who knows

Milan - July 2009

2009-07-12T10:04:00.001-07:00

July 9, 2009 - Thursday
- wake up early to pack and clean out fridge since apartment management coming to sign us out
- take 9:24am vaporetto to Ferrovia
- get on trenItalia for 10:50am departure to Milano
- train's sandwiches weren't very good so finished rest of food from apartment we lugged onboard

- late arrival in Milan, expected was 1:22pm, arrive after 1:45pm
- drag suitcases and run to Stazione Centrale exit (not easy with the number of people, restricted (narrow) entrances to escalators, ramps, many didn't have lunch)
- M runs to taxi queue outside trying to get 2 taxis since there are 6 of us and each taxi can only take 4 people, no one wants to double up since we tell them we're headed for the Hilton (which is across the street)
- eventually we get 2 taxis, me and the girls in one, M and his parents in the other, I have no idea where we're going; quick stop to drop off luggage at hotel; then we're driving frantically somewhere. Taxi drops us off, M is across the street talking to the tour bus operator at 2:30 pm exactly
- we get on the tour bus, turns out others were later than us

- tour of Milan's Teatro alla Scala, get to see view of stage from box seats
- tour of Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II, here is 2nd in the world's 7 star hotel
- tour of the Duomo across the street
- impressive more than 3500 statues, especially skinless one of St. Bartolomew
- can see the marble in the columns (that have been restored)
- M & C miss out on tour of Duomo because C is starving so M feeds her an ice cream outside
- hop back on tour bus

- drive to Castello Sforzesco(tour operator notes there aren't many public parks but if you look inside buildings, you catch glimpses of private courtyard gardens)
- K and I have snack, didn't see Michelangelo's 3rd unfinsished Pietro since had to pay additional 3 Euro for entry and we were hungry; did see some baby kittens inside the fortress
- drive to churc of Santa Maria della Grazie, here we see the Last Supper by da Vinci. You need to book this type of tour in advance since only ~25 people are allowed in every 15 minutes during opening hours. I didn't realize this was such a large painting, that it's in a refectory (lunchroom for church), that it's painted directly on the wall and thus is falling apart, that it didn't mean so much to people since they built a huge arched doorway under the painting, cutting off the bottom of the painting (ie. can't see Jesus' feet).

- attempt to get to hotel via Subway, it is super packed, the doors barely close
- we opt for the taxi and return to the hotel to check in
- we dine in the hotel restaurant for convenience

July 10, 2009 - Friday
- take 4:00 am taxi to Milan airport, catch 6:__ am flight to Paris CDG
- go to another terminal for quick bite
- take 10:50 am flight to Chicago
- arrive at Chicago O'Hare, go to terminal 2 to Hilton, see baby bunnies on the lawn
- have swim in the pool
- dinner in the hotel restaurant. Originally we thought we might to downtown but we're just exhausted. We all fall asleep after dinner

July 11, 2009 - Saturday
- leave hotel at 6:09 am for 7:09 am flight to San Francisco
- arrive home before noon

girls are now happily playing with their toys in their very familiar home
I hear a bunch of ... Prego ...
they are happy
My shoulders are aching
They slept until 4am this morning, hope we all are ok going back to regular schedule this Monday.

Venice - July 2009

2009-07-12T08:57:00.000-07:00

July 5, 2009 Sunday

- take bus from Veneto airport to Venice bus station (very hot)
- take vaporetto to Zaterre stop

- meet apartment manager, go to apartment across closest bridge

- M & I get groceries at Billa, difficult to find, no awning/sign that sticks out
- walk to Campo Santa Margherita, dinner at Intranso? sloooow service but excellent food
- oriechetti pasta with zucca (pumpkin) – E
- pasta with butter and parmesan – girls
- ensalada caprese - all share
- antipasti plate with thin meat purse with delicious green cream filling (I cannot eat beef carpaccio, the idea is revolting to me)
- gelato in the campo (how is it there's constantly running water at some pump-life fountains, isn't it wasteful? fyi, dogs drink from there so I don't know if you'd want to)
- many groups of people kept walking past us during dinner, wondering where they were going since it was in the not that touristy area

July 6, 2009 - Monday

- vaporetto to San Giorgio, too late, the church closed after we stepped in

- vaporetto over to S. Zaccaria

- walk over to P. San Marco
- many booths and stores selling exquisite masks but I'm uncertain how to carry it back as gifts
- K whines about wanting to feed pigeons (there aren't as many pigeons as I recalled from our 2000 trip) but we don’t have any bread with us (no longer have people selling corn per M)
- walk over to Rialto to Ristorante Omnibus,

- C & K very hungry so we grab large pieces of pizza for them en-route
- E & C go to ATM while rest wait for waiter (my ATM card worked just this once, it no longer worked later, bank said I needed to sign some overseas form before the trip but I was denied thrice again)
- liver & onions and grilled vegetables – E
- K & C were occupied feeding pigeons and fish (in canal) during meal

- walk over Rialto, can feel sun burning into my bare back shoulders
- find pharmacy for medicine for K's bites on her feet/ankles (green cross)
- looked at shops in cooler (shaded by tall buildings) small streets of San Polo
- during trip saw many purse shops, all operated by Asian people, wonder if same people owned all these particular shops that sold the same type of purses in the touristy areas

- tried to get to S. Silvestro vaporetto stop since it's about 2pm now but it was under construction
- ended up taking gondola back to apartment from Rio di San Polo
- the ride is very peaceful through the canals
- the gondolier tried to explain to us in English the different types of buildings we were going past
- he returned us to, Rio di San Trovaso from our apartment, turns out were were staying at one of the areas where they repair gondolas
- we did some laundry in the apartment (only had washer and drying rack, takes over 24 hours to dry on the rack indoors under AC fan so we just did laundry once)

- M & I go to Billa again and make dinner for the evening
- that evening we take the vaporetto back to S. Zaccaria for some drinks in the Piazza, K - limone float, E - strawberry margarita, free nuts and chips, M - , C - sprite
- listened to the small orchestra/band. Turns out the better music came from the next Cafe but the Piazza was a bit flooded and ours was the only one that put out a plank to cross the water with
- walked to Rialto stop and took #1 to Accademia bridge and walked back to apartment

July 7, 2009 - Tuesday
- in-laws go to St. Mark's Basilica tour
- we take the girls to a playground across from the Bus Station at P.le Roma, while M checks out the train station
- hear other American families at the playground; there are many American tourists in Venice
- we walk over the new bridge to Ferrovia (train) station (K melt down)
- take vaporetto to Rialto, saw a glimpse of Rialto Mercato stop en route, like a big farmer's market, note: check that out next time, looks like they were closing up around 12:15 pm

- meet up with in-laws in Piazza San Marco for lunch, can see it's about to storm
- duck into a nearby restaurant for lunch and watch people in the rain through the window
- K is not doing well, her ankles are swollen, she's complaining a lot (C doesn't complain so much because often M is carrying her on this trip). I though K was complaining about her bites. We asked specially for some ice to numb her itchiness, but apparently she was complaining from walking all day for ~7 days in a row. I didn't realize this until my feet gave up on me the next day. Poor girl really was a good sport throughout the trip.
- I take K out while rest finish up lunch (C - ravenous with her cheese pizza, E - spaghetti fruita di mare, rest - full meal plan) and we try to walk around but she claims she is slipping on the wet ground so we hold each other around the waist. I let go of her at some point thinking she was being over-dramatic and she slips and falls. I realize her Old Navy flip flops are smooth on the bottom. Thinking of getting her croc flip flops next time, they worked well for me for all our trips this year: not slippery and my knees/feet don't hurt after lots of walking.
- I let her feed the pigeons outside the restaurant

- everyone finishes with lunch, about 2pm, girls are melting down again, I'm melting down since I've been wanting to see something but we just keep dragging these whiny kids around with us

- M and in-laws go back to apartment with girls, I go to Doge's Palace alone
- there is a free very clean restroom here
- M's often pointed out the bridge of sighs (Ponti dei Sospiri), I was wondering when I would see it (it's near the end of the self-guided route)
- the inner court yard of the Doge's Palace is just steps from the crowds of the P. San Marco but when you're inside, you're like a world away
- kinda creepy walking amongst the prison cells so I followed closely a group of italian women in front of me

- I walk along the Grand Canal and duck into cooler Frezzeria street to window-shop. See beautiful things in shop windows but with the exchange rate dollar::euro is 1::1.5, no dice.
- Looking for a cold beverage. Finally find affordable drink and bag of ~20 Burano misto cookies in a bakery shop Calle del Fabbri (all for under 5 Euro, vs 2-3 Euro for can of soda in touristy kiosk)
- sat against shady column in Piazza, some guy tries to pick me up, just pretended I didn't speak English and ignored him
- ya gotta be on guard, people are watching you since when K was feeding the pigeons earlier that day, suddenly some street vendor comes up and forces us to buy this 1 Euro toy (puts it in K's hands and asks for 1 Euro), turns out I bought one for the girls the day before and K broke hers the nite by pulling too hard so it was serendipitous but also creepy that someone targetted us out in a crowd too)

- M mentioned my Doge's Palace ticket also allowed me access to one other museum so I go to Museo Correr since I also wanted to go into one of the buildings surrounding the P. San Marco
- awesome old globes
- see that locals have free access to Venetian museums
- in general many palaces (ducales) are being turned into museums so there's a lot of renovation happening in Venice. In a way this is nice for tourist (like a huge adult theme park) but this also means many locals are getting pushed out because they can't afford to live here anymore

- I then meet M at 5:30pm under the P. San Marco clock tower
- we go up the Campanile to see the view of Venice, watch the clock tower bell statues strike 6:00pm (M says one status strikes 2 minutes before the hour and the other status strikes 2 minutes after the hour, he was hoping to see the Campanile bells ring when we were up there, I don't think they do that when people are up there, we'd all be deaf)

- walk along the water until we see one of the artist M's known for many years and say hi and have a mini chat, then we rest awhile in the nearby park at Vallaresso San Marco and snack again
- we walk among the shops behind the Doge's palace (there's a book shop that sells fiction books in English) and end up at the Danieli Hotel. I suggest let's just go for it and have dinner there. The decor in the hotel is unique. The view from the terrace dining is lovely. There are men in suits dining alone or with others. The menu has no prices. We leave with feelings misto.

- we take the vaporetto from S. Marco across to Salute, then walk around the Pointe (there's a white statue of a naked boy holding out a frog there)
- we walk on the other side of Dorsoduro > see a modern restorant, Linea dombra, note: maybe try this place next time > all the way back to Zaterre (requested to take a pic of a happy American couple along the way) and have dinner along the water at a ristorante next to Gelateria Nico (service is quick and friendly)
- pacakged bread sticks, start with risotto, E - chicken with eggplant and olives (moist)
- the waves can be pretty high there, we saw many huge cruise ships go by the days before, there's a lovely view
- we tried to figure out the boat shuttle to the new Hilton at Molino Stucky since we wanted to check out the renovated flour mill but we don't since we no longer saw the red shuttle after awhile and returned to the apartment

July 8, 2009 - Wednesday
- walk from apartment to Accademia vaporetto stop, take bus boat to Rialto to visit another of M's acquaintances at Ristorante Omnibus

- walk over to Scala Contarini del Bovolo, M thought it was open to the public, it's not but seems to be in line for renovation
- we pick up some turkish delights at a bakery (across from Burger King) C. Del Fusiri in some busy square
- C needs to pee, I recall some WC signs, we follow them quite a ways and are discouraged whenever we don't see the WC nor next sign. Eventually we find it - 1.50 Euro to enter

- take vaporetto from S. Zaccharia to the Lido island
- strange to see cars again since there are no cars in Venice
- stop when whining starts at a ristorante under a tent
- walk to the other side of the island to the beach (I have a mini tantrum from the heat)
- eventually I rejoin my family, girls are picking up tons of shells
- find bus back to vaporetto, us girls fall asleep on the way back to the apartment, I crash in bed
- M makes dinner for the girls, in-laws have dinner alone in ristorante

London July 2009 - part II

2009-07-11T15:52:00.001-07:00

July 3, 2009 Friday
- 8:30 breakfast in hotel with in-laws
- MIL and I take girls to Harrod's for shopping, (don't expect to do much (any personal) shopping with 2 girls) while men go to London Dungeon
- Euston: Northern line south to Leicester (pronounced lester) > Picadilly line west to Knightsbridge, follow signs to Harrods, come up and there you are
- C is whining for water. Usually I'm lugging at least one bottle of water in my purse all day with me but not at this moment (typical isn't it?) I am also lugging 2 umbrellas and sweaters for everyone since it's supposed to storm (but it never did)
- finally find bottles of water in Harrod's shops maze, C doesn't want to look around the beautiful displays of food since water was in the sea food section and she claimed it smelled
- walked up Egyptian themed stairs, look around at next level (expensive designer clothes, couple hundred pounds each), walk up another level, see children's is on 4? go there and end up in toy section
- we basically spent our entire time at Harrod's on the children's floor looking at toys, there are demo areas to try some toys out, good for kids
- they have a space themed children's restaurant where we had lunch when the kids were hungry, it was remarkable the number of people who work there

- the girls wanted stuffed animals so that's what I got them, big micro-beaded stuffed animals, not good for packing away since you can't squish them. They saw Peppa Pig that morning so that's what she calls her pink pig. After the purchase, it was all downhill, K had to go to to the loo, difficult to find, then we saw there's a live pet store and looked at the kittens and bunnies, C was melting down, about time to get back to the hotel so we returned to the hotel
- saw beautiful children clothes, dresses (under 200 pounds), wondered what kind of children shopped here (not mine), ran past adorable ice cream sundae parlor and counter eating areas on the way out of Harrod's (yes, need to teach girls not to be brats and drive our lives)

- that evening the in-laws graciously took our girls to the movies (Ice Age III in 3D) while M and I had date nite
- dinner at a tapas restaurant in glass mall along Victoria St.

- they had an open air area on 2nd floor where many were on the grass watching a big screen of Wimbledon tennis, I noticed cheering coming from that area so we rode up the escalator to check it out
- coffee at ___
- wore heels, walked a lot (0.5 mile near Victoria station by mistake), should've just wore flip flops with my dress like many other women
- M bought tickets for Wicked at Apollo Victoria Theatre 2 weeks before, picked up at will-call

- saw other whole families with little kids there
- didn't realize this musical wasn't all about the green witch, 50%? about the 'good witch'
- my view was influenced since my MIL saw it already and said it reminded her of Reese Witherspoon in Legally Blonde, after seeing it I understand why
- they sold ice cream cups at intermission in the theater, the spoons are under the peel away lid top, not under the lid as I saw a yuppy family looking under the lid for the spatula spoon. People sitting next to us peeled the top off the lid so I knew where it was. Almost felt sorry for the family who couldn't eat their ice cream but alas their tween daughter figured it out, yay.
- theater was packed, cannot understand how London can have so many shows every nite and most are probably packed like ours, amazing, it really is a big city. I thought about the many women walking past us at dinner, wondering how do foreigners make it in a big city like this, do they feel lonely? do they just meet people/strangers?

- back down to Victoria Station, took Victoria line to Picadilly Circus (I wasn't as thrilled with the Times Square feel as M wanted me to be), walked along Regent Street, noticed a very convex building on our right, like a coliseum, what was it?found Heddon alley, very busy and happening alley, then to the Absolut ice bar.

- M made reservations with our concierge that afternoon for 11pm (need reservations, $15 per person for 36 minutes in the ice bar, 1st drink comes with cover charge).
- I wanted the drink with 3 layers I saw others had, but we couldn't figure out what it was. I started with a guava drink. Think there's a special ice bar drinks menu (can't find my drink online)
- we wondered if our lips would freeze onto the ice glasses, they don't

- I saw other come out with just a skimpy spaghetti strapped dress. I had my bulky wool sweater under the Narnia like cape from the ice bar (fyi, there are gloves attached to the cape so you can pick up your ice glass), my feet started to get cold so we left after about 20 minutes. That was quite memorable though I was resistant to go there (don't ask)
- walked along Regent St some more to Oxford Circus station > Victoria line back to Euston station
- walked in hotel room to in-laws sitting in the dark next to the door and were told the girls fell asleep at 11:30pm (???) they had dinner at the hotel since kids are free

July 4, 2009 Saturday
- breakfast at 9:30 with in-laws due to late nite for everyone
- we split up since in-laws had date with friends to see Billie Elliot and dinner/drinks afterwards
- M & I took girls from Euston station Victoria line to Oxford Circus > Circle line to Queensway station > up to Kensington gardens
- we picked up some food and drinks at the M&S Simply Food in Euston station (small packets of ready to eat grapes, bag of brioche, drinks, should've picked up sandwich meats too)
- we went to the large, multi play area: Princess Diana memorial Playground at Kensington Gardens, the girls had fun,

we secured bench seats in a covered area. It started to rain and everyone ran for cover where we were at. The rain stopped in about 15 minutes.

- we walked to the Round Pond where K fed the birds & swans
- I walked C around in the stroller, she fell asleep, saw there was some event at Kensington Palace

- I like the continuous architecture of buildings

- walked out to Queen's Gate Road > Prince Consort Rd > Exhibition Road > into the free Museum of Natural History, not realizing this wasn't the main entrance (love free museums)
- went up the escalator through a planet's core (red zone)

- saw many amazing fossils, large gemstone collection, learned a little about marble

- felt the strong need to produce less garbage on this earth, in search of the much publicized Butterly exhibit (even though we saw the best one at Marine World in Vallejo in May and some at the Academy of Sciences in SF in June). Didn't realize this museum was so huge, thought it was only the red zone, couldn't find the other zones.
- M helped us to find the insect and stuffed birds section (Green Zone), impressive bird specimens. K made a paper butterfly craft in the insect section. We found a cafeteria here and stopped for lunch, there's a large underground 'picnic' area, where we finally woke C up.

- Next was the spectacular Central Hall but I was getting tired (1.7 miles so far?) and was impatient about finding this Butterfly Jungle exhibit. Turns out it was in a tent outside and you had to pay for admission. I should've said no and continued with the dinosaur bone exhibit but I just wanted to get over it. It wasn't anything the girls and I haven't seen before but M missed the other 2 butterfly exhibits so it was exciting for him to experience. There was also a mini playground for the girls.
- notice from the outside that the Natural History museum is in a striking building

- go directly underground to South Kensington station (some very enthusiastic banjo musician playing 'who's go rhythm, who's got style, ... who could ask for anything more!!!' so I danced part way with little C) to Victoria station to Westminster Chapel which we noticed at dinner the nite before

- go up the tower at Westminster Chapel

- here's a pic of the largest nave domes from above, I was walking C quietly through the stages of the cross but we were interrupted by M to go up to the tower before it closed

- there is a pretty good view of the city from up here.

- Pigeons in front for K
- got in a bit of a riff with K here (another missing afternoon snack/dinner melt down), go to grocery store across the street, but she was upset that her grapes were smooshed. Finally got her OK by doing I count how many people wearing flip flops you count how many people not. turns out about 25% of people where flip flops.
- tried to find subway station to go to Chinatown, C needs to pee badly now. Saw a subway station in an alley across from a Starbuck's on some very quiet streets. but station was closed (ack!), somehow get from St. James' Park station to Chinatown at Leicester Square (very crowded here)
- found a clean looking chinese restaurant on Gerard Street (C finally got to pee) and got dinner. Bought some 3 person fixed menu dinner. Must've been pretty good cuz we ate a lot.
- followed many signs that said Covent Garden .25 miles away to Covent Garden. They had ice cream, many people there, reminded me of My Fair Lady.
- went to some subway station and back to Euston Square

July 4, 2009 Sunday - leave London
- 8:45 am breakfast with in-laws
- 10:00 am van shuttle to Gatwick airport, lot of driving on streets, saw some lovely homes with mini fortresses around them
- got on British Airways plane to Venice, walking past first class seats, someone points in front of me and exclaims, that's Caitlin! I'm thinking is there some movie star or someone famous in front of me named Caitlin? How coincidental since my daughter is Caitlin and is a few persons in front of me. Turns out it's a mom from her preschool and she points to her son and says he loves my C, small world I tell ya. much excitement for that day.

London - July 2009 - part I

2009-07-11T12:24:00.000-07:00

London Highlights

- Look Right, Look Left: you can seriously get run over, though cars do seem to obey stopping at red lights, they may not stop if you're incorrectly crossing at green nor slow down when turning into side streets, that's where we almost got run over, little C & I

- there are a LOT of people everywhere at all times of the day, really puts into perspective that the big city (San Francisco), I grew up in is actually very very small compared to London

- Way Out signs in subway (vs Exit in US or Sortie in Paris)

- 8 year old K just wants to feed the pigeons everywhere we go (remember to carry bread with you even if it may not be allowed, that's all she wants to do + eat ice cream)

- subways are very frequent, about 2-4 minutes between trains except watch out on weekends, lots of maintenance so stations may be skipped

- restrooms in Europe are very private, either it's individual room or barely any space above/below the doors (compared to US stalls)

June 30, 2009 Tuesday nite
- red eye flight from SFO to London Heathrow

July 1, 2009 Wednesday
- take airport subway to Paddington with ~3 stops (save ~2/3 money vs taking direct Express to Paddington; time-wise I think you take 10 minutes longer to get there)

- from Paddington, take cab to hotel at Euston station, can seat up to 6, 3 regular back seats and 3 fold down backward-facing seats. For us, it just fit 4 + 4 pieces of luggage + umbrella stroller

- settle in our hotel room for ~an hour (love the full floor to ?~ 15ft ceiling windows)
- I shower to freshen up
- noticed my conjunctiva has completely dried up and is doing an accordian like fold, very scary to discover this in a foreign country upon arrival

- go to Euston Square subway station and take Circle line > Tower Hill station
- come up from the station and see castle across the busy freeway: Tower of London
- not what I expect since I didn't know this was M's destination
- not like the castle that I've seen in movies, across a busy modern highway
- it's very hot
- get some ice cream cones for the girls and water for the adults

- it's about closing time for the Tower, M is starving, he gets a sandwich, Cate and I later see there's a Subway and Starbuck's nearby. The girls favor Subway but this Subway is not like the ones in the US - no mayo, no white bread
- we walk around the gift shop, check out the cruise booths for info

- walk down along the Thames (Petty Wales > Lower Thames > Waterman's Walk > London Bridge, try to get on subway at Monument > can't find entrace > see signs and get on at Bank station > take Northern line back to Euston station

- I feel seriously ill upon returning to the hotel and crash
- M goes to pick up his parents from Heathrow after ordering from room service for the girls (turns out we had 2 pre-paid dinners with our accomodations)
- I had the biggest headache and dry heaves and just sleep until morning

July 2, 2009 Thursday
- 8:30 am free buffet breakfast (came with room for each morning) with the in-laws
- what is that black patty with no label next to the mushy sausage (is it not cooked) Is it the famed British blood sausage? don't know but tried some

- get on the Hop on Hop off double decker red bus a few blocks from hotel, kinda difficult to find where to get on
- got front seats on the covered half of the top deck, great view, really helps you see everything you normally would miss at car/walking level, ie. I spot a grocery store near our hotel, make note for later
- have to hand it to these bus drivers, have no idea how they handle the narrow streets but they're obviously professionals at driving

- ~10:20/30 am, hop off at Trafalgar Square, take some pics, see men jumping off of the lion statues (some type of extreme sport?)
- walk through Pall Mall (neglected shot of awesome Pall Mall gate), stop at kiosk in St. James Park to get some water (2 pounds each, note much cheaper at grocery type store, maybe even 30 pence each)
- Goal, see changing of the guards at 11:00am.
- Notice volunteer educational garden with various vegetables in St James park. M rushes us so we won't miss changing of the guards. note: Next time spend more time here to read all the plant labels.

- K asks for ice cream. I got K to agree to wait for ice cream when we stop, thinking not a good idea (messy) if we're walking. In-laws tired, stop a few times to rest. K enjoys looking at all the water fowl. K asks at 2nd kiosk for ice cream. Again I deny. (had cool cones here - regular single cone bottom that splits into 2 mini cones with side-by-side mini scoops of ice cream).
- there are these sling back chairs at both St. James and Kensington Gardens, M discovered at Kensington Gardens a man will tell him it costs 2 pounds to lounge in these chairs

- arrive at Victoria Memorial circle in front of Buckingham Palace with time to spare. Should've gotten ice cream for K since we have to wait ~10 more minutes

- start walking back to Thames along Birdcage Walk after changing of the guards parade, there is band music and how do they all wear those outfits in this extreme heat
- quick photos of Westminster Abbey, very complicated looking architecture
- is super hot now

- M is rushing to get us on some cruise, K is melting down fast because it's lunch time, she just walked under 2 miles (pushing C in the stroller cuz she thinks it's fun) and we haven't gotten her ice cream though she politely asked twice. When she melts down, she just keeps repeating what she wants with increasing urgency and cannot stop.
- Again we're rushing to get on the cruise boat (free with our particular Hop On Hop Off bus ticket), 10 minutes before the cruise leaves. M rushes off the boat to get hot dogs for the girls at the dock. Only have soda and chips on boat snack bar
- note to self: should've gotten ice cream the first 2 times K asked for it.
- take boat to Tower of London, M wants to continue on for 2 hours round trip. C is getting motion sick, I suggest we get off and get real lunch

- have lunch at the Wagamama (very dark rest rooms) outside Tower of London, I didn't think the food was that great. M's been raving about this place for months.
- I keep asking when can we go to the Tower of London, but apparently M now wants to walk across Tower Bridge. His mom doesn't think she can make it. We diverge last minute since it's again very hot, get back on hop on hop off (very hot downstairs, no AC, very hot upstairs, bus is full and only seats are in direct sun), but we speed up at some point and get a mild breeze from the tiny windows.
- get off at Westminster, now we're rushing to get on the London Eye since C fell asleep (don't have to deal with motion sickness on her part). Turns out the tickets we bought for the Eye on the hop on hop off is just a voucher, M needs to swap them for real tickets, we wait.
- alas we get on the London Eye. I stay in my seat, afraid to lose my seat and afraid of heights. You really don't feel the Eye moving. I'd be interested in hearing how they engineered the ride over the top. It's an experience to say you've been on it.
- K and Big Ben

- K took lots of pics from the eye, here's one of the Aquarium or the building next to it. I find crescent architecture interesting, how they remain over time

- near the end of the ride you can stand at a spot and the Eye will take a picture of you for purchase if you want
- half an our later, get off the Eye and search for slushy drink nearby, very hot
- M wants to take subway back to hotel, it's about 5pm, I suggest subway would be very crowded (we experienced this the day before), that we should get on hop on hop off and return to the hotel. Would've taken an hour. Could not distinguish which hop on hop off goes west in direction of our hotel, so attempt to find Waterloo station which seemed to be 'around the corner'. We follow the signs, walk under very dusty construction area through creepy tunnel, see the train tracks above but can't find the station.
- we attempt to get a taxi from other side of tunnel, in-laws are fed up, finally we see a subway sign (1.12 miles later), don't remember which but I'm guessing Southwark. We take Jubilee line to Waterloo and switch to Northern line to Euston. (best to change to destination line as early as possible to get seats, especially during rush hour)
- back at hotel (Hilton at Euston), since we have 2nd pre-paid dinner and too tired to go out again, we have dinner at the hotel restaurant. Their food is excellent. I had salmon terrine and _(I forgot)_, C had chicken nuggets and something with smashed peas (yum, though a bit crude).
- I notice many people sitting alone, I ask M if this is what it's like for him to travel for work so often though he usually has dinner with coworkers or his suppliers. Looks lonely, I feel drawn to sit with a woman who keeps eyeing our table of 6 with 2 little restless girls. She ends up talking on the cell through her main course. note: I should be more inclined to speak with M when he calls from his trips, I'm usually annoyed since I'm busy holding down the fort while he tells me about the latest site he's visited. So he no longer calls.

good weekend June 09

2009-06-28T10:50:00.000-07:00

K had her first sleepover this weekend. I was hesitant to let her go but she's really been wanting to go on a sleepover. She hears about it from her school friends and cousin. I suppose she's curious.

It was with our church group and so we let her. Friday nite the group met. You can see she wasn't really thinking about us. She was looking forward to leaving with the other kids. The girls would be in a bedroom, the boys in backyard tents. I bid her farewell.

I felt this protective mother attachment when we arrived home with just one little girl. She was very chatty in the car, talking about her day. She went to bed alone in K's larger bed and slept well through the nite.

Saturday, little C had her own group activity so we dropped her off. We also dropped off the bunny.

M and I then had a rare day alone together. We didn't really plan anything. It was super hot when we left San Mateo and completely foggy in SF. We ended up having brunch at the Cliff House. Then we started walking along the Land's End trail. Next thing we knew, we were at the front door of the Legion of Honor so we got some tickets and went in. There were no crowds due to the opening of the King Tut exhibit that same day. We enjoyed a leisurely visit joined at the hip. (wish we didn't have to carry purses, why are they so heavy)

One of my favorite pieces there has been The Bath by Jean-LÈon GÈrome. What strikes me is not the contrast between the bather and the bathed but the contrast between the light infused bathed and the turquoise walls, very warm and cool on the same canvas.

The sun burned off all the fog. We were able to sip a cup of herbal tea and share an apricot/pistachio cookie unbothered in the quiet breezy outdoor area of the museum cafe. Then we completed our 2.5 mi round trip walk via Clement St back to the parking lot. Took advantage of the clear view of the ocean before heading out. (don't remember what we were looking at other than the ruins of the Sutro baths and some rocks since someone was more interested in looking at eyes).

mini-mission: We needed to find a replacement suitcase since the zipper failed during the last family trip in April. We stopped at Burlington Coat Factory in the renovated West Lake area. It may have been renovated awhile ago but we don't frequent that mall. Mission accomplished. Why does shopping leave one parched? Snack stop at Sheng Kee Bakery.

I wanted to bring K home even though her sleepover was for 2 nites. We went to visit them at their at Rockaway Beach in Pacifica. She seemed to be having a good time with her 2 friends, A & B. We chatted with the rest of the chaperones and left daughter #1 with muddied socks building a sandcastle. She did stand up with wide open arms for a goodbye hug and motherly love on her satiny cheeks. (the chaperones took pictures of whales off the coast of that beach)

It was time to return to daughter #2 who was preparing dinner with her group. That was an unexpected event, to have time with the other parents who may also have had dates that day if both their kids were with the same groups our 2 kids were with.

The little ones were learning about manners so they served us and there wasn't much fighting/yelling because no sibling rivalry with many of the siblings split up, how smart.

What a blessed day. Not really any planning on our part. Lots of planning by the group leaders. Very successful for the entire family.

group of words 1

2009-05-24T00:51:00.000-07:00

Anger and frustration

Does anger stem from frustration?
Frustration from lack of communication and an abundance of internalizing behind the veil of acceptance?

Is there an appropriate amount of acceptance per person? Is it 50/50 or more, does more = gracious or in the short run = self-appeasing?

Anger is definitely a nondesirable reaction by the giver and the receiver. The source is not exposed. The receiver is hurt. With a partial explanation of the outburst is anything achieved? Only the temporary explanation of what initiated the action. The victim is not the true target, just an innocent bystander caught in the unintentional invisible crossfire.

Relationships always have chips and tears. ... What happens to it in 10,20,30 years, is it obvious to the outsider?

People endure a lot of unneeded pain. In the end for something really not worth it. It's amazing the amount of hope we have.

If I can't save myself, I can at least hopefully make it better for my future. Of course the damage is done but there's time and undying hope, God willing. Per my group, there's always the possibility of a miracle.

may 2009

2009-05-24T00:38:00.000-07:00

I haven't been feeling the need to blog, thus the silence.

Lately however I've been feeling the need to write. More in terms of just to capture feelings, events, moments into words. I feel it will also take revisions and I don't have the time or bandwidth to begin.

There've been a lot of work projects taking up bandwidth. Desire to put the girls on some schedule/purpose so they'll fight less. Lately they've just been at each other and it's very difficult to abate.

I've been driven by Shelfari to read. In the books I've been reading, there have been lines I just want to underline and remember or to expand my own thoughts upon. But in seconds, the words are forgotten, only a glimmering that a group of inspirational words had entered my mind.

Current: physical ailments - why choose a lifestyle that only harms your body? Many people complain of stomach pains. Sometimes the answer isn't that complicated but hard to do.

Jan weekend 2009

2009-02-02T20:14:00.000-08:00

I finally had one of those tortuous dental appts on Saturday. I had a molar extracted. The original intent was to redo a 10+ year old filling but apparently it's in a challenging position. I figured the dentist was either going to punch a hole out of my right cheek to try to reach/drill/fill. So to make it easier for everyone we decided to extract it. It was like a torture movie. I couldn't help but compare it to child-birth. I think I almost wanted to do the child-birth. So stressful to be under duress for so long.

The day started nicely since I had an afternoon appt. I went with Kayla to the library. During the week, I saw she had a take home frog from school to write about in a shared class journal. So I looked up the frog and toad author and since we couldn't find that book at the library, we got some of his other books.

We saw some birds outside a downtown San Mateo flower shop. She wanted to go in so we did. We bought some cards and I got a mini vase of fresh cut white flowers as a parting gift. It felt so vintage Hollywood to be shopping with a small white vase. The flowers were a bit stinky. We went to a yarn shop, a mystery book shop, the Japanese 1.25 store, and the ravioli shop (which also has gelato).

I sometimes really enjoy 1:1 time with my daughter. She's growing up so quickly.

On Sunday M and I did a quick hike to Coit Tower since we were nearby. I don't recall ever ascending the tower so M said we should. We did. It was a clear blue day, not too hot, not requiring a sweater, just right. From above I saw this flock of green birds flying in formation and thought it unusual. Later M pointed out they looked like parrots. That jogged my memory since last year I read a fictional book about these Telegraph Hill wild parrots. We descended and just sat there in the warmth staring at these parrots, wondering why we've never noticed them before. Maybe we just assumed the bird sounds were familiar sea gulls/pigeons, nothing special? Are they seasonal?

You really must get a top down view of these parrots flying in formation.

I will say again that I think spring is my favorite time of year. Something about between V-day and Easter that is just renewing, hopeful, new life. There are no promises but the possibility is also sweet for whatever it's worth.

I rejoined my b-study group after 2+ years away. It's meant Wed nites of big dinners so far.

mother's wish-ality

2008-12-14T12:15:00.000-08:00

I look at some blogs and think of my daughters when they grow up, particularly Kayla rather than Cate since Cate is still the baby and cannot be related to a single woman.

I wish for Kayla

friends, friends, ... friends
- to share daily life with
- to share meals with
- to celebrate birthdays with
- to grieve losses with
- to share with
mundane-ity, personal-ity, private feelings, fears, joys, life- ality
so that she will not be held down by overwhelming-ality

I wish for both girls
- open-ness, communicate-iveness, laughter, ability to let go-iveness, levity
so that they can love and be loved

I wish for both girls knowledge of the Spirit
- for peace
- for strength
- for life
so that they can understand

Mostly but not utterly, I want them to remember the love of their parents. No matter if they will resent us, for many of our mistakes will fall on them, we love them whole-heartedly even if imperfectly.

dec 2008

2008-12-08T21:35:00.000-08:00

It's almost the end of 2008.

snippets

Since September, Cate no longer has naps at school. By the end of the week, she typically will fall asleep pretty much for the nite by 6:30. I've been enjoying that time alone with Kayla. We watch Jon & Kate + 8.

KAyla likes to fix hair. It reminds me of when I was home with the girls in 2005. Cate would go down for her afternoon nap. Kayla and I would watch some craft show on HGTV and she'd like to fix my hair.

sweet

It's interesting how going from 2 to 1 kid to be available for seems like a 'vacation'.

I long for treasured moments that are ephemeral.

Sometimes Cate will stay up because she's had a long late afternoon/early evening nap. She's very adorable, talkative, sweet, huggable. Last nite M needed us to be quiet since he had an early flight to Europe. I gave Cate a long good nite hug but she cried so I slept next to her until she fell asleep. When I got up to leave, she looked at me and waved her sleepy arm to say good-bye.

Kayla got a bob cut recently. Her skin is soft and luminous. Her hair is so shiny (without the knots that come with long tangled hair). I gaze at the even bottom edge that just hugs her chin and forms a nice line along her neck. I watch her brush her hair and then I put a clip to cover her feathers. Her hair falls in a layered drape from the clip.

What are her feathers you ask. Soon after she got her haircut (long story short), she got gum in her hair ... I ended up cutting a big chunk from the height of her crown ... thus the feathers she wants to hide since she's now self-conscious about how she looks.

On the other hand, she prefers comfort in terms of clothing over looks. She'll wear baggy t-shirts, not wanting to tuck anyting in because it feels very uncomfortable to her.

Cate is still little.

I sometimes see what I think I look like in Kayla except I think she is so beautiful. Of course there are just as many time where I think she just looks weird. She is the spunky carefree child of a girl I've always hoped for.

Cate is the cuddly doll of a girl I've always needed.

I try to cuddle Kayla but she's too long / bony / and she seems to have accepted her lack of cuddling from all these years. I want her to remember something of it so I try (before she's as tall as me).

wife

being a wife shouldn't be difficult but it is. I don't feel as self-absorbed/easily guilty as before. I have a lot to work on here.

commuter

I commute ~10 hours a week.

I'm grateful to have a job to show up at. I'm grateful the coworkers here accept me as I am and do not criticize me. I'm grateful that it's relatively peaceful at work.

I truly am. It may be just a phase but I'll take it.

what's happening in this world?

I have a premonition of travel and danger or is that just watching the news at all.

I hope for the safe return of my life mate.

sonoma 2008

2008-08-04T09:16:00.000-07:00

Two Saturdays ago, we went to Sonoma Train Town. It was a 90+F day. There's a little train ride that stops in a small-scale town you can wander around in. Then there were rides for the kids. M enjoyed seeing the round-house for the trains.

Afterwards we visited Sonoma downtown.
- gelato and cheese cube tasting at Sonoma Cheese Factory, it's a gourmet grocery store if you wanted to pick up items for a picnic-type lunch since there's a huge square across the street with a playground for the kids
- coffee at some hotel/restaurant/cafe on a corner
- lots of interesting gift shops to peruse
- saw some baby kittens up for adoption
- candy store with many vintage candies, sweet treats, toys and items of that sort
- dinner at Mary's Pizza Shack, very clean, kid friendly, tasty pizza, great basic mozarella

It was an overall relaxing day

new hampshire - july 2008

2008-07-27T18:03:00.000-07:00

1. Canobie Lake Park in Salem, NH - Kayla rode most rides with cousin D, chaperoned by Aunt K
2. Canobie Lake Park - lil Cate spent most of the day with Mama, she was a bit of a fuss-bucket; Dada rode big rides with Uncle J
3. New England porch life, we don't have this enclosed outdoor room in California
4. the younger cousins dressed for grandma's 70th surprise birthday party at the Back Room, super yummy honey fried chicken tips
- I enjoyed conversing with 93 years young Mary F, she is as energetic and sharp-minded as people half her age, even 1/3 of her age; her wit was super-entertaining
- overall it was perfect that the 3 cousins got to spend time everyday playing together for a week; it lessens arguments when you play with cousins vs just your sibling
5. Kayla shucking corn with grandpa and D
- we had a cold cuts dinner nite, a bunch of deli salads like crab salad, macaroni salad, potato salad, Italian pull apart bread (super soft and may be indigent to the neighborhood Hannaford's grocery store chain)
- many family meals on the porch: Sunday brunch; celebrate B & M's 21st wedding anniversary; lasagna nite; goodbye L;
6. Clark's Trading Post in Lincoln, NH
- the Seyranyan Family Circus was amazing; the strength and flexibility to do what they did - the hula hoops on a bunch of roly cylinders, fitting 2 women in a box, limbo under less than 1 foot of vertical clearance; truly amazing
- the bear show was interesting but that's also when the storm hit the park; we tried to stay under cover - one of the challenges of traveling in New England in the summer
7. Mt. Washington Resort in Bretton Woods, NH
- you almost feel like you've traveled back in time in such an old hotel
- the sunset was breath-taking, we should've enjoyed it instead of searching for drinks cuz when we returned, we just ended up sitting on the veranda in pitch black darkness, but it's all about the company you're with
- when life hands you limes and brown-edged mint, have a mojito and attempt to celebrate your 9th wedding anniversary because we find marriage is more fragile and vulnerable than ever but the choice of your spouse and history has some weight
- book of this trip was Love and Respect
8, 9. hike to Zealand Falls and Hut
- the White Mountains and 4K peakers is a piece of M's history; it was nice to share this with M as he's been meaning to hike this walk with me for quite awhile; we missed out last year so even though we experienced torrential storms the day before, I had a goal of making the hike this year
- note: should've kept the kiddie ponchoes we purchased at Clark's Trading Post the day before (sent home with kids and gramps); luckily the gentleman at the Bretton Woods Golf Club gave us 2 huge 5-feet tall garbage bags and those served us well in the rain we encountered.
- experienced fly bites, must've missed some spots with the Off Wipes; didn't know flies bite, but caught a few trying when sitting outside the hut, even attempting through my socks
- the self- running water, electricity, plumbing at the hut was quite impressive

Others
- Currier Museum of Art: I got to spend a quiet free Saturday morning exploring the exhibits and having a wonder cup of ginger peach tea in the roomy filtered sun-lit Winter Garden Cafe. There were the exquisite glass paper weights, the photo-like oil paintings of __(embarrassed I can't remember)__, ... I had quite a distraught nite and needed some space. Interestingly enough this middle aged man started speaking to me, I think he was trying to pick me up as I tried to politely walk away. The timing was impeccable in view of the events at the time.
- had a lunch with just my MIL, that went well
- lots of time with my husband, much needed dialogue, time alone together. I forget if I ever mentioned that I often say 'I don't recognize you', but suddenly through events I recognized him again and I needed to
- Hart's Turkey Farm dinner in Manchester, NH
- ours and K/J's anniversary dinner at Woodward's with the in-law's
- the ants in NH are gigantic
- we drove to Wellesley, MA and drove through many flooded streets
- there was a lot of thunder and lightning on this trip. We need rain in California badly. Summer rain is different than winter rain, it's still warm and you're not feeling the misery of winter but for that Wellesley road trip, I wouldn't have wanted to be walking on the streets with visibility ~5 feet in front of you.

pacific northwest trip july 08

2008-07-08T15:32:00.000-07:00

1-6: Tillicum Village, Blake Island, WA
7 - Miniature World, Victoria, BC
8-10: - Victoria Bug Zoo. Victoria, BC
11 - tree outside the Empress Hotel, Victoria, BC
12 - telephone booth, Victoria, BC
13 - Royal BC Museum, Victoria, BC
14 - self portrait by hotel elevator
15 - streets of Victoria: Trounce Alley
16 - Victoria Bug Zoo. Victoria, BC

We walked close to 10 miles during this trip. M carried C about 1/2 of it.

Sat 7/5/08
- catch 6:45am flight to Seattle
- checkin to Inn
- breakfast at McDonald's down at the wharf
- 11:00am board ferry to Blake Island, Tillicum Village
- 11:45 greeted by warm cup of clams in broth; noticed the walkway was made of crushed shells; felt awkward dumping my pile of shells into the ground (fear of littering in public)
- ushered into buffet style line and saw how they cooked the salmon (see #4 above); campy feeling with dining tables including pitchers of water and lemonade in very tall log cabin hall; you could get seconds if you wanted; ranch dressing makes everything taste better though the dark brown bread was soft and delicious on its own
- watched mini-show with real dancers about the history and culture of Seattle's native people, quite educational
- 2:30 pm walked a bit outside, then reboarded ferry to return to Seattle
- ~4:00 pm quick trip to Hilltop Yarn
- refreshments at Starbuck's in Queen Anne neighborhood
- nap at inn
- 6:30pm walk to space needle;
Kids played on merry go round, cars, small inflatable slide (C not tall enough for the big one, need to be 42");
saw a lady wearing the exact same sweater I was wearing, then noticed she was pointing at me to her 3 friends from a bench as I was pointing at her to Cate from the merry go round, how embarrassing but cool at the same time;
- 8:00pm dinner at the children's museum building, didn't realize all the vendors shut down at 8pm, only place left open was the pizza vendor
Spent some time in the space needle shop and arcade before heading back to inn
- advice: don't book inn next to 24 hour diner, not compatible around 1:00-2:00 am between customer noise and sleep

Sun 7/6/08
- catch 7:30am ferry to Victoria
- go through customs, walk to hotel, checkin
- 11:00am walk around downtown looking for lunch, was getting too late for the kids so just stepped into empty looking Fan Tan Cafe, vs crowded dim sum place across the street; large combo plates, quick service
looked like there was a Gay Pride parade or some event going on
- walked through a 1 block street fair, remembered we didn't have any canadian money on us
- visited Beehive yarn shop (excellent selection)
- walked to the needlepoint shop and checked out their yarn, not bad for a needlepoint shop
- checked out the Christmas store (in July and full prices), still almost got that feeling of the holidays they have so much stuff
- walked around aimlessly; saw this 66 flavor gelato place with huge scoops, thought I'd get a chance to go back later when I wasn't so full but didn't happen for me, too bad
- M took C back to the hotel for a nap; I took K to the Bug Zoo - tiny place but the guided tour is educational and entertaining and makes it last longer; I really liked the camouflagey plants (see #9, 10 above) one blends into an orchid and the other into leaves
- swap at the hotel, I napped with napping C and M took K out for ice cream and to check out the hotel, they won a prize by answering a questionnaire about the hotel (referred to by kids in the pool) and won a plate of cookies and milk
- all went to the miniature world, (I was reluctant to go see all these attractions but M insisted and I'm glad we got to see all these things). This place made me wish I knew more about history. There's just so much to see if you take the time to look at each diorama and the amount of detail and work and planning it took to create each one. Interestingly enough, K noticed where all the dogs were.
- dinner at the Spaghetti Factory, our first time. I enjoyed their chicken tenders.
- sadly I was too lazy to go out and observed the Parliament building lit up at night because it doesn't get dark until about 10pm and the girls were already bathed and in their jammies and I didn't want to go alone
- advice: 100 year old hotel will have low water pressure in the shower, even if the service and accomodations are superb

Mon 7/7/08
- breakfast at Smitty's, BIG plates
- obligatory visit to the wax museum
- some aimless walking until we decided to get refreshments at the 7Eleven and take it down by the wharf
- more aimless walking until I thought we should probably feed the girls again so we stopped at Willies Bakery
- there were many shops with cute items
- headed to the bookstore and picked up reading materials
- headed to National Geographic's IMAX to check their schedule. Lovely mom outside gave us her family's museum tickets so we were able to check out the museum. The Modern History Gallery is excellent, there's a replica of an entire town to walk through. The Natural History exhibits were so realistically breath-taking
- watched Dinosaur IMAX movie (I fell asleep after 5 minutes and missed the entire movie - I think I was getting too used to taking a nap everyday on this trip)
- quick dinner at Le Petit Saigon, very tasty
- picked up luggage from hotel, changed to nitetime (warmer clothing), go through immigration, board ferry and head back
- there were some huge swells which were not fun but eventually we made it back to Seattle w/o incident
- got lost looking for H. Suites, found lots of interesting bugs there though
- we were all just so exhausted, I think for once we all slept soundly
- advice: remember to bring soap/shampoo to cheapy hotels
- advice: wish there were more days to the weekends (Sat/Sun) because on Fri/Mon, even though it was a holiday and M was on vacation, his cell kept right on ringing throughout the day, I don't know how he puts up with it, you'd think about 10 years later I'd get used to it, NO WAY

Tues 7/8/08
9:30 flight to SFO

witnessing

2008-06-11T09:05:00.000-07:00

In the American version of Shall We Dance, the wife says marriage is a promise to be a witness to someone else's life.

I then recall what I told CJ at lunch a few months back. We were talking about the periods we took off from work - I to stay at home and he to travel and live in other places. I told him how looking back, staying home with the bubs was the best time of my life.

When you leave a job, you don't really indulge yourself by recalling it, except the fun lunches with coworkers, the good times, but not the day to day.

What I like about the kids is days, months, years later, I want to go back and see the pictures capturing those moments, activities, laughter, life. I want to remember it and it's sweeter every time. Watching them is amazing, like those time-lapse movies of a seed > seedling > sprout > bud > humongo plant. It's amazing each time.

I need to let go a bit and not hold on to things that keep me from just enjoying the moment. It's very difficult. When you're working, you have to be serious, responsible, the house of cards can come tumbling down at any moment so you're always critical, judgmental and it's difficult to leave that mentality at the end of the day/week. I know people can, I just can't.

So for now I struggle with accepting that these next few months, it's ok to just be. Try not to be critical, just listen and learn.

Of course there is a ton of things I should be committed to at the same time ... hmm

where is Marina, CA

2008-06-08T19:35:00.000-07:00

Thursday M comes home and says ___ for work.

The mermaid in me says it's high time we visit the ocean.

Next day I find a vacant room in Marina, CA at the Ramada. That room was almost as long as our house. Very weird with the high ceilings. I felt like it was just a big empty box. Nice whenever breakfast is included.

We headed to Carmel, where I'm sure it was in the 50's. We saw other people in swimsuits ... in the water. Did that family think just because you're at the beach, you don tankinis? I let the water come over my bare feet and it felt like the blood in my veins turned to ice. I have no idea how that family played in the cold water. brrr.

It was fun having the entire wet edge of the beach to myself and the kelp as I walked along it. I felt like skipping except I kept seeing this yellow foam coming in with tides, what was that?

After that brisk fun, I craved chinese food. We drove closer to the downtown and happened to park in front of Tommy's Wok. Serendipity, we found Chinese food.

Earlier M and the girls were ogling the Wild Things Ranch brochure so the girls wanted to go, thinking they were going to be up close and personal with lions, tigers, elephants, ...

The 2007 Christmas incident at the SF Zoo came to mind quickly.

Well we went and it was up closer/personal than at the zoo but not like how Kayla hoped.

Finally since we were doing so much anyway. (I started with the intent of just going to the beach and returning home.) We stopped at Casa de Fruta. M's been wanting to detour there for a few years so why not. It was one of those places where everything is named, Case de .... Just like the last company I was at, everything was named with ...Force.

I really didn't have as good a time as this all sounds. I'm just the face of eternal glum.

bunny, week 2

2008-06-05T09:23:00.000-07:00

I really disliked keeping bunny in the house because he really smelled up the living room. So I moved her cage to the garage. (Oh I like to refer to it as he even though it's a she, just seems easier to refer to it in the male sense.)

Also because she's confused about where her potty is. I thought they could be trained to use the litter box. Apparently she was confused when not in the cage and preferred to use the corner of the room where her cage used to be. arghhh. Also now in the cage, she kicks out all the bedding and uses the litter box as a bed and the cage as a litter box, ewww.

I noticed there were times in the house she would jump and race off repeatedly. It was funny because she would sometimes skid on the hardwood floor.

I felt bad when she raced, feeling that she'd prefer to be in the wild.

So I finally let her loose in the backyard. This also made us realize the vulnerabilities in the surrounding fences. I am amazed how fast that rabbit can race, sometimes it's too fast for my eyes to track.

I laugh at how pathetic we are in terms of still being afraid to touch/grab the rabbit. You should see how we try to catch her to put her back into her cage. Like a bunch of idiots chasing this tiny rabbit.

All I can say is - skittish!

letters from Iwo Jima

2008-06-05T09:14:00.000-07:00

I first heard about Iwo Jima a few years ago after M returned from one of his work trips in Germany. He mentioned sitting next to someone on the airplane who was working on the movie. They were flying back to the US from Iceland, where part of the movie, Flags of Our Fathers was filmed.

I think that peaked my curiosity enough to see the movie Letters from Iwo Jima yesterday. I tend not to view battle filled movies.

It was good to have seen the events. More so, I enjoy being able to use M as my walking historical encyclopedia. He is filled with many historical facts, like when a battle took place, between who, why, geography, etc.

It was also interesting to learn that Clint Eastwood made 2 movies about the same battle, but from different perspectives, one American and one Japanese.

another live one

2008-05-27T10:34:00.000-07:00

what oh what have I gotten myself into now

just in case you're wondering, it's a super furry lionhead bunny, ~ 3 pounds

I was warned about the responsibility, but ... I can only blame myself ...

truth

2008-05-20T19:35:00.000-07:00

The funny thing about the work issue was that the thing they were complaining about. It's what my dad is always harping me about since I was a teen so obviously there's truth to it.

Certain people provoke me or I have no patience for certain people and I end up raising my anxious voice with attitude.

Interesting, either tons of people ignore it, accept it or I just hid that side well until now. I know it's other people are more forgiving.

So my dad was right all these years, one day I'll get fired for having this attitude. Even though I resigned it felt the same.

How do other people do it - always have a sunny professional tone.

And the other truth is that in reality people will have attitude/opinions. Just that most people take them in as a whole, so long as they're productive and not postal, it's ok.

This week I feel mad at so&so because they took my spending power away. Then again I can only blame myself for reacting hastily and not staying around to resolve it.

Then again this is a personal exercise to live like a non-bay-area person.

isn't it?

may 08

2008-05-19T10:11:00.000-07:00

We've been reading Muncha, Muncha, Muncha and Tippy, Tippy, Tippy, Hide!

Cate pointed out Muncha ... at the library since she heard the story at school. It's neato, Kayla will practice her reading and get stuck on words, Cate will fill in the missing words when she senses a pause since they have the book on tape at school so she's pretty much memorized the entire story. That's efficiency for ya.

Kayla impressed me the other day that she's a sharp kid. When we were reading Tippy... she asked, how did the farmer know which entrance the bunnies came in the nite before to know which opening to close up in his home. So true! Good sleuthing skills.

M's been in Europe for work and m-l-c. I've been spoiling C a little by letting her stay up at nite after she lays in bed long enough for K to fall asleep.

Last nite she regaled me with life at preschool. She can talk for a long time. She was telling me the color of the laundry baskets used at school; how the washer/dryer are behind these doors next to the 3's but you need a key to open it (I did notice keys hanging from that lock); the color of the lunch cart and how the food is on top and the napkins are below; how you have to press something and pull a tab to get milk out of the spout;... Funny how in 30 minutes, she repeated about every 7 minutes that Sh threw up in her mom's car and had to go to the doctor's at naptime.

I read Swapping Lives by J. Greene this weekend. I'm kinda going through that right now except I'm both characters - the mom and the working gal. Both are full time lives and living both sometimes means one's not living.

My thoughts are full of so much info and to-do's. I kept trying not to forget it was teacher's appreciation week 2 weeks ago for both girls. I was late and booked a bday party for K in late June. So on the day of her birthday, I forgot it was her birthday. That was bad. I had no idea that's what M was talking about, I was thinking about gifts for the teachers.

Then it's just the whole thing about not really getting to enjoy the girls. Worrying about if C is sick, who will take time off. Of course it's all do-able. So when I was told I was not worthy to switch from contract to FTE because of my interactions with 1 person, my lead; who makes a list of accusations against me each month. I resigned.

It didn't count that I got along with the 10+ other people I interact with everday nor that some wrote praises/thanks to my manager.

I admit it was a bit over-reactive and based on emotions. But it's a fast paced, high pressure env. I push myself technically everyday and to find out some guy is reporting Kindergarten level playground accusations against me and it's preventing me from getting hired and the manager will only hear his side and not my side. I don't need that additional thing to work on. True I can improve but to also be berated about it. I don't need that.

So I'm taking time off to figure things out and enjoy the summer with the family. Trying not to overwhelm myself though I feel I left things unresolved since I sneaked out the HR route - kinda unprof.

sigh. I miss working a little but having this freedom is nice too.

I am grateful to have a supportive husband and to have the option to do this.

sf spider on the embarcadero

2008-04-22T20:07:00.000-07:00

Sunday afternoon next to the SF Ferry Building

We tried hand-made marshmallows for the first time. I've often heard that it cannot be compared with the store bought Jet Puffs and yes, I have to agree.

unpalatable and miracle growth

2008-04-22T19:59:00.000-07:00

I rarely remembered this plant existed and haven't really watered it since it last flowered. Here's what it looks like today. I've watered maybe 2-handful of times and once added some miracle growth orchid powder. I don't understand where this mass comes from since the pot is just barely a pint of woodchips and dried roots.

Kayla was telling me in the car on the way home from school how they're learning about owls coughing up pellets. She mentioned something about a white heart-shaped face barn owl.

While I'm eating dinner, she finishes her regular home and says can she work on her science homework. I ask her what it is. She takes out these ziploc sandwich bags filled with owl pellets. I'm about to hurl. I don't know why I cannot stomach the thought.

Kayla tells me it's not gross, I just think that because I haven't done it before. She says she doesn't mind because she wants to be a vet. I ask what she's going to do with those bags and she said she needed to pour it out somewhere so she can dig through it. eww.

Here she is telling Cate, look - a molar, an eyeball, a bone, more teeth, ... ewww, why did M have to work late tonite.

magical mornings in grand ca

2008-04-13T12:33:00.000-07:00

We took a much needed vacation to southern california.

M took the girls down earlier in the day. I went at my own pace: walk to caltrain - BART - SFO - through not-so-crowded Intl terminal to Virgin America and sat next to no one - Supershuttle with people from -50F lands - greeted by elder daughter most excited to see me at hotel room since I wasn't supposed to be on this trip.

Next day we had a relatively leisure day at Dland.

Memorable moments:
- watching Cate nod off during lunch at the Blue Bayou

- all 4 of us in the Matterhorn ride, after the 1st drop and little one behind me yelling I don't like this ride! (sorry little one, too late now)

- splitting up into 2's, girls are a little more manageable this way, particularly when they become tired/hungry and we did not prepare well in terms of food, rest, timing

- seeing another family with 2 girls creating a mess, talking back to their parens at Yamabuki while ours were angelically coloring (of course the angelic part was temporal and just coincidentally a good moment for our 2 but a moment I was happy with).

- taking advantage of Snow White telling the girls a bedtime story via tele at 8pm so I could trick them into going to bed early which they did after a long day.

Next day someone discovered Libby Lu and what it was about. I don't know how she picked up on what type of services they offered but this was her 'one thing'. I'm happy to have thwarted her from all her spontaneous desires during the trip, each lasting approx 1-2 minutes and then quickly forgotten. Trick with the elder one is to warn/nag her days before that she can only get 1 thing at the end of the trip and to think wisely about it. During the trip she had some fits but in the end, we had just 1 thing. whew.

Second day was a scorcher. It helped to discover other entrances into CA Adventure, aka no lines. We tried to eat a little better than day one.

I didn't feel a need to get any rides so I was content to just sit with one or two girls in the shade and chill. We were fortunate to get Cate down for a nap eventually at the hotel. Took about an hour but then she was down for 2. It helped that we could bribe the older one into silence with the hair thing though she didn't fall asleep.

M enjoyed having the elder one to go on rides with while I chilled with the little one who didn't like Dland rides. They are all too scary. We enjoyed watching the blue genie show and listening to the local band from San Jose. I was astounded with Soaring over CA, it was our first time. We went twice.

The girls enjoyed meeting characters during meals. It was fun to go all out for once and just hang out.

(of course it wasn't as relaxing as all that since I'm permanently uptight but it was as good as it gets with me)

new foods

2008-04-06T11:32:00.001-07:00

something I have been enjoying - cooking/eating fennel (bulb all sliced up) with olive oil, salt, & cracked multicolored pepper (more complex flavor than regular black/white pepper). It's like eating celery/onion but won't leave you with bad breath cuz it has a mild licorice flavor.

falling off the chair

2008-03-27T20:05:00.000-07:00

M rented Paris, je t'aime recently. Some stories were good, others unexpected, many strange.

Let's try to get some common ground first.

So my understanding of French words is of course the American phonetic of the French word's spelling. ie. when I was in Paris in 1997, I asked my mom's friends, how the heck do I get to the famous Champs Elysees. You can imagine a room of old and young Asian French people and here's this tall clunky American asking where's the Champs E-li-sees. They all said they never heard of it. I was incredulous. So I repeated it a couple of times. Finally I pulled out my travel guide and pointed to it and they were like, ooooh, champs elysees. I couldn't repeat it for the life of me.

So if you understand that experience, you may also enjoy the final clip from Paris, je t'aime. I could totally understand that American woman speaking French cuz that's how the words I see are translated in my mind. It's crazy-wonderful cuz no Frenchman would understand it, only an American who wishes she could speak French & has never taken a French class would understand :)

Sadly, after watching that movie, I have no desire to go to Paris in the near future. The city was depicted as being so dense and right now the thought of crowds is stressing me out big time.