tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-314731252009-07-10T02:18:23.308+02:00Humour. Blog humoristique, par H. M. Gillen ( h.m.gillen@voila.fr )H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comBlogger137125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-59570167822042376282009-07-10T02:18:00.001+02:002009-07-10T02:18:23.456+02:00<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-5957016782204237628?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-36201288423890939952009-07-03T01:16:00.002+02:002009-07-10T00:00:00.456+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Si la femme est l'avenir de l'homme, n'ayant pas de femme je n'ai donc pas d'avenir.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em></em><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></em><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-3620128842389093995?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-57880066165199027792009-06-27T23:12:00.001+02:002009-07-02T23:28:08.175+02:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 35px; font-weight: bold;">Pour une pianiste, jouer sur un piano à queue et à quatre mains, il y a vraiment de quoi prendre son pied.</span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-5788006616519902779?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-10668856454027640412009-06-20T00:49:00.001+02:002009-06-27T23:10:08.795+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Faites la moue, pas la gueule.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-1066885645402764041?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-32684643724043925562009-06-11T23:00:00.001+02:002009-06-20T00:47:21.462+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Je compense le fait d'avoir du travail en retard par celui d'avoir du sommeil d'avance.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-3268464372404392556?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-88043694399704495712009-06-04T00:16:00.005+02:002009-06-11T23:32:07.578+02:00<span class="Apple-style-span" style=""><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: bold;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">Si les toilettes du Vatican sont impécablement entretenues, c'est parce que le Pape aime fréquenter des lieux sains.</span></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-8804369439970449571?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-40185900629093141592009-05-27T01:39:00.002+02:002009-05-29T21:37:57.798+02:00<div style="TEXT-ALIGN: left" align="left"><span style="font-size:180%;"><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">De par leur nature, les femmes ne seront jamais prêtres.<br /><br /></span><br /></span><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold"><span style="FONT-STYLE: italic"><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold"></span></span><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold"><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold"></span></span><br /></span></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-4018590062909314159?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-17906704177908363722009-05-21T22:13:00.001+02:002009-05-21T22:13:57.756+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Vieux motard que jamais.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em><br /></em><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-1790670417790836372?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-39787036362005437312009-05-15T01:08:00.000+02:002009-05-15T01:09:04.086+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Pas besoin d'être contorsionniste pour prendre son pied avec sa bite.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em><br /></em><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-3978703636200543731?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-84250247657607221492009-05-05T23:50:00.002+02:002009-05-15T01:07:44.704+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">C'est à table que Monet, incapable de manger</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;">proprement, eut l'idée de l'impressionnisme.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em><br /></em><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-8425024765760722149?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-50176257585418463272009-04-28T23:09:00.001+02:002009-05-09T23:44:58.092+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Je compense le fait d'avoir du travail en retard par celui d'avoir du sommeil d'avance.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-5017625758541846327?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-76511720520560249172009-04-21T23:50:00.001+02:002009-04-28T23:07:34.049+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Il ne faut jamais remettre au lendemain ce que l'on peut faire le jour même. Exception faite pour le suicide.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-7651172052056024917?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-75783400774119731702009-04-13T23:38:00.001+02:002009-04-21T23:48:25.158+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Méfiez-vous des apparences : ce que vous prenez pour un chameau est peut-être en fait un dromadaire bossu.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-7578340077411973170?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-25077525985526393092009-04-07T23:36:00.001+02:002009-04-13T23:27:26.765+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Il ne faut pas jeter le bébé avec l'eau du bain. Jetez-le séparément.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-2507752598552639309?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-82999323836677620182009-04-01T01:07:00.001+02:002009-04-01T01:09:33.467+02:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Si on te frappe sur la joue droite, tends la joue gauche. Si on te frappe aussi sur la joue gauche, au moins là tu ne pourras pas dire que tu ne l'as pas cherché.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Jésus-Christ</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em><br /></em><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-8299932383667762018?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-35972365462552611112009-03-26T23:41:00.000+01:002009-03-26T23:42:12.533+01:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Pour Hobbes, l'homme est un loup pour l'homme. Peut-être, mais en ce qui me concerne, je sors peu de ma tanière.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em><br /></em><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-3597236546255261111?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-4334106546455021662009-03-20T00:41:00.001+01:002009-03-20T00:41:25.745+01:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Certains pensent que Dieu est une invention des hommes. D'autres, que les hommes sont une invention de Dieu. Au moins, ils sont d'accord sur l'idée d'invention.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em><span style="font-size:85%;"><br /></span></em><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-433410654645502166?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-48832957775238990682009-03-14T05:19:00.002+01:002009-03-19T00:09:07.745+01:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Personnellement, jamais de schubert : ça me fait péter.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-4883295777523899068?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-89529868790237325662009-03-03T23:51:00.001+01:002009-03-14T04:31:23.748+01:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Les intégristes islamistes se croient tellement inspirés par un Dieu bon et miséricordieux qu'ils seraient prêts à égorger quiconque mettant son existence en doute.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-8952986879023732566?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-84526600005623295922009-02-25T23:45:00.001+01:002009-03-03T23:48:06.503+01:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Un jour, l'Amour a frappé à ma porte. Pas de bol, j'étais pas là.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-8452660000562329592?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-47859578389696284912009-02-17T23:45:00.001+01:002009-02-25T23:39:25.473+01:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Vous ne verrez jamais un membre du Ku Klux klan tirer sur un noir avec une balle à blanc.</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-4785957838969628491?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-72484110227746803662009-02-11T22:54:00.002+01:002009-02-17T23:38:45.478+01:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Tous les Grecs sont pédés. Or, je suis un Grec. Donc, je suis pédé.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"> ( Aristote )</span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-7248411022774680366?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-19756148252634773542009-02-05T23:41:00.002+01:002009-02-05T23:44:16.921+01:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Incapable de rester sourd à leurs attaques, Ludwig van Beethoven aimait à immobiliser ses détracteurs au sol à l'aide d'une clé. (Une clé de sol ?)</span></strong><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em></em><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:78%;"></span></strong><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-1975614825263477354?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-19531307692884901812009-01-30T10:43:00.000+01:002009-01-30T10:44:25.192+01:00<div align="left"><strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Rien de plus frustrant pour un pâtissier que de revoir avant de mourir sa vie en un éclair.</span></strong><br /><strong><span style="font-size:180%;"></span></strong><br /><em><span style="font-size:78%;"><br /></span></em></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-1953130769288490181?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31473125.post-30365757006839468582009-01-23T09:18:00.003+01:002009-01-28T09:17:16.920+01:00<strong><span style="font-size:180%;">Si l'Amazonie c'est les poumons de la terre, où est le trou du cul ?</span></strong><br /><div align="left"><strong><em><span style="font-size:78%;"><br /></span></em></strong></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/31473125-3036575700683946858?l=humour-humoristique.blogspot.com'/></div>H. M. Gillennoreply@blogger.com