life according to the prp

Confessions Of A Pillow Snob

2009-07-13T20:22:00.000-07:00

Cherry-O, Kiz here.

We're currently in Boise, rounding out Week 3 of On The Road Again with the J clan and I have to say, we are all surviving the madness quite nicely. Since June 27th, I have slept in my own bed a shocking 4 times which means that my back is all sorts of jacked up because I haven't had my own pillow out here on the road but I am bumbling along. I miss my pillow. And my bed. And an eating regimen that covers more than just the carb and sugar group.

I also miss the cable to my camera which is currently brimming with photos of Sienna's Birthday Party! and the Fourth of July! And my Mom's Birthday! And a Week At Seaside! And a Nine Hour Trip Across Oregon! But I can't show you any of them because I don't have the stupid cable.

(Note to self: Pack the Stupid Cable.)

All the adults here in Boise are currently playing MarioKart on the Wii and as much as I enjoy watching them, I decided to use this time to sneak away to the computer. I am tempted to watch hour after hour of downloaded TV because I am completely behind on my summer addictions (AKA SYTYCD and The Bachelorette) but I fear I won't get the full effect of the dances or the intensity of yet another rose ceremony on this little screen. To all my friends back home, I will be back on Friday but please don't call me until Monday as I've got some serious TV watching to do.

Our time in Boise so far has been perfect as we haven't really done anything. We've laid around and laughed and that's about it. Today, the Rizz and I made a quick trip to the mall as I was itching to go to the Downeast Basics Store. (If you don't know what that is, then clearly you aren't LDS and you are seriously missing out.) They have some incredibly cute stuff in stock right now and the weirdest thing happened while I was there....every single thing I tried on not only fit, but looked cute! This is a rarity for me and one I thoroughly enjoyed. After making my purchases there, I wandered across the way to the largest Forever 21 store known to man. It. was. massive. Rizz parked himself on a bench outside and told me to "take as long as I needed" which was a mistake on his part because I could literally still be there now. They had tons of cute stuff, mixed in among tons of crap, but I was once again happy with everything I tried on. I finally settled on a purchase and stood in line among every 17-23 year old in the Treasure Valley which caused me to abandon my purchase. Because the store isn't called Forever 34 now is it? I panicked, thinking I was too "old" for the silly little white eyelet dress that would be perfect for Cabo and ran out of the store like a 15 year old boy caught looking at the wrong section of magazines.

As soon as we got home home I told Brad that I regretted not getting the dress because it DID look cute and I'm NOT too old and it WOULD be perfect for Cabo. And my husband? On his way back out to Beath Manor to put Austin to bed? He went back to Forever 21 and bought me my dress.

He really is that good.

So now I have cute clothes and a huge smile and a husband I love more than my pillow, and that's saying something.

A Brief Respite

2009-07-03T09:11:00.000-07:00

We're home from week one of our three week tour of the northwest which will take us through three states in three weeks. It's a bit hectic but we're all together and loving every minute of it.

In the 72 hours that I am home right now, I will make a birthday cake (done!) throw a party for 10 4 year olds, do mountains of laundry, unpack the car, repack the car, celebrate the fourth, stop in and see the Mormon's on Sunday and head out again first thing Monday morning. Such is life when you're married to a school teacher. Luckily, we're both crazy enough to absolutely love it.

Thanks for the good times Seattle. Seaside, here we come!

Happy fourth everyone. Be safe!

Physical Progression

2009-06-26T10:04:00.000-07:00

On Monday morning my trusty bike and I covered 10 1/2 miles in 55 minutes. I felt pretty smug.

On Tuesday morning my trusty bike and I rode the same route but I drafted behind the Rizz and managed to shave almost 11 minutes off my time. I felt real smug.

This morning my trusty bike and I rode the route alone again and I beat our time but 22 seconds. The climb up 44 is horrid, my legs are on fire, but I am real, real smug with myself.

Next week's goal? 15 miles in under an hour. Wish me luck!

Summer In Pictures, Part 1

2009-06-25T09:19:00.001-07:00

The big kids wanted Austin's cake to look like a watch since it's one of his very favorite things to play with. I took the easy way out and did this...Austin and big kids were thrilled. (The time is set to 1:30 since that's when he was born. Aren't I a genius???)

The day after Austin's birthday was Brad's birthday so we headed to Red Robin to celebrate. Austin was clearly worn out from the previous day's activities.

That night was the Father-N-Son's camp out, so while the boys were away, the girls did play. We had a few friends over for some quality girl time, complete with homemade pizza, pedicures, Barbie movies and ice cream sundaes.

On Saturday night, to commemorate the Rizz hitting his mid-thirties, I had some friends over to celebrate. My plan was to take pictures of everyone who came, the food that was made and the good times that were had. This is the only shot of the night, taken before everyone arrived and before my hair had been done. Maybe next year?

In between all the fun stuff we've been up to, whenever we have down time, our kids can be found doing this. I love it!

Summer is definitely off to a great start!

Thity-Five.

2009-06-19T10:49:00.001-07:00

To my adorable husband, who after I told him that our surprise golf outing was canceled because of the rain (Rain! In June!) said, "why don't we finish working on the yard? I don't care what we do as long as we do it together," I wish you the happiest of birthdays. You are stellar in every aspect of your life and I thank you for challenging me to keep up. I love you.

Love,
Kiz

One.

2009-06-18T07:03:00.000-07:00

Dear Austin,

To the boy who has completed me as a mother, showed me what I'm good at and all I have yet to learn, happy birthday. Every inch of you makes me proud...proud to have an able body that could carry four children, proud to have been given the opportunity to be a mother, proud of what we're doing as a family, proud that I listened to the not-so-gentle nudge that told me you needed to come. I love you in every way imaginable. Happy Birthday, sweet boy.

Love,
Mama

The First Trip Of The Summer

2009-06-15T16:14:00.000-07:00

Wanna know why we look like this?

Because the rest of the car looked like this:

After racing out of school on Friday, we surprised the kids with a quick trip to Portland with their favorite cousins. Rich and Tiff and their crew and Matt and Jen and their two met up with us for a fun filled weekend to celebrate a few big happenings in our family: 1) Great Grandpa Jim's 85th birthday and his first trip to the temple 2) Uncle Matty's birthday 3) Lily's first birthday 4) Austin's first birthday and finally 5) Brad's 35th birthday! We basically celebrated all weekend long and ate our weight in cake. The kids swam every spare second and we laughed and loved our time together. Our kids adore their cousins and it is so fun to see them all together. Grandpa Jim was thrilled that we all made the trip to be with him and it made for a fantastic weekend. I hope we can make it an annual event!

Because Once Just Wasn't Enough...

2009-06-11T07:20:00.001-07:00

I'm off to see the Wizard again, this time with one of my favorite little munchkins in tow.

She's been completely obsessed with the soundtrack since I listen to it day and night and sings all the songs by heart. My mom and original BFF are coming as well and I cannot wait. This year's culture experience? Done.

Now we just have to wait until October. Don't mention it to the munchkin if you should see her. I'm waiting until, say September to break the good news or else we'll have a VERY long summer on our hands....

The View From Two Wheels

2009-06-09T09:30:00.000-07:00

I've been wanting to up my game a bit this week and do some special things for the kids to commemorate the last week of school. In years past, this would ALWAYS mean an edible sort of treat or special thing, but since I am trying to think like a skinny person now, I needed some new ideas.

At about 7:30 this morning, I got the brilliant idea that we should all ride our bikes to school. My kids LOVE to ride their bikes and spend most every afternoon cruising around the neighborhood. Even Sienna, with her little legs and "Let's Go! Barbie Go!" bike pedals away the afternoon. I told the kids my plan and they were ecstatic. Since my kids don't attend our neighborhood school, this meant we had a 20-25 minute ride to look forward to.

Just before 8, I went out to the garage to get everything ready. My bike was still on the rollers where I usually ride each morning and I needed to hook up the trailer to it.

This is where my plan started to tank.

I twisted and pulled and reefed and yanked on those silly knobs and I COULD NOT get them to loosen so I could unlatch my bike. I got out the pliers and pulled harder. I put on some gloves and twisted stronger. I called my husband for some words of encouragement. I could not budge those stupid knobs!

This is also where my kids started to freak out. They were SO EXCITED at the idea of riding up to school. They had gotten ready in record time and had done everything I had asked them to do. Spence was trying to help with the knobs and Hannah was taking care of Austin. She disappeared into the house for a minute and when she came back, I was finally able to loosen the knobs and free the bike. (She later told me she had gone inside to say a quick prayer that we could ride to school and that I would be strong enough to loosen the knobs. Such a sweet girl.)

Next thing you know, we're off! Austin and Sienna are in the trailer, Hannah and Spence are leading the way and I am feeling like mother of the year. We made it to the end of the street before Spencer's shoelace got stuck in his pedal and down he went. He hopped right back up (after tucking in his laces) and rode on.

About halfway through our ride, Hannah started to lag behind. At first I encouraged her to keep up but found it odd and she's usually the leader of the back. That girl is built just like her Mama which means her hind quarters are powerful and she never has trouble staying with the pack. I kept slowing down and she kept falling back and when I finally stopped to wait for her, I saw the problem.

Her back tire was completely flat. And we were no where near the school. Or our house.

Sweet.

Spence had circled back to see what was going on and Hannah decided to keep plugging away. I was so proud of her determination! And since I'm the idiot who forgot the pump, we really didn't have much choice. Spence rode behind Hannah and cheered her on the whole way.

"You're doing great Hannah! We're almost there! You are so strong!"

I rode in front with tears running down my face.

About a half mile from the school, Hannah couldn't go any more. Her little legs had ridden the bike as far as they could and she was exhausted. While I tried to figure out how to get Hannah and her bike into the trailer along side Squish and The Captain, Spence came up with a solution.

"I'll ride Hannah's bike to give her a break Mom and she can ride mine." He hopped down, lowered the seat for Hannah and away they went.

I watched them for a moment in complete awe at my children. Spence selflessly helped his sister in her literal hour of need, not caring that he was now going to ride up to the school in front of all of his friends on a pink ladybug bike and Hannah graciously took her brother's help. "Thanks Spence," she called, "you are the hero of the day!"

We pulled up to the school a few minutes late and after parking his bike, he came to help Hannah. They got their backpacks out of the trailer and walked hand-in-hand into the school. I followed behind with the little ones completely in love with my kids.

Today's treat was indeed the most special of all. I think I'll make some homemade peanut butter cups and celebrate my children all day long.

Recipe For A Perfect Weekend

2009-06-08T14:15:00.000-07:00

*Lifelong friends

*A deserving birthday girl
*Asparagus
*Wrongly spelled words that say just the right thing
*Late nights
*Later mornings
*Brisk walks
*An adorable newborn
*Cheesy chick flicks
*Movie theater popcorn
*Laughing til it hurts
*Crying til it's better
*Raisinettes
*A gracious host
*Four silly girls who still think they're 15
*A friendship that transcends all and is worth everything

Thanks ladies for another weekend that gave me everything I needed and more.
I love you all.

Progress

2009-06-04T10:24:00.001-07:00

Do you see that?

That's me, turning my head to the left, something I haven't been able to do since Saturday. Hooray for chiropractors and seriously buff massage therapists. I still have one isolated spot of pretty decent pain, but for the most part, I am up and at em.

In other news, The Captain has entered the world of big boyness and now rides facing forward. The older kids have been acting like it's the greatest accomplishment of all time.

"Good job Witt! You've finally managed to eat your weight in cottage cheese and now you can roll like the rest of us!"

(Witt is Austin's official nickname and the kids rarely call him anything else. It is derived for Little Man, which became Wittle Man, and now, because the planets aligned and my kids played limbo under Saturn's rings, he is now Witt, or more commonly The Witt. I have no control over these things.
Brad is often the worst offender. I'm more partial to The Captain but usually call him Buzz. What is it with our family and nicknames?)

Tomorrow morning I leave for The West Side to spend 2 1/2 glorious days in the glow of my dear friends and mother. Erica is the last of us to turn 34 and we will be celebrating all weekend in style. No kids (except the adorable Maya who is about 2 seconds old and a ball of perfection) no husbands, no schedule. Cannot wait. The weekend should provide me with enough blogging material for weeks to come.

See you next week!

A Literal Pain In The Neck

2009-06-02T17:58:00.000-07:00

Here's the thing about pain: it's really freaking painful.

Do you feel enlightened somehow?

And I don't really understand pain. It has no rhyme or reason. For example, you can birth a baby and go through the most horrendous pain of your life and then be almost completely over it once you hear the words "the shoulders are out!" But you can have the tiniest little hangnail on your ring finger that will drive you batty for days and will cause you to beg for mercy from the Good Lord above.

It makes no sense.

So my back. It's been killing me for days now. I can't really look to the right. I can't really look to the left. I certainly can't look down and don't even get me started on looking up. And you know what I did to cause this? This feeling of having an elephant park it's badonkadonk on my neck and poke at my shoulder blades with a 275 degree hot dog skewer?

I glanced at the clock.

I woke up Saturday morning, listened to my quiet house for a moment and wondered what time it was. I know! I thought. I will risk life and limb by glancing at the clock! So I did, and as I turned to the right, my upper back went snap-crackle-pop-crunch-crack-bing-bang-walla-walla-bingbang. And then I couldn't move.

Brad was out for an early morning ride and I laid in bed trying to figure out how to A) get out of bed, B) how to get my jammies on (oh-la-la) and C) how to lift Captian Weighs-A-Ton of the Peanut Butter Gang out of his crib.

And I didn't really have time to have a non-functioning back on Saturday because we were booked solid all day long. Baseball followed by school picnic followed by colleagues birthday dinner. So I layered on the Icy Hot and tried to go throughout the day.

By Sunday, it was worse. ( Hooray!) But my step-mother-in-law (say that three times fast) who is also a nurse visited for a few hours and she spent some time trying to massage the boulders out of my neck. It felt delightful while she was doing and felt horrible once she stopped. I hadn't slept much the night before due to the heinous pain so by Sunday night, after heating and icing and rubbing and lathering, I turned to the big guns: HYDROCODONE. It has always worked like a charm for me because it A) takes away the pain and B) knocks me out.

It did neither.

Monday morning found me calling the doctor begging for a muscle relaxer. At first they wanted me to come in but I told them I didn't think it was safe for me to get on the freeway since the range of motion of my head was approximately .2 degrees. They agreed and sent Flexeril to my rescue.

Ah! Flexeril! How I love thee! You saw me through my last two pregnanices when mondo belly was out of control. You loosened me up and made me sleep. You are my very own Holy Grail of Pharmaceuticals.

Just to be sure my good friend Flexeril would have some support, I slid more hydrocodone into the mix and waited. Waited for the pain to go away. Waited for sleep to come. Waited for my back to once again be a part of my body.

Yeah, about that. Nothing ever happened.

(Insert expletive here.)

I repeatedly rolled from side to side thinking that at some point, I would relieve the pressure and pain and fall fast asleep. But I didn't. At four this morning, I hauled my exhausted back busted body out of bed and watched The Bachelorette. (Is it just me or does everyone want to punch Wes and Dave in the face?)

At 8 am sharp, after being awake for four hours, I called the doctor's office and begged to be seen. Something had to be done because the pain was horrifying and my lack of sleep was equally horrifying. While I waited for them to call me back, I swung by a local chiropractors office to see what they could do.

Now I've never been to a chiropractor. They kind of freak me out. I've always thought that I would be that one person who tenses up at the exact moment they crack your back and I would end of paralyzed. But I was desperate.

They worked me in almost right away and I have to say, it helped. He did an x-ray and discovered that two bones of my rib cage are smashed together which is causing the concentrated spot of pain. Dr. Chiropractor said "do you carry anything heavy on your left side?"

Um, Captain Weighs-A-Ton? He's talking to you.

After much pushing and deep breathing and cracking and rubbing, and a few minutes with the "jackhammer" he sent me home. No more heat, he said. Lots of ice, lots of ibuprofen, lots of rest. I returned later in the afternoon for a repeat exam because the pain was so intense and I'm off again to see him in the morning. He said it may take two weeks for it to be completely better to which I replied "Hey Captain! LEARN TO FREAKING WALK."

The good news? Well, I can't think of any at the moment but I do hope that I'll sleep tonight. I'm upping the Flexeril and hydrocodone and praying that this elephant will find another neck to perch on. Wish me luck.

Just Another Fish In The Sea

2009-05-30T14:41:00.001-07:00

We were curious to see if our fourth child would take to the water like the other three did.

Guess so.

Let the summer fun begin!

Beautiful

2009-05-28T09:12:00.000-07:00

Love music?

Want to smile?

Feel great?

Love life?

Go Here. And turn up the volume.

Thanks again, Rockstar. I'll stop stalking you now.

My List

2009-05-26T09:42:00.000-07:00

Do you ever swing by Taza's blog?

Yeah, me too.

I adore her. I'm not sure how I stumbled upon her but I love the simple things she writes about, the beauty she sees in the everday stuff, and the love she has for her husband. And she's a graduate of Julliard with a degree in dance so we are most definitely kindred spirits.

A few weeks ago, she wrote a list of 10 Things That Make Her Terribly Happy and she's been encouraging her readers to send their lists to her as well. She's been posting them continuously and I have LOVED reading them. It's so neat to see what makes other people tick and it's been a fantastic reminder of just how good life really is. You can find joy around every bend; you just have to be willing to look for it.

I've been mulling over my list repeatedly, tweaking it here and there until it's just right. It's been a great exercise in Happy. Thanks Taza. Another simple way you've inspired me to find the good stuff.

10 Things That Make Me Terribly Happy

::Hearing the garage door open, signaling that my husband is home::
::An entire day spent in the backyard::
::The sound of rain late at night::
::Spontaneous hugs and "I love yous" from my kids::
::Late night movies with homemade Carmel popcorn::
::Time alone to browse through my favorite stores::
::Chocolate::
::Girlfriends who get it::
::Heading out on a trip first thing in the morning when my kids
are still in jammies, sleeping in their seats::
::Traveling to someplace new and discovering that it's even better than I imagined::

Even as I write it out, I'm already thinking of things to change and items to add. What a great problem to have.

Thanks Taza!

A Memorial Weekend

2009-05-25T09:16:00.001-07:00

Our long weekend didn't exactly turn out as planned.

Matt and Jen came from Boise with their adorable kids, Sims and Lily.

Sims is three and reminds me of Spence with his consuming obsession with Thomas the Tank Engine.

Lily is 15 hours older than Austin but about half his size. She is a pint sized pixie.

First Jen got sick.

Then Matt got sick.

Then Jen went to Urgent Care.

Then Lily threw up.

Again.

And again.

And again.

Then Matt's throat was on fire.

Then they packed up first thing Sunday morning and went home.

Like I said, not exactly as we had planned.

My Life Is A Cliche'--How Changing Your Attitude Can Change Your Life And Other Annoying Truths

2009-05-20T09:27:00.000-07:00

I'm back, I feel better, all is well. I can conquer the world yet again thanks to all your kind words.

That said, here's a little snippet of what else helped to pull me through. You know the Grumpy Old Troll on Dora? Who lives under a bridge and sings songs and makes you solve his riddle before you can cross? Sienna has become particularly fascinated with him and several times throughout the day, she is singing away at whoever will listen and asking them to solve her riddle. It's a combination of highly adorable and highly annoying. Take a looksie:

And then there's Doctor Destructor who wreaks havoc wherever he goes and makes us all fall in love with him a little more each day.

See, the hard stuff isn't so hard when you've got so much goodness around you.

Little By Little

2009-05-18T21:21:00.000-07:00

(My dear friend Kelly sent this magnet to me)

Have you ever wanted to take a brief vacation from yourself? To finally do, say and be the things that you don't normally allow yourself to do, say and be? To stop being so dependable, so reliable and efficient and organized, to just throw your hands in the air and act impulsively?

Today was a day that wore me out. Needy children (whom I desperately need but just not quite so much) troubling phone calls, an anxious visitor. On and on it went until I realized I had given away every morsel of myself and had nothing left. I turned around and poof! I was gone. I swear I was here a minute ago.

That's the thing with being put together. Other people notice your put-togetherness and start pulling little parts of you away. Not intentional, of course, not because they are trying to break you down but because they need something in their life and recognize that you just might be the one to give it to them.

I pride myself on being put together. By 7 am most every morning, you can find me in my kitchen, showered and completely ready for the day, making breakfast, packing lunches, signing off on homework. Getting it done. That's what I do. I get it done. And I love it. I love that I keep a clean house and would feel comfortable if a friend dropped in and needed to use my upstairs bathroom. It's okay, I would tell myself, it was just cleaned and replenished with fresh linens. I can mow the lawn, make homemade jam, sing with my kids and pat myself on the back at the end of it all.

But sometimes, sometimes I just want to sit back and be still. I want someone else to come and do my life for a day or twelve while I take a moment to soak in my surroundings. I want someone else to take care of me and keep track of all the responsibilities I have. I want someone to play counselor for me and hear me out on my worries and troubles. I want someone else to be responsible for saying the right thing, for cleaning it up and making it right. For once, I want to be Humpty Dumpty and not all the King's men. Someone else can put it together again.

At some point along the way, I've taken on roles in life that I wasn't quite prepared for. I was ready for "WIFE," ecstatic for "MOM," and well versed in "DAUGHTER" and "SISTER." But I wasn't ready to have all the answers, to be able to explain the unexplainable, to make sense of that which will never make sense. I wasn't prepared to have people look to me to take away some of the ache in their heart or to fill up what's missing. I try repeatedly and I desperately want to get it right and be to everyone what everyone needs. But not at the risk of losing me. Not at the risk of pushing myself so far down the list that I know I'll never get to it. To me, to the things I love and want and desperately need.

Tomorrow will be better. Tomorrow I will wake rested and begin my day as I usually do and I will be long passed the feelings that sit with me now. Feelings that exhaust me and leave me wondering how to do more, to be more, to say more. To make the world right for everyone in my world. Tomorrow my optimism will be renewed and I will be happy to take my place in the middle of it all and do what needs to be done. But tonight? Tonight at the end of this very long day? I will allow it all to sink in and give myself permission to be a little sad, a little overwhelmed, a little tired.

But just for tonight.

Monday Morning.

2009-05-18T10:40:00.000-07:00

Lawn needs mowing.

Laundry needs folding.

Floors need vacuuming.

But I'm coloring with Squish.

I may get this mothering thing down after all.

Another Reason I Love Where I Live

2009-05-16T10:24:00.001-07:00

I can sit on the deck of my house, listening for my sleeping babe,
and watch my kids at the park. Perfection!

Together

2009-05-14T09:29:00.000-07:00

Dear Hannah,

I've seen some pretty great things coming from you lately and I wanted to say a quick thanks. A lot of the troubles we were having months ago are suddenly no longer issues and I know it's because you've been working hard. Hard to be happy, hard to not get bogged down in the details, hard to be the sweet girl we all love.

I ran into your teacher the other day at school and she stopped me for a second. "I'm so proud of Hannah," she gushed. "She's making such great choices and shows up every morning with a smile on her face." I am so proud too.

I see so much of myself in you that it often scares me. I see you fight your way for everything, to be heard, to be seen, to be noticed and I hope you know that I always see. I always hear. I always notice.

One of the things Dad and I talk to you endlessly about is the choices you make. Choosing to be happy, rather than sad. Choosing to eat what's been prepared for you rather than throwing a fit. Choosing the clothes in your closet instead of worrying about what you don't have. I have seen so much progress in the choices you're making my dear and it literally makes my heart sing.

I worry for you, like all moms worry for their kids, but the prayer I find myself uttering most often is that you'll get out of your own way. That you'll see how much fun you are, that you'll recognize your abilities and talents and thrive with what you've been given. That you'll spend less time thinking about what your friends have and see all that you have right in front of you.

One of my favorite things about you right now is how you help with your little brother. You are so sweet with him, so calming and helpful and he lights up when you're around. You always know how to calm him when he's upset, and hearing you sing to him is the sweetest sound I know. You are going to be a remarkable mother someday, with all your compassion and grace and I can't wait to see the miracles you'll create.

Just remember this, sweet girl: you are loved by a Mama who understands who you are and what you need. We may not always agree but at the very core of who I am is a woman who would give anything for your happiness. I know it's hard, this whole being a kid thing, but as long as we stick together, we can do anything.

Love,
Mama

Snack Time

2009-05-13T10:33:00.000-07:00

Sienna: "Mom, can I have a snack?"

Me: "Sure babe, what do you want?"

Sienna: "What do we have?"

Me: "Yougurt?"

Sienna: "No."

Me: "String cheese?"

Sienna: "No."

Me: "Applesauce?"

Sienna: "No."

Me: "Croutons?"

Sienna: "YES!"

So she sits, on the floor in front of the TV, munching a baggie of croutons. Man I love that girl.

The 48 Hours In Which I Bought My Kids Coffee And Stole From WalMart

2009-05-11T09:29:00.001-07:00

Yep, I sure did.

A few weeks back, back when exhaustion was at an all time high due to my husband's crazy tennis schedule and my youngest son upchucking every 12 minutes or so, the chaotic fervor of my life hit an all time high and I completely lost my mind.

Spence's birthday was right around the corner, and literally, even though it pains me to type this next sentence, we did not have time for a party. Brad was gone on a tennis tournament for three days and the following weekend was supposed to be spent in Seattle at another visit to Children's so it had to be done. But the thought of several nine and almost nine year olds running wild while I had sick baby and no second set of hands to help me was too much. I offered Spence the option of having two friends for a sleepover and he readily agreed, only asking that I "let them play Wii as long as they wanted without the timer."

Done.

So Thursday night, with Brad off in another state playing tennis, I found myself ready for a warm bath and some quiet time. I was subbing the following day and had just made it home from a particularly frustrating PTO meeting. Spence made his way into my room and said "what kind of cake are you making me?"

Uh....

I ALWAYS make my kid's cakes. It's something I love doing and even though I'm not great at it, I love the look on their faces when they see what I've come up with. But since to my mind we weren't having a "party" the idea of a cake never even occurred to me.

Another mothering high for me.

I asked him what he wanted and he said, naturally, a Wii cake.

So once all my kids where tucked into bed, I sat and tried to figure out how to do this. A quick call to this gal, some speedy internet searching and I was raring to go. Unfortunately it was about 10 pm and I was just putting four mini cakes in the oven but whatever.

The following day was a blur and when I made it back home after a day of subbing, I put the cakes together and Spence was thrilled. I made each boy his own Wii controller and even though they were a bit fat, it worked. Spence's face was worth it all.

The boys ate homemade pizza, snarfed their Wii controllers and played until all hours of the night. I last checked on them at 11:30 when I fell into bed and they were still glued to the screen. It's a wonder any of them can still see clearly.

When I woke up the next morning, I felt like a fog of exhaustion had took up residence in my brain, intent to stay for weeks to come. Austin had another difficult night and I was pooped. But I had baseball games to get to and playdates to figure out, not to mention 2 additional boys in my house so I showered and was off.

Our first stop naturally was Viera's Bakery because really? How else do you start a Saturday? I had Spence and his friend Quentin with me and little Austin in tow and I gave them the tray and tongs to go pick out their goods. When they called over to me from the cooler and asked for chocolate milk, I wearily yelled "Sure thing!" across the store in hopes of keeping my status as world's coolest mom. We made our purchases and hoped back in the car to get ready for baseball.

We were just about home when Spence called out from the backseat "Uh Mom? You just bought us coffee!" Which they had since inhaled. Or rather, Quentin inhaled and Spence, conflicted over his constant mantra of "Choose The Right" took a sip of and then thought he should wait for me. And this is where I get annoyed. Because really? It totally looked like chocolate milk, complete with goofy cow on the front and ad for Spongebob Sqaurepants on the wrapper. Luckily, I was not really concerned with whether or not they had just had coffee but more concerned with 24 oz of caffeine racing through my 60 lb 9 year old. Great role model, right? Quentin went on and on about how good the coffee tasted and I reflected to my pre-Mormon life in which I LOVED all things coffee. So much so that one Mother's Day, when Spence was asked by his primary teacher what the one thing is that I wished for this world, his response was "that coffee would be good for her."

It. was. awesome.

I now understand the idea behind this though, as I am one of those people who would literally tap my jugular and main-line it into my body at all times. And how healthy would that be?

Fast forward to Monday, when I had my two little ones and these two little ones in tow. I had to run to WalMart since Austin was still purging everything in site and I had no food to feed little Chloe and if you know anything about Chloe, it better be that the girl needs food. Everyone was doing great until Austin unloaded in the middle on the aisle, right in between the Campbell's soup display and the canned veggies. I reached for my diaper bag only to discover I was out of wipes. I ran to the end of the aisle where there was a paper towel dispenser. I got as many as I could, covered the contents of his stomach the best I could and sheepishly moved on. It was not a proud whiskey tango moment.

When I finally made it to the checkout, I ran into her and we started talking. I think she could easily see how hammered I was and tried to console me as I corralled my troops and paid for my goods. Or, almost paid for my goods. The industrial sized bottle of Pedialyte that I had wedged up by Austin was completely forgotten until I got to the car, where everyone was already buckled in. And this is what I did next.

I left.

Because really, I know I'm a good person and not one who usually steals. And I know that I would make it right the next time I returned to WalMart, which would probably be in another 3 hours. And I know I should have felt horrible for leaving but I honestly didn't. I felt as though the universe owed me a gigantic bottle of Pedialyte as reward for making it through Day 12 of Constant Puking And Single Parenting.

Perhaps the best part of the story is that when I did return to WalMart and try to pay for the stolen merch, the salesgirl did not understand what I was doing.

"So, like, you want to give me, like, money for something that's like, not in your cart?"

"Yep, sure do." I explained it several times over and finally, when managers had been called and confusion still reined supreme, I actually uttered the words "if it's easier for you, I can just keep stealing it."

We worked it out. I paid for my Pedialyte and made my weary way home. And to think I was still spoiled silly yesterday for Mother's Day!

The Happiest Of Days

2009-05-10T08:00:00.001-07:00

To the four greatest munchkins on the planet, thanks for letting me be your mom. You've given me the best job in the world.

And to the man who made me a mother and has supported me every step of the way, I adore you. Motherhood would be lost on me if you weren't my partner in crime.

And to my own mother, who would literally give anything in this world for my safety and happiness, thanks for showing me the way.

Happy Mother's Day!

To Do:

2009-05-05T13:50:00.000-07:00

Today is crazy busy:

*Set up the Teacher Appreciation breakfast (huge thanks to Tiffani and Cindy!)

*Run to Costco for Wednesday's food

*Sub at PHS

*Attend my first pack meeting as assistant leader

*Race home, grab some dinner and head to Spencer's game

*Make and frost 75 cupcakes

*Bunko (if I'm lucky)

*Spend a few minutes talking to my husband before I...

*Fall asleep

The only reason I'm able to accomplish this list is because of my mother. She is home, baking cupcakes, watching kids and filling in all the holes that I am leaving as I dash about town. Thanks Mom! I would not survive this week without you!