Journey Through Grace

Yes, you are so handsome!

2009-07-17T05:30:00.000-04:00

Good evening ma'am.
I hope you don't mind my occupying your fence.

Wait, let me show you what I can do!

Isn't my throat patch beautiful... are you attracted to me?
I have to make sure the other Green Anoles know
this is MY fence spot as I impress the ladies, you know.

To say thank you

2009-07-16T05:30:00.001-04:00

My friend Mata posted a wonderful blog entry about the importance
of expressing appreciation to others. As I read her post, it inspired me
to think about what I could do to let people know how much I
appreciate their efforts and kindness. So many times, we are touched
by someone's kindness, but we fail to really let them know how much it meant.

When I take Sam out to eat, the server finds him waiting to order, along
with his Thomas the Tank Engine book. When my big, almost 17 year old, tells
the server he wants "lots of biscuits and French fries" and they
"get" him, it means so much to me. When they knowingly smile
at me, interact with him, and make sure he is well taken care of in
the biscuit department, and even offer a to-go box for later, it
makes me happy beyond measure. How nice it would be to be
able to leave a card on the table letting them know how much
their kindness and understanding is appreciated.
Thanks for the food for thought Mata.

"No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted." -- Aesop

Circling the premonition

2009-07-15T05:30:00.001-04:00

Do you ever have a premonition?
Some might call it a feeling in your gut?
Something is wrong, and you just know it?
I hope and pray my gut feeling is wrong.
I don't want to think of the worst,
but my medical background leads
my brain to places of rationality,
and there are times, I wish I didn't
know so much as a nurse.

At times, being so clinical and rational
makes you face potential facts more quickly.
I won't expound, except to say my worry is not
for me or for my husband, but for my daddy.
Please pray that my premonition is wrong.

Grunt, curse, and repeat again...

2009-07-14T05:30:00.005-04:00

So, the belt on our treadmill was getting pretty worn in the center, and we had noticed it was harder and harder to keep it centered on the deck. We called to order a new one, which arrived last week, but alas, no instructions on how to install it. I emailed the vendor, and a nice service rep, Shane, kindly emailed me the instructions below (with photos). Over the weekend, hubby and I decided to get the belt changed out. All tools assembled, we headed to the basement...

1.Remove motor hood.
Easy enough... two screws, we're done. This won't be so bad!
2.Remove screw from foot rail on each side.
Again, two small screws, and it's off! Man, this is a breeze!
3.Remove base caps on right and left with a Phillips screw driver. (bottom hole)
Get the right angle, and they snap right off. We're cruisin' along!
4.Using an Allen wrench, remove the bolts that hold on the rear roller by turning counter clockwise.
OK, so these puppies are a bit... grrr....tight... but off they came. We are invincible!
5.Remove the rear roller.
Boy this bolt holding this roller on is positioned way down in there.... ugh... finally, it's out.
6.Remove the bolt that holds on the front roller by using two 13mm wrenches.
Uh, that bolt? Down in there? Uh, OK. There's not much navigating room. The &^%* socket keeps slipping off of it.... almost... tongue held just right. Whew. It's off.
7.Remove the front roller.
This sucker is heavy. But, OK, it's off and lined up by the wall with all the other parts and bolts.
8.Slide foot rail to the end of the unit.
Slide? Seriously? How about take a rubber mallet and a yardstick and bang it an inch at a time to get the dang thing to "slide" off? Jeeps. OK, they're off.
9.Remove eight deck bolts, (four on each side) using 5m Allen wrench that came with unit. Take deck and belt off of unit.
These are also a bit.... tiiiiight...OK, almost have them. I have lube all over my hands now...and this deck is very.... awkward to hold... ouch, my toes!
10.Install new belt using above steps in reverse order. Be sure to add lube for new belt.
OK, so we cleaned all the surfaces under the belt deck nicely and vacuumed up all the dust, and we've added new lube to the deck surface. Greasy, greasy silicone. The belt is on! TA-DA! Now, it's time to put everything back together by going backwards with the instructions above! Yay! We did it! It's all back together and we smile and wipe our brows!
11.When adjusting the tension on the belt, turn bolts on each side the same number of times. Start the belt and adjust as needed.
OK! We're ready to adjust the belt.... uh, wait a minute. Houston, we have a problem. Seems... um... that Shane...um... sent the wrong belt. Seriously? Seriously. Alrighty then. Reverse course. Take the "new" belt OFF. Grrrr... serious potty mouth language abounds. Side by side we measure..... it's 2 3/4" too long.
SHANE!!!!!!!?????????????????????

Another wonderful quote...

2009-07-13T05:30:00.003-04:00

(Sunrise in Ormond Beach, FL- 2004)

Another snippet from Barbara Brown Taylor's An Altar in the World:

"Reverence stands in awe of something-- something that dwarfs the
self, that allows human beings to sense the full extent of our limits--
so that we can begin to see one another more reverently as well.
An irreverent soul who is unable to feel awe in the presence of things
higher than the self is also unable to feel respect in the presence of
things it sees as lower than the self, Woodruff says. This raises real
questions about leaders, especially religious leaders, who cite
reverence for what is good as their warrant for proclaiming whole
populations of people evil."

And so it begins

2009-07-12T05:30:00.000-04:00

Uh, well... I'd say we're pretty committed now. :c)
Thanks to everyone for your good ideas and suggestions about
our pool demo/landscaping. Yesterday, we decided to go ahead
and get the tarp off and start getting the liner out. We got started
early, around 9AM, but with the humidity, it soon began feeling like
we were in a cooker. Hubby and I cut the entire liner away from the
pool, and then cut it into manageable strips so we could put in into
contractor sized garbage bags for disposal. There was a sheet of 1/8"
foam behind it, and we found that the side walls are made of metal.
The bottom was a hard packed sand. I won't even go into how nasty
the liner was, especially in places where it was still damp.

We had already planned to take down the fencing ourselves as well.
So, truly, all I need is someone to truck in fill dirt, and maybe a foot
of topsoil for planting. We'll be talking to some people this week to
get estimates on the fill alone and then we'll deal with the landscape plans.
I am just happy we've gotten a good start.
Whew. I am quite the strapping woman, I am!

Sticker Shock

2009-07-11T05:30:00.000-04:00

Gulp. OK, so we knew when we decided to fill the pool in that it was not going to be cheap. I called the landscape person we have used for other projects, and with whom we've had great experiences in the past. She came out at the end of May to look at the area and talk to me about what might work best. Because of the rainy May we had, she and her crew have been behind, and so she told me it might be a few weeks before she got back to me with a plan and proposal. Fine. We had nothing but time. In the meantime, we went ahead and drained the pool of the water so that we did not have a cesspool growing as it got hotter and hotter. We simply kept the area covered with the trampoline tarp.

June came and went and although I was in touch with her several times, she did not have a proposal to show us yet. Husband became rather impatient as June morphed into July, and called her himself the first week of July. She told him she'd have something to show us by this week, and on Thursday called to say she would be by on Friday evening to show us what she'd come up with in terms of a plan for the area.

So, yesterday afternoon late, she came out to show us this beautiful and well thought out plan for the area. Initially, she proposed a "sunken garden" area, but we explained that the sides of the pool are metal, which pretty much means we'll have to fill in the entire area with soil. When she came out in May, she mentioned "re-doing" the beds surrounding the pool which now are a straight line of holly and arborvitae to "soften" the look since we'll be taking down the fencing. But, when she came out yesterday, those beds were not addressed at all. Nope. And as she explained the plan she designed, she said, "I tried to stay within the budgeted amount, but just could not." Gulp. As I looked at the total amount, a good $3000 more than we'd intended to spend, combined with the fact that it did not even include "softening" the beds surrounding the pool, my heart sunk.

We kindly listened to her proposal and then told her we needed the weekend to discuss it, and we'd let her know something by the first of the week. As soon as she was out the door, we both turned to each other with deer-in-the-headlights looks and basically decided that we'd have to go back to the drawing board. I can't even imagine we can't get it done for the money we've budgeted, and so we called a contractor friend, who will be getting in touch with someone he knows to get us a better price on the fill-in and then we'll deal with the landscaping issues. What a disappointment. Nothing is easy I suppose, but money is money, and in this day in time, budgets are a necessity. Stay tuned...

Altars all around us

2009-07-10T05:30:00.002-04:00

Recently, my friend Ginger reviewed Barbara Brown Taylor's new book, An Altar in the World. I was excited to hear that she had a new book out as I thoroughly enjoyed her book Leaving Church which I read last year. When I read Ginger's review, I immediately found the book on Amazon and downloaded it to my Kindle. I am halfway through it, and also heartily recommend it. I love how she focuses on the fact that if we look, we truly can see God in most anything and any situation. Nature as an altar, other people as an altar... altars all around us.

These passages really struck a chord with me as we see more and more bloodshed around the world in the name of religion and belief systems:

"I know that nothing strengthens community like a common enemy. I know that when religious people are feeling overwhelmed by a world with little use for their ancient truths, they can find new meaning by identifying a great evil to oppose. I know that the Abrahamic faiths of Judaism, Christianity, and Islam are especially vulnerable to the formation of "oppositional identity," both because the stories of their struggles with their enemies have been make sacred in their scriptures and because monotheists-- one-true-God-people --have never wasted much charity on those who do not acknowledge their one true God. Here is a law as reliabe as gravity: the degree to which we believe our faith is what makes us human is the same degree to which we will question the humanity of those who do not share our faith."

... "We have just enough religion to make us hate one another, " Jonathan Swift once observed, "but not enough to make us love one another." Because we are human, which is to say essentially self-interested, we are always looking for ways to add a little more authority to our causes, to come up with better reasons to fight for what we want than "Because I want it, that's why." If we can convince ourselves that God wants it too--even if that means making God in our own image so we can deny the image of God in our enemies--then we are free to engage in combative piety. We are free to harm others not for our own reasons but in the name of God, which allows us to feel holy about doing it instead of just plain bad."

So much truth in those paragraphs, no? Kudos to Barbara Brown Taylor for writing a book which makes us all think about how we can better experience "God" in our lives.

Life Lessons

2009-07-09T05:30:00.007-04:00

This email is currently circulating, but I found it lovely and worth sharing for those who may have not yet seen it...
The original email said that Regina is 90, but upon investigating, I found a link to her site
and a correction about her true age. Funny how things get embellished on the web.

********************************************************
Written By Regina Brett
of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio

"To celebrate growing older,
I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.
It is the most-requested column I've ever written.
My odometer rolls over to 50 this week, so here's an update:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
36. Growing old beats the alternative - dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
45. The best is yet to come.
46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
48. If you don't ask, you don't get.
49. Yield.
50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Shoring up the nest

2009-07-08T05:30:00.001-04:00

My sister has some ginormous arborvitae behind her house,
and one night last week, heard a baby bird chirping away near the ground.
She found this rather recently hatched baby on the ground.
Upon inspection in the arborvitae, she found a nest which had
seen better days, with another viable baby still in it.
She shored up the nest as much as she could, put this little
one back in with its sibling, then watched and waited to see who
might come to tend this nest.

The next day, the mystery was solved!
A female Northern Cardinal came in chirping and upset in the
vicinity of the nest. Because the baby was on the ground yet again,
my sister decided to give it a better measure of safety and put the
entire thing down into a Country Crock container. We're not sure if
this was a first time mom, or if something tried to get to her nest, hence
rendering it less sturdy for her babies. None the less, she happily came
back to the nest to tend her babies, and at least now can be assured that
they won't fall out on the ground until they are good and ready.

Fly, baby, fly!

2009-07-07T05:30:00.000-04:00

We were watching the news last night when I heard a bluebird
warble very close by, and it sounded like a baby.
I got up to look out the window just in time to see this little
baby fly from my deck to one of the large pines in the back
as dad chased away something he considered a threat.
This is the second brood to fledge this season, and that
brings the total of new bluebirds on Chickadee to 10!

Beautiful music

2009-07-06T05:30:00.001-04:00

I am always on the lookout for new music. I love the Genius feature in iTunes which
offers other music you might like depending upon what you are currently listening to.
As I have been listening to Catherine MacLellan lately, I have been given other artists
to check out that are similar, and here is one I found just this week. Sandra McCracken
is an artist out of Nashville, and has a very pure and lovely sound. She often sings
along with her husband, Derek Webb, also an accomplished musician. Check them out
in the nice video below and see what you think.
(What is it with all the Mc/Mac singers I am finding lately?) :c)

Macro hopper

2009-07-05T05:30:00.001-04:00

This little guy was on a palm frond in one of my planters on the deck
yesterday afternoon. He was only maybe 1/2" in length?
He caught my eye as I was watering, and when I took these and
then put them on the computer, I was amazed to see all his splendid
detail and multiple colors! I Googled some grasshopper sites and
think he's probably a Scudder's Katydid Nymph?

Independence Day

2009-07-04T05:30:00.000-04:00

(Print by Nat Farbman)

Happy July 4th to all!
As we celebrate our country's birth,
may you have many blessings to
count, and good times to remember
with family and friends.

I want to be Rachel!

2009-07-03T05:30:00.000-04:00

"If I see a road, I'll take off. I don't even know where it goes, and I don't care. I just want to find out." -- Rachel

God love this woman. I want to be her when I grow up!

Sentence Completion Meme

2009-07-02T05:30:00.001-04:00

(Zinnias from my parent's yard back in July 2006)

I am going to owe Jane a royalty of some sort....

Sentence Completion:

1. I’ve come to realize that my last kiss… was born of 20 years of knowing and heeds me a good day ahead.

2. I am listening to… Catherine MacLellan sing to me.

3. I talk… more than I listen sometimes, and always with my hands.

4. I love…life.

5. My best friend/s… are relationships I wish were deeper and closer.

6. My first real kiss… shocked me to my toes.

7. Love is… a decision.

8. Marriage is…something that takes work, grace, and growing.

9. Somewhere, someone is thinking… Michael Jackson's children do not seem to possess any of his genes?

10. I’ll always… see people as individuals and show kindness.

11. The last time I really cried was because… the truth was spoken and it hurt.

12. My cell phone… helps me stay connected on a daily basis.

13. When I wake up in the morning… there is comfort in my routine.

14. Before I go to bed… I read my Kindle.

15. Right now I am thinking about… why this family of Barn Swallows chose my home to roost.

16. Babies are… proof that life will go on.

17. I get on Myspace… uh, never? (Sorry to all those people who send me invites.)

18. Today I… encouraged a brand new Plastic Surgery resident during his first Hand Clinic.

19. Tomorrow I will be… having fun, as I am off and Sam and I will go to lunch after we see the wonderful Dr. S.

20. I really want to be… fully aware and living each day as if it were my last.

Perching places

2009-07-01T05:30:00.008-04:00

The baby Barn Swallows roosting under my porch. :c)

Here is a short video I shot from our dining room window so you can see
where the Barn Swallow babies are perching to be fed and where they were
in relation to the window where I shot yesterday's photos.
As I was shooting it, (sorry for the bad lighting) mom flew to the front
porch and perched on top of one of the columns where she has her babies
roost each night! Meanwhile, dad kept feeding and towards the end of the clip,
flies in to feed one of the three.

Bird's eye view

2009-06-30T05:30:00.004-04:00

The Barn Swallows have come back to the front porch area every evening for several days.
Saturday evening, the babies were perched on a gutter which was just below the windows
in our bonus room over the garage. I grabbed my camera to head up there, and
when I looked down, was looking directly over them. I very gingerly opened
the window and only raised the blind enough for me to get a view from my
camera with me standing up, hence the blinds got in the way in some shots.
But, it was a sheer joy to be there, quietly and reverently watching them.

Looking down over them, you could really see the iridescent
blue in their feathers just really starting to pop over their backs.
(click to enlarge)

They would watch as mom and dad flew by, hoping to be
the recipient of a juicy insect.

And, occasionally, they would simply close their eyes and rest a bit...

only to be reawakened by the chirping of their siblings as
mom and dad came back for some more feeding.

Each evening, mom has corralled them under my porch and they roost there
during the night, all three nuzzled up together until the dawn.
What I wouldn't give for them to nest there next season!

Glistening in the sunrise

2009-06-29T05:30:00.000-04:00

The other morning, the sunrise was peeking around the corner of
the side of the house towards the front yard, and the sprinkler was on.
I looked towards the sunrise and saw this lovely sight of a spider's evening
web constructed at the base of a cherry laurel illuminated by drops
of water and the sunrise...glistening beautifully.

Peanuts in the heat

2009-06-28T05:30:00.000-04:00

I looked out to see this rather tired Downy clinging to the
peanut feeder. She'd eat a bit and then just hang there as
if she needed to gain the energy to grab a bit more.
It's been so hot and so dry... I don't blame her.
It's no fun to eat too much in the heat!

Feeeeed meeeeee!

2009-06-27T05:30:00.003-04:00

The Barn Swallows hung around all evening long and even roosted
under the front porch during the night. One of the adults, seen above,
(mom?) was one busy swallow trying to keep three babies fed!

They moved perch to the gutter just above the front porch around 8PM which
afforded me a perfect view from the bonus room above our garage.
I gingerly opened the window up there, sat in the floor with
my camera, and watched with utter joy as they fed their young...

As soon as they'd see an adult approaching, all three would chitter
madly, lean forward, and open their mouths as widely as possible.
The parents were so fast when they would plunk an insect into the
waiting mouths, that I thought I'd never catch it on my camera.
Finally, after doing a burst of frames, I was thrilled to load
them to the computer and see the image below! Yippeeee!

Barnies!!

2009-06-26T05:30:00.002-04:00

Yesterday morning, hubby turned on the sprinklers in the front
yard to try and revive the crunchy grass. I was on the computer
when I noticed birds flying. I looked closer and realized it was
swallows flying through the water as it was arcing over the yard!

A closer look revealed, not Tree Swallows, but Barn Swallows!!
They flew a while and then landed on the gutter by the porch.

When I walked outside, they began chittering and flying towards me
as I stood on the front porch! Hmmmm... were they looking for
a potential nesting place? I hurried back inside and watched from the window.

I finally had to leave as I was already late for work, but when I came home
and looked outside, there they were again! All lined up on the gutter just
outside the front porch! I was able to snap all these photos from the dining
room window when I got home in the afternoon and realized that three
of them look like babies.

As I continued to watch them, I did see one of them swoop out to get
an insect, and come back to feed one of the three seated together.
What an absolute treat after a long, hard day of work!

Heartache

2009-06-25T05:30:00.005-04:00

I've written in the past about my "little sister" in Germany.
I made her beautiful British acquaintance in February of 2000 when
she emailed me about a book review I did on Amazon. Since that time,
we've been great, fast friends and have been there for one another in
ways I can't describe. She is 15 years younger than me, and I've fancied
her the little sister I never got to have. We've even been able to meet up
twice when she was in the states on business with the bank she worked
for in Munich at the time.

Over the years, our communications have been regular and irregular,
depending upon what each of us had going on in our lives. Lately,
we've not been in frequent email contact as she has been feverishly
working on getting her MBA. I was thrilled when several years ago,
she met someone who has been her steady supportive partner, and
someone that I felt she'd eventually decide she'd spend the rest of her life loving.

So, it was with great joy that I opened my email several weeks ago to
the news that she and her partner were expecting a little one!
My little Rosie... a mommy. Wow. She was so very thrilled and for her
birthday in May, I sent her What To Expect When You Are Expecting
along with a pregnancy journal. She was beaming and I was thrilled for them.

Then, came the email this week... in just the 12th week of her pregnancy....

"We have some very sad news - we are going to lose our baby
at just 13 weeks. The prenatal doctor found a bilateral cleft palate
on the NT scan last week. On Monday they took some blood from
the placenta and today they said the baby has Patau Syndrome (Trisomy 13).
This is such a severe abnormality, that most babies do not survive
long (even a month) after birth and we have decided to end the pregnancy."

Oh, my heart just sank. I can't even imagine the sadness and shock
they are enduring. Please send up some prayers for strength
and peace as they deal with this sad and unexpected loss of their little one.

It's hot in here!

2009-06-24T05:30:00.001-04:00

So, I was driving to work yesterday, lamenting that it was already
in the high 70's at 7:30 in the morning. The humidity has been
miserable. As I drove along, I felt myself getting hotter and more
uncomfortable. Whew, I thought.... let me turn the air down a bit more.
I turned the AC down, and angled the vents directly on me to see if
I could cool off. As I kept driving, I continued to feel so miserably hot.
I could feel the sweat almost trickling down my back and even my behind
felt like it was in a roaster. Boy, if I was this hot this early, I was only
imagining how much hotter I'd feel by the time I headed home in the afternoon.

A few miles later, as I was truly contemplating arctic temps in my car
to cool off, I happened to glance down at my cell phone which I had placed
in the center console, and then fully burst out laughing at myself.

When I took my phone out of my purse and put it on the console, I had
apparently hit the seat heater button. Not only was it on, but it was on
HIGH. I quickly turned it off and laughed all the way to work as my
bottom finally started to cool off and recover from my seat heatwave!!!

Release your inner creativity

2009-06-23T05:30:00.003-04:00

So, back in November, Ruthie of Nature Knitter posted about
how it was her turn to "Pay it Forward" when she received a
homemade gift from a blog friend in Sweden. KGMom responded
that she would love to participate, and so last week she, in turn,
received a beautiful handmade scarf from Ruthie. When I read
about her gift from Ruthie and how it was her turn to pay it
forward, I jumped in to participate as well! What a great idea!
Channel your inner creative soul, and just simply create something
with your own little hands to pass along to someone else to enjoy.

Here are the rules to the "Pay it Forward" exchange:

"I will send a handmade gift to the first 3 people who leave a comment
on this post requesting to join this Pay It Forward exchange. I don’t
know what that gift will be yet and you may not receive it tomorrow
or next week, but you will receive it within 365 days; that is my promise!
The only thing you have to do in return is pay it forward by making the
same promise on your blog."

Since I am not a knitter, my creativity probably will include something
to do with my bird photography. So, who is ready to accept a handmade
gift and release their own inner creativity to pay it forward? :c)