The Knitting Tango

Quickie Response regarding Side to Side Garter Stitch Gloves

2008-05-15T16:15:00.003-06:00

Dee left a lovely comment searching for a pattern for side to side gloves - I'm such a technodork that I can't figure out how to email you, Dee, and thought I'd post a response for you here - hope you see this!

The glove pattern is a custom sized on created by a fabulous Bigfork, MT knitting teacher. It is really quite ingenious. I'll pull it out from my pattern stash this evening and post either a link to the pattern or a link to the teacher's contact page. She might even have a formula for you to work out a custom sized pair yourself. I don't even remember her name off hand (I feel badly for that - she was so wonderful! It was also quite some time ago!). But I'll get you the info as quick as I can! They work up pretty quickly, too - maybe a weekend or so.

Soon, Dee! I promise!

Why Do You Wear Makeup?

2008-05-15T15:45:00.005-06:00

Been thinking about this one a little bit lately. There's been some interesting discussion over on the Aromaleigh Forums dealing with explaining to a husband/boyfriend/girlfriend/partner/mother just WHY a girl might like painting her lips and lids. So often significant others feel that you are simply, perfectly gorgeous without a speck of makeup on. And they are in fact RIGHT! However, knowledge of your own physical perfect doesn't really quash the fears that maybe your brows could be stronger or more finely arched, or lips could be fuller, cheeks hollower, eyes sparklier, whatever.

What I tell women in my store, when they are perusing the lotions and potions and pearly powders on my counters, is this: A girl should only do that which pleases her heart and her eye. NEVER wear makeup because you feel you "need it," or worse yet, because "everyone else expects you too."

OK - so now what. Well, I have a partial list of reasons for using cosmetics, and I'd love to see it fleshed out. So interesting, this little bit of superficiality which can, in fact, amplify the view of your SELF to the entire world, if you engage in the polishing and primping under full consciousness.

Here's the list so far:

1. I wear makeup because I feel better about myself when I do. Now this has nothing to do with my FLAWS, real or imagined. Truly, I pencil my brows because I find that my eyes have more prominence when I do so. Same with mascara. Without those bits of artifice I feel that my eyes become no more important that my cheek, or nose, or earlobe. And I'd really much rather have people pay attention to my eyes than my earlobe. More information comes from those eyes!

2. I wear makeup because it can be a delightful bit of creativity. The colors alone make me happy. They don't even have to be colors that "look good" on me to please me. And the application doesn't even have to make me look "better." Sometimes just looking different is well enough.

3. I wear makeup because I like being able to mold the responses of others based on what I choose to project. Do I want to feel fresh, youthful, fun and have people respond to me in that way? Then it's light on the eyes, fresh and clear or bright on the lips, rosy cheeks, softer brows. On the other end of the spectrum, am I tired of being treated like a second class citizen? Do I want to perhaps send the message that people best not cross me? Then I'll darken those brows even more, strengthen the arch, line those eyes, maybe shroud them in a dark shadow AND work that dark Gothic Chic lip. Channel my inner Natasha. Yeah, you BETTER take a step backwards, darling. I just might bite!

4. I wear makeup because I want to stand out from the crowd. If everyone else at an event is likely to be doing minimal or fresh, then I might choose to pack it on, wear the falsies, sparkle plenty, just to state loud and clear that I am different from all the rest.

5. I wear makeup because I want to fit in. Sometimes, you really do just want to go with the flow, match others around you. If you need to gain trust, or have strangers instantly feel comfortable, you mirror their actions and expressions and voice inflections. Not mimic, just mirror. Same thing with appearance. Working a business suit crowd? You'll more effectively deliver your intended message if your appearance doesn't pose a distraction. So look like those you'll be circulating among! Wear a suit, or reasonable facsimile thereof. Style your hair to a similar level of doneness. Wear a similar style of makeup, usually more classic, traditional or understated, with maybe just a "power lip."

Now as an aside, I think that many women start wearing makeup because they want to fit in. Think about middle school or high school, those tender years when you are simultaneously discovering a whole LOT about yourself, who you are, what your beliefs and values are, what you want to BE when you grow up AND trying desperately to fit in with your chosen social group. Notice that is is rarely, if ever, phrased as what you want to DO when you grow up. Always BE. No wonder high school and college is fraught with such intense anxiety! Anyway, cosmetics can be used to send a visual signal regarding what tribe you belong to. Kohl rimmed eyes and frosty lip gloss, or no makeup, or a punk take on it all become gravely important when finding your group. Imagine trying to join the Jocks if you are the figurative 98 Pound Weakling. Or imagine trying to break into the Popular Kids circle without the "right" brand of jeans. Or imagine trying to hang with the Punks (or pseudopunks, or Emos or Rockers or whomever) without the right amount of black eye liner/black clothing/black hair/black lipstick etc. Could a Prep meld seamlessly with the Smokers? probably not so easily. So if your kid is sporting a look that you don't particularly like, take a moment to figure out which tribe they are a part of. And remember that simply not liking their style isn't always enough of a reason to forbid it. Look at big picture stuff - how is your kid's behavior, their grades, are the kids they hang with REALLY up to no good, or do they just LOOK like they might be? Try to dig beneath the surface before getting worked up over eyeliner or torn jeans or something.

OK - now where were we? Right - reasons to wear makeup. So many possibilities, all of which are valid AS LONG as you are consciously choosing. Decide what message you want to send, and then send it. Truly, the only reason to change what you are doing is if you are not getting the reactions and responses you desire and deserve. Do folks look past you as though you are invisible, or talk over you at meetings? Might be time to up the image ante - sometimes you actually DO have to look as though you have something of value to say before people will believe you have something of value to say. If you want folks to leave you alone, the best and clearest communication of that will be an appearance that doesn't invite people in. Maybe something dark and hard edged, or something just a little on the edge of "crazy bag lady" will do. Sad? Maybe. True? Undoubtedly.

Understanding that cosmetics are tools of communication really takes makeup out of the realm of the superficial and puts it's power right into your own hands. YOU are the "master of your FACE, the captain of your soul," to botch a perfect gloriously true quote from Henley.

Warm hair and eyes, cool skin? YES - it is possible!

2008-05-15T15:25:00.004-06:00

I have had a lovely bit of correspondance from JerseyGirl in the last few days, and with her kind permission I'd like to post it here, thinking that perhaps it might benefit somebody else!

Without further ado -

Hi Bridget!

I just read your notepad and some of your blogs on color. (I found an old post that had the link). I was wondering if you could help me, as you are definitely an expert on this stuff! Very informative! (Oh my goodness - what a sweetheart JerseyGirl is!!)

I'm having a heck of a time figuring out this color thing. I still can't figure out what category I fit into. I have brown eyes and had honey/strawberry blonde hair as a child. I don't tan well at all, am very pale, but over the summer, I get a very very light golden cast to my skin. I've heard people tell me my skin is pink, but I've also been told it is more peach too. I look best in black and brown, and also cool toned reds with a hint of wine or burgundy, and deep emerald or deep turquoise green colors. I look better in white than cream. I can pull off peachy orange or yellow (mostly when I have a bit of a tan), but camel gold makes me look sick. I feel like when I wear dark pink shades of blush, I come alive, but peach doesn't give me that effect. I can pull off blonde and red hair (and colored it red recently actually, with many compliments, but when it becomes brassy faded orange, it doesn't look as good)

Any ideas? I'm confused, because I think I have warm hair and eyes, but perhaps cool skin. If this is the case, I want to make sure I'm playing up my features as best as I can.

Thanks and sorry so long winded!!

Hi! I'm glad you emailed me!

From your description is sounds as though you do indeed have a cool or neutral/cool skintone! What clinched it was the description of camel gold making you look ill. That is a warm color, about the warmest one, and one which is NOT possible to have a cool variant of.

Your hair looks lovely! What I see in the pictures is a vibrant, bright true clear auburn red - which would be very very striking with a cool or cool/neutral skintone.

With your light brown eyes and red hair or strawberry blonde hair, most MAs and sales folks would want to peachify you to death - tons of amber, olive, khaki and so on. You could wear those colors, of couse, and they would harmonize nicely with your eyes and hair, but would probably wash you out and leave you looking pale and wan Always remember there is a distinct difference between LOOKING pale and BEING pale. Being pale is fine, even desirable if your natural skintone is in fact pale. LOOKING pale can apply to anyone, and indicates ill health or unflattering color choice.

Based on your description, I'd steer you toward clear, saturated colors - look at a classic Winter color palette - start there and then desaturate (make paler by adding white), or mute (make duller by adding grey) or warm slightly (by adding yellow) until you find the exact tones that suit you best. I'd love to see you in a cobalt blue top, or a vivid periwinkle, or even a bold raspberry pink. Chrome yellow - the clearest sharpest tone - would also be very striking and dramatic. All those clear and true colors will be gorgeous on you.

Have you found a Mac foundation match yet? That can be helpful too - as long as the match is actually correct. If you are fair, try matching color to your neck or collarbone, since fair skins often carry way more color in their faces due to freckles or flushing and such. If you match just the face, you run the risk of looking like you borrowed your tan sister's head for the day, or like you've been working in a gravel pit and need to wash the dirt off. When you match your collarbone or neck, even if the shade is technically lighter than your face, you'll end up with a cohesive and blended look. Once it's on, you won't look like Geisha Girl, all cherry blossom white and pale. You'll just look like a beautiful and luminescent YOU.

Does this help at all? I hope so!

Oh, one last thing - if you do get a MAC match and find yourself in an NC or C (neutral yellow and yellow, respectively), DO NOT flip out and decide you "must be warm" . Yellow tones are actually NEUTRAL, since they sit between red (warm) and blue (cool). Wear the colors you feel good and look great in, whatever they might be.

email me any time!

-b.

Thanks Bridget, for taking the time to reply at length. That made me feel so much better, because I'd read stuff about seasons, and while at first glance I always thought I was an autumn, I'd read further and see many colors recommended that didn't look good on me at all.

Funny you mentioned looking at the winter palette and doing variations of the colors. When I was in high school (20 years ago) and sporting my natural strawberry blonde hair, I got lots of compliments when I wore lavender, mint green, and royal blue! So what you're saying makes sense! Then I got older, thought I was wiser, read that those colors were a no-no and then never really wore them since.

I will have to go get a MAC match. Will they help me at the counter with this? I am always so skeptical too, because of the fluorescent lighting in stores, I'd love to get the match done in natural daylight. I don't wear much foundation, because my sunscreen has a tint which helps. If there are particular foundations from MAC you like, I'd love to know. My skin is a bit dry with some fine lines, but I can get oily as the day goes on, since I live in a humid climate.

Thanks again for your reply - it really makes so much sense now!!

I'm glad you found it helpful!

I think there are likely lots of people with cool/neutral skin and warmer hair and eyes that are probably struggling with color selection. I know I struggled for years and years and years, and still even now default to brown clothing WAY too often. I do ok with makeup, pretty unafraid of color (I'll wear a hot pink lippie, or a red or purple one, and I'll also wear chartruese, gold, periwinkle, orange or red eyeshadows, too!), but I'd guess about 85% of my wardrobe is black or brown, and I really only wear a handful of colors...

Are you LOVING your red hair? It's such a great color - looks awesome in your pics!

Oh - about Mac foundations, I am really no expert on their formulas (nearest counter is about 300 miles away from me). But their color numbering has become sort of "universal". Prescriptives is very good that way too - four color families, then various depths in each. So just as a bit of scientific research, it might be fun to get color matched at either (both would be even better!) counter. Then you'd have a sense of where you fall in commercial lines. DEFINITELY don't make a purchase decision until you've worn a color for a full day at least, and checked it in all sorts of lighting. Fluorescent lighting can make even an otherwise great colormatch look off, and the cool blue/green hue of fluorescent bulbs really makes pinkish shades look SO pretty, even if it clashes with your skintone. No matter where you go, ask for a small sample of foundation - enough for 2-3 days is usually what they'll give you. Nordstrom has small glass vials they can fill with product, or little flat white snap compacts. Take the samples home and really just play with them, stripe your cheek and jaw with the different colors and look in all different lighting. I like a magnifying mirror for this. You'll soon figure out which undertones are most prominent in your skin. Also match color to your collarbone and throat. It's even a good experiement to apply it to well protected skin to see undertone. (I use my belly, since it NEVER gets sun on it, and it's easier to see than my bum :) )

Anyway, have fun experiementing !

Also remember that skintone "temperature" is just one part of the equation. You also have degree of clarity vs mutedness (how much grey is in a color, or how much beige is in your skin) and then degree of contrast between hair and skin (ie how much lighter or darker your hair looks than you skin in a black and white photo). Clear and high contrast needs clear, saturated colors to really shine. Muted tones or low contrast outfits will just sort of drag you down.

My own example - dark red hair, pale peachy skin, green-grey eyes. High contrast, slightly muted but not as much as a classic auburn, definitely warm skin. I wore a light aqua shirt with teal and gold stripes the other day - put it on under an oatmeal colored sweater, which pulled the gold stripe forward. Shirt looks great on me, sweater looks great on me, but together there was no contrast between the depth of aqua and the oatmeal, so I looked and FELT very ungrounded, blah, washed out. Swapped the oatmeal sweater for a chocolate brown one, which also pulled the gold stripe forward, and looked a million times better. Even more importantly, I felt comfortable. Sweaters were the exact same style, btw. Chocolate sweater gave better contrast with the light aqua shirt.

Basically, the aqua shirt, oatmeal sweater and my skin were all of similar depth, so everything just blended into a mush. Dark sweater was the same depth as my hair color, so it popped against my skin.

Thanks for the nice remarks on my blog - it's so sadly neglected these days. I try to post now and then, though. Want to do more!

Be well and happy!

-b.

So there you have it - a short course on the possibility of warm hair and eyes and cool skintone.

Now - if JerseyGirl wasn't typing out as a "classic" autumn by the four season theories, what else COULD she have been?

OK - strawberry or honey blonde hair definitely won't be Winter. Could be spring or summer, though. Both are lighter plaettes, spring being warm and clear, and summer being cool and muted. From her description of wearing a deep pink blush and coming alive but not popping at all while wearing a peach blush, I think it's safe to say that spring isn't where JerseyGirl falls. So that puts us in the summer palettes, which are COOL. Summer also tends to be relatively muted, softened, sort of vintage chintz colors, and from her descriptions and the picture she shared with me (use your imagination, please), her "new" red hair color is simply way too vibrant for the classic summer palette - in all those sunwashed shades, she'd just look a little washed out herself. Hence the advice to shift her attention to the winter palette, and then dial up or down on the intensity and degree of coolness at will.

Now, in a few more contemporary books on color analysis (Uniquely You is a great one, although it's a bit older) they break 4 seasons into 12, which gives MUCH more leeway, and also allows for variants or hybrids of seasons, such as my "late autumn", which is a Winter/Autumn hybrid the book calls of Bright Autumn or September. I don't have the book right in front of me, but I'd bet that JerseyGirl would recognize herself in the Summer/Winter hybrid or the Summer/Autumn hybrid. But my money is on the Summer/Winter blend!

Anyway, there you have it. Hope it was helpful. And if YOU Have a color question, for heaven's sake, please feel free to email it to me, or post it as a comment on the blog. I don't guarantee to have ALL the answers, but I'll sure tell you what I think!

Choosing Your Best Colors!

2008-04-10T14:22:00.002-06:00

We've talked a bit about colors for redheads before, and in that post I laid the groundwork for thinking about the 3 qualities of color - temperature (warm/cool), Contrast (light/dark) and clarity (muted/clear). You should be well on the way to figuring out your own best colors, the ones that make you look and feel alive. But man alive, there is nothing more deadening than figuring out that you are warm/muted/low contrast and looking at the basic Spring palette and then feeling completely, utterly disappointed and dejected because you just really do not like coral, cantaloupe, butter yellow, sage green, whatever...And where on earth did your amazing strong periwinkle go, the one color that you ALWAYS feel awesome in, and which ALWAYS garners you oodles of compliments? Oh - there it is, tucked over in WInterLand, far far away from your new address in SpringVille.

Grrr.

Here's something else to spin your heads - you can definitely borrow colors from other palettes and look FABULOUS in them if you get 2 of the three mail qualities in harmony with your own coloration.

So - three qualities -

Contrast - high vs low, or how saturated the color is. Pastel colors are NOT saturated, they have lots of white in them. Richer, darker colors ARE saturated. THink of it like taking a glass of water and adding a single drop of blue colorant, then dipping a tissue in it. It's a very pale tint of blue. Tint = white added. Now add in 99 more drops of blue. Your water will be very saturated with color - might even be verging on midnight or navy looking. Now dip your tissue - the color is a deep, rich, saturated, VIBRANT blue.

Mutedness - muted vs. clear, or how much black (or brown or beige) has been added to the color. This in painting talk is called SHADE - literally adding in shadow to the color (HUE). So, let's consider a glass that has had 50 drops of blue colorant added to it, then a tissue dipped. The color is very clear, since it is a pure hue (also medium saturated, enough to really see the color). NOW, drop by drop, add a black dye to the glass - you'll see an entire range of blue SHADES moving from the clearest (no black) to the shadowiest (50 drops of black). The shadowiest also gets darker, of course...BUT you can take your SHADE of blue and add white to obtain a MUTED TINT of blue. So it is muted, but is lighter than the starting midtone blue.

Temperature of color - warm vs. cool. It is important to remember that the color wheel is a wheel, not a line. And actually, it's a color SPHERE, with an infinite number of possibilities for HUE, SHADE and TINT within the division of warm and cool. WARM = ORANGE and RED, COOL = BLUE AND GREEN.

If you nail all 3 qualities, you will look AMAZING! Clear, glowing skin, bright shiny eyes, smooth skin, happy, vibrant, alive, balanced! WOO HOO!

If you tag 2 of the qualities that are your own, you will look really great - and you will find that you can go brighter or softer on lipstick or gloss than you usually do, or might have fun working a serious colored shadow or a smokey eye, or going betterthannude with your makeup. It's FUN!

If you match up with just one quality, you won't really look like yourself, but rather perhaps like a "mom" version of yourself - a bit drabber than normal, not hideous or "OH My Gosh, I cannot beLIEVE she's wearing that color."

If you miss all three, people will start suggesting you lie down, drink some water, give up red meat or start eating some, or something. You might even be sent home from work! (If you do, actually, get sent home, I suggest NOT going home, but going shopping instead for a blouse or shirt in a perfect for you color. Think of the miraculous recovery you will have effected when you flounce into the office the next day in a GREAT color!!)

And for those of you still lamenting the discovery of yellow undertones in your skin, check this out:

Check out a visual of a color wheel. Oh year - YELLOW is in the MIDDLE between orange and green...Yellow can be THOUGHT of as being a "neutral" tone for the purpose of skintone definition. And Red abuts Violet, so red, COULD be cool...depending on if it is a blue-red (violet, cool) or an yellow-red (orange, warm).

So lets imagine that in your foundation tests, you have determined that the "coolest" AL shades of foundation - the Ps and Cs - DEFINITELY don't match your skin. Put the P on and you look a little pepto bismol. Put the C on all over, and you look like you've been frying yourself in the sun and are burned, or in the throes of a hot flash, or both. GOOD! You now know that your undertones are not PINK/RED.

So you check out the "warm" shades of Y (yellow tones) and W (peachy tones).

If the W looks great but the Y looks a bit pale or sallow (usually it will just look pale if you have peachy golden tones), then you can play with the Ws perhaps in combo with the Ls to soften the peachy golden undertone.

If the Y looks great, but the W looks either pink or oompa-loompa ish, then you need the Y, perhaps with a bit of L to soften the strong golden/"olive" undertones.

Olive skins are not necessarily just pure "yellow". Olive skins contain a degree of "green" tinge (which sounds so unflattering in relation to a skintone, but it is gorgeous - do NOT judge skintone by labeling with hues - NOBODY wants green, yellow, orange or red skin. We prefer cool olive, golden, peachy, rosy descriptors, don't we?). And that green/olive tinge comes from what? Yellow + X = Green? Solving the equation for X we get the following:

X= Green - Yellow
X = BLUE.

SO a yellow based skintone that is OLIVE is a cool tone due to the blue content.

A yellow based skintone that is GOLDEN could be described as a warm tone due to the slight reddish or peachy content.

So, yellow straddles the divide between WARM and COOL vis a vis skintone descriptors, because it COULD go either way, depending on additional undertone.

Next, we can get into the matter of how these different tones play against each other. Adding yellow to a red skin will bring it more into a peachy appearance, because yellow + red = orange (peach). If you wish to soften the appearance of strong yellow tones in your skin, you can add a bit of lavender, because yellow + purple (lavender) = brown (beige).

Then you can begin to play with how color sets up a complimentary and flattering vibration against your own skintone. Remember in grade school staring at the red box on the white paper, then quickly shifting your gaze to the blank white paper and "seeing" an image of a green box? Those are color complements, opposites on the color wheel. Another example is to place two blocks of color against each other - try red and yellow - see how they hum and buzz and visually have lots of energy? Red and green practically dance off the page. Red and orange are easier/softer to look at. Purple and yellow are vibratory, purple and red are less so.

The more visual vibration/activity, the more tension or drama.

So, if you have a beautiful cool yellow/olive skintone and want a dramatic lip, you can play with a saturated cool violet shade. The cool purple tone is the color wheel opposite (complement, like complEtion, not complIment, like a nice thing to say), and creates tension, drama, high impact.

For a less dramatic look, perhaps even bordering on blah, that same beauty could select a lipstick in an ambered honey tone. That's orange, basically, but a muted, earthy "natural" shade of orange. There wouldn't be much contrast at all between her skin, her lips would just sort of melt into her face, and she might look boring, dull, blah, "beige" washed out, or as though she had no mouth.

She will look more interesting, more dramatic, in the sharp cool violet lipstick. And she will look GORGEOUS and soft, pretty, approachable if you keep the HUE of the lipstick the same and then muted it (shade it) with some brown tones, and maybe tint it lighter with a white tone, to bring it all into harmony with "natural" human coloring (I haven't seen anyone with a naturally occurring deep vibrant sharp cool violet lip yet, have you?)

Anyway, no matter what your skintone, you can choose to wear colors that compliment (do nice things for it!) via playing with the visual energy of color combinations intentionally.

And all the "rules" in the world should on be in place to SERVE YOUR NEEDS! Do you need to (want) to look soft, approachable, trustworthy, authoritative, powerful, aloof, untouchable and so on? Choose colors to create the sort of response you want.

I remember a while back we had a new poster on the Aromaleigh forum who sadly didn't post much beyond one or two entries. S/He said that there were far too many thin lipped women here wearing way too dark lipsticks, which weren't flattering at all and we should be instead only wearing nude shiny shades to amplify the paltry lips we did have (I am paraphrasing, not quoting, and I've got me some paltry little lips, too). While her advice was in fact correct (light and shiny colors and finishes bring things forward, dark and matte finishes push things back), she was also totally WRONG because how you dress your body and how you make up your face MUST be descriptive of who you are, how you are feeling, how you desire to be treated, what response you wish to elicit from viewers. There's something about a dark dangerous lipstick that I really do love. I KNOW it's not my best look - deep aubergine eggplants and blood reds are both sorta "too cool" for my 1N or 1W skin, red hair golden freckles and green eyes. They are also too intense or saturated, given that my coloring is mid to high contrast (my hair is dark, but it's not espresso or black, and my skin is very light, but it's not Alabaster or Ghost in depth) AND somewhat (not terribly) muted. And my facial features don't really lend themselves easily to high drama looks, as by today's beauty standards I'm more "wholesome" than "dominatrix." Wish it were the other way around, really. And I could probably get there if I had some stylists lurking who could help dress me and make me feel ok enough about the "costume" to walk about out in public. So for so many reasons, that deep dramatic lip really just isn't "me," BUT I LOVE THAT LOOK!!! And I WANT TO FEEL LIKE A DOMINATRIX. Sometimes. Or at least make folks back off a few feet because I might be dangerous, and maybe even bite. So, on occasion, I channel my inner Natasha (from Rocky & Bullwinkle - remember her, that angular beautiful Russian spy always "out to get Mooose und Skvurl"?) and wear that plummy aubergine or dark red lipstick.

And I love it. On those days I don't care that I don't look "pretty." I don't even WANT to look "pretty." I want to be powerful. Edgy. Weighty. Significant. And that tube of darkness brings me just that much closer to my own gravitas.

So there you have it!

Bat Those Lashes, Ladies!

2008-03-26T15:21:00.004-06:00

! I just put falsies on two of my customers, and they looked GOOD!!++
(falsies AND my ladies!) First time I've ever put them on someone else! WOOHOO!!! I had the best time, it was so much fun to play with someone else's face. My ladies looked gorgeous and they loved them!

We used Ardell Clusters, medium and short lengths. Totally naturally flirty on both gals - one in her 50s, the other 73. They were beautiful women when they walked in, and now they are sexy flirty eyelash batting coquettes! Hubba Hubba!

So, maximize your eyes! What's stopping you? It's super easy, really.

No pics - I'm not that organized, but here are some tricks to using cluster lashes like these

First, start with clean bare lashes.

Find a pair of round tip tweezers for gripping and maneuvering the little clusters - Tweezerman makes great ones, and the round nose is both safer AND easier to work with, as it keeps the little cluster pointing straight rather than going off at an angle.

Gather your tray of lash clusters and your individual lash glue (I like clear best).

Make sure you have good light and a magnifying mirror. You might also want to have a little orange stick with which to coax your lashes into place, but that's not necessary.

Most importantly - take your time, don't drink too much coffee, and don't do this in the middle of a round of low blood sugar! Eat something first!

Now, take the tray of lash clusters out of the blister packaging to get it ready. Open the glue and place a little dollop of it on the blister packaging, or on a bit of tissue. This will become your working palette, essentially.

With the tweezers, grab the lash cluster in the center of the hairs, as close to the bulb as you can get. gently peel the cluster from the tray.

Dip the bulb into the adhesive - I dip the tip, then sort of swirl it a little bit to make sure there is a little dollop of glue encircling the bulb of the cluster.

With head tilted back so that lids close, but you can still see out from underneath your lashes, place the bulb of the lash at the outer corner of your eye - maybe 2-3 eyelash hairs in from the very edge of the corner. The clusters will lay on top of your own lashes, so you want there to be a nice foundation for them. Push and coax the cluster in toward your lashline until the bulb is resting up against your lid, right at the root of your natural lashes. you can lift your eyelid from the brow bone with your non-dominant hand and sort of make a little crevice into which the bulb of the cluster will snuggle. Keeps the clusters nice and tight for up to 4 days, if you are gentle with the washing off at night!

Repeat as desired - small to medium eyes generally look great with 3-4 lash clusters applied about 1/16th to 1/8th of an inch apart, from the outer corner until right over the center of the pupil. Larger eyes can take as many as 6-7, and can generally carry the lashes further in toward the nose, as well.

The neat thing about using clusters instead of strip lashes is that they are just about invisible on your lashes - you don't need to hide an edge with liner of any sort. The glue dries invisibly, so the lashes are not visible even seen up close, with eyes open OR closed. Clusters are the way to go if you want flirty, dramatic fringe without a heavy look.

Once all the lashes are in place, let them set and dry for a few minutes. You can do some other part of your face. Then apply your eye make as usual. Gently curl your lashes with a curler, if you do that sort of thing, then carefully and gently apply a NON WATERPROOF mascara to blend the real lashes with the falsies.

TADA! Gorgeous flirt-worthy feathery fringes!

if you are careful in the washing at night, and if you avoid oil based cleansers and eye makeup removers, your lash clusters will hang around for days!

Pretty cool, huh?

How to Wear Red Lipstick

2008-03-21T14:41:00.014-06:00

Spring is sprung, the grass is 'riz, I wonder where the bright lipstick is!

Oh, gosh - it's just been "nude, beige, natural, concealed past the point of recognition" lips for far too long. I am SO past it - even the nude lip icon, Jennifer Lopez, looks fresher and brighter with a dash of color on her lips:

See what a difference a bit of fresh, healthy COLOR makes to even the most gorgeous face? And seriously - how many of us actually look as beautiful as J-Lo anyway? So if a look is unflattering on HER, well....you get my meaning.

So, in honor of a change of seasons, let's all do a change of face. uh, I mean lips.

Go pink, peachy, rose, mauve, coral, orange, violet - so many shades from which to choose!

But go BIG or go home!

For right now, let's talk about RED lipstick. It's perhaps the most womanly or ladylike color there is - classic, used across cultures and across decades - heck, across centuries! There has been tons written already about the whys and wherefores of red lipstick. But what really matters is the HOW of red lipstick.

But first, some inspiration.

With red, you have to let your eye adjust a little bit, especially if you're used to nude/gloss looks.

Start by applying your foundation/concealer/powder if you usually use them.

Then put on red lipstick. Try a gentle stain first - apply with fingertip, then blot.

Look in your mirror.

WOW. That's BRIGHT!!!

Leave it alone - DO NOT wipe it of. You heard me! NO TOUCHING THE LIPS!!!

Go do something else for a little while, then look again.

Man, you are ALL lips. For better or worse. If you are blessed with full pouty lips, you probably feel like you've got a child's inflatable pool toy resting smack dab in the center of your face. You do not. In actuality, you have full, pouty, sensuous lips that are now tinted a super sexy shade of red. If your lips are smaller or more delicate (as I like to describe my own), you might be feeling that the intense color is somehow shrinking your lips to tinyness. It isn't. Just seems that way. Give it time.

No add mascara and do your brows as you usually do.

Look again. That's better, isn't it? Balance is being restored to your face. Your lips STILL look silly bright. Mayeb you feel like a clown. Or a cheap hooker. However, you do NOT look like either, unless you are wearing a red rubber nose or booty shorts. Heaven help you if you are wearing BOTH a red rubber nose and booty shorts. Either you need to check into rehab, start charing WAY more for, umm, special services, or turn in your Clowns Union membership card.

Now go do something else for a while - check the Aromaleigh Forums.

Look in mirror again. Now those red lips of yours are looking more "normal", huh? Yup.

Your eyes are adjusting to a new bold lipped you.

Add a bit more lipstick, or go deeper, richer, shinier or matter - whatever. Just play a little bit. Find a balance that strikes you. It's your face, after all!

Add eye liner if you usually use that. Look in mirror again.

Ooh - Me Likey!

Now, put on a pretty top and go out - to the grocery store. That's the perfect place because you are on display, but not ON DISPLAY. You have the perfect excuse to linger, or to jet out quickly if you feel uncomfortable.

Chanel your inner Gina Lollabrigida or Sophia Loren, or Bettie Paige, or any other red lip maven you love. Smell the fresh produce, buy yourself some flowers. Make kissy faces in the store windows as you pass.

Reapply your red lipstick in public - make it a caress. Put on a show for anyone who might see. Order up a latte somewhere, and revel in that perfect lip print you place on the rim of the white paper cup. Sexay!

Catch the admiring glances of passers by. Aren't you loving it?

Yup - you are now a red lip girl! GggrrrrrAAAWWWWWWrrrr.

I knew you had it in you!

Repeat as needed for ANY bold, bright new color. Shake it up - if everyone around you is doing red, opt for Schiaparelli shocking pink. Hanging with the Coral Crowd? don a bit of violet for good measure. Heck - grab a bold cobalt blue if you are especially daring. Whatever your choice, just have fun, wear it confidently, own it, rock it. They're your lips, but they're on display for all to see!

What Season Am I? Warm? Cool? What?

2008-03-21T14:37:00.001-06:00

WARM OR COOL - HOW TO TELL!!

Note - this is OPPOSITE to the whole MAC thing, so if you figure you are WARM with this, then you'll want a C or NC foundation/powder/etc from MAC, or if COOL here, then look at W and NWs there.

First, look at your wrist veins. Do they look more blue, green or purple/lavender? If blue or purple/lav, you probably have more pink in your skin than yellow. If green/olive, then you have more yellow in your skin than pink.

Now think about what looks better on you. Do you look best in a shirt that is

white or cream?
pink or peach?
red or orange?
fuschia or eggplant?
black or brown?
silver or gold?

If you chose colors from the first ones mentioned, then you prefer cool tones. If you chose colors from the second ones, then you prefer warm colors. Does that match up with what you saw re your veins? If you prefer cool colors to wear, do you also have more pink than yellow in your skintone?

Don't worry if you don't - and DO NOT get balled up about having "yellow" skin and being relegated to wearing warm shades.

Here's why:

On a color wheel, you have the whole spectrum running from red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet. Usually we see the wheel positioned with red on the left top and violet at the right top, We draw a line down the middle, and red, orange, yellow are on the left (warm) and violet, indigo, blue are on the right (cool). But what I see is that YELLOW should be right up at the center top when thinking about skintone, because yellow is actually a very neutral tone. Here's why:

Melanin, the pigment in skin, is always yellow based. How it reads through your skin is dependent on skin thickness, veining, circulation, and so on.

Think of the old season classifications - color me beautiful and stuff. Spring and Fall are warm seasons. Summer and Winter are cool seasons. Gorgeous olive skinned Mediterranean and Asian women are *usually* categorized as Winters, and look FABUOUS in cool jewel tones with high contrast and intensity.

A Fall might also have yellow undertones, but her's will likely be more golden peach, and that places here in a Warm category.

So, yellow is netural - it can take you into Cool territory if it has a green tone to it (this is subtle - you do NOT look green if you have olivey skin). Or yellow can take you into Warmsville if it moves into orange/peach.

Now that you've got your skintone deciphered, you can REALLY Play with color. If you have a warm skintone and want to look natural and polished, use warm colors (colors found in your own skin, hair and eyes). If you want more drama, choose OPPOSITES - break out those cool purples, pinks and blues. And the inverse - if you have cool toned skin, cool tones in your makeup will be easiest to wear and look natural, polished and pretty. Up the drama by bringing in some warmer colors in moderation.

Lastly, think about your overall contrast level - skin vs hair when seen in a b/w photo. Are the close in value? THen you are lower contrast, and should find it easiest to wear colors that are of similar depth value (again, a more natural and polished look). If skin and hair look very different - ie dark hair and lighter skin, or platinum hair and dark skin, then you'll fare best in higher contrast colors - choose darker, brighter or lighter than your skintone by several degrees.

And yeah - always exceptions, and never rules. But this should get you started!

A Redhead Color Typology

2008-02-23T13:34:00.002-07:00

Below is somethng I wrote after MUCH contemplating on the whole Color Me Beautiful/Seasonality thing. As a redhead with dark hair and pale skin, I was always typed as an Autumn, which really didn't do much for either my mood or my coloring, truthfully. So I set out to fine tune color typing for redheads myself. I first posted this over at the Aromaleigh Forums - you can read the original post along with a bunch of feedback from other redheads by clicking on the blog title.

Enjoy!

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I’m sure you’ve probably heard or been told by well meaning people, cosmetics sales associates, image consultants, moms and sisters that “you look best in green.” Or “ you should stick with earth tones and neutrals.” Or “never wear black.” Or “you don’t look good in pink/red/orange/purple/grey/whatever.” How many times have you been told that you are “an autumn?” Or that your coloring “requires muted shades so as to not overpower you.” In my opinion - and that of top makeup artists and stylists - that’s all nonsense.

There are so many variations on the theme of Redheads - it makes choosing makeup and clothing colors both exhilarating and challenging! There are muted, Autumnal redheads with golden ivory skin and coppery hair. There are those ethereal, gossamer creatures with translucent, milky white skin and fiery or deep red hair. There are redheads with pinked, English rose complexions and strawberry locks. Peaches and cream redheads. A full range of high contrast, low contrast, clear and muted redheads!

With so many skin and hair combinations, how could it possibly make sense that all redheads will wear the same foundation, look best in the same colors of clothing, and choose the same (limited) palette of eye shadows and lip colors? Truth is, it doesn’t. And unless the person dispensing with advice is herself (or himself) a redhead passionate about fashion and makeup, they probably haven’t really given the topic a whole lot of thought.

On the other hand, I have.

Here are some breakdowns on redhead types and colors that can really make them stand out - even more than any of us already does! Remember - it is possible to be two or even three distinct types, although one type will probably feel the best, look the most polished or sophisticated or natural.

Muted: You might be a muted redhead if your skin tone is light with golden undertones. You might even have pale olive skin. Your hair can range from the coppery end of strawberry to the chestnut end of auburn. Your eyes might be grey-blue, any variant of green, brown, hazel, or amber. You instinctively reach for olive green rather than forest green, or chocolate brown rather than charcoal. If this is you, then you probably got some good advice from those well-meaning folks who recommended earth tones, neutrals, pumpkin, olive, russet and such. However, while those shades might be phenomenal on you in clothing, they might not serve you as well in makeup. Your coloring is gorgeously characterized by the relatively low level of contrast between your hair and skin tone - putting a dark, muted-to-the-point-of-drab tone on your face could end up making you look sallow and lack-luster. Rather than matte olive shadow, try a medium golden olive or khaki. Instead of pumpkin lipstick, blush or shadow, look for a warm bronzy shade with some life to it. Try some slightly subdued reddened coral on lips and cheeks. And remember to go for the gold - subtle, warm sparkle can really lift your look while still remaining appropriate for daytime.

Gossamer: You might be a gossamer redhead if your skin is translucent to the point of being nearly transparent. Your skin tone likely carries more pink and blue than it does yellow and olive tones. Your hair likely ranges from strawberry to medium coppery red. And your eyes are probably blue or green - from true blue indigo, through aqua to nearly emerald. Left to your own devices, you probably reach for clothing at the lighter end of the spectrum - pinks (even though someone told you redheads should avoid pink!), lavenders, gentle mint greens, dove grey and so on. If this is you, you might have been feeling like you just can’t make it work - the colors that you like - and that look great on you - just aren’t the shades recommended by the color typing books, the sales person at the cosmetics counter, or the clothing sales associate. Relax! Forget what others have been telling you about those earthy, rich tones that look so lovely on your muted sister, and reach for the colors present in a springtime garden. All those pastels you love? Go for it - in sweet sorbet tones for your eyes, and petal soft washes of color on your lips and cheeks. Just avoid colors that are distinctly cool-white based - instead of that milky pink gloss, try one that is just a bit less washed out, perhaps a pale rose with a golden highlight.

High contrast: The most distinctive aspect of your coloring is that your hair and skin sharply contrast. Your skin might be either pale golden ivory like your Muted sister, or the gentle pink or blue based pale of those Gossamer girls. Either way, your hair is dark red - auburn, burgundy, black-red (yes - this hair color is even present naturally!) and contrasts highly with the light value of your skin. Your eyes are probably in the blue/green/grey range, but hazel, amber and limpid chocolate are possible, too. This is a tricky redhead to dress and make up because all those rich earth tones which look smashing on a Muted and overpowering on a Gossamer really just make you look drab. And dull. And tired. If you have ever read the books Color Me Beautiful or Color Wonderful, you probably found colors on the Contrast and Winter palettes that worked beautifully for you. You need rich shades that are just slightly muted rather than clear and sharp like those found in those cool Winter palettes. In clothing, you probably can carry off black as well as a raven haired beauty. And shades like clear peacock blue, sharp, fresh apple green, slightly burnt orange, indigo, plum, and slightly browned wine make you sparkle! In makeup, look for colors that preserve that balance of clear to muted, but in slightly softer tones. Try a soft slate grey shadow along with tones of rich, fleshy pinks and wines (for a color cue, look at the inside of your lip, or pinch the end of your finger - the color of the blood under the skin is a great red tone for you !). Coppers that lean pink will be amazing on you, as will mahoganies, reddened plums, chocolate browns and golds. In lips, you can go a little cooler than your Muted sister - try a warmed up plum or burgundy along with nudes, and don’t forget the power of a deep, dark chocolate mouth, too. When you find the right red - a clear, just barely browned neutral red with just a slight hint of blue - the result will be stunning! I fall into this category myself, as did an old friend of mine with alabaster skin and bright copper hair. She could have been a Gossamer, but her skin tone was perfectly neutral - not heavily pink/blue. She wasn’t nearly as delicately translucent as a Gossamer, either. She wore colors straight from the Winter palette - cobalt blue, fuchsia, and anything that was a cool, clear bright. She even wore beautiful, hot flushed pink lipstick. She was a stunner!

English Rose: You might be an English Rose if the contrast level between skin and hair is relatively low. Your hair is probably a soft auburn, strawberry or gentled copper. Your skin tone is more pink, and you might be pale to medium complected. Your eyes are most likely blue or blue/grey. Like your Muted sister, your best colors will be slightly muted, but steer clear of the yellow-based shades she prefers. Instead, look at the colors of a vintage Chintz or English floral - those soft, lush shades of hushed rose, butter yellow, taupe, sage green, wisteria and iris. These are your best bets for clothing and makeup both! Accent your eyes with gentle, glowy yellows, lavender-rose, and fleshy, cooler taupe. Lips and cheeks shimmer in more roses, from tender baby pink to full-blown raspberry, just make sure to keep the colors on the muted end of the spectrum.

Peaches and Cream: Closely related to the Gossamer girl, you are also like Muted’s lighter, brighter sister. Your skin tone is pale to fair, with peachy golden tones rather than the pure yellow and olive of the Muted or the pink and blue of the Gossamer. Your hair, likewise, is lighter than that of the Muted - likely strawberry with mango highlights, oranged-copper, and brighter auburn. Your eyes are probably in the green-hazel-amber range. You need clothing in warm, barely muted light to medium tones. A softer apple green, a brighter butter yellow, fresh picked peach (of course!!), chambray blue all suit you beautifully! In your makeup, accent the gorgeous peachy orange tones in your skin and hair with glorious coppers (at the bright end of the spectrum), mid-tone mossy greens, café-au-lait brown, coffee and toffee. Just remember to keep the shades just barely muted - if you drab them down too much, your sparkly beauty will tarnish and dull.

So - armed with the information on your best color ranges, how do you put that into action as the cosmetics counter? Firstly, start with a foundation, concealer and powder that match your skin perfectly in both depth and tone. And if mineral makeup is your thing - as it is mine - then you will undoubtedly find your match at http://www.aromaleigh.com And remember that you do not have to apply foundation over your entire face. In fact, it is more modern to spot apply only where needed - usually under the eyes, around the nose and on the chin - blend well, and dust with translucent powder. If you have chosen the right shades for your skin, there will be no line of demarcation!

Once you’ve got your bases covered - you have chosen the very best match for your skin - you have the delight of playing with colors.
If you are torn between two - or maybe more - redhead types, samples can really help you to narrow it down. Lipsticks, especially, are helpful. If you are an Autumnal redhead, then a swipe of a warm, rich copper will look great on your skin (even if you wouldn’t want to wear it on your mouth for style or personality reasons), while a cool burgundy will just look a bit off. Gossamers can look at the difference between a medium depth clear rose and a muted, tauped-rose. The clear rose will be gorgeous against your skin, while the muted shade, although pretty, will just sort of sit there. High Contrasts can look at the difference between a very muted and subdued browned red and a clear, true red - again, even if you aren’t in the market or the mood for a clear red lipstick, this can be a good color cue. English Roses can use the same shades as a Gossamer would - a clear rose or raspberry against a muted rose or raspberry. And Peaches and cream can test between a copper or russet versus a gentle peach. Your type should become very clear from these experiments. And once you know your type - or types! - color selection gets a whole lot easier and way more fun!

Nothing new to report, but making the habit of posting regularly.

2008-01-07T12:01:00.000-07:00

Well, that hopelessly uninteresting but absolutely honest title really just sums it all up.

I guess the biggest news is that I am cutting off all my hair. Going short. Donating the tail to Pantene's Beautiful Lengths, which much like Locks of Love sends the hair in to be made into wigs for people fighting cancer. I like that - sort of the ultimate recycling program. (I guess Soylent Green would an ultimate recylcing program, too, but that's just macabre.)

Anyway, these are some of the possible styles:

Hubby likes the short flippy one the best - I could do that one, I think. But I'm still thinking maybe an inverted curly bob, one I could wear natural and curly (cute), wavy (a bit edgier or more poished depending on how I style it out) or straight (sleek, piecey, who knows).

My grandson is saying words - "Piper" is one of his first and most consistent, although he also sometimes says "happy" when he sees me. Piper is the name of our golden retriever - Shary does love those big dogs, although little ones frighten him, oddly enough.

The hens are laying pretty consistently now - Joanie and Trixie are both producing. Jewel hasn't started laying yet, but she's thinking about it and has begun to squat and flare her wings when we enter the coop. For those who don't know - that squatting posture is hen body language for "hey big boy - is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?" Hubba hubba. Actually, though, when they assume "the posture" they look for all the world like golden eagle flagpole topper sculptures. A couple steady pats on their backs and a few tail pulls, and they jump upright, run a few steps, and give their feathers a big, giant ruffelation. Pretty neat to see, really.

Well - that's a lot of words for no news. So this is my stop.

2008, a Very Auspicious Start

2008-01-02T12:28:00.000-07:00

Oh my goodness. Has it been SO long since a post? Embarassingly yes. I'm just surprised Blogger didn't close out my account.

Well, so much has happened, but not THAT much knitting or THAT much tango, really.

Rather than do a BIG catch up, I think I'm going to start fresh.

Yesterday, 1.1.08, we discovered that our hens are laying once again. Trixie and Joanie gifted us with one egg each, after about a six week hiatus. Such a gift, as well - and I can't help but think this bodes well for a prosperous and wondrous New Year.

I'm working on a Phildar pattern - a square neck, close fitting pull over blouse in the darkest possible green Berroco Soft Twist. I'm on the sleeves now, and if I can just actually sit and knit instead of being distracted, I might could finish in time to wear it to Vegas on the 17th. We shall see, and I'm not making either pressure or promises.

New things I've discovered:

Makeup Gourmet videos on YouTube:

StyleHive!

New things at
Aromaleigh Mineral Cosmetics!

So much more. And today is so beautiful outside - cold, around 10 degrees above zero Farenheit, but crytalline and bright.

Auspicious, indeed!

Really - We danced, and here's proof!

2007-01-31T13:35:00.000-07:00

More Tango

2007-01-31T13:03:00.000-07:00

It's Wednesday, and still we are immersed in Tango. We've danced on our kitchen floor every evening, and My Pilot told me that he hears tango music in his head and imagines patterns and sequences. I am blown away by his willingness to engage in something so deeply for me.

After considering the discomfort I had working so hard in my ballroom shoes, with their very flexible by extraordinarily thin soles, I ordered a pair of Bloch Boost DRT mesh practice sneakers. They arrived today - gotta LOVE Zappos! Put them on, and they fit so well, and so comfortably. They have a split sole, so one can still achieve complete points and flexions of the foot, with a heel similar to that of an aerobics shoe (cushioning!) and a built up forefoot (more cushioning!!) with a "pivot point" on the ball fo the foot. Eager to try them out, I cued up Haciendose la del Zamora by
Mandragora Tango Orchestra out of Minneapolis and kicked up the volume on the iPod. My Pilot took me in his arms, and we danced in the front of our shop, on the tile floors. A passing family stopped to gather their belongings, and the children, maybe about 5 and 6, stood and watched. While the parents were unimpressed with our style, the little girl really seemed to appreciate it. "Do you see what they're doing? Look, they're dancing! That's so cool!". Children understand the magic of motion, better than we do as adults.

I think that's going to be the biggest challenge for me and My Pilot - learning to trust the motion, and our bodies. Learning to interpret the music from the inside out. Particularly since Tango offers so many opportunities for syncopation, pauses, double, triple or half time. And since it is best improvised, no wrong steps are possible. But you have to trust the motion, let go and follow where it wants to take you.

Chronicle of Tango Discovery

2007-01-29T13:24:00.000-07:00

Day 1: 6pm Friday. We arrive at Conexion del Tango in Spokane a little stiff and tired from a 4 hour drive. Nervous, even anxious, we enter the studio. Two rooms, hardwood floors, old brick and stone, exposed beams, the space is smaller than I had imagined, intimate, in the best possible way. A bit below street level, the effect was like being in a fish bowl - the bright interior cast a glow onto the sidewalk, the windows in the front room at about knee level for the passers by.

The back room was larger, a seating area in the very back, mirrors along one wall, a kitchenette for making coffee, refrigerator to hold snacks. We found a place at a little table along the wall opposite the mirrors and tentatively offered greetings to the few others already gathered. Tim and Betsy, Robin, Kathleen, our studio owner and host Diane, and Ravi Taj, our workshop instructor. Pleasantries were exchanged, and we felt so out of place, having never taken a tango lesson of any sort, and having failed miserably at our attempts to learn from video. Through conversation, we discovered that in addition to being a Tango Discovery intstructor, Ravi was also a highly accomplished pilot. This additional connection gave My Pilot a far greater sense of ease than he would have had otherwise. I felt as though the Fates had conspired to bring us to this setting, with these specific people and this specific instructor.

We shared a meal, pot luck style brought by many. Beautiful salads, rice and lentil dishes, ravioli, potatoes au gratin, a bit of wine. A wonderful way to simply talk, make some friends, break the ice. It was a beautiful start, and set the tone for the rest of the weekend.

Our first exercise was simply walking, without a partner. Just moving through space, taking meandering turns, wandering. No regard given to direction of motion, to following another, just navigating space. Then we moved to doing the same with a partner. Awkwardness soon fell away, as My Pilot and I began to move together as one entity rather than as two merely connected through embrace.

One or two other exercises focusing on spatial awareness and visual cues, and the evening was brought to a close. My Pilot and I retired to our hotel room, tired, still a bit anxious about what was to come, but happy to be there.

Day 2: Saturday, 10:30am. We arrive at the studio and change our shoes. Ravi takes us through some more basic movement exercises, so naturally, smoothly, easily that any awkwardness such contrived movements generally cause in me were eliminated.

He first taught us barridas, or sweeps - leader or follower pushes, sweeps, coaxes the other's foot open, across, forward or back. Then came boleos, where the leg is snapped like a whip, or a lasso, a rope, whatever simile resonates with you. Then ganchos, or hooks - front, back, side, for follower mostly, although leaders can do this as well. We danced in our own inelegant way - nothing was wrong, just different or other than what was being taught. Ravi made us think - no set step patterns were taught, no counting, no right foot or left foot at this point. Simply different elements that make up tango. He brought to our attention the aspects that make a movement natural, flowing, pleasing to the eye and to the body itself.

When 4:30 came around, we were overwhelmed, tired, hungry, and my feet were absolutely killing me. But we had mere hours to eat, rest, repair our bodies and minds for the Milonga at 8. Diane had arranged for amazing live music from the Tango Strings, a string quintet made up of members of the Spokane Symphony Orchestra. It was heavenly - beautiful, soulful slow tangos and sad waltzes, a bit of Bizet, some pieces that really showed the European/German influence on tango music. The sound filled the rooms, made magical by the low light and twinkling candles. And such beautiful dancers showed up - elegant, practiced, some very young college students danced exquisitely, older couples who had been dancing together for years. My Pilot navigated me for a few turns around the floor, and we practiced some of what we learned in the back room. At 11 we headed out, back to the room, heads spinning, feet aching, cramping and on fire, hearts weeping for more.

Day 3: Sunday, 10:30 am. My Pilot and I arrived a few minutes early and grabbed some coffee, changed our shoes and warmed up a little bit. People were slow to arrive - most had stayed at the Milonga until past midnight and were feeling a bit weary come morning. We felt comfortable on this day, but worried that all that we had learned during our major overload session the day before had somehow fallen from our brains in the night. To our distinct amazement and the amusement of our instructor, we actually had NOT forgotten everything. In fact, when Ravi asked the students to do specific things from the previous day's lesson, we were first, on several occasions, to recall the maneuver and complete it accurately. This day was magical, not only for us, but for the other students as well. What was powered through by sheer force of will the day before, became elegant, almost easy. Social discomfort was released, as we each supported, encouraged, applauded the others without regard to level of dance execution - the important thing was that each and every single dancer could do the move!!

As we broke for lunch, Lela and Chuck invited us to join them for a bite - a welcome invitation, and so generous of spirit. We met that at Europa and enjoyed a delicious meal, great conversation, and a bit too much rest time, as we were a few minutes late getting back to class.

The afternoon was spent in arranging different combinations of elements, in whatever way we could or wanted to. As difficult as this was for me and My Pilot, we actually succeeded - more applause and validation and compliments and encouragement! I finally grasped the idea that not only was he to lead me, by agreement, cue or something short of brute force, but also that I needed to figure out how to not only execute what I felt he was coaxing me to do, but also to do it in a way that accommodated him, and myriad next steps, moves or elements. In other words, how to really make it work, with give and take. No frustration. If I failed to do the step My Pilot intended me to do, I'd do something else, and he'd adjust himself. If I needed to turn more, or less, or step out and away, or closer in to complete the maneuver, then that is what I tried to do. I cannot make My Pilot dance a particular way, or lead me in a particular fashion - I can only react and respond to the way he really is dancing and leading me. And I need to do that in a way that brings us both pleasure and ease. And he got this, too. So, I am not completely passive, waiting for him to give me some mythical dance experience full of ethereal and effortless leads and cues, nor am I imposing my own imagined structure on what we are doing. He does not have to power me through steps, simple or intricate. He indicates. Then waits. I respond, the best way I know how, and try to make it easy for him

Several times we were told, "You HAVE to keep dancing - you guys are tango dancers!" or "I can't believe this is your first class - you must be naturals." Nothing could be further from the truth - we simply were there to learn, with open minds, and blessedly open hearts.

And that, I think, is the most important thing My Pilot and I learned this weekend - to learn with an open heart as well as an open mind. That we really CAN learn to do new things, but to do so we must have patience with ourselves, push ourselves to our own place of tension. When we get confused, discouraged, turned around backward and inside out, to step back and then step it out, slowly. That we need to focus on how we feel together, not how we might look to an outsider (in our marriage, we're actually pretty good at this already). That I need to slow down a bit, get out of my head a bit, get into his head a bit. And simply make time for the unfolding.

Sunday Scribblings - Fantasy

2007-01-21T11:54:00.000-07:00

In my fantasy, we tango beautifully. You pull me to your chest make me fly around the floor. Your hand in the small of my back, fingertips gently pushing on one side, thumb pressing on the other, giving me direction, guiding and leading me. In this way, my feet and body know just what to do - not merely what you wish me to do, but really, genuinely what to do that will please us both, in our private tango world.

In my fantasy, our dance creates a private world - something remote, viewable but untouchable. Something for those surrounding the floor to watch, much like watching the patchwork of fields, lakes, farms and towns unroll on the earth below as the jet carries you from coast to coast. Something akin to what it must be like aboard a space shuttle, watching planets and stars whoosh past. Gazing out the imagined windows of the craft, one couldn't help but wonder about the life on the planets, the history, the moment of creation of one, the moment of death of another that we will never see. This is the private world our dance creates, one with birth and death, history, cataclysmic action and reaction, all visible to the watchers, but so remote, so completely foreign that it must be understood only vaguely with the heart. It cannot be known by the intellect.

In my fantasy, our feet fly while barely leaving the ground. Our dance is slow, sinuous, serpentine, nearly appearing lazy, but with such tautness and control, strength and glide that we both, by necessity, must be fully present in the moment, fully consumed by the dance.

In my fantasy, we trace delicate patterns across the floor, round and round the perimeter. It matters not if we are the only two, or if we are surrounded by hundreds of others. Their paths are not our paths, just as the paths of the stars are not duplicated. Though they may intersect, other dancing pairs coming briefly into our orbit and passing out of it, they do not mimic the intricate path we weave on the floor.

In my fantasy, as we dance, I feel both light and ethereal as air, and yet as grounded and earthly as the very stone that makes up the fundament. I feel the flight of the birds of the air, the ebb and flow of waters on the other side of the earth, the pulsing magma at the core of our earth as it steadily progresses upwards, searching for release. In our dance, I am most fully alive, most fully connected with all that surrounds us on this planet, and most fully in my spirit. In our dance, I can see not only the thin sliver thread that connect my spirit and my body, but also the tendrils of silver that connect me to you, and you to me. From the space between our bodies and the instinctual drive to dance, we weave whole cloth. And in this cloth, woven of the dance, we wrap ourselves, blanket ourselves, together safe and protected from the outside.

In my fantasy we glide, dip, swirl, turn, spin, fly, soar, swoop. In my fantasy, you lift me and I float, you gently set me back down, and we do it all over again. In my fantasy, you, too, float, catch the air beneath your feet and soar. In my fantasy, our tango allows us to transcend time and place, and ascend beyond time and space.

The music swells, carries us along, among other dancers, in front of the rapt attentive eyes of the watchers. We know which beats, crescendos, changes in rhythm come next, and we know when this music will end.

And when the song ends, as they always do, so too our tango. A little death, this ending. But also a birth, as we drift slowly off the floor and wait for the next tanda to move us.

Sunday Scribblings

2007-01-07T14:28:00.000-07:00

I found a lovely little blog called Sunday Scribblings that encourages creative writing by posting topics weekly - to participate, just write a bit on the topic and then leave a comment on the Sunday Scribblings blog.

This week's topic is Kissing.

Crushing, brushing, feathery lite, more breath than pressure, or more pressure than breath. Dewy, soft, smooth, gentle, firm. The neck, an earlobe, the back of a hand, or the palm. Kitty ears, baby toes.

All, the joy of the kiss.

Such great joy in being the bestower of the kiss - such a tender ministration, a demonstration of care and love and feeling and comfort, or passion and desire and need.

But to receive a kiss - from your first grandchild, your dear husband, your most aloof kitten. Immeasurable joy!

My husband and I never part without a kiss. Frequently throughout the day we'll meet only to experience the sweet joy of the departing kiss, as well as the hello kiss. We kiss when we awake, we kiss before we fall asleep. We kiss in our shops, in the cafe next door, in the street, at the grocery, when company is over, when we are company at someone else's home. We kiss in the way that people kiss in black and white movies - with meaning, slowly, with passion, but still with a bit of decorum. I don't think anyone would be embarrassed by our display.

A kiss is a little love letter sent out to the world. An intention, a prayer.

May we never run out of kisses.

New Year, New Projects

2007-01-05T15:51:00.000-07:00

Well, '06 wound down nicely, capped off with a delightful supper with friends at the amazing Invite restaurant and bar in Bigfork. A 5 course meal, with different wine pairings each course - just the right combinations of flavors in just the right amounts. Didn't end the meal ovesuffed or over-imbibed at all. Just pleasant.

'07 opened equally beautifully. My Pilot and I slept late (til around 8am or so), then had blueberry pancakes and sausage. Bathed, dressed, and then just stayed home. It was the first day off together we've had in abotu 6 months or so, not counting the 5 days we took to see my grandson after he was born in October. And it was the first day off for both of us on which we did no errands, didn't get into the car and go anywhere at all. It was simply heaven.

I knit, of course. Finished a pair of Knucks for my dear friend Colette. Swatched for My Pilot's Branching Aran from Norah Gaughan's Knitting Nature. Milled about. Cast on a pair of Trekking socks, toe up, for My Pilot. Sat on the sofa. Petted the kitties, wild and otherwise. Simply the perfect day.

For this year, I've got a series of projects already lined up - Rowan's Aelf from Magazine 40, in a beautiful terracotta rose shade of GGH Bel Air from the stash. (This is one lovely yarn - soft and lofty, a single ply, a joy to knit, the stitches look so smooth and even, with still a touch of rustic style.) A pair of shooting socks for Colette's husband, Corey. A few squirrels for my grandson and my niece. And about every other new pattern that comes out.

But my main project, my "epic" project, will be My Pilots aran sweater. SO much searching went into finding just the right pattern. Some were too busy, most were turtlenecks. Almost all were written for worsted or heavier. And My Pilot is one hot guy - literally. He needs lighter weight sweaters, less wool, more cotton and silk. So the Branching Aran pattern is pretty perfect in every way.

I had already obtained a suitable (I thought) quantity of Elsebeth Lavold's Silky Wool in color 40, a medium golden khaki. It is considered a DK weight, and the sweater pattern called for Wendy Guernsey 5-ply, a fingering weight 100% wool. I was pretty sure I could get the required 29 sts/4" gauge on ribbing and 28 sts/4" gauge over the cable pattern. I swatched and kept feeling like the Silky Wool wasn't giving me the density of stitch I wanted - even the ribbing, knit at 7.5 stitches per inch on size 2 US needles seemed sort of open and floppy and uneven. I swatched some more. Did some math, finally determined that I'd be about a single skein short for the sweater, and moved on to swatching some Elsebeth Silky Tweed instead. Even though it is described as knitting at the same gauge as the Silky Wool, it's a multiplied yarn and seems less tightly bound than the Silky Wool, so takes up a little more space. I had DH look over the available colors on Webs, and he chose a beautiful light grey shade, which I think will be gorgeous on him. And the finished item will be much nicer, too. Now I'm just waiting on some size 4 bamboo circs for the cabling, since my Denises on size 5 were just a bit too large.

So far this year, I've learned some new things - Tubular Caston, courtesy of Anna Bell's wonderful tutorial; Norwegian Purl, since it was mentioned on a Knitty Board; that I DON'T like Addi Turbos (even the size 1, which was millimeterly equivalent to about the size 2 bamboos I have, gave me a very loose and sloppy and unpleasant and unhappy looking 1x1 rib - I'll try them on something else later); how to read a cable chart (my secret - color coding the sections so I have somethng other than a symbol completely unrelated to anything in my lexicon to guide my actions). Probably a few other things too. I'm making it my knitting goal to incorporate more unusual techniques in my knitting in an effort to elevate the finished items. Plus it's sort of cool to be in a knitting group or class and start to knit backward when working short rows, or do the Norwegian Purl thing and amaze people.

My friend Diane will begin her first pair of socks this winter - we'll get together next week to begin. I gave her a beautiful skein of Mountain Colors Bearfoot in Alpine, a blend of deep teals, blues, purples and honey. Really beautiful. And she's going to work that into something delicious for herself.

Spreading the knitting bug whenever I can.

On the tango front My Pilot and I will be in Spokane at the end of the month for a tango workshop - our first ever. I'm really looking forward to it, and hope he'll be ok. He is a very fine dancer, and I love nothing more than the feeling of his hand holding mine, his arm wrapped around my waist, his cheek pressed firmly against mine, as he swirls me around a dance floor. But I know he's only learning tango because I want it. What a tremendous gift he gives me with every single dance!

Last summer we had a kid named Jake working for us at the hotdog stand. Every morning Jake would come into the shop, every morning My Pilot would ask Jake how he thought the day would go. And every morning Jake would answer with the utmost enthusiasm, "I have a good feeling about today!!"

We adopted that tactic ourselves - and on the mornings we remember to set the intention by saying (with utmost enthusiasm), "I have a good feeling about today!", we would in fact have a tremendously good day, in so many ways.

I have a good feeling about this year!!

ps - Pics to come, sometime. Of something. Of everything! So much went out of here unphotographed it's not even funny. I want to do better this year!

Glorious Sock

2006-11-14T15:21:00.000-07:00

Dear Sweet Wife,
I sit here now, my marriage solidly certified with my fine and glorious sock,
and think of so many good days to come. It makes me happy that we can joke
and tease constantly even if the world around us spins with unsubstantiated
and reckless seriousness. More importantly, my one foot is very warm and
life is good. Love, m

Well, that's really something, isn't it? A love note. Stirred by a single, solitary sock. And a sock that might well be the single ugliest sock in the world.

But not for long. I am busy knitting its mate - even an ugly sock has a perfect-for-it match.

This is actually my first sock ever. It is Knitty's Widdershins. This is a fabulous pattern - toe up, with a magical cast on that is easy, secure, non-fiddly. A beautifully turned shortrowed heel, slip stitched along the back. Options for cables, which I took because I haven't knit cables yet and thought this would be a good place to start before I begin my epic Cabled Riding Jacket from Teva Durham's Loop d Loop. Anyway, the pattern is awesome!

The yarn, not so much. It's KnitPicks Memories - something I picked up on a whim planning to do something for small children from it. And here it is in its african violet/spring garden glory - all purple, fuschia, apple green and buttercup yellow. On a large sock it makes for a bunch of single row stripes of highly contrasting colors.

And in cables it's just plain fug. I did know that going in, but I figured since it was just a "test sock," it wouldn't matter.

So I sat on the couch and knit and My Pilot looked over and asked what I was making.

"A sock," I answered, Click click click.

"For who?"

"I'm not sure yet - it's pretty ugly." Click click click

"Could it be for me?"

Stop the clicking. I turned and looked at him, reclining back on the couch, his pixie feet propped on my lap. "Sure - but it's really a pretty ugly sock. Would you really wear them?" (It's important for you, gentle reader, to understand that My Pilot is particular about his socks - he likes midweight Thorlos in grey, khaki, or navy. He does not like other midweightsocks, nor does he enjoy wearing Thorlos that are lightweight or heavy, or colors other than those already mentioned.)

"Yes I would wear them. I would wear them all the time," he said earnestly.

"You wouldn't have to wear them all the time. Just once."

"Can I really have them?"

Well, of course he could have them. Sweet soul - how could I resist.

And so I knit away, and finally finished the first sock. It was ugly, but structurally sound and fit him reasonably well.

I slid it onto his dainty dancing foot - pixie-like, as I already mentioned. Man was that sock ugly! He was so happy, he beamed.

"That's one ugly sock. In fact, I think it might be about the ugliest sock ever knitted. I'll make you some good socks that you can enjoy wearing - in fact, when we go to town on Thursday I want you to pick some yarn, and then we'll find just the right pattern for it."

Wiggling his toes happily and gazing at his sweet foot clad in a mishmash of color and texture, he said, "But I want another one just like this!!"

I melted. And today at work he took his single sock and showed it to way too many people - Nan at the cafe, Catherine (a wonderful knitter herself!!), Don, Jean at the gallery across the way from ours. I melted again.

And then he took some pictures - And Blogger isn't cooperating, so I can't even show them to you right now. But I will get them up, and you are most certainly free to make disparaging remarks about this unattractive sock.

Slow knitting and stash organization

2006-11-06T14:30:00.000-07:00

I'm still toodling away on my MIL's Cinxia from Knitty - needing to do some sleeves, but just nothappy with how my slip stitch pattern is working ou in the round. I'll need to try it again from the beginning and see if that makes a difference...somehow the little purl bumps aren't lining up nicely and giving me the lovely staggered textural action they did on the hem of the sweater. Oh well.

That said, I have organized my stash, with the aid of Trillian's Yarn Stash Spreadsheet. It's an excel file available on her blog - look on the right hand sidebar. She is brilliant - she's got a page for yarn stash listing (with all the pertinent info), a page for future projects (including recommended yarn and space for your intended subs), and a conversion page, so you can go from ounces to grams, meters to yards and back again. Brilliant, I tell you!

I got *almost* all my yarn cataloged in there - sock yarns haven't been added yet, but I don't have that many of them. So far I'm up to 40,785.89 yards of yarn. Should be plenty for a while, right? And I've got only a few dozen projects listed. I'd really like to go back through the last few years of the knitting mags I've accumulated, plus all my books and downloaded patterns and get them in there. Each day I bring another short stack of book and magazines to the gallery, and duifully flag the designs that intrigue me, enter the info into the spreadsheet and so on. The one final step (for me) would be to figure out how to link the Projects page to the Stash page, so I could perform a cross sort function and have the results delivered to me - which designs I've noted could possibly be worked up in the yarns I've got on hand, given tension and quantity constraints? It's been far too long since I've done spreadsheet stuff, and I'm not certain I could noodle it out at this late date, but it would be a neat option.

I think I'll also create a fourth page to catalog my needles by material, size and length too. While plowing through the skeins and balls tucked into a rolling cart, I found 3 brand new Addi Turbo needles, size 2, 40" long. Magic Loop? Socks on Two Circulars? Who knows what I was thinking. I don't even knit socks.

Yet.

Almost a month ago I entered my sub for the new
Yarn Forward Magazine. The same day, I also ordered the two current booklets in English from Phildar (France). I've been racing to the mail box every day for the last week and a half, hoping to find delicious, sophisicated little parcels from Europe. Nothing yet.

I'm dying to swatch up some Madil Rebus for a sweater for my daughter - it's a soft and gentle merino boucle - picked it up for a song in both a garnet variegated and a sapphire variegated colorway. I'm liking Artful Yarns Cropped Jacket, although I'd lengthen it a little and make the sleeves narrower, perhaps.

So many projects I'd like to do. And so much yarn. And still...

a girl wants MORE!

Shae's First Sweater

2006-10-28T16:26:00.000-06:00

Oops - a pic of the sweater I knit him would be nice!

I finished the neckband while I was there, so it didn't get blocked properly. But it looks sort of cute. A very big opening for easy on and off over a baby head!

I am a GRANDMA!

2006-10-28T16:02:00.000-06:00

And I am so happy. My daughter did a terrific job of having a baby - cruised through labor, delivered a healthy 7 lb 6 oz boy on October 18 at 10:42pm.

My pilot went to visit Bri and Eric and meet Shae Michael last week. And it was WONDERFUL! Bri is doing well and is happy and feels very centered. Eric is a super nice guy, and obviously devoted to Bri and the baby. And the baby - oh, what can a too proud grandma say other than "I am in LOVE!"

So, without further ado, here are a handful of pictures - just a few. And no doubt, many many more to come!

A new family - imagine what a good looking kid Shae will grow to be!

Shae Michael and a very tentative Grandpa

Shaemouse awake - doesn't he look like he's about to say something?

It's hard to remember that people start out so tiny!

Now I just can't wait until they can all come up for a visit, or I can go down again. There is talk about them moving to Portland, OR, which would be considerably closer to me. And probably more pleasant for the kids, too. But on the other hand, Eric's family is all right there within miles of him and Bri and Shae, so there is lots of family support to be had. Which is a blessing, too.

And in knitting content, I've been SO busy this summer. My two nephews both had babies - one little girl named Halle and one little boy named Aidan. both got variations on the Daisy cardi from Knitty - pics when I can find them, although I didn't get a picture of Aidan's fly fishing embellishments. And my littel sister is due to deliver any time now. For her little girl, I'm thinking a Trellis cardi, also from Knitty, in a soft heathered rosy pink Cascade 220.

Been away far too long

2006-10-28T15:47:00.000-06:00

And so much has happened.

We made it through Summer well and happy. The galleries are doing well.

We started and completed a total remodel on the kitchen. Is it ok to be in love with a range? My Pilot treated me to a terrific Thermador gas range, six burners and a convection oven. Stainless steel. So beautiful. And NOTHING BURNS OR STICKS!! Even in my stainless All Clad cookware. Not even rice. Perfect every time. Cookies aren't burnt to a crisp and the oven temperature gauge is spot on to the thermometer I bought to double check it. Heavenly!

We got two cats from the Huane Society. My Pilot fell in love with the picture of one, who was striped like our beloved Muffin Man was. We went down to visit, and were told, "Poor Finn- he's a year and a half old, and he's been with us for a whole year."

Naturally we had to adopt him.

Then the volunteer said, "Well, he has a brother, you know..."

So we took Austin, too. We renamed him Bug because he's small and grey and curls up like a roly-poly pill bug when you pick him up.

The kitties took a super long time to settle in. They liked the house and the other cats right away, it was just me and my Pilot they couldn't stand. We started referring to them as "the Brothers Grimm." They'd sit in their little cat pod and scowl at us. And I swear we saw them flip us the bird a time or a thousand.

Turns out these were feral kitties. An important bit of info we had to find out upon reading the September issue of the Human Society newsletter, which had a short article about the "special people" it takes to adopt feral kitties. I think by "special people" they really meant "soft-hearted, gullible idiots." Oh well.

And then, one night, the door blew open and all 4 kitties escaped. They are all indoor cats, and we were frantic trying to get them herded back inside. Three of the four were fairly readily replaced inside the house. But Bug went missing.

For six weeks. 42 whole days. And nights. And many of them were cold and rainy and miserable. And we have eagles, owls, bear, coyotes, foxes, racoons and all sorts of critters around for whom a small kitty could be a tender, tasty meal. We were frantic. Put posters up all over the neighborhood. Put flyers in ALL the mailboxes in a three mile radius. Offered up a $100 reward. Set gentle traps in all the likley places and baited them with catfood, kibble and sardines. And nothing. Well, we did catch the neighbor's cat once, and we watched a mouse harvest kibbles for a while. I'm sure there's a big stash under the footing of the house, and a whole colony of very plump little rodents working through it. Oh well.

Until October 13, 41 days after Bug went AWOL. We got a call from a fellow on the other side of the runway. He said, "I think your cat has been hunting in my field."

My Pilot rushed over and actually saw bug! Hurray! We moved the traps over, and by 10am the next morning we had our Bug back. His brother Finn was thrilled!

Truthfully, both kitties benefitted from their separation - I think they never individuated, or perhaps they share a single soul. Anyway, in Bug's absence, Finn began to look to us, his people, for physical contact. And now we can pet him. And he purrs, for the first time in his life, according to the Humane Society folks. Bug returned home just a bit thinner and hungrier, but otherwise unhurt. He's a bit calmer and also now lets us pet him. Just a little bit, but still - what an enormous breakthrough!

And the best part of the summer - I am now a grandma!

And that certainly deserves its own post!

Falling in love all over again

2006-06-04T13:51:00.000-06:00

It's almost our fourth anniversary, and I am more in love with My Pilot than ever before. Here then, in a spirit of sentimentality and tenderness, are the latest reasons I fall in love with Michael again every day:

1. He brings me lunch at the shop. Every day, without me asking. And he fixes it up just the way I like it. Today was a half a cheesburger from the newest and greatest restaurant in Bigfork, MT, the Invite. It's an amazing burger replete with frizzled onions on top and beautiful bacon throughout the burger itself, served up with homemade Yukon Gold and Sweet Potato chips sliced extra thin. Delicious! And I feel so loved and nurtured when Michael walks into our little shop with plate, napkin and beverage in hand.

2. He indulges me in my yarn acquisition. Example conversation from a few days ago:
Me: Sweetie, can I get online and buy some blue yarn since everyone we know is having baby boys?

Michael: Of course - you don't even have to ask. Get whatever you need, then get more.

(This is a real, verbatim transcript of our conversation - can you even believe it?)

3. He jumps to help with my knitting fiascos and seems to really empathize when something goes awry. This morning I frogged about 20 rows of my sister in law's Soleil tank because I had neglected to do four repeats of an increase. That amounts to 24 rows. I was unraveling and trying to catch the stitches on a new bamboo needle that was so not smooth on the tip, it wasnt' even funny. Cotton yarn on snaggy bamboo is such a bad setup. I cursed, and he ran out to the hangar and came back in with fine grit sandpaper so I could smooth the tips. Then he looked at the sizeable pile of ramen-looking cotton yarn on the floor and said, "I'm so sorry you had to undo all that. Thank you for doing this for my sister." He gets it, the whole process thing.

4. He is supportive, indulgent, funny, kind, generous to me and to others, tender, gentle, patient, strong, and willing to fight for me and for us and for issues that are important to us.

And there are so many other reasons I could give, and examples I could cite, but this is enough for you, for right now. Suffice it to say that any woman would be fortunate indeed to have Michael for a husband, and I'm just so lucky, and rather floored, that he picked me.

Family Portrait

2006-05-24T10:57:00.000-06:00

Here is a photo of the three babies - The Muffin Man in the back, wearing white underwear and a striped sweater, Twink sitting like a princess also toward the back, and her giant brother, Squeak, in all his unwashed glory in the front.

Sexy Knitters Club Somewhat Cowl KAL!

2006-05-22T14:53:00.000-06:00

I'm so happy to have done my first ever knit-along wth the lovely ladies at the Sexy Knitters Club. There were two patterns to choose from - the Somewhat Cowl and Orangina. I chose Somewhat Cowl because I struggle terribly with knitting a lacy pattern. I love how it turned out!

This picture is pre-blocking - so there's a bit of rippling along the neckline and the cowl ribbing is pretty bunchy. I soaked the sweater overnight and pinner her out this morning - I think that will take care of both issues.

While I loved the pattern and am super pleased with the finished item, I'm glad to now be able to move on to something else. At times it felt like I was knitting penance on the never-ending ribbing! Now I'll move on wholeheartedly to my Sister In Law's Soleil tank, which I'm only 8 rounds into but hope to zoom through in a short time. A whole bunch of baby knitting - one great niece or nephew coming up very soon, another in October, a niece or nephew and a grandbaby in late October, too. Plus my Mother In Law's Cinxia and a few other things, too. I'm hoping to join the next Sexy Knitters Club knitalong in July, too - depends on what pattern is selected, I suppose. Also, our summers are so incredibly busy from June through October, my knitting time will be pretty scarce. Oh well - for now I have the joy of a Finished Object!

2006-05-14T11:53:00.000-06:00

I have decided through all the experiences of the last few days that God is softening my heart so that it can more easily expand to contain Love - all the love that can exist in the world. I have also decided that I must work toward being a vessel for His love, and that it is my purpose to spill that love onto everyone and everything with whom I come into contact.

Friday, the day after the sentencing and the death of the Muffin Man, My Pilot and I were very blessed by so many people, friends and strangers alike, who touched us with compassion and tenderness and brought the comfort of love to us. I believe there are angels among us all the time, bringing messages from God to each of us. Sometimes the angels take human form, for a moment or so, touch us and remind us of the love and beauty of creation, and then slip away. We were visited by so many angels in the last few days, and we are both very blessed by their presence. I mentioned this to one of our angelic visitors, a beautiful and kind woman who came to our shop and talked of her own kitty children, including one who was in the process of dying and one who has gone missing. She left and then came to visit me in our second shop, and I shared with her my gratitude for her kindness, and my belief that she was an angelic messenger from God. Her eyes welled up, and she thanked me saying, "Not many people can see who I am." Even angels need validation and appreciation.

In our five years together, Michael and I have met many angels, and many more people whom we would characterize as perhaps inadvertent messengers and vessels for God's love. There was an angel in human form present when we met on an airplane five years ago - he had an empty seat beside him, but I passed it up to sit beside Michael. Periodically throughout the flight, he would look back at us talking and laughing and smile. He followed us off the plane, and kept reappearing periodically at the airport, as we sipped sparkling water and waited for the shuttle which would take us to our destinations. It really felt he was checking on us, making sure we would figure out that we were meant to be together.

We've had God's messages delivered by the post office right after my friend Dawn was murdered. Dawn was our mail carrier, and it was fitting that she and God could effect a very gentle and loving letter being delivered right when we needed it most. It came from a woman in Southern California, thanking us for helping her to choose something for her daughter, who was ill. She had chosen a petite pendant by one of our artists that carried the message "Be the change you wish to see in the world," by Ghandi. In her letter she explained that as her daughter opened the little box, the mother started to say the quote, and her daughter finished it. It so happened that this quote was her daughter's favorite, and one which she was living by daily, even in the throes of her illness. The woman closed her letter saying, "you do make a difference." In our hearts we believe this was Dawn letting us know that she felt our love.

We've been sent beautiful spirit communicators and clinical psychologists both carrying the same message - that our loved ones are not gone, that they are safe, in school and learning what they must to go to the next place, wherever that might be. That has brought such comfort to my aching heart. And "just normal people" have brought tender words and soft hands to hold for a brief moment.

I have a snippet of a song running through my head - "Just Like Heaven" by The Cure. The part that sticks for me is the refrain:

You, soft and only
You, lost and lonely
You, strange as angels
...Just like heaven.

It feels to have been written about the Muffin Man

And yesterday we received a sympathy card from our usual vet, not the one who cared for the Muffin Man. The verse on the front read

"Grieve not,
nor speak of me with tears,
but laugh and talk of me
as if I were beside you
I loved you so
'twas Heaven here with you."

Isla Paschal Richardson

The Muffin Man was so deeply, demonstrably appreciative of all the comforts, care and contact we had with him. The nests of hot laundry fresh from the dyer into which he would disappear for an entire day, only the tips of his ears visible over the edge of the nest. The paw massages, which is really how my husband was able to tame this three quarters wild little man when we first found him. He'd stretch out his paws, and his fingers would seem as long as mine. When one little paw had had enough rubbing, he'd slowly pull it back and extend another arm or a leg, and so it would go until all four paws and all sixteen toes had been duly caressed. The little treats of sardines or rare steak, sometimes bacon. Warmth - he was such a cold little guy when we found him in December, when the temperatures were 20 below zero. He'd find a patch of sunlight coming in through the window and settle in to recharge his batteries - he definitely was a solar kitty. All of it he appreciated, and he told us so in so many ways. I can hear him saying "'twas heaven here with you."