Seriously. No. Seriously.

What Remains

2009-07-14T16:36:00.003-04:00

“The dandelion is a gawky yellow flower that blooms and then collapse into a soft, clumsy down that little children blow wishes on. There was a sea of dandelions in our back yard on Madison Hill, and Grandma Binder, swinging her scythe, would mount a futile attack on them in her housedress and apron. They grew into a clotted forest of long, milky necks in the backyard, and the best she could hope for was just to cut them down to stubs. It starts with one slouchy weed – pluck it out and it’s gone. You never quite remember, can’t pinpoint the time between when there was one week and a sea of them. There was a time when the thing seemed manageable, and then we were looking backward over our shoulders, running away from it.” ~ from What Remains by Carole Radziwill

This memoir by the wife of the late Anthony Radziwill (nephew of the late Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis and cousin [and best friend] of the late John F. Kennedy, Jr.) lays out the life C. Radziwill lived as a young girl, a budding journalist, a young woman in love, a fighter, and one who lost more than seems imaginable in only three weeks' time.

The way in which she deals with her husband's invasive cancer and growing weakness show her for the true class act she obviously is. And how deeply what life has dealt her can hit someone square between the eyes...

“But cancer showed up like an unplanned pregnancy and completely defined who we were together.

We flash helpless smiles at the rest of the world when it pops in. It is subtle, the performance. We show up at dinners with friends and with family. Anthony handsome and charming, me by his side. The truth is my husband is dying, and we are lonely together. There is the disease and the person, and though I am living with one has robbed me of the other. He is devoted to something else. It is in some ways similar, I imagine, to an affair, only in an affair I could pack my bags and storm out, slam the door shut, clearly wronged. There’d be some satisfaction in that. This is a secret he won’t talk to me about, and I am not allowed to resent it. When he looks at me he sees his disease. I am managing it, too closely connected to it for intimacy. I reflect it, and I suspect this angers him. After a point, the cancer, and the thing we both hate, is that only thing that we share.”

This book is a super read on so many levels... for its Kennedy connections, its true to life language, its ability to make you feel the pain, its subtle way of getting under your skin.

It's up for grabs for anyone who wants it.

Nature Girl

2009-07-11T22:49:00.000-04:00

I have been working on this project for quite some time, and it has finally all come together as close as it can come to the way that I had pictured it in my mind.

Addie is my absolute Nature Girl.

She loves everything outdoors... weather... animals... bugs... rocks... plants... And she's a pro-collector... leaves... butterflies... stones... snake skins... I used a thin piece of cork board and attached it to the layout then used small sewing pins to attach the items, (some needed The Ultimate Glue, too.) I took little tiny tags and inked them and put the "regular" name of the item (i.e. pinecone,) and on the other side, the scientific name, (for pinecone it's Pinophyta Strubius.)

The challenge was to create a layout using Graphic 45 papers using color photographs, and the Botanicabella line totally spoke to me for this photo of Addie blowing a wish flower. I also had a nice collection of things she had found and given me... ivy (in the shape of a heart she found just for me)... a special rock... a piece of a blue robin's egg... a seashell... along with some notes she took on a hike with Sean.

If you lift the field notes you will find her notebook paper and pencil drawing of one of the sights she saw on her hike of an inchworm hanging from a tree. I covered the drawing with mica using Sepia Accents.

Combining this photo and the notes and the collection, I created this layout especially for her... to remember the love of nature this little girl has.

The ultimate inspiration for this piece was the stick that the layout is tied to for hanging. Addie found this amazing stick covered in lichen, and I asked her if I could have it to make something out of it, of her.

We had a great morning this morning at Borderland State Park where we took a hike, just the tour of us with one of the ranger's, Joe, and learned about dragonflies. Joe was duly impressed with Addie's knowledge of insects, birds and nature. He said that he teaches school groups of 30 kids and has only met one other girl like Addie. She is truly a Nature Girl.

Here are a few shots from today...

Nature Girl Cardstock: Graphic 45, Bazzill Basics
Paper Stamps: Stampin' Up, source unknown & Close to My Heart
Ink & Adhesive: Ranger
Plastic, Canvas & Chipboard Letters: Lil Davis
Tags: ProvoCraft
other: mesh, twine, pins, seashell, stick, egg, moth, pinecone, cork, leaves, rock, pencil, wooden letters, Scrabble tile & wood

Happy 4th

2009-07-06T00:34:00.000-04:00

The Red Tent

2009-06-27T22:47:00.003-04:00

A good book teaches a good lesson.

And of all the things to gather from The Red Tent by Anita Diamont, this lesson comes inferentially through a stunningly written book about a strong and remarkable woman, Dinah, daughter of Leah and Jacob, son of Rebecca and Issac, son of Abram.

The story begins by unraveling the history and background of Dinah's "mothers," her biological mother, Leah, and her sisters, (Dinah's aunts,) Rachel, Zilpah, and Bilhah because, "If you want to understand any woman you must first ask about her mother and then listen carefully. Stories about food show a strong connection. Wistful silences demonstrate unfinished business. The more a daughter knows the details of her mother's life - without flinching or whining - the stronger the daughter."

Dinah, the only girl, revels in being doted on by her mothers and is folded into their tightly woven sisterhood. But she is, alas a daughter and realizes this when her parents ruminate over Leah's step-mother, Ruti, "There was no room for me between them, no need for me. My mother's eyes were full of Jacob. I did not matter to her the way she mattered to me. I wanted to cry, but I realized that I was too old for that. I would be a woman soon and I would have to learn how to live with a divided heart."

Dinah comes of age in an age beyond her teachings. Although not allowed to speak as such, Dinah's thoughts show how enlightened she is. Her hate for Ruti's subservient ways would be something women then would not have felt.

The significance of the red tent encompasses that "secret society" we women covet. And even when the secrets are revealed, the language is one that men cannot hear. "'In the red tent, the truth is known. In the red tent, where days pass like a gentle stream, as the gift of Innana course through us, cleansing the body of last month's death, preparing the body to receive the new month's life, women give thanks -'"

Many disappointments outline Dinah's life... the missing connection she feels with a grandmother she "imagine would understand [her] instantly and adore [her] above any of [her] brothers"... the betrayal of her brothers and their viciousness... her enormous losses... but her great insight helps her to realize why they exist, "The painful things - ... seemed like knots on a beautiful necklace, necessary for keeping the beads in place."

Ah, that I will remember what those knots are for.

{This and Sea Glass by Anita Shreve are both up for grabs for anyone who wants them.}

RIP Michael Jackson

2009-06-26T16:48:00.002-04:00

Wednesday Spaghetti

2009-06-17T21:30:00.004-04:00

We have happily jumped on the saucy bandwagon called Wednesday Spaghetti! As stated on their site in their mission statement...

Wednesday Spaghetti was formed to increase public awareness of the need for families, caregivers, and peer groups to spend quality time together in an in-home, casual dining setting in order to discuss general life issues, household guidelines and practices, personal habits, issues, and goals, educational habits, issues, and goals, employment habits, issues and goals, family habits, issues, and goals, physical health-related issues, emotional health-related issues, spiritual issues, relationship issues, community events and resources, and other such topics; to support and conduct nonpartisan research, educational and informational activities to increase public awareness of the importance of togetherness, communication, and good nutrition; to provide simple to make, nutritious meals to any family or group in the community, regardless of race, color, creed, religious beliefs, ethnicity, economic status, or location at no cost to the family or group.

So, in the interest of communicating a sense of community, value and care to our children, to others and to ourselves we have begun the weekly tradition called Wednesday Spaghetti.

Tonight we had 9 friends for a pot of spaghetti with sauce and meatballs... some garlic bread... watermelon... freeze pops... ice cream... brownies... and some extra treats brought by our guests... and we had SUCH a nice night. The kids played, the adults ate, the hamster had a workout and we can't wait to do it again next week.

Thanks to our guests for what you brought, but also for coming! What a great success!

Connor & everyone helps clean up!

Liam jumping in a mud puddle & the kids looking for a snake!

Addie eating an ice cream & the "kids'" table!

This Day is For

2009-06-14T21:13:00.004-04:00

Guess who?

This day is for celebrating... for looking back... for looking forward.

This day is for singing... reminiscing... for being hopeful.

This day is for questioning... promising... for projecting.

All of this is for you.

But for me, it's a day to tell you how much I love you.

I love you, Mom.

Sea Glass

2009-06-13T12:23:00.003-04:00

Sea Glass by Anita Shreve is a narrative novel that unfolds during the tight times of the Depression. It highlights the lives of two newlyweds and those that encompass their tight, but varied circle of friends, co-workers, and comrades.

It's a truly gripping account of the nitty gritty life of people trying to make it in a time of bread lines and strikes. From the couple just starting out to the privileged elite, the effects of the times touched all.

Sexton, the young virile salesman and wife of Honora who must humble himself.

Vivian, the rich debutante with money to spare and a heart that turns to gold.

McDermott, the quiet thinke with more honor than most.

Alice Willard and her hopeful letters.

Alphonse, the young boy with the experience and ways of a man.

And Honora. Naive, then worldly Honora who loses her visions, and dreams, and innocence and gains wisdom, but a wisdom with at an enormous price.

The dissection of the marriage between Honora and Sexton is so well written and more relevant than any I've encountered in any book.

At one point when Honora has had it with Sexton and his whiny, reclusive, unaffectionate ways, she feels the need to talk to Sexton about something that's truly upsetting her. And that is the moment Sexton brings home a gaggle of people to the house for a few days of work. The energy and zest these people bring to their home is palpable, and it invigorates Sexton for the first in a very long time. However, at their first moment alone Honora brings up what's bothering her.

The words that describe how Sexton feels about this opened my eyes to the juxtaposition between a husband and a wife. Men and women think and feel so very differently and if we could just acknowledge a little more how the other thinks and feels, things would run a lot more smoothly.

Sexton thinks, "Jesus Christ, why is she doing this? Doesn't she see that it's the first time he hasn't felt like a bum since Christmas? He hasn't felt this good, this useful, since the late fall, nearly a year ago. And she wants to pick this particular moment to have this fight? Has she forgotten what it was like all winter and all through the spring, when he was so tired and depressed and... ashamed... that he could hardly look at her?"

The vulnerable hidden beneath a false facade of bravado and the air of not caring.

The story of a marriage, of friendships, of hardships, or trying times and what endures, Sea Glass is a great read. It would make a compliment to history studies on the Great Depression in high school, too. The novel is a personal account of life in the time my grandparents grew up.

Sea Glass is up for grabs... if you want it, let me know.

The Universe

2009-06-09T09:39:00.002-04:00

There will always be people in your life, Michelle, who hold you back, who cost you too much, and who fail to see all you've done for them. But, of course, they're just there to teach you that you do have time, that you'll always be rich, and that your own high standards are all that matter.

Day at the Beach

2009-05-31T20:32:00.003-04:00

It's that simple.

Nantasket

Joseph's

Arcade

Ice Cream

Back to the Beach

The End.

I am a Bridge

2009-05-28T14:28:00.002-04:00

I am a bridge. A connector. A pathway to a destination.

I have coupled people to people; people to jobs; jobs to people; people to opportunities.

I am the segue. The transition. The journey.

I have been there. I have facilitated. I have connected.

I am not jealous. I am happy for those that have benefited from what I have been able to connect them to; to those who have met someone through me. I am not bitter. I do not have any regrets.

I can and will continue to make those connections. I am happy to put what's right with what's right.

I am a bridge.

It's just lonely sometimes watching the parties on the islands alone from the bridge.

Worthy Art Thou of Acclaim

2009-05-26T19:35:00.003-04:00

Traveling back in time
to when we were more...

more energetic
more giddy
more youthful

And meeting today
as less...

less judgmental
less self conscious
less fickle

less really is more

connections made
friendships reignited
love shared
pieces remembered
others forgotten

Here's the the Woodward School for Girls, Class of 1988, with hearts of joy!

Nice to see you.

I was ta88ed...

2009-05-14T22:30:00.003-04:00

{silo 8 by uberllama}

I like being tagged. I think it's fun. And when it's through cyberspace it never hurts!

My NE pal, Elizabeth

8 Things About Me

8 THINGS I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO

Scrappin' in Sturbridge
Sunday
my reunion
nice weather
Liam doing another poop on the potty (it's a big one here)
payday
seeing Michelle
winning the lottery

8 THINGS I DID YESTERDAY

went to softball practice
went out for dinner
went out for ice cream
ate a bologna sandwich
watched American Idol
almost finished The Red Tent
went to Michael's
showered

8 THINGS I WISH I COULD DO

gymnastics
drive a stick shift
fix more things
sign
sustain
spend as much money as I want
complete triple what I do in a day now
capture what I really see

8 SHOWS I WATCH
I'm not even going to bother boring you with this... see here.
I will list though, what I'm looking forward to for summer TV:

Big Brother
Glee
Wipeout (only because of Addie)

8 is a magic number.

Triple Teen Tome Time

2009-05-13T09:11:00.006-04:00

You know I like to read teen and young readers now and again... to break up my reading, (I'm wicked intense about it, so it's a nice deviation, and I'm also a teacher and like to read what the kids are reading, {or have to read!})

In the last month or so I have read 3 young readers/teen books that I'd like to share.

The first one I read on suggestion of a sixth grader who had chosen it as a book report topic, the second I read out of pure peer pressure, (pressure being from young and adult alike!) And the third is a classic that I had never read before.

Rules, Cynthia Lord's debut novel is a significant glimpse into twelve year old Catherine's life. Catherine's brother, David, has autism and that fact affects Catherine (and the whole family,) in what Catherine feels is an abnormal way.

David needs rules. He likes them. He craves them. But the irony here is that so does Catherine. She needs them for David. And she needs them for herself.

The beauty of this book is that it shows that Catherine's life really is normal. Because normal is what we are. What we experience.

This is a great read for anyone who has experienced autism in any way.

And the peer pressure book, what else could it be? Twilight. Another debut novel by a new author, Stephanie Meyer. I didn't have any intention or desire to read the first book in this series, but I did become intrigued and gave in.

So, here's the deal with Twilight.

It's definitely a teen book. And it's well written on a teen level. That's a good thing. There's a real need for good quality teen books that are interesting and relevant.

Within the first few pages we already see the strength of Bella, and her determination to be who she is. "No one was going to bite (her.)"

Bella is the perfect heroine. A super role model for teenage girls. She is strong, determined, brave, and curious, while also being confused, fallible, anxious, and HUMAN.

Finally, another series book, the first of Madeleine L'Engle's Titles in Time Quintet, A Wrinkle in Time.

A tween book from the past about the future, A Wrinkle in Time chronicles the adventure of Meg Murry, her brother Charles Wallace, and their friend, Calvin through space and time to save the universe and the Murrys' father who is caught somewhere in time.

The complicated series of events on the adventure result in an other-wordly, peaceful conclusion that brings this story to a quiet end.

All three books are great reads for different reasons. And Twilight is up for grabs if anyone would like it!

Being a Mom

2009-05-10T21:19:00.004-04:00

Being a mom is lots of things...

it's hard.

It's fun.

It's stressful.

It's a privilege.

It's special.

It's heartbreaking.

It's heartwarming.

But being a mother is not possible without there being a father. Whatever form or shape or idea he is... he is.

And, for me, being a mother comes with the sincere honor of fulfilling this role with an amazing man who makes my role as a mother, not only easier, but much more gratifying.

This Mother's Day I am of course, grateful for my children, (as well as the beautiful cards they made me and the pretty flowers they picked me.)

But I am also thankful for my husband, who is so much more than my husband, but the amazing, dedicated, loving father to my two little blessings.

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers, (in whatever form, shape or idea you are.)

10 Shows I Can't Miss...

2009-05-05T22:28:00.015-04:00

It's almost down to the wire... most shows have just one or two left before the season ends... soon we'll be upon the eve of summer television, and one can never say exactly how that one's gonna go... so without further adieu... the 10 Shows I Cannot Currently miss... (in no particular order...)

1. American Idol
Of course... so, we're down to 4 until tomorrow. Will they do a bottom 3 when there are only 4 left? If so, Adam will be the only one left off. And Allison will go home. I really liked Kris tonight. I thought he rocked the Beatles tonight. Adam will win this thing. Danny second.

2. Celebrity Apprentice
Down to two, and are they the best two? Not sure. Trump just wants a showdown and with Joan and Annie, that's guaranteed. I think Annie will win. She's ruthless, egotistical, selfish... and if last year's winner is any indication, Trump loves it.

3. Southland
LOVE it! I am SOOOO addicted. There's only been like 3, but I am totally hooked. The only thing about this show, though, is, that I have to watch it on DVR. It's so intense and sometimes hard to hear, that there is a significant amount of replaying involved.

4. Flashpoint
Started watching this on a whim and can't stop. Love Enrico Colantoni (who will always go by Elliot to me,) he is so great in this show. Well done, smart... great show.

5. Grey's Anatomy
That's a gimmee, right? And season finale is Thursday. Looking forward to the wedding. It will be good. These two do belong together. It would be nice if they began as a strong couple and stayed that way. (Always wished Mark Green on ER has stayed with his wife, there's got to be some hope in marriages. Even on TV.)

6. Hell's Kitchen
I'm actually going to be bummed when this one's over. I LOVE Gordon Ramsay! He's the &(*^%$ best *^^%^* guy on &*^%$$$#!!! Either Ben or Paula will be a great winner. Now piss off.

7. Dancing with the Stars
It's just easy and entertaining and fun. Gilles is probably going to win this...

7. A mazing Race
One show, three teams left. I have to be honest and say that I'd be fine with any of the 3 winning, but I'm most hopeful for Margie and Luke and the redheads. Tammy and Victor got really lucky with so many of the legs being in China, and even having a task that required the racers to speak Chinese.

8. Brothers & Sisters
I'm a little behind, but this show is so well written, well acted, and entertaining. Long live B & S!

9. 90210
Yes, I'm a groupie. I love it. Naomi kicks ass and I love seeing Kelly and Donna. It's just pure brain candy.

10. Castle
It's no Southland, but it's fun. Castle is witty, Becker is savvy, and the two of them are the new Sam and Diane. Love it.

Happy viewing!

School Vacation Week

2009-04-23T14:49:00.003-04:00

I can't believe it's Friday.

A week with no school, bickering, playing basketball, blowing bubbles, a birthday party, irritation, softball practice, fun, disagreements, a Cape trip, spending time with friends, a business trip, a day of scrapping, the playground, making Shrinky Dinks, a training, the beach, yelling, reading books, make your own sundaes, sleepovers, arguments, movies, staying up late, work, shows, a play, setting off rockets, and more...

The good. The bad. And the ugly.

Glad it's here. And glad it's almost over.

{photos by Kristin Sandahl}

Used

2009-04-18T22:30:00.004-04:00

{Never To Be Used by johnmartine63}

I've been used a lot. And the truth is, I really don't mind.

I've been stepped on and stepped over enough times to know few things...

#1 - Your insecurity shows like a zit on your face. Your behavior shows from far away. Clear are your tactics and your semantics and your ways. They show, and I'm in tune with them. Hope you don't find it surprising to know that I can see it coming.

#2 - Being used is way more about you than it is about me. You may think you are hurting me or that you are putting yourself in a better light than me, but really, this is totally about you. Isn't it always about you? Check that insecurity.

#3 - What you have gained is on very shaky ground. You may not know it now, but I do. And you will.

#4 - Users are transparent.

#5 - People know this about you.

Being used is not that big of a deal. Because it's really about you. Not me. And I don't really give a shit about you.

10 Things I'm Into Right Now...

2009-04-15T00:40:00.008-04:00

1 - Sea Glass

LOVE this book by Anita Shreve. Finished it last night and now it will settle in my soul.

2 - Cinnamon Iced Decaf

Can't do hazelnut anymore... too sweet, (can you believe that? Me with my extra cream and extra sugar?) Tried no flavor and was loving it, but had to try something, and I'm on the cinnamon now.

3 - Windows open

Good God, is spring FINALLY here?

4 - DVR

I seriously do not know HOW I lived before having it. I hardly watch a thing live anymore, (even if I am only minutes behind.) It really sucks when you screw it up, though.

5 - Lux

I'm obsessed with going there. I really want to see 17 Again, looks so cute! And while we're on the subject... I'm also SO into the Cap'n Jack Chicken at the Lux... YUMMY!

6 - Brownies

I make like 3 batches a week. Sick of crappy junk.

7 - TMZ

Can't get enough. Must go there.

8 - Dancing With the Stars

I HAVE to see every one this year. Loving this season.

9 - Clorox Wipes

Okay, I'm really into these all the time. But I'm just using so many lately!

10 - Kenra shampoo and conditioner

LOVE my new haircut and this stuff's the best!

Happy Easter

2009-04-12T09:26:00.003-04:00

Me Talk Pretty One Day

2009-04-08T20:52:00.003-04:00

Time for a book review... I'm a few books ahead, so here's one today...

Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris.

Read this one on a recommendation by a friend, and for fun.

A funny, sardonic, tarty collection of thoughts by a sarcastically smart author.

Need a laugh? Pick one up here.

Love the chapter on the Rooster, (what Sedaris' brother calls himself when he's feeling threatened.) "When I was young, we weren't allowed to to say, 'shut up,' but once the Rooster hit puberty it had become acceptable to shout, 'Shut your motherfucking hole.' The drug laws had changed as well. 'No smoking pot' became 'no smoking pot in the house...'"

Love Sedaris' view on fear and hate! It's such commonplace now to attach the hate of something on one's fear of it. What a crock! "The word phobic has its place when properly used, but lately it's been declawed by the pompous insistence that most animosity is based upon fear rather than loathing. No credit is given for distinguishing between these two very different emotions. I fear snakes. I hate computers. My hatred is entrenched, and I nourish it daily. I'm comfortable with it, and no community outreach program will change my mind." There's a diatribe following on why he hates computers... really funny!

My favorite chapter, I Pledge Allegiance to the Bag, hilariously describes exactly how I feel about the green issue. I have such a problem saving the planet, me, myself. I hate recycling, (not to be confused with my fear of it,) and big companies flaunting what they do for the environment. Couldn't have conveyed it better myself...

"At a chain coffee bar in San Francisco, I saw a sign near the cream counter that read NAPKINS COME FROM TREES - CONSERVE! In case you missed the first sign, there was a second one to two feet away, reading YOU WASTE NAPKINS - YOU WASTE TREES!!! The cups, of course, are also made of paper, yet there's no mention of the mighty redwood when you order your four-dollar coffee. The guilt applies only to those things that are being given away for free. Were they to charge you ten cents per napkin, the would undoubtedly make them much thinner so you'd need to waste even more to fight back the piping hot geyser spouting from the little hole conveniently located in the lid of your cup."

Hey, after all, you Can't Kill the Rooster.

**This book and Vanishing Acts (signed by the author) are both available for the taking... if you want either or both, just let me know.)

today

2009-04-07T19:48:00.005-04:00

Sometimes there's not a lot to give
between me and you
Sometimes
it seems too hard to do~
the day to day.

Some days are special~
some unexpected little days
when something happens and we didn't expect it

and some days are so hard to get through!
in big and harsh ways that we did expect
or didn't

Some days are just days
breathing, eating, driving, taking care
just regular everyday days
that bring no pain
but no certain pleasure

And some days have a purpose
they are there for a reason and they
are markers
of time
of age
of remembrance

Today's your day
and
I am glad it's here
and you, too

Wanna meet a real Patriot?

2009-04-04T07:59:00.004-04:00

Come meet New England Patriot, Jarvis Green #97

TODAY

12pm-12pm

Game Time Cuts
1978 Washington Street
Hanover, MA 02339

Same make, model and year, just red

2009-04-02T22:38:00.003-04:00

We bought this today.

Thank God, because we really needed it.

It's the exact same make, model and year as our current one, it's just a different color and it's... hold on to your hats... the Warner Bros. version, (whatever that is!)

Just so glad this is done!

I HATE having to buy a car. I swear to GOD it's worse than buying a freakin' house! Unless you have some good cake, you never buy a car because you WANT to, you only buy a car because you NEED to.

Glad this turned out okay for us.

No April Fool!

2009-04-01T23:29:00.004-04:00

My good friend Brandi let me in on a little secret today...

You can win one of 5 FREE spots at this year's Scrap Etc. event!!!

And the ways to win are very simple...

You can just make a post here.

Or you can have friends post and say they referred you (and do the same for me) and all mentioned will be eligible to win.

Or post the contest on your blog and post its link in the comments.

Or post a link in the comments of another place you posted the contest.

Or post the contest on Twitter or Facebook and you'll be entered.

Easy Peasy... so go try to win!