Ang4him

Austin's Prayer

2008-07-21T21:29:00.000-07:00

I had debated which of my blogs this post related to the best and finally decided it really relates to both. So I've posted this on my other blog which deals with my family because it relates to my son. I am also posting it here because God spoke to me through this today.

* * * *

My eldest son, Austin has nightmares and wakes up crying quite often. I've gotten into the habit of praying with him each night and asking the Lord to watch over him each night and to protect his mind. Tonight as I was praying Austin wanted to pray as well.

It was very cute and adorable, but what really hit me was how sincere he was and how very trusting he was. He had no doubt that God was going to answer his prayers. We just spoke of this at church last night. I need to find that faith again, the faith of a child. They never question that we will take care of them or that God will take care of them.

Austin's Prayer:

"Dear God, thank you for this day and thank you for everything.
Thank you letting us go everywhere like the store, and Cheri's and Krysta's.
Please watch over my blanket tonight and keep the bad dreams out of my blanket's head.
Amen!"

(I had already prayed for him and his dreams so he did not think it was necessary to go over that ground again. However, he had told me that his blanket has bad dreams too and that he wanted to pray for his blanket like I pray for him)

Edge of Eternity - book recommendation

2008-07-07T20:55:00.000-07:00

I recently read a book called Edge of Eternity by Randy Alcorn. I happened to pick up this book because I had recently read his book Lord Foulgrin's Letters (I also recommend this) which is very similar to C.S. Lewis' Screwtape Letters. Basically he took the concept and elaborated a bit more (read his introduction in the book for more information on this).

It is a bit funny because I'm also currently reading a nonfiction book by Randy Alcorn called Heaven. This book is very enlightening and I highly recommend it. It is very large and goes into detail as to what scripture says about Heaven and what it will be like. Until reading it I had not realized how little I really thought about Heaven and how little I actually yearn and look forward to my time there. This is important since it is where I'm going to be spending eternity.

But I digress. Edge of Eternity reminded me of Pilgrim's Progress, but the walk being taken is not just the character's Christian walk. It includes the walk prior to becoming a Christian as well. The main character Nick Seagrave is a successful businessman who has recently lost his family due to his drive to succeed at all costs. One night he is caught in a storm and finds himself in a world unlike any he has known before. He finds himself walking a road that is between two realities, the reality of the Earth we know and the spiritual realm many of us rarely if ever give any thought to.

This book is a very good read that will make you think about your current walk in life, regardless of where you may be at this time. I finished the book in one weekend and highly recommend it to anyone who is looking for some good fiction that is thought provoking and will encourage you to dig deeper in your intimacy with the Lord.

Hope of the Early Church

2008-07-06T18:47:00.000-07:00

I'm still reading The Untold Story of the New Testament Church by Frank Viola. In the chapter about the church started in Galatia, quite a few interesting facts are shared regarding the early Church which really got me to thinking:

Over 50% of the new Believers are slaves, many being freedmen (former slaves). A few of the Believers are part of the Roman army and a few may have been merchants.
These new Believers do not have any Bibles, the New Testament had not yet been written. There may have been a few Jews among them with one or two scrolls from the Old Testament.
Only 5-10% of the population in the Roman Empire was literate so even if they had Bible, many would not be able to read them.
Many of the Freedmen are barely able to survive due to their poverty. They would seek work in the marketplace each day to earn one Roman denarius (a day's wage). This would buy just enough food to feed their families. Their diet usually consisted of veggies, bread, wine, olives, fish and fruit. Meat was not eaten very often.
The cities of the Roman colonies were usually dirty, smelly and unsafe. The life expectancy of a male is 45, for females it is 38.
Birth control was not normally practiced. Women would marry in their teens and raise families until they passed their child bearing years.
25% of babies did not survive their first year and 30% of Jewish children died before they turned 18. The percentage for Gentiles was higher. Baby girls were often "exposed" (abandoned to die in remote places) if their parents were poor.
Paul & Barnabas spent only 3-5 months with the people of each church, teaching them the Good News. They would then leave them for up to 2 years before returning.

Reading these things made me realize that regardless of the issues I may be facing right now, it is nothing compared to what these individuals lived with on a daily basis.

But what really amazed me is contrasting these new Believers and their faith to that of new Believers in the church today (including myself!). We are constantly trying to come up with new programs and new things to help Believers better understand what it means to walk with the Lord and have their lives transformed. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against these things and many of them have helped me in the past and still do.

However, these Believers in most cases had never heard of Jesus before and here they are after only 5 months of instruction, living as a Church (eating together, fellowshipping etc) with not only none of the programs we have nowadays, but also no Bible as guidance. From what I've studied so far, they often had the whole "Church" thing down better than any churches in the present. They truly lived for one another and supported one another. Can you imagine how powerful that message must have been to take such deep root in their hearts?

Part of it may have been the fact that their lives in many cases seemed so hopeless and this brought them a Hope they had never experienced. I wonder if we are too comfortable in our own lives, to caught up in ourselves and in our mistaken belief that we are in control of our lives, to really let the Good News of Jesus to take hold of our hearts and imaginations.

I have to wonder, what has changed so much since then. Is it us and how we accept the Good News or has the Good News changed? Or is it a little of both? I know God's Good News never changes, but have we somehow watered it down so we are missing something that the early Church embraced so thoroughly?

Description of Church

2008-06-26T12:04:00.000-07:00

I'm reading a book right now called The Untold Story of the New Testament Church by Frank Viola. The point of the book is to help Christians better understand the New Testament. You see, the letter written by Paul have been arranged in the NT in order of their length.

This book puts them in the order in which they were written and gives you some background into what was going on with the church at that time and the reasoning for each of the letters Paul wrote. It really is eye opening to understand the "back story" if you will of each of Paul's letters. There was a purpose for each of these letters being written, a particular issue that Paul is addressing that was occuring in that particular church at that particular time. (The book does deal with the entire NT, not just the letters written by Paul, but these are the ones which for the most part have been arranged by length).

Right now I'm going through a chapter called The Jerusalem Chronicles which is dealing with the book of Acts. There is one quote regarding the beginning of the church that really caught my eye.

It is 30 AD and the Jerusalem church has just been born. Pentecost has come and the Believers have been baptised with the Holy Spirit in the upper room where they were meeting. This "church" following Jesus has now gone from 12 disciples to 120 in the upper room to 3,000 believers.

"The first instinct of these new Christians is to meet and to meet constantly. The Galilean experience of informal gatherings with Christ as the center is now brought to Jerusalem by the Twelve."

That made me think. When Jesus walked the earth he would sit with his disciples and teach them while they shared a meal. He was the center of it all. Now that he had ascended to Heaven and the Holy Spirit had been sent to the Believers, they followed this same pattern. They met often to teach one another, to fellowship and to eat (often was more than just once a week!). In all of this Jesus was the center of these meetings, not programs or anything else. As they did this they came to love one another and naturally the began to care of one another's needs and the needs of the community.

I think today we loose sight of this so often. I'm doing a study right now on Ephesians at work about Walking the Talk you Talk. One of the recent questions was "If a person is going to walk in a manner worthy of his calling as a Christian - or to put it another way, if a person claims to be a Christian and wants to walk his talk - what would he need to do, according to what you've seen in today's study?" (study that day was on Ephesians 4:14-16)

My answer was the first priority we have is to nuture our walk with the Lord as this is the only way we will truly know the Truth and be able to walk with one another in unity. If we continue to nuture our relationship with the Lord (prayer, Bible study, worship, fasting, etc) then the rest, the fruit of love will come naturally. We try too often to produce the "fruit" on our own. It should be there, definitely, but only God can produce it in us, we can not do it ourselves.

I think sometimes this overflows not only into our personal lives but also into church. As a church sometimes we start to focus on doing for others, the fruit. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but it does lead to burnout if our focus is on this and we are trying to do it of our own power. As a church (a body of believers) we need to first focus on Jesus, the head of our church. The rest will come.

Attack on Marriage

2008-06-22T20:55:00.000-07:00

Many of you have probably heard about how California (where I currently live) as of June 17th has made it legal for homosexual couples to marry. A few years ago the voters had voted down this same thing and it is going to be on the ballot again this fall. However, we have a couple of judges who have decided they know best and they have basically said "Who cares what the voters say, we are going to overrule it all!"

Lynn at Spiritually Unequal Marriage did a post on this a few days ago that is really good. I recommend you take a few moments to read it - What is in Your Camp? - It IS indecent

After reading her post, the comments others posted regarding her post and reflecting on things I've been seeing and experiencing in my own life and the lives of those dear to me I realized something.

The Enemy is determined to destroy marriage. God gave us marriage as a gift, a beautiful thing to be shared between a man and a woman in which they can begin to experience the relationship the Lord wants with each of us. The Enemy hates that, so he is going to twist this gift as much as possible so we miss the true meaning behind it.

This legalization of gay marriage is not the only way he is attacking marriage. This is just the most recent way he has been doing it. Unfortunately, many of us are so focused on just this one thing that we don't realize as Christians we have in many ways accepted other ways he has set out to destroy marriage. Having and raising a family outside of wedlock, living together when not married, have sexual relations outside of marriage and having affairs has become common in our society. In some cases these things are even considered normal and perfectly acceptable.

Then even if we do recongize these things are distortions of God's true gift, we become judges with no compassion. We start to attack the people who are being deceived by the Enemy instead of loving them and just hating the sin. To be honest this is a hard concept to get and even harder to live out. But with God's help we can do it.

I'm asking that you join me. Not only in becoming politically active to try to turn around our country, but more importantly to join me on my knees. Cry out to the Lord to show us how to take back our country, our world while still showing compassion for those who are being deceived. Those who the Lord loves deeply, who the Enemy is currently deceiving. Help us to see what marriage is really about, a true picture of marriage through God's eyes.

Unfortunately right now, the church's view of marriage is not all that different from the world's view. Our track record is just as bad as those who do not attend church. If we cannot "get it" how can we expect the world to understand what we are trying to tell them? Do we each love our spouses the way the Lord wants us to love them? Do we really understand this gift the Lord has given to us. Are we living it out the way He wants us to? I know if I am honest, I have a lot to learn still and I am far from being an example to the world of what the Lord's gift should look like.

Thankful Thursday - Wisdom & Discernment

2008-06-05T09:46:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure if we are supposed to go with a particular theme each week on this or not, so please forgive me if I am not playing by the rules.

Today I am thankful for God’s wisdom and discernment. I am thankful that we can ask for God to reveal His Truth to us and we can trust Him to do so. He will not only do it, He does it with joy and is abundantly generous to give us His Truth when we sincerely seek it.

Lord ~
I ask for your wisdom and discernment for all of us. I ask that you reveal your Truth to us, that we may rely on Your Wisdom instead of our own/the worlds. Where we may be reluctant to accept it, I ask that you transform us. Open our eyes to see, our ears to hear, our minds and hearts to understand.

James 1:5
Now if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives to all generously and without reproach; and it will be given to him.

Proverbs 2:1-5
My son, if you will receive my words and store my commands inside you, paying attention to wisdom, inclining your mind towards understanding – yes, if you will call for insight and raise your voice for discernment, if you seek it as you would silver and search for it as for hidden treasure – then you will understand the fear of Adonai and find knowledge of God.

Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.

James 3:17

But the wisdom from above is, first of all, pure, then peaceful, kind, opent to reason, full of mercy, and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy.

Thankful Thursday - Security

2008-05-28T22:51:00.000-07:00

It is late tonight and year end is coming up at work (meaning lots of hours and stress), so I'm going to keep this short today (at least my part). This week I am thankful for the security I have in my Lord. The Lord has been highlighting the below verses for me this week and they pretty much say it all. Nothing further is needed from me to explain them.

I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have (perfect) peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustraion; but be of good cheer (take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted)! For I have overcome the world. (I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.)

~ John 16:33

You dear children, are from God and have overcome them (spirit of the antichrist), because the One who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.

~1 John 4:4

But now, this is what the Lord says - He who created you, O Jacob, He who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; I give Egypt for your ransom, Cush and Seba in your stead."

~Isaiah 43:1-3

Our True Home

2008-05-25T01:22:00.000-07:00

I spent two nights this past week in a hotel room on a business trip. At first it was kind of nice. Very quiet (as opposed to three young children at my house!) and I could get some reading done in peace, no interruptions. It was a decent room, not fancy, but not bad either.

But after awhile it began to seem a bit dingy and lonely. It was just not home.

I used to travel quite a bit for work before we had children. Back then I did not appreciate the quiet as I do now. I remember though the perks of eating out and having someone clean the room every day. However, I also remember that the novelty wore off fast. I would come home after being on the road and all I would want is a nice home cooked meal and my own bed to sleep in. I missed my own bed, snoring hubby and all!

I recently read something that compared our life on this earth to a hotel room. Jesus told us that we are not of this world (we are just visitors). Our true home is in Heaven with Him. The more I think about it, the more fitting this analogy seems to be.

Living on earth, this life, is nice at times. We experience our share of happiness and good times. However, it is like living in a hotel room. Nothing is actually ours, when we leave we will leave all the stuff behind in the room. Though it is quiet and restful at times, overall it is dingy and lonely. We long for our true home.

Some of us may live in a really nice hotel room right now, but even that gets old after awhile. It is never the same as being at home. Our heart, our soul inevitably becomes homesick. We long for the trip to end so we can sleep in our own bed. We long to go to our true home, Heaven, where we will find our true treasures waiting for us. Our true home where we are greeted by our loving family with open arms.

While we can make phone calls home during our trip it is just not the same as talking to our loved ones face to face and feeling their warm embrace. Although we can lift our prayers to Heaven and commune with Jesus, it is just not the same as meeting him one day face to face, feeling His embrace and having Him lead us to that true home which He has built for us.

Is this how you see your life on earth, as a temporary stop that is just a foretaste of what is yet to come? Is this how you see Heaven? As the one true place where you belong?

I know too often I forget about this. I forget that instead of focusing on this life, I should focus on Jesus and look forward to the wonderful life that is ahead of me. I need to remember that my true home, my true treasures, my true love is not found here on this earth, in this life. We need to live for this day and give our best to the Lord, however we should also be looking forward to our true home in anticipation.

If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.

~John 15:19

In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you.

~John 14:2

Seek the Lord Sunday - Psalm 27

2008-05-24T20:53:00.000-07:00

I have made a new online friend at Call Her Blessed. She had mentioned a weekly meme that she does called Seek the Lord Sunday. This week's subject is Which Bible verse 'speaks' to you lately?

For me right now I would say it is Psalm 27, specifically verses 4-5

One thing I ask of the Lord,

this is what I seek:

that I may dwell in the house of the Lord

all the days of my life,

to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord

and to seek Him in His temple,

For in the day of trouble

He will keep me safe in His dwelling;

He will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle

and set me high upon a rock.

I've recently started listening to a session from RHOP by Diane Parnell called The Gift of God. ("started" because I've only listened to the first half so far. There are to be two more sessions in the coming week that go along with this one). She speaks in it about how God wants to enounter us and has made us to be His dwelling place. She speaks of us seeking after the Lord's heart and character.

The verses above show us three keys for encountering God's heart.

A - Abiding: dwelling with the Father's Glory to discover who he is
that I may dwell in the House of the Lord

B - Behold: gazing on God's beauty, who He is, His character
to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord

C - Commune: commune with the Holy Spirit, to encounter Him in an active way
to seek Him in His temple

I have been meditating on these verses the past few days. As part of that I've been reading the entire chapter. As I've done so I noticed how many worship songs we sing are written based on verses from this chapter. This is an amazing chapter.

I'm realizing that as I seek after the Lord and His wisdom, it is not head knowledge I'm seeking. It is an intimate knowledge of the Lord that I am pursuing. And I want to do it to know Him better, not for something for myself. Where my heart is not right in this pursuit I ask that He will transform it and mold it.

Unrealistic Expectations

2008-05-23T20:09:00.000-07:00

I recently read something that referred to romance novels and soap operas as being the female version of porn. That got me to thinking. I've never been much into soap operas (they move too slowly for me) but I must admit I've been drawn into the "evening" version of soap operas. I've not read what would be considered traditional romance novels for quite some time now, but I do read the "softer" (if you will) romance novels.

Many times in the last few weeks the discussion of the differences between men and women has come up in various ways. The main theme has been that a man's way of showing love is through sex. He needs sex to express his love, if you will. On the other hand, women tend to need the love and romance in order to express their sexual desires. We are both looking for the same thing in the end, we just come at it from opposite sides. Which is what leads to so many misunderstandings in marriages regarding sex.

To make matters worse, the world seems to not only condone, but actually encourages things to make our expectations unrealistic in regards to love and marriage. Our already difficult relationships become impossible when we have expectations of our spouse that are not possible.

For men, this tends to be pornography. Some people may say it does not harm anyone. However the Lord has been very clear that sex is a gift for marriage that is to be shared between a husband and wife. Pornography is bringing someone else into that act. Sure it is not a real person of flesh and blood, however that is often worse. Viewing pornography and the resulting fantasies create the idea of the "perfect" woman in a man's mind. Not only physically, but also emotionally and relationally. No human woman can ever live up to these expectations. Not only is bringing pornography into your marriage disrespectful to your wife, it is unfair to her and yourself.

Now for the flip side of things. While I mentioned that men's focus is on sex, a woman tends to focus on romance. While pornography sets unrealistic expectations in a husband's mind regarding his wife, romance novels and soap operas create unrealistic expectations in a wife's mind about how her husband should be treating her. These things make us think that our man should always be romantic, always be ready to sweep us off our feet and cause those butterflies in our stomachs. They should always be able to take our breath away with a look.

In both cases, these expectations are created because we are focusing on what our spouse should be doing for us to make us happy. It is making the assumption that love is a feeling you have for that other person. The butterflies for us women, the lustful feelings in our husbands. Love is NOT a feeling. Love is a choice we make everyday. It is easy to love someone in the good times, when they look their best and are focused on doing things for us. But real love is making a choice every morning to love that person laying in bed beside you whose hair is all messed up, has bad breath and has not even acknowledged you as they grumpily get up to get ready for the day ahead.

This is especially important if you are in an unequally yoked marriage. You need to lean into the Lord even more to daily make the choice to love your spouse at all times, even when there is no outward reasons to do so. Your spouse does not know the unconditional love of the Lord as you do. They have no example by which to base their love. By getting your strength from the Lord to make the choice to love your spouse you are showing them the Lord's love. Believe me, no matter how much you may think your spouse needs to make some changes and is difficult to love, you are even more so to the Lord. But that does not faze Him at all. He loves you no matter what, with no unrealistic expectations as to who you are.

So this is making me rethink what I expose myself to. It has been obvious to me that pornography is not right in the Lord's eyes and not healthy for my marriage. But now, I'm beginning to see that there are other things that can be just as detrimental to my marriage that I may have been willingly allowing into our home.

We've all heard the saying "You are what you eat". In reality, we are what we allow into our bodies in any way. We are what we eat, what we watch, what we hear, etc. Everything we allow into ourselves leaves a mark on our hearts and minds. What is in our hearts and minds is what is revealed through our fruit, our actions and words. God wants us to be mindful of what we expose ourselves to, not because he is a controlling God who wants to make our lives miserable. It is just the opposite. He wants to protect us from ourselves and the evil that is part of human nature. He wants marriage on this earth to be a reflection of Jesus' future marriage to his Bride, us!

Eternity

2008-05-20T21:19:00.000-07:00

Just a little something from my journal:

God put eternity in our hearts. Our souls thirst for Him. We were created for Him and therefore our lives are empty without Him. WE are empty without Him!

ABCs of Adoration - Psalm 1 - 4

2008-05-19T21:56:00.000-07:00

I mentioned once before about the ABCs of adoration. Last night at house church we did this again at the beginning of the night and included the kids. Afterwards we asked the kids "Why do we adore and praise God?" The answers they gave us were:

* It makes Him happy
* To remind us of who He is
* We were created to do this. This is what we'll be doing in eternity so we are tapping into eternity a little bit by doing this.
* God inhabits the praises of His people, so we are inviting Him to be with us, to come into our midst.

I decided I want to search the scriptures for my own list of adorations. I figured the Psalms were the best place to start. I also want to start doing this with my own children, helping them to learn to search the scriptures for these things.

Watcher
"watches over the way of the righteous"
~Psalm 1:6

Shield
"you are a shield around me, O Lord."
~Psalm 3:3

Sustainer
"I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me."
~Psalm 3:5

Deliverer
"From the Lord comes deliverance"
~Psalm 3:8

Light
"Let the light of your face shine upon us, O Lord"
~Psalm 4:6

Peace/Safety
"I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety."
~Psalm 4:8

Chosen

2008-05-15T19:56:00.000-07:00

I am a huge Ted Dekker fan. I've read the Circle Triology (Black, Red & White) and find him to be a very talented writer. But more importantly he is able to weave in some very important and profound truths about our Lord into his stories. He focuses quite a bit on the battle that rages in us between sin and our new lives in Christ. He focuses on what the books call the Great Romance between humans and Elyon (follows along with what the Lord has been revealing to me about the Song of Solomon).

He has also written a young adult fiction series called The Lost Books that ties into the Circle Triology. I just finished the last book Chaos. At the end there is a part in the book that really hit home with me that I wanted to share.

Silvie suddenly felt the weight of the idea and began to cry with them. Because she too, was the Dark One, wasn't she? They all were, as much as they were all Forest Dwellers, without Elyon's cleansing water.

Yet they were chosen. It was up to them to follow either the one who had made them dark, or the one who had chosen each of them.

(Ted Dekker, Chaos)

We all have sin, darkness, within us. However the Lord has chosen us, chosen us before the beginning of the world to be His. He has chosen us to be loved by Him. We know have the choice of which to follow. The darkness that is inherent in each of us, or to follow the One who chose us before the beginning of time?

For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His pleasure and will - to the praise of His glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One He loves.

~ Ephesians 1:4-6

Thankful Thursday - Family

2008-05-14T21:56:00.000-07:00

I've been asked a couple times now to participate in this weekly posting called Thankful Thursday. So today I'm going to join in. I can make excuses that I'm too busy but in the end those are probably the times when I should be dwelling on this the most.

So this week I want to thank the Lord for my family. My immediate family - my wonderful husband and my three beautiful children. I also want to thank the Lord for my church family.

I was just thinking a couple days ago about where I am right now in life and in my walk with the Lord. I realize some choices could have been different in my life. My husband and I met in high school and married when I was halfway through college. We moved from Washington State where we were both raised to Arizona and then from there to Northern California where we now live. When times are rough, I could always start the "what if. . ." game. But then I realize the blessing in my life are dependent on those choices I've made.

Sometimes I wonder if I had not been rebelling against God in high school, then maybe I would not be in a spiritually unequal marriage right now. Many decisions and situations in my life would be so much easier if I was married to someone with the same beliefs that I have. However, on the other side of the coin, I would not be married to the wonderfully caring husband I am married to right now. I would not have the three beautiful children I have. I would not have moved to Arizona with my husband and ended up with the company I worked for that moved me out here to Northern California. If I had not moved out here I would not have met the amazing people I now call family, my house church. That makes me wonder if I would be walking as closely with God as I am right now if it was not for some of these people and the way we "do" church.

So - today I'm thankful for my family - the people the Lord has put in my life even when my choices may have not always been the wisest. None of my choices ever surprise Him and I need to remember regardless of my past, He has a purpose for me. I'm right where I'm supposed to be right now and He has surrounded me with people I love and who love me. If that is not something to be thankful for, I don't know what is!

For more Thankful Thursdays please visit Sting my Heart.

Florida Healing

2008-05-14T10:35:00.000-07:00

I’m not sure how many of you may be following, or have maybe even heard of the Floriday Healing revival that is taking place right now in Lakeland Florida. I’ve heard and read a lot about Todd Bentley, the man who is part of this. I really like him and believe that he is genuinely a man being used by God.

However, I will admit because of my background I find it hard to really believe some of these things. I believe God CAN heal and I’ve seen it first hand to a certain degree myself. However, individuals that are as outgoing and loud as Todd sometimes put me on the defensive because of past scars. But the Lord has spoken to me lately about the difference between being discerning and being judgmental based on my own human opinions or experiences. My reservations in this case are solely based on thing that have happened to me in the past, people who were not really doing these things for God’s glory. However, I’m also now realizing God still can use these people to do His work.

If you have not checked it out yet, you can see live streaming of this at God.tv

I’m reposting here an email I received from Joni Ames a few days ago (with her permission). Her email hit it right on the head for me. So I’m sharing this, hoping it will also speak to someone else.

* * * * * * *

What Is Going On? Is It Real or Fake?
Joni Ames
May 11, 2008

JoniAmes@aol.com

When I was in my late 20's (I'm now 53), the church I attended took part in hosting a famous televangelist to come to our city. A large, 5,000 seat theater was rented, and many of us took part in volunteering and helping out. I was very excited, and arrived earlier than anyone else, figuring maybe I'd be able to get a good enough seat to see the miracles I'd heard about first hand!

When I got to the theater, the evangelist's staff was already busy. There was a flurry of activity and they were all quite friendly and seemed genuinely interested in getting to know me. I felt quite honored just to be there! I was a young single mom, and this was the most excitement I'd had in awhile!

As the people arrived, the man's staff was very helpful to everyone. People who seemed to have a hard time getting around were especially helped. They even grabbed wheel chairs to put them in, and gave the more feeble ones front row seats in them! When the people said they really didn't need to be in a wheel chair, the staff winked and said, "That's ok! Being in it will give you a better seat!"

I just did what I was told, and helped unload products onto tables, or did whatever was needed. When I was no longer needed, I went and sat in a fairly unoccupied area to observe it all.

I met a precious older lady who was in a lot of pain because she had been in an auto accident. She was there to get healed. I let the staff know that she especially needed prayer. Some of them went over and struck up a conversation with her. They then assured me that she would get prayed for personally by the evangelist during the service. I was excited about that! I wanted to see her healed and was happy to have helped line her up for that!

The meeting began, and the auditorium was quite full of excitement and enthusiasm. Some staff members got the people to begin shouting, "Jesus! Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!" and to do some other kinds of cheers. They also did responsive type of things like, "Do you believe Jesus heals?" The crowd would say, "Yes!" - They would say, "Oh come on now - do you REALLY believe Jesus heals?" And the crowd would again say, "Yes!" - Then they would tell the crowd, "That was pretty weak! If you want Jesus to heal tonight, you better let Him hear you!"

Next, they had little contests with each section of the auditorium trying to see who was the loudest. They told the people that they were going to be on camera, but not to be intimidated. They needed to keep up the same enthusiasm so that it would encourage the evangelist to press in and get the anointing so good things would happen. They were promised that, if they did as directed, they would see and experience miracles that night. - And reminded that they didn't want to "quench" the spirit and stop those miracles from happening. How smart and how kind of these people to help us know how to help God to show up! (I was young, remember?!)

The services finally began, and the crowd was dutifully pressing in to participate in every way in which they had been directed - even to being responsive in the worship. Nobody wanted to be the one to "quench" the spirit and stop miracles from happening.

The evangelist came out and spoke awhile, and then asked if there was anyone there who had been healed in any of his previous meetings. There were several who came up - and apparently they'd been so touched that they became his staff members, because they were all people that I'd recognized as having been those who had been meeting and greeting and helping people get into that night's meeting! (I told you I was young!)

For awhile, the evangelist told some stories about other places and other times when other miracles had happened. Then He said, "Jesus is here now and is going to do it tonight too!!" Wow! The crowd got excited!

Two or three sets of people came up on stage and got prayed for. He seemed to know everything about them! Even their kids' names, and the town they were from!

Suddenly the staff hurried down to the lady in front of me who'd had the accident! Oh good! She was going to be prayed for and healed! I began to cry for joy for her!

=================
WATCH AND LISTEN!
=================
Suddenly the presence of the Lord came on me, personally, in a serious tone. He sternly said, "Watch and Listen! I'm going to teach you something tonight that you will carry with you for the rest of your life!"

The evangelist asked the lady if she had ever met him before. "No."

He repeated the question and added, "So we have never had a conversation before this moment, right?" She responded, "No, but I spoke to some of your staff members."

Irritated, he said, "That's not what I asked. Pay attention. You and I have never had a conversation before this moment, right?" She got a little uneasy, "No, but..."

"Do you believe God knows your name?"

"Yes."

"Do you believe God knows everything about you?"

"Yes."

"Is your name ____, and do you have a son named ____?"

"Yes."

"Let me ask again...Have you and I ever had a conversation before tonight?"

"No, but...."

"Don't interrupt the atmosphere, just answer yes or no to my questions. ...Have you and I ever had a conversation before tonight?"

"No."

She looks down at me, pleadingly, as if to say, "What do I do?!"

He continues, "You had a wreck about 2 years ago, yes or no?"

"Yes."

"You hurt your back and haven't been able to bend to touch your toes since then, yes or no?"

"Yes."

"Do you believe Jesus heals?"

"Yes, but..." He stops her as she tries to say, "But I spoke to YOUR STAFF and told them these things!"

"Don't grieve the atmosphere, just answer yes or no to my questions. ..Do you believe Jesus heals?"

"Yes, of course I do! But..." As he stops her from speaking, she begins to nervously cry.

"There it is! Don't be afraid to weep! That weeping shows that He's coming on your right now!"

The woman looks pleadingly at me again. The evangelist addresses the crowd. He reads a couple of healing verses. He asks them if THEY believe God's word, and if THEY believe Jesus can heal her tonight. They respond enthusiastically, as previously directed to do. The evangelist says, "All 5,000 of you here in this auditorium tonight, stretch your hands forth towards this woman! We're going to see her healed tonight!" He recites a prayer, reminding God of His word, and that if two or more agree, He will do what is asked. The crowd gets caught up in more responsive comments. He tells the lady to touch her toes now (which she couldn't do before) and she does it! The crowd goes wild! He has her do it and some other things she couldn't do several times. Now the crowd is on their feet!

That woman is finally sent back to her seat and he goes over to the wheel chairs and commands people to get up out of them and walk. The crowd goes even more wild!

But I remember that those people didn't need to be in the wheel chairs in the first place. Now I begin to see what is going on.

The Lord draws my attention back to the lady who just got healed. He says, "See her face? She is grieved because she was a part of how things just went down. Get ready to go meet with her in the lobby and tell her not to loose her healing."

The Lord continues, "You see, what just happened here is that I honored My Word, My Name, and the faith of My people. My Word does not go forth and return void, and when 5,000 people agree on My Word and in My Name, people are going to get healed."

"The gifts and calling are without repentance. It is up to each one as to how they use them."

"As for him, I'll deal with him in time. You see, what happened tonight is why My Word says that there will be those who say they healed and cast out demons in My Name, yet I'll tell them to depart from Me because I never knew them."

"But My Word will NOT go forth and return void, and I will honor it when My People believe and agree on My Word and in My Name."

"Go tell her I love her, and not to loose her healing, and explain this to her."

At that, she rose, ran out of the auditorium, and down the hall. I ran after her and did as the Lord said. She just kept weeping and saying, "I don't deserve to be healed! I helped him lie!"

I don't know what ever happened to that lady. She left in tears. As for the evangelist, a few years later he was exposed as having used an earpiece to get information from his staff while he ministered, and he spent time in prison.

I later went on to work for several large ministries throughout my lifetime. At some I learned what to do, and at others, what not to do. Still in all, I mainly tried to believe the best until proven otherwise. Then the Lord showed me in His Word that He really wanted us first to "Test the spirits as to whether they were from Him." So that took me down another road called discernment. Not judgmentalism. Discernment. And love.

In Phillipians 1:15-18, Paul says, "(15) Some indeed preach Christ even from envy and strife, and some also from goodwill," (16) "The former preach Christ from selfish ambition, not sincerely, supposing to add affliction to my chains," (17) "But the latter of love, knowing that I am appointed for the defense of the gospel." (18) "What then? Only that in every way, whether in pretense or in truth, Christ is preached; and in this I rejoice, yes, and will rejoice."

====================
OTHER SIMILAR EVENTS
====================
Since that time, I've worked at and been around many other ministries before God launched me into my own. Most of them were sincere and real. But I've seen many things that were not good as well. I've seen people fake the gold dust, fake the gems, and fake the prophetic. I've watched people try to blow others down, push them down, and cause them to laugh themselves silly. But God is the same yesterday, today, and forever - and is forever real and true. The Holy Spirit is the Spirit of Truth, and God has been faithful to still be real and show up and honor His Word and His Name.

==================
VIVA LA DIFFERENCE
==================
In most cases, we don't have to deal with whether something or someone is or isn't of God. The various "offices" all have their own "personality." The "evangelist" is known as the more showy, loud, excitable, "Simon Peter" type of anointing. They get so excited that they often embellish the numbers in the crowd, etc. - In fact, Simon Peter got so excited that he lopped off a man's ear!

I learned to not expect everyone to do things "my way." But I've also been freed from other's expectations to try to get me to be "like them" as well. I'm a more laid back person. So I minister in a more calm manner.

The Lord showed me that's ok! After all, David couldn't walk in Saul's armor to kill the giant, so we cannot walk in anyone else's personality, style, or anointing to kill ours!

There are people who like the more loud, showy ministries that others can't stand nor receive from. By the same token, there are those who are bored by the more calm and gentle ones. But isn't God good for giving to us a variety so that all can be met right where they are?!

Sometimes we just need to give a little grace to the person to be who they are and to operate in their own personality and style, without demonizing them because of it.

============
WHAT TO DO?
============
Since God uses people, we just have to realize that, although each move seems to bring about a new facet of the Lord, we will also see new personality type in the people He uses to convey it through.

The over zealous ones will try to demonize those who don't run with the new thing, and visa versa. The ones involved in the 'new thing' will try to demonize those who don't participate with them as being religious spirited.

What we need to remember is that God's word tells us that ALL parts of the Body are needed, and to not disrespect or minimize any of it. Additionally, in Eph. 4:16 we are told that "When EVERY part does it's share, it causes growth in the Body."

Hence, we each need to do what we are called to do and finally get that Kindergarten principle down and learn to "Get along well with others!"

======================
WHAT'S GOING ON NOW?
======================
I heard that some Osprey were seen carrying fish over the stadium in Florida where things have been happening recently. Osprey are kind of related to the eagle family. I feel that, through that, God was showing us that the "offspring" of the previous healing evangelist era and the prophetic movement are bringing in the "fish!"

What we are seeing right now is a full blown example of the zealous healing evangelist anointing, combined with the prophetic, coming forth. The evangelist is sometimes wild, loud, aggressive, and seemingly obnoxious. To them, everything is extraordinary and over the top. They need their "papas" - their apostolic/prophetic/pastoral coverings - to help them out so that they don't get strange and out of balance. We all need that! But they are still needed! They are fire starters.

Let's rejoice and take what is happening as a sign that the harvest will now begin to come in. We've been getting equipped and ready for this day, and with the healing evangelist anointing coming forth again, the harvest is on it's way!

In that, don't leave YOUR post if that isn't your call! And you don't have to feel "guilty" or "bad" about it. But let's not try to "kill" them either! Just say, "Yay God! Another part of your team is coming forth!" Then keep on doing what you are called to do and don't word curse them.

By the same token, those who are going full blown into what is happening don't need to say to the others, "Your day is over - get on this boat or die." - Because that isn't true. Those who are called to teach and activate the Body of Christ need to keep on doing it! There is a whole new crew about to come in that we need to tend to and to train up now as well! Their job isn't "over;" rather, it has begun anew once more!

============
BOTTOM LINE
============
So, what is going on? And is it real or fake?

The bottom line is, it takes all kinds to minister to all kinds.

Will there be lying signs and wonders and some fakes? Jesus said there would. But in the process, there will also be some folks who may just be rough around the edges, or different than we are used to, who aren't necessarily demons, but just different. And hey, God used a donkey, and he uses you and me, so why not others?

In the process, God honors His Word, His Name, and the faith of His People. His Word does not go forth and return void. So, when people agree on His Word and His Name, stuff is going to happen.

Are signs, wonders, and miracles a sign that someone is right with God? Not necessarily. The gifts and calling of God are without repentance. If someone is doing something and their heart isn't right, God will deal with them in time. The Word says that there will be those who say they healed and cast out demons in His Name, yet the Lord will tell them to depart from Him because He never knew them.

But, again, even if the person preaching it isn't perfect, God's Word will NOT go forth and return void, and He will honor it and the use of His Name with genuine healings, signs, wonders, and miracles when His People believe and agree on His Word and Name. Good thing. Because none of us are perfect.

- Joni Ames

Permission is granted (and you are also encouraged) to reprint this article in hard copy form, as well as sending them to your own email lists and posting them on your own web sites. We ask only that you keep Joni's web site, email contact info, and author contact information intact.

You can send your NON tax deductible love gift to Joni at: https://www.paypal.com/xclick/business=JONIAMES@aol.com
Or mail it to her at: Joni Ames P.O. Box 99 Elkview, WV 25071
E-Mail: JoniAmes@aol.com Main Website: http://www.joniames.org
Prophetic Newsletter Archives/Web site: http://www.joniames.net
Joni's Ministry calendar: http://hometown.aol.com/joniames/itinerary.htm

To sign up for newsletter, send blank email to:
JoniAmes-subscribe@myinjesus.com

Character of Daniel

2008-05-12T20:17:00.000-07:00

I've mentioned a couple times, that I'm currently studying the book of Daniel right now. I plan to go to Esther next, but I'm still finding nuggets in Daniel. One of the men we consider an "elder" in our house church recently did a sermon at the local House of Prayer regading the character of Daniel.

I highly recommend downloading the podcast and listening to it. There are notes included as well. I think it is a great starting point for diving into Daniel. I believe they only keep the podcasts online for a few weeks though so you may want to download it now even if you can't listen right away.

The Character of End Times Daniel (podcast) - Juan Chapa

The Character of End Times Daniel (notes) - Juan Chapa

The more I read Daniel the more I realize how much we as Christians can learn from his life. The more I read, the greater my desire to become more like Daniel. This sermon has now made me want to go back through Daniel again and start looking for those characteristics that I see in his life that I would like in mine.

Unequally Yoked - Nancy Kennedy at SUM

2008-05-09T11:11:00.000-07:00

As many of you know, I am in a spiritually unequally yoked marriage, meaning my beloved husband is not a Believer. Marriage can be very difficult and being married to someone who does not hold the same beliefs as you, especially when those beliefs are so important to you, can make it even more difficult.

One of the first books I ever read regarding this after I came back to Christ was a book by Nancy Kennedy called When He Doesn't Believe: Help and Encouragement for Women Who Feel Alone in Their Faith. I found the book very encouraging.

Lynn over at Spiritually Uneqal Marriage (SUM) has posted an interview with Nancy Kennedy on her blog. I highly recommend checking it out.

Welcome Nancy Kennedy

Also, check out Nancy's sites

Nancy Kennedy Books
Walk With Me Blog (Today's Christian Woman)
MySpace - Nancy Kennedy

A Whisper of Grace

2008-05-07T13:48:00.000-07:00

One of the ladies over at 1Peter3Living has started a blog for New Believers called A Whisper of Grace.

I'll let you read her testimony on her site, however I can tell you this site is definitely worth adding to your blogroll regardless of where you are in your walk with the Lord. She is very honest about where she is in her journey and the struggles she has faced. As she has come to know the Lord she has often been overwhelmed because she had no past experience with Christianity (was not raised in a Christian home). The purpose of her blog is to help other new believers find resources which compliment where they are currently in their walk without overwhelming, confusing or discouraging them.

However, even if you consider yourself a more "seasoned" Christian you will find this blog refreshing and relevant. Please take a look and drop Lizzie a note to encourage her. God's fingerprints are all over this blog!

ABCs of Adoration

2008-05-04T21:53:00.000-07:00

I was recently told about something called the ABCs of Adoration. We tried this in house church a few weeks ago and are going to do so again next week.

Basically we go around in a circle praying and praising God for who He is. The first person starts with "A". They thank God for an attribute that starts with that letter. The next person does "B" and so on. The children did it with us and seemed to really like it.

So, I started to list attributes that I could think of in my journal for each letter. I'm also going to start looking for these in my daily Bible reading. As I come across them I'm going to start putting the attributes as well as the scripture verses in my journal.

So here are a few that I came up with myself, so far:

A
Awesome, Amazing, Abba, Almighty, Adoring, Adoni

B
Beautiful, Bountiful, Bigger than Life

C
Comforter, Courageous, Calming, Counselor

D
Devoted, Divine, Daring

E
Everlasting, Elyon

F
Father, Faithful, Friend, Fisher of Men

G
God, Good, Great, Gracious, Gentle

H
Holy, Healer, Husband

I
In Love (with me!)

J
Just, Justice, Jesus, Jealous, Joy

K
King, Kind

L
Lord, Loving, Love, Lover of my Soul

M
Merciful, Majestic

N
Neverending, Noble, Never Changing

O
Ominpotent, Omniscent

P
Protector, Peacemaker, Peace, Provision

Q
Quiet (still small voice)

R
Rescuer, Royalty, Ravishing

S
Savior, Salvation, Security

T
Truth

U
Unending

W
(the) Way, Watchful

Y
Yeshua, Yahweh,

Fasting & My Journey

2008-04-01T21:33:00.000-07:00

I've not been posting much lately for a couple of different reasons. First, life has been crazy at work and any time I'm not there I've been concentrating on my family. In regards to my walk with the Lord, I've been going through an interesting journey. The Lord is turning my world upside down and shifting many things that I've always thought to be true. It is very frustrating at times, but also exciting. It is fanning a flame within me to dive deeper into my relationship with the Lord, to get to know him better.

I've had ideas for posts many times over the past few weeks, but have not posted any of them. I'm still sorting through what I'm learning myself in many cases.

With this new found fire, I've been having a desire to fast in order to better understand my Lord. I know people who live a lifestyle of fasting, but it has never made a lot of sense to me. It was something I was interested in, but have not pursued. That is changing now.

I've just finished a study of Song of Solomon. The focus of this study was in regards to Jesus being our Bridegroom and us being the Bride. It concentrated on the depth and nature of the love that Jesus has for us as His Bride and our journey to truely understand and return that love. I've found through this journey that to fully understand the love Jesus/God has for me and to understand his grace, I must start to see the depravity of my own human nature. This is not a "bash myself" kind of thing, but rather a true vision of what/who I am without Him and His Grace.

I've now started studying Daniel. I want to understand how to live for the Lord fully while living in a world that does not. I believe Daniel had this figured out. I want to do this in a way that is not offensive or judgmental towards others who do not believe as I do. I know the Word says God and His Ways will be offensive to the unbeliever. If my living for the Lord is offensive to someone else because of this, that is beyond my control and I'm okay with that. However, I myself don't want to be offensive towards someone because of my pride, etc and therefore become a stumbling block to someone who does not know the Lord because of my attitudes rather than because of their attitudes. Does that make sense?

I was thinking about it this morning and the Lord revealed to me to go back to the book of Esther as well. I read this book many times a few years back as well as a couple of fictionalized versions. I remember at the time comparing it to my own marriage. Esther won the King's heart because she truely cared to learn what pleased him. She was not focused on what she could get from the relationship, as the other girls were. They concentrated on what they thought would attract the king in their opinion. She strove to understand the King and what he desired. I remember thinking that is the way the Lord wants me to love my husband. The problem back then though was I was trying to do that on my own, in my own power. That is not possible.

I now realize that I need to go back and read this again, as this is how I need to understand my King, my Lord Jesus. The more I understand Him and His love for me, the more I will love Him in that way. The more my heart will be in line with His. Once that happens, loving my earthly husband with all my heart, unconditionally will follow.

In addition to that, Esther went through some very lengthy preparations before she was presented to her King. Those preparations are the equivalent to the journey I am on right now. The Lord is preparing me to be presented as a Bride to my King, Jesus. This is exciting! I want to be prepared when I meet Him face to face. I want to be beautiful and pleasing to Him. The way to do this is to allow the Lord to shape me, to prepare me and to focus on getting to know Him better.

No Stone Unturned - Joni Ames

2008-03-22T23:14:00.000-07:00

I received this via email today and found it very encouraging. So I wanted to share it with you. I pray you'll find it encouraging as well today as we celebrate the resurrection of our Lord and Savior.

NO STONE UNTURNED
(A Resurrection Sunday poem)
- Joni Ames JONIAMES@aol.com

So many stumbling blocks I found
Upon the path I trod
It seemed I walked an endless road
As I cried out to God

"Oh Lord, My God, are you not there?"
I said to Him one day
"Do you not see me standing here
Or hear the prayers I pray?"

"Father, where are all the things
You promised once to me?
Where are the things I had faith for?
Where is my victory?"

"Patience, child," I heard Him say
"Endure now to the end
Remember I am on your side
And I call you My friend"

"Did I not spare three men of God
From furnace and from flame?
Do you not know I care for you
For whom I'll do the same?"

"Did I not shut the lion's jaws
For Daniel in the den?
Do you think I don't care for you
But only for those men?"

"I told you, have faith as a grain
Of mustard seed and see
That, as you speak, a mountain moves
And falls into the sea"

"These, the things you see today
Shall pass and fade away
And you SHALL see my victory
And answers as you pray"

"Wait for just a little more
Your answers are at hand
Do not quit - it's almost time
For victory in your land"

"I'm not slack as some men are
For I'm Almighty, True
And I SHALL bring EACH thing to pass
That I have promised you"

"Remember, My Son had to die
And see the depths of hell
But then He rose to victory
And there was praise to tell"

"It seemed that death had taken Him
No future to be found
But those three days, I worked, unseen,
And captives were un-bound"

"Know I do the same for you
I quiet now each fear
Know I hear each prayer you breathe
And count your every tear"

"See that stone upon the tomb?
It stands, but not for long
For soon, each plan will drop in place
Right where it should belong"

"Do not fear now as you see
That all your life is churned
But watch and see all stones removed -
I leave NO stone un-turned" "

The stones or stumbling blocks you see
Are nothing now to ME
For soon, yours too, will roll away
And YOU'll have VICTORY!"

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Happy Resurrection Sunday!
Love in Jesus,
Joni Ames

=====================
Permission is granted (and you are also encouraged) to reprint these articles in hard copy form, as well as sending them to your own email lists and posting them on your own websites. We ask only that you keep Joni's website, email contact info, and author contact information intact.
=======================================
Joni Ames P.O. Box 99Elkview, WV 25071E-Mail: JoniAmes@aol.comMain Website: http://www.joniames.org Prophetic Newsletter Archives/Web site: http://www.joniames.net

Horton Hears a Who & Abortion

2008-03-14T20:55:00.000-07:00

My daughter has been looking forward to going to see the new Dr. Seuss movie which came out in theaters today - Horton Hears a Who. Work is crazy right now with quarter end, but I'm hoping to be able to take her to see this in a few days.

I was surprised to see an email this week from Bound4Life endorsing this movie. Curious I visited their Mercy Seat Blog to see what this was all about. As I read the post about the movie - All Whos Who Have Blood That is Red - I felt the Lord confirming what they were saying.

I strongly suggest you take the time to read this blog posting and then take time to see the movie. My daugther is six and although I haven't given her all the details as to exactly what abortion is, I have talked to her about it. I wear a Life Band, a red wristband with the word LIFE stamped on it. She asked me what is was and I explained to her that there are people who are deceived by the enemy (satan) and don't realize that babies are alive and precious to God when they are in their mommy's tummies. Sometimes people make bad decisions and these babies are killed before they are born. The band I wear is to remind me to pray for these babies and their mommies and to realize that we are ALL precious to and loved by the Lord.

She now asks to pray for these little babies and I believe her prayers are precious and beautiful to the Lord. I truly believe the Lord is calling out to this nation, to the world. One of the things He is calling out to us is how precious Life is. Changing the laws is not going to change abortion - only changed hearts are going to make a difference. I agree the Lord very well may be using this movie to start speaking to us about how precious Life really is.

A person's a person, no matter how small!

I ask that you read this posting and ask the Lord to show you His heart in this area. Please pray for this nation and ask the Lord to begin to move in all our hearts regarding this issue.

“Jesus, I plead Your Blood over my sins and the sins of my nation.

God, end abortion and send revival to America.”

Bound4Life

Dark, yet Lovely

2008-03-08T11:30:00.000-08:00

In my last post I had written about how understanding the grace of God in my life also requires me to truly see myself without His grace. At the end I had included a verse from Song of Solomon.

Dark am I, yet lovely, O daughters of Jerusalem,
dark like the tents of
Kedar,
like the tents curtains of Solomon
~Song of Solomon 1:5

I wanted to give some background regarding this verse.

The woman describes herself as dark, yet lovely and the compares herself to the tents of Kedar and the tent curtains of Solomon’s temple. These describe our outward life (our flesh) and our inner life (God’s Glory in our life).

Tents of Kedar – this describes our flesh, our outward life of darkness. This is our natural tendency as humans to sin. The tents of Kedar to which she is referring, were made from the hides of wild goats and provided shelter for shepards. They were often discolored and black because they were exposed to the weather/climate of the area for extended periods of time. These tents represent the darkness she sees in herself – the outward condition of her life, which is filled with sin and failure.

Tent Curtains of Solomon – In the holy place of the temple there were bright white curtains that were known as the Curtains of Solomon. They could not been seen from the outer court and therefore were hidden from the common people. Only the priests saw them. These curtains represent the beauty that is within her (within us) that only God can see. This beauty is the Glory of God in our lives.

This is why she (and we) are dark, yet lovely.

In the study I am doing right now, it lists four reasons why we are beautiful and lovely to God in the midst of being spiritually immature.

1. We possess the gift of righteousness (2 Corinthian 5:21). He sees us as lovely because of the work of righteousness that He has done in us, not because of anything we have or have not done. We are clothed in his garment of salvation and His robe of righteousness (Isaiah 61:10)

2. When we were reborn in Him, He gave us a willing spirit. God knows that we are fallable, He is drawn not towards what we do for Him, so much as He is drawn to our hearts that say “Yes” to Him. This “Yes” in our hearts will come before any true outward changes are apparent. This willing heart is the work of the Holy Spirit within us (Psalm 51:12)

3. God’s nature/personality. God’s passion for us, how He sees us is totally determined by His nature, His personality. As parents we understand what unconditional love is towards our children. The difference with God though is that even when He is disciplining us, He is loving us fully. He is able to show us all His emotions towards us equally, not withholding one over another. God is love and therefore His view of us in based on this love.

4. We are beautiful to God because of our identity. Who are we? We are the Bride of Christ! It is absolutely certain that our destiny is to be adorned, embraced and enthroned as the Bride of Christ. This alone makes us absolutely beautiful! We need to learn to realize our identity is not in what we do for a living or even what our ministry is. Our identity is in Christ and who we are in Him, the Bride!

His Love / Our Darkness

2008-02-25T20:43:00.000-08:00

Awhile back, someone I know had shared about how they were going through a phase right now where God is revealing to them what they look like, who they are, without His Grace to cover them. He said he had actually been asking the Lord to show him this and he talked about how the Lord showing him this would put him on his face in front of the Lord, weeping.

I remember at the time when I heard this, thinking it was amazing. Imagine how much closer to the Lord this experience would bring you. However, at the same time I was incredulous because I could not imagine asking the Lord to show me that about myself. I had not yet started the Song of Solomon study that I am currently in. I did not yet even begin to understand how much the Lord loved me or how beautiful I am to Him. I couldn't imagine seeing the opposite side of the coin.

Now that I've been going through the Song of Solomon study, the Lord has been bringing numerous other things into my life to help me to understand just how very much I mean to Him and how much He loves me. I'm amazed at just the little bit that I am now starting to understand. How much He loves me, because that is what He created me for, not because of anything that I do.

With this though He has shown me something else. While reading the Final Quest by Rick Joyner, I came to the chapter called The White Throne. I wrote briefly about some of this chapter in the posts The Sheep and the Goats as well as Focus: Ministry or People.

In this chapter, Rick's vision has brought him to the Throne Room of Christ. He begins to see himself and others that he has thought of as great Christians, as they really were on earth. He begins to see that what we see here in our lives is not necessarily reality. It began to make me think about what I really look like without God's grace. While thinking about this I realized something:

Until we can start to see what we look like to God without His Grace, we can not fully appreciate His Grace or how beautiful we are to Him through His Grace.

I don't know that I'm at the point that I'm ready for Him to show me who I am without Him or His Grace. I'm don't believe we can ever be truely ready for that experience. I'm just beginning to understand the darkness that is within me without my Lord and the love that He holds for me regardless. It has been an amazing experience so far!

Dark am I, yet lovely, O daughters of Jerusalem,

dark like the tents of Kedar,

like the tents curtains of Solomon

~Song of Solomon 1:5