Missionary Gas

Who's the brave one?

2009-07-08T13:25:00.001+01:00

It was refreshing to get back to the Andes after two weeks on the Pacific Coast. Mind you Lima was a relaxing break, and the food fantastic in variety and quality.

Not to be outdone, Colombian friends had left us a culinary treat: a packet of large, fried ants. I haven´t quite got the appetite yet, but Olwen can't resist any kind of food.

Also waiting was a request for help from an Hispanic radio station in Texas. Working at maintaining their name, Radio Impacto, they asked me, "Where would Christians be in the after-life: on the new earth or in the new heaven?" I told them, "Yes".

One thing that's impressive here is the way people give up their seats for Olwen on the crowded Metro. Today she got sitting beside a man with a tube down his throat. He made one of those pleasing comments that leave you nervous: how brave she was coming to Colombia.

Next Tuesday a conference on Calvin starts: now there was a brave man - no ants, no Texans just living a life according to the Bible.

Photo: Our kind host in Lima (in the middle)

Like a Harry Potter scene

2009-07-01T16:03:00.002+01:00

"The day never works out as you plan", commented Olwen as we walked the third mile home in the dark.

It was our last free day of the holidays and we had set out in the morning for a country park on the Central Highway outside Lima. But there were no buses about, in fact any buses that dared to venture out risked having their windows smashed. You could not even travel down the Central Highway because of stoning. There was a bus strike.

So we walked to the Pacific Coast which was covered in mist like a Harry Potter scene. On a cliff top restaurant we ate salads and then decided to continue along the Costa Verde to visit a family. The father had been a Peruvian pastor for years and now was almost completely paralysed with Parkinson's disease.

The one audible word he spoke that afternoon was "Amen" after we prayed. Sometimes you get an idea why days don't work out as you planned.

Photo: View along Lima's Costa Verde with the cross dominant

How to handcuff a bus

2009-06-24T18:34:00.001+01:00

I wasn't going to write an email this week as we're on our holidays, but this morning I saw a bus being arrested. We arrived in Lima last Friday and are staying with Clive and Ruth in a pleasant residential suburb where pavements are flat, zebra crossings numerous and the local gym is called "Gold".

Being a golden oldie I was making my way to this institution, when I saw about 20 policemen looking lost outside a bank. Then someone shouted, "Here's one" and with a blowing of referee's whistles the 20 pot-bellied men in dark green jogged slowly to a dirty white bus stuck in the traffic.

The bus had done something seriously wrong and needed to be arrested. But how do you handcuff a bus? Easy, with a breakdown lorry, and one arrived.

Peru's population is 12% evangelical and this means churches and Christians are everywhere. But so are social sins, corruption and crime.

Does missionary work have a sell-by date?

Photo: Errant bus being led away

What would Calvin think?

2009-06-16T23:30:00.003+01:00

The semester´s been finished 10 days and my time´s gone on reading, writing and typing. Reading up on John Calvin for a conference in July, writing for a couple of internet sites and typing to familiarize myself with new webpage software.

One´s colleagues are the secretary who checks my spanish, the man who organizes the conference and 2,350 subscribers in cyberspace. Today I received an emailed request for help. It was an ex-student struggling with what´s called, "double predestination": God chooses some and rejects others, so how can we be held responsible? Ugghhh... the world of Spanish theological education is like an octapus grabbing you painfully where you least expect it.

To add to this mix, some in the hermeneutics class produced a YouTube video on Literary Figures in the Bible http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyPDyFhZZe0 and Olwen uploaded a Blog with a show of Zero Stress products http://www.olwenford.blogspot.com/ .

From Calvin´s church in Geneva missionaries were sent to South America, and it was awful for them. Thank you Lord things are so easy today. On Friday we leave for Lima for 2 weeks break.

Photo: Third year hermeneutics' students on YouTube

Parrot's stick broke

2009-06-10T15:53:00.004+01:00

Yesterday afternoon was the big one for the sewing room leaders. They were going out to test the market. It's all very well repairing things for friends and exporting tea cozies to Lewis, but Zero Stress needs a viable Colombian market. One that will provide stable income for the sewers. Olwen, Elena and Elizabeth headed off to the five main tourist shops with samples of their products.

Unfortunately it was a bad start when the parrot's stick broke. This refers to a wall hanging of a parrot supported on a piece of stick. For the sake of realism it is appropriate that this happened: it being a most substantial parrot.

The first shop they visited, in the Botanic Gardens, was shut for renovation. Probably a blessing if you're hoping to sell an artificial parrot on a bust perch. At the second one, in the city's Art Museum, the buyer wasn´t in until Friday. Shops three, four and five, were a great success. Quality and novelty is what people are looking for: the parrot's hour had come.

Now the implications of the commercial interest begin. They'll be trickier than getting that creature an unbreakable stick.

Photo: Parrot in happier times

Early morning phone call

2009-06-03T01:32:00.007+01:00

We have two starting times in our house. At 5 am my day kicks off with stretches followed by jogging (slow) or weights (junior). At 6 am Olwen staggers into the sitting room wanting to know what time it is and looking for a cup of tea and her Bible. I´m unable to appreciate why she won´t join me earlier on. I guess she´s sussed that over-straining yourself doesn't equal godliness.

Today was slightly different. Having just finished her first cup of tea, the phone went. It was Gonzalo the maintenance man, wanting to know where she was. The work had begun: walls were being knocked down and electrics were to be measured. Zero Stress sewing room was expanding to twice its floor space.

The surprising thing is that the growth comes not because of more impoverished students' wives but from the commitment of the impoverished world outside. It means workshops, mini enterprises and clothing repairs; even helping people save the money they´ve earned. It´s like a Trustee Savings Bank built on cotton and thread with a lot of love.

Classes finish on Friday. Brilliant, I´m exhausted. And I keep telling her it´s not the exercising.

Photo: Keeping an eye on the work, and me

The James Bond solution

2009-05-27T15:10:00.003+01:00

A couple of weeks ago I wrote about the danger of walking around a city where over 2 million people are mixed up with cars and motorbikes.

To complement this, on Sunday morning we had a real-life scaletrix experience as we journeyed to church. For those in the UK taxis are a pleasant luxury, a poor man´s chauffeur service. Here they're the cheap and risky option of being hurtled across town. Public transport works on the principle that roads are a race track to collect passengers, get rid of them and then get more. They offer an Alton Towers experience.

So our taxi speeded along a busy dual carriageway. Unfortunately, it aimed directly towards the back of a line of stopped vehicles, and at a speed that needed a James Bond solution. But thanks to your prayers: Olwen shrieked, the driver said "Oh", and milliseconds before impact we swerved into a lane of moving traffic without hitting anyone.

The driver blamed the policewoman who had stopped the cars to let people cross the road. Olwen congratulated the driver. And I realized my blood pressure tablets were ineffective for the James Bond solution.

Photo: Seen from earth and the heavens: taxis are yellow with registration numbers of the roof

No more Colombian coffee

2009-05-20T15:06:00.003+01:00

It's been a bad time for the students. A week ago it was announced they would loose their free mid-morning coffee, that those who hadn't paid their fees would no longer be served meals and that no funds had arrived for student grants. Being £45,000 in debt the Seminary could no longer afford any more subsidies.

The thing that is noticeable is that we have not heard one student complain, and there's a hundred of them. They're not the type that would keep quiet.

What's more, Friday was the national Teacher's Day, and the students put on a meal for us, gave us a present, and not too offensively did impersonations of us.

In the hands of an amazingly wise God, the global financial crisis can bring about the unimaginable. And since the announcement not one student has gone without food.

Photo: Bit of a shock for 1st years

The silver bonnet and the idiot

2009-05-13T15:09:00.004+01:00

They say before an accident some people's minds go blank. What sticks in my mind was the shiny silver colour of the 4x4's bonnet feet away and still coming. It had appeared from nowhere and I couldn´t get out of its way. One of Fiona Christie´s first impressions of Medellín was that she was more likely to be killed by one of the city´s 250,000 motorbikes than by FARC. At least I was going up-market and being splattered under a 4x4.

There are two basic principles of traffic. Firstly, rules are guidelines only, unless the police are present. Daily I wait at lights that turn red, a green man appears and then I still keep on waiting as buses, lorries and motorbikes become colour blind.

The second thing is that drivers assume pedestrians are idiots who wander on to roads and treat cars as if they're part of some kind of Gameboy competition. One local street trader even pretends he's a matador as he dodges in and out of four lanes of moving traffic.

And so it was that the 4x4 driver applied the idiot's principal and stopped inches away. Admittedly I was crossing while a red man was showing, but this is Colombia. And a friendly wave from a relieved 4x4 driver confirmed that.

Photo - Medellín: a bewildering mix of people and traffic

Kite fliers

2009-05-06T15:04:00.001+01:00

Friday was a holiday and like other city dwellers, we climbed up a hill not far away. There are two hills in the valley which stick up like giant green pimples. When we reached the top we sat on a wall, looked over the city and watched the kite fliers just in front of us.

Kite flying is a seasonal hobby that comes with the winter winds. The kites are home-made using bamboo supports and are up to 3 metres long. One of them flew across the valley and was a distant dot. Others arose vertically towards the flight path of planes approaching the city airport. Another dipped dangerously low and Olwen became most concerned for its well-being but wisely resisted the temptation to get involved.

I just love sitting on a wall and being part of ordinary society. I'd like to think it's an example of incarnational theology, but maybe it's that I'm just too worldly.

Photo: Plane makes it way past the kites

19 in 48 hours

2009-04-29T14:58:00.002+01:00

Not far from the Seminary an evangelical pastor was shot dead 5 years ago. Bullets entered his head, heart and stomach. Last week, as part of a reconciliation process his killer confessed before his widow to the murder. The Judge asked him about the motives for the murder.

The pastor had spoken out against a gang involved in drugs and crime in his area. He had reported their activities to the local Fiscal. What no one knew until the confession was that the order to put the pastor "off the map" came from not from the gang, but from the Fiscal. A widow was left, homeless, with 6 young boys.

Over 48 hours last weekend, 19 people were murdered in Medellín. If you think you have problems, come to Colombia, or Mexico, or Venezuela. And don´t forget that ancient, but reliable, prescription, "You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts you" (Is. 26:3).

Photo: Life's great in Colombia, most of the time

Love your neighbour!

2009-04-22T15:05:00.003+01:00

I left our flat early on Sunday morning and saw a wild looking youth urinating into the Seminary grounds. At a safe distance away the Seminary gardener looked on, worried.

There had been a coming-of-age birthday in the narrow house-filled alleyway next door to the Seminary. Music played all night, such that earplugs, shut windows and a pillow over my head were ineffective in allowing any sleep. The police came twice and decided to corral in the drunks and leave them to it. When the music stopped at 6 am, they fought amongst themselves. A gun was involved at some point.

The Seminary is situated in hardly the best part of the city. It's the kind of area where you need to be street-wise and not walk around with a laptop bag over your shoulder. Thankfully two evangelical churches, the children's library and the sewing room, witness to the gospel. But pray for more conversions.

And pray for our friend in Lima, Donnie Smith, who is to have surgery to remove polyps on Thursday at 8pm UK time.

Photo: Seminary residences to the right, neighbours to the left

Where the duck and priest meet

2009-04-15T15:13:00.001+01:00

One privilege of missionary work is living in a different culture. After a 37 hour journey to get to Colombia, we've just spent 2 days in a hotel restarting our Latino existence. Here a duck nests in the open, feet away from the hotel's main door; long-legged birds dive-bomb Olwen when she walks into their territory and you can hire your own tennis ball-boy for £1.50 an hour.

On Good Friday an open air mass was celebrated in the hotel grounds and 200 of the faithful visited the 14 Stations of the Cross chanting their Our Fathers and Hail Marys.

Missionaries are sometimes accused of destroying native cultures. The duck, long-legged birds and ball-boys needn't worry. But I'm afraid the priest had better watch out. Ancient Rome couldn't halt the message brought by missionaries: there was something supernaturally powerful in it.

This week we start to teach that message. Thanks for your interest, support and love during our furlough. And it's thanks to you we're here again.

Photo: Priest arriving at station 7

What Moody said

2008-12-04T12:49:00.002Z

D.L. Moody once said, "If there had been a committee appointed, Noah’s ark would never have been built". One of the blessings of working in the Seminary is that I'm not on any committees. The worst it gets is the twice a year, end of semester, staff meetings.

Today we finished one of these two-day sessions having worked our way through the marks of the 114 students, and discussed reports concerning finance, admissions, publications, the library, maintenance and so on. Interesting enough, if you stay awake.

The rest of the year was enjoyably spent teaching in some way or other, except when Olwen got hold of me.

We fly to Scotland on Tuesday, and in the New Year will have a 3 month furlough: more committee-free bliss. Thank you Lord.

And thank you for your prayers over the past year. I know it's not easy taking an interest in someone working in a country you've never been to. We are most grateful to God that you've continued with us.

Photo: Vanessa in the Sewing room preparing for Christmas

Leagues good and bad

2008-11-26T22:22:00.002Z

Recently published studies from Brazil make gruesome reading. They provide numerical tables on the young people who die violently. In Scotland it is 2.7 per 100,000 people, but in Colombia the comparable figure is 73.4. This makes Colombia along with El Salvador the world's leaders in violent deaths, five times higher than the USA or Africa. The one consolation is that the Colombian rate has halved over the last 15 years.

It's in this context that the football programme was started. Initially Mark brought the youngsters from the streets into the Seminary to play football and this has finally developed into a 1200 youngster, 5 league tournament. On Saturday we went to watch the final game of the season and the awarding of the championship trophy.

Generous funding comes from Holland (along with orange tops), the USA and TEAR Fund. But the project has been affected by global economics and the shrinking $. The 26 Colombians working on the project haven't been paid since September and $160,000 is needed to finish the first stage of the sports complex.

It's beyond me how anyone can sleep with these kind of burdens. But God is sovereign even in soccer and maybe historians will eventually tell us that the downfall of the US-UK economies was the best thing for missions. Maybe.

Photo: Worried looking Mark (right) with a Colombian colleague. Dutch readers please note the orange tops.

Reprogramming thieves

2008-11-21T22:57:00.002Z

It´s been a busy week: classes finished, graduation is tonight and there's been five celebratory meals and three speaking engagements.

But the start of the week began from a different perspective. We went to see the project which Free Church children are raising funds for. It was one of those strange trips into the fringes of this 2 million population. We were told not to speak English on the bus, to walk quickly when we got off it and not to give anything to anyone. Unfortunately on the bus Christine had trouble switching off her camera flash as she recorded the 45 degree uphill journey. Thankfully she still has it.

In such communities a different civilization exists. The ethic is that you get what you want by begging or stealing. Some locals are so poor that they have never taken the 20p bus ride into the city centre. The church work amongst the children uses a system of encouragments so they learn that honest effort results in rewards.

Later in the week the New Testament class were round for breakfast, and one of the students, more in touch with reality and Jesus than us, prayed that "our fridge would always be full". Lord help me to see life from below.

Photo: Christine sharpens pencils while a NewTestament is being read

Your money or your wife

2008-11-13T00:25:00.003Z

It had to happen sometime with living in Colombia . And it did on Sunday night: being held up at gunpoint. What no one imagined was how it would end.

Early on Sunday evening we were walking along a quiet residential street when a motor bike and two youths drew up beside us. One dismounted, pointed at gun at Olwen and said, "I'm wanting necklaces and gold rings." For the first time ever Olwen was rendered speechless. Her mind went from the awfulness of loosing her wedding ring to being shot. Typically, I hadn´t being paying much attention: it was such a pleasant evening. So I hadn´t see the gun, thought the fellow was wanting to buy such stuff from us, and responded, "I'm very sorry, we don't have anything."

At this the assailant stared at us and then said, "You´re foreigners, aren't you". "Yes" I replied cheerily. He smiled at us, got back on the motorbike and they roared away.

If I'd seen the gun or if he'd seen my wallet and camera, I would be writing a different story. But this is what happened. Thank you Lord.

By the way, Murdo & Christine are getting on so well, we're thinking of hiding their return ticket.

Photo: Bikers everywhere in Medellín: but who are the goodies and who are the badies?

Grace in fried food

2008-11-06T14:05:00.001Z

There is a dark side to the Seminary. Some seem to stumble into the First Year and by the end of it, stumble out, never to return again.

We first met Simmy in the Presbyterian Church where he led the worship. Having come from Pentecostalism he had a simple theology of worship: If it ain't loud enough to annoy the neighbours it ain't pleasing the Lord, and my job is to make sure the Lord is happy. Unfortunately applying this theology worked about as well as Led Zepplin turning up at a Psalmody recital.

He entered the Seminary, and left after a year. As someone who finds holy bruisers intimidating, I was relieved.

We now pass him several times a week at his fried food stand near the Metro. He's so relaxed and happy - even though he's been robbed of his stall and has had to replace it. I can't help but thinking there is more of Christ there for him than in his previous experiences. Not far away I see a man reading the Bible at his stand - he sells lottery tickets. I'll need to work on the theology of that a bit more.

Photo: Deep fried with grace

Richard Claydermann & the Bible

2008-10-29T22:23:00.001Z

Succumbing to pressure I decided to take my return to work on the easy side, and went to some local events.

On Tuesday it was an exhibition of Goya´s etchings showing the hypocrisies in the Spanish Court and Church. It was like investigative journalism and the King eventually had them suppressed. On Thursday I attended the National Stamp Exhibition which included correspondence from Simon Bolívar, South America's independence leader of the 19th century. And on Saturday, along with 1000 others, we attended a concert given by Richard Claydermann, the popular French pianist.

I doubt if in Glasgow I could enjoy so much in one week. Thanks to the Spanish conquest, European culture is important here.

But reality came when I received an email from a man thanking me for the theological resources web site and explaining why a recent entry had been important. It was one of the Spanish Bible in audio format: the man couldn't read.

Latin America consists of the rich and cultured, and the poor and semi-literate. I can guess who there'll be most of in heaven.

Photo: "Sleep of reason produces monsters", Goya's comment on life

Three life preservers

2008-10-22T23:33:00.001+01:00

We've had a relaxing weekend in the quiet city of Santa Fe. It gave me time to process my recent illness, and I concluded three things:

Mind over matter is the best of practices. Neurotic souls will appreciate the pressure I was under when my head was clamped in an old MRI machine, the nurse said "you mustn't open your eyes" and gave me a large emergency button. Lying in the tube I felt my body was tipping backwards, then there was the deafening start-stop noise of pneumatic drills. Slowly I counted to 400. When I came out I anticipated the nurse's congratulations. "Watch your step" she said.

Faith is the greatest asset. The ambulance, apparently devoid of springs, bumped me all the way to the clinic. It matched the way questions hit me. Would my life be for ever marred? Was my overseas work over? I remembered the paragliding, and my simple confidence in the youthful instructor and the flimsy plastic seat. The Lord is somewhat more trustworthy.

Hope keeps you going. Being woken up for surprise injections at 4 am and shunted around in a wheel chair, makes you want to shout: No more. The Odyssey was an encouragement never to entertain despair. But in the Word I found even more reason to hope than Homer could ever have thought.

I started back to work on Tuesday.

Photo: City centre, Santa Fe, and a good place to reflect

Needles, sewing and otherwise

2008-10-16T00:54:00.002+01:00

Within 15 minutes of being taken ill there was a doctor, a nurse and a gas man in the flat, plus an ambulance parked in the street. The gas man carried an oxygen cylinder.

Things fell apart a bit when they tried to get me into a hospital because no one wanted me - we had no insurance. Eventually a non-profit making clinic in a dubious part of the city took the risk thanks to Manuel making the Seminary go as security. The Seminary must be pretty solid because they gave me my own room with balcony, sofa and cable TV.

Olwen had to sign to say she would stay with me 24 hours a day. Most of her time was spent sitting on the bed knitting, Matt watched the football. I buried myself in stories of Greek heroes while exercising. There was some confusion as to who was the patient.

Thankfully the Board paid for me to see a specialist who diagnosed the previous week's 7 hour cramped bus journey to Armenia as clot inducing. I now must take jags before and after such trips.

Things are back to normal: no cable TV, Matt's in Scotland, Olwen and the newly arrived Murdo & Christine Morrison (Kinloch, Lewis) are revamping the sewing room and I'm desperate to get back into the real world of the ancient Bible.

Photo: View from the hospital balcony at night: the Metro train flies past a 19th century church

Strange and stranger

2008-10-08T03:03:00.001+01:00

Two notable things happened while on holiday in Armenia last week. One was going paragliding. What was strange was how easy it all was, a short run to start with, a short run at the end, and the rest was just sitting in a seat. The scary bit was riding in the constantly breaking down jeep that took us up to the top of a militarized mountain, and then there was the speedy motor bike journey afterwards to find where Olwen and Matt had landed.

The other thing was Matt losing his wallet on the bus. We had no idea which bus of the many on the road we had been on, nor how to track it down quickly. The amazing thing was that he got it back complete with money and bank cards. This was thanks to a couple of kindly bus drivers slightly rejigging their routes for us.

Of course, if you were the Health & Safety type such a holiday would be a nightmare. But for Latinos that kind of thinking is a bit strange. Either way the divine presence must be a reality.

Aghhhh... the above was written a week ago and just before sending it I had a mild stroke. This meant hospital for four days. Life seems like a Christian version of the Odyssey and I feel like a Ulysses washed out to sea. Thankfully Jesus is stronger and kinder than Neptune, so am home now and perfectly well.

Photo: Setting out at 10,000 ft. - don't look down, don't look down,
don't look down, don't ...

Colombia's earthquake centre

2008-09-24T16:36:00.001+01:00

Travel across the Andes is curvy, bumpy and unpredictable, and it took us 7 hours to reach Colombia's most at risk earthquake zone. During the mid-semester break we're staying for a week near the city of Armenia. Almost 10 years ago over a thousand were killed, 200,000 made homeless and the city destroyed. The overlapping geological plates in this area cause significant quakes to occur every 20 years.

But there are other strange statistics. After the last one almost 4000 people disappeared, not dead, but looters carrying off their new TV set or loo. And when international aid arrived there was an immigration into the area from as far away as Bogotá by those seizing the opportunity for a better home paid for by relief agencies. Today the city is full of betting shops and casinos.

Such is the perversity of human nature, so perverse that it murdered the world's saviour. Thankfully there are those telling their fellow Armenians about long-suffering divine goodness.

Photo: Main square, Armenia, last Sunday - International Peace Day.

Glorious food

2008-09-17T15:10:00.002+01:00

Last Friday was the Seminary's biggest social event of the year, "Colonies Night". The 7 different regions represented in the Seminary each had a display stand with typical foods from their area and during the evening everyone presented an artistic event. These were dances, dramas, poetry or songs.

For the first time ever there was a Scottish stand, covered in tartan, and heart-attack favouring trifle and buns. We served British tea which in typical Scottish tradition was Té Hindu, and made in Colombia. And if that didn't test cardiovascular systems sufficiently, Fiona taught them Strip the Willow. The trifle and buns won second prize for food.

It was a fun night and probably helps for good relationships amongst the 150 staff and students more than anything else. It's not surprising that much of Jesus' ministry was carried out when eating food.

Photo: Young and old at the Colonies Night

Kicking the ball and others

2008-09-10T13:45:00.002+01:00

On Friday there was nearly a fight. And then there was a fight. It was during the Seminary's soccer competition and to do with a girl. Thankfully those who swopped over to boxing/wrestling didn't actually belong to the Seminary.

And the same weekend we were inundated with widows. Sixty of them are coming over the next three weekends for a conference. Most of them are quite young; bereaved because of Colombia's violence.

During the week also a group calling themselves the Charlotte Eagles arrived for a 10 day stay. They're a team of North American pro soccer players. Matt knowlingly tells me that those coming from the USA are rubbish at the game. But more importantly they're Christians and testify to the crowd at half-time.

I dodge in and out of all this excitement quietly, but note the hurried step and worried faces of the Seminary's maintence staff.

Photo: The Eagles opening match: they had trouble getting off the ground but won in the end