The Big Aiyah

Game...

2007-01-14T23:31:00.000-08:00

He got game...She got game...WTF?

Everyone's got game. No one has the "game" market cornered. Everyone at any time has the capability of impressing or sweeping someone of the opposite sex completely off of their feet. It's been scientifically proven - watch Hitch...hehe.

Sarcasm aside, I am a true believer in this theory.

Ladies and gents, Shooter isn't a looker, he's not as cute as he thinks he is. What he is, however, is highly observant, terribly intelligent, and downright fearless. Go figure...

Game, to me, is a play off of Sun Tzu's Art of War (if you haven't read it, read it...now! It's applicable for both business and personal endeavors). The theory is simple:

1. Know your prospect as you know yourself
2. Put yourself in a position which makes defeat improbable, if not impossible
3. Buy a Lotto Ticket! Kidding...the meaning here is that you can't win the lotto if you don't first buy a ticket and play. In other words, you can't date the girl if you don't approach the girl and state your intentions. Be bold.

Proper application of these principles gives you an advantage that is is difficult to defend against. Okay, okay....it's not that simple...sue me. There is more to it than this - but these are the seeds. I'll elaborate on the rest later...

Playing the player....

2007-01-06T18:42:00.000-08:00

No...not referring to me...well, ok-I guess it can refer to me in certain applications. Here's a scenario:

Hot chick...I mean SMOULDERING. Let's call her Chiquita Banana...Chiquita for short.

She's swatting away suitors like med schools do applicants.

Yep, she's the queen bee, the center, the Alpha female, the Player.

She's the girl that hooks guys into buying her drinks, taking her to dinner, lavish her with gifts, and with compliments, blah, blah, blah...

We all know at least one Chiquita in our circle, don't we?

To further the scenario:

Months ago, blinded by her beauty, Shooter nearly got caught in her web, but through the grace of the Almighty, managed to cheat fate and escape (ta da!). Still, out of morbid curiousity decided to stay close to see who else might fall victim to Chiquita's exotic powers.

Shooter decided to play aloof...staying within buzz range to maintain his visibility - not too close as to be creepy, and not too far to appear disinterested.

Shooter began the slow and steady process of establishing value in himself...but not do so in a direct manner...nay, such an act would appear as self promotion and would subsequently thwart our hero's attempts at wooing her.

Nope, he decided that others should be the vessel at pronouncing his coolness..hehe. He employed the use of his cronies to spread the gospel of Shooter. "Man, he can dance", and "he's a really cool guy", "he's funny as f_ck", etc...

Lo and behold, Chiquita notices. Her demeanor has changed ever so lightly. She slinks by, touching Shooter suggestively and gave a knowing smile.

It's working...

"My turn." This time, Shooter plays hard to get.

With the air of feigned disinterest, Shooter payed little attention to her, only in so far as to not be rude, but to be courteous.

Dissatisfied with Shooters inexplicably mild response, Chiquita amped up her barrage; the peacock opening her full array of illustrious feathers, if you will.

Still, our hero showed no change in expression - not even a glance to display that he is impressed or enamored.

Shooter continued the indirect display of value like the steady rush of the incoming tide. Friends stopping by and greeting him, geniunely wanting to hang out with him, further validating his qualities as a friend. In addition enjoying other women grace him with their prescence, further validating his qualities as a potential mate/lover.

All of this Chiquita sees...and takes serious note of. "This guy is different"

Occassionally, Shooter sends an obtuse message or gift. Obtuse from the standpoint that the receiver cannot tell if it is one out of friendship or amor. Effectively, he baits his line and teases Chiquita, enticing her to delve more into understanding Shooter, his qualities, and his intentions and further reinforcing her desire to get closer to him.

Ladies and Gents...the object of the game:

"Be not the moth.....be the flame".

Laying the foundation..

2007-01-03T16:33:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone, I'm Shooter.

A little background on me: I'm single, educated, in my 30's, experienced, athletic, and dating.

On a frequent basis, I'll be spewing tidbits about my views on relationships, dating, sex, and hygiene from a decidedly male perspective. Please don't get me wrong - I'm not a mysogynist. On the contrary, I love women and enjoy their company and long to have a meaningful relationship with someone who is affectionate, intelligent, kind, godfearing, and confident. Until that fortuitous time, I will continue to date and (as my mother always says) "collect and select" to both pass the time and to enjoy the interaction.

So, let me begin with a little rant about "one-itis". One-itis is an illness that afflicts SINGLE men who dangerously fixate on one woman at a time. I say dangerously because this effectively is putting all your eggs in one basket. I currently avoid one-itis like the black plague. One must think of the time you spend with women along the same lines as the money you invest for the future. For all intents and purposes, they are quite similar. Your goal is to maximize your return on investment and minimize risk. So, when a guy spends all of his effort courting ONE woman of unknown value at a time, he risks excessive emotional injury and loss of valuable time and emotional capital.

So why not spread out that risk? Why not date more than one woman at a time?

To be clear, I'm not promoting cheating or infidelity or anything like that. What I am advocating is a more polyamorous and adult approach to dating where all information is above board. You effectively reduce risk and improve your possibility of finding the girl that fits you best. Imagine a situation where you're dating numerous women you share interests with and find that you truly enjoy the time you are spending with a specific one. You enjoy her so much, you forsake the rest. Wouldn't you feel better about making a life changing decision based on this epiphany?

Now doesn't that sound nice? You bet.

Potholes.

There are inherent problems with this method. Sadly, they usually orginate with your prospects:
1. Attachment- some of your prospects may develop attachment issues. Let's face it, you may too, but that refers back to one-its. The key to absolving yourself of this is to be entirely honest about your dating capabilities. Let them know that you're not interested in exclusivity at the moment and prefer to feel your way along with her holding your hand, constantly hoping for the best.
2. Klingons - this is the kissing cousin of attachment. More to the point, Klingons are exactly that: kling-ons. The stalker chicks who absolutely have to be the only hen in the henhouse and will make your life increasingly difficult because they will not stand to be Seven of Nine. Sadly, you must boot these alpha females. Nuff said.
3. Money - being poly amorous is a very expensive proposition. Dating is not cheap. Be forewarned.
4. Schedule - related to money. There are only so many days in the week and so many hours in the day. Juggling a dating schedule with work and friend/family committments can and will be tricky. It takes a steady hand...

Please understand that this strategy to combat the risks inherent in dating one woman at a time is based on strict HONESTY. The moment you lie, quibble, or glean over information, you sacrifice your integrity and you may hurt someone badly. It's been done - don't do it. Be clear about your capabilities, and if they see enough value in you, they'll stick around. It's your job to establish that value. More about establishing value later...

**Ladies, this strategy is not meant to reduce your value to us. It is meant to reduce the impact of you saying "no" and keeps us moving forward. Men are physically strong beings with fragile egos. A striking woman, 5'1" in stature, and dressed in a great outfit will easily crush a 6'4" 250lb man by simply saying "no" to his genuine advance. This is just one way to reduce that impact while not losing our motivation to find the one for us...it'll hurt, it just won't hurt that bad.

New Year, New Writer

2007-01-03T16:14:00.000-08:00

Hello all,

I would like to introduce you to Shooter, a good friend of mine, who is joining BRL on The Big Aiyah as a new writer. I won't say too much but just enjoy his take on life. I look forward to seeing what he brings you and what you all bring to him.

Voodoo

2005-08-19T09:51:00.000-07:00

Sad men frighten birds away.
Down to their pensive foreheads descend
the clouds
and dissolve into an opaque drizzle.
Flowers languish
in the gardens of the sad men.
Their precipices tempt death.
Whereas
the women that are within a woman
are all born at the same time
in front of the sad eyes of the sad men.
The woman vessel again opens her belly
and offers the sad man her redeeming milk.
The woman child kisses with fervor
his paternal, desolate widower’s hands.
And she who walks silently in the house
shines his black hours and patches up
all the holes in his breast.
There is another that lends to the sad man
her two hands as if they were wings.
But sad men are deaf to their music.
There is no lonelier woman then,
more sadly lonely,
than she who wants to love a sad man.

-Piedad Bonnet

2005-01-31T16:19:00.000-08:00

::I feel so lucky

We went out to eat and no sparks ignited. Whew, that would have been soooo bad. Thank God, I didn’t develop feelings towards my friend’s ex. I didn’t want to be Chandler secretly in love with Joey’s girlfriend or Joey obviously in love with Rachel. I’m glad that I wouldn’t be tormented if I saw any of the ubiquitous Friends DVDs.

The girl and I are still friends and still have a good time whenever we see each other. We don’t see each other regularly, which is good for me; otherwise I don’t know if I would feel differently. It’s just that there was a week in which I didn’t, couldn’t trust myself. It wasn’t all sexual, she is a very attractive woman, but I was more “curious” because of her personality and traits. It was because **drum roll** she could always make me laugh. Not just a regular “haha”, then go to the next joke, but frequently get me (and each other) a full belly laugh that would fuel hours worth of laughs. We also share a lot of interest that can quickly delve us into conversations that span politics, current affairs, adult swim lineup, etc.

I’m just feeling relieved that I didn’t have to start berating myself for getting really interested in a friend’s recent ex. That would have been my bad. It’s not like there aren’t a lot of beautiful, intelligent, witty, down-to-earth women available, it’s just that it’s hard to date people you have a good connection to. Those usually turn out to be your friends and I love all of them. That’s why I feel so lucky that I didn’t have to cross any boundaries this past week.

2004-12-12T18:55:00.000-08:00

"Most of the people I know are either really into a relationship or really really single."

Is this a late 20s phenomenon? Is this isolated to single Asians? Or is this statement from a localized point of view?

As the months turn to years, the polarization of my friend’s relationship status has become more acute. I can only name a couple of friends who are still seeking/working to be in a relationship. They are the statistical anomalies. Right now, in the middle of the holiday season (and upcoming Valentine’s day), when in years past most of my single friends would lament that they want to be with somebody, most singles are actually happy being single. By rote, we explain that we’re not against being in a relationship if the right person comes along, but until then, we’re actually relishing the single life. Can it get lonely? Of course, if you don’t have real friends; especially “special” friends.

At the other extreme are my relationship friends, though still funny and cool, they have lost something. Seems like the work that they have put into making the relationship work and last has taken the very spontaneity and creativeness that got them in the relationship. I’m not talking about my married/family friends; they have a huge responsibility that necessitates following a scripted plan. Just like Bill Walsh back in the day, my family friends need to follow the first 15 plays to ensure that the team wins in the end. I’m talking about my relationship friends who are actually worse than my family friends. It seems that they are more sardonic and have not had a good belly laugh the past 2 years.

Hey, I know I’m being very subjective here. I’m sure most of my friends, in a relationship or not, are happy in some way or another. But, I guess the gist or my rant is directed to all the people, my relatives especially, that I don’t NEED to be in a relationship, let alone be married. Just because I’m getting older and beginning to establish myself that the next step is to get married. It would be a logical next step if I needed to sire children to help till my 40 acres and plant rice.

Off the soap box I go.

2004-08-20T15:32:00.000-07:00

So, I'm giving her another chance.
I really don't know if it's because I subconsciously/deeply like this girl or just because nothing better has come. I used to think it was the latter, but it has been quite a few months already and she's still here and standing. I promised myself that for ONCE in my life, I'm not going to apply (and bring) up most of the criterias that I have used in the past; to whether or not to go for a woman.
Man, it used to be alot easier than this. It used to be:
"Hey, she smiled at me. I like her!"
"She got some titties!"
"She's cute and her pump is pretty high."
"She's hella fine!"
"She's hella fine with some titties and bootie!"
"She got BACK!"
Then it turned to:
"She's cute and gives it up"
Fast-forward a bit and it evolved to:
"She's f*** fine and smart. Damn, I want her!"
"She's pretty, smart, and atheletic. Nice!"
"She's pretty, smart, atheletic, and hella funny. She's the girl for me!"
(This by the way in my opinion was the pinnacle. I should have stayed with the best one at this time and married her. NO JOKE).
Now, it's:
"She's cool"
"She's alright, but has a good job"
"She's cool, with a good job, and only one kid."
"She's cool, with a job, and baby daddy is out of the picture"
"She's cool."
So, this is what experience and maturing gives us? Being a consumate critic. Are all of the good girls really married? I know there's still really fantastic women out there, but how do you meet these mystical beings?
Oh wait.....I'm supposed to give her another chance.
--Holla back ladies with how your criterias have evolved as well

2004-08-13T06:34:00.000-07:00

::legacy and love

I just finished dumping some depressing shit on my personal blog; about how none of us can really leave a lasting legacy. So of course this got me thinking about whether loving someone for an extended period of time can be considered a legacy.

I hear about these couples who have been together for 20+ number of years and they state that they are still in love. 20+ years! How come the longest I've ever been in that state is one and a half years max? Is it biological? I know it's not a male-thing because I know folks who are still in that love mode for over 5 years.

We have gyms and fads that help us get in better physical shape and hopefully lead us to a lifestyle of healthy living that we can enjoy. Where are the love gyms? I haven't seen a yoga mat of love at Walgreens. What about cardio-intimacy?

What I really want to know is after the intimacy, passion, and ecstacy of "being in love" subsides (or does it), is the love transformed into "best friend love". Or if one gets married does it become "family love"; where it goes unsaid but is tacit.

2004-07-06T16:29:00.000-07:00

::skeet! skeet! skeet!
I just thought this was the funniest thing.
Skeet

2004-07-06T16:24:00.000-07:00

::M.I.L.F
Is Cuba Goodings right, when he stated in ‘Jerry McGuire’ that, “it’s wrong to get the nani from a single mother; that’s a sacred thing?”

My boy Adam said it shouldn’t matter, but it’s hard when you make the mistake of getting to know the person first. What was I thinking?! She’s really cute, Lucy Liu spunky cute and a sweet, wonderful person. She keeps saying she wants to start dating; and my spidey senses are telling me that’s a hint and a half for us to kick it on a new level. But, what level is that? Is it let me warm her up and get her used to the dating scene again? Is it: she’s an adult, and adults have very adult needs, and this is what this adult wants do? Or, is it let’s get warm together and try to build something?

I’m really kicking myself for being considerate and having a conscious here, but I’m not 19 anymore, and I know her now. Most will ask, why I just don’t go for it and see where it goes. The thing is I’ve already tried that and concluded that the best we were going to be was friends. It’s the privileges part that I’m debating with myself.

2004-04-09T17:17:00.000-07:00

I know we really never did anything malicious to each other. I don't even think, we ever had an argument. I know you patiently waited for me to open myself up and trust you emotionally. But, I felt the same way, that you are only showing me your emotions that ride on the surface.

We had good times, without the humor.
You have my friendship, without the bond.
You are my lover, without the love.

You tried so hard to win my affection. In trying, you forgot to show me who I was to allow to win me over. All I ever saw was the effort. You did not consider that I am perceptive enough, to learn and understand your qualities, if they are not forced. I know we never did anything malicious to each other, so letting you go should not hurt.

2004-03-17T11:41:00.000-08:00

...I wasn't always like this continued
As I've grown; I've learned, made mistakes, re-applied lessons, and re-introduce myself to me. Throughout the melange of transformations and personal mantras, specific songs have defined my personal anthem or battlecry. So, let me bite off of Dave Chappelle's skit, "Dave on Dave" and see (for myself) how I've changed through the years.
At 14: Relationships - When asked what's going on with the girl I've been talking too, I'd reply, "ohhh man...we just messin' (even though I'm head over heels trippin over her)."
Theme songs - "If It Isn't Love" by New Edition, "I'll Give Al My Love" by Keith Sweat, "Here and Now" by Luther Vandross

At 18: Relationships - When asked what's going on with the ladies, I'd reply, "don't matter...all these females are b**ches and sl**ts anyway."
Theme songs - "O.P.P." by Naugty by Nature, "If You Want It" by 2nd II None

At 22: Relationship - When asked what's going on with the ladies, I'd reply, "s*****! YOU tell me?!"
Theme songs - "Pony" by Ginuwine, "Don't wanna be a Player" by Joe, "Sumthin Sumthin" by Maxwell

25+: Relationship - When asked what's going on with the ladies, I'd reply, "I was on the road to marriage, but boy I must have been driving drunk."
Theme songs - "Let's Get Married" Jagged Edge, "The Light" by Common, "Where I wanna Be" by Donnell Jones

2004-03-09T18:22:00.000-08:00

::seeing the world through roughed-up Raybans

Excluding couples who are married, engaged, or are just in their "honeymoon phase," are there really guys who are happy in their current relationship?

As Chris Rock said, "a man is only as loyal as his options." Someone, please tell me, I'm way offbase in how I feel about relationships, and C.R. and myself are in the minority as far as guy's group think.

2004-02-23T18:22:00.000-08:00

::I wasn’t always like this
not in the beginning. I used to love wholeheartedly and unconditionally; oblivious to my (current) girlfriend’s faults (flaw? What flaw?). Grateful to God, fate, circumstance, and to her for being in my life and allowing me to show her my affection and gratitude. Days were filled with excitement and adventure as we dared our own tolerances for danger and thrill. Moments lasted as we indulged in each other’s aspirations, hopes, trepidation, needs, and pleasure with what we have in front of us.
I used to think of being in a relationship as an idyllic sanctuary of deep understanding, dreams, and dare I say it; love. Our refuge from the realities and cruelties of the world was the comfort and security from each other’s voice, embrace, soft steady gaze, and unconscious belief that we’ll never be alone.
It used to be so easy to articulate and describe the wonder that was her and the bliss that was us.
In short I was in love, and believed in love.
After being cheated on and dismissed by my first two loves; love became commercial and superficial. Commercial in that greed presided; to make sure I got what I wanted before I can remotely get hurt. Superficial in that the guise of a potential romance, let alone a relationship was only a gambit to fight a nasty spell of loneliness.
I’d like to think and do believe that I was never malicious in any tryst and/or romance that I engaged into. I know I’ve never cheated on a girlfriend. But, I know I’ve never been able to commit wholeheartedly to anyone since.
By putting it in black and white, I’m asking myself, “what are you looking forward to when you begin to get involved in a relationship with someone?”

….to be continued

2004-02-10T18:03:00.000-08:00

::riddle me this

I have a friend; alright a "special friend". She's not just a bootie-call, cuz we sometimes hangout during the weekends. I DON'T consider her my girlfriend, cuz we usually go bar-hopping/clubbing separately.

She's not just a bootie-call, cuz she's met my parents and I've met hers. She's not my girlfriend, cuz I've never invited her to any personal social circle functions/gatherings.

She's not just a bootie-call, cuz I sometimes tell the shit I have to put up with. She's not my girlfriend, cuz even though she holds me, I don't feel a sanctuary in her embrace.

The riddle is, is a non bootie-call, non girlfriend my valentine?

2004-02-01T23:16:00.000-08:00

::she inspires
The cold wet winds of 2004 blew in an enigma from the past. She landed with usual aplomb; flip comments, intrusive questioning, and engaging conversation; as if the gap between the last interaction have only been a couple days, not a couple of years.

I’d have to say she was the one girl who won me over. Not by her physical attractiveness, nor the credentials on her resume that makes parents say, “see THAT'S a good girl.” She had that intangible that made you want to listen to any subject that caught her fancy, and speak your dreams that you've never uttered to another soul. If someone was to ask me to list all the traits that I want for a soul mate/life partner; her qualities make her the closest any woman I've ever met.

For heaven's sake, I can say she is my muse, the one person who constantly brings me the spark of creativity and courage to strive for those dreams I've hidden even from myself.

::sweet november
So, if this girl is sooo great and on paper she's Aced the test, then why don't I feel the attraction and urge to be with her? Why do I feel that I'm not the only guy she's put this spell on? And why does that bother me?

Okay, I admit to have watched the movie, "Sweet November" with Charlize Theron and I feel like I'm Mr. January. She cares for me (I know that much) and so do I, but it doesn't go beyond that. We are physically attracted to each other, but.....?

It's like I'm Jerry Seinfeld, she's Ellain Benis! Now, if only a Terry Hatcher would pop into my social life (like that one Seinfeld episode), I swear, I wouldn't doubt nor question whether they were real or fake.

2003-11-12T22:11:00.000-08:00

~~Flip da Script~~

See how they lag...anyways I'm switching up Aiyah and making it a solo venture. Enjoy.

If any of you other aiyah heads want to write, go ahead. Impress me.

Voodoo

2003-08-21T11:58:00.000-07:00

what to do, what to do....

It seems like I get myself into situations where there's always a twist ... man o man

So, I kicked it w/ someone the other day ... albeit, I know her ex. Her ex and I aren't the best of friends, but we are cool. Am I wrong for pursuing anything with this female since I know her man?

And now I hear she that may still have feelings for him. But wouldn't any guy or girl still have some feelings for his or her ex. I tell myself to take things day by day and enjoy our time together, but sometimes my thoughts make it hard to enjoy her company.

Should I just not think with my head and just follow my heart? ... but there goes the risk of me getting hurt =(

*** sigh ***

2003-08-12T10:53:00.000-07:00

i just blogged a long entry and its now gone!... @&%&#%(#(%#(%!&%!*))_$^^@%%@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... crap...

like ahrnold,

i'll be back!

-jeebus

2003-08-02T12:09:00.000-07:00

Being "picky"

One girl seems to like me, but she has two babby daddies = turnoff
Another chick shows some interest, but I think she's too "dingy."
I think this one girl is cute, but she seems too quiet and laid back.

I know one has to be careful when meeting and selecting a mate, but shall I just not be too "picky." Do I blind myself to certain charateristics that may be just miniscule compared to the overall person?

hmm, is this why I'm single? ... being too "picky?!"

2003-07-28T14:42:00.000-07:00

Everything happens for a reason. What reason, I'm not quite sure. With as crappy as I was feeling last Thursday (reference Thursday's posting), I end up going to lunch with my co-workers (a guy and an girl) the next day. Summarily, my guy co-worker gets this phone call and we have to return to the office because he has to meet a friend at the office. Low and behold...my worries were swept away, almost numbed at the sight of his most HANDSOME friend Toby!

I know that that sounds really shallow...to enjoy just the very sight of a guy. Kinda sounds like what guys often do to women...but I didn't make a big ol' scene. Seeing Toby, his nice demeanor, and his good looks jolted me out of my misery. No I didn't want to jump him or anything... it's more like life was showing me that there are other guys out there since it was hard for me to hear it from people.

Ha ha ha...so I ended up updating my Friendster page, putting up a picture and enjoying the rest of the weekend. I watched "How to lose a guy in 10 days" this weekend. It was like seeing my life and then seeing what could be all in one movie! Well, check it out if you don't understand. I suppose that if it was meant to be...he would have taken a chance on me.

Then, I remembered too that I've got too much on my plate to worry about things like this. So, it's back to taking care of business! And you guys are right...there's no where else to go but up! Thanks!

2003-07-24T15:52:00.000-07:00

Just my luck...I finally find a nice down to earth guy (DVC guy) and well...I tells me he doesn't want to see me anymore.

I hadn't talked to him in three days. Left a couple of messages but didn't stalk him or anything. And I have to admit they were pretty upbeat messages. No why aren't you calling me kind of things. Just those simple, Hey how ya doin' messages.

Anyhow, last night, I get this deep sinking feeling that he just lost interest. I mean why else wouldn't he call me or answer my calls for three days after talking to each other every single day for the past 2 weeks. I was actually more upset last night not knowing if he was just going to NOT call or if he would be decent enough to call and tell me himself.

I guess I got what I wanted. The phone rang a little after lunch today. Across my LCD screen flashed his name. I got the are you busy can you talk openning line. He went on to explain that this "thing" with us just started off as too much of a whirlwind romance and that he just can't do it. He wants out. He said it wasn't anything about me or anything I did...just that he was feeling "boxed" in.

I still don't understand how he could feel "boxed" in when we hardly really saw each other. At most, we'd talk everyday. But, I didn't argue. How can you argue with "(he's) the only one that really knows (himself)" and he knows he can't continue whatever "this" is. He admitted that he's just probably scared of getting into a serious relationship, but whatever it is ...he needs to back out.

I told him I was glad he told me. It doesn't make me feel any better, but at least I'm not left hanging.

THEN, he tells me he still wants to be friends and he doesn't want me to hate him and that he'd like me to still call him if I need someone to talk to. I know his intentions were good but was this just another way making himself feel better for dumping on me? I suppose a part of me is bitter. I have enough "pals". I'm looking for the real thing which I saw a glimmer in him.

I don't hate him. I told him that amidst all the "whirlwind" that above all I simply enjoyed his company. Although it didn't really matter at that point, he said that he enjoyed mine too and that he wasn't trying to string me along.

I told him that I probably won't be calling him first. I put it in his court, since HE wanted "out" that the ball is in his court if he wants to talk to me.

I think I'll retire for a while from putting myself out there. My sister says someone's out there for me...to keep hoping that my "frog prince" will arrive. I dunno though. I seem to be on a streak with a bunch of toads.

2003-07-24T15:09:00.000-07:00

=)

Noticing an attractive you lady at the club, I decided to make her my goal of the night. Whenever was not busy, I talked to her. Without any fear, I let her know that I think she is attractive. I flirted with her by joking and smiling and it worked. During this process of dating, I was able to obtain a key component - her phone number.

Reading the comments from the "Ten Numbers" piece, I contemplated about my dilemma. When should I call? She gave me her number Saturday night, so do I call Tuesday or Wednesday? (Isn't this silly?) I decided to call on Tuesday, and received her voicemail. I was a little disappointed because the voicemail didn't even say her name. Was it even her number? I waited a day and made another attempt; she answered, we talked ... what a relief!

She gave me her number because I seem like a nice guy ; she also said she likes my smile. Now she made me smile and, while we were talking, I couldn't stop being "giddy" and smiling.

what happens from here, who knows

=)

2003-07-21T10:08:00.000-07:00

I started to write jeebus a comment and thought I'd just write it out...

My comments started as "I do have to say that in my younger day...I was definitely attracted to that bad boy syndrome. Looking back..I do think it was that sure-ness that the guy exumed. "

But at the same time, I think that the same goes for the real attractive looking guys. They too fall into those same tendencies. They end up with Bitches with attitudes. They don't go for the "nice" girls either.

I was at a bar last Thursday to pick up tickets for this concert from the owners and one of the owners says to one of his buddies, "I'm not into that provincial look...I'm all for the Miss Universe type!" Then he and his buddy give each other that cool closed fist "dap." Not that I want to get at him, but I don't fit into the Miss Universe category...

At the same token, I'd like to hope that there's still hope for finding someone that can be real. No lines, no drama...just someone who honestly just wants to get to know me. I have to admit though...because I am so independent...I would like a guy that takes control. Not in a mean or bad way..just someone that knows what he wants.