Think Geek

And another year makes . . . .

2009-06-25T00:07:00.003-05:00

22. I could go on and on about how I'm "old" and that this birthday doesn't really mean anything. Of course, 21 for a Mormon girl doesn't really mean much anyway - I don't drink. But the fact that time seems to be racing by me, now that's something to think about. I've accomplished a lot in my 22 years. I have a high school diploma, a BA in English from a well-respected private university, I've been accepted for graduate school in the UK, I've finished my first novel (though still working on editing it), presented at a literature conference, I bought my first car, built a pretty good resume, and made a great number of friends. The list could go on and on. When you put it all together like that, the years seem longer. Or like they should be longer. It's just crazy how fast life passes you by.

I can seriously remember feeling like a little kid. Teenager seems to resonate within me a little more, and that may be why I like YA fiction. But I look at pictures or just sit and think and I can remember those days. A lot of my little kid memories have to do with my grandpa, my mom's dad. I can still remember climbing up to sit on his shoulders for one. And when I say climbing, I mean literally crawling up the poor man's body. I remember sitting on his lap and making up stories to this ridiculous picture book that was pink-toned and had pictures of monkeys. When I think about those times, I sort of feel like I am still there.

Sure, I would love to not have responsibilities like a little kid. With bills, grad school costs, and life-changing decisions weighing on me, it would be nice to have the hardest decision of my day to be which book to get from the library. Or whether or not climbing that tree is a good idea (it usually wasn't, FYI). I think we all escape into those moments and memories of innocence.

Of course, childhood wasn't easy like we all want to remember. I can remember several nights falling asleep crying because I had gotten in trouble for something (probably talking back - shockingly, it happened a lot). I know I had a hard time with sleep even as a kid because I used to listen to my grandmother's music box under my pillow to help me fall to sleep (under my pillow so it wouldn't bug Kellan cause we shared a room). I remember all too clearly getting picked on because I wasn't a girly girl and I couldn't put my own hair into a ponytail until about sixth grade. Or seventh. Something ridiculously late like that.

I guess I'm thinking about this because I'm getting older, but also because I have so many little children entering my life. My nephew, Owen Bernd VanSkiver (unless otherwise decided upon), is due within just a few weeks. My "niece" Sophia just turned 2 (and she is the cutest little girl ever!), and a few of my friends are expecting or just had their own little ones. Such as cute lil' George Busby. With all these kids entering the world, it makes me think on being a kid myself and my own kids someday. You want little children to lead this innocent life. You want them to not have to worry with you as job loss becomes a reality or a marriage hits a rough patch as they all do at some point. But the thing is, should you really desire to protect them from everything?

A pessimistic viewpoint would be, life sucks - they'll figure it out. But really, is innocence possible or even desirable? Ok, maybe innocence isn't the right word. Perhaps naivete. Struggles and trials are an everyday part of life. While we'd like to shield ourselves from that reality, it's impossible. I'm not saying to throw your children to the wolves, but there's a certain point when protection becomes impossible and undesirable.

How does this even remotely tie in with what I started talking about? I don't know. Sometimes my fingers just go without my mind being able to catch up. But really, birthdays tend to make everyone nostalgic. My childhood wasn't hard by any means, though I certainly had trials. I will say that just my nature probably made me more naive to some of the problems we faced as a family and what those problems entailed. But I know that I'm a stronger person because I wasn't shielded from things. Maybe my mom intended to hide us away, but she didn't do a very good job if she did. :) I witnessed a lot of things while growing up that I could probably do without if I had a choice. Getting shot in the leg with a BB gun, taking a hockey puck to the face, and getting hit over the head with a hammer are a few of the things I think I could live without having in my past. But in a way, all of those things made me stronger. It might be why I can post pictures of the gnarly bruises I get and laugh at them. Even still, it makes you emotionally stronger. We all hate the problems that come up in our lives, but wouldn't life be so much more boring if everything were easy?

You're going to want to disagree with that. But just think back to some of the memories that resonate the most within you, the ones that you feel define you as who you are. I'll bet you money you wouldn't have those attributes without a struggle to get there first. Unless there's a secret to life my parents neglected to teach me . . . . .

Hiatus

2009-06-07T22:28:00.003-05:00

Yea, I know it's been almost two months. Two months tomorrow actually. A lot has kept me away from blogging. I had papers and finals, then moving, then the painful search for a summer job, ended up with two jobs, and spending the little free time I get with a couple of friends. So yea. Not a lot of time on my computer. Which is probably good for me considering how addicted I can get to this thing.

I got my official notice that I was accepted with an unconditional offer to the U of Stirling, meaning as soon as my paperwork gets unlost in the mail, I can apply for a visa, loans, and the like. Kind of crazy that it's coming on so fast. I mean, it's already June! Holy cow. I'll be 22 in less than 20 days, my first nephew is due next month, and I'm moving overseas in three months barring any unforeseen circumstances. My "niece" also turns 2 next week! Crazy! She's getting older which means I'm getting older.

In the past month and a half I've been home, our storage room flooded (that was fun), we got stuck in our house because the front yard/street flooded and became beach front property, I've painted my bedroom and got a new bed. If any of you have been to my house, my dad's finally planning on finishing our bathrooms this summer, along with new flooring for upstairs and my room especially because it was Silver's favorite place to hack up a hairball. I think she felt comfortable in here, but that doesn't mean I like the fact that my kitty puked in here all the time. I'm actually really excited to help with some of the projects around the house. I want to learn how to do some of that stuff. I love being self-reliant and knowing how to do things. Which reminds me, I need to change my oil soon.

I know, most of this is rambling. But rambling is what I do best, right? Or something like that. Oh man, I think this means I'm getting tired and I need to sleep. Some of you might remember me as an insomniac. Too bad now I'm just waking up earlier in the morning and going to bed earlier at night. It's weird. I don't like it. :P

End of an Era

2009-04-08T00:51:00.004-05:00

Yes, my attendance at BYU has been an era. Four years is a long time to be stuck in Provo. I have to admit, the first couple of years here I loved it, and then I hated it. And the more people I talk to, the more agree with that statement. There's not too much to do, snow in April is EVIL, hiking a mountain to get to class isn't fun, and drivers here are just plain scary. So are some of the pedestrians for that matter. But I have been blessed to find some great friends in Provo, and on nice days like today, I realize I'm going to miss it. Sort of.

Yesterday I had the opportunity to hear Murray Pittock speak twice. Once at a small gathering where we discussed his paper, and another time that afternoon where he lectured on Robert Burns. This is one of the foremost Scottish Lit scholars, so meeting him is kind of like meeting a rock star. Ok, not quite. He's a pretty awesome guy and I got a chance to talk to him about my research interests and am looking forward to maybe working with him in the future. Meeting with him and talking to him about my interests makes me really excited to graduate and get over there. Of course, he kept saying he loved how the mountains were "right there" and that he could actually look at things since his head wasn't in the gutter to avoid the rain. The funny thing is, I'm looking forward to the rain. Yes, I'm weird.

Today was pretty cool, too. I got to meet one of my dad's friends from his mission. He was at BYU to speak about the history of the church in Spain, and when I told him who I was afterwards, he just kept going on and on about how awesome my father was. My dad's not much of a bragger, so I don't get to hear all of the mission stories (plus, guys tend to not talk about their missions as much once they've been home for a year). I know some about his mission, of course, but it's really cool to hear from someone who was a new member when my dad went to Spain and how much love he has for my dad. All kids fight with their parents, especially during their teen years, so I think it's great to get stories and meet people that know them and love them. It really helps you to love them even more.

I think since my semester here is ending, and my graduation is coming soon, that I'm looking around a lot more. I mean, the JFSB is one of the coolest buildings ever. I'm going to miss my home away from home. I've basically lived there these last four years. And, this is going to sound nerdy, but I'm really going to miss our library. I know where everything is, for one. I have specific study spots for when I know I really need to get down to work, where there's always an open computer when I'm too lazy to bring my own, and I even know the best hiding places for sardines. I know, I'm waxing sentimental. But when you spend four years some place, even if you have a love/hate relationship with it, well, it tends to have an impression.

I have only a little left to do before I leave. I have 3 classes left. 3! One of which is tomorrow, and the other two are the last creative writing classes, which is basically a party all the time. We have a lot of fun in that class. I've packed about 1/4 of my things (stuff I won't need, that'll end up in my parents' basement for awhile), and I've got my fair share of homework. But really, after this week, it's looking pretty good.

Novel revision that I turned in today.
One 10 page paper, 2 four page papers due on Thursday.
Study for an oral exam for next Tuesday.
One 10-20 page paper due Thursday the 16th.
Finish my online D&C course. This entails a few quizzes and the final that'll take about an hour to get done.
Pack everything I own (which always seems to multiply when you have to put it in boxes).
Say goodbye to people I'm going to miss.
Get my final transcripts set to mail to Stirling.

Yea, I love how I've really finished the first 10 page paper, I just have to revise one of the four page papers, and half the paper due next week is done. It's kind of weird having all of this wind down. You never really think you're going to finish college when you start. At 18, four years seemed like forever, and now it feels like it flew by.

And yes, I'm graduating BYU without my M.R.S. Many people back home will be ashamed. But I don't mind. I'm moving to SCOTLAND!

UVU Children's Lit Forum Day 2

2009-03-13T21:55:00.002-05:00

I actually got up early this morning, which was good considering two people were counting on me on getting them to the conference on time. As for the conference, this morning focused more on picture books than I would have liked (and the one speaker who had presentations on YA lit this morning had to cancel for some reason). And even though the afternoon held better presentations for me, I still enjoyed my morning.

I especially loved hearing Shannon Hale speak again. This time on writing and mothering, but really more of how to write around your schedule of a full-time job, or in my case, being a student. I found the whole thing really fascinating. Plus, Carol introduced me to the editor at the conference and mentioned the good quality of my manuscript. Yay!

I have to say that Shannon provided quite a few good snippets over the last couple of days. So below are some of my favorite quotes from her from the conference:

"[Being a writer] is a form of mental illness."
"Don't google your name or book's name - it leads to unhappiness and misery."
"Writer's block is the fear of not writing eloquently."
"As writers we're crows - ooooo, something's sparkly!"
"I'm such a story-whore."
"There should be a session for a cage match"

And to quote Carol and her metaphor about what she does, "Goddess."

UVU Children's Lit Forum

2009-03-12T21:04:00.004-05:00

I spent today at the UVU Forum for Children's Lit. Man, today was one of the best days. I apparently didn't take as good of notes as Ben (I'm not organized enough to list it out that way, anyway).

The day started off with me waking up at 8:20 and I was supposed to be at UVU by 9am. Crap. I actually made it in time for the keynote which was Shannon Hale. Let me just say that I had never read anything by her before, so I picked up a copy of "Princess Academy" and polished that off yesterday. Pretty good book. It's a Newberry Honor winner, and it really got me into the story. But Shannon herself is one of the most fun speakers. She had me on the floor laughing through her keynote and her later presentation on "What I Wish I'd Known."

Following the keynote we had a panel with several different individuals (including my idol and teacher, Carol Lynch Williams) who gave several different books that they loved. It wasn't my favorite part of the conference, but I got some great ideas of the books I can read next. Which I guess was kind of the point. This conference was also for librarians and grade school teachers, so I'm sure they got more out of it than me.

I also really liked Abby Ranger's presentation on "Revising Your Novel." She's an editor at Hiperion and had a lot of great ideas about going back through your book. I'm not entirely sure I could wait the two months that she recommended before revising your novel, but she had a lot of great points about looking at your book through fresh eyes.

Lunch was good, if not a little boring. I'm not all that interested in the process of how Newberry Medals are picked. If I ever get one, great, if not, oh well.

The last presentation I attended was by Emily Wing Smith about voice. I think I got a lot from hers, too. If there's anything I have a problem with, it's voice. I've actually heard her speak before, but for some reason I got a great idea to push my second novel forward, and now I'm a few pages in. This book will be mostly about the character, a pretty good shift from my first novel which has a pretty action-packed plot. We'll see how well it goes.

I'm attending the second day of the conference tomorrow, so I'll post more then!

10 Reasons Why I'll be Just Fine in Scotland

2009-03-10T22:33:00.002-05:00

My coworkers made fun of me today for calling someone a "nutter." I was completely unaware that this was not a normal term here.
I made fish and chips for supper. With malt vinegar.
Most of the movies in my iTunes are made in Britain, set in Britain, and half of the TV shows I have are set in Scotland.
I spend my afternoons reading Scottish literature and criticisms on it. And I enjoy every minute of it.
I don't have to look up the call number for a book in the Scottish lit section of the library.
I find Irn Bru to be the best soda ever. If only it didn't cost so much here.
The novel I'm writing is set in Scotland.
When I see the mountains here I miss the heather-covered mountains of Scotland.
I love rain. Way too much.
Scotland has Mueller's corner yogurt. I will eat it every day, and laugh at Drew because she doesn't get to.

Working Towards my Future

2009-03-08T20:38:00.004-05:00

In roughly two weeks I'll deliver a paper at my first-ever literary conference. I'll be one of the speakers at the BYU English Literary Conference and I'm getting a little bit nervous. Granted, it's a conference for undergraduates, but public speaking still scares me. I'm working on shortening my paper and I need to print it out and practice reading it through a few times. And I need to read through and prepare for the question and answer section. Though I'm sure I'll do fine, it's still a little bit nerve-wracking not to know what to expect. And even though I'm nervous, I couldn't be more excited.

This Thursday and Friday I'll spend the day at UVU attending a conference for Children's Literature! I'm probably even more excited for this because I'm going to get to listen to some great speakers and just enjoy myself for a couple of days. I plan on attending BYU's Children's Lit conference this June, too. It's a great way to work to get my foot in the door. I'm really looking forward to actively working towards my goals. I've finished my first novel, I'm in the revision process, I've finished one major paper and am working on two or three more. It's really exciting.

A Milestone

2009-03-02T23:05:00.003-06:00

I should have blogged this last week, but better late than never. I finished the first draft of my novel. Right now it's not a comprehensive read since I've changed some plot points from beginning to end, but I have reached the end. Now it's time for revision, though I am enjoying taking a little break from it. I can't wait until I get the second draft done and then print it out. Oh man, that will be rather exciting.

I have started many a novel and never completed one, so that alone is an accomplishment for me. But it's not just the fact that I've finished it, but how much I've connected to my characters. I actually have dreams of scenes I've written with some slight variations. Ok, normally they're nightmares because the book is a mystery/thriller. Which means I'm being chased by scary men with guns. Oh well. It's still rather fun. I've gotten some good feedback and am looking forward to really perfecting the piece. Now I just need to get to work on the two papers that are due at the end of the semester for my other classes. I still can't believe that I'll be graduating so soon.

And, because I couldn't resist, here's a survey that I just had to do.

—YOUR BOY SIDE—-

[x] You love hoodies.
[x] You love jeans.
[] Dogs are better than cats.
[x] It’s hilarious when people get hurt.
[] Shopping is torture
[] Sad movies suck.
[X] You own a car racing game.
[X] You played with Hot Wheels cars as a kid.
[] At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
[] You owned a DS, PS2, N64,or Sega.
[x] You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
[x] You have watched sports on TV
[x some] Gorey movies are cool.
[x...about my car] You go to your dad for advice.
[ ] You own like a trillion baseball caps.
[ ] You used to collect baseball/football cards.
[x] Baggy sweats are cool to wear.
[] It’s kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
[X] Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
[x] You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
[x] Sports are fun
[X... only when its important] You talk with food in your mouth.
[X] You sleep with your socks on at night.
[x] You have fished at least once.

—-YOUR GIRL SIDE—

[x] You love to shop.
[]You wear eyeliner
[x..not very often ] You wear the color pink.
[ X] You go to your mom to talk.
[ ] You consider cheer-leading a sport.
[ ] You hate wearing the color black.
[X] You like going to the mall.
[X] You like getting manicures and/or pedicures
[X] You like wearing jewelry.
[] You cried watching The Notebook.
[] Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
[] Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
[ ] You don’t like the movie Star Wars
[x] You are/were in gymnastics
[ ] It takes you around one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up
[] You smile a lot more than you should.
[x] You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
[x] You care about what you look like.
[] You like wearing dresses when you can.
[x] You like wearing high heel shoes.
[x] You used to play with dolls as little kid.
[ ] You like putting make-up on others.
[] You like being the star of everything.
[ ] Pink is one of your favorite colors.

Appearance •

[] I am shorter than 5′5″ (I am 5'5"!).
[X] I have many scars.
[x] I tan/burn easily.
[x] I wish my hair was a different color. (I miss my pink)
[x ] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[] I have a tattoo.
[ ] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[ ] I’ve had/have braces.
[x] I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger.
[] I have more than two piercings.
[ ] I have/had piercings in places besides my ears.

• Embarrassment •

[] I’ve slipped out a “lol” in a spoken conversation.
[x] Disney movies still make me cry.
[X] I’ve snorted while laughing.
[] I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried.
[] I’ve glued my hand to something.
[ ] I’ve laughed ’til some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
[ ] I’ve had my pants rip in public.

• Health •

[x] I’ve gotten stitches.
[] Broken a bone.
[]I’ve had my tonsils removed.
[x] I’ve sat in a doctor’s office with a friend.
[] I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed.
[] I’ve had serious surgery.
[x] I’ve had chicken pox.

• Traveling •

[X] I’ve driven/ridden over 200 miles in one day.
[x ] I’ve been on a plane.
[x] I’ve been to Canada.
[ ] I’ve been to Cuba.
[ ] I’ve been to Niagara Falls.
[ ] I’ve been to Ottawa.
[ ] I’ve gone to Sudbury.
[ ] I’ve been to the Caribbean.
[x ] I’ve been to Europe.
[] I’ve been to Florida.
[ ] I've been to Japan
[ ] I've been to China

• Experiences •

[x I’ve gotten lost in my city.
[X] I’ve seen a shooting star.
[X] I’ve wished on a shooting star.
[x] I’ve seen a meteor shower.
[x] I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas.
[x] I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[X] I’ve kicked a guy where it hurts.
[x] I’ve been to a casino. (Vegas is PRETTY)
[ ] I’ve been skydiving.
[] I’ve drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
[x ] I’ve crashed a car.
[x] I’ve been skiing.
[] I’ve been in a musical.
[x] I’ve caught a snowflake or snow on my tongue.
[] I’ve seen the Northern Lights.
[X] I’ve sat on a rooftop at night.
[x] I’ve played a prank on someone.
[x] I’ve ridden in a taxi.
[ ] I’ve seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[x ] I’ve eaten Sushi.

• Relationships •

[x] I’m single.
[ ] I’m in a relationship.
[ ] I’m engaged.
[ ] I’m married.
[X] I miss someone right now.
[ ] I’ve gotten divorced.
[] I’ve told someone I liked them when I didn’t.
[X] I’ve told someone I didn’t like them when I did.

• Honesty / Crime •

[X] I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t.
[X] I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t.
[X] I’ve snuck out. (Not out of my parents', but I've actually sneaked out of apartments so my roommates didn't know I had left)
[] I’ve lied to my parents about where I am.
[x ] I’ve cheated while playing a game.
[x] I’ve ran a red light.
[] I’ve witnessed a crime.
[x] I’ve been in a fist fight. (Every interaction w/brothers is a fist fight)
[ ] I’ve been arrested.

• Death and Suicide •
[ ]I’m afraid of dying.
[x ] I hate funerals.
[ ] I’ve seen someone/something dying.
[X] Someone close to me has attempted/committed suicide.
[ ] I’ve planned my own suicide before.
[ ] I’ve written a eulogy for myself.

• Materialism •
[ ] I own over 5 rap CD’s.
[x ] I own designer purses, costing over $100 a piece. (Just one, and I got it at TJ Maxx)
[] I own something from Pac Sun.
[] I collected comic books.
[x] I own something from The Gap.
[] I own something I got on E-Bay.
[] I own something from Abercrombie

• Random •
[x] I would go barefoot 24/7 if I could
[x] I can sing well.
[ ] Stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
[ ] I open up to others easily.
[] I watch the news.
[ ] I don’t kill bugs.
[X] I sing in the shower.
[] I am a morning person.
[x ] I paid for my cell phone ring tone.
[ ] I am a sports fanatic.
[x] I twirl my hair.
[x] I care about grammar.
[ ] I have “?”’s in my screen name.
[ ] I love spam.
[ ] I’ve copied more than 30 CD’s in a day.
[] I bake well.
[] My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, red, blue, black, purple, or orange.
[X] I would wear pajamas to school.
[ ] I like Martha Stewart.
[x] I know how to shoot a gun.
[] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I laugh at my own jokes.
[x] I eat fast food weekly.
[] I’ve not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.
[] I can’t sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[X] I am really ticklish.
[x] I like white chocolate.
[ ] I bite my nails.
[x] I’m good at remembering faces.
[x] I’m good at remembering names.
[x] I’m good at remembering dates.
[] I honestly have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
[x] All my answers were totally honest.

Presentation

2009-02-12T21:43:00.002-06:00

I'll be giving a presentation on my (shortened) paper "Romantic Tones in Scottish Fiction" for the BYU English Literary Conference on March 21st. It's really exciting because not only is it something great to put on my resume, I also get some practice for my future career in academia. Kind of nerve-wracking of course.

In other news, I'm progressing quite nicely on my novel and I'm working on three major projects in Scottish Literature. Two are for papers, another is for a group presentation for class. Though I'm getting graded on all of them, it's really helping me expand my research base. I never would have thought that I would be able to get this much work done, possibly towards my thesis, before I even start graduate school. I'm getting more and more excited to be in Stirling every day.

25 Things

2009-01-27T23:42:00.004-06:00

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right-hand corner of the page), then click Publish.)

I did not text friends to give me answers to this. *cough*Shauna*cough*
I'm going to apply to be a substitute teacher for the end of the school year after I get home. Yay kids?
I sing along to movie musicals. You can't stop me. :p
I (not so) secretly hate programming sometimes.
I'm thinking about not having a mobile in Britain, just a land line. Shocking, I know.
I'm working on a mystery/thriller novel for young adults.
I like fresh fruit more than chocolate.
I hate avocado in any form.
I can't fall asleep unless I'm watching TV or something on my computer/iPod. I'm that bad of an insomniac.
I like to label everything. My first apartment by myself will be completely labeled.
I only own an iPod because it was the best deal for the money. And part of me loathes the fact I own it.
I want a Ninja motorcycle.
I still watch Anastasia and The Little Mermaid on a regular basis.
I used to watch Little Mermaid about 3 times a day before I started kindergarten.
I like that I didn't have any sisters growing up.
I've read J.R.R. Tolkien's biography several times.
I have the poster for my grad program in Stirling up in my room.
Snow sucks.
I've gotten to read books before they're published (yay Carol!).
I think 30 Rock always trumps The Office.
I'm actually thinking about getting a dog instead of a cat next year.
I'm moving back to Wichita this summer, but I might have to make a couple of trips to Utah.
I want to maybe come back to BYU to teach and help with the (hopefully) future Scottish Studies Center.
I've been wearing Lucky perfume since high school.
My best friend ever comes home from her mission in about 4 months!!!

(I'll tag people on Facebook. It'll be easier. But Jodi doesn't have Facebook, so she's tagged here. :P )

Resolutions and Events

2009-01-01T17:04:00.003-06:00

Well, as promised, here's a breakdown of my coming year and that will be followed by some resolutions, whether or not I'll get very far on them. :P

January 31 - Hear from the Fulbright Committee on the first step of my scholarship application process.

April 22 - Finish BYU and move back to Wichita for the summer! Yes, I realize that this is rather weird to be excited about (I never thought I'd be moving back to Kansas), but I've been thinking about it a lot, and especially since I'm planning on moving overseas in August, it gives me a home base and time to spend with family and friends.

May - Heather gets home from her mission! Though sadly I will not be close by to see her . . . but I'm sure we will work something out so that we can spend some time together.

June 25 - I turn 22. I am very old. Haha.

July 19ish - My first niece or nephew is due! Yay!

August 30-31 - Move to Scotland. I want to get in right at the beginning of September and give myself time to settle in before . . .

September 14 - First day of classes at U of Stirling! Wow, so weird to think that it is quickly approaching.

And from there I have no idea. We'll have to see if I get to travel much before classes or come home for Christmas or whatever. As to resolutions:

Have half of my thesis written before the end of the year (at least the first draft).
Save money (every dollar spent is 50pence less that I can use in the UK).
Get a cat (when I move overseas). This isn't much of a resolution, since I'm going to, but oh well.
Brush up on my Spanish. I want to go to Spain while I'm in Europe.
Send one novel off for publication (or to at least be rejected by several publishers . . . hehe).
Continue to work on my weight-loss goals. I got too stressed last year (and the knee issues prevented me from spending enough time in the gym).

Well, that's it for now. I suppose we'll come back and see just how well I do one year from now!

The End of 2008

2008-12-31T19:54:00.002-06:00

Not too many things have happened in this last year, and yet some things have been rather exciting. I suppose it depends on the way you look at it. A lot of little things that have added a great amount of fun to my own life.

In the last year, I was accepted to graduate school in Scotland, found out that I'm going to be an aunt (in just the last week actually), my "niece" Sophia turned 1, my best friend Casie was baptised into the LDS church, and a few of my really great friends got back from their missions! I also got to re-meet my old friend Ben whom I haven't seen in about 15 years. I had surgery on my knee, finally. I got a car, and then another car (woops), and applied for graduation! I cannot believe that I am 21 years old and almost done with my bachelor's degree in English.

Tomorrow I'll post about what's to come in 2009! Which, if all goes according to plan, is a lot.

Announcement

2008-11-21T06:52:00.003-06:00

I received notice that I have been accepted into the University of Stirling's MLitt in Modern Scottish Writing!!! It's in Scotland, if you didn't figure that part out. Of course, I have to graduate (silly idea, I know) and barring any other unforeseen circumstances, I will be starting the program (or programme, if you will) next fall!

You may now commence being jealous.

Addendum:

Most 21 year-olds would celebrate this information with champagne or alcohol of some kind. I celebrated with Shauna and Cafe Rio and caffeine! Bwahahahahahaha!

Utah Pedestrians and Burn

2008-11-20T12:09:00.003-06:00

Oh my goodness. I thought Utah drivers were bad. I've had my share of run-ins and the Divine Comedy skit last week demonstrated everyone's frustration (live Mario Kart reenactment with "I hate Utah drivers" as the closing statement). But the pedestrians. Holy cow. It's like they want to get hit. I'm ok with stopping for them crossing 500 n or something, though I wish they wouldn't run out in front of my car. It also seems that no one taught the good students of BYU that if you're going to be coming home in the dark, wear bright colors! I've seen quite a few people darting across just fast enough that I or the car ahead of me wouldn't hit them, but you couldn't see them until the last minute because they were wearing all black or very dark colors.

I admit, my high school was bad. People would walk all over that parking lot and not pay attention. But I have to say, parking lots are different than streets. Take my case this morning. I was driving on campus (my last week of that privilege) when a girl walks across the street. Not just any crosswalk mind you, but one where I definitely had a green light and she was just meandering across texting and not paying attention. Not only was she j-walking, but if I hadn't noticed, I could have hit her. When you're clearly walking against the Do-Not-Cross sign, at least pay attention to cars coming your way. She was completely oblivious.

Enough on that. I get to do a list thingy Shauna tagged me in. Instructions below.

1. Put your iTunes/MP3 library on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 10 friends who might enjoy doing the same, as well as the person you got the note from.

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Pork and Beans [[Weezer]]

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Strange Magic [[Darren Hayes (from Ella Enchanted)]]
Yea, strangely enough, it makes sense.

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Hero/Heroine [[Boys Like Girls]]

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Have I Paid My Debt to Mpls? [[the Stereo]]

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE
Party Up[[Hilary Duff]]
(First off, I still have NSYNC on here, secondly, Shauna, we're twins!)

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Lollipop[[MIKA]]

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Must Get Out[[Maroon 5]]
(SAD!)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Raid on the Castle [[Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian]]
(Well, I am kind of strange . . . )

WHAT IS 2+2?
Gone[[NSYNC]]
(See, told you)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
It's Easy [[Weezer]]

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Treebeard [[LOTR: Two Towers]]

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Bust [[OutKast]]

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Lost [[Katy Perry]]

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Stickwitu [[Fall Out Boy w/Missy Elliot]]

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Riot [[Three Days Grace]]
(Probably very true)

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Someone that You're With [[Nickelback]]

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
He Can Only Hold Her [[Amy Winehouse]]

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
War [[OutKast]]
(Maybe war against my brothers . . . . )

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Love Hater [[OutKast]]
(And that's why I love Jane Austen . . . haha)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Home [[Three Days Grace]]

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Happy Endings [[The All-American Rejects]]

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Tell Your Football Dad No [[The Stereo]]
(HA!)

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Sugar, We're Going Down [[Fall Out Boy]]

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Time to Dance [[Panic! At the Disco]]

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Across the Sea [[Weezer]]

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Wick [[Secret Garden]]

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
When I First Saw You [[Dreamgirls]]

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
If You Believe [[Andrea Remanda]]

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Lily's Eyes [[Secret Garden]]

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Ghetto Musick [[OutKast]]

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Burn [[Three Days Grace]]

Giving Up Addictions

2008-11-14T23:44:00.002-06:00

Ok, so I've realized something. Especially in the last couple of weeks. I am addicted to soda pop and fast food. I need to stop drinking so much soda (diet or no) and going through the drive thru. I can't imagine how much money I spend on just buying soda alone, but thinking of all of the money that I spend on Wendy's and Carl's Jr and Taco Bell, I just plain need to stop. Yes, it's easier than making food every night or whatever, but it'll be better in the long run if I can go without both of these addictions. I'm not saying that I'm going to be able to give up soda completely (my family will probably see me consume plenty over Thanksgiving), but I am going to stop spending money on such ridiculous things. Ah, the pains of being poor.

Happy Halloween!!!

2008-10-31T17:17:00.005-05:00

Wow, I haven't blogged in awhile. So, updates. I went to both the Weezer and Jason Mraz concerts in the last couple of weeks. They were amazing! I have loved Weezer since I was 13, so it was definitely a show that I was excited to see. And Jason Mraz is just hot. End of story.

I also sent in my application to Stirling! My last reference just got sent off this morning, so hopefully I should hear something back from them within the next couple of weeks. I am so excited that it's finally in and my grad school life is moving forward! I can't believe that this time next year I could be living in Stirling, Scotland!! Woo!

Shauna and I applied for graduation yesterday. This means I will actually graduate in April. I know, you're all jealous. I just registered for my last semester of my undergrad, too, so I am almost done! I'm not planning on walking for graduation (hello, I get to get out of Provo earlier and I don't have to sit through a 3 hour ceremony). I'm going home for the summer, by the way. Well, pretty much unless I'm not moving to Scotland. Then I'll have to figure out what I want to do.

Anyway, below are pictures from the recent events! Woohoo, I'm growing up . . . I think that's a good thing . . . .
Weezer! This was probably the greatest concert ever.

Shauna and I are graduating!

Jason Mraz was hot!!!

Jane Austen Weekend

2008-10-12T23:58:00.002-05:00

It got cold this weekend. Really cold. As in, below freezing. Yuck. Instead of venturing outside much, I chose to stay in and watch a lot of Austen. "Northanger Abbey" again, "Jane Austen Book Club" (it sort of counts since it's about Austen's novels), part of the 5 hour "Pride and Prejudice" and now tonight, "Persuasion." I think that I need to finish out my marathon with "Mansfield Park" and "Sense and Sensibility," but as I need to go to the gym tomorrow morning before work, I should probably try to sleep tonight.

I know that all of the novels are set in England, but something about the UK in general makes me so miss Scotland. I wish I could go next semester, for a tour of Uni of Stirling as an excuse or something. Maybe look at some apartments. I don't know. I just really, really want to go back. It's been far too long since I've been.

There is something about snuggling up under warm covers and watching Jane Austen to make the on-coming winter far more bearable. At least, that's what I think. You should all try it, too.

Sleepless

2008-10-11T04:49:00.002-05:00

This is the second sleepless night in a week. Well, almost 3rd. But Tuesday was due to getting in late from a Weezer concert, and I was still keyed up from that. Wednesday I slept an hour. And I'm afraid that's about all I'm going to get today. I don't understand why it is, but my insomnia seems to be coming back. So lame. I have pills to help me sleep, but I don't have to take them all of the time. Looks like I need to start up again. The sad thing is, I'm exhausted. I can feel I'm tired. But sleep doesn't come. How unfair. I wish I hadn't inherited my weird sleep schedule from my father . . . grrr. Haha.

Girliness

2008-10-08T21:40:00.001-05:00

So like Alicia, I am a sucker for free stuff and purses. So go check this out! If you're a girl. Otherwise, I'm going to be a little worried about you . . . .

Enter here!

I Am Catherine Morland

2008-09-30T00:45:00.004-05:00

Most of you who know me know that I have a weak spot for Jane Austen. In fact, I would say that that is probably the most girly thing about me. I love her novels, that each of them get a happy ending that Austen herself never got. I love them from a more critical viewpoint, having done a bit of research (ok, maybe a lot) into Austen's life and have formed my own ideas as to why she wrote her works and how each of the heroines embody a bit of her or someone she wishes she could have been.

Slightly lesser known, I probably love Northanger Abbey most of all. It's not generally thought as one of her best works, or even one that's studied as much. Most women are either Sense and Sensibility or the predictable Pride and Prejudice lovers. Don't get me wrong, I love both of those novels as well. I wish I were more of an Elizabeth Bennet (and definitely can say I possess some of her qualities), but as I have read, reread, and watched the newest adaptation of Northanger Abbey (twice this last weekend actually), I know which character I am most like. And maybe that's why I like it most of all.

Catherine, as Austen describes her, is a silly seventeen-year-old girl who reads too many novels and has a hard time separating her own life from the fiction she constantly hides in. Sound like anyone you know? Granted, I am much more mature than Catherine (yea, right), but I have to admit that growing up, and even in my "adult" years, I too have often had a pretty active imagniation. I may not think that my suitor's father murdered the mother at their "haunted" estate, but overactive nonetheless.

Catherine also would rather be playing games and reading books than doing anything else - something that I have to admit is my truest desire. If I could just read books, I would be happy. Except, I get to analyze them, too. Ha. But besides her love of novels, she is naive, impressionable, and perhaps too forgiving. Without giving too much away, she believes her friend Isabella to be always sincere, General Tilney to like her simply because he sees his son's affection for her, and all too quick to forgive John when he tricks her into standing up the Tilneys for walk around Bath. I have to say, that although I claim to be wise, I too may be a little bit more gullible and quick to forgive everyone around me. It definitely makes me feel less mature than my age to behave in such a way.

If you've seen the new adaptation, you'll know the ending scene (if not, I've posted the clip below). I particularly like the awkwardness of Catherine and Tilney's first kiss. Unlike in every other Austen adaptation, they make it appear real that these two people have never kissed another human being. Which, if they were the good people purported to be, would be true at that day and age (and if you're a prude like me . . . haha). Their affection seems real, and his devotion to her more important than anything else. Seriously, I would love my own Mr. Tilney. Give me a man who gives up a fortune to be with me, that's better than the Darcys and Bingleys of the world (I know, I blaspheme against women everywhere). Plus, I just love the ending, so I just had to share it.

Another thing I love about this novel is the fact that Austen spends most of the time berating the Gothic style. Silly novels that were all about fantastical plots, she constantly mocked Anne Radcliffe and other's novels, but defended the genre in all. Funny enough, because of Austen, Gothic novels have been looked down upon since. Just an interesting fact. As a writer, I have to agree with Austen. I love to write stories that are interesting, but if I ever write anything silly or over-the-top, I hope someone slaps me. If my characters are not at least believable, and my story doesn't appear to have more depth, than I would probably be doing it for the paycheck. Seriously. This doesn't mean I find Fantasy novels to be silly or in the same category - not if they are done well, anyway. Those of you who know me know full well that I love Tolkien and Rowling.

Anyway, I may post more on my heroine Catherine later, but for now, enjoy the clip. It's so sweet!

Too Late

2008-09-16T05:10:00.001-05:00

You know you've stayed up too late when . . . .

Sprinklers starting up outside sound like parseltongue. And you laugh out loud at the ridiculousness.
You begin to think in Scots (after writing the paper about Scottish fiction for the last 7 hours).
You're oddly giddy and unable to sleep.
You start to think you want breakfast because it'd only be a couple hours early.
You're not entirely sure anything you're thinking is actually coherent.

Wanted

2008-09-15T00:49:00.003-05:00

That's right. My fish is a murderer. It has to be him. You see, Merry is a platy. They are supposed to get along just fine with other platies. Original Pippin died after 2 days. I chalked it up to happenstance. After all, fish don't always do so well. I thought maybe he hadn't gotten enough food or something. But then I bought Pippin #2 on Friday. I was super careful to use the water from the bag, make sure he got some food, etc. Especially after I saw Merry hogging the food . . . . Saturday afternoon I got back from Liz's baby shower and my brother's and he was dead. Not even a full day. The only thing my roommate and I could think of was that Merry killed them. We're not really sure why, considering Merry and Pippin are supposed to be best friends. But we've decided to start calling him Jack the Ripper. Not that the Pippins were prostitutes, or even female that I know of, but he was the first famous murderer we could come up with. So now I have Merry, but no Pippin. It is sad, I know. It's also hard living with a murderer . . . .

Exhausted

2008-09-12T23:34:00.002-05:00

Oh. Man. I was kind of hoping for a semi-relaxed senior year. Yeah, right. Here's a typical week.

Monday: Work 8 hours. No classes.
Tuesday: Work from 8:30-11ish. Class from 12-4:15. Homework (with dinner crammed in) until 9, bed by 10 or 11.
Wednesday: Work from 8:30-3:30. Class from 4-6:30. Homework.
Thursday: same as Tuesday.
Friday: Work 8 hours. No classes.
Saturday: Should be writing papers and studying all day.
Sunday: RELAX!

Yea. So I'm kind of working a lot, so that adds to the stress. Plus, I'm working on my grad school applications (which includes my 8 months-of-work paper), and am applying for different international scholarships. I have no social life. Oh well. I'll have time for a social life in Scotland . . . right? haha

Provo Frustrations

2008-08-30T15:04:00.002-05:00

I hate drivers and pedestrians in this blasted city. No, I didn't get in an accident. But just for an example, I drove to Macey's to buy groceries. That's roughly a mile or so away from my apartment, but in that mile I saw more than one person walk out in front of my car on a busy street, several drivers turn out in front of me or another car, and my favorite, speeding down the back of the grocery store when the speed limit is probably about 30mph. Instead, 2 separate cars were going close to 45. Plus, every day I drive to work, the speed limit most of the way is 25. Being from Kansas, I naturally go 5 over (everyone does there, but that's all), but I get tailgated everyday because everyone here wants to go 10 or 15 over. BAH! I knew drivers here were bad, but you never really experience it until you drive here. When I was simply the passenger, it would be noticeable but not stressful. It's not that I freak out everytime I drive, but in general I have learned the best routes to take with the least amount of traffic. And you apparently always have to have your foot on your brake (or gas for that matter).

I wish it was only the drivers that frustrated me about Provo. I guess it's just the season, but Game days are really annoying if you want to go anywhere. Where I would have rather gone to the grocery store later this afternoon, I had to go early because Provo is basically going to be completely unnavigable by 2 or 3pm (and the football game doesn't start until 4). To top it off, it's also moving weekend. Everyone that's been gone all summer has decided to show back up in Provo with their junk and make tons of noise as they unpack. That's part of the reason I like to get into my place early. I'd rather get settled before the rush hits. Of course, it's also impossible to go to WalMart because it's crowded with roommates (mostly guys deciding if they really need that pan or if they're really going to use a broom), and freshmen flanked by their parents as they pile their carts full of things that they'll probably only use once while they're in college. It makes it hard for us single people who are only there to pick up another game for their Wii or to grab a couple of things to get through the week.

Needless to say, I've been kind of frustrated this last week. I'm actually looking forward to classes and some normalcy back in my life. Well, a more rigorous schedule I guess. I like having my day planned. I'm weird like that.

New Additions!

2008-08-27T19:43:00.005-05:00

So, as some of you know, I recently lost my poor betta Frodo to his long-anticipated death. Funny thing is, I had just resigned myself to keeping Frodo and even bought him a new aquarium with a filter, pebbles, and plants! One of them even glows in the dark! And then the next day he died. :( I decided that instead of taking back all of the fun stuff I just bought I would replace him. So today I made my way back to WalMart and purchased two platies! I didn't want another betta because I wanted two fish, and platies are nice and little so I can have two of them in the relatively smaller aquarium. So I introduce to you . . . .

Merry And Pippin!

Yes, I realize I've named my fish yet again after LOTR hobbits. That's sort of the point. But Merry and Pippin were always together and didn't have the ring to make them crazy, thus they get to live together! Haha.

I went and saw my surgeon today, and my knee is healing pretty well. I'm down to one crutch, and can walk without it as long as I'm not going to be doing a lot of walking. I'm also down to just a brace over my knee and I get my stitches out next Friday. Can't be soon enough because the stitches really itch! But, since we took off the gauze I can let my knee breathe every once in awhile! And, I took pictures. Hahahaha. It's really, um, pretty. The nice thing is that there are only three smaller incisions so that it'll heal faster. You can definitely see how bruised it is, and where they wrote "yes" on my knee so they made sure to cut open the right one. That would be awful if they cut open the wrong knee, but of course I wasn't too afraid of that happening. I just thought it was funny that he wrote yes on my knee and I believe he wrote a couple of other instructions to himself. At least, that's what it felt like when he came in to see me before the operation.