Virtual Words

The Big (Blog) Move

2009-02-11T07:54:00.002Z

Virtual Words is now here:

http://ianwaugh.wordpress.com/

Drama in Malta as the Politicians Lose the Plot

2009-01-24T10:42:00.004Z

The Malta Government want to replace the Opera House site with a parliament building.

We strongly oppose this.

No to House of Parliament instead of Opera House (Malta)

"Dr Lawrence Gonzi has again announced that his government intends to develop the site of the Old Opera House into a new Houses of Parliament. This is a group for people who oppose this initiative and who believe that the Old Opera House site should be developed for the Arts, Theatre and Culture".

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=5534744

_________________________________________

The Opera House Malta

The Story and Controversy Surrounding The Opera House Bomb Site in Valletta.

"This is not about politics - this is an issue in relation to the preservation and development of the Arts, Theatre and Culture for the Maltese and the many who visit, adore and enjoy these Mediterranean islands." Ian Waugh, Website Creator

Today there is a storm in Malta over the future of this prominent bomb site. Thousands of Maltese are angry and alarmed that, after all these years, the Prime Minister seems hell-bent on turning this into a place for Parliament.

http://www.maltaoperahouse.com/

Malta Opera House Bomb Site

2008-12-28T12:00:00.000Z

www.maltaoperahouse.com

Malta Opera House "Scandal"

2008-12-16T09:11:00.004Z

There is a highly charged debate going in the Mediterranean. In Malta to be precise. It's politicians against theatre and the performing arts.

After more than 65 years as a highly visible reminder of the horrors the Maltese endured during World War Two, the Prime Minister of these islands has announced that the Opera House bomb site will not be reinstated as a place of theatre but as .... parliament itself!

This has infuriated thousands of Maltese and foreigners who are up in arms about what must be one of the most ridiculous proposals in decades.

There is a highly active Facebook "Group" based on this debate here.

Me, as a mere foreigner, have brought this issue further into the worldwide web here.

www.cultel.com

This morning I had this from Alex Simpson from Guildford, who is up the wall over the Prime Minister's decision, referring to the whole matter as a cultural "scandal":

"Dear Ian,

Well done on this website. In my view this whole thing is a scandal.

I first started visiting Malta in the 1960’s with my late mother and father. As dreaded “tourists” we never partook in “fish ‘n’ chips” we did go to Theatre and my father always insisted in absorbing the culture in preference to the sun whilst taking time out to remember the many who died in the defence of Malta, the Mediterranean for the free world.

We used to wonder past the ruins of the Opera House and we always paused to gaze at this painful sight. I can still recall my father, year in year out, wondering when the theatre was going to be rebuilt.

The 1970’s came and went and by the 1980’s I was bringing my own children and family to Malta. Something’s never changed – we never partook in “fish ‘n’ chips”, we carried on going to Theatre and taking in the culture. Like my father I took my own children past the Opera House ruins which remained painfully and apparently ignored.

The 1990’s came and went. By now my parents were gone, my children grown up. The Opera House still not rebuilt as theatre. I was beginning to wonder why. I couldn’t understand why “they” (the elected power house) just still left it in ruins disrespecting theatre. Perhaps “they” simply had no respect for the creative arts.

Here we are. I am now retired. My children are married and I am a grandfather. In October my wife and I, my son and my grandchildren returned to Malta. We ate good Maltese food as usual, we ignored “fish ‘n’ chips”, took in the culture, stood exactly where my father stood more than 45 years ago to pause and remember. We strolled again past the ruins of the Opera House. We stood and stared as I tried to explain to my inquisitive grandchildren what this wreck was. My grandson asked me why it was in ruins and not a theatre. I told him (because I honestly don’t know the answer) that “they” are still thinking about it.

Through all these years we have always thought that one day a theatre or performing arts centre would replace the Opera House in Valletta. My grandchildren’s great-grandfather believed it, as have I and my now grown-up children.

I am sorry. I am so really sorry that after all these years of waiting, of questioning that a politician has ignored the wishes of his people. This bomb site is a long lasting reminder of the fight for democracy for which thousands died to preserve freedom. One man has decreed that the wishes of his people are ignored. The site of theatre is to wiped out completely to be replaced by a building for his fellow politicians.

I am appalled, my father and mother would have been disgusted, my children are bemused.
After all this, after standing as a ruined theatre, a bomb site. Malta suffered long dark days in the war – it will be a another dark day when the doors open again on this site, not as a theatre but as parliament.

I wish you well with your efforts.

Alex Simpson"

What Next For Malta's Opera House Site?

2008-12-14T16:59:00.003Z

After more than 65 years as a World War Two bomb site the Malta government plan to place a Parliamentary building at the entrance to Malta's historic capital city, Valletta.

Thousands of Maltese and a great many non-Maltese oppose this action in favour of having a place of Maltese theatre, arts and culture. maltaoperahouse.com is adding pressure to an already energetic campaign to persuade Malta's Prime Minister, Dr. Lawrence Gonzi to reconsider his plans and give his citizens and the thousands of visitors to these Mediterranean islands what they want.

On Facebook:

No to House of Parliament instead of Opera House (Malta) - Link

"Dr Lawrence Gonzi has again announced that his government intends to develop the site of the Old Opera House into a new Houses of Parliament. This is a group for people who oppose this initiative and who believe that the Old Opera House site should be developed for the Arts, Theatre and Culture".

A Moment in History

2008-11-05T07:11:00.003Z

Democratic Senator Barack Obama says "change has come to America", after being elected the first black president of the United States.

BBC News: "It's been a long time coming, but tonight... change has come to America," the president-elect told a jubilant crowd at a park in Chicago.

His rival John McCain accepted defeat, saying "I deeply admire and commend" Mr Obama. He called on his supporters to lend the next president their goodwill.

The BBC's Justin Webb said the result would have a profound impact on the US.

"On every level America will be changed by this result... [it] will never be the same," he said.

Mr Obama appeared with his family, and his running mate Joe Biden, before a crowd of tens of thousands in Grant Park, Chicago.

"If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible, who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time, who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer," he said.

Facebook Hell

2008-11-03T11:36:00.009Z

There are a great many social websites available these days. A chance to link to old mates. Mates who have other mates or mates you kind of know but only within the safe distance of your desktop.

With these sites you can show the world how many dozens of ‘friends’ you have.

If you only have a few ‘friends’ then there’s this unspoken feeling by others that actually you are ‘Johnny No Friends’. You are lonely and lead a sad pathetic life where nobody wants to know you. Because in cyber space size really is everything.

So if you revel in having many dozens of these ‘friends’ you can show the world what a dynamic and truly active person you are despite the reality that in fact with these websites having many ‘friends’ is not unlike the geezer who owns a flashy red sports car! You get my meaning ? Surely I don’t have to spell it out!

As someone who lives in the real world where there are real people who live and breathe I take these websites with a pinch of salt.

For me the internet is a way of conveniently expressing myself and linking cautiously with a world beyond my doorstep. I never express personal details of my private life, my relationship or any matters beyond my interests or profession.

If I feel sad, let down or depressed I reserve my feelings as far from this superficial cyber space as possible. Some revel in all this and use the internet as crotch to hang what increasingly seems a very shallow, over inflated and lonely existence.

I have played round with, joined, deleted and forgotten quite a few of these social sites. I enjoyed building my sad little profile and playing around with the HTML and see what sort of a mess I can make before getting thoroughly bored and deleting it!

Facebook and I have a dangerous moderate / hate relationship.

Earlier this year I thought I’d top up the numbers of a few friends I have on this platform. So I sent a few ‘friends’ invites to people I have known and worked with and who actually have a Facebook account.

One of these alleged ‘friends’ was a news journalist at a radio station where I worked in the 1980’s. He wasn’t just a colleague he was a real-life friend so I thought. So much so that he was also a lodger of mine while when I lived in Exeter, South West England.

So naturally I sent him a request to join me at Facebook. And therein started a nightmare the shock of which I will never forget.

The ferocity and slanderous reply this South West radio and television broadcast personality and journalist sent me shocked me so much that I was forced to report the disgusting email and Facebook message (the edited detail you can see from a screen shot of his Facebook reply which was copied to my email account).

As a 54 year old disabled stroke victim with severe mobility issues I found the comments by this alleged intelligent person, a person who prides himself through the internet as 'professional' nothing less than seriously threatening. If he was capable of writing this to me ... what else was he capable of? Here was someone I hadn't had any real contact with for some years. My intention to add him as a 'friend' was totally innocent. How wrong and damaged I was.

Facebook is in many ways a ‘faceless’ large website who’s intentions are fairly obvious but at the end of the day it is a commercial machine where ‘bums on seats’ (or user numbers) is premium.

My experience with these websites is one of extreme caution.

I use it and it uses me. That’s where the relationship begins and ends.

This weekend the technology of Facebook got the better of me as I inadvertently wiped my Facebook account and in so doing instantly lost contact with my ‘friends’ or the 50 or so I have built up.

I then had to go crawling back to the ‘friends’ I could remember and ask them to re-link. This was an interesting exercise in a way because it demonstrated to me exactly how strong these ‘friendships’ really are by the numbers who could be bothered or cared to befriend me again by pressing a button.

The result is depressing if you care about this superficial world they call cyberspace. A world where the difference between being a ‘friend’ is merely a button away … the difference between ‘accept’ and ‘decline’. Which is why I maintain thank goodness there is nothing like the real world with real friends and loved ones.

The Pomposity of the BBC

2008-10-31T06:37:00.007Z

As Auntie Beeb licks her wounds and re-adjusts her tatty bloomers many in the UK are really angry at a broadcast corporation financed by the licence payer that has extreme basic management and editorial flaws.

This after a week which has exposed this 'Voice of Britain' as an organisation so seriously multi layered in management levels that it seems incapable of conducting itself in a manner befitting an international and national broadcaster.

The events this week exposed the incompetence of a broadcaster who transmitted pre-recorded material which harassed a 78 year old public figure, which made sexual references to his grand-daughter and was allowed all this to be transmitted in the name of "comedy" caused more than 37,000 complaints.

After the contractual resignation of Brand (one of the idiot "presenters"), the alleged "resignation" of the Controller of Radio 2, Lesley Douglas and the suspension without pay of Ross (the other idiot "presenter") suddenly the BBC has declared from it's ivory towers they have drawn "a line under radio row' (their words).

"Ross, whose £18m, three-year contract had become a lightning rod for critics of the BBC, was said to have accepted the sanction without complaint" (The Guardian).

Regarding the departure of Radio 2's Controller, Don Foster, the Liberal Democrats' media spokesman, last night told The Guardian, "This resignation seems to have more to do with satisfying the media feeding frenzy than in working out what went wrong and ensuring it doesn't happen again."

So that's it then. End of story. The BBC licks a few wounds, pours a gin and tonic, has a sigh of relief and it's business as usual. Today's Friday, the weekend is here ... it's been a crap week and all will be well on Monday morning.

Meanwhile in the real world the licence payers who fund this bloated corporation (£139.50 GBP or 178.364 EUR per year) are asking themselves why Ross is paid many, many millions of pounds a year to broadcast on the BBC and how all this horror happened in the first place.

To compound all this fall-out I can honestly say that the reputation of not just the BBC but of British broadcasting is now truly in tatters. I can say that because this week I have spoken to three separate broadcast executives and two business people and potential business investors outside the UK all of whom have hinted their doubts about the alleged professional reputation of British broadcasting.

May I thank the BBC very much indeed not only from myself but from those of us related to broadcasting who have developing business connections outside the UK for not only buggering your own reputation but also for applying mud to innocents with no connections to your fat Empire.

I have travelled and worked extensively outside the UK. On each and every contract I carried with me the unspoken excellent reputation of British broadcasting. I met many who prided themselves in their career and broadcast connections with the BBC. Many told me how they deeply respected the Corporation as "solid", "trustworthy" and "impartial".

That was then.

Today (and over the past few years) I have found fewer admirers and more and more critics of British broadcasting internationally. Indeed as the rows within the corporation have become more and more public. As the Auntie has been washing more of her bloomers in public so the name of British broadcasting generally has been severely dented.

The knock-on effect for smaller people like myself, for those trying to do business beyond the UK is disastrous.

The BBC this time and previously in these matters simply has never ever learnt anything (the tragic David Kelly affair, The Hutton Report, the Queen documentary even as far back as the Alasdair Milne resignation in 1987). As the years pass the scandals become more lewd more revolting.

The BBC declare a line drawn - the rest of are left picking up the professional debris.

BBC In Meltdown

2008-10-30T06:46:00.009Z

It's day four in the big broadcasting house and the housemates are running around impersonating chickens with their heads off. While licence payers look on in bewilderment, nobody is laughing but everybody is asking who is going to pay the massive regulator fines for a dreadful BBC editorial breach?

For the last few days this bloggy bloke has been scribbling a few words about the naughty, silly BBC "presenters" known now to the general public of this green and pleasant land as those with "mouths like a sewer".

In case you have been concerning yourself with other matters in the news like the economy, the impending Barack Obama US election win or even the 2.30 at Haydock let me just fill you in.

Warning: this blog entry contains strong language

Two idiots "present" a BBC Radio 2 (UK national network) radio programme. This is a pre-recorded show. They harass a 78 year British actor on his answer phone by leaving lewd messages. They discuss sexual relations with the elderly man's grand-daughter. The pre-recorded programme is editorially cleared by a BBC idiot and transmitted across the UK. 27,000 people complain to the BBC. At least two complaints are received by the police. The BBC management delay and counter delay serious executive action. National broadcast crisis ensues. The reputation of the BBC and British broadcasting in general in the UK and overseas is left in tatters.

Yesterday one of the idiot "presenters" (Brand) resigned his broadcasting contract with the BBC and again used that worthless word "sorry". To me Brand did not in the slightest bit appear "sorry" for not recognising the most basic fact of being a professional presenter - that you are entering peoples homes and broadcasting across a wide ranging audience. By doing so you should respect the person you are directing your "talent". No! I suggest Mr. Brand should learn the meaning of the word "sorry" and how it can be applied in an honest manner to Andrew Sachs, his granddaughter and the 1,000's of people Brand offended.

And what of the other idiot "presenter", Ross? He remains suspended. He remains (reportedly) the BBC's highest paid "presenter".

What of the idiot BBC "producer" of all this filth? Therein lies a mystery.

And what of the person who is editorially in control of what the BBC inflicts on the nation?

No doubt this horror show will continue to roll-out despite the appalling damage to reputations in the UK and beyond.

The BBC should have acted instantly and decisively. Firstly by not broadcasting this disgusting material. Even after transmission the Corporation which prides itself in "broadcast management" (another huge big fat joke) should have acted immediately by firing those involved.

This is nothing less than a major professional disgrace by a management team who could not arrange a booze-up in a gin factory.

Today the BBC's director general is to meet representatives of licence fee payers to discuss lewd phone calls made on a Radio 2 show. Meanwhile as audiences to BBC output and product remain angry this particular show rolls ever onwards.

Today's installment on the BBC News website:

Mark Thompson will brief the BBC Trust on a preliminary inquiry into how the calls to Fawlty Towers actor Andrew Sachs came to be broadcast.

Russell Brand has resigned from Radio 2 and Jonathan Ross has been suspended.

The pair made obscene comments about Sach's 23-year-old granddaughter Georgina Baillie during phone calls.

During the meeting on Thursday, the BBC's director of audio and music, Tim Davie, is due to present a preliminary report on the calls to the Trust.

"Wrest control"

Mr Thompson will then brief trust members on latest developments, followed by a discussion on what action can be taken

The BBC's media correspondent, Torin Douglas, said the BBC was perceived as having "lost control" of events following the broadcast and the subsequent row, which has now attracted 27,000 complaints.

The broadcast watchdog Ofcom has launched its own investigation.

"The BBC is now trying to wrest control back," said our correspondent. "People are saying the BBC should have acted a lot quicker."

Actor Sachs, 78, was upset after Brand and Ross left a series of lewd messages on his voicemail as part of a pre-recorded show, taped on 16 October.

During the calls, Ross swore and said Brand had slept with Sachs' granddaughter.

Sachs later said he had "respect" for Brand's decision to step down.

Brand, who is believed to have been paid more than £200,000 a year for his Saturday-night show, said in a statement that he took "complete responsibility" for the incident.

"As I only do the radio show to make people laugh I've decided that, given the subsequent coverage, I will stop doing the show," he said.

"I got a bit caught up in the moment and forgot that, at the core of the rude comments and silly songs, were the real feelings of a beloved and brilliant comic actor and a very sweet and big-hearted young woman."

'Stupid error'

Meanwhile, Ross said in a statement: "I am deeply sorry and greatly regret the upset and distress that my juvenile and thoughtless remarks on the Russell Brand show have caused."

He said he had not issued a statement before because he had intended to apologise "to all those offended" on his Friday night chat show.

"However, it was a stupid error of judgement on my part and I offer a full apology," it added.

BBC One show Friday Night with Jonathan Ross, which was due to have been filmed at BBC Television Centre, west London, on Wednesday, has been cancelled.

A decision has yet to be taken on what should be shown in its place on Friday night.

Ross's Saturday morning radio show has also been pulled from Radio 2's schedules.

More than 27,000 people have complained to the BBC while watchdog Ofcom has launched its own investigation.

This is what was transmitted (from the BBC News website):

The show is broadcast between 2100 and 2300 BST. It opens with this warning: "The next programme contains some strong language which some listeners may find offensive."

Early in the show, Ross jokes about an interview planned with Sachs telling Brand that "I had a go on his daughter" would be "the sort of thing you'd say".

Brand replies that he knows Sachs' granddaughter - 23-year-old Georgina Baillie - and says she has visited his home and that she is a member of "a baroque dance group called the satanicsluts.com".

He continues: "She always said to me, 'don't mention that to my granddad Manuel', and now here we are.

"So when we talk to Manuel, don't mention that his granddaughter's a satanic slut."

After it emerges that Sachs will not now be in the show due to unforeseen circumstances, listeners hear Brand and Ross leave four messages on the actor's voicemail.

Here are extracts from those messages:

Message one: As Brand begins to leave a message, Ross blurts out: "He fucked your granddaughter... I'm sorry I apologise. Andrew, I apologise, I got excited, what can I say - it just came out.

Brand replies: "Andrew Sachs, I did not do nothing with Georgina - oh no, I've revealed I know her name. Oh no, it's a disaster."

Ross goes on to say: "If he's like most people of a certain age, he's probably got a picture of his grandchildren when they're young right by the phone. So while he's listening to the messages, he's looking at a picture of her about nine on a swing..."

Message two: "Andrew, this is Russell Brand. I'm so sorry about the last message, it was part of the radio show - it was a mistake."

Ross adds: "It might be true but we didn't want to break it to you in such a harsh way."

Brand goes on to say: "No, I'm sorry, I'll do anything. I wore a condom. Put the phone down. Oh, what's going to happen?"

Message three: The message opens with Ross saying: "She was bent over the couch..."

Brand then improvises a song which includes the lines: "I said some things I didn't of oughta, like I had sex with your granddaughter..."

Message four: Brand opens the message with: "Alright Andrew Sachs' answerphone? I'm ever so so sorry for what I said about Andrew Sachs."

"Just say sorry," adds Ross,
"I'll kill you," says Brand laughing.
"Don't say you'll wear him as a hat - just say sorry," continues Ross.
"Sorry, right," adds Brand.

BBC Shattered Credibility

2008-10-29T06:55:00.014Z

Yesterday when I was scribbling my bloggy thingy I was banging on about how two exceedingly highly paid BBC "presenters" had abused their position by publicly harassing British actor Andrew Sachs (78) on air and then suggesting having sex with his grand-daughter, Georgina Baille. On top of all this horror was the fact that these revolting broadcasts were not live but pre-recorded and therefore cleared by some idiot for transmission across the national radio service, Radio 2. Presumably this filth was assumed amusing by certain Corporation employees as it was deemed fit for transmission.

Yesterday the flood of complaints to the BBC had more than doubled to 10,000 with many in the UK calling for simple, basic action by the BBC - to fire the "presenters" and the those in grey suits who sanctioned the transmission of these truly appalling broadcasts.

By yesterday evening this story was leading news bulletins ahead of the economy and the US elections.

By 10.00pm last night it was being reported that at least two people in the UK had actually reported the incidents to the police.

What I find incredible is how such pre-recorded material had been passed fit for broadcast despite internal BBC regulations and regulator (OFCOM) guidelines to contrary. It is now obvious those who are employed by the BBC feel they are above such rules.

Apart from all this dreadful business, I wonder in the pits of my heart what sort of creepy nasty characters Ross and Brand really are to leave such nastiness on the answer machine of a man well in his 70's, to suggest sexual relations with his grand-daughter and then broadcast it to a national audience for goodness sake!

Apart from implications for the Corporation locally in the UK there is also the dreadful fall-out for the BBC internationally as a presumably former respected broadcaster with World Services and several international broadcast strands.

Their, slow, slow lack of direct action and management is indeed painful for the entire BBC. Ross and Brand are disposable, overpaid insignificants compared with the rest of the entire Corporation, it's product and the employees who work for the BBC. The Corporation has enjoyed so much credibility internationally, now as this story is international news in itself, one wonders where the damage will end.

For those of us British broadcasters with professional connections outside the UK this mud could well stick. I very seriously hope not.

Who cares about Ross and Brand when there are far more important issues at stake like the credibility of British broadcasting?

Are British broadcasters going to become a professional joke beyond these shores I wonder?

Or has the horse bolted?

This morning the current status (reported by the BBC) ... :

The BBC is coming under increased pressure to sack Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross following their prank calls made to actor Andrew Sachs.

His granddaughter Georgina Baillie told the Sun the pair "should at least pay for what they've done with their jobs".

Tory MP Nigel Evans said he would choose to end the pair's contracts.

"The least that should happen is that they should be suspended, pending the outcome of the inquiry by Ofcom and the BBC Trust," he said.

Brand and Ross made a series of prank calls made to Sachs, 78, famous for his part in Fawlty Towers. The calls were broadcast on Radio 2 as part of a pre-recorded show on 18 October.
During the calls, Ross revealed that Brand had slept with Sachs' granddaughter.

Someone high up at the BBC must have decided it was funny and suitable for national radio.

But Ms Baillie, 23, said she felt "betrayed" and "embarrassed" that the relationship had been publicly revealed to her grandfather. She said that he was "really upset, and says he wants the whole situation to end".

She added of Brand and Ross: "They are beyond contempt. They are warped for what they have put me and my grandfather through.

"It was bad enough that they recorded these things on my grandfather's answer machine but astonishing the BBC saw fit to broadcast it when they could have stopped it.

"Someone high up at the BBC must have decided it was funny and suitable for national radio. They've shown an appalling lack of judgement."

Political criticism

PM Gordon Brown has criticised Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross for their "inappropriate and unacceptable behaviour" on Brand's radio show.

The BBC and watchdog Ofcom have both launched investigations and the BBC has now received more than 10,000 complaints about the broadcast.

Conservative MP Nigel Evans accused the BBC of being "incredibly supine" in the way it has treated the affair, and has tabled a parliamentary motion saying the behaviour of Brand and Ross was "base and vulgar".

He also said the BBC's director general should step in.

"Mark Thompson, himself, wants to find out why it is that procedures should have been in place to have stopped this sort of thing.

"That... at least the producer should have heard it and said: 'No, this can't go out'.

"Or, indeed, when the initial request went in from Andrew Sachs, that it shouldn't be broadcast - why is it that somebody then listened to the programme and decided that this was acceptable?"

'Risky line'

The comedian Helen Zaltzman, who ran a comedy club where Brand performed before he became famous, told BBC Radio Five Live that it was well-known that Brand and Ross "toe a particularly risky line" and said that was why millions of people listened to their Radio 2 shows.

"I'm sure they regret this trouble. But, I think the reason why Russell Brand is popular is because... he is a liability.

"He was sacked from MTV, he was sacked from XFM.

"This is why people are interested in him as a broadcaster - and why, presumably, he got employed and has a very popular show - about which the majority of people didn't complain."
Meanwhile, Jeremy Hunt, the shadow culture secretary, is to call on broadcasters to take more responsibility for their impact on society, in the wake of the row.

He is to give a speech at the London School of Economics and will say the BBC was "quite wrong" to broadcast the offensive phone calls.

He will also say that it is wrong for broadcasters to make programmes that legitimise negative social behaviour.

Brand, Ross and Auntie Beeb - Place Your Bets

2008-10-28T11:04:00.009Z

Oh dear, oh deary me! It seems dear old Auntie (aka The British Broadcasting Corporation, that bastion of high standards, morals and decency financed by the UK licence payer) has got her bloomers in another twist.

This time the UK national broadcaster is facing calls to sack two of its overpaid and overinflated egos - Russell Brand and Jonathon Ross over live highly offensive comments directed at the much adored actor Andrew Sachs and his grand-daughter.

The situation is so bad with Aunties knickers twisted to almost throttling point that even the UK Broadcast regulator, OFCOM, are ordering an "enquiry" into the repulsive comments broadcast on Radio Two across the UK.

So, dear reader ... place your bets. Will dear old Auntie untwist her massive knickers and fire with no notice BOTH these two sad alleged broadcasters? Or will Auntie give them a smack on the bum and send them to bed with no supper?

"Ofcom says it is going to launch an investigation into Russell Brand's telephone prank to actor Andrew Sachs during his Radio 2 show.

The Fawlty Towers star was called four times by Brand and guest Jonathan Ross on a pre-recorded show on 18 October.

Ofcom said all BBC broadcasters must adhere to its broadcasting code, which sets standards for the content of TV and radio programmes.

The BBC apologised to Mr Sachs on Monday for the "unacceptable" calls.

The actor's agent said Sachs was "very upset" after Brand and Ross left lewd messages about the actor's granddaughter on his voicemail.

Brand himself apologised for the offence on his latest show.

A Radio 2 spokeswoman said on Monday the BBC was "reviewing how this came about" and apologised to listeners for any offence caused."

"The BBC has apologised to actor Andrew Sachs for the "unacceptable and offensive" content of calls made to him by Russell Brand during a radio show.

The Fawlty Towers star was called four times during a prank on Brand's BBC Radio 2 show on 18 October.

The actor's agent said Sachs was "very upset" after Brand and guest Jonathan Ross left lewd messages about the actor's granddaughter on his voicemail.

Brand himself apologised for the offence on his latest show.

He said "you musn't swear on someone's answer phone", but added it was "funny".

A BBC Radio 2 spokeswoman said: "We have received a letter of a complaint from Mr Sachs' agent and would like to sincerely apologise to Mr Sachs for the offence caused.

"We recognise that some of the content broadcast was unacceptable and offensive.

She added: "We are reviewing how this came about and are responding to Mr Sachs personally.

We also apologise to listeners for any offence caused."

Sachs, who played Manuel in Fawlty Towers, was expected to be a guest on the programme, but was unable to appear due to unforeseen circumstances.

Obscene comments

Brand and Ross went on to leave a series of messages on the 78-year-old's voicemail during the two-hour radio show, which included obscene comments about Sachs' 23-year-old granddaughter.

In the first message, Ross suddenly swore and said Brand had slept with her.

He then apologised and said he "got excited".

Later in the programme, Brand said the only way to rectify the incident was to make another call - but caused further offence after he suggested Sachs might kill himself because of the previous message's revelations.

A third call saw Brand and Ross singing an apology to the actor.

Brand sang: "I'd like to apologise for the terrible attacks, Andrew Sachs. I said some things I didn't have oughta [sic], like I had sex with your granddaughter."

During the fourth call, Brand said: "Now when I watch Fawlty Towers I think I'm going to think I've hurt his feelings."

A BBC spokeswoman said the programme had received two complaints related to Ross's swearing - rather than the content of the phone calls - before details of the incident were publicised in a Sunday newspaper.

A further 1585 further complaints have arrived since.

Sachs' agent, Meg Pool, has written a letter to Radio 2 controller Lesley Douglas asking for an unreserved apology.

Ms Pool told BBC News that the actor had passed on his mobile phone number to Brand's production team "in good faith", which the presenter used to contact him during the show.
She added that the actor did not hear the programme, but listened to a recording and was "offended very much indeed" by its content.

Talk show host and Radio 2 presenter Jonathan Ross has now sent a personal apology to the actor and it is understood Brand is planning to do the same.

Earlier this year, Brand apologised for making a hoax call to the police during a stage show in Northampton.

He rang a police line in front of an audience and said he may have spotted a man who was responsible for a series of assaults.

Brand later said he was "devastated by the possibility" that he "may have offended vulnerable people".

The 33-year-old star, who hosted the MTV Music Awards in Los Angeles last month, has been a regular presenter on Radio 2 for almost two years."

Again the Conservatives - Sinking fast by reputation!

2008-10-22T07:03:00.005+01:00

So funny! The Conservative party in the UK don't seemed to have changed in the slightest!

Memories of an age that is not yet, it appears, to be consigned to history.

"The shadow chancellor is likely to face more questions over claims he tried to solicit a £50,000 donation for the Tories from a Russian billionaire.

Financier Nathaniel Rothschild insists George Osborne did discuss a donation from Oleg Deripaska in front of a witness at his Corfu home in August.

He also says Mr Osborne asked about ways to get round the ban on overseas residents donating to UK parties.

Mr Osborne has denied these claims and has been backed by David Cameron.

The Tory leader said the shadow chancellor had shown the "right judgement" by not asking for or taking any money. "

Stay tuned as leading Tories go into panic mode and fight for their precious alleged reputation.

Laugh? You jolly well bet I am!

Wake Me Up Before You Go Go!

2008-10-05T09:07:00.003+01:00

The Malta Independent on Sunday published this today:

by Ian Waugh

I read Charles Flores’ Opinion piece “Joseph, Lazarus and Parliament” (TMIS, 28 September) with the usual enthusiasm, delight and cheeky smirk befitting a man of his writings.

I wholeheartedly agree that Joseph Muscat will bring energy and vigour to proceedings at Parliamentary level. It is just the injection Maltese politics requires. I think this is a clean sweep on many levels and one the current administration should not ignore nor snigger at.

There is nothing worse in politics than complacency. In the dark, dark days of Thatcher the stench of self-satisfaction, smugness and conceit stifled British politics. It wasn’t until 1997 when Labour swept to power that these complacent right-wingers were brushed away with a landmark Labour victory; only then did we have the opportunity to breathe fresh air.

Charles Flores refers to the “ripple effect” that the House of Representatives so urgently deserves. No truer words have been written. Many of my Maltese friends on both sides of the political divide were desperate for change at the last election. Some of these people even surprised me with the strength of their desire. Sadly it wasn’t to be.

Now there is genuine prospect and a light in a stuffy tunnel that needs opening at the earliest opportunity. This new younger brush will undoubtedly sweep through Parliament, and I am sure a new era of lively and exciting debate will ensue.

Maybe a vacant seat in the Strangers’ Gallery will once more become as treasured as the debates themselves. Charles Flores mentions that Lawrence Gonzi “let it go to the dogs”. “The arrogance and complete disregard of parliamentary fairness during the past four years did not go unnoticed with voters at the last election”

I am not a man to give away olive branches at a whim. But if I were a man given just a few seconds then my words would be “Watch your back Lawrence because this is not going to be the easy ride you are accustomed to!”

Ian Waugh, LONDON, UK

A Clean Sweep For Labour in Malta

2008-10-04T10:54:00.002+01:00

Meet Joseph Muscat - a man on a mission. At 34 years old he is the new leader of the Labour Party and the hope for Socialists on the Mediterranean islands of Malta.

Joseph Muscat is a household name for many Maltese and Gozitans.

No stranger to the media, he has hosted and produced a number of television and radio shows and has established himself as a regular political analyst on both Maltese and English language newspapers.

"He is one of the few people in the media who has a sound knowledge of economics, being primarily an economist and a manager. Joseph Muscat also holds a Masters Degree in European Studies and is completing his Ph.D in economics.

"He studied at St Aloysius’ College and was part of a core team that set up the Institute for the Promotion of Small Enterprises, which was established in agreement with the European Union and was granted EU funds for the restructuring of industry. In fact, Joseph was part of the team that secured these EU funds.

"At the age of 29, Joseph was also the youngest person to hold the post of chairman of Labour’s general conference during the sessions which forged the party’s new EU policy. He was also a member of the working group that forged this policy. During the past years he helped secure EU funds for a number of Maltese and Gozitan organisations."

The Malta Independent Online:

Muscat sworn in as MP and Opposition leader
by Michael Carabott

In a very warm ceremony filled with goodwill from both sides of the house and the President of Malta, former MEP Joseph Muscat yesterday assumed the mantle of Opposition leader after taking his oath of allegiance to the President and the House of Representatives.Dr Muscat, looking slightly taken aback by events, officially replaced Joseph Cuschieri in parliament as a fully fledged co-opted MP.

The motion to co-opt Dr Muscat was put forward by Prime Minister Lawrence Gonzi and was seconded by Malta Labour Party deputy leader for parliamentary affairs Anglu Farrugia. Addressing the House, Dr Gonzi said: “It is my pleasure and a privilege to put this motion forward. This is not the first co-option this house has seen, but it indeed unique to co-opt Dr Muscat as leader of the Malta Labour Party and (now) Opposition leader.

I wish Joe well. I would also like to thank outgoing opposition leader Charles Mangion who has filled this post since the resignation of his predecessor. He took it in his stride and is an example to us all.”Dr Gonzi urged the House to approve the motion unanimously. Dr Farrugia also spoke briefly and thanked the Prime Minister for his words. He thanked Dr Mangion and of course Joe Cuschieri. “It is true that Joseph Muscat has been co-opted but he has already passed two electoral tests in the European Parliament and of course the MLP leadership election,” he said.

The motion was unanimously passed after which Dr Mangion and Dr Gonzi walked down the aisle separating the two sides to usher Dr Muscat in. In a relaxed manner, Dr Muscat took his oath of allegiance to the parliament and proceeded to shake the hand of every MP in the house. Dr Muscat spoke briefly and his first words were of thanks to Joseph Cuschieri for his sense of loyalty to the MLP and the country as a whole. “I also want to thank Charles Mangion for his sterling work.

I want to thank Dr Alfred Sant for the years of service he gave to this country. We should admire his incorruptibility and I hope I can live up to that reputation,” said Dr Muscat.He also thanked MP George Vella for his words of guidance and advice as well his wife and family for their support. “Without the support of our families, we are nothing,” he said.Dr Muscat said the past and future differences between the two parties never have or will involve malice. “The common denominator is that whether on one side or another, we all have Malta's best interests at heart,” he said.

Dr Gonzi welcomed Dr Muscat officially and said he hoped that his party and the opposition could continue to work for a better Malta. “Each and every MP has good intentions and wants to offer a service. Please God, when we have to leave this arena, we can all look back and see that we have done some good,” he said.Dr Gonzi continued: “We have an opportunity to open a new chapter in Malta's history. When we argue and debate in parliament, people must understand that it is passion, it is passion to see the best possible outcome for our country.” Speaker of the House Louis Galea also congratulated Dr Muscat on his becoming and MP. Dr Muscat was then whisked off to the office of the President. He took the oath of allegiance to uphold the Constitution of Malta without fear or favour. His wife Michelle beamed with pride as a very relaxed ceremony was presided over by President Eddie Fenech Adami.Dr Fenech Adami said that this was a rare occasion. “Opposition leaders come and go. But your political career has been meteoric. You were an MEP in Brussels and you became leader of the MLP before becoming and MP. I praise you for your courage in assuming tis role at such a young age,” he said.Dr Fenech Adami concluded: “I do not know your wife much but she has supported you. Believe me, you will need her support.” Dr Muscat thanked the President for his “kind comments” and proceeded to have a private meeting with him.

Watch out Gordon ... they're out to get you!

2008-08-03T12:09:00.009+01:00

The knives are being sharpened ... the spin is in full throttle ... words like "support" do nothing to allay speculation that Gordon Brown's days as Labour Leader and Prime Minister could be numbered.

A Cabinet reshuffle could be on the cards but no former Prime Minister has ever recovered from such damaging opinion polls and agitation from the back benches.

The question is ... what can we in the party do to save this Labour government this time? Or is the prospect of Labour in opposition now definitely on the cards? A repeat scenario of Thatcher and Major?

Another dark nightmarish period of right wing silliness, sleaze and scandal is too scary at this stage to contemplate.

Be afraid - be really afraid!

BBC News:

Ministers rally to support Brown

Three cabinet ministers have rallied to the prime minister's defence, insisting he is the right man for the job.

Alistair Darling, Harriet Harman and John Denham have declared their support for the beleaguered Gordon Brown.

Skills secretary Mr Denham told BBC One Mr Brown had a "profound understanding of what this country needs".

Meanwhile, former transport minister Stephen Byers echoed an earlier call from Foreign Secretary David Miliband for Labour to start afresh.

The Guardian:

Blair slams 'vacuous' Brown in leaked note

Tony Blair. Photograph: Martin Argles

Tony Blair accused Gordon Brown of generating 'hubris and vacuity' in a devastating private memo analysing his mistakes, which last night threatened to blow a hole in the heart of government.

The former prime minister believed his successor had presided over a 'lamentable confusion of tactics and strategy', attacking Blair's record instead of building on it and failing to spell out an agenda for the future, according to the scathing note penned after last September's chaotic Labour party conference. Such tactics would not win the next election, he concluded.

The note leaked to the Mail on Sunday newspaper now threatens to trigger open warfare within New Labour, with its emergence so soon after David Miliband's broadside against the Prime Minister which was seen as part of an orchestrated plot to destabilise Brown by those loyal to his predecessor.

Cameron reunited with stolen bike

2008-07-27T10:43:00.007+01:00

BBC NEWS Politics Cameron reunited with stolen bike

Headline should read:

SILLY TORY IN MISSING BIKE HORROR!

Shock! Front Wheel Missing!

The bad news is that this man can resume causing more chaos on our roads in London whilst thinking up new ways of senselessly patronising the Prime Minister.

Heaven help Great Britain if these losers ever get back into power! You think its bad now - cast your mind to the last time the Tory twits ran the UK!

Is this the London we want?

2008-07-11T14:45:00.001+01:00

When will all this killing end?

Four stabbed to death on same day

Four men, including a teenager, were stabbed to death in London, in one day.

A 19-year-old died during at attack in Edmonton, north London, while two men in their 20s were killed in Leyton and Walthamstow, east London.

A man in his 40s was found fatally wounded in Tottenham High Road, Tottenham, north London.

A fifth man died on Thursday in a stabbing in West Bromwich, West Midlands. On Friday, a man was stabbed in Willesden, north-west London.

Zimbabwe Is Dying

2008-07-06T11:02:00.007+01:00

Message to all people reading this blog:

go to this website: http://astsolutions.co.za/zimbabwe/

read it, show support and start praying.

Just do it.

Democracy Zimbabwe Style

2008-06-28T09:02:00.011+01:00

The sick sad joke that was the Zimbabwe's Presidential Election has taken place with citizens of that beautiful country being forced to vote.

In case you don't know - the choice in this democratic farce is:

Mugabe, Mugabe or Mugabe.

And, because Mugabe believes all of us in the real world are complete idiots, it's widely predicted that (surprise, surprise) Mugabe is the clear winner.

Wow! When I heard the result I was completely shocked - my goodness what a surprise! Still, that's democracy for you! I had my money on the other candidate - but silly me, there wasn't another candidate!

Incidentally - If you are thinking of going to Zimbabwe make sure you take an extra suitcase for the volume of cash you will need. At the precise time of writing this blog entry the current exchange rate is:

Saturday, June 28, 2008 - Exchange Rate
1 Euro = 16,901,252 Zimbabwe Dollar 1 Zimbabwe Dollar (ZWD) = 0.00000006 Euro (EUR)

Mugabe - you have ruined your once prosperous nation and you have brought your own good people (the very same people who dreamed a dream 25 years ago) to their feet. How does it feel to have the entire world hate you ? Which way now ? You are isolating your people - what's the next move Mugabe ? Where do you want to go now ?

More pain ? More threats ? More torture ? More killing ? More destruction ? More intimidation ? More media manipulation ?

Watching You - Watching Me

2008-06-23T07:00:00.008+01:00

"We live in a surveillance society. It is pointless to talk about surveillance society
in the future tense. In all the rich countries of the world everyday life is suffused
with surveillance encounters, not merely from dawn to dusk but 24/7. Some encounters obtrude into the routine, like when we get a ticket for running a red light when no one was around but the camera. But the majority are now just part of the fabric of daily life. Unremarkable".
(November 2006: Surveillance society - full report)

With violence, knife crime, gun crime and the overall fear of people on the streets in the UK seemingly on the increase (or at least given greater media prominence) there is suddenly a call for local councils to review their policies towards surveillance.

But the the question is - are we feeling safer with the vast numbers of CCTV cameras on our streets? If, like me, you have nothing to hide and don't care if a man in a remote security office can see me walking down my street or into a shop - then fair enough.

To be absolutely honest, I am all for this use of technology. If crime can detected electronically and used as evidence in court, then fantastic. If terrorists who seem hell bent on blowing us up on the train, in the tube or on the bus then I feel that detection at this level is absolutely vital at so many levels.

Today BBC News is reporting:

"The Regulation of Investigatory Powers (RIP) Act, part of the government's anti-terror drive, gave councils the power to use the surveillance and to access phone and e-mail records.
But concerns have been raised about the way some councils have used the powers.
Recent examples include a family in Dorset followed for several weeks to see if they really did live in a school catchment area. Other uses have included examining rubbish to monitor household waste."

From where I am sat this is all part of a larger more nasty side of our society whereby people are getting nervous about walking freely on our streets. Children armed with knifes and guns haunt our streets. There are people living in Britain who want to cause serious injury and death in the name of terrorism. This is the scary life we lead in today's UK and the more we can do to combat and keep an eye on these horrors the better as far as I am concern.

Many disagree - many feel that government and local government are or can take advantage. Small price in my view.

Mugabe - You have broken so many hearts

2008-06-19T07:14:00.004+01:00

The highlight of my career is an amazing event for me some years ago when I was sent to work for the Zimbabwe Broadcasting Corporation as a broadcast adviser.

When I arrived the country was a thriving, optimistic and relatively happy nation - relaxed and comparatively prosperous compared to today. My mission was to oversee the redevelopment of the national English language radio station, Radio 3. After familiarising myself with the presenters and producers we got to work on 'reinventing' the station. To date this was the biggest and most satisfying consultancy project I had been involved with and definitely the most exciting.

Between us we managed to rebuild the station and retrain the presenters with a streamlined and popular format. This meant prioritising certain programming and creating a more user friendly schedule whilst creating opportunities for advertisers.

Radio 3 was relaunched within about a month and had an instant national impact on Zimbabwe.

The impact on the audience was instant as was the interest from advertising agencies. However none of this success would have been possible without the camaraderie of the dedicated team of presenters and producers who worked under tremendous pressure to improve and popularise their station.

For me the sense of satisfaction was the genuine smile, humour and real friendship which was created out of all this. Above all this I fell instantly in love with Zimbabwe and the Zimbabweans who embraced the plans and ideas with open arms as well as showing such genuine friendship to me personally. This impact on my life and my career was instant and indelible.

Twenty two years on the skeleton of Radio 3 lives on, the concepts, optimism and creativity has evaporated and as for the dear friends I made - I have absolutely no idea what became of them. Today the ZBC is in a stranglehold with President Mugabe's regime. Over recent years I have sent messages out to websites to try and find out what became of my colleagues and friends - but the silence has been deafening.

When I was working in Zimbabwe I was welcomed with open arms - today Mugabe has slandered the British government, the British people and the foreign media. Friendship from his point of view has turned to bitterness and hatred. Thankfully, I know the Zimbabwe mentality well and I know that he might be able to starve his people but he can't fool them.

As many who know me professionally - there is nothing that angers me more than anything than political and governmental interference in broadcasting. Over the years I have witnessed and personally experienced gross political tampering in broadcasting. On the tiny islands of Malta the state broadcasting system was wrecked by political fiddling which resulted in the famous cop-out with the opening of politically operated stations. I used to get privately very annoyed when I dared approach the subject with certain people alleging that I didn't know what I was talking about! In other countries politicians have tried and in many cases failed to play in broadcasting. In Zimbabwe the political hold on broadcasting is now terrifying:

BBC News:

Zimbabwe's public broadcaster ZBC has said it will no longer carry campaign adverts from the opposition party ahead of next week's presidential election.

The Movement for Democratic Change said it would appeal against the decision.
Justice Minister Patrick Chinamasa defended the move saying international coverage favoured the MDC and never reported the ruling Zanu-PF's position (19 June 2008).

With the Zimbabwe election re-runs scheduled for next week, I now deeply fear the future for many Zimbabweans - to say nothing of the manipulation of their national media.

It's too late to hope that blood will not be wasted - because it already has.

It's hopeless to wish that the Zimbabweans will not suffer - they have been horribly intimidated and suffering for years.

While the world looks on, a day never passes when I do not pause and think of the appalling loss of life, the dreadful treatment, the starvation, the desperation, the hour-by-hour worry, the outrageous inflation, the disappearance of optimism and the vanished smile on the faces of the people I fell so in love with.

Big Brother - UK National Television Hits A New Low

2008-06-06T07:24:00.011+01:00

Just as level-headed regular UK television viewers are recovering from the horrors of EuroVision the stupid season continues with more bland nastiness all in the dreaded name of “Big Brother” – a horrific programme, ghastly labelled by millionaire producers as “reality television”.

Why on earth I would want to spend my time watching the ins, the outs, the trivia, the loves, the hates and the darn-right annoying of these wannabe Z Class Celebrities is beyond me.

With dangers and worries of another season of racism and general xenophobia on the horizon, the boys and girls at Ofcom (the UK broadcast regulator) must be on red alert for the coming weeks.

Indeed after 9 years I guess the makers of this rubbish presumably guess they must be doing something right by transmitting this crap to a nation whom the programme makers must assume are all idiots.

All this from Channel Four who are “arguing its case for a £150m annual public subsidy”. A station which has earned considerable praise for being brave and diverse in its all important content.
For those outside the UK it is quite possible that the “Big Brother” format has been inflicted on your country or desperately copied by some reckless television station near you.

What really gets firmly up my nose is the assumption by the programme producers that we are all completely stupid. We will simply accept any old rubbish transmitted by a national terrestrial/digital licence-holder. Worse still is that British broadcasting is still held with a degree of respect beyond these shores. So, when some of us are ever outside the UK – how do we answer questions like, “I always thought British broadcasting was almost the best – so why do you broadcast this sort of rubbish?” It’s a tough call and a question I find I can barely answer with a degree of authority.

This trash churns my stomach in so many ways – with any luck this season will implode within itself and the whole concept will be consigned to history categorised as: Nasty Rubbish We’d Rather Forget.

The Sun:

BIG Brother bosses last night labelled this year’s contestants the weirdest bunch yet.
Sixteen people from the fringes of society entered the house for the start of 13 gruelling weeks.
BB9 includes an ALBINO former gangster, a SEX-MAD body-building couple and a BLIND cross-dressing comedian.
Show chief Phil Edgar Jones claimed viewers could expect the best series yet.

He said: “The characters this year are like you have never seen before.

“These are people you’d never meet in real life. We combed Britain for the most amazing people you could encounter. It’s going to be fireworks.”

The Independent:

Tonight, for the ninth year in a row, the presenter Davina McCall will bound enthusiastically on to our television screens to unveil this year's Big Brother contestants, including a Muslim convert, a Thai Buddhist and a reformed gangster who was deported from America.

But who will be watching? And as Channel 4 argues its case for a £150m annual public subsidy, is the ageing reality TV show really the kind of programme it should be making?
Viewing figures for last year's series were the worst ever, averaging just 3.8 million compared with an average of 4.5 million viewers in 2006. And the show has been struck by a series of rows over racism and bullying.

EuroVision Back-Slapping Contest 2008

2008-05-25T09:44:00.003+01:00

Last year I was accused of being 'rude' and 'unfair' in my comments about that silly little singing competition where lots of EuroVision member countries compete to sing their hearts out.

This year this 'rude' and 'unfair' blogger went to extraordinary lengths to watch the long, long, ever so boring semi-finals and then forgo a documentary on political Britain in the late 50's / early 60's for the mind numbing 195 minute all screaming, hyper camp and ever so tedious final.

I went through this televisual hell because I wanted to understand what all the fuss, bitching and excitement was all about in 2008.

My distinct memories of this contest were in the 1960's when my family and I all sat down to wonder at the flickering pictures beamed onto our 405 line television from some exotic part of continental Europe. We'd then wander in certain amazement at the cultural offerings from these Europeans. In those days it all seemed so fair and honest somehow. But I guess as a boy growing up in middle class England most things seemed unquestionable and 'fair' somehow - you never really questioned, you trusted and you accepted. That was my adolescent life somehow.

The EuroVision Song Contest of modern day Europe seems as related to it's original concept as I am related to you or your neighbour.

The voting may seem bizarre to any normal level-headed human being but if your neighbour is competing and you (for the sake of argument) rely on him for oil or gas, or if you want to keep him sweet for whatever reason, you are bound to vote for him - it's human nature. As for the song - who cares?

In fact why not save valuable airtime, creativity and empty hopes and simply ditch the songs altogether and replace the current concept with a glorified back-slapping contest.

Simply vote for your favourite EuroVision member country - then sit down for three hours on a Saturday evening and watch a highly incestuous feast of why these nations are so popular and adored by their neighbours. Then during the last hour we'll go to all the presentation and continuity studios across Europe to hear the votes from the individual countries - ensuring of course that each presentation announcer gives a firm pat on the back to host country for "such a marvelous show - the best show in the history of EuroVision".

Yes! Yet another brilliant television concept from Ian Waugh!

Meanwhile - the future of the UK in the contest is now seriously in question - I wonder if I'll be blogging on this next year at this time?

Vote now and don't forget your calls could cost you your credibility - terms and conditions kind of apply.

The Madness of EuroVision

2008-05-24T09:43:00.008+01:00

With the EuroVision 2008 final only hours away - a continent waits with breathe bated. Indeed as I sit here at my desk banging out these words I can feel the tension from within the United Kingdom and across the channel. Not for generations have the people of Europe felt such a feeling of anticipation. My goodness the tension is as unbearable as passing a kidney stone.

If only this were true! Because it clearly isn't!

This year I wanted to get an overall perspective of this creative multi-cultural feast. So I actually dedicated real time to viewing the semi-finals. Two hours each evening viewing the over zealous, the outright rubbish, the camp, the genuine talent and the darn-right stupid all blended into this screamingly silly waste of broadcasting air-time.

I had my fiver placed firmly on Malta's entry - Vodka. An excellent, well-written, well-produced and superbly performed song swept away as an instant memory. When I see crap like the Latvian attempt - "Pirates of the Sea" given preference to real talent then I know for sure I haven't lost my marbles alltogether! It reinforces my overall opinion that this Song Contest is a complete and utter waste of time.

So what is The EuroVision Song Contest these days?
Is it a means of displaying genuine talent?
Is it a method of bringing EuroVision member countries closer together?
Maybe a way of projecting national and European identity?
Is it some sort of pan European joke?
Or is it a vehicle for member nations to point fun and ridicule other nations?

It's a gross embarrassment for genuine entrants like the Maltese. It causes serious damage to the overall national image of countries who aren't talently recognised and especially for this small and well-meaning nation.

Taking Malta's position with the contest - it has nothing to do with the local selection board, it's members or the talent that competes locally to represent the Republic. It's no good pointing fingers locally. It's no good bitching endlessly in the vain hope of gaining certain personal local kudos. Because of the nature of the contest there are decisions taken outside Malta that are beyond Maltese control.

The fact of the matter is that the overall EuroVision Song Contest has turned into a total confusing fiasco where the genuine talent avoid it like the plague for fear of professional tarnish.

If your national pride is at stake. If your country's credibility is on show. If you respect your cultural identity. With the best will in the world and the most fantastic talent - my advice is to walk quietly and respectfully away from this gory and currently exceedingly embarrassing contest.

You should avoid this public relations fiasco until such time as the organisers of the semis and finals have stopped taking the piss out of well meaning and intelligent countries who respect their national pride and identity more than being associated with a cheap, tacky and rather nasty (and long-term damaging) talent contest.

In the mean time the final is tonight. I wish my home country well whilst I commiserate with certain nations who must be asking themselves: "Why?"

Brace yourself ... EuroVision 2008 is on the horizon!

2008-05-19T08:52:00.012+01:00

Its that time of year again, whilst Spring has sprung, the birds are singing in the garden, the FA Cup has been and gone - Summer is tantalising us on the horizon - oh! what joys this time of year brings!

Except, around the corner, looming like a big unpredictable camp and slightly silly monster is the image of EuroVision 2008!

Last year I moaned about the lack of appearance by the brilliant Maltese entry. Strangely (maybe it's something to do with the air, maybe too much sun ... who knows) the normally peaceful and intelligent Maltese take EuroVision very, very seriously indeed. Websites and blogs are full to bursting with moans and counter-moans about how this is all handled locally - the bitching, back biting and insults abound like nothing else, from the selection to the actual board who run Malta's representation at this contest. In fact the whinging is almost as entertaining as the big night itself with more Maltese 'EuroVision Experts' than you can wave a stick at

Chill-out you guys .... please!

Personally as a mere punter I think Malta stands a very good chance and wish them all the very best. You can go their Official Malta EuroVision website here.

This year the Republic of Malta's entry is fantastically feisty, strong, very Mediterranean and high representative of today's Malta. Still not convinced? Still think tiny little Malta has no hope? Well, dear reader, here is the mouse that's going to roar at EuroVision 2008 from Morena with 'Vodka'. Incidentally very big congratulations to the crew and producers of this really brilliant video:

Meanwhile it looks the UK learnt a few lessons from last year's fiasco. "BBC One viewers have picked Andy Abraham and 'Even If' to represent the UK in the 2008 Eurovision Song Contest in Serbia" (so says the BBC):

Just in case you thought EuroVision 2008 has taken on an air of partial sophistication don't count your chickens ... here, for all you happy sailors, is the Latvian attempt - called "Pirates of the Sea":

Well at least you can smile about it ... for those obssessing - why not stop taking it so seriously for all our sakes!

As for me - I'll order up my annual supply of tranquillisers, pain killers and Gin - who knows what feast of glitz, naffness and complete rubbish we are going to be inflicted with this year!