My life

The house

2009-11-22T03:05:00.001-08:00

When I stop and think: 250 (Rent) 30 (Gas and Electric) *Estimates* 15 (Virgin Media) 34 (Transports) Total spend= 329 per month Now compare that with: 297.13 (Halls rent) *Smacked* Regrets? Not really. This house is HAUNTED. Well to be more exact, the house next to us is Haunted. I can hear footsteps now and then from my room. Lately I have this feeling that someone or something is

Back

2009-10-16T03:16:00.001-07:00

It’s been a while since the last time I wrote something on this blog. My current address is: 134 Hubert Road Selly oak Birmingham, B29 6ER The house is not bad. Very comfortable. Come visit if you have the time to do so.

Be afraid

2009-09-20T06:35:00.001-07:00

Gah. Demons and Devils are out after a month of imprisonment. Have you ever wish something so bad that you keep thinking about it every single second since you first wish it? I need to let go. So that’s the end of Ramadan for 1430 Hijrah. Next week I am going back to UK. Sigh. It is so confusing. A part of me is excited, another part of me is not that excited. There are times when I wish the

Condolences

2009-09-16T21:27:00.001-07:00

Death comes swiftly uninvited. It makes you think how precious this life can be. It is too precious to get mad over silly things. It it too beautiful to taint it with negative emotions. Today, a friend of a friend was summon to meet her creator. Most of my friends are a friend of hers, 57 people to be exact. It pains me to know of her passing, but I am sure it pains even more for those who are

Rethink

2009-09-16T08:44:00.001-07:00

God, I need to rethink about everything. Yes. EVERYTHING! I don’t know which topics to choose now: 1. Trouble teenagers: Understanding the underlying psychological problem of rebels. 2. Positive attitude in sports: How it affects expectation and actual performance. 3. Mind over matter: A myth or science? 4. Love, does it contribute towards authentic happiness? 5. Homosexuality, is it

In desperation you

2009-09-12T20:03:00.001-07:00

Did the most stupidest thing. Everyone does it. No exception. It scares me that I don’t feel any guilt about it. Not a tiny bit. The consequences are dire but one that I really want to happen. Is this what they term ‘bad’ intention? How can it be bad when I am not the one who started this rollercoaster? Is this a revenge on my side? How low can I fall? 2 weeks left before I’m going back to UK.

I don’t wanna wake up

2009-09-11T20:50:00.001-07:00

They say dream in the morning is a message from God. I had the most wonderful dream. The one dream I don’t want to leave. If I have a choice between the dream and this reality, I will with absolute certainty choose the former. What’s the dream about? To share or not to share, a choice that is not hard to make. I decide not to write down the details but I can tell you that it is a sign that I’ve

This is Fate?

2009-09-11T07:40:00.001-07:00

“Be close to him for he needs a young successor to continue what he is doing right now” Can I live up to that expectation? There is a certain dark, evil presence inside my heart: A sinner. Can he see that presence? If he can, can he bring light again into my heart? This is the phase of my life so far in a nutshell: Muslim => Muslim/Newage => Hardcore Muslim => Muslim => A guy who believe in

Hello Orang hitam

2009-09-07T18:45:00.001-07:00

Bought a 19.00 dollar emulsion from skin food at Hua Ho Bunut and was given a packet of black sugar mask. I don’t bring enough cash (not having any intention of withdrawing cash from a nearby atm machine either), so end up with just emulsion. It is my new moisturizer. XD I feel so awesomely fresh after that. I am going to stock lots of that small packet before going back to UK. The item I

Kind

2009-09-06T21:53:00.001-07:00

I don’t trust religious zealot. Wait…I trust only few but most of them I don’t trust. They are mean and evil. They say one thing but do the other. For instance, they advocate ‘we are loving’ but they pass caning judgment on a woman who drank an alcohol. Reason “To prevent others from following such behavior”. Are you fucking retarded? That method doesn’t work anymore. For God sake, does history

Fuck off

2009-09-04T14:12:00.001-07:00

1. I don’t give a damn about what people think of me. They don’t bring food to my table. I wear what I want. 2. “You are not yet successful.” Bloody hell. And here I am hearing praises about how someone (friend’s son, stories from stories, etc) is successful when he goes to University. I am in my final year and I am not successful in your eyes? I don’t understand you father. I am not here to

Accommodation

2009-08-26T20:34:00.001-07:00

I have not decide where to stay this coming September. I did mentioned about living in city centre however since coming back to Brunei, I have a change of heart. Why? 1. Because of you. Yes. I want you to attend my graduation. Kapeesh? 2. I want to travel. And travelling requires money. And living in city centre does not come cheap. The cheapest you can hope to get is 350 quids exclusive of

Holding on

2009-08-25T20:41:00.001-07:00

Keep holding on. Just stay strong. Yes, I am strong. At times. I was laughing looking through the photographs. I know loving you is not a mistake at all. In fact I am absolutely sure that it is the best decision I ever made since I began to involve myself with love. I really love this quote from the movie Captain Corelli's Mandolin: "Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake

Simple Hair do

2009-08-24T19:11:00.001-07:00

After drying my hair with the hair dryer~ With a touch of Gatsby Wax. Simple kan? And the Contact Lenses~ I’m using my brother’s O2 phone atm (at the moment). <= Insider joke. huhu. My first luxury mobile phone after 2 years of using simple phone. I think it’s luxurious because it acts like a small computer. XD I declare I am a bimbo phone user. The blondes look smarter

I like me now

2009-08-24T02:43:00.001-07:00

Serious. I look more….mature. haha. Self proclaimed. Did few stuffs today: 1. Passport photo. Senyum. I smiled. I think it was my sarcasm smile although it turned out well on paper. (Beware emo is coming) I believe this smile is still yours to keep. I see signs here and there, and I believe it will happen….whatever that thing that will happen that is. Everything I do I do it for you. Well

Children

2009-08-22T20:58:00.001-07:00

You can’t live without them. They are very interesting. Little devil I called them. They are honest. Everything they say is truth even if they lie, their body would give away. Their curious mind know no boundaries. They know nothing about off-limit. If children are let loose in environment where its danger is far as the distance between the moon and earth, geniuses would will be grown. The

A kindle of Piousness

2009-08-21T05:52:00.001-07:00

Perhaps there is a hope for tomorrow. A hope to find the siratul Mustaqim. The desire to go to Sharif Ali mosque is strong. I was almost at tears when I pass through the Sharif Ali mosque: I didn’t go for the first Tarawih. There are always reasons for not going for Tarawih every year. From rain to downright lazy. I need saving, salvation from whatever cursed chain that binds me from seeking

Waiting

2009-08-20T08:11:00.001-07:00

Yes I will wait for you till you are ready again. They say being ignored is a sign of not wanting. I disagree. I believe you have your own reasons; and I trust those reasons. As long as you don’t cheat on me and I will be forever faithful to you. (I do believe you still love me because my heart tells me that you are.) Be positive love. I will always put you in my prayer. That is a promise that

Ben 10 Return

2009-08-19T19:36:00.001-07:00

Watching it. I am a kid at heart. I don’t give a shit if Ben is for kid. Gwen drawn pretty hawt. Who wants to be normal when I can be awesome. I changed so much. So much that old Lisyah will cry his heart out if he realized how the him now is so much different than the him he was before. Even my parent notice the changes that took place within me. I am so open. I am too open. That scares

Lost

2009-08-19T07:39:00.001-07:00

I am lost in sea of thoughts. My visions resurface. Absence make the heart grow fonder. Is it? Does your heart counts? Believe. Yakin. One thing that I lack these days. I need to start my meditation. I have to speak to the person that resides within me. I begin to understand. With understanding come passion. I want to try shrimp stix. Can anyone teach me squash? I pay 10 dollar Brunei

Death

2009-08-18T09:29:00.001-07:00

I pray that her soul is blessed in the afterlife. Although you are not my grandma by blood, you are a grandma nonetheless. I am sorry Uncle Pet for not expressing my condolences for I am speechless for your lost. Death comes to us without asking. It just happened. What if I die tomorrow without you knowing? I don’t want to disappear. We learned from mistakes. Falling in love with you is

Guitar

2009-08-17T18:26:00.001-07:00

My brother is good at it. I am learning practicing it. It couldn’t be that hard. I hope. Hope, the word that makes us fickle. I wonder if we can live without this thing call hope. Hope for the best. Hope for the future. I wish everyone have the mind of pro-darwinism: to think in term of biology, where everything can be deduced to something explainable. Blegh. Babbling Lisyah. Grandma… I saw a

Silence

2009-08-15T22:07:00.001-07:00

I don’t understand why. Why would you do this to me? Have not I ask you if you want this to continue? Have not I ask you if this is the path that you want to take? I am willing to do anything. I am willing to endure this silence. I will never cut you off. I still believe in you. Silence doesn’t solve anything! Nor ignoring me. You need me, and I need you. If it takes 1 year, 2 years, or 50

This song

2009-08-15T02:49:00.001-07:00

Lyrics | Avril Lavigne Lyrics | Fall To Pieces Lyrics

Emotional

2009-08-14T18:00:00.001-07:00

It is amazing how I manage to experience the turbulence of love within a week. From jealousy to downright insecurity. I am at wrong. I am sorry. You know I only have few weeks left with you, I want to make use of it. Perhaps I fail to understand you, No I failed to understand you. That is why grandma insist I consider your feelings for a change. You are the world to me. You put your blog on