tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228588112009-07-16T00:19:54.647+01:00"Scraping Along The Bottom!"Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.comBlogger700125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-72837109938712024402009-07-15T22:38:00.003+01:002009-07-16T00:19:54.935+01:00

I've been thinking a lot about humour lately. Now, I know what you are thinking - so you should be, it's about time you injected some into your bloody site - but my current musings have been focused on the nature of humour, and how what we perceive as being funny changes over time. I was sent on this mental journey after spending some time on the relaunched Some of the Corpses are Amusing (SOTCAA

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-22325885780257621582009-07-14T19:55:00.004+01:002009-07-15T22:38:41.233+01:00

In the first of an occasional series diminutive pop singer and saucy minx Lily Allen joins us as our new swearing expert. Lily is widely acknowledged as one of Britain's sweariest performers and is renowned for highly inventive use of expletives (particularly where the press are involved). Indeed, Britain's top swearmeister, Damien Ffook, whose world famous 'School for Swearing' was attended by a

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-48575501042625272292009-07-13T19:49:00.002+01:002009-07-13T21:09:45.091+01:00

I've just endured a highly traumatic weekend, besieged in my own home by barbarians. Actually, it wasn't as exciting as that description makes it sound. Perhaps I should explain; I have the misfortune to live just across the road from a town-centre park. Now, it isn't the park itself which is the problem - it's actually quite a nice park, surprisingly large and well kept. Its main downside is

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-88339862359786125562009-07-09T20:09:00.003+01:002009-07-09T20:36:43.345+01:00

Micheal Jackson really is the gift that keeps on giving, isn't he? Even after his death he has continued to amuse us with bizarre headlines and strange behaviour. Take that 'memorial service' for him - what the fuck was that all about? Is it just me, or is it just little bit weird to have a gold-plated coffin as guest of honour at a concert? To be quite honest, I was expecting that, at any

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-62752618585843400702009-07-07T22:32:00.003+01:002009-07-07T23:55:57.521+01:00

Yes folks, I finally remembered that I had a Stripgenerator account and came up with another of my crappy comic strips. I know, I know, but I was too lazy to actually write anything tonight, (and yes, I know Jacko didn't actually die at Neverland, but it looks better than 'At a rented Bel Air mansion').

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-35000138991231022972009-07-06T20:03:00.004+01:002009-07-06T20:42:54.204+01:00

Concerns over the mental state of 82 year old Pope Benedict XVI were again raised when, in an apparent state of confusion, he publicly greeted US President Barack Obama and his family stark naked, save for his mitre and crook. President Obama, assuming this was normal Papal protocol, began to take his own clothes off until stopped by the First Lady. Vatican officials rushed to the Pope and tried

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-19217846566478431092009-07-03T20:33:00.002+01:002009-07-03T21:07:22.878+01:00

That’s the question we here at Sleaze Diary want answered - have you been shagged by a celebrity? We’ve all seen those dubious kiss and tell stories in the tabloids, but can you really believe them? After all, these so called ordinary punters spilling the beans have been handsomely remunerated for their stories. So, just to ensure that any stories we print here at Sleaze Diary are authentic, we’

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-48060934351260630602009-07-02T20:03:00.002+01:002009-07-02T20:35:06.918+01:00

You've probably noticed that so far this year I haven't moaned about the Glastonbury Festival. There are several reasons for this: firstly, the BBC didn't run those bloody patronising adverts implying that everyone who lives outside of the M25 is a yokel; secondly, I didn't have the horrible experience of seeing (and hearing) my trumpet-playing twat of a neighbour in the audience during the TV

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-16735221116438427302009-06-30T20:44:00.004+01:002009-06-30T23:34:57.010+01:00

With the 'King of Pop' barely cold on his mortuary slab, speculation as to the manner of his demise is already rife. "I heard he was whacking off over a stack of child pornography and the excitement was just too much for his heart," claims internet muckraker Hernandez Savoy, who claims to have impeccable sources. "Apparently he suddenly leapt up, one arm thrown upwards, the other hand clutching

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-77038943292252358252009-06-29T20:11:00.004+01:002009-06-29T20:44:37.812+01:00

Church leaders disatisfied with Pope Benedict XVI's highly conservative papacy are reportedly already lining up potential successors. "He's no spring chicken," observes Bishop Jim Bazonga, a prominent member of the Roman Catholic Church's liberal wing. "He could pop his clogs at any time - we need to be prepared!" Perhaps most surprisingly, Bazonga and his colleagues are currently favouring an

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-17224670388086071502009-06-26T21:23:00.002+01:002009-06-26T21:26:06.145+01:00

Competition time again! Interest in serial killers has never been greater with books, newspaper articles, films and all manner of memorabilia appearing - one manufacturer is even planning to bring out a series of ‘Great Mass Murderers’ lunchboxes, flasks and backpacks for kiddies, featuring the likes of Fred West, Jeffrey Dahmer and Dennis Neilsen. Today we’re giving you the chance to become the

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-27688328059836235702009-06-25T21:03:00.001+01:002009-06-25T21:04:50.673+01:00

Continuing my anti-celebrity theme, I’ll briefly tell you another thing about the bastards that really gets my goat. Remember when you were a child, and there was always that other kid in your class who get away with blue murder? Or that sibling who could apparently do no wrong? You know what I’m talking about – if you played some sort of harmless prank, like setting fire to the school bike sheds

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-80845712740506406992009-06-23T20:00:00.003+01:002009-06-23T22:43:51.743+01:00

Having dealt with my hatred of the world of celebrity in my most recently published editorial over at The Sleaze, I thought I'd continue in the same vein and give an airing to another of my current pet hates - bloody journalists. To be precise, it is really columnists, the cream of the crap in the journalistic world, who have really been irritating of late. Don't misunderstand me - it isn't

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-83192163618159797532009-06-22T19:51:00.003+01:002009-06-22T20:59:50.572+01:00

I always thought that weekends were meant to be relaxing, leaving you refreshed and ready to face the new week with batteries fully recharged. I've started this week feeling completely exhausted, leaving me wondering if my mini French film festival had been such a good idea. Finding myself with an entire weekend to myself, rather than get outside and enjoy some Summer weather and some much

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-87436176408611715132009-06-19T22:42:00.003+01:002009-06-19T23:18:33.226+01:00

A Buckinghamshire branch of the furniture retailer Ikea recently found itself temporarily overrun by nudists. “Ten or twelve of them at a time were leaping onto the display beds and indulging in wild an energetic sex,” claims Ralph Milner, assistant manager of the Swedish chain's Quainton Road branch, who suffered third degree friction burns to his groin when his polyester trousers were ripped

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-6082418008812346502009-06-18T20:07:00.002+01:002009-06-18T20:51:47.553+01:00

One of the things I thought that I'd miss when I abandoned cable in favour of Freeview were those ten minute previews the adult channels used to run around midnight. I swear that all the 'highlights' of these channels were packed into those ten minutes - quite why anyone felt the need to subscribe for more was beyond me. Whilst programmes with titles like The Adventures of Walter Clitty might

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-14510261132412638672009-06-16T21:25:00.001+01:002009-06-16T21:31:14.240+01:00

How likely is it that you’ve been shagged by a spy? Well, you never know, especially if you work on sensitive government projects or are employed in a security cleared position. They’re out there you know, just waiting for some likely prey to pounce on, and the worst thing is - they look just like us! So, how would you know if you’d been bonked by the Stasi, or received a golden shower courtesy

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-36678226192988018732009-06-15T19:44:00.004+01:002009-06-16T00:28:30.836+01:00

Whilst having an enforced day off last week, waiting in for the plumber, I caught that legendary episode of Diagnosis Murder. You know the one - where Dr Sloan actually finds time to treat a patient in between solving murders for his son, the LAPD's laziest detective (why do any police work when you can get your old man to clear up all your outstanding cases?). I wouldn't mind, but it isn't as if

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-79113700892602277172009-06-12T23:45:00.005+01:002009-06-13T00:55:18.665+01:00

OK, it's time for some end-of-the-week competition fun! As we all know, many celebrities have stood trial or even served time for various crimes and misdemeanours. Wrestling star Booker T, for instance, was once convicted of armed robbery, whilst Robert Mitchum famously did time for possession of dope. Jerry Lee Lewis, although not actually arrested, was run out of Britain in the 1960s when it

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-64059854611069967492009-06-11T20:55:00.002+01:002009-06-11T21:30:40.047+01:00

Yet another piece of research which falls into the "No shit, Sherlock" category: over 90% of Tweets on Twitter are made by only 10% of users, meaning that it is more of a mass broadcasting system than a peer-to-peer communication tool. As I've noted before, the whole terminology of Twitter, all that 'followers' business makes it seem like a religion, so it really shouldn't be a surprise that it

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-64939016593268176862009-06-09T20:54:00.003+01:002009-06-09T21:28:37.032+01:00

The celebrity slaphead - who can deny the fascination that a gleaming pate holds? A glistening chrome dome can propel a hitherto run of the mill celebrity into another level of fame. Take Telly Savalas. For years just another hairy heavy in supporting roles, but as soon as he shaved that bonce - a singing, wisecracking and lollipop sucking megastar. Its a similar story for Yul Brynner - who

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-30113981977017574282009-06-08T20:25:00.002+01:002009-06-08T21:07:38.685+01:00

It's an ill wind, as they say, and some sad news has been sending a fair amount of visitors my way. Like all lovers of bizarre low budget exploitation movies, I was shocked and saddened to hear of the death of David Carradine last week. It is the continued confusion surrounding the nature of his demise which has been fuelling traffic to The Sleaze. Now, I must admit that I was somewhat

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-24384002959868860732009-06-04T19:45:00.003+01:002009-06-04T20:36:34.540+01:00

I've a nasty feeling my sins are fast catching up with me. A new 'Turkish style' barber shop has opened a couple of streets away from my house. Clearly, they're closing in on me after all those terrible things I've written about the Turks, both here and over at The Sleaze. Perhaps they've traced my IP address - time to change ISP again! But just what is 'Turkish style' haircut, I ask myself

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-6531031736494701952009-06-03T19:59:00.003+01:002009-06-03T22:36:20.266+01:00

Whilst I don't get those requests from TV researchers trying to get in touch with various (fictional) characters from The Sleaze, in between all the e-mails about viagra, or from lonely Russian women seeking soul mates, my inbox does occasionally still see some strange unsolicited missives. Recently, for instance, I got an e-mail from an aspiring politician which took the form of a piece of

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22858811.post-21952672356657141602009-06-02T20:01:00.002+01:002009-06-02T23:46:22.513+01:00

Top cerealologist Frank Dibble has rocked the paranormal world by sensationally claiming that the crop circles regularly seen in Southern England are part of a sinister conspiracy between the British government and aliens. He told the recent annual paranormal enthusiasts convention - Weirdcon - in Birmingham that he had evidence from environmental groups that the fields the circles appeared in

Doc Sleazehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09939793278552442225noreply@blogger.com0