Too many Ideas

This Blog Has Moved

2009-07-03T22:19:00.002+01:00

Too Many Ideas has now moved into my rebuilt impworks site.

Please Mind the Gap

2009-07-01T00:54:00.001+01:00

I'm in the process of switching my web site to running on wordpress. A lot of the hard works done but there may still be a few bits I've not quite finished moving properly and there may still be the odd problem for a couple of days. So in the mean time Please Mind the Gaps when Boarding the Train.

Things that make me go eh?

2009-06-29T18:52:00.002+01:00

Bought new pots and pans today from John Lewis after spending months trying to pick ones I liked. I'd spent ages looking for pans that were oven proof. It didn't say they were on the top but on Saturday I discovered that along with exactly the same information that was on the top of the packaging there was just one extra important technical information - Oven proof to Gas Mark 4!

Thats not what made me go eh? though. The pans just had the information on the top. The frying pans had a photograph to brighten them up. If you were looking for a picture to make a frying pan more attractive you might choose one of bacon or sausages or maybe a couple of golden fried eggs. Not whoever designed this packaging. No they design the packaging for frying pans and they think: sliced carrots.

Rolf's Lyrics Explained

2009-06-25T12:54:00.001+01:00

Maybe they should have tied the wallabies down as well as the Kangaroos because it sounds like they're high as kites.

268 Links Sitting in a Database

2009-06-22T22:28:00.002+01:00

I rebuilt the Vue Links Directory from one database to another yesterday as part of finishing off a complete rebuild of the impworks site into WordPress. There were 268 links to migrate and while the basic move was handled easily I then had to work my way through and do some data cleaning to improve the quality of the directory on the new site. I've been working at it on and off for a couple of months now and its getting closer and closer to being done. One last push in the next few weeks and it'll be done and I'll be able to get on with adding stuff to it more easily.

Tweeting Hash Codes Batman

2009-06-17T23:27:00.001+01:00

I'm not really a twitter user, I've got an account but while I'll post a certain level of boring mundanity here I'm not into the recording the minute up to the minute stuff. I just don't think it or I'm interesting enough and while blogging is probably a bit weird tweeting just goes over the line. Odds are I'll get into it about the time something new takes over in microblogging: in the same way I bought a PDA when they were about to start the slide to obscurity as netbooks took off.

Anyway today I've been doing some work on Twitter at work to get a live feed of tweets onto a site during a streamed video from a conference. It would have been absolutely straightforward had I not run into something a bit obscure to do with hash codes. Our friends at the vinspired wanted a hash code #generationdigital. Fair enough everythings up and running to pick it up and display it on the site. Except it just wasn't showing up. After some messing around we worked out that the presence of digital in the hash code for some reason stopped it being picked up by searches. #digital exists and works. #digitalXXX seems to be OK too. #XXXdigital or #XXXdigitalXXX is right out. #XXX-digital or #XXX_digital also work but just feel a bit clumsy. No idea why digital runs into a brick wall or if other words can do to. Anyway, since the hash code hadn't been publicised in advance we decided to just use a different hash code.

One odd little discovery along the way though was a hashcode in German that left us a bit puzzled. Our, admitedly school boy quality translation, was that the hash code would have been #nocheesecakeprincess_digital. The mind boggles.

Radio 7 Heinlein

2009-06-15T23:13:00.002+01:00

Discovered Radio 7 is doing a series of readings of abridged versions of Heinlein short stories. Forget the endless discussion of his politics which too often ignore a lot of the "meaning" in the stories in favour of having an easy bash at something the analyst doesn't like (and sometime miss that Heinlein made it sound bad which may have been his intention). its short stories like Ordeal in Space and next Sunday's The Green Hills of Earth along with his juveniles that got me into Heinlein's writing.

Krod Mandoon and the Flaming Sword of Fire

2009-06-12T11:56:00.000+01:00

I owe the creators of Krod Mandoon and the Flaming Sword of Fire a big thank you. A couple of months back I wrote a script for a 30 minute radio sit com more by accident than intention. I had an idea one morning and seven hours later I had 6,700 words written set in a generic fantasy world. I'd been struggling to work out what wasn't right with it. Having watched the first episode of Krod Mandoon I've now got some pretty good ideas about what not to do.

First Terry Pratchett has produced so much comedy fantasy since 1983 that you've got to work hard at it. Its not like Pratchett, with 55 million books sold worldwide, is some sort of secret, niche author that a good chunk of your audience won't have read. So a wizard who can't do spells needs something to make them special if they won't be unfavourably compared to Rincewind. The same goes for pretty much any cliche character you decide to use.

Anachronisms in fantasy settings also need to be clever - be it a character's with 20th century attitudes or one suggesting going for counselling. Stoppard did it far better in that little known film Shakespeare in Love (Worldwide Gross $279,500,000).

And if you're going to have a narrator that everyone in the scene can hear you're going to have to push the boat out a bit and take a real run at the third wall and go way past Up Pompeii or Hustle to make it be funny - its been done before.

Which left humorous names, which tend to wear thin pretty fast (except some of the ones the Python team pulled off), the silly jokes - in the style of airplane (which made me laugh to be fair) - and the below the belt jokes - which I have no objection to but I prefer them to be funny. Still its a fantasy show so dressing your attractive female lead in leather, make their character just a little promiscuous, say Xena Warrior Princess a hundred times, and hope it will save your ratings (and make sure your male star will go down well with the ladies too).

So I'm going to be taking a red pen to my script and cutting or reworking anything that's like that and a whole line of jokes about an ass I was thinking of adding are not getting anywhere near the script either.

Maybe it didn't help that several review I read compared KM to Red Dwarf which builds an expectation. Red Dwarf wasn't highly polished but it was funny. KM on the other hand was very polished but, at least as far as I was concerned, wasn't very funny. However I'll be fair to them the one hour format and it being the first episode might mean it wasn't their best work. I'll watch at least another couple of episodes of Krod Mandoon and the Flaming Sword of Fire. At worst they'll give me some more pointers on what not to write.

Too Many Things

2009-05-26T21:58:00.003+01:00

I think I need a few extra hours in the day - if I did each of the following would probably be its own post...

Having finished a fascinating book on illegal gambling in the UK in the '50s I started reading the first volume of Michael Palins' diaries on Saturday and there a great read...

One unfortunate combination of words set an idea for a humorous, slightly strange Murder Mystery short story idea off and I wrote the first four pages yesterday...

That stopped me finishing the longer game writing project thats so close to having a complete first draft its bugging me...

So I was going to tackle it in the evening but I got an e-mail with an offer from Cornucopia3D for GeoControl2 which I've been tempted by for a while. So I ended up playing with that instead...

Plus Kim's got a new novella out, Flesh and Shadows, with a very cheesy cover but I'll probably give it a read because despite the cover its supposed to be Science Fiction not Mills and Boon...

Oh and having decided not to take out a subscription to the new version of Pyramid magazine because now its themed of the first six issues I'd only found three I was interested in. So inevitably the latest issue is one I wanted to pick up...

Then there's the vue video tutorial from Quadspinner I want to write a review of for my Vue News Blog...

I'm just glad that The Wire (which is good but not as good as some of its exponents would like us to believe) is on three nights a week so I know when its finished its time to get some sleep or I don't know how I'd know to end the day.

There and Back Again and Again

2009-05-14T22:29:00.002+01:00

Two trips to London this week for work - Today and Tuesday. I didn't feel so tired coming back tonight but its just hit me and I feel like I've run into a solid wall of exhaustion and my throat feels like someone ran a sander over it. I'm glad its Friday tomorrow and I've no plans to do anything at the weekend, I think some sleep may be in order.

It'sTrek Jim - Just as we Know It

2009-05-10T00:37:00.004+01:00

But maybe there was a twist of something in the Romulan Ale.

I was pretty happy with J.J. Abrams take on Mission Impossible so I had high hopes for the new Star Trek film. I think I can safely say it didn't disapoint. The cast played the characters rather than doing impressions of the original actors playing the characters. The effects were impressive. There were lots of nice touches for the fans without making it impenetrable for anyone who hasn't watched all the gazillian hours of TV series and films plus read the various technical manuals. The plot made sense, which is always a plus point, even though it involved time travel.

It's late so I'm going to leave it at that. Excellent film.

Update: Dark Dwarf has posted his impressions of Star Trek.

The Onion on the New Star Trek Film

2009-05-06T12:50:00.003+01:00

Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film As 'Fun, Watchable'

Curried Black-Eye Beans

2009-05-04T20:32:00.003+01:00

Tried this out earlier in the weekend and enjoyed it so thought I'd post it tonight. The quontities here are for it as a side dish for a wet curry or light meal with Chapatis.

Serves 4. Serve hot or cold.

150g Black-eye beans soaked in a bowl overnight
2 tbsp Oil
2 Medium Onions
1 tsp Fresh Ginger root finely chopped
1 tsp Fresh Garlic crushed
1 tsp Chilli Powder
1 tsp Salt
2 tsp Ground Coriander
2 tsp Ground Cumin
150ml Water
2 Green Chillies
Fresh Coriander
1 tbsp Lemon Juice

Rinse and soak the black-eye beans overnight.
Boil the black-eye beans in a pan of fresh water over a low heat for about 30minutes.
Drain the beans.
Heat oil in a pan. Add the onion and fry until golden brown.
Add the ginger, garlic, chilli powder, salt, ground coriander and cumin and stir fry for 3 to 5 minutes.
Add the water to the pan, cover and cook till the water has evaporated.
Add the black-eye beans, green chillies and coriander leaves to the onion and stir.
Cook for 3 to 5 minutes.
Sprinkle with lemon juice.

The Panzerfaüste Song Book

2009-04-30T23:22:00.002+01:00

Just sent off the finished draft of the The Panzerfaüste Song Book to Ragnarok.

A Short Back and Sides

2009-04-28T23:21:00.002+01:00

A Short Back and Sides was a scenario I wrote for Kenzar & Company’s Fairy Meat which appeared in the SFSFW's journal Ragnarok back in issue 33. Funnily I've had three different people request copies of it in the last month. Its been around for years and I don't remember anyone asking for it before. So I dug the files out, converted the ones that were in odd (by today's standard) file formats and assembled a PDF of it which can be downloaded from my web site.

A Short Back and Sides (367KB PDF)

Finally an Espresso in a Book Shop I Want

2009-04-28T12:10:00.000+01:00

I'm not a coffee lover but I am a book lover so I sometimes find the replacement of shelving with books on in book shops by trendy coffee area a bit annoying. Blackwell's Charing Cross Road now has an espresso machine I have no objections to.

Spotted on WWdN: In Exile

Chicken in Chardonnay and Peach Sauce

2009-04-26T23:22:00.002+01:00

I'd not done this in a while but I cooked this for my dinner tonight.

60g Butter (Unsalted is best)
2tbsp Vegetable oil
4 Chicken Breasts
8 spring onions chopped
300ml White Wine (Chardonnay)
4 tbsp Clear Honey
2 tbsp Lemon Juice
4 Fresh, ripe Peaches stoned
250ml Double Cream
2 tbsp Cornflour mixed to a paste with cold water
Salt and Fresh Black Pepper

Melt the butter in a large pan with the oil
Add the chicken breasts to the pan and brown them off
Remove the chicken breasts and set asside
Add the spring onions to the pan and saute for about 1 minute
Add the Wine, Honey and Lemon juice to the pan
Season well and stir
Return the chicken breasts to the pan
Cover and simmer for 25 to 30 minutes
If the liquid reduces to much add a little water
While the chicken is cooking roughly chop one of the peaches
Blend the other three peaches in a food processor till smooth
When the chicken is cooked remove it from the pan and set to one side
Add the cornflour to the sauce and cook for a couple of minutes till it has thickened
Over a low heat add the blended peaches, chopped peach and cream to the pan and stir
Heat gently but do not boil the sauce
Put the chicken on a plate and cover with the sauce
Serve with green vegetables and plain white rice

Be Very Very Quiet...

2009-04-24T23:08:00.004+01:00

I was walking home tonight from work and walked into a street I walk down most nights. Now its not winter there are usually people in the street when I walk down it. Tonight isn't unusual there are kids playing in the street, someone is unloading their shoping from a car and two girl who have a basket ball are occasionally passing to each other across the street while they talk. Three more girls turn into the street from the far end, the one in the middle is carrying something but its hard to see what from a distance.

As I pass the ones with the basket ball and one of them yells to the newcomers, "What have you got there?"

The one in the middle of the group of three says something back but its hard to make out what. The first one yells back "What did you say?"

The middle one says something indistinct again and this time the first one yells back "What?"

I'm getting closer to the group of three now and I can see that the middle one is carrying a large, grey rabbit which is casually chewing on the stalk of a flower. The middle one raises her voice a bit "I've got a rabbit Don't shout you'll scare him."

The girl starts to bounce the basket ball on the road and again shouts back "What?"

I was coming up to the three girls now. I could see the girl in the middle was about to reply again but the girl next to her who'se the smallest of the group by far opens her gob and at the top of her voice yells back "Its a rabbit, don't shout you'll scare him and don't bounce that F'ing ball either."

The street went silent for a moment. The girl holding the rabbit unconciously tightened her grip on the rabbit.

I swear the rabbit was the only living thing in the street that didn't react.

The Case for the Defense of British Grittiness

2009-04-16T19:20:00.003+01:00

I've just seen another talking head piece where it was said that Britain doesn't make gritty police shows. I like The Wire but there isn't any need to get into self flagelation that all we ever make is Dixon of Dock Green and Heartbeat. If I swore on this blog I'd use a single word to say just what rubbish that is but I don't so instead I'd suggest the lazy look at a few shows that make their case look frankly stupid...

Z Cars
The Sweeney
Edge of Darkness
Between the Lines
Cracker
Dead Head
Rebus
Waking the Dead
Red Riding

And thats without being able to remember the titles of a couple of British shows including the one where a witness had his nipples ripped off using pliers at the end of the first part...

Ok some of them look tame now, especially the older ones, but for their day they were gritty. I just hope the talking heads who are making their penny today complaining will keep their traps shut and not spout moral indignation when someone makes a British cop show or mystery that sets the bar way past The Wire.

Rhapsody in the Trafford Centre?

2009-04-13T11:43:00.003+01:00

Someone must have been short on ideas when they made the advert for the Trafford Centre I just saw. First some uninspired footage of clothes. Second an innane voice over. Third a script about a formula. Forth add a bit of mathmatical notation to The Trafford Centre's name at the end. Finally top it all off with Rhapsody in Blue trying to fight through behind the voice over. None of the elements had any cohesion with any of the other elements. If you're going to use something like Rhapsody in Blue you've got to pull off something like Manhattan - and I mean the Woody Allen film not the cocktail. Certainly not a shed full of shops with little architectural merit on the edge of Manchester.

All it sold me was putting Rhapsody in Blue on to listen to and maybe watching Hell is a City later because of its unlikely, but successful, combination of '50s Manchester and a jazz sound track...

Consort Review

2009-04-08T22:38:00.004+01:00

Having finished The Translated Man I felt like reading some more fiction so I've just finished reading Kim's latest novella Consort. Skipping quickly past the rather cliched cover. Not that its badly done but it reminds me of racks of second hand romance books in charity shops. At least with an e-book its not there on the shelf for visitors to see and you can skip printing that page.

Its not obvious from the cover (which at least means its not a total cliche - no blood - no fangs) that this is a vampire story. Clearly Kim has gotten past her worries about writing the naughtier bits of romantic fiction. I've not counted but I'd say half to three quarters of the pages could be rated on the Scoville scale. We're not talking Bell peppers either more something in the Tabasco pepper to the Naga Jolokia. Yet somehow Kim manages to keep the plot moving too even in amongst all the main characters hormones. And she subverts her favourite tea related scene into something a bit different this time too.

Back in the 80s the Guardian ran a series of jokes about Amstrad launching weird devices combining different white goods the PC and Tea Maker. I'm wondering if Amazon won't need to release a Kindle with Fire Extinguisher and integral Cold Shower if Kim keeps putting out work like this...

The Translated Man

2009-04-05T23:07:00.004+01:00

Finished reading The Translated Man by Chris Braak yesterday. Since I'm being regularly e-mailed by a web site who've taken to including my posts tagged reviews are included in their review listings where the reviews are in turn reviewed I'm going to do a bit of a Corbett first. While I may tag this as a review it is in fact more of a loose collection of ideas and opinion strung together without any proper, formal review process being undertaken. Nothing that follows is rigorous or properly thought about and in fact its just my opinion in the end. If it were a review (like the ones I wrote for Valkyrie a long time ago) I'd put a lot more effort in even though I know that in the end it is just my opinion and is fairly meaningless after all that.

But to get back to my (not) review...

The Translated Man is a novel available from Lulu running just short of 240 pages in length laid out at a size that means two pages comfortably print to a side of A4. That was a good thing as I was enjoying it so much that I printed the whole of it out so I could read it away from my computer. Thats a first for an ebook I've bought of this length. It was a real page turner so I had to have pages to turn.

The story is an atmospheric police procedural tale that could be said to be steam punk or perhaps victorian fantasy in genre. Its set, mostly, in a city. A city where everything, including the architecture, has been shaped by various power struggles between wealthy families. A city which is struggling under the burden of war and with racial tension waiting to boil over.

The main characters work for one of a number of police organisations in the city, the Coroners. Their specific area is hunting down criminals who comitt heresy including such acts as reanimating the dead. Their colourful staff include a hard bitten detective a the young, foppish junior detective, a clairaudient and the only reanimate ever declared not to be a heresy. All the characters are interesting. Even when at first glance they might have been detective genre or fantasy standards are more than two dimensional cliches.

The story itself has an excellent plot which twists and turns from its in medias res opening to its dramatic finale. It cuts back and forth amongst the investigators. Even though the setting is fantasy it holds together logically and provides enough information to allow the reader to leap to the right (or wrong) conclusions as the events unfold.

It isn't a perfect work. A bit more proof reading would have picked up the handful of places where typos slip through, robe for rope at a dramatic moment springs to mind because it distracted me at a crucial moment in the plot. A few sections where none of the view point characters are present are described in a slightly awkward tell rather than show kind of way. After a fair amount of thought I wonder if might have been avoided by adding a character of a lowly gendarme from a competing police force who could easily have been on the scene at a couple of points in the story and who could have acted as our eyes. Early on in the story there is also a two page info dump about the city's architecture which I can't think of an easy way round. While later in the story dates are given for historical events early on years relative to the main detectives time are give. Not a huge problem but as a reader of detective stories it pulled me out of the story as I started to try and look for clues hidden by the slightly awkward writing when there were none.

Those however are my only criticims of the story. I can't go into a lot of what I enjoyed about it without risking spoiling the story. I did have a small laugh when the characters attend The Bone-Collector’s Daughter given Kim wrote The Bone Magician's Daughter. As I said already - a real page turner. All in all very good.

Marketing not Quite Joined Up

2009-03-29T23:46:00.002+01:00

Littlewoods recently sent me an e-mail thanking me for my business in the last year and hoping I'll continue to spend as much with them this year as I did last year. I may well take their advice - I spent nothing last year and its quite likely I'll do the same this year...

Moondash Showreel

2009-03-23T23:06:00.001Z

Daniel Munteanu's show reel at the Moondash project is well worth a look.

Today Programme Viral Advert

2009-03-20T19:50:00.000Z

I'm a bit late with this but it did amuse me. The Evan Davis' blog on the BBC web site explains it. I found some of the comments amusing just because they say more about the commenters than the piece itself. A few obviously don't get there is a difference between an advert being viral (which it could be if people do things like copying it to their blog) and guerilla (which this isn't).