Mascot Manor

Why religion doesn’t work so great in our house

2009-05-28T07:12:00.000-07:00

Why religion doesn’t work so great in our house:

Us: Some people believe that when you die, you come back as something else.
Signa: Yeah, like a ghost.
Us: (stifling a giggle) No, like other things.
SIgna: Oh, like zombies!
Us: (barely holding back) No, more like cows and cats and dogs.
Will: When you are a dog, Momma, you are going to bark and I’m going to spank you.
Us: -------(silently start William’s future therapy fund)
Us: Other people think that when you die you go to heaven.
Signa: (with joy and excitement) OR HELL!!!!
William: Or DAMMIT!!!!!

Who has a yellow belt?

2009-05-24T20:31:00.000-07:00

SIGNA DOES! She was tested and promoted on Saturday for her martial arts class. The instructor said such wonderful things about her that we've all been walking on air. Well, that is until the colds hit us so hard that are heads are too heavy to be held upright for long periods of time.

But she now is a Yellow Belt! Watch out...

Testing testing

2009-05-20T07:20:00.000-07:00

I posted some items and now my whole site is gone. Just testing...

Mister Spock

2009-05-16T14:42:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know that twice in one day is just silly, compared to how often I've written lately. But here's the thing... I have BIG NEWS!

Mister Spock, formerly known as Pauly, has just joined the family today. He was a stray that the owners decided not to pay the fee for at the dog pound... He's small, but big, super mutty, the most beautiful blue eyes and best personality ever.

Update

2009-05-16T09:10:00.000-07:00

I’ve been having a terrible time keeping up with pictures and with writing here. I know I missed telling you all about our trip to Oregon. Signa and I went and had a girls’ weekend (but with Grampa, too, so not really all girls…). We had a fantastic time just being. My favorite thing was watching Signa being fascinated with the different types of moss. All of us got involved and collected different kinds for her. We had fun at the mall with Grandma Molly and had fun just being around the house, all together.

I’m going to try to get pictures updated this next week, so I’ll be sharing those to those of you who asked to be on the list. We got new cameras, so I need to see how those look compared to our old ones.

In other news, Signa is now in martial arts and has just been told she’s ready to test for her yellow belt. Very exciting. We were unsure of it at first, but have found it to be really good for Signa. Plus she loves it. She never stops smiling the whole time she’s there. I wonder how her face cannot just be aching from all that smiling.

I also missed telling you about our vacation with our friends from Ohio. I could retell it, but their 10-year-old daughter, M, wrote the story herself and gave me permission to share. She tells it better than I ever could have. And when I read it, I just want to have that vacation all over again. I cannot wait to see them again.

---

Chapter 1 Meeting Up

It was the morning that spring break started and I had to wake up at 2:30 AM. We were going to California. I had never been there before and was very excited to go. My alarm went off, I quickly got dressed, and prepared to leave. I pulled my hair back in a ponytail and brushed my teeth. My dad and I put the suit cases in the truck and we all got in to drive to the airport. When we got there, the line to get our bags checked was really long. We waited an hour and a half to get our bags checked! They had to hold the plane because everyone that was on the flight was in line. After they checked our bags we ran through the airport to catch our flight. We made it there with enough time to go to the bathroom before getting on the plane. We had planned to get cinnamon rolls at the airport for breakfast but since we didn’t have time, we had mini chocolate cookies, coke, and fruit stripe gum for breakfast on the plane. We flew to the airport in the Dallas, Texas and ate lunch there. When we finally arrived in California, I was so happy. We drove across a really long bridge called the Bay Bridge. We stayed in a beautiful hotel. We had a junior suite. It even had a kitchenette.
After checking into our hotel, we changed our clothes and went to our friends Marc, Debbie, Signa, and Will’s house. We ate dinner and played outside. When it was time to go back to the hotel, Will thought we were not coming back and started to cry!
The next morning Will was so excited to see me because he has a crush on me. We split up into two vehicles. Mommy, Debbie, little Will and I all rode in Debbie’s mini van. We went to the Harley Davidson store and then to Target to get some Starbucks. A [K’s 6-year-old sister] and I had vanilla bean frappuccinos. Signa had an icee from the Target concession stand area. Will, A, Signa and I shared a piece of coffee cake. Will also drank half of Debbie’s and half of A’s vanilla bean frappuccino. After our snack, we went to downtown Livermore and walked around and went into some of the shops. They had a farmer’s market and we bought cheese and fudge. For lunch, we went to a winery called Wente. We ate lunch beside the golf course there. The adults did a wine tasting after lunch.

Chapter 2 San Francisco

The second day we drove into San Francisco. We went to the Golden Gate Bridge and walked two miles of it and then turned around and walked back. My dad was so scared that he always held onto a railing. We saw sea lions swimming in the water below us. We could see all the way to Alcatraz and the buildings of San Francisco. After that we went to Muir Woods to see the redwood trees that are only found in California. The tallest redwood at Muir Woods is about 258 feet tall. The oldest trees are at least 1200 years old. The trees seemed to go up forever and were so big around that we could fit our whole family in one that was hollow at the bottom.
It was time for lunch so we drove to Chinatown to eat. We all ordered something different and then shared it. We went to the Golden Gate Fortune Cookie Factory to see them make fortune cookies. It was just a room with three old ladies folding up the cookies. We all got to eat a fortune cookie that was too cold to be folded. They were really good. After lunch we shopped in Chinatown. Will bought a little Totoro doll with a suction cup on a string attached to him. A got a jade Budda figure. We drove around and went up and down the hills. We went to Lombard Street which is San Francisco’s most crooked street. We walked down and back up. The street is made of bricks and we saw a boy trying to skateboard down the street. It was getting late and on our way out of town, we drove by the Painted Ladies which are pastel colored houses in a row. We drove back to our hotel and crashed.
In the morning, the Mascots came to the hotel and we followed them to the Bart Station. We rode the Bart into San Francisco. The Bart is the subway. We got some hot cocoa and then walked to Pier 39 to catch the boat to go to Alcatraz. Alcatraz, also known as The Rock, used to be a jail until it closed in 1963. It was used as a jail because it is a small island and it made it hard for people to try to escape. We took a tour of Alcatraz and saw the cells for the prisoners, the library, and the dining hall. We even saw the cells where some men escaped by digging through the cement blocks. They were never seen again. I got a book called Alcatraz the True End of the Line by Darwin E. Coon. Darwin was sentenced to four years on The Rock. He was a bank robber. He was in the gift shop and signed my book.
After the tour, we took the boat back to Pier 39 and we ate lunch, shopped and saw the sea lions. We also went to Fisherman’s Wharf and to Ghiradelli Square where we went to the Ghiradelli Chocolate Factory and saw them making chocolate from the cocoa beans. We got ice cream there. At the end of the day, we rode on a cable car. The conductor let A, Signa and I all pull on the brake together. The conductors also let us each ring the bell. After that, we rode the Bart back to Livermore and went to the hotel and to sleep.

Chapter 3 The Beach

On Wednesday morning, we went over to the Mascot’s house. The moms went grocery shopping for food to take to the beach house with us. The kids all played together outside. We played with live snails in a dollhouse. After lunch, we drove to the beach house on Hidden Beach in Aptos, California. The house was so big and beautiful. We went for a walk on the beach. Later that night, we had a little bonfire in the fire pit in the backyard and made smores. I ate four. After that we cleaned up and went to bed.
The next morning when I went downstairs, Will came running to me and gave me a big hug. He also said, “Good morning”. My dad made pancakes for us all for breakfast. After everyone ate, we went down to the beach. We took a two mile walk down the beach to see a ship that sank. They brought it back up and filled it with cement to create a pier to fish off of. We found seashells, sand dollars, rocks, sea glass, and small jelly fish on our walk. We jumped the waves, talked and took pictures. We all had sore feet after walking the two miles back to our area of the beach.
Our trip to California was to celebrate my mom and dad’s birthdays. For dinner that night, we went to the Beach Resort Restaurant for a delicious dinner. Both my parents got whole lobsters. The kid’s meals even came in a sand bucket with a shovel. After dinner, we went back to the beach house to play games and make more smores before going to bed.
Friday was our last full day in California. We went to Capitola where we ate lunch on the water and shopped. They had all kinds of art shops that I liked going through. We got some ice cream. After that, we drove to Santa Cruz and walked the boardwalk. We went in the arcade there and saw old arcade games like the laughing lady and the fortune teller. We went back to the beach house and made tacos for dinner.

Chapter 4 Going Home

On Saturday, we woke up early and went to the beach. It was windy and really cold. My feet felt like they were frozen. We were hoping to find lots of sand dollars before everyone got to the beach but the tide was still too high to find them. We found nothing but rocks and jelly fish. We dug in the sand for awhile with our shovels and buckets from the restaurant. We were all so cold that we went back to the beach house. We ate breakfast and finished packing up to go to the airport. Daddy took me back to the beach one more time to look for sand dollars and sea glass but we only found a few little pieces of sea glass. We went back to the beach house, changed our clothes, and said our goodbyes. Will was so upset that I was leaving that he wouldn’t speak to me. He just cried his heart out. Finally I got him to give me a hug and tell me bye bye. We all cried at the thought of leaving our friends. Mom, Dad, A and I went to the airport. Once we got through security, we got some lunch. We boarded the plane and flew to St. Louis, Missouri. We were going to get dinner in St. Louis but everything was closed. When we got to Dayton it was almost midnight so we drove home and went straight to bed. I will never forget my fun spring vacation trip to California.

Happy 3rd Birthday

2009-04-24T07:41:00.000-07:00

Dear Bubbanator/Bubba/Baby Man/Wilhelm/etc.,

It is so hard to believe you are THREE today. Three years old. Three years ago you were tucked safely inside and now you are running around getting injured daily. While you worry me incessantly with your bravery cum tantrumness, you also amaze me with your loving and thoughtfulness. You are energetic, quick to change emotions and so easily pleased. I remember being nervous about having a boy, but you’ve changed all that and now I wouldn’t have it any other way.

This past year has been so much fun with you. You speak so nicely and clearly and you are very comfortable expressing your feelings and your wants and needs. I love that you are polite (mostly) and even though you have to say, “Sorry,” just about every other word, I like that it upsets you that you got in that predicament yet again- shows that you really are sorry.

There are a few things that I do hope go away this year, though. The lying (“Daddy said I could”) and the “It was an accident” (even when it clearly wasn’t). Those things can go bye-bye any time. You now have a big boy bunk bed, so you will be in there soon and you also should start thinking about potty training sometime before I write next year’s letter. But other than those things, Bubba, please just stay my little man and give me lots of hugs and kisses always.

Love, Momma

Update

2009-03-04T07:24:00.000-08:00

Update to Charlotte: Signa now uses Indiana Jones' whip as a leash and leads Charlotte around the house with it...

William, with his arms held out to me, said, "Momma, may I please have some up?"

My Daughter

2009-03-01T21:06:00.000-08:00

Marc and Tori took Signa to the comic book convention in SF yesterday (Wondercon, I think it's called). There were literally thousands of items for Signa to choose from and she had $50 from birthday money to spend. What did she buy?

Out of all those items to choose from?

This.

It's name is Charlotte. Yes, it's sperm. And no, she doesn't know what it is except that it's tadpole/worm-like so she likes it.

And her other front tooth JUST came out. Much blood (Signa) and tears (me). Now everyone is too excited to go to sleep.

American Idol- Group 2

2009-02-25T22:53:00.000-08:00

Just finished watching Group 2 of American Idol. Yawn. B-O-R-I-N-G. I was hard-pressed to come up with three. All I had was one for sure vote. My man Norman. He’s really no American Idol, but he needs his own freaking show. A show where I don’t fast-forward through performances just to hear Simon’s critic.

So here was our list. Marc and I are bad with names, so we gave everyone names that we can remember.

Keep:
* Norman- seriously entertaining. I actually wanted to see more.
* Bat Chic- she looks like a bat. At first she was pig-nose girl, but then Marc said “bat” and it was more fitting. She has a cool voice.
* Tatoo Girl- sleeved tattoo. Pretty girl and pretty voice.

Ditch:
* Jonas Cousin- irritating beyond belief and looks like a Jonas Brother knock-off. You should not be allowed to sing, “I can’t get no satisfaction” with a stage smile on. It’s just wrong.
* Oscar Wilde (aka The Knack- his name is really Kai Kalama- say it aloud and you’ll know why we sometimes call him The Knack)- Wild hair and a good voice, but not that good.
* Welder Guy- bald guy who welds. Good for him. Hope he’s really good at welding.
* Red-haired 16-year-old- super cute, but boring.
* Cute MN Girl- super cute, but not that good.
And the four forgetables

Big Ball of Dough

2009-02-19T07:50:00.001-08:00

Signa has a check-up with the doctor today. It's about 6 months late and we never did get her shots last year. We just forget these things, as she's so healthy. Darn it. She's healthy and strong and even though she is the pickiest eater in the entire universe, she is growing just fine. Her face is so adorable with the missing front tooth. I love looking at her. Sometimes when I look at her beautiful face smiling at me, my brain acts like a movie screen and flashes her at me through the years. All the way from baby to little girl. And I know that I'm biased, but she seems to get more and more beautiful each year- inside and out.

I love how she isn't like other kids and is so much like Marc. She loves movies and isn't afraid of the things "normal" kids are afraid of. We all went to see Coraline, which is a movie that many adults would have been afraid of, in my opinion. But it was among my favorite movies and I nervously looked at Signa at the end and asked her what she thought. "IT WAS THE BEST 3D ANIMATIONS I'VE SEEN IN MY WHOLE LIFE!" She loved it. (as a side note, William enjoyed the popcorn and M&Ms. He then fell asleep and snored through the entire movie.)

And speaking of William...

He is learning to be polite. Or, I should say, we are constantly reminding him to be more polite. He ran up to me the other day, held out a tissue and demanded, "I HAVE A RUNNY NOSE." I looked at him and said, "How do you say that more nicely?"

"MAY I *PLEASE* HAVE A RUNNY NOSE?" Tissue still held out, demandingly.

Really, how do you not laugh and reinforce this?

Gramma spent the night last night and so she had to be subject to all his games. They played the Grandma game, the Winnie the Pooh game, and the card game. All while Marc and Signa went to get a pizza. They came back with a big ball of dough to play with (they give it to kids to shut them up). Signa gave Will a softball-sized ball and Will proceded to subject Gramma to a nice rousing game of Guess Which Hand It's In. So he'd hold out his tiny 2 1/2-year-old sized fists, one empty and one with an enormous piece of dough and make Gramma guess. And you can't tell him anything, so you have to keep guessing, even though the dough is bigger than his hand to his elbow.

But at the table just now at breakfast he said, "May I please have a napkin?" So all is well in the Mascot household.

For now.

Cartoon Sounds and Breastfeeding

2009-02-09T15:31:00.001-08:00

I’m pretty sure that I don’t breastfeed any more. William just sort of stopped asking a few weeks ago and I stopped offering. I did ask one night at bed time if he wanted beeboes and he said, “No, I just have yer arm.” So he rubbed my arm and went to sleep.

Last night, though, he asked again. I told him the beeboes didn’t have any milk in them any more. He said, “No mik? How ‘bout water?” I told him that beeboes don’t make water. “How ‘bout juice?” Nope, no juice either, I said.

“Ahhhh,” he said with woe. Then he killed me with the cartoon I've-been-let-down sound of: “WOMP WOMP WOMP WAHHHHH.”

Things you don't want to hear

2009-01-20T15:00:00.000-08:00

You don't want to hear the following words from your 2 1/2-year-old when he's alone in the living room:

"That's okay, Daddy! It was an akkident!"

All's well. There was just a spill or something. But the words conjured up many images of many "akkidents".

Brat

2009-01-19T19:45:00.001-08:00

I can't find it, but once upon a time, I wrote a letter to a snot-nosed freaky unmannered child. It went something like this:

Dear Snot-nosed Freaky Unmannered Child,
I realize that your parents never taught you to be nice or friendly, so it's not your fault, but honestly, it's not Signa's fault either and so I wish I could throw rocks at you. Or at least kick you. In your tiny freaky bitchy shins. Hard. But I am nearly 40 and you are 5, so I'm sure it'd be illegal. Instead I did nothing and then just will hate you forever for saying, "Do we even know you?" to my 3-year-old when she so nicely walked up and introduced herself to you.
Sincerely,
Signa's Momma

On Friday, we had another such incident. Some snot-nosed, freaky, unmannered child was so rude to Signa that Signa just sat there smiling not even knowing it was mean. "Why do you smile so much? It seems like you don't even know how not to smile" were said in a mean way, not a cheerful way and I just had to jump in. I told her that Signa smiles because she is happy and doesn't stop because she's still happy, even though she has to sit next to kids who don't play well with others and don't know how to smile on such a beautiful day.

Luckily, Marc already had known this kid was an issue an had already commented to her how we had met her at another park before but (quote) "Yeah, you were a lot cooler then." I'd said, "Marc!" under my breath admonishing him for it, but then she was mean to Signa and I just wanted to throw sand in her bitchy "socialized" face. But Marc had seen it coming. I'm proud that my kids introduce themselves, jump in and play, and share. I'm not sad that they smile "too much". Isn't smiling a good thing?

Bitchy little 6-year-old, you ruined my freaking park day with my kids. When you grow up to be president of something, I'm so coming after you. You owe me a day at the park.

Games We Play

2009-01-07T07:56:00.000-08:00

It's time to play Marc's favorite game! The Morning Game! Here's how you play... Take 2 children, ages 6 and 2 and decide what they are having for breakfast. Porridge, you say (Cream of Wheat, but they won't eat anything with the word, "wheat" so you always call it "porridge"--- like the bears). So here's the game.

Decide if you make one packet each or two. If you make two, they only eat one bite each and then are done and you waste a packet and a half each (so three packets). If you make one each, they will want more and have ants in their pants for the 1 minute and 30 seconds that it takes to quickly make the next packet and then they will decide that their Sitting Still quota has been all used up and don't want to eat.

I know what you are thinking- outsmart them and make three packets. Hold one in reserve and when they finish the first and start the tantrum- BAM! Split it between them. Yeah, good plan, but it doesn't work. They will either take the route of wasting all of it entirely OR they will not want to split it and the day will begin in tantrums. "MINE!" "NO, MINE!" "Will got more than I did." "Dister more Will!" Irritating.

The other fun game that sometimes, though, thankfully rarely comes after the Morning Game is the Bath Game. This doesn't need to be described entirely, but involves the following ingredients: William, a bathtub, lots of bleach and the crying words, "Oh no! I poop in the tub!!!" Not really in that order.

'Twas the Day Before Christmas...

2008-12-24T07:14:00.001-08:00

We had a wonderful Christmas party with the Mascot family over the weekend, where the kids learned to be spoiled rotten by Nana, Papa and Cousins and Aunties. Today we have the Spencer Christmas party at Gramma's house and then tomorrow... well, let's just say that even if Santa doesn't come, the kids still have it made.

One of the best gifts ever came last week and I'm so looking forward to sharing it tomorrow. Greg and Sheri sent CHICAGO PIZZA! It is a great gift because it's delicious, memorable, delicious, sentimental, and delicious. I'll also make the usual Mascot Christmas Chili, but the pizza is the best part of tomorrow (and Santa).

I hope everyone has a wonderful and safe Christmas!

Maggots, Vomit and Chickens

2008-12-13T19:48:00.000-08:00

Last night Tori came and babysat while we went to a Christmas party (where Marc was coerced into wearing an inflatable Santa suit while brandishing a bottle of wine- without even having consumed the wine). Anyway, while Tori was here, Signa made her Santa letter. She wanted it ready for today- Breakfast with Santa Day.

It had been my plan to use the power of suggestion when she asked Santa for gifts. Using my Jedi mind control, she was to say, “Dear Santa, I would love to have Legos for Christmas and not some stupid giant dinosaur.” However, since I was not close enough to use the mind control, here is her list:

Koda
Webkinz camel
Maggot

Love,
Signa

So Koda is a giant dinosaur that you ride on, much larger than the other giant dinosaur that I thought the kids wanted. Santa, if you bring Koda, I will send hate mail to you all year. Webkinz camel- go for it.

A FREAKING MAGGOT?!?! Seriously, my six-year-old daughter wants a maggot for Christmas. Oh, and not just any maggot, but a crawling toy maggot that was at Target TWO HALLOWEENS AGO. Santa, if you bring this (I can’t find it cheaper that 20 pounds in England with a shipping fee of 80 billion pounds), then I will send you love notes all year. And really not because it would make Signa happy but because then I would get to remind for the rest of her life that Santa came through and got her a maggot for Christmas when she was a child.

Here is the letter, in case you don't believe me. I made her add Legos.

William was cribbed to say, “Indiana Jones figures.” But last week, he changed it up and said he wants a candy cane. Look at your hands. Look at the left hand and say, “Candy cane.” Now look at your right hand and say, “Maggot.” Which one is super cute?

Yeah, it’s pretty even.

Anyway, breakfast with Santa was fine. Especially since Will waited to get home before vomiting profusely from both ends. Thank you, dear William, for not doing that on Santa in front of an auditorium of people. I will personally buy you TWO candy canes for that.

But I’m charging you three for the dry cleaning that my wardrobe from today is going to need.

In other cute stories, William is in love with Christmas cookies (sugar cookies with frosting) and the cutest part of it is how he says it. “Kitmas cookies.” Kitmas is just my favorite.

Today Signa was watching something about this family that hatched baby chicks from eggs. She came running in to where I was getting changed from Vomit Attire and said, “So they put the eggs in an imbitator. What’s an imbitator?” I explained the idea of an incubator keeping them warm and getting the eggs ready to hatch. “Well, that’s dumb. Why didn’t they just bring home a chicken to sit on the eggs?”

Yeah. Why?

Two Ohs

2008-12-06T19:36:00.001-08:00

William has been particularly humorous lately. The other night when we were in bed, he was tossing and turning and talking and messing around. I was getting increasingly irritated with him and then he said, “Momma, you very, very pritty.” I said, “Ahhhh,” told him that was nice of him and he said, “And Willyum Macot cool!”

He is very into seeing two “O”s next to each other. “Yook! Two ‘O’s!” everywhere we go.

I Like It

2008-11-30T13:13:00.000-08:00

Nothing yet everything has been going on. Nothing much to write about, but enough so that we are too busy to write. Will is getting cuter and cuter by the day, but also more and more stubborn and “independent.” He wants to do everything by himself (“No, help! I do it myself!”) and he wants to do everything his sister does (“No, Wull do it, too!”). Oh, and just about every sentence starts with, “No.”

He has taken to enjoying any and all small injuries and frequently tells us, “I have to go to the doctor.” He hasn’t completely mastered telling us what he wants, but he does tell us what he likes. “I like it beebos.” “I like it milk.” Always the “it” between. He introduces himself to everyone with a handshake and “Name William Mascot” while pointing at himself. He also runs around making sure everyone is happy and knows what time of day it is. “Momma, I happy. You happy? Good aternoon, Momma.” (or “Good morning, Momma” or “Good night, Momma”).

Signa is just getting smarter and smarter by the moment and loves to use her imagination. She has an art class, a science group, a gymnastics class and a few playgroups each week. Last week, she had a three-hour long, three-day “Pre-engineering” class at the community center. “Pre-engineering” is actually Legos, which they used to build many cool things and, more importantly, had fun with in a big group. Signa’s teacher shared with us that she is a fun child and asks a lot of questions. But she asks them before he is done explaining. He said she is also very helpful. She helps all the other students, even when they don’t ask for help. As he said, as problems go, these are very good ones to have.

Thinking back to her dance recital at age 3, some things just haven’t changed at all.

Today we were playing store and Signa was the shopkeeper. I was shopping at her store and mentioned that I really should get the toy elephant for my son, as he really likes elephants. As I added it to my basket, she said, “Your kid probably also likes this dinosaur.”

“No,” I said. “The elephant is enough.”

She whispered at me, “No, for your GIRL kid.”

---

Edited to add the following Will-ism from today at Gramma's house:

"William, I told you to leave the lights alone! Go to your trouble sofa!"

He sat at the trouble sofa (equivalent of a Pooh Sofa that we have at home) and then I said, "Okay, you can get down. Go say you are sorry."

Will walked by me and went straight to the light switch. "Torry, yite." When I didn't say he could go play (because I was trying to laugh silently), he said, "Torry, yite switch. No more play."

Too funny.

Here I Go Again

2008-11-06T08:00:00.000-08:00

I'm so sorry for this. But I'm going to get political again. I can't help it. This is just too much for me to bear without writing about it. Again, move along if we've agreed not to discuss politics or politic-like by-products. It's just that I have hot-buttons and one has been pressed. The one right next to Sarah Palin.

I've been married for 20 years (and three months). That's a long time (especially in California). So my real question is this: what the heck does someone else's marriage have to do with mine? I'm offended that people imply so. I see people every day who are married and happy, married and miserable, unmarried and happy, and unmarried and miserable. How do any of those have anything at all to do with my own marriage? I do not feel undermined by anyone else's marriage- even if I think their marriage is a bad idea.

And then to say that someone's marriage actually affects my family, not even just my own marriage? How? My children like toads and snails and Daleks from Doctor Who. They do not (I repeat, do NOT) care who, or if, you marry (unless you happen to have a wedding where there is dancing UNTIL NINE THIRTY! in which case, they plead that you marry and invite them to the wedding- see notes about Unkee's wedding if this has confused you). They love to see people happy (see my last diatribe about Will's favorite conversation), if you are a man and want to marry a man, they are all for it (especially if you have dancing UNTIL NINE THIRTY!). And we applaud that because, really, why should we be allowed the easy, "We've been married for 20 years," and they will have to use up all the oxygen in the universe to say, "We've been domestic partners in a legal union for 20 years." Seriously, California? You are going to make them say THAT stupid ass thing? What is the big deal here?

So you don't like gay people- then don't be one. So you don't like gay marriage- then don't have one. Period. But why is it so hard for you to let other people do what you don't even want to do? How does their happiness take away yours? It's a rhetorical question, I know. There is no way I can convince you to change your mind and no way (in hell) you can change mine, so I guess I just leave this here as a way to voice that I personally completely and totally disagree with the passage of Prop. 8 and will be calling today to see what I can do to help overturn it in court.

But at least the eggs I eat will be eggs layed by married chickens. Oh. Wait. I guess I read Prop. 2 wrong. Chickens can't marry, either. They can now just lie down, turn around and stand up in their domestic partnerships.

You're My Friend!

2008-11-03T20:05:00.000-08:00

We've been busy for Halloween! Signa and Marc went to a Halloween party and to escape the wails of, "No! Will Halloween party, too!" we had our own Halloween party. We made mummy pizzas (English muffins with string cheese draped over it to melt like mummy wrappings and olives for eyes), pumpkin cupcakes and spooky popcorn (okay, just popcorn, but I told him they looked like ghost poop). We did crafts, like the hanging Happy Halloween spider that only came with six legs and I knew Signa would have a hissy fit and talk about it for her whole lifetime like the time I made her wear shoes without socks because the outfit was cuter that way and she got blisters and every time we pass the park near Gramma's where it happened she brings it up even though that was three years ago, so I made two extra legs for the damned freaking spider craft.

For Halloween, Will was Darth Vader and Signa was a Dalek from Doctor Who. We went to our downtown Halloween parade on Wednesday and it was a lot of fun. Few people knew who Signa was, but it was a great costume even if you didn't know. And the cool part was that if they knew what she was, they thought it was amazing and really even more cool than cool. On Halloween itself, trick-or-treating, no one knew who she was, but again, it didn't matter because everyone thought it was still amazing.

For the cute/funny stories, Marc is taking a sculpting class and needed a rubber band to wrap around his tool case. He courtesy-asked Signa if he could take one from her jar as he took one from her jar (she's saving up to make a rubber band ball ala PeeWee Herman). Seriously, within 1.2 minutes of returning home from class, Signa had taken that rubber band from around the box and returned it to her jar. Without saying a word. It was just gone when he turned back around and she was calmly returned to the sofa.

We went to a play date at the park and one of the little boys brought his tricycle. To show how bad we are at taking the kids out for bike rides, William sat on it and then said, "Needs batteries."

Speaking of Will, when he gets in trouble lately (which is kind of a lot), he cries a so very sad cry and looks at you with the saddest face you have ever seen in your whole life and says, "But Momma, I'm your friend!" If he weren't so very bad (think, hitting, fighting and general wreaking amazing havoc without any fear of any repercussions), it might actually get to me. Instead I laugh evilly and say, "Not right now you aren't buster!" (Okay, I don't, but sometimes I want to).

All About William

2008-10-22T09:10:00.000-07:00

William is obsessed with Happy these days. Here is a typical conversation:

“Will’s Happy, Momma. Momma happy?”
“Yep. Momma’s happy.”
“Daddy happy?”
“Yep. Looks pretty happy to me.”
“Dister happy?”“Sister’s happy, too, BuhBuh.”

It’s actually really cute how he does it.

This will only be funny to those of you who like Mystery Science 3k. There is an episode where they spoof the Amazing Colossal Man. Joel acts like he’s the amazing colossal man, Glen, and says, “Oh, I’m huge! What kind of a sin does a man have to commit to get to be so huge?!?!” And he throws the backs of his hands down on the table for emphasis. This morning when I came out of the tub, Will was playing in the kitchen with a bee from the Bee Movie. I heard, “Oh, huge! Sin and huge!!!” in the same voice as Joel doing his Glen impersonation.

It also cracks me up how he introduces himself to everyone. He walks up, taps himself on the chest and says, “Name William. Daddy name Marc. Momma name Debbie. Dister name Digna.” And he’ll shake their hand and say, “Hello, (whatever they said their name was).”

He is such a little man.

Creature from the Black Lagoon

2008-10-18T08:57:00.000-07:00

First conversation with Signa this morning-

Me: "Wow! You are so smiley this morning! That's what I like to see!"
Signa: "That's because I had a good dream."
Me: "Tell me! What was it about? Candy? Webkinz?"
Signa: "No, I had a dream that the Creature from the Black Lagoon came to our house and I got to feed him."

Only in our house would this be a GOOD dream...

Bumper Stickers

2008-10-17T18:50:00.000-07:00

I feel that I’m pretty opinionated- I’ve got an opinion on just about everything; I just don’t share it with everyone all the time. Which is why bumper stickers are beyond me. Is it to have people treat you differently (Oh, he’s got an Obama bumper sticker, so I won’t swear at him after he cuts me off)? Or is it to change people’s minds (Oh, that guy has a cool car and drives nicely- huh! A McCain bumpersticker?!?!? I was going to vote democrat this time, but now I’ve changed my mind!)? Some seem like they are good warnings. NRA for instance. Keep far away. Far far away, as they can and WILL kill you. Same with the God-fish sticker people.

To me, it’s almost like the death penalty- what is the purpose? If you give me a good purpose that makes sense and is backed up by facts, I’ll gladly glue those puppies all over my car and delight in the news when San Quentin kills off another convict But really, it just doesn’t make sense.

On a totally different note, while watching the debates, Signa said, "Daddy, how come that white guy sounds like he's just making up stuff?"

Happy 6th Birthday, Mrs. Magilicutty!

2008-09-26T20:50:00.000-07:00

Dear Mrs. Magilicutty,

You have now turned six. My six-year-old little girl. It’s amazing that you could be six already when it seems like just yesterday that you were saying, Tickabah and scotching around on your butt as your only mode of movement. This was a very special birthday for you (or maybe me), as this is the year that you can truly understand how much we adore you and appreciate you and love you. So we decided to reward you for not only your birthday, but also the amazingness that is you with a surprise trip to Disneyland.

You woke up on your birthday with such joy at just being you and having a birthday and being in a hotel. Yet you still had no clue that you were at Disneyland, since we arrived so late at night and you were asleep. So we let you revel in birthdayness and then you opened your gifts to find Disneyland tickets. And then you found out that you were going RIGHT NOW and the happiness and joy on you face and in your eyes was worth all the money in the world (which is pretty much what it cost to go to Disneyland for three days).

Anyway, Signa, you are the best daughter, child, friend, and person that I can imagine. I’m proud of you each and every day and cannot believe how lucky I am to have been given a chance to not only know you, but to be in your family. You are so sweet and kind and loving and such a wonderful sister and helper. I love how smart you are and how innocent, too.

You know that the best present I ever got was you on your birthday.

Love,
Momma

Creature Features

2008-09-17T06:31:00.001-07:00

Does anyone remember Creature Features? It was a show on late at night on the weekend that played two monster/scary movies and you were allowed to stay up to watch Creature Features each week as late as you wanted. If you were like me, you “just rested your eyes” at the first commercial and then proceeded to sleep through the whole rest of the movie(s).

Marc was telling Signa about Creature Features a couple of weeks ago and she got very excited and wanted to watch it. Since it isn’t on anymore and DVDs are now invented, they planned a Creature Features Night for the coming Saturday night. All week long, they planned Creature Features Night- what movies they would watch (Frankenstein and Them), what snacks they would have (popcorn and hot chocolate), and Signa even drew at least 46 maps of the house and where they would sit in relation to where the television is in the living room.

Saturday night finally came and Will and I bid them good night at 8:30. We kissed them and hugged them and wished them a ton of fun for Creature Features Night.

At 9:10, Marc carried the sound-asleep Signa to bed.

Last Saturday was the second try for Creature Features Night. This time she made it to 9:40pm.

Guess who takes after Momma?