f*cked up $hit

F*ck Justin Timberlake!

2009-04-05T21:21:00.001-07:00

Eat the Cake Anna Mae- on Chris/Rihanna and Violence Against Black Women

2009-02-25T06:35:00.000-08:00

summer m. wrote this. i think it's brilliant and want to share it with the world. Makes me want to know is violence an inevitable element of black masculinity? Wanted to get your thoughts.

And she became the most famous, richest black woman in the world. Does that mean anything?

"See, we could fight like Ike and Tina..." -- Alicia Keys, "Unbreakable"

Why is this your opening line, Alicia? And why would this song EVER be your jam?

The other day, a relative of mine asked me (Sum) what my opinion was of the Chris Brown/Rihanna saga. It was a curiously framed question that I didn’t quite understand. It had never dawned on me to have an opinion on the matter. Maybe this was because of the black interest blogs I read. On them, there are people actually choosing a set – Team Rihanna or Team Chris – and repping it. Besides, I had only been paying mild attention to the whole ordeal, and what I did know consisted of rumors and hearsay. And I’m not in the business of forming an opinion based on some shit some niggas might (not) have said. I was a nerd in a black high school for two years. I know how to avoid fistfights.

Though she probably wasn’t, at the time it felt like my relative was asking me pick a camp and join it. Choose which rumors to believe or not, and cast my allegiance accordingly. Misunderstanding or no, the question made me uncomfortable – so much so that I actually squirmed a bit. But it did get me thinking about black people, and (normalized) violence, and how and why the black public sphere reacts to domestic violence the way it does.

If there are any white people reading this (so doubtful), you’ll have to trust me on the following statement. (In this instance, my cultural capital is worth more than yours. Take that, suckas!) Black people – and yes, I mean all black people, including Michelle Obama – know and quote scenes from two movies: What’s Love Got to Do With It? and The Color Purple. On varying levels, both movies are concerned with violence against black women perpetuated by their male partners. To add, Tyler Perry, who is a descendant and beneficiary of the kind of influence these films have on black movie audience and black culture at large, is the most popular black filmmaker of the day; he continues to disseminate and profit from the collateral intimate knowledge of these movies provide. For instance, one of his most recent films, The Family That Preys, features a deliberately unlikeable black female character who, through her insubordination (shout out, moyazb for this line and so much more), emasculates (and therefore disrespects) her black, blue-collar husband. So much so that the climax of the movie is his justifiable reclamation of manhood via smacking the shit out of her. I say justified because members of the primarily black audience I was in the company of (don’t ask why I was in a theater to see a Tyler Perry movie) cheered when it happened. The homie, Maegs had a similar experience. I put up several blue chips that these aren’t statistical aberrations. So, really, what the fuck is this about?

“You told Harpo to beat me,” and “That’s all you got, Ike?” elicit two responses from black folk: laughter and the outward expression of our inner thespians. What we seem to forget in our collective re-enactment of these scenes is the violence against black women at the heart of them. That casual omission seems to suggest, on some level just barely beneath the surface, that domestic violence is not only normal and acceptable, but a source of amusement. I ask, as someone who has participated fully in these exchanges plenty of times, What the fuck makes this shit funny? No, seriously, that is not a rhetorical question. Why the fuck are we laughing? Why are these the lines we memorize?

We have to stop this trend of normalizing violence in the home to the point that it is a stock device that any black comedian can employ to garner a laugh. I see no irony in this, Chris Rock. We have to stop rewarding (NAACP, listen up) and financially supporting a man whose career is based on dressing up in drag and caricaturizing black women, recycling coonery for the 21st century, and perpetuating misogyny and a belief in a patriarchal structure that advocates violence if it means the reclamation of a (tentative-ass black) manliness. We need to check these black interest blogs for the way they deliver this “news” to us. (And I’m not making that last point because nobody is fucking with our shit, despite Sum-n-Saf's blatant genius.)

Most importantly, we have to stop normalizing this violence and responding to it (only) with laughter. My ex used to talk about how ironic it was that the only blacks on television starred in sitcoms, because there really wasn’t much funny about black life in America. Well, there isn’t anything funny about black women getting their ears boxed. And I see no point in choosing sides or turning this Chris Brown/Rihanna mess into t-shirts or Mortal Kombat sketches. I’m over it.

Here’s a dose of penicillin for that ass: How about we stop trying to make light of, debate and justify the actions of victim and/or victimizer of domestic violence, and fucking confront our pathology? WARNING: THIS MEDICINE WILL NOT CAUSE DROWSINESS, AND IT WILL NOT MAKE YOU LAUGH. IF ILLNESS PERSISTS AFTER SEVEN DAYS, CEASE TAKING MEDICINE, AND CONSULT A THERAPIST.

n.b.: This morning, I received this via email. See what I mean?

Please Sign!

2009-01-10T12:54:00.000-08:00

To: The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences
This petition has been launched to object to the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences' announcement that it will give Jerry Lewis its Jean Hersholt Humanitarian Award at the Oscar Awards ceremony on February 22, 2009.

During his decades of hosting the Labor Day Telethon, Jerry Lewis has helped to perpetuate negative, stereotypical attitudes toward people with muscular dystrophy and other disabilities. Jerry Lewis and the Telethon actively promote pity as a fundraising strategy. Disabled people want RESPECT and RIGHTS, not pity and charity.

In 1990, Lewis wrote that if he had muscular dystrophy and had to use a wheelchair, he would "just have to learn to try to be good at being a half a person." During the 1992 Telethon, he said that people with MD, whom he always insists on calling "my kids," "cannot go into the workplace. There's nothing they can do." Comments like these have led disability activists and our allies to protest against Jerry Lewis. We've argued that he uses the Telethon to promote pity, a counterproductive emotion which undermines our social equality. Here's how Lewis responded to the Telethon protesters during a 2001 television interview: "Pity? You don't want to be pitied because you're a cripple in a wheelchair? Stay in your house!"

Jerry Lewis has also made derogatory comments about women and gay men. His outdated attitudes and crude remarks are dehumanizing, not humanitarian.

Therefore, we the undersigned support the actions and arguments of the coalition group The Trouble with Jerry. We protest the Academy's characterization of Jerry Lewis as a "humanitarian." And we ask that the Academy cancel its plans to give Lewis the Hersholt Humanitarian Award.
Sincerely,
The Undersigned

View Current Signatures

F*ck Burger King!!!

2008-12-20T14:47:00.000-08:00

I hate those damn whooper virgin commercials! it's the most absurd thing ever!!!

Shouts out to ann for posting this over at feministing. I can't believe that people don't understand why the shit is so problematic!!!!

Teacher sorry for binding girls in slavery lesson

2008-12-06T15:25:00.000-08:00

WHITE PLAINS, N.Y. (AP) — A white social studies teacher attempted to enliven a seventh-grade discussion of slavery by binding the hands and feet of two black girls, prompting outrage from one girl's mother and the local chapter of the NAACP. After the mother complained to Haverstraw Middle School, the superintendent said he was having "conversations with our staff on how to deliver effective lessons."

"If a student was upset, then it was a bad idea," said Superintendent Brian Monahan of the North Rockland School District in New York City's northern suburbs.

The teacher apologized to the mother who complained and her 13-year-old daughter during a meeting Thursday that also included a representative of the local NAACP. But the mother, Christine Shand of Haverstraw, said Friday she thinks the teacher should be removed from the class.

"I think the teacher should have gotten some discipline," Shand said. "I know if that was me, I would be uncomfortable going back to that class. Why should my daughter have to switch?"

Monahan refused to say what, if any, measures were taken against the teacher, Eileen Bernstein, who was still working on Friday. The school district said she was not available for comment.

"We encourage our teachers to deliver the curriculum in a variety of ways, to go beyond just reading the textbook," the superintendent said. "We don't want to discourage creativity. But this obviously went wrong because the student was upset."

On Nov. 18, Bernstein was discussing the conditions under which African captives were taken to America in slave ships. She bound the two students' hands and feet with tape and had them crawl under a desk to simulate the experience, Monahan and Shand said. Monahan said the girls were not the only blacks in the class.

Gabrielle Shand burst into tears at home, her mother said.

"There are other ways to demonstrate slavery," Christine Shand said Friday. "It doesn't matter the color of the kids, it's just not right to tie them up. My daughter is still upset, still embarrassed. She didn't go to school today."

Wilbur Aldridge, director of the local chapter of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People, said the history demonstration, first reported in The Journal News, "went wrong when she started to do that binding."

"I don't care what color, no one should be put in the position of having their hands and feet bound," he said.

Aldridge said he feared that the teacher still "didn't get it" after their meeting. He said the teacher apologized "because Gabrielle was upset, not because she admitted she did something wrong."

Shand said she had not decided whether to take any further action, including filing a lawsuit.

WTF?!

2008-12-04T08:13:00.001-08:00

really T.I.? really?!

and can we just talk for a min. about what it means that this is the cover of Black Men's Magazine?!

F*ck Ugly Betty!

2008-11-21T19:15:00.000-08:00

Now normally, I watch Ugly Betty, with a raised eyebrow and tempered laughter because where else are you going to see a queer and multiracial cast in prime time? Sure they've had questionable racial (and gender) commentary before but I'd been able to turn the other cheek, go to my happy place and laugh nervously at polished stereotypes of the hard working close knit Mexican immigrant family and evil black bitch.

But I have to say last night's episode hit a new low. Did they really try to claim that Betty was the affirmative action admission to the YETI program?! That Marc was overlooked even though he was the better candidate?! Who wrote this episode, bitter white U of M rejects? WTF?!

Betty's presentation apparently didn't warrant admission, nor did her family question the validity of this claim when she presented it. They wanted her to accept that if being Mexican helped in this one case she shouldn't care that she didn't actually "deserve" to be in the program. And Betty with her model minority heart of gold, turned down her acceptance!!!! Marc, an affluent white gay man that was able to wrangle Badgley Mischka to come to his presentation, not to mention his legion of Mode minions who were there to help as well, should have been accepted on merit. If that's not white privilege then I don't know what is! But of course there is no commentary on these resources at Marc's disposal. His ability to command a small army for his presentation compared to Betty's solo production is chalked up to his just being more prepared. The fact that Betty didn't even know about the competition until two days before the presentation deadline is treated as her bad, not the maintenance of the good ol' (gay) boys club that prevented the information from moving in her direction.

How is it that there is no commentary on Marc's white privilege but Betty's Latina heritage is the sole reason for her success? And we are also supposed to believe that all is forgiven by Marc's claim that he's not racist because some of "his hottest ex's were Latino" and Daniel's late but long winded letter of recommendation for his dutiful pet Betty absolves his neglect. It couldn't be that her magazine was actually interesting and represented a new way of imagining the women's magazine audience.

I'm not pleased. It dissapoints me too cause I thought Salma had more sense than that. Sigh . . .

It's just blatant these days!

2008-08-12T07:26:00.000-07:00

Dear VH1, WTF?!

You don't even pretend. The show is called I love Money and you have people "rescuing" a straight up coon doll out of the ocean!!! Where are the media watch dogs who will send you a bunch of angry letters about how offensive this is? I can't take it.

This is just too much.

Dear CNN

2008-07-24T09:07:00.001-07:00

Dear CNN,

F*ck you!

Sincerely,

Moya Bailey

j/k j/k! but no really. I mean seriously, what was up with Black in America?

I have to start even before the show with the months of hype, the screenings at movie theaters, the word poetry magnets with choice words like “struggle,” “pride,” and “Comcast,” the t-shirts, and then the countdown clock to airtime! CNN, don’t you think that’s all a bit absurd? So how many viewers did you get from this “unprecedented” event? How many more folks ended up watching this “CNNannigan” than would have without your hype men dispatched to the four corners of the earth?

When you begin with a black male spoken word artist to talk about “black women and the family” you are saying something about how you see “Black America.” Sunni Patterson, Staceyann Chin, Sarah Jones are all black women poets who could have offered something about black women, oh excuse me, “black women and the family” because apparently black women don’t warrant their own two hour special.

In a special called “black women and the family” I expected to see and hear from more black women. Soledad’s omniracial ass notwithstanding, the black women of “black women and the family” were in the last part of the segment. There was only one black woman was presented as an expert and that was Julianne Malveaux, who awkwardly tried to say that it’s not all bad for black women but there was no footage that was used to support her claim. What we saw, were black women failing to keep their kids motivated or in school, failing to keep a roof over their heads, failing to protect themselves from HIV/AIDS, failing to find and stay with black male husbands (because apparently there are no queer black women in America), failing at life in general.

My brilliant friend Alexis who coined the term “CNNannigan,” also watched and had this to say:

“Since this first segment seems to me to be all about the danger of the black deviant mother (from the slaveowner's mistress to the absent mother of the soon to be homeless kids, to the struggling mother (also being evicted) whose life difficulties are explained by her unfulfilled craving for a strong male figure, to the regretful woman in the interracial marriage to the woman who's nails are highlighted while her paralyzed son's words are subtitled as if they aren't English) and how to insert a patriarchal figure
(from the obnoxious Harvard guy playing test-score sugar daddy, to f*cking "marry your baby daddy day", to the generous doctor who swoops in to save young men from the mothers who have failed them) reinforced by the highlighted black male preacheresque figures stating how if you are raised by a woman you're going to have bad sex and kill everyone and die of salt saturation or whatever...”

I don’t pretend to know your intentions CNN but I’m wondering if you thought that someone (or groups of black women) would see this in the segment. Furthermore, do you care?

I’m at a loss as to how you can talk about black women and not talk about the sexism and misogyny that black women endure on a day to day basis. You’ve done stories on Sakia Gunn, not the Jersey Four but Megan Williams, not the attacks in Dunbar Village or the woman gang raped in her Philadelphia apartment, but covered the woman who died on the floor of an NYC ER while hospital staff looked on. Yet, these assaults on the humanity of black women are not part of the segment.

The systems that collude to demonize black womanhood remain obscured. Welfare reform, no living wage, the lack of affordable housing, gentrification, environmental racism (an important term you could of introduced when highlighting that a black woman can’t get a tomato in Harlem), inefficient public transportation, could all have been brought to the fore as opposed to the conclusion that black folks bring their hardships on themselves.

After watching this segment, I’m sure that this letter from a radical, single (and happy), queer, black woman may not be intelligible to you, as it was pretty clear from the segment that I don’t exist. But I’d like to send it anyway just so I know that I responded to my erasure by saying I’m (We are) still here.

Sincerely,

Moya Bailey

F*ck Darryl James!

2008-07-18T08:56:00.000-07:00

THE BRIDGE: The Hole In My End Of Our Boat
from EUR Report - http://www.eurweb.com/
By Darryl James
July 15, 2008

We can say that the Black woman has carried a great deal throughout our time in America.

Because the Black family has been under siege for that entire time, much was required of the Black woman.

Quite frankly, her strength is one of the reasons we have survived as a race where other races could not have.

We know that even up to and through the first half of the last century, the Black woman was holding things down while her man left psychotic violence and stark oppression in the South to pursue jobs and freedom for his family in the North before standing on the front lines in the Sixties to secure rights for his people.

But we also know that Welfare came to destroy the Black family by making it easier for the family to survive in the man’s absence.

And we know that integration helped to destroy the Black community, which was not prepared for Black flight or the devastation of Crack Cocaine nor the privatization of prisons.

We also know that feminist propaganda has silently polluted the minds of many Black women, who now view Black men as the enemy.

As a race, we’ve come through a great deal. And for the most part, we did it together.

The difference was that in previous times when Black men were under siege, Black women worked with them to hold the community together and we were all better for it. Now, many Black women feel that they have it all together, that they have done enough for “us” and that it’s time for Black men to get it together.

Any Black woman who is alive and under 50 today is under some beautiful delusion to pretend to be tired of suffering anything at the hands of Black men or tired of doing anything for Black men, because it just hasn’t happened in their generation.

Frankly, Black people as a race haven’t done anything for themselves in decades—it’s been all about self-preservation as individuals.

If you are a Black woman under 50 today, the heavy lifting was done by your grandmother, not even your mother. You haven’t run any slaves through an underground railroad, no one has legally raped and/or forcibly impregnated you, and you haven’t carried the burden of the race on your back.

Many of the Black women who claim to be tired haven’t even held a family together, if they even have a family of their own.

We didn’t begin to seriously deteriorate as a race—men or women—until the end of the Sixties, when many Negroes decided to become shiny and new and abandon everything remotely connected to the community.

Really, any contemporary Black woman who feels that she has been carrying the race is crazy because the race is doing worse than ever.

Yet, some of today’s Black women act so terribly put upon, as though they are perfect and Black men are holding back the race.

In response to my column called “Man Up,” chastising men to stand up and be men, one insane woman wrote “not only are we (Black women) ready…but a lot of ‘outsiders’ are ready for Black men to finally get their sh-t together, too.”

Really? Black women and the world are simply waiting for Black men to stop being lazy bags of crap? The answer, of course, is no.

But what is most disturbing is such a sentiment accompanied by little concern about the lagging of Black men.

Black women, even if you believe yourselves to be ahead of Black men, why aren’t you concerned about the hole in MY end of OUR boat? If you believe that we are sinking, you must realize that you will sink as well.

And while no thinking Black man has a problem with Black women working to improve the condition of Black women, the destruction comes with pretending that Black men are in some way holding Black women back.

Some Black women are even retelling the story of the Civil Rights Movement, claiming that it was oppressive to Black women, yet the only “evidence” of that is a quote from an obscure member of the Black Panthers, who admitted to being a rapist and a lover of white women, but who never represented any great portion of Black men--then or now.

In order to truly believe this lie, we have to ignore the Black women who were a vital part of the Movement. We would also have to ignore the FACT that the Civil Rights Act of 1965 was the first time that the rights of women were mentioned since they were enfranchised.

And, we would have to ignore the FACT that Affirmative Action benefited Black women more than Black men.

But, really, the question is this: Why are we even having that discussion?

The answer is that some Black women find power in their own victimhood, which gives them an excuse for poor behavior, while accepting no responsibility.

If they can assert that Black men fail to protect Black women and are generally the oppressors of Black women, then there is less responsibility for Black women in their own foibles, including out of wedlock pregnancy; inability to find and sustain relationships; promiscuity leading to sexual diseases; and so on.

These are the same problems we find amongst Black men, but instead of coming together to resolve these issues for the community, too many women are choosing to lay the blame at the feet of men, while attempting to solve the issues solely for women.

We can only resolve these problems together, because they affect us all—men AND women, instead of pretending they are the sole issues of Black women caused solely by Black men.

Sadly, too many Black women have spent time telling the world how horrible Black men are.

But guess who has been listening and who has bought into that?

A number of today’s Black men and Black boys, many of who have been raised by single Black women.

We all know that there are a number of Black men who are weak, sad and sorry. The problem is when Black women pretend that those weak men represent ALL Black man simply because these crappy men are all the men they know.

Evil, ignorant Black man haters take this to extremes, vacillating between telling men how horrible they are and demanding that those same men deliver the things they desire. In search of something called the “Benevolent Thug.”

If we believe what these women say, we must pretend that over the past thirty to forty years, the male side of the Black race has either by sheer will or by force of nature simply fallen down, while the female side has become better than ever.

Whatever the case, no one is asking Black women to fix Black men.

And no one is asking Black women to stop working to improve the lot of Black women.

Really, there are only two things that Black men need Black women to do.

1—Stop telling the world and us what horrible bags of crap you think we are.

2—Stop dating and having children with Black men you know are weak and sorry, so you won’t think we are all that way.

Now, before we all take sides and line up to lob more grenades across the gender divide, let me ask one simple question of the Black women who come off as singularly concerned about the plight of Black females: “Do you really believe that the race can survive if many of us are torn between raising the condition of the community and raising the condition of one sex within the community?

And, if you seriously believe that Black women are far out in front of Black men, are you concerned enough to take decisive and affirmative action to bridge the gender divide?

Contemplate these questions before you accuse me of hating Black women.

Unless you are willing to work for both men AND women, then you care nothing about our people.

This is about getting more of us to see each other. This is about getting more of us to talk to each other instead of at or about each other.

It is about us, which means that most of us should stand together.

The good news is that Black men across the nation are starting to realize that we must come to our own rescue and that we must take action, no matter who is coming to diminish us.

And, Black men are standing up. For the truth. For their families. For each other and contrary to popular opinion, for Black women.

Black men are creating mentoring programs, rites of passage programs and other programs designed to place more Black men in front of Black boys.

The only real assistance we need is to be left alone.

Even if you disagree with us, you should support us by stopping the lies and hate wherever they appear.

Or, you can sit back, hate us and do nothing.

I’m okay with that.

Just, please, don’t get in the way. And stop telling the world how much you hate us. It makes you look bad, too.

Black women, ask yourselves: Are you concerned with the hole that is in the bottom of my end of the boat?

If you are not, then do not complain, as we both continue to sink into a river of despair.

"We ourselves have to lift the levels of our community, the standard of our community to a higher level, make our own society beautiful so that we will be satisfied. We’ve got to change our minds about each other."

-Malcolm X

Darryl James is an award-winning author of the forthcoming powerful anthology “Notes From The Edge.” Discounted Autographed and Numbered Pre-Release copies can be ordered at www.darryljames.com. He released his first mini-movie, “Crack,” and this year, will release his first full-length documentary. View previous installments of this column at www.bridgecolumn.proboards36.com. Reach James at djames@theblackgendergap.com.

WTF?!

2008-07-13T16:56:00.000-07:00

I'm about to get a gun. no really i'm about to!

check out the latest from Plies.

My hands been gettin me in a lot of trouble so...

(Chorus)
Please excuse my hands
They just wanna touch
They just wanna feel
They don’t mean no harm
Baby just excuse my hands (whoa whoa)
Baby please excuse my hands
I apologize they have a one track mind
To squeeze on your behind
Baby just excuse my hands (whoa whoa)
Please excuse my hands

(Plies)
Wit my hands I can make u do a lot of thangs
Have u engagin in some activities u can’t explain
Leave my fingerprints on every inch yo damn frame
Wit dis one finger I could make u get off the chain
Get to lickin n my hands they get they own brain
They wanna touch ya they wanna rub ya they wanna feel yo frame
Run my hands through yo hair n go against yo grain
Let me message ya baby and help ease yo pain
You wanna get comfortable take your shorts off I can help you change
Wanna take my hands off but I cant they jus gon call yo name
If I can’t squeeze ya and I cant hold ya it don’t feel the same
It aint my fault baby my hands is the one to blame

(Chorus)
Please excuse my hands
They just wanna touch
They just wanna feel
They don’t mean no harm
Baby just excuse my hands (whoa whoa)
Baby please excuse my hands
I apologize they have a one track mind
To squeeze on your behind
Baby just excuse my hands (whoa whoa)
Please excuse my hands
[ Please Excuse My Hands lyrics found on http://www.completealbumlyrics.com ]

(Dream)
Imma do ya like this and do ya like that
I promise u gon like the way I touch on you
So jump up on dis biz and let me see that
I promise u gon like da way I feel on you
I’m gonna hump til yo body say "ohhh"
Imma do it til yo mouth breathes "no more"
I said excuse my hands she said "boy stop playin n make love to yo number one fan"

(Jamie Foxx)
Please excuse my hands

(Verse 2)
Before I kiss ya or make love to ya I wanna touch
Can you please face the wall u bout to get strip searched
My hands talkin to me they want now what’s under yo skirt
Let me be the one who do the honors n help u wit yo shirt
My hands don’t like to be unememployed they like to work
I been told my hands are lil Manish they like to flirt
God knows woman the sexy thing u put on is us
My hand cravin yo lil sweet body its gettin worse
I wanna thank you and your body fo helpin me write this verse
My hands will neva leave yo body baby they so loyal
Do me a favor look on the dresser and grab that baby oil
Aint got to be the one that do it my hands gon spoil ya

(Chorus)
Please excuse my hands
They just wanna touch
They just wanna feel
They don’t mean no harm
Baby just excuse my hands (whoa whoa)
Baby please excuse my hands
I apologize they have a one track mind
To squeeze on your behind
Baby just excuse my hands (whoa whoa)
Please excuse my hands

(Dream)
Keep doin it keep doin it keep doin it to me
Keep doin it keep doin it I swear I’ll neva leave
Keep doin it keep doin it keep doin it shawty shawty
Woke up in the spot ah
Yea the boys on fire
I’m wit my nigga plies

Here's what I sent to v103:

To whom it may concern:

I'd like to lodge a complaint as a listener. The new Plies song "Please excuse my hands" is beyond offensive; this song suggests something just short of rape! Are we as women supposed to "excuse" men's unwanted groping of our bodies?! Are we suppose to be cool with men feeling like they can touch us whenever they want? It really shows how men don't even think of women as human beings. If a man said to another man "please excuse my hands" you'd understand that to be a problem. Beyond the homoeroticism implied, men understand that you don't violate another man's personal space like that. Why is this same courtesy not afforded to women? Do women's hands, independent of their owner's instruction, find themselves groping men? Just about every song on the radio suggests that women are only valuable because of how they look and their sexual availability to men. The worse thing you can call a man is a woman or gay, which in our community is read as synonymous. This is crazy! Please read bell hook's essay "Reconstructing Black Masculinity" in her 1992 work Black Looks. she writes, "What might black men do for themselves and for black people if they were not socialized by white supremacist capitalist patriarchy to focus their attention on their penises?"

Hancock--some bull

2008-07-12T22:58:00.000-07:00

Sooo problematic: race, class, gender, disability, magical negro syndrome. "Yessa massah, iz go ta jail fo' ya maaasah." The worst movie i've ever seen in my whole black life! Action: Write a letter and say a prayer

Michelle Obama

2008-07-10T11:46:00.001-07:00

What's happening to humanity?

2008-07-06T15:22:00.000-07:00

Woman Dies in Hospital While Staff Looks On

Thanks for fwd. this amy. What is wrong with the world today?!!

Brava!!!

2008-06-19T08:24:00.000-07:00

In my email today:

----

Dear Friends:

I am one of the contributors to the anthology Be A Father to Your Child,
which focuses on encouraging healthy fatherhood development in the black
community. We felt it necessary to issue the following statement and petition in
response to the recent verdict in R. Kelly's child pornography trial.

Please read and, if you agree, sign and forward this to your networks.

Sincerely,
Jelani Cobb

*Statement of Black Men Against the Exploitation of Black Women*

Six years have gone by since we first heard the allegations that R. Kelly had filmed himself having sex with an underage girl. During that time we have seen the videotape being hawked on street corners in Black communities, as if the dehumanization of one of our own was not at stake. We have seen entertainers rally around him and watched his career reach new heights despite the grave possibility that he had molested and urinated on a 13-year old girl. We saw African Americans purchase millions of his records despite the long history of such charges swirling around the singer. Worst of all, we have witnessed the sad vision of Black people cheering his acquittal with a fervor usually reserved for community heroes and shaken our heads at the stunning lack of outrage over the verdict in the broader Black community.

Over these years, justice has been delayed and it has been denied. Perhaps a jury can accept R. Kelly's absurd defense and find "reasonable doubt" despite the fact that the film was shot in his home and featured a man who was identical to him. Perhaps they doubted that the young woman in the courtroom was, in fact, the same person featured in the ten year old video. But there is no doubt about this: some young Black woman was filmed being degraded and exploited by a much older Black man, some daughter of our community was left unprotected, and somewhere another Black woman is being molested, abused or raped and our callous handling of this case will make it that much more difficult for her to come forward and be believed. And each of us is responsible for it.

We have proudly seen the community take to the streets in defense of Black men who have been the victims of police violence or racist attacks, but that righteous outrage only highlights the silence surrounding this verdict.

We believe that our judgment has been clouded by celebrity-worship; we believe that we are a community in crisis and that our addiction to sexism has reached such an extreme that many of us cannot even recognize child molestation when we see it.

We recognize the absolute necessity for Black men to speak in a single, unified voice and state something that should be absolutely obvious: that the women of our community are full human beings, that we cannot and will not tolerate the poisonous hatred of women that has already damaged our families, relationships and culture.

We believe that our daughters are precious and they deserve our protection. We believe that Black men must take responsibility for our contributions to this terrible state of affairs and make an effort to change our lives and our communities.

This is about more than R. Kelly's claims to innocence. *It is about our survival as a community*. Until we believe that our daughters, sisters, mothers, wives and friends are worthy of justice, until we believe that rape, domestic violence and the casual sexism that permeates our culture are absolutely unacceptable, until we recognize that the first priority of any community is the protection of its young, we will remain in this tragic dead-end.

We ask that you:

o Sign your name if you are a Black male who supports this statement:

http://www.petitiononline.com/rkelly/petition.html

o Forward this statement to your entire network and ask other Black males to sign as well

o Make a personal pledge to never support R. Kelly again in any form or fashion, unless he publicly apologizes for his behavior and gets help for his long-standing sexual conduct, in his private life and in his music

o Make a commitment in your own life to never to hit, beat, molest, rape, or exploit Black females in any way and, if you have, to take ownership for your behavior, seek emotional and spiritual help, and, over time, become a voice against all forms of Black female exploitation

o Challenge other Black males, no matter their age, class or educational background, or status in life, if they engage in behavior and language that is exploitative and or disrespectful to Black females in any way. If you say nothing, you become just as guilty.

o Learn to listen to the voices, concerns, needs, criticisms, and challenges of Black females, because they are our equals, and because in listening we will learn a new and different kind of Black manhood

We support the work of scholars, activists and organizations that are helping to redefine Black manhood in healthy ways. Additional resources are listed below.

Books:
Who's Gonna Take the Weight, Kevin Powell
New Black Man, Mark Anthony Neal
Deals with the Devil and Other Reasons to Riot, Pearl Cleage
Traps: African American Men on Gender and Sexuality, Rudolph Byrd and Beverly Guy-Sheftall

Films:
I Am A Man: Black Masculinity in America, by Byron Hurt
Hip Hop: Beyond Beats and Rhymes, by Byron Hurt
NO! The Rape Documentary, by Aishah Simmons

Organizations
The 2025 Campaign: www.2025bmb.org
Men Stopping Violence: www.menstoppingviolence.org

R. Kelly Aquitted

2008-06-15T06:57:00.000-07:00

What's wrong with the world?! Any thoughts on how we should respond to this?

He's so smug about the situation too! In a recent guest spot on Raheem DeVaughn's "Customer remix" Kelly says "Thirsty? I got some bomb ass lemonade . . ." Really?!!!

Sasha and Malia Obama

2008-06-13T09:22:00.001-07:00

This is just painful. More at Michelle Watch

Miso’ Soup: On the liquid misogyny the media feeds us

2008-06-12T15:28:00.000-07:00

So I’ve got something new that I’m heated about. Tommy Lee and Ludacris have an ad on television promoting the new Planet Green TV Network. In it, they verbally spar over which of them is more “green” with Ludacris brandishing a chain purportedly made from recycle rims and Lee pointing to a tattoo of his etched with soy ink. Luda then says, “ . . . you remember the hot tub right? I filled it up with all women instead of water, saved 150 gallons.”
WTF?!
This pisses me off for several reasons.
1. Women < 150 gallons of water. I don’t think I can find a better example of men seeing women as objects rather than human beings. Women are used to replace water! They are in fact less valuable than water and therefore an acceptable, supposedly humorous substitute. I think there are a host of legitimately inanimate objects that could be used to replace water but what’s cleverer than having a rapper known for his problematic depictions of women delivering said phrase?
2. People green lighted this shit. Lots of folks saw this before it appeared on my television screen and apparently thought it was funny. This is really scary. This is yet another drop (or maybe splash) into the bucket of women’s degradation in the public sphere.
3. Male celebrities telling us how to be green, through a glorified pissing contest. I don’t really understand the green movement as being about one-upsmanship, particularly not among the wealthy who are the biggest users/abusers of resources in this country that uses/abuses more than any other. What about them setting some real goals that would make a difference like no more plastic bottles on tour, energy efficient stage lighting, or heaven forbid, no more private jet setting? The commercial sets up the green movement to be about reducing one’s individual impact instead of generating collective strategies for changing how we live and consume as a whole.
4. Why is there no public outcry? Even as I’ve mentioned it to friends I don’t get the level of outrage I’m expecting. Have we become so desensitized that even blatant woman hatred elicits no reaction? When did misogyny become so innocuous that it could be used to support social justice causes? This commercial maybe isn’t anything new in that regard; just think of PETA. But what does it say that our movements are so disparate that one will sell out the other for its own ends?

If you’re pissed please email Bryan Hughes, VP of Communications for Planet Green at Bryan_Hughes@discovery.com.

Why Al Why?

2008-04-28T20:34:00.000-07:00

Why would this ever be an appropriate metaphor? I'm pissed! Aren't you supposed to pretend you care about women al?

Al on the "abortion of justice"

This is just too much!!!!

2008-03-31T18:30:00.000-07:00

Do black children need this?!!! there aren't even words sometimes

Tyra Must Be Stopped!

2008-02-29T06:17:00.000-08:00

Ok this is just ridiculous!!! Really can we do a letter writing campaign please?! She is out of control!!!!

http://shoppingblog.dallasnews.com/archives/2008/02/americas-next-top-model-posing.html
http://crunktastical.blogspot.com/2008/02/why-must-i-sigh.html

Bros before Hoes

2008-02-05T18:07:00.001-08:00

I could not believe this image the first time I saw it (which was a few seconds ago). All I can say is wow. It's crazy that misogyny, patriarchy, and the overwhelming concept that race always comes first has created such an image (which is in reference to such an important political event). I know that some may just think its a cute little thing. However, for me I see the western worlds historical views, cultural values, and social hierarchy between race and gender clearly being displayed.

Western World Social and Cultural Values in Simple Mathematical Equations:

Male > Female
White > Black
White Male > Black Male > White Female (this one can be a little tricky depending on the situation at hand)
Black Male > Black Female < White Female
White Male > White Female
Black Male > White Female
Race > Gender

Packer Bikini Girls and Sissy's

2008-01-22T06:39:00.000-08:00

This past Sunday January 20th, while watching the NFC Championship game between the New York Giants and the Green Bay Packers, I was reminded of the many ways that homophobia thrives within American society.

In an attempt to show their proud for the Green Bay Packers, a group of young women (Packer Bikini Girls) wore yellow bikini tops during temps of -4° and a windchill of -24° at the historically sold out Lambeau Field in Green Bay, Wisconsin. In response to this, an anchorman said "Now doesn't that make me feel like a sissy." I couldn't believe it.

WTF?!!!

2007-10-31T05:44:00.000-07:00

Since when are these folks in any position to try and make a song about the trials and tribulations of sex work?

Artist: Wyclef Jean f/ Akon, Lil Wayne, Nia
Album: The Second Wind (2007)
Song: Sweetest Girl

Lyrics :

[Intro: (Wyclef Jean (Lil Wayne))]
Some live for the bill
Some kill for the bill
She wined for the bill
Grind for the bill
(and she used to be the sweetest girl)
Some steal for the bill, if they got to pay they bill
(and she used to be the sweetest girl)
Tonight Wyclef, Akon, Weezy and Nia

[Verse 1: (Wyclef Jean)]
High school she was that girl that make me do the hula hoop around the gym
(Just to get a peek again, she's a 10)
High school she was
That girl that make me do the hula hoop around the gym
(Just to get a peek again, she's a 10)
Never thought she would come and work for the president
Mr. George Washington (where my money at?)
She thought he'd call (where my money at?)
She had a good day, bad day, sunny day, rainy day
All she wanna know is (where my money at?)
Closed legs don't get fed, go out there and make my bread
All you wanna know is (where my money at?)
She ended up in a road car, bruised up, scarred hard
All you wanna know is (where my money at?)
She thought he'd call (where my money at?)

[Chorus: (Akon) ] (x2)
Cos I'mma tell you like you told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)

[Verse 2: (Akon)]
Pimpin' got harder cos, hoes got smarter
On the strip is something they don't wanna be a part of
Rather be up in the club shakin' for a thug
For triple times the money and spending it how they wanna
They got they mind on they money, money on they mind
They got they finger on the trigger, hand on the nines
See everyday they feel the struggle, but staying on they grind
And ain’t nobody takin’ from us, and that’s the bottom line

But I know there's a drop in the block
You move slow
You getting' pressure from cops
you don't know not to lay low
Because 25 to life is no joke
To all my real gorillas thuggin'
On top of corners every day strugglin'
All the beautiful women getting' money
Washin' them dollar bills like laundry

[Verse 3: (Lil Wayne)]
(Weezy) She used to be (she used to be the sweetest girl)

She used to be the sweetest girl ever
Now she like sour ameretta
She wears a dress to the T like the letter
And if you make it rain she will be under the weather
She used to run track back in high school
Now she tricks off the track right by school
She takes a loss cos she don't wanna see her child lose
So respect her, I'll pay up for the time used
And then she runs to the pastor
And he tells her there will be a new chapter
But she feels no different after
And then she asks him…

[Chorus: (Akon) ] (x2)
Cos’ I’ma tell you like Wu told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin’ dollar dollar bill y’all (dollar, dollar bill y’all)
Singin’ dollar dollar bill y’all(dollar, dollar bill y’all)

[Outro: (Wyclef Jean)]
Some live for the bill
Some kill for the bill (where my money at?)
She wined for the bill
Grind for the bill (where my money at?)
Some steal for the bill, if they got to pay the bill (where my money at?)
Tonight Wyclef, Akon, Weezy and Nia

My People, My People

2007-10-12T12:43:00.000-07:00

You thought paper bag tests were over? Think again. A Detroit nightclub promoter released this flyer for an upcoming party. (After a huge internet backlash, the party has been cancelled.)