tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228796902008-06-23T15:17:14.440-07:00Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comBlogger150125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-28403950064135164672008-05-12T08:13:00.000-07:002008-05-12T08:22:22.414-07:00

Question and Answer Jokes about violins: - What's the difference between a violin and a viola? - There is no difference. The violin just looks smaller because the violinist's head is so much bigger. - How do you tell the difference between a violinist and a dog? - The dog knows when to stop scratching. - What's the difference between a fiddle and a violin? - No-one minds if you spill beer on a

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-27989960589808240542008-03-07T13:20:00.000-08:002008-03-07T13:22:38.773-08:00

A popular bar has a new robotic barman installed. A guy comes in for a drink and the robot asks him: "What's your IQ?" The man replies: "130." So the robot goes on to make conversation about physics, astronomy and so on. The man listens intently and thinks: "This is really cool." Another guy comes in for a drink and the robot asks him: "What's your IQ?" The man response: "100." So the robot

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-21440753003274149232008-03-06T12:40:00.000-08:002008-03-06T12:47:14.235-08:00

Alcohol Irish Joke 1 Murphy lay in hospital covered in bandages head to foot - with just two little slits for his eyes. 'What happened to you?' asked Cassidy. 'I staggered out of the pub and a lorry hit me a glancing blow and knocked me through a plate glass window.' 'Begod,' said Cassidy. 'It's a good job you were wearing those bandages or you'd have been cut to ribbons!' Alcohol Irish Joke 1

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-63708118010799970102008-02-23T14:00:00.000-08:002008-02-23T14:01:37.461-08:00

St. Peter is questioning three married couples to see if they qualify for admittance to heaven." Why do you deserve to pass the Pearly Gates?" he asks one of the men, who had been a butler." I was a good father," he answers." Yes, but you were a drunk all your life. In fact, you were so bad you even married a woman named Sherry. No admittance." St. Peter then turned to the next man, a carpenter,

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-66927230278199907792008-02-23T13:52:00.000-08:002008-02-23T13:57:07.253-08:00

This is one bad lawyer commercial but it is also quite funny, especially the pictures at the beginning:

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-69100489497207192132008-02-23T13:50:00.000-08:002008-02-23T13:51:20.433-08:00

You Might Be A Lawyer If.... You are charging someone for reading these jokes. The shortest sentence you have ever written was more than eighty words long. You have a daughter named Sue and a son named Bill. Your other car is a BMW. When you look in a mirror, you see a lawyer. When your wife says "I love you," you cross-examine her.

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-12244052802187150692008-02-23T13:48:00.000-08:002008-02-23T13:49:01.259-08:00

Warning Signs that you Might Need a Different Lawyer 1) Your lawyer tells you that his last good case was of Budweiser. 2) When the prosecutors see your lawyer, they high-five each other. 3) Your lawyer picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose." 4) Your lawyer tells you that he has never told a lie.

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-52020868154027342292008-01-12T14:24:00.000-08:002008-01-12T14:27:06.128-08:00

A man wearing a Democratic pin walks into a bar and sees a picture of President Bush hanging behind the bartender. He calls the bartender over and says, "You should take that picture down. George Bush is a blight upon this nation. He should be impeached." The bartender, a life-long Republican, is completely offended. "Why you liberal piece of garbage. How dare you come into my bar and tell me

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-35335837169207841462008-01-04T12:22:00.000-08:002008-01-04T12:25:46.804-08:00

The Ray Owens Joke of the Day website is one you might want to visit. Today's feature joke is: "The Top 15 Signs You've Lived With a Mathematician Too Long" His cute habit of converting every number to base seven is really starting to annoy you, because he insists on doing it 33 hours a day, 10 days a week! He has his graduate students working on reconciling your irreconcilable differences.

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-86030071429116433502008-01-03T16:00:00.000-08:002008-01-03T16:04:53.059-08:00

Much has already been published about the sexual preferences and notorious behavior of former President Clinton. However, little has been reported on the sexual practices of the current Commander-in-Chief. It has recently been learned that the President and Mrs. Bush only make love with Laura Bush on top since George W. Bush can only f**k up.

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-16645276877126189642008-01-02T02:46:00.000-08:002008-01-02T02:51:26.963-08:00

Our joke of the Day today is a Blonde joke: A blonde and a redhead met for dinner after work and were watching the 6 o'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge. The blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump, and the redhead replied, "I'll take that bet!" Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead the $50 she owned. The redhead said, "I

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-26689406866572613882008-01-01T03:22:00.000-08:002008-01-01T03:28:55.776-08:00

Square Dance Joke 1: How many square dancers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Eight. Square dancers do everything in groups of eight! Square Dance Joke 2: THE NEW SQUARE DANCE Up With The Petticoat, Down With The Pants. In With The Pecker, Everybody Dance. Girls With Rags On, Up Against The Walls. Guys With A Hard On, Promenade The Halls. Girls Grab Your Partners Firmly By The Balls.

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-90781617054805589022008-01-01T03:17:00.000-08:002008-01-01T03:20:24.904-08:00

There once was a blonde who was very tired of blonde jokes and insults directed at her intelligence. So she cut and dyed her hair, got a make-over, got in her car, and began driving around in the country. Suddenly, she came to a herd of sheep in the road. She stopped her car and went over to the shepherd who was tending to them. "If I can guess the exact number of sheep here will you let me have

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-29981253152492800212007-12-31T12:26:00.000-08:002007-12-31T12:34:44.079-08:00

This was labeled as a looking good joke and appeared on Craiglist. It is under the form of a letter: Dear Good-looking guys, Thanks for ruining things for us average-looking guys. You, like all men, will tag pretty much anything female. So you go out to bars and other social venues and you go for the low-hanging fruit. You go for the average-looking girl. Why? Because they are easy and don't

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-76918490036138741932007-12-31T12:10:00.000-08:002007-12-31T12:24:59.002-08:00

You can call it a scary face email joke or a random ghoul appearing out of a sudden, the truth is that it is called a screamer. We are dealing with a scary face that appears out of the blue in a usually cute and cuddly movie. It is all a joke, usually sent through emails. Well, the result is usually that the individual jumps out and gets scared just like in the following funny movie. It is a

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-66771917245753389242007-12-24T12:19:00.001-08:002007-12-24T12:20:24.500-08:00

Here is another funny rap movie I enjoyed from the same dude as before with Happy Holidays. Hope you love it as much as I did! Well, you need to be American to feel the pain of this movie:

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-32344637284578564842007-12-24T12:05:00.000-08:002007-12-24T12:11:02.100-08:00

Pretty cool and funny video. Some dude singing a song he composed called "Happy Holidays". This guy is pretty funny and he can rap so it is fun to watch. Interesting funny movie:

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-54048273425019826092007-10-17T15:36:00.000-07:002007-10-17T15:37:30.241-07:00

"My god! What happened to you?" the bartender asked Kelly as he hobbled in on a crutch, one arm in a cast. "I got in a tiff with Riley." "Riley? He's just a wee fellow," the barkeep said, surprised. "He must have had something in his hand." "Aye, that he did," Kelly said. "A shovel it was." "Dear Lord, didn't you have anything in YOUR hand?" "Aye, that I did -- Mrs. Riley's tit." Kelly said. "And

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-87048761742013274282007-10-17T15:35:00.000-07:002007-10-17T15:36:15.752-07:00

An old woman is in the bar of a cruise ship and she asks the bartender for a scotch and two drops of water. As the bartender gives her a drink she says, "It's my birthday today and I'm on the cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday." The bartender says, "Well, since it's your birthday I'll buy you a drink. In fact I'll take care of this one for you." As the woman finishes her drink a woman to her

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-54211602506973087322007-10-17T15:31:00.000-07:002007-10-17T15:34:59.104-07:00

Two old drunks were lapping them up at a bar. The first one says, Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn't bend it with both hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. "By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I'm gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand." "So", says the

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-86949300678959855002007-10-12T10:09:00.000-07:002007-10-12T10:10:30.963-07:00

Dancing Monkeys - Watch more amazing videos here

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-82928415186007508672007-10-12T10:04:00.000-07:002007-10-12T10:09:34.294-07:00

Little Johnny catches his parents going at it. He yells in, "Hey, Pop! What are you doin'?" His father says, "Son, I'm filling your mother's tank."Johnny says, "Oh, yeah? Well, you better get a model that gets better mileage. The postman filled her this morning."

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-13036877900732430682007-10-12T10:03:00.000-07:002007-10-12T10:04:48.861-07:00

An old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. "I want to become a lawyer. How much is it or the express degree you told me about?" "It's $50,000," the lawyer said. "But why? You'll be dead soon, why do you want to become a lawyer?" "That's my business! Get me the course!" Four days later, the old man got his law degree. His lawyer was at his bedside, making

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-76079314871241885602007-10-12T09:55:00.000-07:002007-10-12T10:00:56.816-07:00

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the surrogate father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon" Half an hour later, just by chance a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning, madam. I've come to...." "Oh, no need to

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22879690.post-70282463571519091342007-10-07T13:06:00.001-07:002007-10-07T13:06:44.113-07:00

A bloke wins the lottery and decides to buy himself a Harley Davidson, he goes down to his local bike shop and after purchasing a top of the range bike, the owner of the shop tells him to coat the bike in Vaseline every time it looks like raining. That night he goes and picks his girlfriend up on his new toy and heads over to her parents house for the first time. As they arrive there, she

Adrianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04920904299851473569noreply@blogger.com