Daily Petitions

Weather and Withering

2009-02-11T18:06:00.002-05:00

What a fabulous day! Temperatures in the mid to high 60's, good friends to visit, accident report FINALLY done, and some sock knitting by me and the Clogger all made for a wonderful Wednesday experience at our house.

I have been trying to stay on top of the housework around here a little better. The kitchen and living room are definitely in better shape and are both receiving regular attention. However, the dining room is a huge sucking hole of crap stacked on crap. I'm not sure what my issue is, other than I need more storage space. Sure, lots of it does not belong there. In fact, most of it does not belong there. But as long as dining room houses the sewing machine(s), all of the "current sewing projects" have to stay in there, too... right? And some extra yarn currently resides on the table, along with a couple of abandoned projects, but really, no room in this house is immune to yarn/knitting. The extra homeschool books/projects/papers just don't fit on the shelf I designated for them. Partly because that shelf also works quite well for the music/church items, and is now overloaded. And I have a hard time going through and putting things away when there's no space to put them away TO.

It's clear, I have issues.

The Taxman, The Clerk, and The Clogger

2009-02-10T08:34:00.004-05:00

Without a police report my insurance company cannot process the claim for my accident and we are responsible for the $500 deductible necessary to pick up our fixed car. The best I can hope for at this point is that the shop takes much longer than they anticipated with the repairs.
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And in other news, the Clogger did her 4-H presentation last night. Oh, sure, she was nervous, but like I told her afterward, being brave doesn't mean you're not scared or nervous. Being brave means you do the thing in spite of being scared.
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I slipped on the ice in our driveway last night, pulling a sweet Charlie Brown-kicking-the-missing-football move, feet flying up in front of me, and landing smack on my rear. You would think that all the padding I'm carrying back there would have protected me a bit more.
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The pressure is on to get the taxes done. I loathe the paperwork and number crunching necessary, but feel such relief when it gets done... I hate myself for procrastinating, but can't seem to get going on it. Every year is like this. You'd think I'd learn.

They Don't Call It HOT For Nothing

2009-02-05T15:34:00.004-05:00

My Grandmother can sew a quilt, make a pound of ground meat feed 9 people and still have leftovers, crochet a bed doll, manage a tax system for any company, completely reupholster an RV, and run a county extension office. She is fairly accomplished at running her computer and loves to communicate electronically with everyone she knows. She can't, however, figure out how to run hotmail.

She's also got a wicked sense of humor. We had this conversation today when she called me for the third time, trying to open her email.

G: So I want to click on what?

Me: Inbox

G: Wait a minute, I've got a window that won't give me my finger.

Me: ???

G: There's some commercial popping up and it won't let me use my clicker.

Me: Close that in the bottom tray, and go back to the Inbox.

G: Hold on, I'm still waiting for it to give me the finger.

Me: Gram, I'm trying to be good here. Help a girl out, would you?

I sure do love that woman!

Confusion Trumps

2009-02-04T17:35:00.003-05:00

So it turns out it takes up to 5 days (or more) to have an accident report available to be picked up. Gee, who knew?

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I'm reading And She Was for my own personal enjoyment and Island of the Blue Dolphins as a read-aloud for The Clogger and find myself daydreaming about the characters of one book engaging in the activities of the other book. It's odd.

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I'm no Alton Brown, but I do know my way around a kitchen. Why does my spouse insist that Shake N Bake chicken is a fabulous meal, and request it with alarming frequency and fervor? And in a related note, why is my family shocked that I have a home made version that is AWESOME? Barefoot Contessa's got nothing on me. Well, maybe those great custom made shirts. I'd like some of those to drape gracefully over my curvy self.

Upspeak

2009-02-03T18:09:00.003-05:00

So far the service has been lovely from our insurance company, the rental car place, and the body shop. It's been super easy, dropping the car off, picking up the rental, and simply signing here, initialing here, and here are your keys, thanks!

Tomorrow I pick up the police report and fax it to my insurance agent. Then the race is on to see what finishes first: the car repairs or the claim. I really don't want to pay the deductible AT ALL, even if it will be reimbursed.

The latest phrase around here is "What does that mean?", usually used in response to some attempt at a double entendre or innuendo. For example, watching Ice Princess today the character who is in love with the lead drives out to her pond in his Zamboni, and I said "oh, he's going to Zamboni her ice!" and The Earner just looked at me (the phrase was implied). And then Teddy asks her, "Medium smooth, or Glassy?" and we lost it. What does that mean, indeed!

Because that's the kind of couple we are.

Wave of Death

2009-02-02T12:01:00.007-05:00

Progressive cautioned me to not talk about it with anyone other than my claim agent so of course I'm posting about the spectacular crash!

Yesterday on the way to clogging I T-boned some poor kid who made the unfortunate decision to make a left hand turn without looking into oncoming traffic.

Please note this drawing, which is not to scale:

The good news is it was totally NOT MY FAULT. The bad news is both our cars are damaged. Tomorrow morning I drop off our poor Grand Prix and pick up a rental. Stayed tuned for the next installment of "Will the Claim Go Through Before We Have to Pay Out the $500 Deductible?", but in the mean time, feel free to enjoy "How Much Do I Need Drink Before I Don't See the Crash In My Head?"

I can't imagine the damage if I had been going faster than 35, or if he had a passenger. Gah!

The claim agent was funny, she asked "So he just turned in front of you? what did he say?" and I said "He said someone in the left turn lane stopped for him, and he didn't think to look into the OTHER oncoming lane" and she said "That's why they call it the Wave of Death."

No kidding.

Flotsam and Jetsam

2009-01-31T10:17:00.002-05:00

'Zilla is at it again. She's micromanaging her 3 year old, manipulating our mother, and in general being quite possibly the crankiest person on the face of the earth. Of course she currently has the great excuse of pregnancy hormones, but we all know that this is her default personality and giving birth offers no relief from her particular brand of insanity.

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I've been thinking of tinkering with the layout/design of this place, but that seems like window dressing that is unnecessary. I mean, if the content is not worth it, why bother? If any of my three current readers think it'd be good to update something, could they please comment or email?

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Have you ever had a friend that you love, and want to get together with, and enjoy the company of, but you can not stand some of her parenting skills? What do you do?

And what do you do if you have a friend that you love and want to hang out with, but your child and her child are like oil and water and can not get together without much angst and turmoil?

Stagnant

2009-01-30T12:47:00.002-05:00

Same ol', same ol', trying to stealth blog with The Earner's wacky schedule leaves me twitchy and nervous. It's not such a big deal if he knows, and yet I'm still secretive when he's home. Is it in my nature?

I'm laughing my butt off over this:

Taco Town Commercial

which is not new, but B linked me, and all three of us in my household are cracking up over it today.

Also, I think I found my new mantra: Why not? The country's in the crapper, anyway!

I've been spending way too much time on Ravelry and knitting blogs, and am itching to buy yarn! start projects! achieving gauge on interesting stitch repeats! attempt altering patterns!

But I am resisting. I have the feeling that I messed something up on the fair isle sweater I'm 98% done with for the kid, and I really need to figure out what it is and fix it. Plus I have a hoodie done for my niece that needs buttons and to be mailed, I've got a scarf for a needy friend half done, and of course the never-ending afghan I thought would be a good idea to knit with a dk weight yarn. (note to self: it's never a good idea to start a LARGE project with thin yarn and relatively small needles. It. Will. Not. Move.)

Does It Remove Disdain?

2009-01-29T10:13:00.002-05:00

Turns out Magic Eraser will get the ink off the dryer drum, but it will require a back breaking posture, intense pressure while scrubbing, and create a high pitched squeaking noise that reverberates around the inside of the dryer (and your head) for hours.

I've done about a quarter of the dryer.

Baz says my other option is to dry a few loads of towels in it and bake the ink on real good, and then not worry about it.

Have I mentioned it was not me who put the ink pen in the dryer?

There should be a rule that if you're interpreting a amigurumi crochet pattern for an 11 year old (out of the kindness of your heart) the cranky child should not be yelling at you when she doesn't understand, and shouldn't blame you for the discrepancies in the pattern. Really, could we have that rule?

My Living Room Hates Me

2009-01-28T11:26:00.003-05:00

Google tells me that ink can be removed from the dryer drum with a Magic Eraser.

We'll see about that.

Today I will be arranging the furniture back into it's pre-holiday formation. I'm tired of kicking the coffee table every time I need to get back into the corner to turn on a lamp, and the empty gaping hole in front of the fireplace-less mantle is staring at me, taunting me, just waiting for the chair that sits to the side of it. I think my living room hates me. Evidence of this: total of 3 outlets in the room, 2 of them placed in the most inconvenient places ever. The only thing one of them is good for is plugging in the vacuum, and even then it's iffy, ever since The Earner zapped the outlet with the mis-wired plug of the old vacuum. Don't let the scorch mark deter you from plugging in the cell phones to charge, though.

Every lamp in the room is strung with extension cords all leading back to the one outlet that is not in the middle of a traffic area (trust me, we're not walking around the perimeter of the room, it's hard to explain but the outlet is just in a really BAD place), and I'm constantly on high alert for cord management issues. Draping a lap blanket over the arm of the couch isn't met with "watch the cord!" at other homes, is it? Does vacuuming the carpet involve 3 handlers and a supervisor in other houses? Because lifting the extensions, watching the connections, managing the legs of furniture, balancing the weight of the cords with the shakiness of the table the lamp is not an easy job and might explain the current state of the floor in this room.

I think I just figured out a career for myself. Much like SNL's "Good Excuses" skit, I could provide a service whereby people could call me for excuses as to why they can't do housework. I would be awesome at this, and no situation would go without blame placed somewhere other than on the slovenly person.

Surely there's a market for this?

Behave, Or You Get a View of Road Kill

2009-01-27T10:40:00.004-05:00

The price of oil is down from last year at this time, which is great! We still use far too much of it heating this monstrosity of an old house with cracks, drafts and missing chunks of window trim, but that might not be a terrible thing, because the fresh air apparently helps the rest of the family not catch my deadly strain of strep throat. Yes, the mutant strain of strep that shredded my tender tissues and caused deep wounds that still have not healed after a week on antibiotics (which are shredding other areas... like my poor stomach). Anyway, my point is that while one should not see the curtains blowing in the breeze when the windows are closed up for the season, sitting on the couch in a sweatshirt and a sweater with a couple of blankets tucked around you is not a horrible way to spend the evening. It's kind of like hiking on a crisp winter day, enjoying the cool fresh air and breathing deeply that tingle of cold that bites at your lungs... but without the exercise and the pesky snow boots to deal with. So it's healthy, right?

So some things have changed for me in the past 6 months, the most notable one being that things are fixed in the marital department. They were broken for a while, which tends to suck the very life out of a person, and while I think no marriage is without trials and above requiring efforts, things are definitely on the mend here and much better than they were. In a related note, I did not have the Mystery Lingering Illness last fall/this winter. Sex truly IS the best medicine! Well, that and a bit less anxiety and stress, I suppose.

B and I were discussing the train wreck that is Jon and Kate Plus 8 this morning (why is my kid so obsessed with this wretched show?), and then the conversation took this turn:

ME: and I can't stand a man who takes that shit from his wife

B: I know. I don't blame him for showing the kids dead mice and horse poop, he has to get back at her somehow

which makes perfect sense to me.

That Overwhelmed Feeling?

2008-08-02T10:18:00.003-05:00

You know, the one you experience when you realize you've put things off far too long and now you HAVE to finish them the same week you've got babysit kids for 352 hours and many of those hours coincide with the times you've foolishly volunteered* to sit at the fair booth for clogging and the weather sucks because the humidity will not drop below 70%, which makes you cranky and puffy, and you sweat while washing dishes and require a shower after doing laundry, which creates more laundry, negating the whole process, and it doesn't matter what you do, the house is always a wreck and VBS starts next week and you have to make ANOTHER run to walmart because you forgot the fleece fabric you need to send for the mission project and as a teacher you should be doing a practice one of each of the crafts planned for the week so you don't look like a bumbling fool in front of the 4th graders when you want them to glue what? where? and it's supposed to look like...??? and instead you knit like a fiend because it soothes you and you've read umpteen books while avoiding real life and now 2 costumes have home with you from clogging because the word is out you can sew and they've asked you to re-do their old costumes to make them fit better and oh, yeah, can you have them done by Sunday? That'd be this Sunday when they clog for the State Fair, and have I mentioned you are feeling overscheduled? Now get more stuff in the mail and don't forget that the car STILL needs work and you need to get an estimate on that.

I have that feeling.

*Again with the volunteering.

Notes to Self

2008-07-29T15:20:00.004-05:00

If you're doing a low-carb food plan (I can't be the only one who despises the word diet) and go away for the weekend with friends, don't sabotage yourself with "treats" because "you deserve them" and then wonder why your feet are puffy and your stomach is all kinds of messed up and oh, yeah... your skin sucks, too!

If a typically sugary or sweet food is marketed as "low carb" maybe you should check the ingredients for sugar substitutes (especially those that cause diarrhea) before eating the entire container. Just sayin', is all.

If you're already feeling overwhelmed and doing a poor job at the things you have on your plate, do NOT volunteer for more.

If you do not intend to volunteer, apparently you also must avoid eye contact with the person asking for help, sit on your hands to avoid raising them, and it wouldn't hurt to just leave the room altogether.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho

2008-07-24T21:17:00.002-05:00

It's off to Albany I go! I am looking forward to my weekend away, with a great group of women I've known for 10 years now.

Extensive plans have been made, intricate pick up/drop off times orchestrated, a ton of food made and packaged, and everything packed... and that's just for the two I'll be leaving home for the weekend.

I'm jumping in the car, driving to a friend's house, and piling into a van with 4 other dried up LLL Leaders and heading north, no worries at all!

It's Not Like It's On Wheels

2008-07-24T07:58:00.002-05:00

When the tiny foam rocket the 3 year old baby-sit boy was launching disappeared behind the sofa his demeaner was that of a man who'd lost his last hope in life. Slumped shoulders, dragging feet, pouty lips sadly proclaiming "now it's gone forever" leaves me wondering if he knows me and my (filthy) ways too well, or if Behind the Couch is a similar wasteland in HIS house.

I choose the latter.

Ring, Ring, Ring, Bananaphone

2008-06-26T06:24:00.004-05:00

So that ticket I received for talking on the cell phone? The one I finally told The Earner about? $130.

Because I was starting to feel cocky with my little wad of babysitting money and my yarn plans and travel plans and all. That'll take me down a notch. The nerve! having extra money just sitting around.

So I am chastised and haven't used the phone while driving since then. I have pulled over to make a quick call. I have used the phone while sitting in parking lots before driving away, and I have instructed the 10 year old "take this phone, dial so-and-so, and tell them..."
She follows along remarkably well. I think she could have a career ahead of her in the secretarial arts.

A friend of mine has a 2 year old who is coming up allergic to eggs and peanuts and tree nuts. I'm happy to be of assistance, sharing recipes, shortcuts, and safe brands, but she has a situation I don't: older children. Two older children who have had their favorite foods (namely granola bars) for years, and all of a sudden these foods are not allowed in the house. I suggested making them from scratch, but it's just not the same. In some ways I think we are lucky that the Clogger is an only child, due to the accommodations we make. It's hard enough as adults sometimes to not have stuff around, or eliminate major food groups from your diet (dairy, how I miss you!), but for a 4 and 7 year old who've been eating favorite things they're entire young life? and then to suddenly hear that you can no longer have french toast or Honey Nut Cheerios? That's gotta suck.

It never sucks as much as having someone you love sick or constantly in danger of anaphylaxis, though. So it all evens out.

ps. Blogger spellcheck wants "anaphylaxis" to be "influx's", which I find mildly insulting and yet oddly amusing. The other choice is "analogises". wtf?

It's Never Enough

2008-06-23T17:51:00.002-05:00

Wow, I guess it has been a while. Much has happened around here, although not much of it terribly interesting. We had the Big Week at the church, getting ready for the mammoth involvement in Town Sale Day in my little borough. Spent the actual Town Sale Day hot and sticky, manning the frozen lemonade machine for the youth ministry fundraiser. I actually skipped out on knitting that afternoon, even though I had plans to make it, simply because I was too hot. A lovely nap in air conditioning and I was ready to take The Earner out for a Father's Day Dinner.

The following day was Father's Day and our annual church picnic in the park. Due to a special anniversary at the parish, we dressed up the picnic with a luau theme and Mass in the park, which was all quite fun. I did the regular 9am Mass at the church, then hustled up to the park to set up and do the music for the park Mass, then spent all day stuffing my face and having fun. I did go off my food plan, purposefully. I knew there would be delicious foods there that I love, and wanted to see if I would feel any different after having NO SUGAR or CARBS for two weeks at that point.

Turns out they bother my stomach. Who knew? I'm more than 3 weeks into this now, and am seeing and feeling some results that are quite nice. I feel motivated.

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I am nearly finished with my clapotis. I carefully calculated how much yarn I would need for the ending pattern, and happily knitted along the main body until I had that much yarn, plus a little extra, remaining. Then I started on the end pattern with my one remaining skein.

I ran out. (anyone NOT see where this was going?) I found more on Ebay. I did not realize that when I got it on sale, it was a terrific sale, at a quarter of the original price. Sticker shock, anyone? It will be finished this week, and then I just need to figure out how to weave in those silly ends. They're not cooperating.

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I have pain. Not the physical kind, but the pain of losing a son, rolled in with the pain of our family size staying at one living child. It's not every day any more, and it's no where near as crippling as it used to be, but it's there. I have learned that it's best to let it come on in waves. Let it wash over me and drag me down to the sandy bottom, where I will scrape my knees on the rocks as I bounce back up to the surface. The scraped knees and scars remain in the days and weeks after a Sad Day, reminding me of who I am. I am the mother of twins. I am infertile.
I am ok.

Bats in my Belfry

2008-06-12T16:46:00.003-05:00

The house we live in is quite old. At least 150 years old, according to some photos and documents, but the deed doesn't have a date on it, so we're not sure exactly how old. It's old enough to have neat things like square nails in the giant beams in the basement, an old dry sink made into a side board, a second set of (narrow) stairs in the back of the kitchen that are far more worn than the front (larger) stairs, and an unused chimney with bats living in it.

Well, to be truthful, the bats are living in the tiny space in between the bricks of the chimney and the wall of the house surrounding the chimney. They are quite respectful in that they're quiet in the morning when we're trying to sleep, their poop and other effluvia are contained by the walls they live in, and they are all out when we're trying to fall asleep at night.

However... once in a while a young one will get lost and find a way (where? where the HELL do they come through?) into the attic, and make it's way into our living spaces. I think this is kind of interesting. My husband does not find this interesting. He is afraid of bats. I find THIS interesting.

Nothing is funnier to me than a grown man who's not afraid to stick his fingers into huge machines with blades and roller bars, or stand right in front of 90 mile-an-hour fast balls cowering at the little flappity-flap sound of bat wings. I will march right in to the path of the bat, closing doors, opening windows, turning off ceiling fans (they confuse the poor things) and holler "he's coming your way, open the door and let him out!" only to follow the bat to the exit and find The Earner flat on the ground protecting his head while the bat flutters harmlessly around the top of the room, 9 feet above him, still trapped in the room.

If there is bat catching to be done, it's by me. If there is bat herding to be done, it's by me. If there is hysterical laughing at weenies who run, it's by me. But I kind of like knowing that they're there. They eat a lot of bugs.

And not funny at all, but Omaha NE was hit hard last night by storms and tornadoes. Brandy mentions more details, and also their break in from last night. I'm thinking of those poor boys today, and their families.

No Bunny Left Behind

2008-06-09T16:51:00.003-05:00

Both bunnies have been surgically relieved of their reproductive organs. This was a must for the animals in my daughter's care, as she desperately wanted them to be friends and I just couldn't see myself being able to keep up with bunny contraceptives OR zillions of baby bunnies. It's also supposed to be very helpful in keeping the girl bunny healthy and free of mysterious bunny cancers, as well as keep the male from pooping every where and biting so much.

So we got them fixed. The boy breezed through it, coming home and eating hay 2 short hours after his neutering. Typical male.

The female suffered a bit, especially because the vet's office gave her to us STILL SEDATED, and then hosed her off immediately before putting her in the bunny carrier, so that she was dripping wet during the most crucial part of her recovery. Poor girl took 12 hours to dry off, and another 5 days to act alive.

Anyway, we waited the 2 weeks recommended for full recovery before introducing the two, and it's been met with mixed results. At times during their still-brief visits they sit contentedly, side by side, grooming or happily flopped. But most of the time he's chasing her, trying to hold on to her backside with his teeth, taking out a chunk of fur, and trying to mount her. She responds by running away a couple of feet and/or hissing at him. He is relentless. He circles around, acting nonchalant and suave, then runs up behind her and tries her again. Typical male.

The other day the Clogger was concerned because he was mounting her FACE, and she was just sitting there, letting him. Clogger picked the poor female up after her degrading victimization and exclaimed "awww, her face is all wet!"

Typical male.

Confession Time

2008-06-07T06:52:00.002-05:00

I started the Atkins Diet a week ago.

I don't want to go to my sil's house for a birthday party today.

I have dirty pans hidden in my oven.

I take a 20 minute "power nap" almost every day.

I got a ticket for talking on my cell phone while driving 3 weeks ago, and haven't told my dh yet.

I play games on my daughter's webkinz account.

You Said What?

2008-06-03T06:33:00.002-05:00

The humans in our house often speak for the rabbits of the house. This is highly entertaining for us, and we appear to have a gift for it.

Yesterday the Clogger and I straightened up the newly-boatless (yay!) back yard and moved the two rabbit hutches around, moved Muppy into her new hutch, and took the new guy outside. We were very excited to do this because he's a pain in the butt. He kicks litter out of his cage, he flings poo balls, he makes noise constantly, and let's face it: I was NEVER one for animals in the house. In my mind they were meant to live outside. That's why they're wearing fur coats. Anyway, the time was NOW to take him outside, as he was previously a house bunny, and he needs to prepare himself for the changing season during the currently mild weather.

So this morning I come downstairs and lean out the kitchen window in the early morning coolness to say hi to them, and then speak for them.

Me, as the voice of Skeezit: Geez, it's a little chilly out here, don't you think?

The Earner, as the voice of the seasoned Muppy: This is nothing. Just wait 'til January when it's really cold, n00b.

You Want What?

2008-05-26T09:38:00.002-05:00

The Earner is in the process of buying new sunglasses. We're so different in so many ways, but this really highlights the gap in philosophy between us. When I need sunglasses I go to Target and buy $10 shades that fit and are somewhat attractive. They block the sun, end of story.

When the Earner needs new sunglasses he pours over catalogs, searches on line, polls message boards, and spends exorbitant amounts of money on polarized lenses, brand names, and any other feature that brings up the price.

It'll be an early Father's Day, I guess.

We went to an alpaca farm yesterday for a shearing festival. It was lots of fun, they had baby alpacas, and how cute were the newly shorn ones, with their long gangly necks?

This conversation occurred while driving off the highway on a long and winding track through the woods to get to the isolated farm:

The Earner: Wow, I guess the alpacas like it quiet, huh?
The Clogger: Maybe they're very private alpacas.
Me: Maybe they're ninja alpacas!

Yes, my family thinks I'm nuts. And my multiple requests for an alpaca (they're on SALE!) went ignored.

The Invasion

2008-05-22T15:58:00.002-05:00

I hit snooze this morning, woke up 10 minutes late, ran downstairs to put on a pot of coffee and grab the clothes out of the dryer, ran back upstairs to hop in the shower and...

ANTS!!!

Apparently the herd of ants currently residing in my walls (floors?) has minty fresh breath, because about a million of those little fuckers were trailing to the ring around The Earner's mouthwash on the bathroom counter.

Bleary-eyed and half naked, I vaporized them with some type of chemical bathroom cleaner spray, cleaned every item that was on the counter top, then wiped up their soggy remains and hopped into the shower.

This early morning ant removal caused me to be late, and the babysit kid and mom were knocking on the door and texting me as I hopped around drying off and trying to find my glasses.

Not a good morning, but the day has definitely improved. David Cook won (we ti-fauxed and watched this morning), we've had some wonderful Kapla block creations, and now the sun is finally out, so we're headed outside!

Is it a bad sign that any time I go to clean something the Clogger or Earner say to me "oh, were there ants in there?" I have been known to clean occasionally! I just try not to make a habit of it.

In Three Parts

2008-05-20T12:56:00.003-05:00

Never ending rain and chill has caused me to turn the furnace on today. I KNOW!!! I run a tight ship around here and my policy is once flowers start blooming the heat goes OFF, but I can't take much more of the 61 degrees in this damp house and I'm so blooming tired that my bones are already aching. So I lose.

The Clogger is having oral pain. Dr Death put a spacer in for her last summer, and now she's got a tooth trying to come in and it's pushing on her back molars, causing pain all over the place. Appointment is later this week. She's a bit of a hysteric when it comes to discomfort. Hope that issue is resolved some day, or I'll never have grandchildren.

Our Sunday trip to Six Flags Great Adventure went well. The other Youth leader and I took 7 kids, plus my family, and it rained the entire day. Well, that's not true. We had an hour and a half in the morning before the skies opened up, then it was rain ponchos and a car ride through the safari until Mass, when it simply poured on all us poor souls sitting on the wet aluminum bleachers in the stadium, and then 20 minutes after Mass it cleared up again and we rode 'coasters with no lines until we left. The Clogger was most brave, riding Dark Knight and some other spooky coasters. I was very impressed with her. Less so with my spouse, who seemed to want to limit her to Wiggles World. He's still holding an image of the 3 year old screaming her head off on a rolling train at a town carnival... from SEVEN years ago. We'll have to work on that.

I'll be honest with you, ma'am, it ain't like mama fixed it.

2008-05-17T10:13:00.003-05:00

I am aware that my paltry readership has dwindled in my absence, so in a valiant attempt to win the three of you back, I will be posting more than ever. New! and Improved! Now with Gravy!

I attempted biscuits and gravy for the Clogger today. She has been asking for them ever since my brother's wedding in January, where every morning at the Lincoln, NE hotel all of my brothers inhaled large quantities of fluffy golden biscuits smothered in creamy pale gravy with glorious nuggets of sausage floating in it.

So imagine her surprise when I plunked down in front of her a plate of flat bottom-burnt pucks of chewy dough with a gooey grayish-brown gelatinous substance on top of them.

Dairy and egg free is hard, people! Everyone ate them, no problem. The Earner even declare them "delicious." That may have been because I accidentally over salted the gravy, though.

* Anyone know where the title of the post comes from?