dumbchick.com

So Long, For Now

2009-01-11T19:08:00.014-08:00

I'm taking a break from dumbchick.com. This blog has been borderline trainwreck-y for the last few months (You: Borderline?) and honestly, I don't see it getting better anytime soon.

I have been writing here since April 2003, and I don't know if I'm ready to say I'm done writing here for good, so I'll call it a temp-to-perm hiatus. Thanks to everyone who has ever read, commented, or emailed.

If you want to be notified if I start writing somewhere else, or if I begin writing here again after a break, please don't hesitate to email me at mail@dumbchick.com.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

2008-12-22T23:56:00.008-08:00

To meeeeeeeeeee! I mean, you!

I'm a few days into our Mexico camping trip. We left after work on Thursday, December 18th, and we'll be back (late, knowing us) on Sunday, January 4th. I realized after we left that I forgot to update my blog. I can't believe that I even care. But I do, I do.

As an offering that I hope will negate my blog neglect, I give you a grainy, poorly-lit camera-phone photo from last night. Half-assed, it's how we do things here at dumbchick.com.

Honda. Tent. Beach. Gulf of Mexico.

We stopped, briefly, in Phoenix on the way down to see my week-old nephew and the rest of the fam. (Two thumbs way up, he is GORGEOUS. So are the rest of the fam, but we knew that already.) We're in Texas currently, and planning to cross the border tomorrow.

PS - No one ever told me that Texas has drive-through "beer barns". (Tessie, seriously? How did this escape mention?) I want to move here.

Two Things Of Note, One Slightly More Important Than The Other

2008-12-15T21:46:00.003-08:00

1) My sister gave birth to my first nephew on Friday! The whole family is doing great, and we're gonna have the honor of being the little dude's first out of town visitors, as we're gonna swing through town on our Christmas camping trip. We leave on Thursday night now, as opposed to Friday morning to work this into our schedule. No complaints here.

2) I got bangs. Witness:
That picture is horrible. My dining room is not inhabited by supernatural beings and my rack is NOT as large as it appears here. Or maybe it is, who knows. But the bangs! Focus on the bangs!

2008-12-10T22:03:00.004-08:00

It's been a great week. I went to a hockey game with nurses on Tuesday night, went bowling with geologists tonight, and have the Community Council holiday shenanigans tomorrow night. On Friday night we're hanging with Jesse and Sharon, on Saturday night were hanging with Mon (and John? Haven't asked him yet.), and on Sunday night I have to roll sushi for Pat and Jo because that's what Pat and I bet on the Colts/Chargers game (FUCKING CHARGERS).

Then I work for 4 days and then I'm gone gone gone on a camping trip until January 4th. 2+ weeks to do whatever and go wherever we wanna. I'm taking a stack of books, our entire music library, and my guitar. To say that I'm excited for this trip would be the understatement of the year. And it's close to the end of the year so that's saying something. I used my backpacking pillow last night, just because it would remind me of camping.

I'm in a great mood and had a great day today. Coincidence? I don't think so.

I'm excited for 2009. It will be the year I turn 30. I need to set some goals for myself and achieve them. I don't know what I want to do with my life. I know you're not supposed to talk about w-o-r-k on your blog, but it is getting harder and harder not to.

I don't know where I want to go with this website. I'm going to think on it and will report back. I'm tempted to use it for an outlet for writing. Not life journal type writing, just writing. In which case I will move the life journal type writing somewhere else. Maybe? If you read and you don't comment or email and you want to be kept abreast of any changes, now would be a good time to comment or email so I know to keep you in the loop. Thanks for reading/caring/being awesome. Smooches.

Funny Cause It's True

2008-12-08T21:54:00.001-08:00

(The Scene: 10pm on Monday night, downstairs)

Ami: I don't feel good.

Chris: Let's go upstairs and go to bed then.

Ami: Emotionally I don't feel good.

Chris: Let's go upstairs and snuggle then.

Ami (dubious look): I'm from the Midwest.

Chris: Let's go upstairs and not talk about it then.

Ami: Okay, that'll be good.

I Suck At Updating

2008-12-07T21:24:00.005-08:00

See, what happens is that I have SO MUCH to write about that I don't know where to start. So I don't start at all. And then I have even more to write about. And then I'm even more inclined to avoid it entirely. (Sililoquy: I used to do this with my homework in college, now that I think about it. I would have a massive Comp Sci project due and feel like I was behind already, so I would avoid it, which led to me being more behind, which led to me avoiding it more fiercely. In the end I would always get it done, but it probably wasn't as good as it could have been if I hadn't avoided it for so long. Such is the case with this blog, oy.)

So, bullets:

I still need to post pictures from Thanksgiving.
I spent the week after Thanksgiving (okay, Monday and Tuesday) getting my life back together, ie, working out, shopping for food, loving the cats
We went to John's house on Wednesday to pick up a Christmas tree and four adults spent an hour watching old Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake videos on the internet. The only person not watching them was the 13-year-old boy in the house. What does that say about us? Him?
Thursday night was so much fun. My fabulous friend Jessica called me 15 minutes before I left work to see if I wanted to go to Harry O's in Park City because her brothers were showing their movie there. Of course I did, so Jessica and her friend Joan picked me up after work. It was an awesome crowd and I had such a great time. We stuck around for some of the band that played afterwards (Joan knew one of the guys in the band) and then came back to Salt Lake City to see a bluegrass band at the Urban Lounge, which is, happily, 5 blocks from my house. The band was okay, but I had actually seen the band that opened for them at Burt's Tiki Lounge a few weeks ago , and I loved them. It was nice to see them again, they are definitely the best local band I've seen. I ate a drunken 2 am burrito (it's been a looooooooong time since I've done that) and thanked gods that I didn't have to work on Friday.
We went to a wine tasting, hosted by Joanna and a friend of hers, in the Avenues on Friday night. We've been to a few of these events, and they are always fun. In the summer we walk there, because it is only a couple of miles away, but it is decidedly no longer summer, so we cabbed it there and back. It was nice to have a night to drink and chill with my husband.
We skiied on Saturday, and I had a really good day. It was one of those days where my mood coming down the canyon was noticably better than my mood going up the canyon. Chris and Me on the lift. Further evidence that I'm a joy to be around. (Hey, at least it isn't the gagalicious "kissing picture" that seems to be the trend with ski lift self-portraits. *shudder*)

Journey Back Six Years With Me

2008-12-01T21:30:00.008-08:00

I am far too tired to recap the Minnesota trip right now, but I will later. Short version? It was great. Some impulsive decisions are the right ones.

In lieu of a recap of Thanksgiving Weekend 2008, I give you a couple of pictures I found from Thanksgiving Weekend 2002. (Click for full sizes.)

Yes, that is a cigarette in my mouth. CLASSY.

Steph and I at the bar in my hometown. (Deer trophies, god help us all.) I haven't been back to my hometown since.

Steph spent a lot of time that weekend listening to me talk about "The Cute Boy" at work. (I have a sickness which prevents me from calling anyone I'm fond of by their real name.) Six weeks after those pictures were taken I asked Chris out for New Year's Eve, and my life would never be the same. That sounds melodramatic, but it is true. I'm so glad he said yes.

(Are you done barfing? Okay, good.)

Looking back on myself in these pictures, I think he knew what he was getting into. And he still said yes. Maybe he isn't as smart as I thought he was...

What? You Don't Listen To The Beatles

2008-11-25T20:40:00.008-08:00

and wallow when you're sad? Well you totally should.

And when that doesn't work you should impulse-buy plane tickets to visit your bestie from Comp Sci school for Thanksgiving. Ohhhhhh yeah, baby! We are leaving for Minneapolis tomorrow after work for some much needed Sean and Charlotte (and baby-to-be) time.

In the spirit of Thanksgiving (and also because I was such a downer yesterday), I give you...

Things I'm Thankful For Today (A Stream of Consciousness List, by: Ami):

Old friends to whom you can say anything and know that they will still love you.
An email from a reader in Canada today. I love it when people comment or email to "de-lurk", it totally makes my day. I see the number of hits to my site and I wonder who you all are.
Pizza and beer at The Pie tonight with Jesse, Sharon, Nick, Hannah, Steph and Tom.
My upcoming 17 day camping trip, see also: The fact that I have someone whom I can't wait to have all to myself for 17 days and The fact that I have someone who can't wait to have me all to himself for 17 days.
A girl I haven't seen since I was 12 years old finding me on Facebook.
Oooooooobama, and the hope I feel when I think about him leading our nation,
A coworker that is so genuinely nice to me ALL THE TIME. I pick on him constantly, and yet? He goes out of his way to do nice things for me and make me laugh. I think he's trying to kill me with kindness or catch me with honey or something. (And it totally isn't working, I am a jaded, mis-trusting bitch, but this is the THANKFUL list. Back on task! *clap clap*)
Headbands. I've totally been rocking them lately.
Chris. I have never seen Chris judge anyone. I have never felt like there is anything I can't tell him. He always makes me feel like it is okay to be exactly who I am. Being with me isn't easy. I'm "a handful", at least, and more trouble than I'm worth, at most. Every single day I think to myself that I don't deserve this amazing person in my life.

"And In The End...

2008-11-24T22:30:00.005-08:00

...The Love You Take Is Equal To The Love You Make"

Having a bit of a rough time, y'all. Ruminating. Or something like that. Missing someone with whom I would normally talk about these things. Gaining others to talk to but questioning my judgment now. Wondering if it will all end badly. Will deal. Life motto = "This is far from the worst thing I've been through." Funny, it is true in EVERY situation. Team Suck-It-Up Uber Alles. xoxo

EAT IT

2008-11-23T16:24:00.003-08:00

We went to the library today, and I happened to have my camera handy to snap this little gem of a note on a sign about fare increases in the parking garage. (Click for full size.)

LOVES.

I Think We Need An Intervention

2008-11-21T23:15:00.004-08:00

(The Scene: Chris and me, side by side on the couch with our laptops, both of us on Facebook.)

Chris: Can I borrow your power cord?
Ami (pulling the power cord from her computer and handing it to Chris): Sure, here.
Chris: Thanks.
Ami: I think this is the Facebook equivalent of sharing a needle.

Old Crow Medicine Show

2008-11-19T21:39:00.009-08:00

Chris and I went to the Old Crow Medicine Show show at the Depot on Tuesday night. (You are probably thinking that all we do is go to shows, and lately, you would be kind of right.) It was fucking amazing. We waited to get tickets at the door, and I'm glad we got there when we did because the show sold out. I'm really happy for them that they sold out a weeknight show in Salt Lake City, because that's just great.

While bluegrass isn't my favorite genre (although it is up there), Old Crow Medicine Show is probably my favorite band of all time. They are amazing performers. There is no bullshit with them. They don't have an opening act, they don't drink onstage, and they go on within an hour of start time. They line up, all five of them in a line like it's a recital. They are just crazy-talented and that's what it is all about. The crowd at their shows is like no crowd I've ever seen. People are just...reverent, for lack of a better word. There is dancing and cheering and "collective effervescence" for sure, but the crowd is out to absorb this shit like it is a Sunday fucking sermon. It is really a sight to behold.

We saw them almost exactly a year ago at the same venue. When they took the stage I said to Chris "They look so much OLDER." I expected him to laugh at me, but he said "They really do." (Except for the bass player, who still looks like Beavis.)

Most of the stuff they played is from their new album, which came out in September. They played a few songs from their self-titled album and couple from the one that came out after that. I was most excited to hear them play "Next Go 'Round", cause that is just kind of my song as of late. "On my next go 'round I'm gonna keep it to the dreams we knew before I broke them down...I won't let you down on the next go 'round."

In keeping with my camera phone obsession of late, here is a pic of the band:

And I guess I took a picture of my cowboy boots in the reflection of the train window on the way home. Yes, I had been drinking:

I <3 Burt's

2008-11-16T21:21:00.006-08:00

Grainy, poorly-lit iPhone photos are the only way to properly capture a PBR Tall Boy moment. Also? How hot is my husband?

On Friday night we went to see El Ten Eleven with John and Monica at one of my favorite bars of all time, Burt's Tiki Lounge. Burt's probably ranks in my top 5 favorite bars EVER. It's a dive, which should go without saying because only dives rate with me. But the thing that seperates a good dive from a bad dive is pride, and Burt's has pride.

The first time I ever went to Burt's was in the fall of 2001, when I was a wee slip of a 21-year-old girl. It was Election Day, and I was there to see the band of a friend of a friend. (Utah liquor stores are closed on election day. This will be important later.) I walked up to the bar and the bartender asked me what I wanted. I said "Do you have Crown Royal?" (I was going through a Crown Royal phase.) He turned around and eyed the shelf of liquor bottles, spotting a bottle of Crown with maybe 2 shots left, and said, "A little bit. I forgot it was election day today and I didn't go to the liquor store yesterday." I fell in love with that place then and there.

I went with large cans of PBR on Friday night. (PBR isn't a phase, it's a lifestyle.)

Ami: Can I get a can of PBR?
Bartender: Big or little?
Ami: Big. There is only 1 right answer to that question.
Ami (to John, Mon, and Chris): These are called something... TALL BOYS! They are called Tall Boys. Or they were in Iowa, anyway. I never know if these things are universal or regional.
Bartender (professorially): That is the proper nomenclature.

LOVES.

Mickey Avalon Show = Exactly What You'd Expect (WIN)

2008-11-13T22:24:00.009-08:00

I went to the Mickey Avalon show at In The Venue on Wednesday night. This has been the most hotly anticipated show of my entire year . Chris and I met Monica at our train station, and Pat hopped on at his stop. (Can I just say how great it is that we all live easy walking distance from the train? I love this city.)

There were 2 opening acts, Beardo and Dirt Nasty. Beardo was already on when we arrived, and wow, he was horrible. Monica said that listening to him made her think that she could have a successful career in rap.

I attempted to get 2 giant PBRs from the bar, and the bartender told me that he could only give me 1. I said "Oh, okay. I just wanted 2 because I know this first one will be gone in 5 minutes." He laughed at me and said "If you drink that in 5 minutes then come right back to the front of the line and I'll serve you right away." Heh

Dirt Nasty went on and grabbed his crotch 4 times in the first 3 minutes. We used his time on stage to focus on drinking beer so we'd be good and buzzed by the time Mickey Avalon took the stage. Or maybe that was just me.

Mickey Avalon went on, and wow. The sound was horrible, and the show was STILL great. He looked exactly like I thought he would (aka, I thought he was hot and that disturbed the hell out of me). The whole show was ghetto brilliance. He had skanky, not-hot dancers and terrible props. Chicks kept jumping onstage and getting escorted off by security. I witnessed at least 2 fights first-hand, and was left feeling like I don't have nearly enough tattoos.

It was a great night, and a really cheap one due in part to the bartender that decided to give me my drinks for free for the second half of the night. He told me to just "find me and we'll make out later". I'm really broke right now so I appreciated that so much. And the whole thing just made me laugh, because "make out"? How cute and innocent is THAT?

And speaking of innocent, on the way home, at the train stop, some girls asked Monica and me if we go to the University of Utah. We said no, and she said "Where do you go?" We said "We don't." She replied with "So you just hang out?" Something like that, sweetheart. I didn't tell her that I graduated college EIGHT YEARS AGO next month. I'm gonna tell myself that she was just really drunk.

I snapped a few pics with the camera in my celly telly because that's why god invented camera phones (click for full size versions). Mickey Av:

Trashy dancers (LOVES THEM):

And because I am powerless to resist them, DELTS (god almighty, how does someone so skinny have such sweet delts? Mmm.):

A Big Fat No-Shitter Of A News Flash

2008-11-11T23:04:00.008-08:00

(Alternate Title: Things You Should Have A Handle On Before The Age of 29, See Also: A Spine and A Shred Of Self-Esteem)

People are not dick-less losers who let other people control their lives. People do exactly what THEY want to do. If someone wants to be your friend, they will be. If they aren't? They don't want to be. If someone tells you they want to do something but can't? They're just telling you what you want to hear (read: lying). If you feel as though you know someone really well and then their actions are in direct opposition to those you'd expect from the person you thought you knew? You didn't really know them in the first place. If someone says they care about you and then acts like they don't? THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU.

I always give people the benefit of the doubt. Or perhaps it is less the benefit of the doubt, and more just seeing what I want to see. I have a hard time admitting when I am wrong, or when I feel hurt or angry or betrayed or slighted. I feel as though it reflects badly on me. It makes me question what kind of a judge of character I am. It makes me feel as though instead of spending time getting to know someone, I should have seen the signs and known better. Feeling lied to is hard; feeling lied to and knowing you really believed it all is even harder.

But the truth is what it is. Actions speak a hell of a lot louder than words. I need to start living my life like I know this.

The Last Few Days

2008-11-10T21:04:00.006-08:00

My in-laws came to town! We went to a Jazz game on Friday night. I had so much fun. I love basketball games, hell, I just love sporting events in general. (And I am hands-down the most fun person with whom to attend a sporting event, but you probably would have guessed that.) Then again, I'm from a small town so you can pretty much take me anywhere and I'll have the time of my life. You have to make your own fun, people. If you aren't having fun, you probably aren't fun. ANYWAY, pics in lieu of content! It's the game we play around here.

Long-suffering Chris, pretending that he loves it when I make his hair static-y with the blow-up clapper things:

In other news, Kyle Korver is TOTALLY biting my style. Observe (L: Kyle Korver on Friday night, R: Ami in a parking garage last Wednesday):

Yeah. Get your own style, buddy.

We ate, shopped, played Yahtzee (at which I kick ASS) and went to a hockey game on Saturday. I believe the technical term for all of that is "dicking around". The game was really high-scoring for a hockey game, and there were an adequate number of both $9 beers and fights.

Chris' parents left on Sunday morning, and on Sunday afternoon I went skiing at Snowbird for the first time this year! I am remarkably bad at skiing. Also, how does one get lost when there are like, 3 lifts open? But it was a beautiful day, and I was in a shitty mood when I left the house and in a great mood when I got back. I'll take it.

Tonight (Monday night) I went to Squatter's for drinks and dinner with my dear friend Jessica, and GUESS who I saw? Nope. Former Salt Lake City Mayor ROCKY ANDERSON. I think he is stalking me, you guys. I see him everywhere, and I am always there first! I think he has an elaborate network of spies, tracking my moves and informing him of my whereabouts so that he can just happen to show up and attempt to get me to notice him. (Note: It is working. He was looking fine tonight. Mmm.)

Way To Go, OBAMA!

2008-11-05T20:38:00.019-08:00

I voted for the winner for the first time ever! In keeping with the keynote of this website, let's make this election all about me, shall we? This is the third election that I have been old enough to vote in. Let's recap the others:

2000: (dream sequence blurriness, picture me as a college student in a short skirt and chunky heels) I was 21, and SO excited to finally get to vote. I was living in Iowa and I went to the polls at the Johnson County Courthouse with the guy I was dating at the time (let's call him J). J wouldn't tell me who he voted for and I spent the day trying to get him to slip up and tell me. (We dated off and on until 2002, and he never did slip up.)

I voted for Gore. I stayed up until 2am waiting to find out who won, and I remember J saying "I'm gonna go to bed and when I wake up there will be a NEW president!" Except that there wasn't, not for another month. I felt SO RIPPED OFF. That was the year that a lot of would-be Gore-supporters in Iowa voted for Nader. Bush won Iowa, and the election.

2004: I was 25, living in Utah, and I went to the polls by myself, before work. Oh wait. I don't have to recap 2004 for you because I had this here website then! This is what I LOVE about having a website. You can see the picture I posted the day of the election here, and read what I wrote about it here.

If you are too lazy to click those links (Although you should, cause lookie how cute my bare-bones HTML is! And I was seemingly opposed to capital letters! And they give people like me the right to vote!) then here is the picture (Taken in the bathroom at my condo. I captioned it "HELL YEAH"): and here is the text:

thursday, november 4th, 2004
politics

yes, i voted. no, i didn't want bush to win the election.

in college, my friend owen and i would play a game in which one person would present the other with two bad choices (ie, would you rather watch a porno with your parents or a porno with your parents in it?), and that person HAD to pick one of the choices. we called this game, appropriately, "the two bad choices game". this election seemed like the ultimate in "the two bad choices game" for me, so i voted for badnarik. if i lived in a swing state, i would have cast my vote for kerry (despite my belief that he wouldn't have been a much better president than bush) but i live in utah. utah is a hardcore republican state (bush got SEVENTY-ONE PERCENT of the vote in utah) and i knew my vote for kerry wouldn't be crucial, so i chose to support a third party candidate. no, i didn't think that badnarik would win. no, i didn't vote for him to make a statement. i voted for him because i thought he would make a good president, and that's all there is to it.

I would have bet my entire 401K at the time that there was NO WAY that Bush would have won that election. I still don't know how that happened. It is like a sequence of events that happens when you are drunk. You can try and try to remember exactly how it happened, but you'll never quite figure it out. You just have to accept it and put it behind you. And possibly lay off the sauce, AMERICA.

2008:
Chris and I got to the church on the corner of our street at 6:55am to wait for the polls to open at 7am. (Sadly, this was sleeping in for us since we usually get to work at 6:30am. I've come a long way since 2004, when I was a 9am-er, on a good day.) There were probably 10 to 15 people in line, and I passed the time by inquiring loudly of Chris "Honey, who am I gonna vote for again?? I can't remember! Who did you tell me I'm supposed to vote for?" and watching the horrified looks on the faces of the people around me.

I voted for Obama. I was anxious and excited all day at work, and I don't even know how I stuck it out until it was time to leave and go to Monica's election party. It was a great crowd, and I had SO MUCH FUN. We drank champagne and watched speeches and partied in the street when it started snowing and got yelled at by a neighbor who was probably just pissed cause he voted for McCain.

I thought I should recreate the 2004 devil horns photo. I think I'll take one every election year and watch myself age. That'll be fun. 2008 (taken in the bathroom of our house, for consistency): And because you have to keep reinventing yourself (in my friend John's bathroom): (Observations: My brows are better and my hair its natural color now. I've also traded the nose hoop for the nose stud. Also, I actually appear groomed in 2008, as opposed to the lycanthrope look I was rocking in 2004.)

But my bathroom picture fetish aside, I couldn't be happier about this year's election. I expect that it will be one of the best election memories of my life. Here's to the next 4 years. Cheers! *clink*

Chivalry Is So Dead, You Guys

2008-11-03T23:11:00.006-08:00

Chris (via text message, of all heartless things): "Your shelf in the closet fell :( "
Me (in person, a half hour later): "My shelf fell!"
Chris: "I know."
Me (playing dumb): "How do we fix it?" (Editors Note: Me playing dumb in this situation is particularly hilarious considering that I built the closet in the first place.)
Chris: "Well you're gonna have to get a couple of new anchors."
Me: "Will you do it?"
Chris: "No."
Me: "Oh, come on!"
Chris: "You know how to do it."
Me (desperately trying to think of something that only I know how to do): "Okay, how about you go make us some Indian food and I'll fix the closet."
Chris: "Okay."
Me (annoyed that he isn't playing along): "You don't know how to make Indian food!"
Chris: "I'LL FIGURE IT OUT."

Have I mentioned how much I love it that Chris doesn't put up with my bullshit? Chivalry? Is hot. Calling me on my bullshit? Is so much hotter.

And just cause I know you love it, here's another Chris/Ami convo, cut and pasted from a chat client:

(7:57 AM) Chris: You up for a football game Saturday? I was thinking I'd try to get Utah/TCU tickets if I can.
(7:58 AM) Ami: Oh. I thought that game was on Thursday night?
(7:58 AM) Chris: Oh. Yep. It is.
(7:58 AM) Chris: Good catch.
(7:58 AM) Ami: Well check me out.
(7:58 AM) Ami: A fount of college football knowledge.
(7:59 AM) Chris: We're not worthy!
(7:59 AM) Ami: Woah, it is 1992 all of sudden?
(7:59 AM) Chris: In my mind, I never left it.
(7:59 AM) Ami: God help us all.
*5ish minutes pass*
(8:03 AM) Chris: Def Leppard "Two Steps Behind" just came on the ipod. Ahh, the early 90s...
(8:05 AM) Ami: That was TWENTY FIVE YEARS ago
(8:05 AM) Chris: That would be 1983.
(8:06 AM) Chris: "Math is hard"
(8:06 AM) Ami: Oh
(8:06 AM) Ami: Right

m-e-t-h-o-d MAN

2008-11-02T16:13:00.015-08:00

OH MY GOD METHOD MAN TOUCHED ME YOU GUYS. Wait, okay let's back up. I just had to get that out there. Ahem.

Thursday: After the day that reduced this steely-hearted Midwesterner to tears, I came home to an empty house and was feeling pathetic and sorry for myself. I thought about going out for a drink, but I am broke and also figured that I would probably just end up forcing a poor, defenseless stranger to listen to my troubles all night. I decided to spare the stranger and stay home and carve a pumpkin instead. (WTF? I don't know, your guess is as good as mine.) Guess who I'm voting for???

Friday: I think 2008 will go down as the Best Halloween Ever, because METHOD MAN TOUCHED ME and how the fuck do you top that???? We saw Method Man and Redman at the Murray Theater, and it was a really good show, if a little "promotey", but hip hop shows tend to be. It was packed. Halfway through the show it occurred to me that I have a camera in my cell phone, so I took a picture. Holy 2004, Batman!
It is worth noting that there is no zoom on my cell phone camera. I was so close that when Method Man jumped into the crowd he jumped over my head. Also? He is one sweaty motherfucker. I couldn't help but think all kinds of nasty thoughts, but this is a family-friendly website so I will stop there.

Saturday: I finally mowed our yard. It had probably been 8 weeks, and I'm not exaggerating. (I asked Chris is he thought that the neighbors would cheer if I mowed our yard and he said "I don't know, it'll be hard to hear them over the sound of MY cheering." Heh. I love that asshole.) Saturday night we had a bunch of people over to chill, including the new neighbors, referenced in this post. Peter Brady brought over some really good Scotch, so he is now not only my favorite neighbor but my new best friend.

Sunday (aka, today): Firstly, it is my Roxanne's eleventh birthday!! That's all I'm gonna say because I think I need to write a whole post about that.

Tonight we saw Zack and Miri Make A Porno. It did such a good job of portraying both the 10-years post high school phase of life and the sometimes-complexity of male/female friendships. It just made me sigh with the spot-on-ness (shut up, that's totally a word) of it all. But above all it was fucking HILARIOUS, as only a Kevin Smith movie can be. Highly recommend, get thee to the theater, yea verily.

And I Don't Cry

2008-10-30T20:41:00.013-08:00

I had a really, REALLY bad day today. It started early, and I just couldn't shake it.

Then I had a meeting in the afternoon, during which a couple of guys made a totally innocuous joke at my expense, something about me choosing the color pink for a portion of a diagram that I'm creating. I quite obviously love pink, and on a normal day it would have made me laugh and I would have totally gone with it.

But today it just got to me. I normally feel like it is all in good fun, and that when it comes down to it I have people that love me and that have my back. And I didn't feel like that today. I felt like a friendless leper. I felt like I am just a huge joke. I tried to shake it, I put on a happy face and sucked it up for the rest of the day.

And then I cried all the way home.

Wendy? Darling? LIGHT OF MY LIFE.

2008-10-29T21:54:00.007-08:00

We just got home from watching The Shining at Brewvies with Steph and Tom. It was the "last Wednesday of the month free movie" for October. I've seen The Shining at least 10 times before, but never on a big screen. It is such an amazing movie.

We saw Back To The Future there last month, and they had an honest-to-god Delorian out front. (I don't think I mentioned that here. But I got to sit in a Delorian!) Anyway, so when we pulled up tonight, Chris said "Damn, I was hoping they'd have a Snowcat out front." Heh.

I think the highlight of the night for me was when we were leaving the theater and Brewvies' own Scotty was standing in the doorway saying "REDRUM! REDRUM! ... Thank you all, you were ALL heroes!" Free movie, beer, AND an affirmation like that? These are the things good nights are made of.

Don't You Wish You Were Married To Me?

2008-10-28T21:36:00.010-08:00

(There is only one correct answer to that question, by the way. And you have to say it with a straight face.)

Tonight I "rolled some sushi like a good Indian wife". (That phrase is copyright Joanna. You're probably not surprised.) The um, fish planes (just go with it) come into Salt Lake City on Tuesdays, so we got some super-fresh fish tonight. Chris had the night off from school and it has been a while since I rolled sushi. I will say that it was really good, and I'm my own worst critic when it comes to cooking. I actually rolled twice that amount so we'd have lunches for tomorrow. Check me out, suddenly I'm a paragon of planning ahead.

I had a really good day. I had grand intentions of going to bed early with the hopes of ensuring another good day tomorrow, but I've already stayed up late doing administrative stuff for this here website.

And speaking of which, for those of you who care: I signed up for Twitter a while ago and then didn't really use it because I'm not online enough, BUT! Today I set it up so that I can Twitter via text message. So I'm going to start using it again and those of you who have been accusing me of being technologically behind (you know who you are) can just GET OFF MY BACK and follow me here.

So feel free to bookmark that shit and revel in the knowledge that I have succumbed to peer pressure. Let me know when you're all jumping off that bridge, k? I wouldn't wanna miss out.

Guess Who Won "Best Costume" On Friday Night?

2008-10-26T20:34:00.013-08:00

Me, bitches!!! And also, have I mentioned how much I love working 4/10s? Very much. I love it very much. Let's back up.

Friday:
Got up at 8am to get ready to have breakfast with my work friend, Melody, who just had a baby 3 weeks ago. She is out on maternity leave, and while that is most decidedly Not Okay with me, she seems to be doing it anyway. Hmph. So I had breakfast with her, her husband, the cutest baby evah. I had something on my mind that I wanted to talk to them both about, and I felt so much better after I did. They are so spiritual and non-judgmental. Just those kind of people that make you feel okay to be yourself. They are a couple of years younger than me, but I definitely look up to them. Such great people. The highlight of the day was when I accidentally dropped the f-bomb in their house, and in front of their baby. (They are Mormon.) Nice, Ami. They didn't care at all.

I left their place at lunchtime to go and have lunch with Steph. Yea verily, I am a Lady Of Leisure. We drank a beer at her place, ran a couple of errands, and had lunch/early dinner at a brewery, where there were both more beers and apple streudel. Did I mention that I gave myself a week off from both running and eating well after my half-marathon? Well I did. The result? WIN. Except, when did donuts begin to cost EIGHTY-NINE CENTS?

I dropped Steph off that evening and ran home to get ready for a Halloween party at the house of Monica's bandmates. I was a firefighter, and while I loved my costume, I didn't know anyone else would. And then I won Best Costume, HOLY SHIT!!!! For real, I don't think that's ever happened before. I don't think I got a full-body shot, which is unfortunate because it involved hot boots, but I will wear it again this Friday, on real Halloween, so I'll try again. This is probably the best pic of me and Chris from the night:

Saturday:
I'm a complete sloth and so I won't tell you how late I slept. For real, usually when I say that I will actually tell you if you ask, but this time? No. Unless you buy me some whiskey. In which case, lean in close, honey...

ANYWAY. Chris is awesome and scored us an invite to a Diwali party. For you uncultured folks, Diwali is the Indian New Year. Just so you know, in the almost 8 years that I have lived in Salt Lake City, I have never gotten an invite to a Diwali party. No, I just get to go as the date of the cowboy. Nice, right?

The party was AWESOME. I didn't know anyone who was gonna be there except for Chris, so I didn't know what to expect, but we met so many cool people. I was even recruited to play the guitar on an Old Crow Medicine Show song, OMG!!!!! Seriously, did I dream that? I love playing my guitar, but I generally don't do it for other people, and if a) they hadn't needed someone to step up and b) I hadn't had a few drinks, I don't think I would have done it. But I'm SO glad I did. I haven't had that much fun in a long time. They asked me to stick around an play another one with them, so obviously I wasn't horrible. Chris says it was great, but he is biased cause he loves ~~my tits~~ me.

Sunday, aka, Today:
I was contemplating mowing the yard when Steph called to see if we wanted to hike up City Creek Canyon with her and Tom and their dog, Bailey. Of course we did, so I got ready in a hurry (Chris was already up because he's got it together like that). It was a beautiful day, one of those summer/fall hybrid days that you can't predict or take for granted. Me, Tom, Steph, and Bailey:

Steph and Tom came over afterwards for snacks and beers (well beer is a snack) and after they left I made some delicious dinner and ate it with Chris. After dinner, Jo came over. She is freshly returned from a trip to Poland and we gossiped like people can only do when they haven't seen each other for two weeks. She said "next time I go on vacation I will go for less time." Let's hope she's serious.

Other:
I know I sound better than I was, and to some extent I am. I'm trying not let that make me lose sight of the fact that I need to get some help, and I am. Getting help. It is painful, and I think honestly that it will get worse before it gets better. This is harder than quitting smoking, and that is saying something, because quitting smoking made me its BITCH.

The Half-Marathon Experience

2008-10-23T19:29:00.002-08:00

The Place: Moab, UT

I had to get up at 5:15am to get ready for the race. Jessica and I ate some breakfast, met up with a couple of her friends who were also running the race, and then headed to catch the shuttle to the start of the race. As I sat there in the freezing cold morning, tired, with an hour-long shuttle (read: school bus) ride in front of me so that I could then run 13 miles, all I could think was: I paid for this privilege. The first-world is such a strange place.

After we arrived at the start we had about an hour to wait until the race would begin. We killed time by waiting in line for the bathroom and marveling at how cold it was. The hour passed very quickly and people got ready to start. The thing about starting in the back of the pack that is so awesome, is that no one is a serious runner and there are so many fears being vocalized that it is funny and makes you feel better. I laughed out loud when a girl behind me said to her friends: "Oh my god, what if I start CRYING???" It was just so HONEST.

So the first 2 miles were a total blur. It went by so fast and I just couldn't even think about anything. Miles 2-6 were like a normal run, if faster and a little more frantic. I checked my watch at mile 3 and realized that I just set a new personal 3 mile record. By mile 6 I was no longer in the personal record zone, but still doing very well for myself. Then at mile 7 the uphill nightmare began. It was almost all uphill for a mile and a half. At mile 8.5 I wanted to lay down and die. At mile 9 I wanted someone to shoot me. Then I hit mile 10 and was like "Oh, less than a 5K to go!" and all of a sudden it was fine. I never thought I would hear myself say "Oh, only 3 miles", but there you have it.

When I hit the finish I had a great song on my ipod, and I drew this hilarious connection between the song and the fact that I was running a race and a Stuff White People Like entry and I was totally cracking up. I had a huge shit-eating grin on my face when I crossed the finish, and I was just so happy to be done and happy that I did it. I wanted to stop and watch Jessica run in, but I had to keep moving, so I walked for a while and then claimed my beer (free beer for runners!) and hung out in the grass with everyone for a while. I found my neighbor who ran the race, and chatted with him for a while.

My mom called about an hour later, which meant so much to me I can't even express it. It was really nice that she wanted to know how I did. I was surprised and happy, and honestly it made my day. We ate lunch at the Moab Brewery (the other brewery there SUCKS) and Chris agreed to drive home so I drank a couple of damn good beers and reveled in self-satisfaction, heh.

I really want to do another one. There is a Mardi Gras half-marathon in February, and I am SO, SO tempted.

Off The Edge Of Your Seats, Everyone

2008-10-19T21:13:00.002-08:00

So the half marathon is over. The weekend was fun. We met up with a few friends in Moab, there were 4 of us who ran the race, plus spouses and others, and it was a great time. I was really, really worried about my state of mind, and while I did feel distracted, I worked through it and had a good time during the race.

My goal time was 2.45. I finished in 2.48:46. So not quite, but close. Story of my life. I feel okay about it. The course was really hilly, way moreso than I expected. There were moments that made me question my title as self-appointed president of Team Suck-It-Up. At mile 9 (after a mile and a half of uphill) I wanted someone to shoot me. I was pretty sure that I was going to survive, but I was certain that I would never be the same. But then they handed me a beer at the finish and I was back to the same old me. (You: THANK GOD.)

I did a lot of thinking on the way home, and I decided: I am done doing things out of fear and paralysis. I always say "I've never regretted anything that I have done. I've only regretted things that I haven't done." And while that is true, it makes me wonder if I haven't taken the right risks in life. So I have "step one" and while I'm willing to share it, it involved That Which You Do Not Blog About, so you'll have to send me an email if you want to know.

Along the same lines: I know I've been vague and angsty lately, and I don't want to be that way. I will tell you straight up that my problem lately involves my struggle with depression. Events have occurred lately, the details of which are not important right now, but they have brought to light my issues with depression, and I'm ready to admit right here and now that I have them. They are affecting every area of my life, my recent problems are a direct result of those issues, and I need to deal with it all head-on. It is terrifying, but I have no other choice. This is going to question my presidency of Team Suck-It-Up for sure, but what's a girl to do?