My American Meltingpot

Novel Excuse

2009-12-14T17:06:00.000-08:00

Meltingpot Readers,

Please excuse me for not posting a fascinating and informative piece today. Alas, the manuscript for my debut novel, Substitute Me, was due in my editor's hot little hands today, so the Meltingpot slipped my mind. (oops) I apologize.

Please tune in Wednesday for our regular scheduled programming.

Peace!

Homa Sabet Tavangar Answers Your Questions about Raising Global Citizens

2009-12-11T10:50:00.000-08:00

You asked and Homa Sabet Tavangar has taken the time give us some really great answers and information about how we can "raise our children to be at home in the world." That's the tag line on her book, Growing Up Global. So without further ado, enjoy the questions and answers and you'll find out who wins a copy of the book at the end. Keep checking Homa's website Growing Up Global.net for even more ideas and news about the book.

Peace!

******************************************

Homa writes:

Before I answer the (great!) questions you sent, I wanted to thank Lori and her readers. My American Melting Pot, like Growing Up Global, is all about blurring the lines that divide us and living out authentic connections. And the community that’s grown around the blog has potential to learn from and support each other. This is so refreshing!

Nora asked...

I'm myself an "international citizen" grown up in both north Africa and north Europe (Scandinavia) and have always felt torn between two very different cultures and I would want some day that my kids live in an international environment but I wouldn't want them to feel like they don't belong in either places like I do sometimes. How can one avoid that?

Homa Satbet Tavangar (HST): I think you’re describing a reality millions have felt, split between multiple cultures. This is the situation described and addressed in the book Third Culture Kids, by Ruth Van Reken and David Pollock. It’s generated a movement of people who feel like what you’re describing. For your kids I think a few things can be done: first, talk about all of these feelings and the fact you have navigated and they will navigate so many different cultures – but they’re not alone. You can show “heroes” that have done the same, like Barack Obama, a soccer star (sorry – I can’t say Tiger Woods anymore), or someone you know personally. You can celebrate the merging of your cultures. Is there a favorite Scandinavian dish alongside a North African food you love? Even pointing out how rich this makes your life (on a regular basis) is worthwhile. Metaphors demonstrating your multi-cultural richness can help: I always remember how bored I’d be if my box of crayons only contained white ones. I love magenta, gold, aquamarine, sienna… In a way, isn’t that like the cultural experience your family is having? This mix of cultures is much more ordinary than a few generations ago, so this also helps our kids adjust to the “new normal” – they’re not alone! Finally, I hope that your care about their feeling torn between cultures won’t hold you back from living abroad or experiencing many cultures. The benefits far outweigh the challenges!

Anonymous (Wendy) asked...
How do you deal with other´s who only see you as the country you come from and not you?

I always feel drawn into debates about how the United States does things from war, food, culture, etc. I often have a hard time dealing with the arrogant behavior of others who are pointing out "American" arrogance. I have been in an international student, traveled A LOT and have now hosted an international student.

I tend to avoid these discussions whenever possible. But with being the host, it has been much more difficult. A simple explanation of how something works here (when asked) turns into a debate. Can´t we exchange ideas without judging?

HST: I certainly hope we can exchange ideas without judging – and as I’ve noticed, some people around me seem to be better at that than others, sort of like a muscle they’ve developed for having honest, non-judgmental, exploratory conversations. Maybe they were raised this way, in a more open-minded, diverse environment. Growing up, I dealt a lot with others’ judgment of me for my country of origin. I was in junior high in the Midwest when the Iranian Revolution happened and suddenly it was as if my own family had taken the hostages and burned American flags (I describe this in more detail in Growing Up Global). My name was always a dead give-away and point of curiosity. Some people approached it painfully – squinting, contorting their mouth trying to pronounce, immediately wanting to know where the name/I was from. With all the negativity, it was hard to admit I was Iranian. Ways to deal with this: look at the points of pride from your culture. When people point out stereotypes then (especially as you get older) you have an identity of the beauty, joy and strength of your culture and are less vulnerable to the misconceptions. It’s nice to have friends from your own background to help validate your identity, though that’s often not possible. Parents might want to try to arrange social occasions with families of similar background or philosophy – surround yourself in acceptance.

You’re also pointing out the flip side: defending Americans from stereotypes abroad. One common element to both sides is that we are not our governments. We don’t have to feel like we must defend our government’s decisions – we didn’t make ‘em. Reaching out to show your human side while overseas, not feeling like you need to represent your entire people, can be liberating, fun, educational for both sides.

Allyson asked...

I love Wendy's question and look forward to hearing Homa's answer. When visiting Nigeria, I often find myself deconstructing generalizations about the U.S. and Americans.

My questions are more out of curiosity (having missed Homa's blog-sorry): How did your children, particularly your "tween" adjust to the Gambia? Did they view it as an adventure? Did they have food issues??

HST: I probably viewed our life in the Gambia as an adventure more than my kids did. A great thing about our time there was the fact that we arrived on a Friday and school started on Monday. This meant that my tweens (2 of ‘em!) were able to dive in to a routine, meet peers and not have too much time to think about home, friends, other things they missed. I realize this may not be “PC” these days, but the structure was terrific for us. We also were very busy with our service in the neighborhood school, though, particularly for my younger daughter, this was trying. It was her first experience with overt injustice, even abuse (witnessing it on other kids). Here is a blog entry touching on that. The second week our 3.5 year old started pre-school. It was truly adorable and this became another thing for us to enjoy – sort of entertainment for the older ones in the family. Speaking of entertainment: watching satellite TV was taken to the level of a sport. After school kids would come home and have their big meal of the day while American Idol was shown on Dubai satellite TV broadcast there. This was considered the ultimate cool.

The Gambian food was great – we were very fortunate. On top of that, thanks to positive peer pressure (cousins who grew up there and new friends) they liked the food – especially “domoda” and “benichin”! Rice is the dominant staple, so they didn’t have to adjust to the foo-foo/ugali staple found in other African regions. My kids have been raised to eat pretty adventurously. I also talk about this in Growing Up Global: how to get your kids to eat new foods.

Amy asked...

Preparing my children to be global citizens, I feel is one of the most important jobs I have as a parent in today's society. While having the opportunity to live in a foreign country, my children attend the local public school there. I am very thankful for this. We have now moved back to the states and I am always searching for ways to continue their global education. I am very interested in this book.

HST: Thanks so much for this note. A big reason I wrote Growing Up Global is that I too was searching for ways to instill a global mindset, global education and knew that foreign travel and living was not always in reach. I hope it will provide useful ideas for your family – it’s meant to serve as a toolkit, with ready-to-implement ideas.

Also, I hope you will check if your local public library carries it. Given tight budgets, libraries will more likely purchase new books if their patrons ask for it.

C asked...

I am not an "international citizen", nor is my son. We are both home town people, and probably will always b, aside from traveling. Do you believe it is possible to raise my son with a more global perspective with out moving?

HST: Absolutely! Just by starting conversations at the dinner table, having a map or globe handy, listening to music from around the world, trying new foods, watching films from other countries, reaching out to diverse friends in your community, and more (ideas in the book!) you will create a powerful example for your son that the world is within reach, and it’s something to be excited about, feel connected with. I’ve spoken with so many adults who were raised in the U.S. by parents who valued world cultures, had diverse friends, and engaged in stimulating, sincere conversations. They never doubted they were “world citizens,” though on the surface it might not have looked like it. Your example and interests are powerful, and today we really are more connected than ever.

Mashiara asked...

What are some things that your children had to get use to regarding climate, culture, and any other tidbits growing up in another part of the world that wasn't so mainstream?

HST: So many things, but here are a few:

o Because of extreme poverty everywhere, class differences were stark, while they weren’t so aware of them in the US.
o Climate: We stayed there during dry season, and at the tail end of the “harmatan” where sand/wind storms reminded us of the desert’s encroaching on fertile lands. This was a tangible example of climate change we’d not experienced.
o A bit of chaos: no line for school snacks – a free for all, from my kids’ perspective; livestock roaming the streets, including major roads; open-air markets, bargaining, lack of punctuality.
o The fact that we weren’t African attracted much attention from anyone passing us on the road. Young men continuously approached any of us, trying to start a conversation, sometimes closing in (very close) to our personal space – very uncomfortable.
o Islam was ubiquitous. We were woken by morning call to prayer, schools and offices let out by noon Friday for prayers, and 98% of the nation is Muslim.
o Polygamy was so common that my 3.5 year old played dolls where they would be the first wife and second wife (!).

The Golden Papaya asked...

I'm raising three little "global citizens" here in Brazil. My question is, how did class play into your international living experience? How did this experience change your perspectives on class? My children are enrolled (as scholarship students) at a fancy international school, and it is interesting to me how the intricacies of class play out, and what our sons may be learning about this.

HST: As I mentioned with the previous question, class issues became starkly apparent while we were there. One of the dangers of living in a “poor” country is that kids, even from middle class families in the US, may easily gain a broader sense of entitlement living there, as they commonly would have servants and their lifestyle is clearly in a highly privileged category, even if you try for it not to be. I was happy that things weren’t “black and white” so to speak. Unlike my experience living in Latin America, there was no assumption of class privilege that went with skin tone (i.e., lighter = elite). At the same time, the poor were mind-bogglingly poor. When we hear about those who live on less than $1 per day, from UN statistics, it’s these people. A vital lesson we learned, however, from some of the poorest people we met: they lived in compounds and took care of each other. So, no one went hungry and somehow they made ends meet. The ultimate show of poverty in their society is to be alone – then no one can help you.

Wow! Thanks Homa. And the lucky winner of a copy of this wonderful book, Growing Up Global is Amy!!! Amy, please send an email with a name and address to myamericanmeltingpot@gmail.com and you'll get a copy of the book, just in time for the holidays.

More Obama Relatives in the News

2009-12-09T11:22:00.000-08:00

First Obama's half brother, Mark Ndesandjo, enters the world stage after living a quiet life in China, to announce the publication of his semi-autobiographical novel Nairobi to Shenzhen. And now it has been revealed that Obama's aunt (his father's half sister) is living in the United States as an illegal immigrant pending deportation.

Like Ndesandjo, Obama's aunt, Zeituni Onyango reportedly is expecting no special treatment because she is related to the President of the United States. In fact, she told the Associated Press, "I carry my own cross. [Barack] has nothing to do with my problem."

You can read Onyango's complete story on The Grio and decide for yourself if you think she's going to get special treatment or if she deserves it. I think whether she deserves it or not, who wants to be the immigration official who deports the president's auntie?

In some ways, I don't think it is realistic or even possible to try to be completely objective when dealing with issues of celebrities or public figures. If someone is related to a super star, it is almost human nature to want see if their superstar qualities flow through the DNA of the rest of the family. Inquiring minds just want to know. And that's not always a bad thing. For example, Obama's mother's 1992 anthropological dissertation has just been released by Duke University Press as the book, Surviving Against the Odds: Village Industry in Indonesia. It's a totally academic tome, yet the author's connection as Obama's mama is slapped on the front of the book. You can read more about the book here.

So, considering Obama has a handful of other half-siblings and relatives around the world I don't suspect this is the last family skeleton to fall from the closest. I just hope the American public and media don't get too caught up in the hype. What do you think?

Peace!

It's not Friday, but I Still Have Questions...

2009-12-07T11:31:00.000-08:00

Meltingpot readers, I hope you believe me when I say that I really, really, appreciate your comments and thought-provoking responses to my writing here. You all make me think and reconsider many of my opinions and you often open my eyes to fascinating new information. So thank you for that. And now perhaps you can help me with some more burning questions.

1. Did anyone else besides me watch way too many newsweekly specials this weekend about the guilty verdict handed down to American college student Amanda Knox --the poor girl rotting in an Italian prison accused of viciously murdering her British roommate? And then afterwards worry that Amanda Knox is being convicted for being an American stereotype? Seriously, the fact that she kept a sloppy house and liked to have sex and smoke pot seemed to be enough to convict her of murder. I know when I was a college student in Spain, all of the boys wanted to come play in my yard because they knew American girls were easy. And Black American girls? That was like hitting the Jackpot! So at the end, my question really isn't is Amanda Knox guilty or innocent, because that hot mess of a crime seems to be crawling with inconsistencies, but rather is the stereotype of the Ugly American still so strong overseas that if we're not careful, could do us real harm?

2. Is it just me or has anyone else noticed that the big billboard movie posters for Clint Eastwood's new flick Invictus feature a full-frontal shot of Matt Damon, but Morgan Freeman, who plays Nelson Freaking Mandela, is in dark profile behind him? Why is that? The movie is about Nelson Mandela (I checked on IMDB) and yet Matt Damon's no-name rugby player is the main attraction on the movie posters. Really? Even Nelson Mandela can't get White people to go to the movies?

3. And speaking of White people at the movies. Obviously a lot of White, Black and other people are enjoying Sandra Bullock's new film, The Blindside. It's the number one movie in the land right now. And I ask you, why do you think that is? A lot of folks have grumbled that it's just one more stereotypical film of rich White people helping the poor Black (overweight) innocent. I haven't seen the film so I don't really have an opinion but I'm curious what you all think? It is a true story and Sandra Bullock is delightful with that fake southern accent and gosh, it's the holiday season when all we can think of is goodwill towards men. So is it okay to like this movie?

4. Am I the last meltingpot maven to hear about the Mr. Hyphen contest, sponsored by Hyphen magazine. In his story for the AP about the contest, Jesse Washington describes the event as, " a faux pageant in the San Francisco Bay area aimed at redefining the image of Asian-American men beyond nerdy, sexless stereotypes." But it's not really "faux." The talent is real, the judges are real and there's a big check for the winner. Is this the way we break out of stereotypes? Can you think of some other pageants we might want to create?

Okay, those are all of my questions for now. I'll be waiting for your answers.

Peace!

Growing Up Global: Homa Sabet Tavangar Will Now Take Your Questions (And a Giveaway Too)

2009-12-04T10:33:00.000-08:00

When I first met Homa Sabet Tavangar, I had just moved to Philadelphia. Homa was about to leave the city. Temporarily. She said she was about to take her three young daughters and move to Africa, to The Gambia specifically. Why? Because she wanted them to experience the "oneness of humanity."

Soon after, Homa left the United States with her girls in tow, to live out her principles. Her oldest daughter should have been in her last year of middle school, her youngest was only three-and-a-half. Once there, Homa did not search out an expat community or try to find an exclusive private international school for her girls. She enrolled them all in private local schools with some of the same families they were living amongst as well as some other international kids. She chronicled her journey in a fantastic blog for the Philadelphia Inquirer.

Personally, I loved reading about her adventures on the blog, but Homa's gone one better. She's written a fascinating and useful book called, Growing Up Global: Raising Children to be at Home in the World. In the book she talks about her motivations to take the trip to Africa but the majority of the tome is a parenting primer, offering wonderful tips and activities to raise real global citizens. With chapter titles like "Be A Friend," "Go to School" and "Celebrate with the World," the book is chock full of ways (from learning a new language to attending an international children's film festival) to make our children (and ourselves too!) understand their place in this big wide world. I love it! And one of you will too.

Homa has given me a copy of Growing Up Global to give to one of my Meltingpot Readers. AND she's offered to answer any of your questions about raising a global citizen. So post a question here for Homa in the comments section and you'll be entered to win the book. We'll post the winner and answers from Homa next Friday so get your questions in by Monday at midnight.

For more information about Homa and her own fascinating background, check out her beautiful Growing Up Global website.

Peace!

Does the World's Most Famous Cablasian Owe Us an Explanation?

2009-12-02T08:58:00.000-08:00

Of course there are way more important things to worry about. Like the 30 thousand new troops who are heading to Afghanistan or the upcoming conference on climate change. But I can't help but spend a little moment of my day wondering what is going on with Tiger Woods. I know it's really none of my business why he crashed his car into a fire hydrant in the wee hours of the morning and why his wife needed a golf club to bust out the back window and drag him to safety (like why couldn't he just back up?) but since everybody else is talking about it, I'm intrigued.

I mean, maybe he was just running out for diapers or formula or a container of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream. Because who doesn't every once in a while get a craving? But if that were the case, wouldn't you just say that? Why all the secrecy? Didn't Tiger learn anything from David Letterman's recent PR nightmare that it's best to just lay all of your bad deeds out on the table before anyone else can expose you?

Well, apparently the message is finally sinking in, because Tiger has just issued a statement on his website asking the public to respect his privacy. The statement begins:

" I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart. I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves. I am not without faults and I am far short of perfect. I am dealing with my behavior and personal failings behind closed doors with my family. Those feelings should be shared by us alone."

So it sounds like Tiger may have strayed from the family nest. He certainly wouldn't be the first man to do so, but it does sting when it's one of our so-called sports heroes, especially one who seems to pride himself on staying out of the limelight for anything besides golf.

So what do you think? Does Tiger Woods owe the public any explanation? Is there a middle ground where he doesn't have to give us all of the sordid details, but instead he just tells us (or Oprah perhaps) what happened and that he and his wife are working on it and now please leave us alone? Didn't Kobe Bryant and his wife do that? And finally, do you think there will be any additional scrutiny to this case because Tiger's wife is White?

So many questions? Do you have any answers or opinions?

I'm listening.

Peace.

And the Winner is...

2009-11-30T11:20:00.000-08:00

Hello Meltingpot Readers,

Sorry for falling off the face of the blogosphere. Between Thanksgiving preparations and working on the final edits of my novel (which is due in two weeks) the Meltingpot got left behind. I apologize profusely. But let's not dwell on the past. Instead, let's talk about the winner of my Kinky Gazpacho Giveaway.

Ms. E. You won! So please send us an email at myamericanmeltingpot@gmail.com with a mailing address and we will send you a copy of Kinky Gazpacho, the book and the t-shirt from ?RU.

And speaking of giveaways...I'm in a giving mood this season and have some wonderful books to give away that would make wonderful gifts. We're talking memoirs, how-tos and spirituality focused tomes. Books that are guaranteed to make you feel good after reading.

So please stay-tuned to the Meltingpot. Thanks!

Peace!

The Secret Life of Obama's Brother

2009-11-23T11:52:00.000-08:00

Am I the last Obama fan to know that our president has a biracial (Jewish and Kenyan) half brother, Mark Ndesandjo, who lives in China and is married to a Chinese woman?

I mean I've read his memoir. I've read all the Obama children's books. I even keep my own Obama scrapbook and yet when I caught the brief headline in Time magazine last week, that Obama stopped by to visit his half-brother in China during his official Asia trip, I did a double take.

Now, I'm generally not a pessimist, but doesn't it just seem like every president has to have a creepy and/or slightly embarrassing brother hiding in a closet, just waiting for the right time to expose his creepy and/or embarrassing habits on the public stage? I'm not saying this is true about Obama's brother, at all. I'm just saying I wouldn't be surprised if a little something scandalous doesn't come out soon.

Right now the media seems to be respecting his privacy. The fact that he lives in a small province in China probably makes it easier for him to lay low, although now that he has his own new self-published, semi-autobiographical novel to promote, he may want a little bit more publicity. Can I just ask, why can't presidential siblings just have really normal jobs and boring lives that nobody would care about?

I'm not going to judge, but as Dick Cheney might say, I'm staying on high alert. What do you think? Will we hear more from and about Mark Ndesandjo? Good stuff or bad stuff? Here's some basic information about him from the Associated Press.

Peace.

PS. You still have a few more hours to post your entry in Friday's comments for a chance to win a book and a t-shirt.

Finding Myself in the Music (And a Giveaway Too)

2009-11-20T18:25:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Ieishah over at Fat Juicy Oyster, I can't get this new song, Looking for Paradise, by Alicia Keys and Spanish crooner, Alejandro Sanz, out of my head.

Now, Ieishah thought the song was horrible. I believe the words she used were "cheesy con queso." But somehow it's growing on me. And it's not because of the lyrics (they are cheesy con queso). It's got a catchy little refrain, yes, but more importantly, it's a kinky gazpacho duet that reminds me of me. Am I saying that Alicia is my sister-twin and Alejandro Sanz is a dead ringer for el esposo? No, I'm not that ridiculous. I just love to see Black and Spanish paired up together making beautiful (albeit a little cheesy) music together. It feels like a reflection of my reality.

So Meltingpot readers, do you do the same thing? Do you find yourself in music? Tell me what song speaks to your life story and you'll be entered in a drawing to receive an autographed copy of my life story, Kinky Gazpacho and a Kinky Gazpacho t-shirt from whatrugear.com. All entries must be received by Monday, November 23rd at midnight.

Peace.

Oh, and here's the song Looking for Paradise by Alicia Keys and Alejandro Sanz. Do you think it's cheesy?

How Do You Translate "Black?"

2009-11-18T09:07:00.000-08:00

Am I the only one who missed this disturbing news about the international advertising campaign for the movie Couples Retreat? Personally, I hardly paid attention to this film when it premiered in the United States because Vince Vaughn is in it and quite frankly, I think Vaughn possesses the dramatic range of a yodeling pickle. But I digress.

Apparently, the movie posters for the film in the UK and other foreign markets had the Black couple removed -- both their photographs and their names in the list of credits -- because, well, because apparently Black people just don't appeal to foreigners. Here's how a Universal spokesperson explained their decision to whitewash the poster: We got rid of the Black actors to “ simplify the poster to actors who are most recognizable in international markets.” Oh, And they "regretted causing offense."

For a full read on the incident,and a peek at the before-and-after posters, you can check out this Yahoo story.

Many people in La La Land, aka Hollywood, believe that Black people just don't translate well overseas. That Will Smith just isn't that popular and so we can't put him on magazine covers or on movie posters and expect our British brothers and sisters to buy. And God forbid can you imagine in Japan or China or Turkey? Or at least that's what top brass at the movie companies are saying. But maybe they're saying that because they personally think that and don't have any Black people in positions of power at the studio to tell them otherwise. That's kind of what this writer at the LA Times says in his article about this whole hulabaloo.

What do you think? Especially you world travelers. Would foreign audiences shun a movie with a Black protagonist or supporting actor? Could they handle Black people on their movie posters? Vivienne Pattison, director of Media Watch UK, told the [Daily]Mail: "... We celebrate diversity in Britain and we could have coped with seeing the same poster used in America." Indeed, I find it really hard to believe that considering foreign markets are so hot for Black music, style, fashion, slang, dance, food (yes, my cousin is about to take a job teaching Italian chefs how to make soul food in Italy.), and our hot Black president, that somehow they would be turned off by Black people in a movie. What is the real problem here? Where are we getting lost in translation?

I'm really, really listening.

Peace.

Wanted: A Meltingpot Magazine

2009-11-16T09:10:00.000-08:00

Just the other day I was searching through my stacks of magazines, looking for some sample stories to show my students at Temple, when I came across my three issues of Suede magazine.

Does anyone remember Suede? If you never saw it, you can check out The Fashion Bomb's post about how great it was. Suede was supposed to be the little sister publication of Essence magazine but it was so much better than that. It was this gorgeous, lush, completely original magazine for women of color. It was fresh and unique and had a truly global and sophisticated but not pretentious voice. I actually served as the books editor, but my stint was short-lived because the magazine was shut down after only four issues, due to budget problems.

I was sooo sad when that happened and still haven't found a magazine where page after page I was enraptured. For a second, however, when I heard that Tyra Banks was debuting her own new 'magaline' (that's an online magazine, people) I thought maybe somebody had heard my prayers.

Not so much. Tyra's new magaline, which I think is called Tyra: Inside & Out seems to be a publication about, well, Tyra. Really, it's mostly about her and how she's going to help you, the reader, get beautiful, inside and out. But maybe I'm missing something.

What do you think of the new Trya magaline? Better yet, what do your read off the newsstand or on-line for your media fix of beauty, entertainment, fashion, pop culture and news with a meltingpot twist? Besides, the Meltingpot, of course:)

I'm listening.

Peace!

Burning Questions from the Meltingpot

2009-11-13T06:45:00.000-08:00

It's Friday, people, so that means I have questions. So many questions. Maybe you can help me out.

1. Is it just me, or have you noticed more commercials featuring interracial families on network TV? I just saw a Playskool toy commercial with a little biracial girl and her White mother. And I swear I've seen others recently. Anyone else noticing this trend? And if so, does this mean anything?

2. Does anyone else not really like watching ABC's Private Practice, but sometimes can't help getting sucked into the drama after watching Grey's Anatomy? And if so, did you watch last night and kind of cringe when Taye Diggs leaned over and locked lips with Kate Walsh? Or were you kind of hoping those two might be the new sexy, hot primetime couple? Me? I was definitely on the fence. Not b/c I have a problem with the Black man, White woman thing...no, I just don't like Kate Walsh's character on the show.

3. And while we're on the topic of interracial couples, has everyone gone over to the Mixed and Happy blog and added your peeps to the list of mixed and happy families? They only need 47 more people to post by December 15 to meet their goal of 100 mixed and happy folks.

4. Speaking of happy, doesn't Dominican baseball star Sammy Sosa seem a little too happy about his "accidentally" whiter skin? He claims that his dramatically whitened appearance occurred because his nightly skin cream stripped away the melanin in his face. Oopps! Basically he's pulled a Michael Jackson, going from cinnamon brown to, well, kind of pasty white. Check out the photos at Clutch magazine and let me know if that isn't just a little bit disturbing?

5. And to end on a happy note. Did you know in college I majored in education with the secret fantasy of working for Sesame Street? Well, it never happened, but that doesn't take away from the fact that I still love the show, probably now more than ever. I think I've always loved Sesame Street even as a child, because I saw brown, Black, and White people living together and it seemed like the perfect place to be. As a matter of fact, when the show debuted in 1969, according to Time magazine, " it was one of the first TV shows to depict an inclusive, racially harmonious neighborhood, prompting Mississippi to ban it (briefly) in 1970." (Shame on you Mississippi!)So Happy Birthday, Sesame Street: Here's to 40 more fantastic multiracial, multicultural entertaining, educational and most importantly, hilarious years on television. Do you have a favorite Sesame Street moment?

Peace!

My Name is Not "Precious"

2009-11-11T09:29:00.000-08:00

So I think I'd have to hand in my 'race and identity' blogger card if I didn't take a moment to write about Precious. In case you've been snoozing under a very big rock (or you live abroad) and hadn't heard all of the buzz and noise about the Precious movie , based on the book Push by Sapphire, here's what you need to know to get caught up.

The book Push came out in the early-mid 90's but took place in the Regan era 80s. It's about a morbidly obese, poor, Black teen named Precious, who has been repeatedly raped by her father, sexually abused by her mother and is pregnant for the second time by her no-good daddy. Oh, and she's illiterate. How's that for a feel good read?

I remember reading that book in one sitting and throwing it against the wall at least three times during that time. It pained me to read. It disgusted me and it saddened me immensely because I knew that this slim little volume was fiction, yet somebody, or rather a lot of somebodies, probably recognized it as truth. Needless to say, the story haunted me for years and I always wondered what would have happened to that girl named Precious. I can't say I liked the book, but I appreciated its ability to take me to a place I've never been to before and make me consider my own life, family and relationships differently.

Well, no pun intended, Precious is Huge today --doing well at the box-office and with critics. Oprah Winfrey and Tyler Perry have teemed up as producers on the film and are widely pimping, I mean pushing the film to mainstream audiences with great success. But even though reviews have been overwhelmingly positive, much of the Black blogosphere and some other media outlets are crying foul.

I haven't seen the film yet and don't want to. The only reason I might is so that I can be more thorough in my criticism. Rather than tell you why I'm so not feeling Precious on the big screen. I will beg you to read journalist Akiba Solomon's fierce review on her blog smallmediumlarge.

Here's a taste of what Solomon wrote:

"I saw Precious on Saturday. Two days later, I’m still traumatized and overwhelmed by the sheer degradation of the thing.

This film is marketed–by Oprah and Tyler Perry–as a story of individual triumph over savage abuse. Thanks to newcomer Gabourey Sidibe’s excellent performance, I somehow believed that Clareece Precious Jones—a morbidly obese, illiterate, often greasy incest victim with skin the color of soil–reflected some form of reality. And to me that’s what’s so dangerous and seductive about this fucking thing.

Precious heaps so much context-free, visually engaging emotional and physical abuse on its 16-year-old protagonist that I couldn’t think straight. When her nasty, faceless, AIDS-infected daddy rapes her, when she gives birth to her second child by said daddy, when her sexually abusive, sadistic, welfare cheat of a mama beats the shit out of her, I was so fucked up, so fucking sad, so at a loss for any word or thought besides fuck! that I forgot that this fucking film was an overwrought throwback to Reagan-era tall tales of urban savagery and Black maternal neglect.

Solomon concludes towards the end of her review:

"One could argue that Precious should be evaluated as an individual work of art, a faithful adaptation of Sapphire’s problematic Push. But the same way I won’t laud the technical accomplishments of Birth of a Nation or blissfully ignore how Breakfast at Tiffany’s features Mickey Rooney as a bumbling Chinese neighbor who enters each scene with a gong, I won’t allow the transcendent performances in Precious to distract me from what it says and repeats about [Black People]."

I urge you to read the entire piece and the follow -up postings about the film and its critics at SmallMediumLarge. Oh, and by all means, check out the comments.

I swear between Chris Rock's Good Hair and now Precious, I feel Hollywood is throwing out the worst stereotypes of Black life for public consumption. And it's Black people behind it this time! And I'm not saying we can't have real-life stories up on the big screen, but what is the point of a film like Precious? I don't care what Oprah says, "We are not all Precious." I don't see any Precious in me. None. In fact, I pray to God most people can't find a scrap of themselves in Precious. Author Carleen Brice writes about this on her blog today.

At the end of the day, maybe Precious wouldn't get so much hype and attention if there were more movies about Black people to choose from. And maybe some of those movies wouldn't have to be about pathology and degradation but about things like, oh, I don't know, the power of bedtime stories or two people falling in love via the internet, or maybe a young Black woman's search for true love in Spain. Just for example.

I am throwing my hands up and shouting, "Why?" (School Daze flashback, anyone?)

(sigh) Can anybody convince me that Precious is worth watching. I dare you to try. Has anybody seen it and have a comment to share? As always, I'm listening.

Peace.

What's Your Indian IQ?

2009-11-09T10:52:00.000-08:00

An interesting story written by Race and Culture writer at the Associated Press, Jesse Washington, about a young Mixed Indian/White girl who got in trouble at her school for piercing her nose.

The story begins like this:

"To 12-year-old Suzannah Pabla, piercing her nose was a way to connect with her roots in India. To Suzannah's school, it was a dress-code violation worthy of a suspension."

To read the rest of the article, click here.

Now, what I found fascinating about this story is not that this young girl got suspended from school for piercing her nose, I was way more intrigued by the fact that her father is a Sikh and her mother is a Mormon from Utah. I'm wondering what that Meltingpot household is like? Aren't you just a wee bit curious? (Then again, it does imply that they might be divorced as Dad works in New England and mom and daughter are in Utah. Or not. Either way their family life sounds intriguing.)

Of course that is so not the writer's intention in writing this story. In fact, the rest of the story is about how assimilated Indians are in America, and by contrast, how much does the average American know about Indian culture. If you don't know a lot, but want to know more, the writer offers up the blog Sepia Mutiny for answers and information.

So what do you know? Do you have Indian friends on speed dial or is Slumdog Millionaire your only connection to Indian culture? Or maybe you're like me? I do have some Indian friends, celebrated Diwali in college and never met an Indian dish I didn't love, but yet don't feel like I know a whole lot about Indian culture beyond what is offered up for public consumption by Westerners, ala Elizabeth Gilbert in Eat, Pray, Love. I also don't feel like I have any real sense of what the Indian community in America is up to or up against.

So how much do you know? Care to share?

********************************************

AND IN OTHER (GOOD) NEWS ABOUT THE RACIST JUSTICE OF THE PEACE IN LOUISIANA

This just in. Rather than just getting mad at JOP Keith Bardwell, one woman decided to use the opportunity to show Bardwell and the rest of the world that interracial couples make wonderful parents with wonderful children. And she's asking for your help. Check out her new Mixed and Happy blog and show some support. And at the very least spread the work on your own blogs.

Peace!

Is Class Our Dirty Little Secret?

2009-11-06T07:20:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I caught the tail end of Talk of the Nation on NPR and they were having a conversation about Race. Specifically, they were trying to figure out, one year into Obama's presidency, if the national conversation about Race had changed. Are we more able to talk about race? Does race really matter? In the year 2030, when America reportedly will be more brown than white, will anyone even remember what racism is/was? If you want to hear the discussion, you can listen to it here.

What I found the most interesting about the conversation, though, was not the debate over whether or not younger Americans are less race conscious than their elders, but rather the discussion of class which only came up at the end of the show. Class is what truly divides us as a people, one of the guests said, yet we don't want to touch that Big White elephant in the room.

And I want to know why?

Why are we so hesitant to admit that class divides us even more than race? Even more, why do we condemn those who try to bring up the "Class card?" If I say that I have nothing in common with the Black underclass except the color of my skin, that I have more in common with a White middle-class suburbanite than a poor Black woman living in the inner city, why am I a race traitor? Or filled with self-hatred or in denial. In the words of Bill Cosby, "Come on people!"

Really, it is our similar class status that brings us together here on the Meltingpot, isn't it? Many of us grew up with common circumstances, had shared experiences at school, going to college, traveling...all of which comes from being in the same economic class, not because our skin tones are all the same.

Now obviously there is a sense of shared culture that is undeniable amongst certain groups. Language, for example, will bind Hispanic people in this country despite class status, but even though Maria in the barrio speaks Spanish, I don't think that makes her a prime candidate to be best friends with Angela who lives in a posh suburb in Seattle. They may share a language, but what the hell are they going to talk about?

I don't think I need to argue the point that class divides us more than race. I think it's obvious (but please correct me if you think I'm wrong.). But what I do want to know is why can't we talk about it? Why isn't it our biggest issue here in the United States like it is in many European countries? I have a couple of theories, one being that it is about power. If Black people, for example, admit that we're not one big monolithic group, that Our Kind of People are not exactly paling around with the Boyz in the Hood, we loose power because we loose numbers. And God forbid if we in the higher classes start criticizing our own, then somehow we're giving The Man permission to do the same. Going back to Bill Cosby, he has been lambasted for taking poor Black people to task recently for their self-annihilating behavior. And he's Bill Cosby!

So for us ethnic folk in the United States, maybe it is a power thing or a shame game. We don't want to bring shame to the lower classes of our own group because then people will just assume we're all like that. It's that annoying "judge the whole group by the actions of a few theory." (Yuck!) Of course White people don't have that problem because poor White people don't exist. I'm kidding of course, but poor White people never seem to have a face and since White people are still in the majority in this country, somehow we don't assume that when we witness a poor White person behaving badly, that all White people act the same way.

So, whew, I am clearly on a rampage here today. Thank God it's Friday. So, let me know, why do you think the national conversation about class is so quiet? Would it make a difference in public policy and/or daily life if we publicly admitted that we have class issues in this country? And really, I don't advocate for getting rid of classism, it's just another -ism that is part of the human condition, but if we admitted that there were class differences that divide us, wouldn't we just run things a little differently? Maybe better? With better results? I'm just saying...Tell me what you think.

I'm listening.

Peace.

*********

ONE MORE THING--One Less Racist in Public Office

Keith Bardwell, the justice of the peace in Louisiana who refused to issue a marriage license to an interracial couple, has resigned. But he's still being sued by the couple. For an update, you can read this article. Just thought you should know.

Japanese Salsa with a side of Soul

2009-11-04T09:47:00.000-08:00

No, I'm not talking recipes here. I'm talking about this great story from The Root.com about a Black-American woman who found her bliss teaching salsa dancing in Japan. Don't you love it?

About her reasons for not only going to Japan in the first place, but sticking around and making her home there as well, Ammenah Shareef Asante was quoted as saying:

"Japan is one of the few places in the world I can be respected for what I do. As a black woman when I walk out of my door, I’m looked at as a foreigner. I go into the store they aren’t looking at me trying to figure out if I’m going to steal something. It’s just curiosity about who I am as a human being, and it’s fabulous.

I was so angry growing up, with all of the racial garbage there is in the States and coming to Japan was so freeing."

Interestingly, this is what I thought Spain was going to be for me. But for those of you who read my memoir know, "freeing" probably wouldn't be the word I would use to describe my experience. Well, in some ways it was freeing but there would have to be a caveat, in that it was freeing with a dose of "slightly annoying" on the side. But I digress.

My point here today is that I love hearing about where people choose to go in order to live the life they imagined for themselves. I'm not sure if I have the courage to uproot myself to find that place although I dream about it often or I just check in with some of my favorite bloggers, like Ragazza in Rome and My Girl in Barcelona and live vicariously through them.

So where do you think you would have to go to live your best life? Right now I'm feeling like the South of France or Portugal. But maybe Japan deserves my consideration. Hmmm.

I'm listening.

Peace.

Can "Mixed" Marriages Really Work?

2009-11-02T11:05:00.000-08:00

This is not going to be a post where we rehash the shameful story of the New Orleans justice of the peace who refused to provide a marriage license to an interracial couple (he's being sued by the way.) No, the mixed marriages I'm wondering about are of a different ilk.

So we're sitting at the dinner table this weekend with some new friends of ours. She's from Ecuador and he's a true man of the world, born in Lebanon to a German mother and a Lebanese father, raised on three separate continents, fluent in several languages, and so on and so on. Well, it's Halloween and we were eating pizzas and a fresh salad I had prepared but to my surprise the husband declined the salad. "He doesn't eat vegetables," his wife groaned in exasperation.
"What do you mean you don't eat vegetables," I asked?
"I don't like them," he said.
"All vegetables," I pushed, because I don't understand how an entire food group can be found to be unpleasant. To prove his point, he reached for another piece of the white pizza, because he couldn't even abide by tomato sauce. "That's right, all vegetables," he said.
His wife looked at me with regret in her eyes. "My mother told me not to marry him because this vegetable thing would become a problem, but I didn't listen. I was young and in love. I should have listened."

So that got us on the conversation about mixed marriages. Could you marry someone with drastically different food habits than yourself? I saw a segment on one of the morning news shows once that claimed that food habits were right up there with financial habits when it came to deal breakers between otherwise happy couples. Vegetarians with Omnivores? Kosher vs Non-Kosher? Organics vs. The guy who eats neon green breakfast cereal and pop-tarts? I don't know, can it work? El esposo and I claim it's food that actually brought us together and over the years, things that I love he has grown to appreciate (chocolate chip cookies) and things that only a Spaniard could love (pig fat and green olives) I too can enjoy.

So what do you think? Do you have a Mixed marriage or relationship by this definition? How does it work? Please share.

Peace.

Three Really Hot Burning Questions from the Meltingpot

2009-10-30T09:19:00.000-07:00

People, people, people. What a week it has been. Folks just acting a fool left and right. You know I have questions so here we go:

1. What is Alison Samuels smoking that has made her lose all sense of journalistic integrity? She already made people question her judgment in writing that irritating opinion piece about Zahara Jolie-Pitt's hair, but then she thought it prudent to write a follow-up piece defending the first ridiculous article. Some have suggested she's just looking for publicity in attacking one of the most famous celebrity families on the planet. Others say she is suffering from a severe case of self-hatred which she is projecting on poor Zahara. Either way, I want to know why we have to read about it in Newsweek?

2. And speaking of possible publicity stunts, is that what's behind Tyra Banks' decision to have her contestants on America's Next Top Model pose in blackface -- or better said in "mixed face" -- in some sugar cane fields in Hawaii for the show? If you hadn't heard about this latest hulabaloo in TV land, you can read about it on Yahoo news or check out Clutch magazine's take on the story. I don't know. It makes me uncomfortable on many levels, but does Tyra get a pass as a woman of color to play with "blackface?" Is this just fashion/art? And obviously we don't all have to agree, but are you okay with this? Would you be okay if this is precedent setting and fashion shoots and fashion shows in the future use White girls in face paint instead of real Mixed or Black models? Hmmm... I wonder.

3. So tomorrow is Halloween and the next day is Day of the Dead or rather Dia de los Muertos. I had the great pleasure of being invited to a Mexican friend's home one year to paint sugar skulls and participate in a traditional Day of the Dead celebration. But here's my question. In this month's Cookie magazine (may she rest in peace), they have an article about how to throw your own authentic Day of the Day celebration. Is that okay? I mean if Day of the Dead isn't part of your cultural heritage should you really be celebrating? I mean wouldn't that be like frying up the latkes in early December and celebrating Hannukah? Or ordering in Indian take-out for your own Diwali festival? I mean where do we draw the line people? Or am I reading this wrong? What do you think?

So dear readers, if you have some answers, let them rip.

Happy Halloween and remember to eat all that candy responsibly. Friends don't let friends eat the whole bag of Snickers...in one day.

Peace.

New Links and Chicken Noodle Soup please!

2009-10-28T10:18:00.000-07:00

It's Wednesday. I don't have swine flu but I have a nasty cold that's kicking my butt. I am uninspired to write, but thought I'd take the opportunity to update my links over there on the right-hand side of the screen. I've been meaning to do this for a long time.

I took an hour to add some great new links and then something happened and I lost everything. (grr) So I re-entered everything but probably missed one or two, so if you can think of any obvious links I should include here on the Meltingpot, please send them my way.

I tried to add a bunch of your blogs, my loyal readers, because I love reading what you all are up to. I think I have the coolest group of followers ever. All of your lives sound so interesting. Wouldn't it be cool to all get together and chat over a spicy cup of tea and banana bread? Mmmmmm...warms my heart just thinking about it.

Since I'm feeling blue (and snotty) why don't you all try to cheer me up with whatever you like eat and/or drink when you're feeling stuffed up and miserable. The more details the better. And let it be known, that the best chicken soup I've ever tasted was at this Dominican dive on 5th avenue in Park Slope, Brooklyn. I think it was the cilantro, but ay papi it was sooo damn good.

So what are you waiting for? Tell me what you would make me eat to feel better.

Thank you (sniffle, sniffle, sneeze.)

Peace.

What do "fiery Spanish tempers" have to do with adoption?

2009-10-26T09:20:00.000-07:00

Meltingpot readers, I am hoping you can help.

The other day my five-year old son threw a major temper tantrum in the middle of his brother's guitar lesson. Basically his DVD wasn't playing what he wanted it to. Trauma that only a tired kindergartner can relate to, but I digress.

Without much fanfare I dragged him out of the classroom into the hallway where he could finish his growling and wailing in peace and his brother could finish his lesson. These things happen. So after the lesson his teacher came out and assured me that she wasn't bothered and in fact, she understood the five-year old's display of emotion only too well.

"I understand perfectly. He can't help it. It's in his blood," she said. "My mother is from the south of Spain too and she was the same way. Very emotional."

Okay, since his teacher is Puerto Rican and she had told us that her mother was from Sevilla I did not take offense at this comment but I did think it was a sweeping generalization and that more than his Southern Spanish blood it was his tired five-year-old body that was making my son act a fool. But she kept insisting that my son was simply a product of his genes and his emotions were wont to get the best of him.

"My mother was always yelling and screaming," she said with a nostalgic smile on her face.

So I wasn't really bothered by her comment, and in fact I kind of chuckled as I recounted the story to my husband. We both got a laugh out of it since in our Kinky Gazpacho household I am the emotional one and if our boys are high strung and emotional we figure they get that from me.

So what do fiery Spanish tempers have to do with adoption? Well, as we contemplate adding a wee little girl to this house, I wonder what happens when people make those kind of comments about your adopted child, not knowing that they are adopted? Do you correct them and say, well it's impossible that her temper comes from her Spanish blood because she's adopted? Of course in a situation like that, you could probably smile and move on but what happens when the comments are coming from the family members themselves?

What I mean is, it is so common for family members, myself included, to look at our children and try to figure out where they got certain behaviors from. My older son's shyness we peg that to el esposo. The younger one's penchant for drama? That's all me. I know this could evolve into a nature vs nurture discussion, but I'm just wondering what do you do for the adopted child so that they feel part of the discussion? Naturally and not forced. Do you consciously avoid such discussions in front of your children? Do you warn other family members to do the same? Curious if anyone has an opinion? In the meantime, I'll go check if anything has been written on the subject in Adoptive Families magazine.

Peace.

"Mixed Race People are the Face of the Future"

2009-10-23T06:52:00.000-07:00

Marilyn Minter is a celebrated contemporary artist who only uses mixed race models in her work. In an interview with Artlurker magazine, she explains why:

"I think mixed race people are the most compelling and most beautiful. I wouldn’t call it sentimental as much as prophetic. To me, Alicia [her mixie model]looks like the face of the future.

What do you think of that? Impressed? Feeling fetish vibes? Intrigued? Would it make a difference if Minter were Mixed instead of White? Check out Racialicious writer, LaToya Peterson's take on Minter and others who seem to glorify mixed-race beauty in kind of creepy ways.

Happy Friday.

Peace!

Just A Slice of this American (Meltingpot) Life

2009-10-21T18:20:00.000-07:00

Today I went to a radio station here in Philadelphia for yet another interview about Black hair. (Yes, there really is that much to talk about.) I knew the station had an urban audience, played R&B and hip-hop music and generally kept an urban focus for their talk-radio. My publicist scheduled the interview so I really didn't know much more than the basics and assumed the radio hostess would be a Black woman.

But she wasn't. At first glance, I assumed she was Asian, but since I was mostly chasing her down a long hallway to the recording studio I didn't really get to study her features. Well, as soon as she sat down, we started to talk a bit before the interview and she told me she was actually Black and Japanese. Dad was Black (now deceased) and Mom is Japanese. So of course she had some great hair stories of her own to tell. But that wasn't the best part.

After the interview we kept chatting and I mentioned that my husband is from Spain and she kind of chuckled. "As a matter of fact," she said, "my son is adopted and both of his parents are from Spain but he was born in Newark, New Jersey." You heard me. What are the chances people? Meltingpot mama herself being interviewed by a woman who is Black and Japanese, raising her Spanish son in Philly? Did I mention her significant other is Puerto Rican? It just makes me smile. I love my American Meltingpot.

Peace.

p.s. I'll post the interview when it airs next month.

Because Sometimes Love Just isn't Enough

2009-10-19T13:38:00.001-07:00

This morning I had the great pleasure of being a guest on the Philadelphia-based radio show, Radio Times. We were talking about the politics of Black hair in America, of course, in response to the film "Good Hair."

Radio Times host, Marty Moss-Coane asked me and Philadelphia Inquirer fashion columnist, Elizabeth Wellington thoughtful and provoking questions about the state of Black hair politics today and then she opened up the phone lines for callers to ask their questions. As expected, many people called in, not with questions, but stories of their own hair-raising experiences.

One caller however, is still hovering in my mind. She was a White woman with a biracial daughter. Her husband is Africa-American and she told us she wants her three-year old daughter to love her natural hair so she mostly lets her wear it in an "afro." She also admitted that she doesn't always comb it every day, and sometimes it is a little "matted." She then wanted to know what to do about her African-American in-laws who always had comments and unasked for suggestions about straightening the girl's hair.

My response to the woman was to encourage her to understand that her in-laws were probably concerned that the girl would be judged in this world unfairly if her hair doesn't appear neat and tidy. Now of course I cannot know everything that goes on in this woman's household or mind, especially after only a two-minute conversation on the radio, but a part of me cringed when the woman said she didn't always comb her daughter's hair, and sometimes it was kind of "matted."

What I really wanted to say to her was, "Why would you let your child out of the house with matted hair?" You wouldn't let your White child out of the house with rats nests. There is a difference between embracing your child's natural hair and not taking care of your daughter's hair. Leaving it alone to mat up is not celebrating her beauty. That being said, I don't blame this woman, I just think she needs to be taught some basic hair care skills for her daughter's unique hair, and she should probably read about the complicated history of Black hair so she understands just what her daughter is in for in this lifetime. Basically she has to realize that loving her daughter and her hair just isn't enough.

And that's my segue into announcing that Anti-Racist parent has changed their name to Love Isn't Enough:On Raising a Family in a Colorstruck World. You can read their first manifesto here and tell me what you think. Or better yet, tell them. I think it's a brave statement to project, because it's true love isn't enough to heal these ills. It takes work. Work that may makes us super uncomfortable, and that's where the love is helpful. Because if we really love our kids, we will push through the pain, so they don't have to.

Peace.

Interracial Relationships Making Headlines

2009-10-16T07:54:00.000-07:00

Okay, dear readers, you have all probably gasped, sucked your teeth, shouted a few "no he didn'ts," and rolled your eyes several times because of yesterday's news that a justice of the peace in Louisiana refused to issue an interracial couple a marriage licence, citing concern for the future offspring of such a union. Maybe you didn't read the story, but suffice it to say, it feels like a throwback to life before the Loving decision.

Now before you go deciding that America is so backwards and behind, check out this Politico story about New York City politician, Bill de Blasio who actually found that his African-American wife (he's White) and Mixed children were an asset in his campaign for New York City public advocate. Being in an interracial marriage apparently marks him as a progressive and in tune with issues affecting and important to minority voters.

So maybe Louisiana is an isolated incident? Maybe America is ready to accept and even champion love across the color line. Apparently NBC is ready to push the envelope as Gabrielle Union and John Cho get to be a hot and heavy couple on the new drama series, FastForward. I actually haven't seen the show, but Sky Obercam over at Clutch Magazine wrote about their "Bumble Bee" romance and what it means in terms of progress on television. (I admit, I much prefer the term "Bumble Bee romance" to interracial relationship.)

So what do you think people? Do we get out our poison pens and picket signs and head to Louisiana? Or do we throw our support and praise behind people like Blasio who are putting their families front and center? Where do you think America is in accepting interracial relationships? To be honest, I often forget that I fall into this category, it is such a non-issue in my life. But I have worked hard to get here. I chose a neighborhood where interracial unions are commonplace. I'm now attending a church where multiracial families are a huge part of the congregation, and most of my friends are some sort of colorful. So I basically live in a multi-culti bubble. So, tell me please, does it need to be burst?

I'm listening.

Peace.

Keep Your Opinions Out of My Hair!

2009-10-14T10:38:00.000-07:00

I just don't get it. Why is this article acceptable? I am incensed on so many different levels.

In a nutshell, Newsweek writer Allison Samuels, who happens to be Black, takes Angelina Jolie to task for not "fixing" Zahara's hair, and in fact referring to the poor girl's hair as a "hot mess." (Grrr!!)

I don't have words. Please fill them in for me. What do you think about this article? And is it just me or do you think Zahara's hair is beautiful just the way it is? Is Samuels viewing the girl's hair through her own bias of what's acceptable for Black hair styles? Not to mention, as many folks have pointed out, Zahara's White sisters' hair is just as "wild and free" which would indicate that the Jolie-Pitts in general aren't frou-frou parents who are going to take time to add ponytails and ribbons to their daughters' hair. Even Angelina seems to favor low-maintenance hair-dos, so what's good for mommy...

All I have to say is, shame on you Allison Samuels. For all of your reported concern on how little Zahara is going to feel looking back at her childhood pictures, how is she going to feel stumbling upon this cruel and uncalled for article?

For the rest of you, Peace and Hair Grease
******************************

And we promised to announce our winner for the ?RU t-shirt. Since there was only one entry, Yvonne, it's you. Send me a mailing address and what shirt you'd like, including size, to myamericanmeltingpot@gmail.com. Congrats!