One More Dying Quail

Reverse Survivor: Picking Your Moment

2009-11-23T21:21:00.003-05:00

After a three-point road loss to San Diego State on Halloween dropped New Mexico's record to 0-8 on the season, the team had to realize that it had backed itself into an almost inescapable corner. In stark contrast to the Lobos' nightmare campaign, the rest of the Mountain West is enjoying an exceptional season - of the team's four remaining opponents after that loss, three were nationally ranked (Utah, Brigham Young, and TCU).

Predictably, the Lobos of Locksley were blown out on the road by Utah, 45-14, to fall to 0-9. They surprised some people the next week, though, playing Brigham Young tough in a 24-19 loss. In fact, New Mexico probably should have walked away with the win, but its kicker, James Aho, had an awful day. Aho, a 20-year-old sophomore from Roswell, missed three field goals and an extra point, ten points that marked the difference between victory and defeat.

Fast forward to this week, New Mexico's last real chance to get themselves out of that corner. The opponent was Colorado State. The Rams won their first three games of the season, beating Colorado, Weber State, and Nevada, but a loss to Brigham Young on September 26 was the catalyst for a string of seven straight defeats. After the Rams, unbeaten and virtually untouchable TCU loomed on the horizon. Mike Locksley's pregame speech probably went something like, "Um, let's win this week, fellas. Because, um...let's just win this week."

Again, the game wasn't decided until the fourth quarter. Colorado State returned an interception early in the quarter for a 27-23 lead. Three minutes later, Aho nailed his second three-pointer the game to cut the margin to one. The Rams took the ball back and marched down the field, 67 yards in seven plays, six runs and a pass, all of them involving John Mosure. On the seventh play, from the New Mexico five, Mosure took the handoff, and fumbled. The Lobos took it 54 yards in under two minutes before being forced to punt, but the defense was invigorated. Mosure had carried the ball 24 times for 179 yards. He was handed the rock three times, gathered negative-two yards, and watched from the sidelines as Pete Kontodiakos launched a 27-yard punt.

Could there have been any doubt after that? Donovan Porterie took the ball with 1:32 on the clock and brought his team 35 yards in the next seventy seconds. With fifteen seconds left and the game on the line, who came onto the field to win it or lose it for New Mexico? James Aho, of course, who followed up the worst day of his football career with the best, nailing a 27-yarder to give his team its first win of the season, 29-27.

That's what Reverse Survivor is all about, folks - a bunch of guys who hadn't tasted victory all season (in thirteen months, actually, dating back to last season) working together to scratch and claw and fight and earn themselves a victory. I'm proud of them.

New Mexico's win leaves just two teams remaining in Reverse Survivor: Eastern Michigan and Western Kentucky. The Eagles (why are they not named the Emus?) travel to Akron on Friday afternoon for the season finale; the Hilltoppers get two more shots: Saturday at Florida Atlantic and the following Thursday on a short week against Arkansas State. Eastern Michigan is 2-20 against FBS opponents in the past two seasons; Western Kentucky has lost its last 24 games against FBS opponents (many of those while transitioning from Division 1AA/FCS), its last win coming over Middle Tennessee State on September 20, 2007.

(My favorite fact about Western Kentucky, aside from the fact that they won the 2002 Division 1AA national championship? They used to play West Virginia Tech, an NAIA school, every other year. The last three times the two teams met, when Western Kentucky was a national power and moving up a division, the combined score was 217-6. That's not a typo.)

By this time next week, we may have at least one Reverse Survivor champion. I leave you with Andrew's words of wisdom regarding the final two, possibly for the last time this season:

Eastern Michigan: Fun fact about their opponent's quarterback. His name is Pat Nicely, which is also how a Minnesota cop deals with a perp.

Western Kentucky: [Andrew is refusing to comment further on Western Kentucky due to the fact he's said all he can about the ineptitude of the Red Drink. They had their last best chance. See if you can't get yourself some three star recruits when you start over.]

Reverse Survivor: Special Teams Are Important

2009-11-15T10:34:00.004-05:00

We came incredibly close to having an overall winner this week, with one school winning its first game and two others putting themselves in good position for a W but falling just short.

Rice led Tulane heading into the fourth quarter, 21-14, when Ryan Griffin's third touchdown pass of the game for the Green Wave cut the score to 21-20. The kicker missed the extra point, however, and the Owls defense forced four-and-outs on two of Tulane's final three possessions to seal the win. Griffin's game-ending streak of ten consecutive incompletions notwithstanding, the game featured solid quarterback play: Griffin was 24-41 for 261 yards and three touchdowns, while Rice's Nick Fanuzzi was 15-24 for 214 yards and four touchdowns.

New Mexico and Western Kentucky both could have won but instead found themselves lamenting tight losses. The Hilltoppers held an 18-14 lead midway through the fourth quarter before Louisiana-Monroe scored a touchdown for the 21-18 win. The three point loss was made especially difficult by the fact that kicker Casey Tinius made four of his five field goal attempts - he missed a 46-yarder early, on the team's first drive, that ended up being the deciding score.

The Lobos had even worse luck with the kicking game. James Aho missed three field goals and an extra point, a ten-point swing that directly affected the outcome of the game. It doesn't make it any easier on New Mexico, but the tight game has to give them some confidence heading into the last two weeks against Colorado State and undefeated TCU.

Eastern Michigan (0-10, 0-6 Mid-American Conference West)

Last Game
November 14 – lost to Western Michigan, 35-14

Key Points
Points For/Against: 155/384
Average Margin of Defeat: 22.9 points
Worst Loss: 48 points (October 10 @ Central Michigan, 56-8)
Closest Loss: 2 points (October 24 vs. Ball State, 29-27)

Upcoming Schedule
November 20 (Fri) @ Toledo (4-6)
November 27 (Fri) @ Akron (2-8)

Andrew Says…
"I sympathize with Andre Hatchett. He's on a team with an offense that can't keep him off the field. He's got to play like he's the first level because of the poor defense. And fun fact? His last name is awesome. He deserves better."

New Mexico (0-10, 0-6 Mountain West Conference)

Last Game
November 7 – lost to Brigham Young, 24-19

Key Points
Points For/Against: 157/353
Average Margin of Defeat: 19.6 points
Worst Loss: 35 points (September 5 @ Texas A&M, 41-6)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 26 vs. New Mexico State, 20-17)

Upcoming Schedule
November 21 vs. Colorado State (3-7)
November 28 @ TCU (10-0)

Andrew Says…
"It all comes down to this. You either win this week or you tie for reverse surivor. Donovan Porterie? This is your must win game."

Western Kentucky (0-10, 0-6 Sun Belt Conference)

Last Game
November 14 – lost to Louisiana-Monroe, 21-18

Key Points
Points For/Against: 202/422
Average Margin of Defeat: 22.0 points
Worst Loss: 56 points (September 5 @ Tennessee, 63-7)
Closest Loss: 3 points (November 14 @ Louisiana-Monroe, 21-18)

Upcoming Schedule
November 28 @ Florida Atlantic (3-6)
December 3 (Thurs) vs. Arkansas State (2-7)

Andrew Says…
"If you are interested? Please contact the proprietor of this blog for a free Grape Job sticker for the noble effort you put out."

Reverse Survivor: Maintaining the Status Quo

2009-11-09T22:17:00.003-05:00

I had ample time yesterday to put the finishing touches on this week's Reverse Survivor and post it, but I never got around to it. Why? Karma knew that today would bring big, relevant news, I suppose.

Western Kentucky fired coach David Elson after a seven year run that included a 39-41 record and a move from Division 1-AA to Division 1-A. (Pop quiz: who knew that Western Kentucky won the Division 1-AA national championship in 2002? Anybody? I am amazed by this, and I've been following them for three years now.) Of course, that won-lost mark once stood at 39-24 before the Hilltoppers' embarked on their current 17-game losing streak. The latest came on Saturday, 40-20, to Troy. Like last week, they were tied at the half; like last week, they blew up in the second half to take the loss.

Nobody fell off the radar this week. Only Rice was close, with a narrow loss to the SMU Mustangs. The Owls have two more chances before a tough season finale against Houston. Their road pales in comparison to New Mexico's, however; the Lobos get to face Brigham Young and TCU in two of the season's final three weeks.

Rice (0-9, 0-5 Conference USA West)

Last Game
November 7 – lost to Southern Methodist, 31-28

Key Points
Points For/Against: 147/395
Average Margin of Defeat: 27.6 points
Worst Loss: 49 points (October 10 vs. Navy, 63-14))
Closest Loss: 3 points (November 7 @ Southern Methodist)

Upcoming Schedule
November 14 vs. Tulane (3-6)
November 21 vs. UTEP (3-6)
November 28 @ Houston (8-1)

Andrew Says…
"After Tulane held off the Buck-Ram of UTEP, they may be overconfident, but I doubt it."

Eastern Michigan (0-9, 0-5 Mid-American Conference West)

Last Game
November 5 – lost to Northern Illinois, 50-6

Key Points
Points For/Against: 141/349
Average Margin of Defeat: 23.1 points
Worst Loss: 48 points (October 10 @ Central Michigan, 56-8)
Closest Loss: 2 points (October 24 vs. Ball State, 29-27)

Upcoming Schedule
November 14 vs. Western Michigan (4-6)
November 20 (Fri) @ Toledo (4-5)
November 27 (Fri) @ Akron (2-7)

Andrew Says…
"Circle November 27th on your calendar. You have a team with reasonable expectations that has cratered. And this is your only shot to win. Because Akron broke really badly, see."

New Mexico (0-9, 0-5 Mountain West Conference)

Last Game
November 7 – lost to Utah, 45-14

Key Points
Points For/Against: 138/329
Average Margin of Defeat: 21.2 points
Worst Loss: 35 points (September 5 @ Texas A&M, 41-6)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 26 vs. New Mexico State, 20-17)

Upcoming Schedule
November 14 vs. Brigham Young (7-2)
November 21 vs. Colorado State (3-7)
November 28 @ TCU (9-0)

Andrew Says…
"Locksley better have negotiated a prohibitively expensive buyout clause. Because Year One was a firable offense. And Colorado State may be 3-7, but they have two weeks to prepare for this game. The Rams will give the Lobos their best."

Western Kentucky (0-9, 0-5 Sun Belt Conference)

Last Game
November 7 – lost to Troy, 40-20

Key Points
Points For/Against: 184/401
Average Margin of Defeat: 24.1 points
Worst Loss: 56 points (September 5 @ Tennessee, 63-7)
Closest Loss: 16 points (September 26 @ Navy, 28-12)

Upcoming Schedule
November 14 @ Louisiana-Monroe (5-4)
November 28 @ Florida Atlantic (2-6)
December 3 (Thurs) vs. Arkansas State (2-6)

Andrew Says…
"I do sympathize with David Elson, he subjected himself to an embarrassing viral video in an effort to get his fanbase hyped for 2009."

Reverse Survivor: Close, But No Cigar

2009-11-01T13:37:00.003-05:00

First order of business: Miami of Ohio.

There are teams that fit the Reverse Survivor mold year in and year out (Florida International), teams that may once have been national powers (Washington), and teams that never really seem to belong in the competition.

The RedHawks fit squarely into that third category. For whatever reason, it never felt like they were supposed to be here, with the Western Kentucky's and Eastern Michigan's and New Mexico's. And now, they're not, thanks to a 31-24 win over Toledo on Saturday. Zac Dysert led the way with over 400 yards of total offense (60 on the ground, 344 through the air) and Miami built a 24-7 lead by halftime. The Rockets put up 17 in the third quarter to close to within seven, but the fourth quarter was scoreless and the RedHawks held on for the win.

Miami almost had some company on its way off the door as Western Kentucky matched North Texas point for point through three quarters. In the end, though, the Mean Grean's offensive attack was too much, rolling up nineteen unanswered points in the fourth quarter en route to a video game-esque 68-49 romp. Quarterback Riley Dodge led the way with a remarkable seven total touchdowns - four through the air and three more on the ground.

New Mexico also came close before allowing a late touchdown that allowed San Diego State to walk away with the 23-20 win. The Lobos are in SERIOUS trouble - three of their last four opponents are nationally ranked, including the next two. They get Colorado State in three weeks, but matchups against 7-1 Utah and 6-2 Brigham Young might leave them 0-10 and in no mood to deal with the Rams.

Please note: Eastern Michigan plays on Thursday this week, against Northern Illinois.

Rice (0-8, 0-4 Conference USA West)

Last Game
October 24 – lost to UCF, 49-7

Key Points
Points For/Against: 119/364
Average Margin of Defeat: 30.6 points
Worst Loss: 49 points (October 10 vs. Navy, 63-14))
Closest Loss: 17 points (September 19 @ Oklahoma State, 41-24; October 3 vs. Tulsa, 27-10)
Offense: 299.1 YPG (211.4 passing, 87.8 rushing), 14 TD
Defense: 469.6 YPG (259.9 passing, 209.8 rushing), 46 TD

Upcoming Schedule
November 7 @ Southern Methodist
November 14 vs. Tulane
November 21 vs. UTEP
November 28 @ Houston

Andrew Says...
"They need to scare the would be freshman sensation Kyle Padron if they are to get away from Reverse Survivor."

Eastern Michigan (0-8, 0-4 Mid-American Conference West)

Last Game
October 31 – lost to Arkansas, 63-27

Key Points
Points For/Against: 135/299
Average Margin of Defeat: 20.5 points
Worst Loss: 48 points (October 10 @ Central Michigan, 56-8)
Closest Loss: 2 points (October 24 vs. Ball State, 29-27)
Offense: 275.6 YPG (151.8 passing, 123.9 rushing), 16 TD
Defense: 399.4 YPG (146.0 passing, 277.1 rushing), 37 TD

Upcoming Schedule
November 5 (Thurs) @ Northern Illinois
November 14 vs. Western Michigan
November 20 (Fri) @ Toledo
November 27 (Fri) @ Akron

Andrew Says...

"The fun fact about Eastern Michigan? Their 4th quarter touchdown allowed for a miraculous cover of the spread after being down 63-0."

New Mexico (0-8, 0-4 Mountain West Conference)

Last Game
October 31 – lost to San Diego State, 23-20

Key Points
Points For/Against: 124/284
Average Margin of Defeat: 20.0 points
Worst Loss: 35 points (September 5 @ Texas A&M, 41-6)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 26 vs. New Mexico State, 20-17)
Offense: 306.4 YPG (212.3 passing, 94.1 rushing), 12 TD
Defense: 413.5 YPG (252.4 passing, 161.1 rushing), 35 TD

Upcoming Schedule
November 7 @ Utah
November 14 vs. Brigham Young
November 21 vs. Colorado State
November 28 @ TCU

Andrew Says...
"The luckiest break of this nightmare season for the head coach? His buyout is too expensive for him to get fired for being the other winner of Reverse survivor, as well as his off-field tomfoolery."

Western Kentucky (0-8, 0-4 Sun Belt Conference)

Last Game
October 31 – lost to North Texas, 68-49

Key Points
Points For/Against: 164/361
Average Margin of Defeat: 24.6 points
Worst Loss: 56 points (September 5 @ Tennessee, 63-7)
Closest Loss: 16 points (September 26 @ Navy, 28-12)
Offense: 306.5 YPG (137.9 passing, 168.6 rushing), 22 TD
Defense: 518.1 YPG (245.3 passing, 273.1 rushing), 47 TD

Upcoming Schedule
November 7 vs. Troy
November 14 @ Louisiana-Monroe
November 28 @ Florida Atlantic
December 3 (Thurs) vs. Arkansas State

Andrew Says...
"Those of us suffering from depression need to take stock in the plight of the Red Drink. They show you your world could be worse."

Goodbye, Old Friend

2009-10-29T19:11:00.004-05:00

I hadn't talked to John Meredith in at least ten years, other than to exchange brief hellos at my friend Matt's college graduation, and I had no plans to speak to him again any time soon. But that still doesn't change the fact that for much of my freshman year of college, he was my best friend.

I can't remember exactly how or when Big John and I met at Western New England College in the fall of 1998. It was probably in the game room of Berkshire Hall, where we both lived, Big John on the third floor, me on the fourth. My roommate was a partier, I wasn't, and there wasn't anything to do in my room besides stare at the wall, so much of my free time was spent in the game room, with its wall-mounted television, vending machines, reasonably comfortable couches, and beat-up old pool table. John used to hang out there too, and it makes sense that I would've been drawn to the 6'6", 350-pound with the booming voice and generally cheerful demeanor.

We bonded over pizza, A-Plus, and Homicide. The local Domino's ran a special designed to bring in the college crowd - three large pizzas for $20, and the two of us would routinely call them up, head down to the game room, and wait. When they arrived, John and I would each grab one, racing to see who could finish it off first (I was ten inches shorter and 140 pounds lighter, but I held my own). The battle would inevitably end with both of us sitting there, holding our stomachs, wondering why we were doing this to ourselves...followed by John busting into a big smile as he lifted the top of the third box a few minutes later. We'd stay there into the early hours of the morning, or maybe take a walk over to the A-Plus convenience store, until Homicide (one of the finest shows, featuring one of the finest actors, Andre Braugher, on television) reruns came on at two a.m.

I attended my first live concert with Big John that year when he dragged me to a country show in Worcester, it must've been, with one of his visiting friends from back home in New York. The Dixie Chicks and another artist opened for Clay Walker, if I'm remembering it right, and one of the solo acts surprised me by climbing into the seats, right there among the fans. We sat to the right of the stage and had a pretty good view. Despite my general distaste for most country music, I had a good time.

John was also indirectly responsible for the history degree I eventually received from the University of New Hampshire in 2003. He was a government major from the beginning (his ultimate life goal was to be President of the United States) and I had sort of fallen into general business, but as freshmen we both had to work on our general education requirements. John decided to take a history class and suggested that I join him. The teacher, John Baick, was so engaging and presented the subject matter in such a regimented manner (every class started with an outline on the board for notes) that it wasn't long before I realized that history, not business, was where I wanted to be.

And that wasn't all that John helped with in that class. It was held relatively early, twice a week at 9:30 a.m., and I am most certainly not a morning person (yet every job I've had for the past six years has required me to be to work before 9 a.m. Go figure). So before every class, John would come up to the fourth floor and bang on my door until I woke up. It wasn't always as easy as it sounds: I clearly remember one time when I woke up to his insistent knock and realized that I had overslept; jumped out of bed and into some clean clothes; realized that John had already left and and ran for class on my own. Once there, I sarcastically thanked him for waiting for me - he informed me that he had pounded on my door for fifteen minutes, raising the ire of my neighbors, before leaving so he wouldn't be too late. Whoops.

Over time, John and I stopped hanging out. I don't know exactly why - we just did. And aside from one time last year when I randomly Googled him to see what he was up to these days (surprise - he was involved in local politics), I honestly hadn't thought about my old friend very often.

Today, though, I was looking through status updates on Facebook when I saw something that Dan Wystepek, another WNEC classmate, had posted: " John "Big John" Meredith...RIP...you'll always be remembered! 11-14-79 to 10-26-09". A lot of people had commented already, and reading through some links, some details came out: John had recently been diagnosed with a brain tumor, got sick just before a scheduled surgery to relieve pressure on his brain, and died on Monday.

I couldn't believe it when I heard, and I'm still having a hard time with it. The news of John's death makes me think of the good times we shared, all those years ago, and it's sad to think that he's really gone.

Reverse Survivor: The Game of the Century

2009-10-26T18:37:00.004-05:00

Big-time college football is all about its big games. "Game of the Week"..."Game of the Year"..."Game of the Decade"..."Game of the Century"..."Game of the Millennium"...and that's just this season.

Well, it's no stretch to suggest that Reverse Survivor had it's "Game of the FOR-EV-ER" this weekend when the Ball State Cardinals and Eastern Michigan Eagles squared off in Ypsilanti. The Eagles led 20-13 at halftime and extended that to 27-13 early in the third quarter, but Ball State scored the final 16 points of the game, all in the third quarter, to eke out a 29-27 win.

The numbers behind the final score were the best part of the game by far, however. Ball State quarterback Tanner Justice completed just two of ten passes for a total of one yard (one completion went for eight yards, the other for minus seven). Fortunately, the running backs were there to pick up the slack: MiQuale Lewis carried 26 times for 301 yards and a touchdown and Cory Sykes carried 23 times for 203 yards and three scores. And, not to be outdone, the special teams unit blocked a punt that went out of the end zone for a safety that ended up being the final margin of victory.

This week's Almost Game of the Century comes from the Sun Belt Conference, as winless Western Kentucky travels to Denton, Texas to take on the 1-6 Mean Green of the University of North Texas. The Hilltoppers better hope they can take advantage of the Green's generous defense - this could be their last chance at a victory for a long, long time.

Rice (0-8, 0-4 Conference USA West)

Last Game
October 24 – lost to UCF, 49-7

Key Points
Points For/Against: 119/364
Average Margin of Defeat: 30.6 points
Worst Loss: 49 points (October 10 vs. Navy, 63-14))
Closest Loss: 17 points (September 19 @ Oklahoma State, 41-24; October 3 vs. Tulsa, 27-10)
Offense: 299.1 YPG (211.4 passing, 87.8 rushing), 14 TD
Defense: 469.6 YPG (259.9 passing, 209.8 rushing), 46 TD

Upcoming Schedule
November 7 @ Southern Methodist
November 14 vs. Tulane
November 21 vs. UTEP
November 28 @ Houston

Andrew Says...
"Poor Robert Calhoun, he is alone with crap surrounding him. And they are exploiting his non-suck with an overpriced replica jersey."

Miami of Ohio (0-8, 0-4 Mid-American Conference East)

Last Game
October 24 – lost to Northern Illinois, 27-22

Key Points
Points For/Against: 93/275
Average Margin of Defeat: 22.8 points
Worst Loss: 48 points (September 12 @ Boise State, 48-0)
Closest Loss: 5 points (October 24 vs. Northern Illinois, 27-22)
Offense: 316.0 YPG (244.6 passing, 71.4 rushing), 13 TD
Defense: 370.3 YPG (193.1 passing, 177.1 rushing), 33 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 31 vs. Toledo
November 5 (Thurs) @ Temple
November 12 (Thurs) vs. Bowling Green
November 18 (Wed) vs. Buffalo

Andrew Says...
"Fun Fact, their Kick Returner is named Lucas Swift. He is not."

Eastern Michigan (0-7, 0-4 Mid-American Conference West)

Last Game
October 24 – lost to Ball State, 29-27

Key Points
Points For/Against: 108/236
Average Margin of Defeat: 18.3 points
Worst Loss: 48 points (October 10 @ Central Michigan, 56-8)
Closest Loss: 2 points (October 24 vs. Ball State, 29-27)
Offense: 265.3 YPG (136.4 passing, 128.9 rushing), 12 TD
Defense: 399.4 YPG (124.4 passing, 275.0 rushing), 30 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 31 @ Arkansas
November 5 (Thurs) @ Northern Illinois
November 14 vs. Western Michigan
November 20 (Fri) @ Toledo
November 27 (Fri) @ Akron

Andrew Says...
"If Ball State can run you over? The Bobby Petrino Supersystem will eat your babies."

New Mexico (0-7, 0-3 Mountain West Conference)

Last Game
October 24 – lost to UNLV, 34-17

Key Points
Points For/Against: 104/261
Average Margin of Defeat: 22.4 points
Worst Loss: 35 points (September 5 @ Texas A&M, 41-6)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 26 vs. New Mexico State, 20-17)
Offense: 295.0 YPG (203.0 passing, 92.0 rushing), 10 TD
Defense: 429.3 YPG (252.3 passing, 177.0 rushing), 32 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 31 @ San Diego State
November 7 @ Utah
November 14 vs. Brigham Young
November 21 vs. Colorado State
November 28 @ TCU

Andrew Says...
"I can't see how they win. I just can't."

Western Kentucky (0-7, 0-3 Sun Belt Conference)

Last Game
October 24 – lost to Middle Tennessee, 62-24

Key Points
Points For/Against: 115/293
Average Margin of Defeat: 25.4 points
Worst Loss: 56 points (September 5 @ Tennessee, 63-7)
Closest Loss: 16 points (September 26 @ Navy, 28-12)
Offense: 289.6 YPG (137.0 passing, 152.6 rushing), 15 TD
Defense: 509.1 YPG (242.9 passing, 266.3 rushing), 38 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 31 @ North Texas
November 7 vs. Troy
November 14 @ Louisiana-Monroe
November 28 @ Florida Atlantic
December 3 (Thurs) vs. Arkansas State

Andrew Says...
"I sympathize, Dwight Dasher is an awesome name for a dual threat QB. I would not want to stop him either."

Reverse Survivor: Farewell, Fighting Schnellenbergers

2009-10-21T17:56:00.004-05:00

We've moved past the point in the Reverse Survivor cycle where multiple teams are removed weekly and into the time of year where maybe one or two teams a week earn a win and exit the competition.

This week's departure was Florida Atlantic, Andrew's Fighting Schnellenbergers, which pulled off a wild 44-40 road win over conference rival North Texas. The Owls trailed 19-7 before pulling a Tom Brady and scoring 30 unanswered points to take a 37-19 lead. Fortunately, the defense was willing to make a game of it, allowing the Mean Green to go on a 21-0 run of their own. Florida Atlantic came right back, however, scoring the deciding touchdown with less than two minutes to play.

Alfred Morris had 147 yards and two touchdowns, including the game-winner, for Florida Atlantic. North Texas's Lance Dunbar ran for 238 and three scores.

Another team is guaranteed to leave Reverse Survivor next week following the matchup between Ball State and Eastern Michigan. And against Western Kentucky in ten days, North Texas could impact the competition for the third time: in addition to last Saturday's loss, the Mean Green opened the season with a win against Ball State against Ball State.

Rice (0-7, 0-3 Conference USA West)

Last Game
October 17 – lost to East Carolina, 49-13

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 29 points
Worst Loss: 49 points (October 10 vs. Navy, 63-14))
Closest Loss: 17 points (September 19 @ Oklahoma State, 41-24; October 3 vs. Tulsa, 27-10)
Offense: 301.6 YPG (216.1 passing, 85.4 rushing), 13 TD
Defense: 470.3 YPG (261.0 passing, 209.3 rushing), 40 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 24 vs. UCF
October 31 BYE
November 7 @ Southern Methodist
November 14 vs. Tulane
November 21 vs. UTEP
November 28 @ Houston

Andrew Says...
”They should call James Casey the rat, because he sensed a sinking ship.”

Miami of Ohio (0-7, 0-3 Mid-American Conference East)

Last Game
October 17 – lost to Ohio, 28-7

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 25.3 points
Worst Loss: 48 points (September 12 @ Boise State, 48-0)
Closest Loss: 10 points (September 26 @ Kent State, 29-19; October 10 @ Northwestern, 16-6)
Offense: 313.0 YPG (229.9 passing, 83.1 rushing), 10 TD
Defense: 385.7 YPG (212.1 passing, 173.6 rushing), 31 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 24 vs. Northern Illinois
October 31 vs. Toledo
November 5 (Thurs) @ Temple
November 12 (Thurs) vs. Bowling Green
November 18 (Wed) vs. Buffalo

Andrew Says...
”Could very well go into their final game needing a win to get off the Reverse Survivor.”

Ball State (0-7, 0-3 Mid-American Conference West)

Last Game
October 17 – lost to Bowling Green, 34-17

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 10.6 points
Worst Loss: 24 points (September 26 @ Auburn, 54-30)
Closest Loss: 5 points (October 10 @ Temple, 24-19)
Offense: 296.4 YPG (174.9 passing, 121.6 rushing), 14 TD
Defense: 412.1 YPG (253.7 passing, 158.4 rushing), 26 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 24 @ Eastern Michigan
October 31 vs. Ohio
November 12 (Thurs) @ Northern Illinois
November 18 (Wed) vs. Central Michigan
November 24 (Tues) @ Western Michigan

Andrew Says...
”More like Ball Suck.”

Eastern Michigan (0-6, 0-3 Mid-American Conference West)

Last Game
October 17 – lost to Kent State, 28-6

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 21 points
Worst Loss: 48 points (October 10 @ Central Michigan, 56-8)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 12 @ Northwestern, 27-24)
Offense: 269.7 YPG (144.8 passing, 124.8 rushing), 9 TD
Defense: 388.7 YPG (145.0 passing, 243.7 rushing), 26 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 24 vs. Ball State
October 31 @ Arkansas
November 5 (Thurs) @ Northern Illinois
November 14 vs. Western Michigan
November 20 (Fri) @ Toledo
November 27 (Fri) @ Akron

Andrew Says...
”I think this is the week they say good bye.”

New Mexico (0-5, 0-1 Mountain West Conference)

Last Game
October 17 - Idle

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 23.3
Worst Loss: 35 points (September 5 @ Texas A&M, 41-6)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 26 vs. New Mexico State, 20-17)
Offense: 296.3 YPG (200.3 pass, 96.0 run), 8 TD
Defense: 430.3 YPG (258.8 pass, 171.5 run), 28 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 24 vs. UNLV
October 31 @ San Diego State
November 7 @ Utah
November 14 vs. Brigham Young
November 21 vs. Colorado State
November 28 @ TCU

Andrew Says...
”This is the circle the wagon game. If don't beat UNLV? They're in trouble.”

Western Kentucky (0-6, 0-2 Sun Belt Conference)

Last Game
October 17 – lost to Louisiana-Lafayette, 30-22

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat:
Worst Loss: 56 points (September 5 @ Tennessee, 63-7)
Closest Loss: 16 points (September 26 @ Navy, 28-12)
Offense: 296.2 YPG (134.8 passing, 161.3 rushing), 12 TD
Defense: 486.3 YPG (213.8 passing, 272.5 rushing), 30 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 24 @ Middle Tennessee
October 31 @ North Texas
November 7 vs. Troy
November 14 @ Louisiana-Monroe
November 28 @ Florida Atlantic
December 3 (Thurs) vs. Arkansas State

Andrew Says...
”They gave a noble effort, but the fact of the matter is there isn't a game that you would not feel right stunned of they even lost by 7 the rest of the way.”

Reverse Survivor: Farewell, Golden Panthers

2009-10-11T16:52:00.005-05:00

Every year, at least two Reverse Survivor contenders emerge from the Sun Belt Conference. This time around was no different - as we entered the weekend, three of the remaining eight teams were Sun Belt representatives. Florida Atlantic had the week off and so was guaranteed to fight another week; the other two, inaugural co-winner Florida International and perennial contender Western Kentucky, were slated to square off in an epic battle for supremacy on Saturday.

It was a close game into the second half - 17-14 after Western Kentucky's Kawaun Jakes ran one in from ten yards out about three and a half minutes into the third quarter. Just about ninety seconds later, however, Jason Frierson reeled in a forty-yard touchdown from Paul McCall, the first of twenty straight points for the Golden Panthers.

And so, thanks to that magnificent second-half rally, we say goodbye to the Florida International Golden Panthers. If not for that magical first Reverse Survivor season in which they shared the championship with Duke, they would be the epitome of the phrase, "Always the bridesmaid, never the bride."

Seven teams are left at the end of six weeks, including two from the Sun Belt. All except New Mexico will be in action next week, and the potentially important matchup between Ball State and Eastern Michigan remains intact for another week.

Once again, the esteemed Andrew was kind enough to contribute his thoughts on each team.

1. Rice (0-6, 0-2 Conference USA West)

Last Game
October 10 - lost to Navy, 63-14

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 27.8
Worst Loss: 49 points (October 10 vs. Navy, 63-14))
Closest Loss: 17 points (September 19 @ Oklahoma State, 41-24; October 3 vs. Tulsa, 27-10)
Offense: 295.0 YPG (208.3 pass, 86.7 run), 12 TD
Defense: 472.2 YPG (256.8 pass, 215.3 run), 34 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 17 @ East Carolina
October 24 vs. UCF
October 31 BYE
November 7 @ Southern Methodist
November 14 vs. Tulane
November 21 vs. UTEP
November 28 @ Houston

Andrew Says...
"It's the Northwestern of the South. Without all the seven win seasons."

2. Miami of Ohio (0-6, 0-2 Mid-American Conference East)

Last Game
October 10 - lost to Northwestern, 16-6

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 26.0
Worst Loss: 48 points (September 12 @ Boise State, 48-0)
Closest Loss: 10 points (September 26 @ Kent State, 29-19; October 10 @ Northwestern, 16-6)
Offense: 328.8 YPG (240.5 pass, 88.3 run), 9 TD
Defense: 383.7 YPG (218.8 pass, 164.8 run), 27 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 17 @ Ohio
October 24 vs. Northern Illinois
October 31 vs. Toledo
November 5 (Thurs) @ Temple
November 12 (Thurs) vs. Bowling Green
November 18 (Wed) vs. Buffalo

Andrew Says...
"Daniel Rudabaugh has a vaguely herbivorish surname. Apparently, his game's gone vegetable too."

3. Ball State (0-6, 0-2 Mid-American Conference West)

Last Game
October 10 - lost to Temple, 24-19

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 10
Worst Loss: 24 points (September 26 @ Auburn, 54-30)
Closest Loss: 5 points (October 10 @ Temple, 24-19)
Offense: 278.5 YPG (182.2 pass, 96.3 run), 12 TD
Defense: 405.0 YPG (233.3 pass, 171.7 run), 22 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 17 vs. Bowling Green
October 24 @ Eastern Michigan
October 31 vs. Ohio
November 12 (Thurs) @ Northern Illinois
November 18 (Wed) vs. Central Michigan
November 24 (Tues) @ Western Michigan

Andrew Says...
"The team decided that they would not give most famous alumnus David Letterman any aid or comfort."

4. Eastern Michigan (0-5, 0-2 Mid-American Conference West)

Last Game
October 10 - lost to Central Michigan, 56-8

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 20.8
Worst Loss: 48 points (October 10 @ Central Michigan, 56-8)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 12 @ Northwestern, 27-24)
Offense: 272.6 YPG (158.8 pass, 113.8 run), 9 TD
Defense: 397.0 YPG (135.0 pass, 262.0 run), 22 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 17 vs. Kent State
October 24 vs. Ball State
October 31 @ Arkansas
November 5 (Thurs) @ Northern Illinois
November 14 vs. Western Michigan
November 20 (Fri) @ Toledo
November 27 (Fri) @ Akron

Andrew Says...
"I get the sense that I could run for 15 carries and 61 yards with a touchdown off their rush defense."

5. New Mexico (0-5, 0-1 Mountain West Conference)

Last Game
October 10 - lost to Wyoming, 37-13

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 23.3
Worst Loss: 35 points (September 5 @ Texas A&M, 41-6)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 26 vs. New Mexico State, 20-17)
Offense: 296.3 YPG (200.3 pass, 96.0 run), 8 TD
Defense: 430.3 YPG (258.8 pass, 171.5 run), 28 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 24 vs. UNLV
October 31 @ San Diego State
November 7 @ Utah
November 14 vs. Brigham Young
November 21 vs. Colorado State
November 28 @ TCU

Andrew Says...
"Hey, remember how that 4-2-5 setup always managed to stop people? Good looking out on changing that up."

6. Western Kentucky (0-5, 0-1 Sun Belt Conference)

Last Game
October 10 - lost to Florida International, 37-20

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 26.4
Worst Loss: 56 points (September 5 @ Tennessee, 63-7)
Closest Loss: 16 points (September 26 @ Navy, 28-12)
Offense: 293.8 YPG (133.6 pass, 160.2 run), 9 TD
Defense: 496.8 YPG (215.8 pass, 281.0 run), 27 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 17 vs. Louisiana-Lafayette
October 24 @ Middle Tennessee
October 31 @ North Texas
November 7 vs. Troy
November 14 @ Louisiana-Monroe
November 28 @ Florida Atlantic
December 3 (Thurs) vs. Arkansas State

Andrew Says...
"A long time ago, the Red Drank decided to sell his soul for his school to become a success at a major sport. He now takes the form you see now, and marks time for basketball season."

7. Florida Atlantic (0-4, 0-1 Sun Belt Conference)

Last Game
October 3 - lost to Wyoming, 30-28

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 18
Worst Loss: 46 (September 5 @ Nebraska, 49-3)
Closest Loss: 2 points (September 26 vs. Louisiana-Monroe, 27-25; October 3 vs. Wyoming, 30-28)
Offense: 384.3 YPG (263.8 pass, 120.5 run), 8 TD
Defense: 447.8 YPG (222.5 pass, 225.3 run), 19 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 17 @ North Texas
October 24 @ Louisiana-Lafayette
October 31 vs. Middle Tennessee
November 7 @ UAB
November 14 vs. Arkansas State
November 21 @ Troy
November 28 vs. Western Kentucky
December 5 @ Florida International

Andrew Says...
"I stand by my previous bold statement in regards to the fighting Schnellenbergers."

Games That Might Be Important This Season
October 24 – Ball State @ Eastern Michigan
November 28 – Western Kentucky @ Florida Atlantic

Just For Kicks, Let's Play NFL Reverse Survivor

2009-10-08T22:48:00.004-05:00

A word of warning: every post here for the next few months could be Reverse Survivor-related. Not saying they WILL be...it's just entirely possible.

I got this idea the other night after finishing up the regular Reverse Survivor post. Looking at the NFL standings, it became clear that with 25% of the season in the books, there was something happening here. That "something" was six winless teams in five divisions. And one of them isn't the Detroit Lions (who should have this award named after them). Good for them!

The six winless teams through four weeks are:

Cleveland Browns (AFC North): 0-4
Tennessee Titans (AFC South): 0-4
Kansas City Chiefs (AFC West): 0-4
Carolina Panthers (NFC South): 0-3
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (NFC South): 0-4
St. Louis Rams (NFC West): 0-4

The Titans and Panthers, both playoff teams with 12+ wins last season, appear to be the two things that don't belong. They won't make the playoffs, but they shouldn't be completely horrendous over the last twelve games, either. There's a lot of football left to play. Plenty of time to finish up respectably.

The other four, however? Wheeeeew. They be bad. Cleveland and Tampa Bay have new coaches and offenses that don't seem to be working out, St. Louis is averaging six points per game (the inept Browns have scored as many points this season), and Kansas City? I have no words for Kansas City. Joe Posnanski has written that they're really bad, if I recall, so I'm gonna combine that with the 0-4 record and mark it down as a fact.

Only one thing stands in the way of some of these teams: the schedule. There are thee games scheduled between current Reverse Survivor competitors, meaning a maximum of three teams can go winless in 2009:

October 18: Carolina @ Tampa Bay
December 13: St. Louis @ Tennessee
December 20: Cleveland @ Kansas City

In addition, several of the remaining teams have games against Oakland and Detroit. My guess is we're gonna have about eight teams that finish 2-14. Whoever wants this is really gonna have to fight for it.

Reverse Survivor: The Return

2009-10-05T18:24:00.005-05:00

I can't deny that my regular production at One More Dying Quail has fallen off greatly in recent months. Where I once used to post at least an item a day (and often more), I now post approximately one or two items a month (unless that month is September, when I posted nothing at all).

The primary cause of this is my work at Bus Leagues Baseball, where we focus on minor league baseball. I like the focus that derives from writing about a single topic, the feeling that even though you are limiting yourself to one segment of one sport, there is always something to write about. And minor league baseball is fun. If the majors are the stuffy, college-educated, career-driven older brother, then the minors are the long-haired, motorcycle-riding, fly-by-the-seat-of-his-pants younger sibling. Major League Baseball is supposed to be capitalized; minor league baseball looks best when it isn't.

But I digress. This post isn't about my recent production. It's not about baseball of the Major League or minor league varieties (although Jayson Stark did have a column today in which he mentioned Joe Girardi, Ron Gardenhire, and Don Wakamatsu as runners-up for his Manager of the Year award while completely leaving out Terry Francona; you're telling me Tito wasn't one of the AL's Top Four managers this season? Puh-lease). And it's not about the NFL in general or the Patriots in particular.

No, this post is about college football, Reverse Survivor, one of the ideas that truly defines One More Dying Quail.

If you're new here, the idea behind Reverse Survivor (a term coined by old friend Eric Angevine, editor of college basketball blog Storming the Floor, which will welcome the competition for the second time this season) is to celebrate mediocrity by tracking college football's winless teams, week-by-week, until only one is remaining. That team "wins" the competition, ironically, by not winning at all.

(In years past, I've used victories over FBS opponents as an additional deciding factor; a team could therefore win a game against an FCS opponent and still be eligible for the Reverse Survivor trophy (note: there is no Reverse Survivor trophy). This year, though, I've scrapped that. It just causes too much trouble, adds too much confusion later in the season, and quite frankly, takes a lot of the fun away. No one wants to see a Reverse Survivor winner with one or two wins. We want to be able to say that the last team to win a game - any game - is the official winner.)

After five weeks, there are eight contenders for the 2009 College Football Reverse Survivor title (anyone who has read past installments will recognize at least a couple of the schools involved). I've put together a handy little primer below to better help us all know what we're dealing with as we head into Week Six. And as an added bonus, I've enlisted the immortal Andrew Rosin of Grand National Championships and SEC Football Blogger fame (who knows far more about these teams than I do) to give a brief rundown of each team.

1. Rice (0-5, 0-2 Conference USA West)

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 23.6
Worst Loss: 45 points (September 12 @ Texas Tech, 55-10)
Closest Loss: 17 points (September 19 @ Oklahoma State, 41-24; October 3 vs. Tulsa, 27-10)
Offense: 299.6 YPG (199.8 pass, 99.8 run), 10 TD
Defense: 459.2 YPG (295.0 pass, 164.2 run), 25 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 10 vs. Navy
October 17 @ East Carolina
October 24 vs. UCF
October 31 BYE
November 7 @ Southern Methodist
November 14 vs. Tulane
November 21 vs. UTEP
November 28 @ Houston

Andrew Says...
"A dropoff was expected after the graduation of Chase Clement and Jarrett Dillard. But letting Vandy put up 36 on you does not bode well."

2. Miami of Ohio (0-5, 0-2 Mid-American Conference East)

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 29.2
Worst Loss: 48 points (September 12 @ Boise State, 48-0)
Closest Loss: 10 points (September 26 @ Kent State, 29-19)
Offense: 334.2 YPG (253.4 pass, 80.8 run), 8 TD
Defense: 396.6 YPG (224.4 pass, 172.2 run), 25 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 10 @ Northwestern
October 17 @ Ohio
October 24 vs. Northern Illinois
October 31 vs. Toledo
November 5 (Thurs) @ Temple
November 12 (Thurs) vs. Bowling Green
November 18 (Wed) vs. Buffalo

Andrew Says...
"Earl Blaik is rolling over in his grave."

3. Ball State (0-5, 0-1 Mid-American Conference West)

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 11
Worst Loss: 24 points (September 26 @ Auburn, 54-30)
Closest Loss: 7 points (September 12 vs. New Hampshire, 23-16; September 19 @ Army, 24-17; October 3 vs. Toledo, 37-30)
Offense: 276.2 YPG (171.2 pass, 105 run), 10 TD
Defense: 427.6 YPG (242.8 pass, 184.8 run), 19 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 10 @ Temple
October 17 vs. Bowling Green
October 24 @ Eastern Michigan
October 31 vs. Ohio
November 12 (Thurs) @ Northern Illinois
November 18 (Wed) vs. Central Michigan
November 24 (Tues) @ Western Michigan

Andrew Says...
"Useless. Simply useless. Tanner Justice is the worst superhero ever."

4. Eastern Michigan (0-4, 0-1 Mid-American Conference West)

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 14
Worst Loss: 28 points (September 19 @ Michigan, 45-17)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 12 @ Northwestern, 27-24)
Offense: 277 YPG (166.8 pass, 110.3 run), 8 TD
Defense: 366 YPG (89.3 pass, 276.8 run), 15 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 10 @ Central Michigan
October 17 vs. Kent State
October 24 vs. Ball State
October 31 @ Arkansas
November 5 (Thurs) @ Northern Illinois
November 14 vs. Western Michigan
November 20 (Fri) @ Toledo
November 27 (Fri) @ Akron

Andrew Says...
"Actually has a pretty good offense. The defense is useless. But the offense will keep them from a complete winless season."

5. New Mexico (0-5, 0-1 Mountain West Conference)

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 23.2
Worst Loss: 35 points (September 5 @ Texas A&M, 41-6)
Closest Loss: 3 points (September 26 vs. New Mexico State, 20-17)
Offense: 295.8 YPG (190 pass, 105.8 run), 7 TD
Defense: 434.2 YPG (264.2 pass, 170 run), 23 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 10 @ Wyoming
October 24 vs. UNLV
October 31 @ San Diego State
November 7 @ Utah
November 14 vs. Brigham Young
November 21 vs. Colorado State
November 28 @ TCU

Andrew Says...
"I'd be Assaulting some people too if I was stuck in New Mexico."

6. Florida International (0-4, 0-1 Sun Belt Conference)

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 14.25
Worst Loss: 26 points (September 12 @ Alabama, 40-14)
Closest Loss: 8 points (September 19 @ Rutgers, 23-15)
Offense: 309.3 YPG (243.2 pass, 67.0 run), 12 TD
Defense: 513.3 YPG (272.8 pass, 240.5 run), 17 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 10 @ Western Kentucky
October 17 vs. Troy
October 24 @ Arkansas State
October 31 vs. Louisiana-Lafayette
November 7 @ Middle Tennessee
November 14 vs. North Texas
November 21 @ Florida
December 5 vs. Florida Atlantic

Andrew Says...
"They play Western Kentucky this week. Forget you ever heard of them."

7. Western Kentucky (0-4, 0-0 Sun Belt Conference)

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 28.75
Worst Loss: 56 points (September 5 @ Tennessee, 63-7)
Closest Loss: 16 points (September 26 @ Navy, 28-12)
Offense: 272.0 YPG (137.5 pass, 134.5 run), 6 TD
Defense: 499.5 YPG (199.8 pass, 299.8 run), 23 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 10 vs. Florida International
October 17 vs. Louisiana-Lafayette
October 24 @ Middle Tennessee
October 31 @ North Texas
November 7 vs. Troy
November 14 @ Louisiana-Monroe
November 28 @ Florida Atlantic
December 3 (Thurs) vs. Arkansas State

Andrew Says...
"Will win Reverse Survivor."

8. Florida Atlantic (0-4, 0-1 Sun Belt Conference)

Key Points
Average Margin of Defeat: 18
Worst Loss: 46 (September 5 @ Nebraska, 49-3)
Closest Loss: 2 points (September 26 vs. Louisiana-Monroe, 27-25; October 3 vs. Wyoming, 30-28)
Offense: 384.3 YPG (263.8 pass, 120.5 run), 8 TD
Defense: 447.8 YPG (222.5 pass, 225.3 run), 19 TD

Upcoming Schedule
October 17 @ North Texas
October 24 @ Louisiana-Lafayette
October 31 vs. Middle Tennessee
November 7 @ UAB
November 14 vs. Arkansas State
November 21 @ Troy
November 28 vs. Western Kentucky
December 5 @ Florida International

Andrew Says...
"I will give you a bold prediction: the dapper Howard Schnellenberger will lead professional level quarterback Rusty Smith to a bowl game."

Games That Might Be Important This Season
October 10 – Florida International @ Western Kentucky
October 24 – Ball State @ Eastern Michigan
November 28 – Western Kentucky @ Florida Atlantic
December 5 – Florida Atlantic @ Florida International

My Favorite Movie Quotes, Volume 24

2009-08-15T01:47:00.002-05:00

3:10 to Yuma (2007)

Some critics found the father-son stuff to be the weakest part of 3:10 to Yuma. As both a father and a son, I thought it interesting. It's one of those little things you find yourself worrying about while lying awake at three in the morning: what is my boy going to think of me when he grows up and is old enough to decide for himself whether or not I'm full of crap?

Earlier scenes in the movie showed that while Dan's younger son still had that "hero worship" view of his father, the older boy, William, harbored no such illusions. Not only does he resent his father and the way people treat him, but Dan is painfully aware of William's feelings and the fact that he can do nothing to change things...except steadfastly refuse to quit until the job he signed up for is finished.

Dan Evans: I'm gonna be a day behind you, William. Unless something happens, and if it does, I need a man at the ranch to run things, protect our family, and I know that you can do that because you've become a fine man, William. You've become a fine man. You got all the best parts of me. What few there are.
[Dan shakes William's hand]
Dan Evans: And you just remember that your old man walked Ben Wade to that station when nobody else would.

Birthers Are Hilarious

2009-08-06T16:19:00.003-05:00

I forget where I originally saw the link to this Salon.com article - it seems like something The Big Lead would have had, but I'm not sure - but I would love to shake the hand of the person who posted it, because through that link I was able to click through to WND.com.

And WND.com is pure comedy gold.

I don't think they meant for it to be that way. I think they're trying to be at the forefront of the "BARACK OBAMA IS NOT AN AMERICAN CITIZEN!" movement. Hey, it's a free country. You wanna believe that Barack Obama isn't a citizen, knock yourself out. I'll even let you try to convince me of the same. If you do try to convince me, however, it would probably be best to make sense while doing so.

WND is nice enough to list a bunch of related stories at the end of articles on a specific topic, so I checked out a few of their entries on the Obama citizenship issue. These three were my favorites:

Mr. President, we have a problem (July 22): The basic premise of this article was that President said, in his remarks during a gathering to celebrate the 40th anniversary of the Apollo 11 moon landing, that he remembered being in Hawaii and watching the capsules splash down after the mission was complete. But (gasp!), Obama lived in Indonesia from 1967 to 1971; Apollo 11 landed on the moon in 1969; he could not have seen these events take place while living in Hawaii. Take that, El Presidente!

One thing immediately jumped out at me: as far as I can tell, Obama never said that he was talking about that specific landing, but about the Apollo missions in general. From WND:

The country continues to draw inspiration from what you've done. I should note, just personally, I grew up in Hawaii, as many of you know, and I still recall sitting on my grandfather's shoulders when those capsules would land in the middle of the Pacific and they'd get brought back and we'd go out and we'd pretend like they could see us as we were waving at folks coming home. And I remember waving American flags and my grandfather telling me that the Apollo mission was an example of how Americans can do anything they put their minds to.

It's that second sentence - "...when those capsules would land in the middle of the Pacific..." If he was talking about Apollo 11, wouldn't he have said, "...when those capsules landed in the middle of the Pacific..."? The use of "would land" denotes, to me, that he was talking about multiple missions that he might have witnessed.

Even so, that leads to the first problem: the first manned Apollo mission launched in 1968, while Obama was in Indonesia. So clearly, the president was lying to cover up something from his past, right?

Um, no. Probably not. Apollo 7 didn't launch until October 1968, but it wasn't the first manned American space flight - there were a whole crapload of Gemini missions in the mid-1960s. It is possible that Obama remembered watching these astronauts return to Earth and mistakenly believed that they were from the Apollo missions. It WAS 40+ years ago.

Wikipedia says Obama born in Kenya (July 12): This one is my favorite because it starts by reporting that Wikipedia has Obama listed as being born in either Hawaii or Kenya before going on to break down, update-by-update, all the changes that had been made to the president's entry.

Joe Kovacs notes in the beginning of his story that Wikipedia is a "free, online encyclopedia written and edited entirely by its users." Right. That's why you always have to take things on Wikipedia with a grain of salt. I love it dearly, and I still won't use it as a be-all, end-all source. Why? Because absolutely anyone can edit anything at any time - like changing Barack Obama's entry to say that maybe he was born in Kenya, then spicing that up with a variety of other "facts."

Joe apparently failed to realize this, deciding instead to list all the updates like it was some sort of smoking gun. What's awesome is that he failed to report the only actual fact in this situation: that whoever made those changes is someone who believes the information that Kovacs and the birther movement are preaching. Hell, it could've been Joe Kovacs himself who edited the entry. In other words, the whole "Look at all the changes being made to Obama's Wikipedia page!" story wasn't really much of a story at all.

Just who delivered baby Barack Obama? (July 12): WND is taking it to the source, folks, and trying to find doctors who worked at the hospital where Obama was born to see if they remembered the event:

Specifically, WND requested from Kapi'olani Medical Center spokeswoman Kristi Watanabe whether the hospital could determine from records how many babies were delivered at the hospital in 1961 and whether WND could obtain a list of the physicians affiliated with the hospital in 1961.
The goal was to see if any of the physicians working at the hospital in 1961 could be contacted today to see if they remembered who served as the attendant physician at Obama's birth.
WND was unable to obtain any of the records requested from the hospital.
WND did manage to locate one physician, Calvin Sia, M.D., a Honolulu pediatrician for more than 40 years at Kauikeolani Children's Hospital and Kapi'olani Medical Center, who began at Kapi'olani in 1958 and was there in 1961.
Although Sia said he had no idea which doctor at Kapi'olani was the attending physician at Obama's birth, he expressed his belief Obama was born at the hospital.

Awesome. Here's the thing: isn't it sort of ridiculous to suggest that doctors should remember the birth of a child from nearly fifty years ago, just because that child grew up to be someone famous? I would be willing to bet that you could ask the doctor who delivered me in 1979 if he remembered Brian Moynahan, and he wouldn't have the slightest clue. (Maybe I wasn't really born in New Hampshire. On the bright side, I just gave you my name, year of birth, and state of birth. Please don't steal my identity.) You could probably ask the doctor who delivered my son and he wouldn't remember. That's why it's foolish to expect the same from the doctor who delivered Barack Obama, wherever he is.

So yeah. Birthers. Keep it coming, folks, keep it coming. This is good, good stuff.

Forty Is The New Thirty: 2009 Update

2009-07-12T16:06:00.003-05:00

Last year's update was posted on August 20. For this year, I thought the All-Star Break would provide a natural stoppage for us to take a look at the six teams that have gone the longest without a forty homerun hitter.

Minnesota Twins

Last player to hit 40: Harmon Killebrew, 1970 (41)
Current leaders: Justin Morneau (21)

In 2006, Morneau had 23 homeruns at the break; he hit eleven in the second half to finish with 34. In 2007, he had 24 at the break; he hit seven in the second half to finish with 31. (He had a good year overall last year, but slumped to 23 homeruns.) This is the third time in four years that he has gone into the break with 20+ homeruns, and he always seems to slow down in the second half. His decision to skip the Homerun Derby in 2009 is probably a wise one.

Pittsburgh Pirates

Last player to hit 40: Willie Stargell, 1973 (44)
Current leader: Adam LaRoche (12)

The Pirates are bad at many things, but they are very good at avoiding forty-homerun hitters. Jason Bay was leading the team with 22 homeruns and had a good shot at forty before he was traded; Nate McLouth got off to a hot start, ended up with 26, and was traded this season, just in case. The only bona fide homerun threat in the lineup is LaRoche, who has never hit more than 19 homeruns in the second half (2006) or seven in a month (four times).

Detroit Tigers

Last player to hit 40: Cecil Fielder, 1991 (44)
Current leaders: Brandon Inge (21), Curtis Granderson (18), Miguel Cabrera (17)

Inge's career-high in homeruns is 27 in 2006. He had 17 roundtrippers at the All-Star Break that year but only ten in the second half. Granderson is hitting more homeruns, but fewer doubles and triples. And Cabrera hit 16 in the first half last year before stroking 21 in the second to lead the league at 37. He's probably got the best chance of anyone currently on the team to break forty.

Kansas City Royals

Last player to hit 40: None
Current leader: Miguel Olivo (13)

Miguel Olivo's career homerun high is 16. If he hits 27 homeruns in the second half, I will turn this into a blog that reports only on events that pertain to Miguel Olivo.

Florida Marlins

Last player to hit 40: Gary Sheffield, 1996 (42)
Current leader: Dan Uggla (16)

Uggla looked good at the halfway point last year, with 23, but only hit nine more the rest of the way to finish with 32. He hit fourteen in the second half of the previous two years.

Baltimore Orioles

Last player to hit 40: Rafael Palmeiro, 1998 (43)
Current leader: Luke Scott (17)

A forty-homerun hitter is unlikely this season, but with Nick Markakis, Nolan Reimold, Adam Jones, and Matt Wieters in the lineup, it may not be long before Baltimore gets off this list.

Now I Know How Molly Ringwald Felt

2009-07-06T23:01:00.002-05:00

Does anyone know what Sunday was? Anyone? Bueller?

Okay, I'll tell you. It was the third anniversary of the day I started One More Dying Quail. Don't feel bad - even I forgot about it until about ten minutes ago.

Hard to believe it's been three years already. Things have slowed down a lot in that time - last month was a record low for me, with one lonely post - as my writing energy has shifted elsewhere, but I still consider this my "home base", the place I can use when I need to post my thoughts about Roger Federer or Kendra Wilkinson.

Anyway, no big link posts this year (I'm not sure I had the content over the past year to support one). Just go read the new stuff at Bus Leagues so I can get rich and retire.

5-7, 7-6 (8-6), 7-6 (7-5), 3-6, 16-14

2009-07-06T20:14:00.004-05:00

I don't get to watch much television these days. Over the past few months, since my son learned how to operate the DVD player and ask for movies, my viewing has been limited to things like Shrek, Madagascar, Cars, Meet the Robinsons...you get the point.

Somehow, though, I wrested control of the remote from the little one on Sunday morning. My wife reminded me about the Wimbledon final (via a friend's Facebook status that mentioned how great the battle was between Federer and Roddick) and I turned the channel to NBC in the fifth set with the score 10-9 in favor of Federer.

It's amazing how much Federer's entire demeanor changes when Rafael Nadal is out of the picture. At both the French Open and Wimbledon, he had the appearance of a man who knew that he was, by a longshot, the best player in the building. When Nadal is the opponent, or looming further on down the draw, Federer looks nervous, his concentration starts to crack, he begins to show emotion. He becomes...human.

Without Nadal's presence to weigh him down, Federer's win was almost a foregone conclusion. Somehow, from the time I turned the television on, I knew he was going to beat Roddick. It was the same feeling he used to conjure up in the past, the same feeling he still conjures up whenever he plays anyone except Rafael Nadal. There was just a sense that he was playing his game, looking for Roddick to make a mistake, and willing to wait as long as possible for that to happen.

Eventually, of course, it did; Federer broke Roddick's serve and held his own, which was all he needed to take home his sixth Wimbledon title in seven years. (A thought about last year's final: if memory serves, the match was delayed at least twice by rain, allowing Nadal the opportunity to briefly rest his damaged knees. What if the retractable roof, new to this year's tournament, was in place last year? Might Federer have physically outlasted Nadal for the title, and might his streak now be at seven?)

One thing I will say about Roddick: his spirit and attitude were remarkable. While Federer has always exuded an air of calm during his matches, not matter the circumstances (again, except when he faces Nadal), Roddick has never seemed able to find a consistent oncourt style. My previous most prominent memory of him was from a Grand Slam final a few years ago, maybe the 2006 U.S. Open, against Federer. Every time he won a point, Roddick stormed around the court, ranting and raving and shouting like a madman. It seemed a calculated attempt to draw the home crowd into it and perhaps throw Federer off his game (I read later that Jimmy Connors, who I think was coaching Roddick at the time, used to do the same thing during his playing days), but all it did was waste precious energy. When playing Federer, I think, you need to conserve every possible ounce of energy and use it on the court.

On Sunday, however, Roddick just went about his business. Most players would have folded far earlier, but he held on for as long as possible, even coming close to breaking Federer's serve late in the fifth set. And after the match, while clearly upset with the loss, he was gracious in defeat. My favorite moment came when Federer said in the post-match interview that he knew what Roddick was feeling because he had lost in a similar manner last year. From halfway across the court, Roddick yelled back, "Yeah, but you had already won it five times!"

Bottom line, I'm glad I got the chance to catch the end of this classic match. I even recorded the ending (only the last game, but still) and can transfer it to VHS if I want, which is more than I can say for last year's epic. That match went away when we moved and had to get a different DVR unit (although I think you can buy it from Wimbledon.org for $19.99 or something).

Conversations With My Wife

2009-06-11T19:20:00.003-05:00

Me: Kendra Wilkinson is pregnant.

Her: Yeah.

Me: She's engaged to a football player.

Her: Yeah. If it's a girl, they're gonna name her Kaylee, because it's the first letter of her first name and her middle name. And if it's a boy, they're gonna name it Hank Baskett IV.

[pause]

Her: One step ahead of ya, babe.

Down Goes Nadal! Down Goes Nadal!

2009-05-31T11:41:00.003-05:00

Wow.

Rafael Nadal, for the first time EVER, has lost a match at the French Open. The Legend Killer? Robin Soderling of Sweden, a 24-year-old righthander with a 177-128 career record who is ranked 25th in the world.

This is good news and bad news for Roger Federer. On one hand, he has to figure his path is now clear to win the French Open and complete that elusive career Grand Slam, thus cementing his status as the Greatest Of All Time in the eyes of many observers. On the other hand, if he does win, he won't have to go through Nadal to do it. Sometimes, you have to break rough stretches by going through your biggest rival in order for it to feel right (like the Red Sox really NEEDED to beat the Yankees in the ALCS before winning the World Series; it wouldn't have been the same if they broke through against any other team).

Either way, Federer isn't the story. Nadal is.

Wow.

Who Called Randy Johnson's Pitches In 1993?

2009-05-25T17:45:00.003-05:00

I literally have about a dozen different things that I want to write about right now, including three that have been sitting in open tabs on my browser as reminders since Saturday. Right now, however, I figured I'd address a story that caught my eye earlier today, and attempt a little detective work to get to the bottom of things.

Every week for the last seventeen years, I have received a copy of Sports Illustrated in the mail. As it has become easier to access information online, however, my reading habits have changed. Where once I used to get the magazine a Thursday afternoon and read it by Thursday night, making sure to save Rick Reilly's column for last, I now get it on Thursday afternoon and read it...whenever I get to it, really. The reason is simple: most of what I actually read, the letters and feature stories, isn't extraordinarily time-sensitive, so I can leave it until I have a few minutes. Today, for example, I misplaced the book I had been reading, Stephen King's newest collection of short stories, so I grabbed SI.

The first thing I came to worth reading, besides the letters and a short obituary for Wayman Tisdale, was a story about Randy Johnson and his road to three hundred wins. I like baseball and have recently had conversations about The Big Unit with a couple friends, so I read it.

Near the beginning, Dave Valle told a story that I guess was supposed to highlight Johnson's dominance in the early 1990s. It went like this:

So dominant was Johnson that before a game in 1993, the home plate umpire told Mariners catcher Dave Valle, "They don't even need you with Randy pitching."

"What are you talking about?" replied Valle, who would not name the ump.

"He's so good they don't need you. Let me call the pitches tonight."

"I let him call every pitch," recalls Valle, to whom the umpire whispered pitches under his breath.

An overpowering Johnson went the distance in a Mariners victory.

Before deciding to post, I did a Google search for "Randy Johnson, umpire." Two results came up regarding this story - one from a blog that basically said, "This story HAS to be made up...right?" and another that did some of the same leg work I had also done, and will talk about in a minute. The point is, this is a pretty big deal. This is an umpire, the guy who is supposed to be an impartial arbiter, directly injecting himself into the events on the field.

This, in my opinion, is a much bigger deal than Alex Rodriguez tipping pitches to opposing middle infielders. Pitch tipping has gone on forever in baseball - I just read Peter Golenbeck's history of the Red Sox. At one point, he wrote about how when Jimmie Foxx, a well-liked player around the league was chasing Ruth's homerun record in the 1930s, pitchers would give him easy pitches to hit, trying to help him out. I'm almost positive I've never heard of an umpire trying to do something like this before (although there's this nagging feeling in the back of my head that I once read something similar. If anyone can help me out, please do so).

So I decided that this story deserved some attention. To Baseball-Reference!

1. The game was a complete game victory for Johnson.

Randy Johnson pitched ten complete games in 1993, winning seven of them. The dates and umpires for those games are as follows:

April 21 – Jim McKean
April 26 – Tim Welke
May 16 – Dale Scott
August 20 – Ken Kaiser
September 5 – Joe Brinkman
September 21 – Ed Hickox
October 1 – Drew Coble

2. The umpire said, "Let me call the pitches tonight."

It's a pretty common thing for people in baseball to refer to every game as "tonight." It's one of those little mind-melting things that comes from playing 162 games and traveling all over the country in a six month period. For the sake of the argument, however, I'm going to assume that the umpire was actually referring to a night game. If that's the case, we lose two day games and the list looks like this:

April 21 – Jim McKean
April 26 – Tim Welke
August 20 – Ken Kaiser
September 21 – Ed Hickox
October 1 – Drew Coble

3. Valle refused to name the umpire.

Most likely, Valle didn't want to name names because he realized this could become a complicated story and he didn't want to make life any more difficult than necessary for the umpire in question. Another possibility is that he didn't want to name names because the umpire in the story is still active and might be subject to some sort of censure by Major League Baseball (well, assuming MLB was willing to punish people for past sins).

There's a good chance that Valle was protecting the reputation of someone like Ken Kaiser or Drew Coble, respected umpires who would only be hurt by having their names mentioned in connection with a story of questionable ethics. I'm more inclined to believe that it's the latter, that the umpire is still active, which leaves the list looking like this:

April 26 - Tim Welke
September 21 - Ed Hickox

This is all pure speculation on my part, of course, and relies on Valle's story being truthful from the start. I hope he's exaggerating quite a bit. But if Major League Baseball cares at all about integrity, it should look into this some more and address it, even if only internally.

Conversations With My Parents

2009-05-25T01:33:00.003-05:00

In the past, I've mentioned that my father is generally a quiet man. What I might not have made clear is that he has a terrific, albeit dry, sense of humor. Saturday night, when we visited my parents after my nephew's tenth birthday party, the following exchange took place:

My mother (talking to me): Do you realize that this year, I'll be twice as old as you?

Me: Well, yeah, it makes sense. You were thirty when I was born, and I'm thirty this year, so you'll be twice as old. It's like when Anna (my younger sister) turns 35, you'll be 70.

My father (talking to no one in particular): Holy shit.

I wish I could do a better job of explaining how perfect the timing was. No sooner was the word "seventy" out of my mouth than he responded. It's actually even funnier than you'd first think because he's almost four year older than she is. By the time she hits seventy, he'll be well on his way to - gasp! - eighty. And when my father turns eighty, I'll be...46.

Holy shit.

2009 Baseball Ejections: Wild Wild West

2009-05-21T16:34:00.004-05:00

Nearly two years ago, I compiled a list of players, managers, and coaches who had been ejected from Major League Baseball games in 2007. It was a time-consuming process that I always assumed could be done more easily than the method I used, which involved me sitting in front of the computer, clicking on each individual box score and scrolling down to the bottom to see if anyone had been tossed. Because of the amount of time involved and the fact that last summer was, on a scale of 1-10, a 1.3 for me personally, I decided not to put another list together.

Lately, though, I got an itch. Maybe it was the Eddie Guardado ejection on April 30, when Easy Eddie was brought into the game with the bases loaded, promptly walked the first batter he faced on four pitches, was removed from the game, THEN ejected by the home plate umpire. Or maybe it was April 12, when Joe West went on a rampage, tossing three Los Angeles Angels who had the temerity to express displeasure that Red Sox pitcher Josh Beckett appeared to have thrown intentionally at Bobby Abreu's head (manager Mike Scioscia joined them the next inning when he was given the heave-ho by Ed Rapuono; ironically, Beckett was the one who was later suspended for his actions).

Actually, I don't remember when I decided to put this list together again, but I remember when I knew it was a good idea: on May 16, when Angels pitcher John Lackey (angry start for the Halos, with seven ejections already) was thrown out for hitting Ian Kinsler in the ribs. The catch, of course, was that even though Kinsler had hit two homeruns the night before and was leading off the game, it was Lackey's first game of the season after spending six weeks on the disabled list. He threw two pitches. The ump who ran him was not, unfortunately, Joe West.

The current list of 2009 ejections is below. Please feel free to email or comment with any that I have missed or misidentified. And, if you stumbled upon this and find the subject reasonably interesting, you owe it to yourself to check out The Left Field Corner, home of the MLB Umpire Ejection Fantasy League. My stuff is basically found in list form - over there, they give a lot of information, with links and graphs and all sorts of cool stuff. It's pretty awesome.

(Oh, and at some point, the plan is to go back through previous years and take down that information as well. I know places like Elias and SABR keep lists of these things, but I've never been able to find them online. If they are, and my life's work is now worthless, feel free to break the bad news, gently.)

(complete through May 20, 2009)

Japan (World Baseball Classic)
March 17 – Kenji Johjima, catcher
Top 7th by home plate umpire Hunter Wendelstedt

Baltimore Orioles (2)
April 28 – Dave Trembly, manager
Top 7th by home plate umpire Angel Hernandez for arguing a balk call

May 3 – Dave Trembly, manager (2)
Bottom 5th by home plate umpire Chris Tiller for arguing balls and strikes

Boston Red Sox (1)
May 14 – Terry Francona, manager
Top 10th by home plate umpire Bill Miller for arguing balls and strikes

Chicago Cubs (1)
April 16 – Milton Bradley, pinch hitter
Bottom 6th by home plate umpire Larry Vanover for arguing balls and strikes

Chicago White Sox (2)
May 13 – Jermaine Dye, right field
Top 6th by home plate umpire Mike DiMuro for arguing balls and strikes

May 13 – Ozzie Guillen, manager
Top 6th by home plate umpire Mike DiMuro for arguing balls and strikes

Cincinnati Reds (2)
April 25 – Dusty Baker, manager
Bottom 4th by home plate umpire Mike Estabrook for arguing balls and strikes

April 25 – Jerry Hairston, Jr., center field
Bottom 4th by home plate umpire Mike Estabrook for arguing balls and strikes

Cleveland Indians (2)
April 27 – Eric Wedge, manager
Top 4th by home plate umpire CB Bucknor for arguing a foul ball call

May 15 – Eric Wedge, manager (2)
Top 3rd by home plate umpire Greg Gibson for arguing a play at the plate

Colorado Rockies (1)
April 13 – Clint Hurdle, manager
Mid 5th by first base umpire Tim McClelland for arguing a balk call

Detroit Tigers (1)
May 13 – Jim Leyland, manager
Top 7th by home plate umpire Paul Schrieber for arguing after Schrieber made physical contact with Detroit’s Magglio Ordonez

Florida Marlins (4)
May 15 – Fredi Gonzalez, manager
Bottom 8th by first base umpire Ed Rapuono for arguing a hit batsman call

May 15 – Dan Uggla, second base
Bottom 8th by home plate umpire Joe West for arguing balls and strikes

May 15 – Emilio Bonifacio, second base
Bottom 9th by first base umpire Ed Rapuono for arguing a call at first base

May 20 – Jeremy Hermida, left field
Bottom 10th by home plate umpire Todd Tichenor for arguing balls and strikes

Houston Astros (2)
April 25 – Ivan Rodriguez, catcher
Top 8th by home plate umpire Mike Dimuro for arguing balls and strikes

April 25 – Cecil Cooper, manager
Top 8th by home plate umpire Mike Dimuro for arguing balls and strikes

Los Angeles Angeles of Anaheim (7)
April 12 – Mickey Hatcher, hitting coach
Bottom 1st by second base umpire Joe West for arguing after Boston pitcher Josh Beckett threw at Bobby Abreu

April 12 – Torii Hunter, center field
Bottom 1st by second base umpire Joe West for arguing after Boston pitcher Josh Beckett threw at Bobby Abreu

April 12 – Justin Speier, pitcher
Bottom 1st by second base umpire Joe West for arguing after Boston pitcher Josh Beckett threw at Bobby Abreu

April 12 – Mike Scioscia, manager
Top 2nd by third base umpire Ed Rapuano for continuing to argue the previous ejections

April 21 – Mike Scioscia, manager (2)
Bottom 6th by home plate umpire Tim Timmons for arguing balls and strikes

May 6 – Mike Scioscia, manager (3)
Top 8th by home plate umpire Bill Hohn for arguing a warning

May 16 – John Lackey, pitcher
Bottom 1st by home plate umpire Bob Davidson for hitting a batter (It was Lackey’s first start of the season after spending the first six weeks on the disabled list. He threw two pitches: the first went behind Kinsler, the second hit him in the ribs.)

Minnesota Twins (1)
May 14 – Ron Gardenhire, manager
Bottom 7th by home plate umpire Paul Nauert for arguing a hit batsman

New York Mets (2)
May 7 – Jerry Manuel, manager
Top 8th by first base umpire Bill Welke for arguing an obstruction call

May 15 – Jerry Manuel, manager (2)
Top 8th by home plate umpire Doug Eddings for arguing balls and strikes

New York Yankees (3)
May 4 – Joe Girardi, manager
Bottom 5th by home plate umpire Jerry Meals for arguing balls and strikes

May 6 – Nick Swisher, right field
Bottom 7th by home plate umpire James Hoye for arguing balls and strikes

May 15 – Johnny Damon, left field
Bottom 3rd by home plate umpire Wally Bell for arguing balls and strikes

Oakland Athletics (1)
May 9 – Bob Geren, manager
Bottom 7th by home plate umpire Paul Nauert for arguing balls and strikes

Philadelphia Phillies (1)
April 25 – Charlie Manuel, manager
Top 10th by home plate umpire Ed Montague for arguing balls and strikes

San Francisco Giants (2)
May 15 – Bruce Bochy, manager
Bottom 8th by home plate umpire Doug Eddings for arguing balls and strikes

May 20 – Bruce Bochy, manager (2)
Top 8th by first base umpire Gary Cederstrom for arguing a play at first base

Tampa Bay Rays (2)
April 16 – Joe Maddon, manager
Top 6th by home plate umpire Brian Gorman for arguing a foul ball

May 2 – Jim Hickey, pitching coach
Top 7th by home plate umpire John Hirschbeck for arguing balls and strikes

Texas Rangers (2)
April 28 – Chris Davis, first base
Bottom 6th by home plate umpire Eric Cooper for arguing balls and strikes

April 30 – Eddie Guardado, pitcher
Top 7th by home plate umpire Angel Campos (“Before Matt Holliday homered in the ninth, Oakland got runs on two sacrifice flies and a bases-loaded walk issued by Eddie Guardado, who threw four balls to the only batter he faced and was ejected by umpire Angel Campos after he had already been taken out of the game.”)

Washington Nationals (2)
April 17 – Manny Acta, manager
Bottom 4th by home plate umpire Tim Timmons for arguing balls and strikes

Thoughts On Steroids, Courtesy Of Arthur Ashe

2009-05-08T22:24:00.003-05:00

I started making weekly regular trips to the local library about six months ago and immediately fell in love with the ongoing book sale located just inside the front door. There are some really good titles there, by authors like Stephen Ambrose and David Halberstam, and hardly a week goes by that I don't spend a dollar or two to pick up a book that catches my eye.

Awhile back, probably when I was on my tennis kick during the Australian Open in January, I bought "Arthur Ashe On Tennis." It has a little bit of everything: advice on the best grips, thoughts on modern players (it was published in the 1990s), different strategies for amateur players. I haven't read it straight through or anything, but it's one of those books I tend to keep in the bathroom and thumb through from time to time.

I was doing just that the other day when I came across a passage that was very interesting, especially in light of recent events. In the section on traditions, under the heading, "The Most Abused Rule," Ashe writes the following:

"Just about every amateur or club player abuses the foot fault rule. It is one of those things that separates the pros from the amateurs. The amateurs really don't give a damn, but for the pros it's a big deal.

Is it cheating? Let's put it this way. Cheating is breaking the rules on the sly. If you are breaking the rules and everybody knows it, you really are not cheating. You are giving yourself an advantage but you are not breaking any moral code. It is illegal but not immoral, I would say. It is exactly like a gimme on a six-inch putt in golf."

One of the things we tend to hear about the Steroid Era is that it was the sort of situation where everyone knew what was going on...and turned a blind eye to it. So, in Arthur Ashe's view, those who used 'roids in baseball back in the day weren't cheating or being immoral (even though they were breaking the rules). They were just seeking the same advantage as everyone else. Interesting.

I Really Need To Go Through My Closet

2009-05-02T16:52:00.003-05:00

The draft for the fantasy football league my brother and I are in was held last year at a North Hampton restaurant called Wings Your Way. At the end, his friend Ernie disappeared for a few minutes before returning with t-shirts for everyone. On the back, the company logo. On the front, the words, "I Got Boned."

For obvious reasons, this is what I like to refer to as one of my weekend shirts, meaning I only wear it around the house on the weekends, and rarely then. Never outside.

Today, after looking through my available t-shirts, I settled on Wings Your Way. The plan was to lounge around the house all day, maybe do some laundry or wash some dishes, so it should've been safe.

Should've been.

Around 3:45, I got a little cabin fever and decided to go for a walk. We had left my car with Vicki's parents when we went to the movies last night and I figured I could get it and some exercise at the same time. I even took the trash out on the way. All the right moves, baby.

I was probably a quarter mile from home when I realized that I had forgotten to change my shirt. Two kids in an SUV ran a stop sign, putting me into "Outraged Old Man" mode. My mood changed as they passed, however, and I swear I heard the girl behind the wheel say, "Does that say, 'I Got Boned'?" Why yes, young lady, it does.

The rest of the 1 1/2 mile walk was a blast, to say the least. I spent most of it concocting various scenarios in which groups of big mean guys mocked my shirt and I disarmed them with witty comebacks delivered in a dry, "I'm laughing now, but will gladly kick your ass later," manner. Think Bruce Willis in any of the Die Hard movies, only instead of a tough-as-nails New York cop, he's a short fat guy from New Hampshire who's never been in a fight. That was my imaginary situation, which surprisingly did not come to fruition. Much a pity.

Anyway, I got to Vicki's parents without further incident (although I'm pretty sure there were some strange looks from passing cars). My mother-in-law got a kick out of the fact that I had been wandering the streets of Milford in the state my wardrobe was in, so hey, at least I brought some joy to somebody's life.

And I got to drive home instead of walking, which was nice.

I Was Thinking...

2009-05-02T13:09:00.003-05:00

I haven't written a random thoughts post in forever. Come to think of it, I haven't written a post in forever. But the baby is sleeping, lunch is cooking, and I have a bit of the writing itch creeping up. We'll see what happens.

...we went to the Milford Drive-In last night to see "X-Men Origins: Wolverine" and "Taken". Both were good, although Vicki tired of me asking if Liam Neeson was "gonna kick that guy's ass" about five minutes into the latter movie. What a relief when he actually did kick somebody's ass.

...I did have one major problem with each movie. In "Wolverine", Hugh Jackman probably shouted, "VICTOR!" at least five times throughout. It would've been nice if they had figured out some other way for him to announce to his brother that an ass-kicking was imminent. And in "Taken", every time Maggie Grace approached someone, she ran up to them like a little kid. Her character was supposed to be seventeen, but she acted like an eight-year-old. If Liam Neeson hadn't wanted to save her so bad, I would've been rooting for the bad guys to win.

...my kid (or any future kids) is never, ever going on a trip - to Europe, to Boston, to the Cumberland Farms down the street - without adult supervision.

...I can't get over the number of times lately that I have seen cars pulled over by police in completely unsafe areas. Pretty sure that it's not good to completely obstruct one full lane in a two lane road, or less than a hundred feet from a highway on-ramp (again blocking a full lane and requiring cars to pass unsafely. Maybe the stops are warranted, but if they are for nothing more than minor traffic violations, better judgment should be used.

...cheap plug: my writing these days can be found at Bus Leagues Baseball (more often than it's found here, anyway). My most recent posts are an interview with minor league baseball player Paul Rutgers and a video of Jacoby Ellsbury stealing home against the Yankees.

This Song Will Never Be The Same Again

2009-04-23T16:19:00.003-05:00

I'd like to dedicate this song to Tom, Chris, and the poor karaoke guy who spent six minutes just wishing it would end.

My Favorite Movie Quotes, Volume 23

2009-04-07T23:07:00.001-05:00

Backdraft (1991)

Lt. Steven McCaffrey: Look at him... That's my brother god damnit.