~The Silent Angel~

Back to square 1!!!

2009-10-20T00:11:00.002+08:00

Most of the time everything is fine and dandy.... but there's also a time in your life where things just sux to the max.... Work hasn't been kind to me and it's been worst.... I'm back where i've started and it's worst then being at one... i'm at zero now... life's a freaking Bitch....

Can't breath...

2009-05-21T17:58:00.002+08:00

I believe there's always a stage in life that we tend to feel smother and suffocated by thing and situations. I believe i'm have such a situation... lol... I think it's when things are too intense that we'll have a sudden urge to break free from what every the cause.

Hates the person i once called....

2009-03-04T21:27:00.002+08:00

It's just the beginning of a nightmare. I was never fond of that person... And now it has turn to pure hate and disgust. How can such a person even live...? I'm really disgusted by his actions. Such an old bastard should know better.. How can he claim to be older and wise... ? I have totally no respect for him anymore... He doesn't appriciate my mum nor any one but himself... And i think that's sick and just a terrible thing to do to some one especially to some one close.... If he want's to leave , just leave and leave with dignity and be a man... But instead of doing that, he's acting like a total bastard and making our life misserable. He doesn't give my mum any money for the housewhole items and grosserys. and expects her to have money for food and others...

NOTE to the BASTARD... We're no beggars... if u feel like it u give her money, if u don't feel like it u don't.... And expect RM50 can buy a damn full cart of stuff.... He's a cheap and ball-less bastard...!!!
That's all i can say and to me ... U'RE ALREADY DEAD...!!!

The person i'm referring to was previously call my dad... but not anymore.... so get the fuck out of my face and leave my mum alone.... so cya asshole...

it's all new... =)

2009-01-06T20:58:00.002+08:00

Well it's another year.... What a start, new job and it's totally different from what i've previousely done. I've jumped from a make up artist to a sale exec. for a telco company. Everything is still so new for me.. am still in the mist of training. I think i should be ok la.... But still hard to say... My memory might be failing me now... It seems kinda tough for me to remember... lol... side effects man...

Merry Christmas...

2008-12-16T00:34:00.003+08:00

Recently, i'm noticed that the contents of my blog isn't really that uplifting.Lol... And since it's gonna be the holiday season, i really should be a bit cheerful after all the crap.... =) So here's and Early x'mas wish.... "Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you guys!" Don't party too hard ya...

glitter-graphics.com

Stressful Neighbours

2008-12-10T15:24:00.003+08:00

Recently, I've notice a certain increase in foreigners in the neighbourhood... It's starting to get really stressful living around here. There's a lot of Afro and middle eastern people... They're so called students but i think they are more of a menace here.. There are like so uneducated ppl and doesn't even have the common courtesy to being quiet and respectful to others around... They are like barbarians here. You can still find them chatting and shouting from the top floor of where they stay to the opposite building and to the car park... It's so annoying... They even do it after midnight and may i state that i'm living in an apartment which is why the whole block can hear their conversations....

They even have a weird liking as to talking really loud outside of their home which i find really odd. Like they don't have a home or something... We've tried to ask them to be quiet once but their reaction was to challenge us and he like wanted to start a fight... oh my... May i just state that they are a visitor in our country yet they act as if they own the place and act without respect and the right attitude...

I've also heard that there's a lot of fake passports and fake certificates going around. I think the government should really stop taking in so much overseas students... They're more of a threat to the country and to it's people...
It's staring to get scary here... I'm sure it's happening at a lot of place around kl...

Unashame Old Fox...

2008-11-29T14:04:00.006+08:00

Friday night, thought it would be a great night just to chill and go for a movie... But guess who i say... my dad... how unlikely, he's never taken us to the movies ever... and here he is with that unashamed old fox. Suddenly, i was over come with disgust and just felt sick from the sight. It's sad how he could just leave my mum at home and hang out with that B*tch.. ( Which has made all our life miserable ) At last, I've seen her face... short, short hair, glasses and unappealing. I made sure he knew i was there and yet what made me sick was that he could still smile and ask me about mum. I totally ignored him. I made my way right in front of them without looking at them and ignoring his questions.... I regretted that.. I should have stopped right in front of them and took a long cold look at that unshameful face... But i didn't... ( My dad has never even spend time just to understand us or care.. just by giving us shelter and money for studies and all... He thinks that's enough but it's not.. he's not even emotionally connected to us. He's never even taken us to the cinema.... Never... and there he going with that shameless B**** )
I've always heard people telling me that it's none of our business as children. But i can't hep but disagree with that statement. How can something be happening in the same family not be of any business of us... We're all connected in a way. People always assume that the parents are always with the trouble when encountered with such a situation, but it isn't true. I always get this unseen pressure from both sides. It's like my dad would always blame my mum that she's not doing her job in teaching us and all... and she would blame us for not behaving and making my dad turn to the other house.... And that wasn't all... there's the hearing them fight abt the other house and the cries and screams of divorce... And just all the tensions... At that time i was pretty young... It was just a stressful family... We may look normal to others but not many know about whats going on...

I've always wondered how can someone whose been so close to another being be so cruel? Is there lack of communication or love or just everything? He has made me lost so much... I've lost faith in men, in love, in forever...

Although, I've not been close to my dad even since i was younger, but i still had a respect for that man. I've always though that he was some one that was honest and loyal... like the Chinese would say "The cat that doesn't eat fish" or " A person who'll have feces rather than steal." But ever since, i knew respect for that man turned to Zero. None what-so-ever. I've even stopped calling him. And then it goes again mum blaming me of making him turn to the other side... and he would start using us as topic of her not doing her part and threatening her of divorce... So just tell me ... How can it not be our problem too?? we face the stress and emotional roller coaster too... And yet, we don't have any say in it...
I'm starting to find myself depressing and just sick. How can something start with love and trust end up like just a fair trade of co-existing?? I've though many times of the day I'll see her face... I would walk up to her stare her in the eyes and just give her a cold hard slap on the face... Why would or could a woman ever share a man and knowingly ruin another family for her selfish needs... I despised her...
Although, I've been with a man who's already married. But i knew i couldn't do it... I stopped myself from going on any further. How could my dad not see what he was doing when i myself could know. And they say parents know more than us...

The hurt, the stress and the emotional tension .....

depressing

2008-11-22T15:57:00.002+08:00

It's another depressing news, another relative with colon cancer. Now he's in Icu. . . It's becoming really comman these days...

Monday will be a new experience for me... It's a new work place and something new to me. Sales... never really done anything like it b4 ( sale promoter doesn't not count ) Excited and intimidated at the same time....

About to blast... 3...2...1... Blast Off.!

2008-11-19T14:11:00.002+08:00

I'm kinda upset abt my mum going on and on and on abt the countings of these Visiber. Actually, i have nothing against all these superstitions but it's really going way overboard. I'll have to rip my head off just to keep myself sane... It started like this... My cousin's wife is one of these so called agents who calculate your birthday and all to find out about you. And so she started counting for my family and my mum started to indulge in all these babling... I was just curious and so i listen to what she had to say about me... Thinking it was all just for fun... But heck.. my mum got so drawn into it.. thinking it's like a bloody saviour... She starts to spend on all the numbers and products my cousin's wife's advices. And now she's still feeding my mum with all those stuff on people that are negative that should be in my home...asking me to not asking certain people over and all... OMG!!! It's seriously the last straw... I have been putting up with all the bullshit long enough... And now this.... It's seriously too much... I CAN'T TAKE IT ANY LONGER!!!!!

2008-11-19T01:06:00.004+08:00

This is my first nephew in Japan..

This is My second nephew.

Just to share a few pictures of my niece and nephews... They're like so cute...

This is my niece .. >>

Movie mania...

2008-11-19T00:49:00.002+08:00

I was really glad that i got to catch 2 movies lately.. Haven't been visiting the cinemas for ages... And so I was so looking forward to watching The Coffin, I thought it was supposed to be a siamese movie but it turned out to be in English... What a bonus.. I don't have to read the subtitles... lol... I've heard that the movie didn't had a great review, but i was keen on watching it. Guess what? I thought it was alright.... no seriously... it isn't that bad... I found it rather scary and boy did i let out a lil'scream... *blush* It had it's frightening moment.. Plus it had a simple twist to it in the end...
Next on my movie list was Madagascar 2. I'm a big fan of cartoons and this was a "Not to be missed Movie". lol..
It was so much better then i expected... It was freaking funny... !! I thought it was better then the first one. This one had so much more to offer. For all those who's haven't seen it... Go quick...!! And you'll be moving it.... =)

Right now I'm like a spoiled lil'brat looking forward to all the cartoons soon to be screened in cinemas.... Thank god for the school holidays... There's Igor, Bolt and Space Chimps soon to come... Yippie.... !

Peace at last..

2008-11-14T11:33:00.002+08:00

Recently, my aunt pass on due to colon cancer. It's not a sickness i'm unaware of these days. It was the same as my grandpa, but the only difference was my aunt had 3 different bags for blood, feces, and some other liquid. And so may she finally Rest In Peace...

Feelings...

2008-09-25T00:25:00.003+08:00

Well, it’s almost the weekends and yes… I’m feeling very unproductive… and why am i not surprise…?? Haiz… After my trip to Sg, I’ve been hiding out from the sun it seems… being a nocturnal being now… and it’s not something new though.

But these few nights i’ve been thinking a whole lot of my grand papa… I miss him so much. It has only been 3 months since he left, and things haven’t quite been the same… It’ll never be i guess. I recently read a friend’s blog saying that she’s never had the feeling of sadness when her grandparent pass on coz she was too young to even know anything… She mention that she was both envious and relieved about it. I guess i know what she means… In a way.. But i would have rather knew and loved my grandparents this long or even longer and be in pain after they have left, for at least i had my time and loved and got pampered by them… I would not have wished it any other way…

This hurt and pain that i’m feeling will last was longer that i think it would…. But hey… life goes on… I still miss you so much..!!..

Plans revoked..

2008-08-29T01:39:00.006+08:00

Recently AirAsia has once again offered 1 million free seats to their designated destinations. I was so *On* on having a holiday to Krabi since I loved the last Phuket trip. I was so geared up for the trip next year... But now it seems like it's Bye-bye to Krabi and hello to Redang... Well, it's not that bad but i was just so excited about going to Thailand again... Just can't seem to get enough of it... Plus the beach is beautiful in Krabi... *Drooling*....~~~ Well, I suppose I'll have to postponed this plan...I'm a bit upset about it... so so sad...!!! But a trip is better then none...
Anyway, i have been asked to give my pets a bath but i like them the way they are... What am i going to hug when i go to sleep... lol... I've just watched Wall E, it has very little conversations but a great movie... Very enjoyable indeed.... Plus the expression are damn good... enought to get the message across and cute too.... Thumbs up....

Pecah kepala

2008-08-19T20:33:00.002+08:00

Well, what can i say... We have been asking our lovely grandmother not to buzy herself with all the housework which doesn't really need to be done. She tends to find just anything to do at home even if it doesn't really matter. And this time she found that her curtains was dusty or something and so she took a chair and climbed up to fix it... but like all grandmothers at a certain age... they're bound to be a bit clumsy and has less balance to their bones... And so like Humpty Dumpty... she fell down, knocking the back of her head causing it to bleed instantly. We got the call right away from our uncle and so we headed over to bring her to the Sunway Medical centre's A&E... Being an A&E it's certainly is slow... we waited for an hour before the doctor even start to take a look at her... So don't believe what you see on tv... (E.R) We were there for more then 2 and a half hours.... And it cost us RM300++ ... But we're lucky that she's alright and just had 4 stitchs. What a tough old bird she is...

After a long time.

2008-08-19T20:29:00.002+08:00

Anyway, met up with my good friend yesterday and we seem to be a bit crazy over a particular ps2 game called Harvest Moon. Since we went on and on and on about it... lol... She's been hook on that one game for 3 months straight and was very persistence to finish it... I've yet to get myself started thought. Well, it's been more then half a year since i've seen her and we could just hit it off as usual... Such a chatter box we are... oh my...

Games begin

2008-08-19T20:14:00.004+08:00

Everything is about the Olympics lately, I was also caught hogging the TV to watch my favourite activities... Gymnastics, diving and weight lifting... It's a bit freaky though looking at weight lifting... lol... but quite entertaining i might say. It was a big upset for the badminton fans... I'm not much of a fan of badminton but i was somehow drawn to watch the match of Malaysia Vs China Men Single Final. It wasn't much to watch... Our Malaysian player wasn't in top form plus the extreme pressure and stress has gotten the most of him... And the Gold medal was China's Lin Dan.... Our one and only chance to a gold medal was finish in less then 45min... That was quick... Currently I'm looking forward to watching rhythm gymnastic...

Phuket 20/07/08 - 23/07/08

2008-08-11T22:47:00.009+08:00

Something really sad happened.. my dearest grandpa passed on 11/06/08. That's the same date my second bro returned from Japan just to see him. Grandpa left us a few hours after my bro touched down. I'm still mourning his demise but i think it's a conclusion for everyone even himself. although, I'm deeply sadden at least I think he knows that he was well loved and still is... So *Kong kong* rest well... (We love and miss ya..!) Hmmm..what else... let's see where to start... Ah-ha.. well, I have been freelancing at my fren's company and I just came back from Phuket last month..

Well I think Phuket is beautiful... Nice beach, nice sand, and great sun... Lol... too bad i didn't get as tan as i wanted to... Didn't shop much either.. OMG!!! I didn't get much for myselff...damn it.. it's so unfair....
Isn't it just beautiful... such white sandy beach not forgetting soft too... I wouldn't mind heading back to this destination... Hehehe... Too bad some incident kinda ruin my mood for the holiday... Or not it would have been really really perfect... lol. *with load'sa shopping* lol...

Even the streets are extra pretty, what to do for sucker like us ma... tourist... We stayed in a nice hotel called Club Andaman the rooms are really spacious, just take a look ..
Sweet right?? But there's one down side to it... there's a lot of nyamuk la... Killed almost 20 of them on the first night , and on the second nite a few more... Talk about blood suckers man...

It seems that phuket is also famous for their night life.. so we explored... lol.... Oh my every where we turn in bangla road there's A go-go bars and clubs and disco... There's males, females, and those in between... *scary..!*
There's one place you must not miss if your in Phuket..
And that's Simon cabaret. The performers are all lady boys.
And they have quite a variety or so to say a mix of better rated lady boys... The set thru out the the whole show is amazing... worth every penny i paid ma.. and that's RM70 per pax. Just look at this pretty guy or should i say gal?? I don't know.... Really damn paiseh man standing next to him/her...
There's also these things i was looking for, well actually my mum wanted it. It's shredded pork rolls.. quite yummy i must say.. It's actually called Dog shit *kao sai* in hokkien.. don't ask..!! But if your in thailand you should try them it's yummy yummy...

When ever I think of Thailand, I think of Tom Yam...!! Yummy... Didn't quite have it everyday but I had my fair share during my stay there... Thank god i didn't "lau sai" or not my ass would have been burning like hell...

Just look at the ang mo kids in the clear water.... enjoying themself sweet...

Anyway, sea water always gets the best of females... our eyebrows star

t to vanish, eye-bags suddenly appears and voilah we've transformed... Boy do we look different... hahahaha... But then again to hell with the looks, i'll have to put myself esteem away just that very day... It's the beach i'm suppose to enjoy all of it... =)

Just look at the lovely beach and scoring.. Isn't it just perfect to get your skin burned?? hehehe.... I seriously would consider heading back there for another holiday adventure... What can i say...? I'm a sucker for the beach... Next was the night life... We wen't to a place called Banana Disco. It's said to be "The" place to be... Quite affordable i might add.. The cover charge was 400 Baht with 2 drinks cocktails, soft drinks or liquor... It's a great bargain... But like all things... it must come to an end... even great things...

So bidding Phuket farewell with a group picture.... and we were off....

Scary... 7 month

2008-08-11T20:13:00.005+08:00

It's that time of the year where stages will be springing out like mushrooms all over the country... These are make-shift shrines for the wandering souls. I used to be terrified of the 7 month of the Luna calendar. Too much freaking ghost story polluted my brains. When i was younger there was all these really scary story's about seeing half visible bodies / Ugly blood-shot face of the departed... I literally slept with the lights ON every night of that month. Afraid that I'll have a gleams or encounter with them... But now i think I've grown accustom to it... It's a big part of our culture. First you'll see 2 really huge make shift shelters, one is for the entertainment and the other will be for the deity. The image of the deity can be quite daunting. Although it's really colourful but the features of the deity is fierce, for it's hades and it's meant to rule the underworld. But there's also the entertainment area which from olden days they had Chinese opera shows to entertain the dead..and also the (living) i suppose...

Till this day I'm still quite intimidated by the whole idea and the whole ritual... Alright, alright i admit it... I'm afraid of ghost... And yeah you might be saying grow up la... But still it's still a very mysterious thing and I'm a scary cat ... lol

What happens when the trust is gone?

2008-08-05T02:20:00.004+08:00

I've always wondered, what "Does" happen when a person breaks that trust? I believe that it's hard to every regain... So what does a person do after that? Simply stop just at that or do we even bother to build back that trust? I don't know I'm confuse... I've had a few close friend that would just stop everything when that barrier of trust was broken. Hmm.... I think I'm thinking too much...

First blog

2008-08-01T03:13:00.004+08:00

I 've recently found solitude in blogging, not that I've never blog before... just not in this new page. It's never easy to start something new and from scratch. Geez.... I hardly know where to start..?

Here's a rough picture of what's in front of me. * Me staring blankly at my Pc*

Haven't had any inspiration since my dear ol'grandpa passed. Talking about inspiration, I recall my grandpa saying this just days before he passed on... "You never fail to make me smile when you're here, You're my inspiration." When I do think about it, I don't think it's true... Coz I'll have to say that "He" was my Inspiration not I... I miss him so much!!! I might just post up some pictures of him instead of my own... =) Love You Grandpa, where ever you are....!