tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-27062825.post-85082444009659888282008-04-29T10:23:00.000-07:002008-04-29T10:25:19.434-07:00************************************************<br />"SIMPLY SUCCESS" - April 29, 2008<br />=======================================<br />>Helping You Create What Matters MOST in Life and Work<br /> Bruce Elkin: Life/Work Renewal Coach<br /> Personal - Professional - Organizational<br /> http://www.BruceElkin.com<br /> Sent to subscribers only. Names are never shared or sold!<br /> To leave list or change email address, scroll to bottom.<br />**************************************************<br /><br />Hi All!<br />This will be the last post of "Simply Success" for a month. Next<br />week, I head to the Canadian Rockies to celebrate a big birthday,<br />and hang out with old friends from an important time in my life.<br /><br />I'm looking forward to re-connecting, relaxing, and reflecting on<br />my life, work, and future I most want to create. (This will be only<br />the second non-working or writing vacation I've taken in 10 years),<br /><br /><br />While doing so, I will ponder reflections made by my colleague Tom<br />Hueuerman in his piece "Vital Aging", which describes the joys and<br />challenges of striving to live well in the "last third of life."<br /><br /> http://www.amorenaturalway.com/pamphlets/detail.asp?ID=153<br /><br />I really looking forward to this vacation, and to the life that<br />follows.<br /><br /><br />And, at the other end of the great arc of life -- for those of you<br />in the Vancouver area, or who know folks Greater Vancouver,<br />check out this environmental day-camp program to help kids develop<br />a solid appreciation for the Earth and its systems: "Friends<br />Uniting for Nature" --<br /> www.funcamps.ca <http://www.funcamps.ca><br />-- are taking registrations for the summer now. Check them out!<br /><br />Disclosure: my lovely daughter developed and will coordinate it!<br />--------------<br /> <br /><br /><br />>PREVIEW<br />=========<br />This week's post includes:<br /> • The link to "Vital Aging" above,<br /> • A piece on "Stumbling Into Happiness,"<br /> • Links to 2 fascinating TED talks on "Happiness", <br /> • The usual "quotable quotes, and<br /> • A list of tools and resources I recommend.<br />--------------------------------<br /><br /><br /><br />>STUMBLING INTO HAPPINESS<br />====================<br /><br />When I was a young high school teacher, a student put up a poster<br />in my room. On it was a picture of a butterfly sitting on a leaf. <br /><br />The text read, "Happiness is like a butterfly. If you chase after<br />it, it flies away. But if you just sit quietly and wait, it will<br />sometimes light on your shoulder.<br /><br />It sounded good to me, stressed and harried as I was with the<br />vicissitudes of teaching 5 times 30 kids a day, in a<br />bureaucracy-ridden school system that seemed more focused on<br />perpetuating itself than truly bringing out the best in kids. <br /><br />Sitting quietly and waiting for that butterfly seemed like a good<br />and sane thing to do. I quit teaching in schools and became a<br />free-lance experiential educator.<br /><br />As I got older, wiser, and further removed from fossilized forms of<br />educating, I realized that happiness was not just something you<br />waited for. I was much happier working with kids -- and adults --<br />outdoors, and in the mountains, than I'd been in schools.<br /><br />Along the way, I discovered Barry Neill Kaufman, founder of The<br />Option Institute,<www.option.org/> who wrote the book "Happiness Is<br />A Choice." That approach fit better for me.<br /><br />I've practiced choosing happiness ever since. In my creating work,<br />the choice to be happy is one of what we call "foundation choices"<br />-- one of the guiding values we orient our lives by.<br /><br />Still there were times that, in spite of choosing to be happy, I<br />was not. I knew that choice by itself was not enough, and that you<br />had to also take action. But which actions?<br /><br />I spent many years pondering that question and finally decided that<br />the answer was creating almost anything with meaning that engages<br />you with life. And absorbs you in the process of creating.<br /><br />Through learning and mastering the process of CREATING what matters<br />most, I learned that happiness emerges from the process, from the<br />doing, as well as from the result. And that sometimes, you just<br />stumble on happiness as you move from creation to creation.<br /><br />Recently, I came across two interesting approaches to<br />happiness that I would like to share with you. <br />The first, "Stumbling On Happiness", by Daniel Gilbert is also the<br />subject of the fascinating TED talk that you can access at <br />< http://tinyurl.com/5rsjcl >.<br /><br />Gilbert questions whether we can accurately predict what will make<br />us happy, or sad. He takes us on a scientific exploration to sort<br />outthe underpinnings of happiness. <br /><br />As the title suggests, he thinksthat we overrate our ability to<br />control our lives and the world, and are more likely to stumble on<br />happiness than create it. It's an interesting approach and the<br />simple science he shares is illuminating.<br /><br />But, I, like Mathieu Ricard (the Dalai Llama's French translator,<br />and ex-scientist turned Buddhist monk) believe that you can create<br />happiness.<br /><br />Ricard, in his book "Happiness" calls it life's most important<br />skill, and offers an array of examples and exercises for<br />cultivating happiness, or true well-being. View his TED talk on<br />"Habits of Happiness" at: http://tinyurl.com/3tlopa<br /><br />Naturally, much of what Ricard says is based on Buddhist teachings<br />such as detaching ourselves from the objects of our desires,<br />shifting from "needing" things and experiences to "wanting" them,<br />and learning to notice and change our thoughts.<br /><br />Also, bringing us full circle to the butterfly quote above, he<br />recommends mindful meditation -- just sitting quietly and watching<br />your thoughts flow by -- as a technique for creating happiness. If<br />you do it right, and practice consistently, that butterfly just<br />might light on your shoulder.<br /><br />So whether happiness is a choice, or a skill, or something that<br />just happens to us and we stumble over it, it is a critical part of<br />our lives. We do best to pay attention to it, and cultivate it, or<br />the spaces in which it can emerge.<br /><br />What makes you happy? <br /><br />What do you do to make yourself happy?<br /><br />What more could you do to create happiness, or to up your chances<br />of stumbling on it? Now? And in the future?<br />---------------------------<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />> ARE YOU DOING WHAT YOU LOVE WITH YOUR LIFE? <br /> Would you like to CREATE what truly matters to you in life/work?<br />=========================================<br />I work with competent, capable people who are stuck, stalled, or<br />struggling with complicated life/work challenges. <br /><br />I help them develop the SKILLS, STRUCTURE, and SUPPORT to make the<br />complex simple, and create RESULTS that matter. I encourage and<br />support PRACTICE as they turn visions into reality! <br /><br />>If you would like my fr.ee 7-page info package, e-mail me with<br />"Coaching Info" as the subject at Bruce@BruceElkin.com<br /><br />I can help you find what you love-and create a life that shows it!<br /><br />I am interviewing now for late May to July, and into the summer. <br />If you're interested, I recommend you let me know ASAP. <br /><br />>I'll be away May 8 to 27 to celebrate my birthday. So, if you're<br />interested in early summer coaching, act now. E-mail me with<br />"Coaching Info" as the subject at Bruce@BruceElkin.com<br />---------------<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />>QUOTABLE QUOTES:<br />=============<br />"One must practice the things which produce happiness, since if<br />that is present we have everything and if it is absent we do<br />everything in order to have it."<br /> Epicurus<br /><br />"One cannot divine nor forecast the conditions that will make<br />happiness; one only stumbles upon them by chance, in a lucky hour,<br />at the world's end somewhere, and holds fast to the days, as to<br />fortune or fame."<br /> -- Willa Cather<br /><br />"Happiness does not come automatically. It is not a gift that good<br />fortune bestows upon us and a reversal of fortune takes back. It<br />depends on us alone. One does not become happy overnight, but with<br />patient labor, day after day. Happiness is constructed, and that<br />requires effort and time. In order to become happy, we have to<br />learn how to change ourselves."<br /> -- Luca And Francesco Cavalli-Sforza<br /><br />"Seeking happiness outside ourselves is like waiting for sunshine<br />in a cave facing north."<br /> Tibetan Saying<br /><br />"A good life is one that is characterized by complete absorption in<br />what one does."<br /> - Jeanne Nakamura & Mihaly Cziksentmihalyi<br />--------------------<br /><br /><br />Your happiness is important! Watch the videos. Read the books.<br /><br />Think about what makes you happy, and what can do to increase your<br />chances of stumbling on true happiness. Are you doing any of these<br />things, now? What else could you do?<br /><br />If there is any way I can help you with life design, high<br />performance, or getting unstuck, please let me know. It may not<br />make you happy overnight, but it will sure increase your chances of<br />stumbling on it.<br /><br />Enjoy!<br />Bruce<br />**************************************************<br />> BRUCE ELKIN: <br /> Personal, Professional, and Organization Renewal Coach<br />>Call: 250.388.7210 www.BruceElkin.com Or Skype Me!<br />**************************************************BruceElkin.comhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14786496635593482700noreply@blogger.com