going to Kings Island since I was a little girl. I am so excited that Bub is now old enough to begin enjoying its delights. We were in Ohio for my niece's baptism this past weekend, giving Bub and I a chance to break in our season passes, ntb, on opening day.*

Since my visits to Kings Island in recent years have been in the capacity of "parent of a toddler," I have not even entered the non kiddie-land areas of the park in about eight years. That disclaimer out there, I still feel qualified to list my favorite aspects of Kings Island:

Favorite Rides (some of them may no longer exist):
- The Beast and The Beastie
- Backwards Racer
- The Scrambler
- Shake, Rattle, and Roll
- The Smurf Ride (breaks my heart that it is no longer around)

Highlights of Kings Island for MEP as a tween (though tweens as a demographic did not exist when I was one):
- Dressing in matching (usually fluorescent) outfits with my friends
- Wondering if I was driving the same Tin Lizzie the kids from the Brady Bunch did
- Wasting money making recordings and videos at the Soundtracks place
- Seeing concerts like NKOTB, Tiffany, and Debbie Gibson at the Timberwolf Ampitheater

Lowlights of Kings Island for MEP as a tween:
- Complicated logistics of drop-off/pick-up/meeting up in the pre-cellular age
- Running out of money before I had eaten all the snacks I wanted
- Once seeing my neighbor (probably 14 at the time) smoking a cigarette there**

Favorite Food Finds at Kings Island:
- Funnel cake with the fruit topping
- Soft serve ice cream with chocolate sprinkles
- LaRosa's pizza (tastes better at Kings Island)
- Soft pretzels
- Fountain Diet Coke

Perennial Fashion and People Watching Highlights:
- air-brushed t-shirts
- jean shorts
- muscle shirts
- cheapy flip-flops and delicate sandals (seriously, I will never understand who goes somewhere where they are going to be walking ALL DAY and wears the least comfortable shoes they can find?)
- PDA while waiting in lines (noticed in glimpsing the six hour Diamondback line on Saturday that new forms of PDA can include couples groping while also sharing their ipod earphones)
- containers of Skoal glimpsed in back pockets (often of jean shorts)
- kids on leashes

Bub has been to Kings Island three times so far. I bought the passes because his cousins Swiper and Fancy have them, and I wanted us to be able to go together when we visit Ohio during the months Kings Island is open and not have the pressure to "get our money's worth" out of inflated one-day admission prices. It is so fun to watch he and and his cousins begin their own love affair with the amusement park. His favorite things so far are the Bumper Cars, the Blue's Clue's ride, the other little cars, and blue icees.

I thought it might make me feel old to be at Kings Island as a parent. Even though I didn't get a chance to ride any "real rides" and couldn't linger over all my favorite snacks, I had just as much and maybe more fun sharing in Bub's excitement. Indeed, I felt pretty young. The only time my sense of youth was challenged was when I saw two individuals who appeared to be married and who I taught when they were FRESHMEN in high school at the park with children roughly the same age as my own.

I look forward to more fun at Kings Island this summer, especially when the water park opens. I'm also hoping that I get to visit the park without kids for a couple of hours sometime so I can pretend I'm thirteen. I'd like to ride all my favorites, wait for the Diamondback, and enjoy being able to spend more than ten dollars on snacks if I fancy it, ntb.

Kings Island lovers, please let me know if I overlooked some of your favorite things about KI. What about you? Did you have a favorite amusement park growing up? What were your favorite things about it? Please share.

*Little Bit still gets in for free.
**I was such a goody-goody that seeing this unnerved me for weeks

April is the cruellest month.

2009-04-13T15:48:00.007-05:00

April is the cruellest month.

Today is opening day at Wrigley Field and the weather is, as it was last year, rainy, cold, and miserable. On this day last year, I remember feeling practically toxic as I negotiated a Cubs traffic jam on the way to Bub's park district class. I felt pissed off and weighed down by the miserable weather. The only thing that made me feel better about things this time last year was my relief that I was not a Cubs fan who had been looking forward to the game. I will admit that I was in such a foul mood on this day last year that I felt annoyed by the fans and their willingness to go to a baseball game in crap weather and unreasonably resentful of the fact that so many of them drove to the game, causing mini traffic jams for me to contend with while they were at it.

I think I'm in a better place this year than I was last because in addition to feeling relieved that I was not going to the game, I actually felt sorry for the die hards I saw walking toward Wrigley with ponchos and umbrellas.

I'm not one to obsess about the weather. I don't watch the Weather Channel. Most days I don't even check the forecast. I don't spend an inordinate amount of time worrying that weather will foul up my plans (perhaps because I don't have that many "plans"). It's my thirty-fourth year of living in the Midwest, and I know that Spring does not magically appear on March 21st. Indeed, after eight years in Chicago, I know that there will likely be only glimpses of Spring--beautiful days here and there but nothing one can count on and build any more than a fragile sense of hope and optimism around--until all of sudden it will be June, hot and humid, and I'll be tempted to complain about how hot it is outside.

I love the Midwest and plan to live here always. I love how much one can appreciate beautiful weather, even for a day, after a LONG winter. I love seasons, even though spring seems to get skipped so often. My Midwestern heart suspects that if I were to ever move to a place with better, more consistent weather, even when hubby and I are retired, I will feel as if I am somehow "cheating."

But seriously, these cold and rainy spring days are so difficult. Even though I know I have much to be thankful for and much to be happy about, it is very difficult to make plans, count blessings, and look forward hopefully on days like today. I look outside and think, "Enough's enough."

I don't want this post to be a litany of complaints, though on this rainy Monday it is hard not to go there.

Instead, I will focus on a some of the things that are making me feel more hopeful and peaceful.

* Bub's commentary last night before bed, "The Easter bunny going to visit me and he say, 'Bub, you were a good boy on Easter,' and then he bring me more candy."

* Little Bit, though he is giving me fits with his sleeping and eating, learning to crawl for real now and being so stinking proud of himself -- also how he looks when he attacks a Gerber wagon wheel

* the fact that hubby is busy at work -- the boys and I miss him when he has a lot of work to do, but I am thankful that he loves his job and that it seems secure

* new (to me) song I heard on the awesome season of finale of Big Love that I purchased on itunes and have been listening to over and over: "I Found a Reason" by The Velvet Underground

* book I heard about because a character in another book referenced it and I forgot I had until this afternoon: The Enchanted April by Elizabeth Von Arnim -- I've only read a few pages so far but it features a woman who, on a crap February day, is tempted to book a holiday in Italy for April -- seems promising

* lovely visit with my in-laws this weekend and upcoming trip to the promised land (Ohio) this weekend for my niece's baptism

* thinking about Dwight and Andy singing John Denver on Thursday's The Office

* already knowing what we are having for dinner tonight

* text messages from my siblings and parents

* the fact that I mistakenly purchased Starburst jelly beans of the "tropical" variety instead of standard and that they are SO BAD, I will not be tempted to over-indulge and may just throw them out

* fountain Diet Coke from Burger King

Tell me, what things, big or small, are making you happy or hopeful on this April day, however "cruel" (or not) it is in your neck of the woods . . .

Investors Welcome

2009-04-08T21:12:00.013-05:00

Little Bit is cute as ever, generous with the smiles, loud as anything when he laughs, and so stinking proud of himself when he gets to do his walking laps (both hands up, holding those of adult hunched over to guide him).

But, of late, Little Bit has been a little bit more than we bargained for. Dare I say, there have been moments when we have been tempted to replace the "B" with an "sh," affectionately, of course. It's not his fault. He's on a second course of antibiotics for an ear infection that was diagnosed three weeks ago (on my birthday, ntb). The ear infection was coupled with lots of coughing and snot and the typical sleep and feeding issues that arise during illnesses. Blah, blah, blah. The long and the short of it is since the ear infection began he has been difficult to feed, napping like crap, waking up at least twice a night to be fed (after a decent multi-week run of one wake up), and, the past ten days or so, starting his (and thus our) day sometime in the 5:00 hour.

Not one to sit around moping and complaining,* ntb, I have instead decided to use my spare time to turn these challenging few weeks with Little Bit into an opportunity to help other frustrated families and become rich enough to feel as if I could buy Lean Cuisine pizzas even when they are not on sale.

Loyal readers, you have an opportunity to get in on the ground floor.

Obviously, what follows is not the business plan that I will be putting before the investors. I will leave the industry research and financial modeling to my hubby, who kicks ass at that kind of stuff, ntb. I am planning to secure the top legal mind in West Virginia (who will take my call, ntb) to help me to protect my intellectual property and/or secure the necessary patents and whatnot. LAP will be in charge of all accounting. PITA and my mom will be on the marketing team. Sales covered by my dad and brothers, one of whom already works in the infant products industry.

Invention Number One: "Tick Tock, Re-Set Your Baby's Clock"
This first project is very much still in the research stages. I'm not sure if the end result will be a product, a pharmaceutical, a homeopathic solution, or some sort of proven process/system that parents will be trained in by certified Tick Tock Trainers who will not wear company golf shirts and Dockers. Tick Tock is not intended for everyday use or as a safety net for lazy/irresponsible parents who disrespect their children's sleep need or parents who have unreasonable expectations for the amount of sleep they can expect from their baby. No, this product is for parents who work hard to keep their kids well rested, but cannot crack the early morning wake-up cycle. At Casa MEP, we don't ask for much, but we do ask for a wake-up in the 6:00 hour. 7:00 a.m. feels like 10:00 a.m. on the rare occasions when one or both of the boys sleeps past 7:00. A couple years back, we had a three or four month period with Bub waking up in the 5:00 hour, and I drove myself batty trying to crack it: reading sleep books, adjusting bedtimes, documenting naps, changing feeding times, etc. Eventually, that stage ended, but I couldn't say how or why. Tick Tock would save parents from the brutality of the 5-something wake-up and the insanity of trying to figure it out by offering either a product or process to allow a one-time re-set of the child's body clock to save everyone a lot of frustration and lost sleep.

Invention Number Two: "Tiny Trough"
Little Bit is not full-on crawling yet, but he has a speedy and somewhat stealthy army crawl. He is at a stage where he wants to put anything he finds in his mouth. I am very vigilant and keep Bub's favorite treasures--coins, candy, broken crayons, miniature alphabet magnets--far out of Little Bit's reach (and Bub's too, when I can manage it). I also sweep and vacuum regularly enough to keep the biggest hunks of junk off the floor. And yet, Little Bit continues to spot prey and move in for the kill. This morning he quickly slithered about seven feet because he spotted a small green morsel of dried play-doh he wanted to sample. I've already mentioned how he gets tired of Puffs and tosses them on the floor. If, however, he finds a puff on the floor, he is suddenly all about ingesting it with enthusiasm, ditto any other scrap or crumb of food he can get his little hands on. Hubby has taken to calling Little Bit "the scavenger." Despite his apparent hunger, meal times are not going well. Many days he balks at baby food, but he's very unpredictable with the new table foods. Loves bananas one day, shoves them off the tray the next. He was really into the first five pieces of avocado I gave him and then wanted nothing to do it. Ditto pasta pickups. Ditto pears. Ditto Gerber vegetable crackers. The only slam dunk of the new self-feeding transition we're trying to ease into has been the cheese puffs (they are organic, but I'm not going to kid myself that they ought to be an essential part of any kid's diet).

Bub's food issue has always been a resistance to trying new things (outside the categories of candy and crackers). Little Bit seems willing to sample anything he finds on the floor . . . that's where the Tiny Trough comes in!!! I haven't drawn up the plans yet, but picture a size-adjustable piece of sanitary, easy-to-clean, BPA-free, and possibly customized-to-match-your-flooring hard plastic with molds of bowls, crevices, and other small hiding places on top. Just toss those cubes of avocado, those peas, that tofu--whatever healthy food you want your kid to try--onto the Tiny Trough when the child is not paying attention. Then, put him/her on the ground and let him/her crawl over, happen upon the Tiny Trough, and being eating and exploring with glee. To encourage eating, you may pull child away from the Tiny Trough a couple of times to ensure that he/she will remain enthusiastic about getting back to it right away.

I think it goes without saying that you're going to need to act quickly if you want to be a part of these unique opportunities. Let me know how much you're in for . . .

*and just kidding, I can mope and complain with the best of them, though I am getting better about staying positive

Grains on the Brain

2009-04-06T21:13:00.006-05:00

Loyal readers know that I have used NTB to document my culinary interests, obsessions, and experiments. For awhile, I was working on soup and then moved on to salad recipes. I know that my cooking posts tend to be on the boring side, but sharing them with you makes me feel more motivated to try new things in the kitchen.

So, the new culinary goal is to start incorporating more whole grains into the diet at Casa MEP. Whole grains under consideration include:
Amaranth
Barley
Brown rice
Bulgur (cracked wheat)
Whole-wheat couscous
Flaxseed
Millet
Oats
Quinoa
Rye
Spelt
Wheat berries
Wild rice

This list is a product of a quickie google search, not extensive research. The only whole grains on the list I've prepared before are brown rice, oats, and couscous. Others I have eaten, but not worked with in my kitchen.

One recipe I want to attempt for sure is Wheatberry Waldorf Salad. I purchased a miniscule amount at Whole Foods once (eight bites for $4 or something ridiculous like that) and enjoyed it.

So, you tell me, what do you do with whole grains? I would welcome recipes or links to recipes. I am especially fond of cold salads, foods with lots of texture, and recipes that don't require lots of ingredients. I would tell you how to link to recipes when leaving comments, but I don't know myself.

What's cooking in your kitchen?

Appetite(s) for Destruction

2009-04-02T14:32:00.011-05:00

Appetite for Destruction: Little Bit Wants to Bite

Bub loved baby food, and I mean loved it. Loved it so much that, as I've mentioned many times on this blog, he still ate baby food peas and sweet potatoes until a few months ago and, when our babysitter is here, continues to eat them (he accepts them from her, but not from me, not that I've still been pushing them). Little Bit eats his baby food just fine, but I can tell (or at least I think I can) that he really wants food that he can pick up and eat on his own. I am a little nervous about this. Bub was spoon-feeding himself baby food before he ever wanted to feed himself much table food. Little Bit, perhaps because he sees Bub eating "real" food next to him whereas Bub just saw me wide-eyed and holding a spoon, looks at that food with longing. Even though he has six, huge teeth and a pretty good pincer (?) grasp, I have been waiting until his next check-up to ask about moving forward with more foods. For now, the only things I feel safe letting him eat are little, itty, bitty pieces of banana that I pre-mush a bit for him, and puffs. When I pour a little pile of puffs on to his tray or on the exersaucer while he's "exercising," he gets super excited at first. Then, pretty soon, he realizes, "Oh, these again. Not what I was hoping for." He eats some of the puffs and others inevitably end up on the floor where they are accidentally stepped upon by me or intentionally pulverized by Bub.

Appetite for Destruction II: Tornado Bub

I'm not a neatnik, never have been. I do like things neat and tidy, but I seldom manage to keep them that way for very long. Daily, I attempt to straighten our place up as best as I can, just trying to achieve a baseline semblance of order that keeps me feeling somewhat in control. Since Bub and Little Bit are typically only asleep at the same time for about twenty minutes a day, nothing is ever too tidy during the day. But even if they slept for two hours, I know that with Tornado Bub in town, I could spend all of nap time picking up and nothing would stay orderly for more than ten minutes or even ten seconds. Honestly, he has an appetite for destruction. It's like if he sees that I've straightened the pillows on the couch, he feels compelled to go over and toss one of them on to the floor. If he notices that I'm sweeping, he has to grab his little broom and "help" and by "help" I mean go directly to the pile of crumbs I've gathered and scatter them with his broom. If I am foolish enough to leave a pile of folded laundry in his reach, it does not stay folded for long. If I ask him to get me a "Little Bit diaper," he often gives me half the bin. Bub does have to clean up after making these messes. When I have the energy, it's immediately. More often than not, it's after Little Bit is in bed. Then, we "work together" to put all the crayons back in the tin, all the Megablocks back in the bin, or all the shoes back under the shelf where we keep his footwear. I'm not concerned about him being unhelpful or incapable of picking up, I am concerned about his seemingly physical need to bring disorder to order. I hope it's just a stage.

Do any of you have a tornado in your home? Any tips? What about ideas for what to feed Little Bit? Just please, don't tell me avocado. I know it's mushy and he might like it, but I don't like thinking about all the avocados that will go brown in my fridge so I can use enough of one to satisfy the Bit. Despite their healthy fat status and my love for them, I don't want to see myself eating an avocado a day before it goes bad.

What now?

2009-03-30T21:08:00.013-05:00

Today I submitted the final copies of my dissertation. NTB. I finished the "thinking work" a few months ago and the margin and font and page number and "thank God my hubby had a second major in computer applications" formatting work back in February. In March, I filled out the necessary surveys for the school and government. I visited campus to drop off and another day to pick up the forms I needed signed. I visited the post office to send those same forms for additional signatures and breathed a sigh of relief when they arrived back in my mailbox. I ordered bound copies of my project. I wrote a check to apply for a copyright. I asked my husband to print out two more copies of the darn thing. I drove downtown after lunch today, and he passed the last of these through the car window so I could drive to campus and drop the whole thing off to a friendly, sweet, young blond woman who confirmed that I had everything I needed.

When I checked my email a couple of hours later, I had received official word that my final copy submission was accepted. NTB.

Then, I sent an email asking a question about the commencement ceremony. I found a ribbon and a ruler and measured my head. I placed an order to rent the fancy outfit for the ceremony.

And then, I thought, "What now?"

And then I remembered that I bought a book, recommended by my friend E... when she guest posted here on NTB, called What now? by Ann Patchett.* So I read it. And loved it.

I'm not exactly sure what my answer is to "What now?" The plan for now is to try to teach a class or two in the Fall and go from there. I know I like to read, write, and learn about people's lives and stories.

Patchett's book reminded me to enjoy and appreciate this time, to remain open to possibility, and to just, well, pay attention. I am hoping that the answer to "What now?" will delight and surprise me.

Here's a passage from What now? that I will be reflecting on in the weeks and months to come:

"The secret is finding the balance between going out to get what you want and being open to the thing that actually winds up coming your way. What now is not just a panic-stricken question tossed out into a dark unknown. What now can also be our joy. It is a declaration of possibility, of promise, of chance. It acknowledges that our future is open . . . There's a time in our lives when we all crave the answers. It seems terrifying not to know what's coming next. But there is another time, a better time, when we see our lives as a series of choices . . . It's up to you to choose a life that will keep expanding."

What now? Good question. I'm going to try to enjoy figuring out the answer.

*Ann Patchett rocks. Bel Canto is one of the most beautiful novels I've read. I also recently listened to the audio version of Run. Patchett also wrote an kick-ass essay in The Wall Street Journal a few months ago about the triumph of reading these days.

But what do you really think?

2009-03-27T21:41:00.005-05:00

Bub, after a lunch outing with friends in which his behavior could have been better (though, it could have been way worse too) when I asked how he thought he acted: "I act a little bit crazy."

Bub, looking into my parents' garage: "There's too much stuff in here."*

Bub, after picking his nose and wiping it in my hair: "I gave it to you. It was a good one."

Bub, responding to question of what he liked best at his lunch with the Easter Bunny: "When we read a book." My heart warmed, but then Bub revised his answer about ten seconds later, "My favorite part was the candy. I love candy."

Bub, poking me in the belly: "Your belly is squishy."

What are the kids in your life saying these days?

*want to stress that the junk is not my parents so much as their lazy, move-a-lot children's