AVIANA

1/04/2010

2009-07-05T23:01:00.004-04:00

1/04/2010

2009-05-20T09:53:00.002-04:00

i'm sorry all...again...but i'm in the process of trying to find work..it has gotten almost to desperation point....i don't have much money left so all of my time is focusing on looking for work...

my singing has gone completely to the side as i need to pay the bills....it sucks as i've improved so drastically and got a one in a million chance to study with a phenomenal flamenco singer in Madrid....it has been literally 3 months since i last sung a note...

it hurts...it really hurts....

i understand if many of you no longer read this blog since i have had not updated but i have to do what i have to do.......

wish me luck....i hope all of you are well......i hope to return..

AVIANA

Tavalodet Mobarak....

2009-05-03T13:12:00.003-04:00

Tavalodet Mobarak....janam...my life....my heart....tavalodet mobarak....joon...siempre...siempre...

P.S. Katie Melua with "Just Like a Dream"

You're Here.....

2009-04-17T17:49:00.011-04:00

Oh my God......

I did it...I wrote it....I actually wrote it...I finally did it.....

for almost 4 years this 4 measure chorus melody line has been in my fingers, inside me....tugging at my soul....begging me to give it an ending....to give it a beginning.....to give it life....making me sure i would never forget it even though i lost hope that i would never have the honor and the ability to give it life...to nurture it.....to help it grow.......to be...

but it had a soul...a soul calling out to me...begging me....and i think my soul...my inspiration finally answered....my soul finally returned the unrequited love to the melody..the unrequited love the song had for my lost of hope........the unrequited love the song had for me......

i wrote it...i wrote it....the song....i can't believe it....4 years!....it finally came out...i'm fighting back tears...odd that it came at the end of another bad day of looking and not finding work...odd it came on a day when another passion of mine did not get its just due....but this...you....my song....i wrote you.....just like i wrote "Before You Break My Heart..."....just like I wrote "Rise..."....i can't believe it......i finally wrote you....after all these years.....

wow....thank you for choosing me to serve as your vessel as you begged me all these years to give you life when all i had was a shadow of a skeleton.....all i had was doubt...

you are here....wow....i wrote you.....my song...............my song......

Susan Boyle

2009-04-16T10:12:00.005-04:00

I'm sorry guys for not being active on my blog...I'm looking for a job and that is taking my time....My music and singing training and belly dance training have suffered drastically also...only thing is flamenco because I luckily get those classes for free and luckily from a phenomenal teacher...

However, I had to write a little note about... Susan Boyle... I'm upset, irrate, annoyed, bothered, saddened at people's reactions to Susan Boyle's magnificent singing voice. People are astonished, and some have gotten tears in their eyes because how amazed they are by her beautiful singing voice. People are celebrating her voice like she's the next coming of something holy.

Why is that? Is it because she doesn't look like, Shakira, Beyonce, Leona Lewis, Britney Spears, Halle Berry?...What does that say? If someone came on any stage and had some comparable beauty to the aforementioned or some other beauty queen, people wouldn't for the most part initially doubt on their singing abilities. They start on a blank slate. However, a 47 year woman who is not a size 2 with long flowing hair, who doesn't fit the typical model or barbie look is automatically looked upon as not as talented even before she has opened her mouth.

People started to laugh at Susan Boyle before she even opened her mouth! Sickening.

I don't have the most amazing singing voice. that's a fact. I don't look like the aforementioned celebrities. that's a fact. But i've come to realize that maybe we need to go back to the days where there wasn't music videos. When it was all based on the voice. Maybe then people wouldn't be as surprised that someone who doesn't look like Cindy Crawford can sing.

This is some of the reason why we have these sickening views on beauty, in particular of women. They have to feel like they have to look like something to be given a chance. I think Christina Aguilera stated some time ago that there were singers/backup singers a whole lot better and more talented than her. However, because they dont' look a certain way, they won't ever be given a chance.

Does Susan Boyle fit in that category?....Luckily her voice on national tv somehow gave her a chance and people's misconceptions on her talent and her looks...

If you are one of those people who laughed at her or simply somewhat doubted her...due to your views on beauty and now you are celebrating her talent....you should be ashamed of yourself...

P.S. here's the video since it can't be embedded...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY&feature=related

New Chapter...

2009-03-20T17:03:00.007-04:00

Hello all

I hope you guys are all well! For those of you who are of Persian descent or Baha'i, Happy Naw Ruz!

For those who don't know, today is the first day of the Persian New Year and tomorrow is the first day of the Baha'i New Year. I believe that is correct, I'm not either but I believe that is correct. I have plenty of friends of mine who are celebrating this so there are lots of celebrations over the weekend starting tonite!

I'm sorry I have not been regular with my blog postings. I've been trying to create music, editing photos from Madrid, teaching myself alot on photoshop because I think photography is going to play a major role in the next chapter of my life. So I'm training myself as much as I can. I think I might go out into the photography world and start doing some professional gigs. I've been told my many that I have the talent and I should have been charging all along but I did not have confidence in my skills. But when my mom, who has not been supportive of my artistic endeavors to mention photography as a possible thing for me to do, I guess that must mean something right!...hehe...

Anyhow, I think I'm going to start with portraits and small events. But I will continue to do my artistic photography and my music. I've been worrying about money alot lately because I have not been working and I'm getting worried. I'm hoping this gig with the agency comes through or else I dont' know what's going to happen... :( Wish me luck guys...

One positive news is that I decided to launch an Art/Music Blog. A blog that will basically be me promoting different artists in whatever fields I like, in particular music and me discussing my passions. I noticed a few times whenever I put some artists on this blog right here...like on the youtube video on the right hand side of the screen....some of you have asked me here and there, who is the artist, how much you like the music, thanks for opening you up to something different....

Additionally, whenenever I play my Ipod or something at gatherings, people are always amazed at the amount and the varying kinds of music and people always want to know how I discovered the music, they tell me how much they love it and ask me what to recommend.

And also when I listen to certain artists I'm always like, "wow, why don't more people know about these artists?...even though they are not "pop-mainstream"...people should know more about them and maybe people can learn more about a different culture that way. Because I firmly believe music unites everyone. We don't all speak the same language but our souls understand the musical notes."

Well I just recently started to think about doing a blog on that! However, it will not just focus on music, but dancing of course since I dance, photography, theater and other forms of art that I feel inspired by. I don't know where that will go but we'll see...

I'm about to buy the domain name so I can't tell you what it's going to be called yet until it's for sure! :) I don't think I will put it on Blogspot. Nothing wrong but I think I want it to develop a little bit more into what, I don't know! We'll see...

Anyhow, I hope all is well with you guys. I can't stay. I gotta go get ready for a Naw-Ruz celebration. Gonna be with some friends tonite and then go to a photography open house tonite. check it out, see the set up and possibly renting out studio space and maybe take a class here and there if possible once I get a job. Hopefully, the agency pulls through this week or next week! Cross your fingers and say a little prayer for me!

By the way this video/song is something I just found a couple of weeks ago. Actually I bought a compilation CD of a number of Indian artists and this is one of my favorite songs. I can't get enough of it. I never saw the movie that came along with it. I think there was a movie. I'm assuming so because of this youtube video. Anyhow it brings me pure joy and my soul just can't stop soaring when I listen to this music piece. It's by A.R. Rahman & Chinmayee. I just found out A.R. Rahman won 2 Oscars for Slumdog Millionaire. I did not watch the movie...because my pockets are tight and I'm more of a Netflix girl anyhow. I knew that movie was a big movie. I will watch it on Netflix.

Of course I believe my Indian readers will appreciate my love for this piece. :)

Oh if any of my Indian readers can translate a little bit and tell me what this song is about, I would greatly appreciate it. :)

Alrite, have good one and I'll speak to you soon!

AVIANA

P.S. A.R. Rahman & Chinmayee with Tere Bina

P.S.S. I love the picture on the top!. I found it online...I wanted a blue picture for today especially because when I hear this song, I think of the color blue... Oh it's not mine. Unless noted, the pictures on the blog are not mine. Bye!

I'm Back...

2009-03-05T23:38:00.004-05:00

Hello All,

I hope all is well. I am back from Madrid.

It was an interesting trip. I am so excited that my family has extended. I met some amazing individuals and my soul won't be at ease again until I see them again. Such wonderful souls....I'm deeply humbled... I only hope I am trully deserving of meeting them. Wow....I will do whatever I can to see you soon. My soul is aching to see you all...wow..such spiritual connections... I will see you again.... My hope and determination is this September!

My life back here. I'm going through some artistic motions mostly thanks to my soul connections in Madrid. Not sure what I will do next. I am more eager to grow and practice on a daily basis now. Will I teach again?.....I'm not sure....I'm more inclined to say "NO" at this point. Due to my belief that I need to train better on my own before I teach anymore. I'm waiting for my teacher Marta to return from her trip to train again. I need to appropriately study for the Suhaila Salimpour Level 2 certification. I am due to test in October but I may have to push that back for another year. Not happy with that...unless I do major overtime with training between now and the Fall.

Photography is taking a bigger and bigger role in my life. Not sure what. But I'll see where this road takes me.....

Anyhow, my creative juices have been renewed. I just need my pockets to be filled with some money to keep me going. :) I can't stay and write for too long. I must go back to some non-paying artistic work right now. hah!....

I'll upload a couple of pics soon of my trip so that you know that I did actually go to Madrid!

Anyhow must go....Oh this video is of one of my favorite singers out there...Concha Buika. She is from Spain. She is a beyond phenomenal singer!

I will write soon. Hope all is well... :)

AVIANA

P.S. Concha Buika with Mienteme Bien

Hola from Madrid!

2009-02-01T22:10:00.000-05:00

Hello all!

Yes I'm in Madrid!...I've been here for 1 week already and it's been exhausting! I've been taking only 2 flamenco classes a day for a total of 2.5 hours of intense dancing per day. Next week I'm gearing up to 3 dance classes a day for between 3.5 to 4.5 hours of dancing a day. I'm physically exhausted but it's worth it.

Well I finally took my first voice lesson in Madrid from a reknown flamenco singer. I took the class last tuesday night. It was a group class and my friend "M" had to come along so she can translate for me. There were about 8 other singers in there and they were good. I was nervous. But when it came to my turn, they all kept raving about my voice! I was happy about that...until...thursday. I had my first private class with the same teacher. My voice didn't do anything like the night before so I was bummed. Oh well..

It's weird how the other students and the teacher were blown by my voice and when i heard my recording the next day I wanted to destroy it. I sound awful to my ears!

Oh in one of my flamenco classes I'm dancing along one of my favorite flamenco dancers in teh world. Prado! Wow....I've watched her performance in the dvd and youtube over and over again! And now I'm in class with her! Well actually she's the teacher's assistant but still! She's so tiny in person. She must be like 5 feet tall. I know i'm small too at 5"3 but she's so tiny! She can't be taller than 5 feet!

Last Sunday night we saw one of my friend's friends dance at a tablao! My first Spain tablao! A tablao is basically a bar/lounge spot where there is a flamenco performance. They are extremely hard to do because the crowd is so close to you and it's just you!

I went to the famous tablao called "Casa Patas" this past Saturday night and was blown away by the dancers there! wow they beyond phenomenal!

I'm sorry my updates have been scarce since being here in Madrid. My connection is limited and it is very weak. So I can't update any pictures either until I get back into the states.

So my post is not that exciting...

anyhow, i just caught a cold and i'm trying to get over it so i've been locked up all day today in my apt just trying to get better for this week's upcoming classes especially my private voice lesson tomorrow.

I'm gonna go and drink my soup and tea and try to finish memorizing these songs for vocal class tomorrow.

I'll talk to you soon. Oh here's a repeat video with Prado in it. She's awesome! I can't believe i'm in class with her!

Oh it snowed in Madrid today!

bye!

AVIANA

Can you believe it?!...MADRID!

2009-01-16T12:45:00.000-05:00

Hello All,

How are you? Great I hope. It's been an interesting new year so far. I wish you all a happy new year!

I know you're wondering what is the big news I announced in my last post.

Well, in 8 days....I'll be in ....MADRID!!!!!

Yes the day has finally arrived after 3 years!..Yes I will be in Madrid in 8 days!

I'm soooo excited! Can't you tell?!

It's been more of a last minute decision to go to Madrid now. My friend "M" is coming with me. If she wasn't going, I know for sure I would not be going on this trip now. I'm not going for as long as I intially planned but I'm going anyhow.

Can you believe it?!! I'm going to SPAIN!.

I'm subletting a 1 bedroom apt through a mutual friend. I will be dancing it up at the flamenco dance studio. I'll be taking spanish language classes in the morning and dancing it up in the afternoon.

My friend who's bilingual in spanish/english is coming along so it will be great so I won't be completely lost. My other friend has hooked me up with her son over there who's a musician. So I won't be alone...yay!

For all of you who have followed me the past couple years on this blog, know that this trip was a long time coming. I hope you guys can celebrate this with me. You'll all be there with me as I live life in Madrid.

Wow...the day has come....I almost thought this wasn't going to happen. But it's here.

I can't talk for long but I will definitely put an update next week. before I go on that plane to Madrid.

Can you believe it?!! I'll be in Madrid...next Saturday!

AVIANA

P.S. This is a repeat vids but thought it would be fun to help celebrate. Gipsy Kings with Bamboleo.

2009-01-06T01:25:00.001-05:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I'm sorry all... :( I've been M.I.A. I'm back. I will come back later on this week or so to update you on a couple of exciting details....well really 1 BIG exciting detail!. You'll be smiling...I'm sure of it!

I'll write back soon!

AVIANA

2008-11-24T00:28:00.003-05:00

Hello All!

Yes I've been MIA. I'm back at work and things are crazy and crazier. I just finished this huge fundraiser that was in the works since June. It was awesome! Now I've officially signed on to Executive Produce a flamenco theater production! Yay! Scary too!

I'm excited and will tell you guys more about this production.

I'm also currently teaching a Belly dance technique workshop too..

In the meantime here is a picture of me that I took Sunday morning. Yay...I took the pic. hehe..

Also here is my current passion, Nancy Ajram from Lebanon. As you can probably tell, I'm dancing to this song non-stop....doing my shimmies, pelvic locks, chest squares, undulations, figure 8s and all! Yep belly dance terminology from the incomparable Suhaila Salimpour...my teacher. Anyhow, enjoy this song... Oh by the way, Tuesday is my birthday!

Have a good one! Bye!

AVIANA

P.S. Nancy Ajram with "Saharni Sahar"

...the moment has arrived...OBAMA...

2008-11-04T23:56:00.002-05:00

...the moment has arrived.....OBAMA...

2008-10-14T07:47:00.001-04:00

Hi All!

I'm out of work... :( Hoping my next project comes soon. Please cross your fingers and pray... Seriously.. I need all the positive energy right now... :)

Until I put up a proper post which will be in the next couple of days, please check out this video by Beyonce!

This video is on FIRE!

AVIANA

P.S. Beyonce with "Single Ladies...Put a ring on it...)

Random Thought....too much internet exposure?

2008-09-29T22:09:00.007-04:00

Hi All,

I know, I know, I know...I've been M.I.A. I've been busy..that is my main excuse. As you read in my previous post..like you should have!!....i have alot of things going on but it doesn't excuse to a certain a degree me keeping up with you guys....

If you are still reading my blog and tracking my life, thank you and I greatly appreciate it...I don't mean to take these breaks but sometimes you need that you know?...

Anyhow, how are you guys? I hope well..

Well, I was out of work for 3 solid weeks, which is not unusual in my line of work...I'm a contractor..but it is not desired so I always hustle for the next gig...anyhow...i go back to work tomorrow, Tuesday..Yay! Ig get a paycheck next week! Sucks, that I won't have the free time to focus on everything else, mainly my music. :(

Yes, that is a picture of my belly on top...I was in the middle of my bellydance class so I took a picture

Sometimes, I wonder when this facebook, myspace, twitter, blog phase is going to end? I'm not hoping it will but all things do come to an end. We've become a society where our lives are open for the world. I'm on facebook...and I'm on it non-stop. I have a site for my personal stuff and a fan page for my artistic side which I have not advertised.

I've gotten to the point that I've contemplated on several times on whether I want to have my life out on the internet for the world to see. My personal life is not really out there but just the little bit is too much for me I think.

Really....why does everyone want to know what's going on in peoples' lives? Why do we want our lives out there?

My facebook page...I know there are people who just go on my site and look at my pics and see what's going on on my wall etc..but never call me or leave a note to say hi but yet they are listed as a "friend." Does that make any sense?

Well facebook and those other sites do have benefits...for artists, actually keeping up with people you don't get to see often, or even finding long lost relatives... One of my friend's never met her mother. Gues what?...She found her on facebook!

Can you believe that? wow!

anyhow, this was just a random thought that's been going on in my head..

Oh here's NKOTB or New Kids On The Block. This an oldie..one of their first songs. I was in love with Joey McIntyre. Actually, at one point I had a crush on each of them separately, but Joey was the one I always went back to. Gotta love that baby face and those pretty blue eyes! Hah!!

They all grew up to be handsome men. All of them are still hot! Anyhow, I'm playing an oldie and maybe later on this week I'll play one of their new ones. Enjoy

hope all is well... I will try to visit all of your blogs... :) have a nice one!

AVIANA

P.S. New Kids On The Block with "Please Don't Go Girl"

HOT!/Quick Update..

2008-09-16T13:11:00.002-04:00

HI ALL,

I haven't done this in awhile but..I just saw this picture on www.concreteloop.com. How HOT is this man?!!!

Sigh...

Anyhow, quick update, I sold 2 pieces from my first photography exhibit. Yay! Exciting especially for me!

I found my new choreographer for the second half of the competition piece. Yay! He specializes in African dance movement and does some fusion of African dance with other styles. Perfect!

Figured out my costume for the competition but now I gotta find the money to actually design it!

Nope, I'm still not working. I submitted myself for a new assignment for next week. Hopefully I'll get it. Cross your fingers!

Working out the finances for Madrid. I'm about to make that deposit for the trip...My passport expired...so gotta get a new one quick!

May actually start teaching basic bellydance technique on a regular basis starting in a couple of weeks. yay!

Still working with this NGO in Tanzania. We're working on a fundraiser November 8. I gotta produce the show (getting all the performers etc.). We're looking for sponsors, people to donate stuff for the silent auction, etc.

Studying in a new palo in flamenco (another style/rhythm of flamenco) called Bulerias. Wow it's hard!

Suhaila Salimpour is coming! Gotta get ready for the intense workshop.

Ok gotta go. I'll talk to you soon!

AVIANA

P.S. Lenny Kravitz with "I belong to you"

Monday Thoughts....

2008-09-07T22:51:00.014-04:00

Hello All,

That is where I want to be right now....sigh..

That's Cartagena, Colombia, where I'll be next June....sigh....

How have you guys been?

Well, I've been beyond busy but now I'm a little less busy as I am not working... :( Nope, not good. So I hope another project comes through at least by Monday of next week. Cross your fingers too....

Well, as you read in the previous post, I had a gig and it went well. Yay! If you read the last post, you will notice that I got a special compliment from a woman. I won't tell you, you gotta go back and read the previous post to see which one I'm talking about!!! Hah!

For those of you who read the previous post, you will remember that compliment. I decided based on that compliment that I will no longer perform....for the time being.

I decided this because if I inspired that woman so much and other individuals too, then they deserve that much more. I need to perfect my craft. That is kind of an oxymoron because in some ways, in my belief, you can't ever perfect your craft. But at least for me, I need to study more. I have to be respectful to the art, the craft, the spirit....I know that sounds kinda weird and new agey....but it's the truth.

I'm only at a beginner level and I am able to inspire people with just the little bit that I can do. I am not demeaning anyone's opinion on me as a performer but you deserve that much more. I hope I can give you that....

I still have my competition in December and I am still looking for another choreographer for the second half of my piece. Wish me luck, there's not much time! Ah!!!

Costuming ideas are all in my head as I need to get started on it now!

I have exactly 4 months and 3 weeks before I leave for Madrid. It's coming... :)

Oh by the way, I participated in my first photography exhibit over the weekend. I displayed 2 series of photography. The first were candids from a flamenco juerga (party) and the other is titled joy. Here is a pic of one of my pieces. Pretty exciting that I did this! I was so proud of myself and still am. Just another way of expressing my spirit in its' creative self....

Yep those are my pieces all along that wall...I'm proud of myself.. :)

I'm gonna try to meet with a new teacher/accompanist this week. His name is Mick and he is a genius on piano, keyboard, organ..etc... Chris referred me to him so we'll see how it goes...

The advantage of not working this week (hopefully only this week) is that I can focus on a number of other things...a 1 day performing arts festival the first weekend of October that I'm producing along with my friend Rhina. I can also work on a newsletter for a nonprofit I'm working with, I will also work-out!!!!! (thank you!!!) I will return to my dance and voice lessons. And most of all.....I've been waiting on this....I will have time to work on my music.....my spirit will breathe again....

Oh here's my current passion...Mayra Andrade. She's from Cape Verde. Her music just help bring me back to my roots. I'm not Cape Verdian but her sound, her voice, her music, rhythm...all of it is helping guide my musical soul to a new stopping point of my musical journey. Amazing talent she is. Please check her out.

Oh...isn't she just gorgeous...

Anyhow, won't stay for too long....hope things are well and i will try to return with an update by Friday....

Bye!!

AVIANA

P.S. Mayra Andrade with "Lua (moon)"

AVIANA-Show Diary...

2008-08-25T19:34:00.030-04:00

EXTRA LONG POST!!!

...Great..we're here early. Hmm...I hope someone is here or the door's open so me and Michael can sneak in and begin to rehearse. Wow, it's hot and it's so early in the morning.... Damn..all the doors are locked. Ooh..this door's open, but it doesn't let me in the main hall. Well I just sneak in and do some quick vocal exercises while Michael's at the car waiting. My voice is loud, loving the acoustics in here. Don't strain your voice. Sing as big as you want cuz no one can hear you.

Why can't I relax and feel it in my gut...

Alrite, Michael's probably wondering where I am....ooh..someone's here...Yay!!

We can go in. Hmm...place looks the same. NOO...they have the chairs and the ministage on top of the main stage. They have to move it, I can't dance on carpet!. Alright gotta make sure Michael's okay... Great, they'll help me move the chairs and the mini-stage.

I'm my own crew!!! haha..

Alrite let me warm up as they mop the stage.....Gotta get the foot work...I've been fumbling...I'm already tired..NOT GOOD....I hope Michael's not nervous...He's practicing in the chairs now.. We've been working on this for awhile now. I do wish we had more rehearsal time. I hate rehearsing but it is needed... Ok let me sit and sing quietly with Michael. My voice feels okay but I'm worried about the big note.

Good I can rehearse on stage. It's small but I don't need too much room, it's just enough space. Ok here's the music. Walk through it but go full out once to at least get it in your system before the show. My footwork, footwork, footwork...I need to practice! Ok, I'm dead tired and I gotta stop and save some energy.

Oh the main speaker is here and her baby is adorable!!! Oh, she has my girl/choreographer's name Genevieve... Alrite, gotta practice on the mic before people get here. Michael is so relaxed as always so I'm never gonna know if he's nervous. I'm surprised the nerves haven't kicked in just yet. That's good or bad. Wow, the mic is powerful! And I got a big voice....so I gotta move back at least 12 inches from the mic. Wow!

Alrite gotta go get dressed downstairs. Alrite, 2 costume changes. I love my outfits! Of course I picked them out and designed them... Ok, let me take some pics of myself in the bathroom dressed before the I go up. Don't get too carried away...can't be late for the performance, the dance!!

Practice the turn, I've been doing something funky since dress rehearsals yesterday with the first turn. Alrite rush up... Drink a sip, not the whole bottle, last thing I need is a full belly and I can't belly dance..

Oh..here's my turn...alrite relax, don't tense up, it's just like yesterday...Wow the sun is bright behind me...I wish someone could take a pic of me up here but no cameras...ok...here goes the music... ooo a little wobbly on the squat but no one noticed...ok not as relaxed as i should be...look straight ahead..scared that i'll lose focus if i look at someone as i dance...ok...the next turn feels okay....ok, halfway done...breathe..breathe..it's the slow section...about to pick back up the pace so BREATHE!..alrite almost done....next turn...extend the arms..i'm tired...come on breathe...keep your form...it's almost over...breahte...keep the rhythm...crap i screw up the footwork..worst than i've done before...keep at it...ok...last turn stick it...phew...good...

and they're clapping and they're not suppose to...that's a good thing..ok walk off...run down and change quick for the next set!!!

alrite quick change time.....take off your shoes...ooo...the floor's cold...no one's in the bathroom with me....ok...hopefully nobody will freak out seeing me basically naked in the bathroom...alright ...new outfit...think i'll stay barefoot when i sing....no need for shoes...more comfy that way...natural....now i see why those pop stars in those concert video footages need those extra handlers in the changing room as they do quick costume changes...i wish i had someone with me now but oh well...soon enough...ok...makeup good go up..

ooh...we have some time...good...michael is rehearsing on his guitar...let's take some pics...i really like my dress...can i warm up a bit...go downstairs....i wish i could sing full out right now....but i'll disrupt people...ok 15 mins pass...go in...

alrite...everyone's looking at us...well of course...still feel a little weird....i'm on stage...and i'm not nervous...wow...alrite...remember to sit back the mic is powerful and my voice is big too...

michael's starting the arpeggio...alrite look at the audience...take deep breaths....ok here comes the opening belt...i'm jumping a whole octave within 2 words...ugh..i didn't hit it the way i wanted...here it comes again...better but not as great...ok...well we got the rest of the song to go...i'm comfortable out here...

2nd verse...change the style a bit like we've been practicing...a little wobbly here...ok here's the bridge...remember the repeat in the 2nd line of the bridge my new softer voice pops in...take a deep breath...i've been out of breath here before...ok...here comes Michael's solo....

ok...3rd verse...toughest verse...especially the first line...ooo....i hit it perfect....wow..did i do that..ok it feels good....next verse...wait...wait...he just cut me off.....michael just cut me off!!!...there's another verse before his 2nd solo....ok is he gonna recover and let me do the 4th verse...NO...what!!!...just sit back....let him do his second solo.....ok...that wasn't cool...ooh..he's hitting the arpeggios perfectly cool....i gotta get it together...don't get too comfy..

alright get ready for the 5th verse....remember it's the newer softer sexier voice...take a deep breath...

ok....get closer to the mic for this part....ok...good, last bridge sexy then big...

ok last verse..the big big belt...it feels good...good...and it's done...

oh....they are clapping....they're not suppose to clap...wow....they never clap for anyone....i knew they would do it for the dance but for my singing and michael's playing..wow..ok..

shyness is hitting me...walk off...

alright quick change for the coffee after show...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ok...the booker told me to stay by this table while people mingle...it feels weird...

ugh..i'm so mad they didn't put Michael in the program when I specifically told them to put his name and his website in the program...ugh..definitely not cool...

ooh..people are coming up...not as shy this time..hmm..

"wow..amazing...such an artist.."

"do you have any cds, i want to listen to your stuff..what's your website."

"such a deep deep rich voice...wow.."

"you inspire me...."

"how long have you been performing...can you teach a master class at the community college where I teach?"

"fabulous..."

"such a blessing..."

"do you teach?.."

"please contact this booking agent...they promote new acts and I would love to see you...I know him..tell him that I sent you and I will only go to his restaurant only if you perform...."

"i saw you perform last year, when you did your opening dance....it inspired me...I lost my husband 1 year prior and I was depressed and seeing you peform made me come out of my shell and I put myself out there and I started to date....all because you amazed me and inspired me by your performance...I'm so grateful and happy you are here again....."

WOW...did these people all say this to me???? Wow...I gotta stop performing...I need to better perfect my craft...they think I'm great but they deserve that much more...i can't disrespect the art...i haven't payed my dues yet...wow...I'm humbled...

gosh..i really need to get the official website up and get business cards.....gotta work out..gotta do that photoshoot..

Ok, I gotta keep plugging Michael's site cuz he accompanied me...amazing job...ooo..here comes some people asking him if he has a CD and where he plays..great...gotta keep plugging....

alrite it's done...and let's go eat Michael....

wow..i inspired someone to live life and start dating after losing her husband...simply by performing... wow...

i'm humbled... wow..

AVIANA

P.S. Jordin Sparks with "One Step At A Time"

5 days till showtime!!!

2008-08-18T21:43:00.009-04:00

Hi All!!!!!

I hope all is well. I'm doing cool.. :)

Well, I got a gig this Sunday as you have read in my previous posts. I'm rehearsing, at the gym, rehearsing, working, dealing with costuming...alot of stuff!

Costuming has me real nervous. I got a jacket custom made. I was freaking out about that but it came out awesome! Now, the thing is I have to dye it jet black. Luckily I found a place in NYC that will do it in 24 hours for beacoup bucks! ugh...but they said they can get it to me by Friday which is great cuz the show is sunday.

I'm not rehearsing as much as I would like with my new guitarist which is a major bummer but hopefully things pan out this week.

The dance...the dance...it's horrid!!!.. No i'm not saying the choreography. The choreography is awesome! But, I have no stamina and 1 week is simply not enough time to clean it and build up stamina. Wow...well i decided to train for a half-marathon that is on October 11 in Baltimore. Yes the show is this Sunday but I got the competition in December. Remember the piece is gonna be more than twice as long as this piece I'm working right now which is 2 min 20secs long. It doesn't seem long but when you're dancing at a high level and fast paced non-stop, it's killer! I don't know how i'm gonna make it with a 5 min long piece. Oh well, gotta hit the pavement tomorrow running...

Here is a video of a friend of mine named Alicia Cundall. She is originally from Tanzania and now lives Victoria, British Columbia, Canada and Toronto, Canada. Such a beautiful spirit she is..... She was in DC for 3 months in the spring. As you can see she plays the harp, sings, and she plays the piano and guitar. This is a Tanzanian song she took and created her own lively creation on her harp for the Tanzanian children. My heart is humbled when I think of her...and to know that she is a friend of mine....she's only 20 years old and her spirit is such a beautiful, old, innocent peaceful one....

I'm not saying this just to compliment her...but I am trully humbled and blessed that our paths have crossed and I can call her a friend...

Ok...

Question for you...can a connection that was once pure and beautiful and filled with possibilities, then turned sour and vacant be reborn again as pure and beautiful and made to last?

AVIANA

P.S. Alicia Cundall...

Happy Weekend..!!

2008-08-08T07:17:00.003-04:00

Hey There!

The video is an excerpt from a flamenco show by Tony Gatlif. The show was in France. These are some amazing dancers. My favorite is Prado Jimenez. She's the one in the jeans with the crazy long hair. That's her in the picture.

Can't stay for too long. I'm in the midst of mad rehearsals, working a regular schedule, classes, hitting the gym, getting my costume fitted...blah, blah...all for the upcoming gig on August 24! It's in 2 weeks!!! Aaaaahh!

I know it's not a major showcase but it is still a performance and I have to give it my best. Again, I'm singing a flamenco tangos piece. The same one i performed in May with Marija but it is a completely different feel. I'm using a different guitarist this time around named Michael.

I had dance rehearsals last nite and again tonite and more and more the next couple of weeks! All while working a regular schedule.

Ok, gotta go....enjoy this video. I'm in-love with it!

Muah!

AVIANA

Quick Update...

2008-07-23T11:45:00.009-04:00

Hi ALL!!

I'm sorry I have not been too consistent with the posts but i've been crazy busy with work, dance rehearsals, classes, development work for an NGO I'm working for based out of Tanzania, development work for a non-profit performing arts society and everything else!! Oh by the way, I decided to form a production a company too...

I know, I know, I know...it's crazy...

But I want to have control over my art and promote others too...

Yes, i'm crazy...

I love it and I hate it...in terms that I have to work a regular job too at a law firm during the day....UGH! I can't wait till one of these things takes off, in particular my music, so I can quit the regular day job..

Oh yeah too, I have a small gig August 24 and I'm a trying out a new guitarist named Michael. He's awesome it's just that this is the very first time I'm working with someone besides my regular guitarist/teacher, Marija, who is in a class by herself. She's going to be away on vacation so she can't accompany me at my gig.. :( But she will return and take her regular spot. Oh that's Marija in the picture to the right.

It's good though that I'm working with other musicians because I need to learn how to work with other musicians.... it's that simple... it helps me with my creativity, how to communicate my music, my voice...especially with Flamenco!!!! Flamenco is an intimate language between, the dancer, singer, and guitarist. I'm not being poetic here it is the truth...in particular when you are doing improv.

The gig, I'm performing a Flamenco Tangos piece with Michael on guitar. He will be accompanying me as I sing. Additionally I will be dancing a fusion Tribal Bellydance/Flamenco piece too. It will be a short gig but good experience nonetheless.

I'm at the gym non-stop, and at rehearsals. Me and Michael have only met a couple of times but we'll be cranking it up soon enough if our schedules allow...well they're gonna have to...it's coming up soon!

The gym!!! Ugh...My performance outfit! I think I've picked out my dancing outfit. Of course I will have my belly out cuz it's BELLYDANCE!! I'm buying it online Friday and hopefully I'll love it and it will love me when I put it on!

Oh yea....I've started taking photography lessons...hehe...I know it's crazy!....I've been doing digital photography for a little bit...teaching myself really.. Saturday, the teacher saw some of my photographs and he loved them so much he showed several of my photographs as examples for the class!! He was so blown away by my pics..... I was so excited.....

I won't write for too long. I promise to visit all of your blogs during the weekend. I have neglected you all but I've been crazy busy...

Please watch this video from beginning to end! It's my main bellydance instructor...the incomparable SUHAILA SALIMPOUR! This is completely improvisational. Watch the level of muscle control she has....no one can do this! This is her in Cairo last year. Watching this video makes me want to practice so much...but sigh my schedule...in particular work...

anyhow...talk to you soon...

AVIANA

P.S. Suhaila Salimpour doing improv....live in Cairo, Egypt...

I was going to put a happy post...but...

2008-07-17T10:44:00.011-04:00

A 25-year-old New York City graduate student is threatening to sue a T-Shirt designer after being assaulted for wearing one of his designs.
The woman bought a $69 shirt from Apollo Braun's Manhattan boutique that bore the words, "Obama is my slave." When she wore the shirt on Tuesday, four teenage girls accosted her -

The designer pictured wearing the shirt.
Photo by Fashion Indie

and spitting in her face, according to the New York edition of Metro News.
The unnamed woman is reportedly seeking solace by suing Braun - born Doron Braunshtein - for "all he's got," the designer claims. He, of course, is shirking any responsibility for the incident and says that the shirt reflects the views of "ordinary WASPs."

“For a lot of people, when they see Obama, they see a slave. People think America is not ready for a black president,” the Israeli-born designer said.

“I can’t stand Obama,” Braun says, but claims that it's not because the candidate is black. “That’s the only thing I like about him. He opens the door for other minorities.”

“He reminds me of Adolf Hitler,” Braun explained, adding he does not like the Illinois senator because “he is a Muslim” — a myth that Obama apparently cannot escape.

The designer has sold several other anti-Obama styles from his boutique, including shirts with slogans such as “Jews Against Obama,” “Obama = Hitler” and “Who Killed Obama?”

http://www.livesteez.com/news/news_detail/934

___________________________________________________________________

The Rev. Jesse Jackson used the N-word during a break in a TV interview where he criticized presidential candidate Barack Obama, Fox News confirmed Wednesday.

The longtime civil rights leader already came under fire this month for crude off-air comments he made against Obama in what he thought was a private conversation during a taping of a "Fox & Friends" news show.

In additional comments from that same conversation, first reported by TVNewser, Jackson is reported to have said Obama was "talking down to black people," and referred to blacks with the N-word when he said Obama was telling them "how to behave."

Though a Fox spokesman confirmed to The Associated Press that Jackson used the slur, the network declined to release the full transcript of the July 6 show and did not air the comments.
Jackson, who is now traveling in Spain, apologized in a statement last Wednesday for "hurtful words" but didn't offer specifics.

"I am deeply saddened and distressed by the pain and sorrow that I have caused as a result of my hurtful words. I apologize again to Senator Barack Obama, Michelle Obama, their children as well as to the American public," Jackson said in a written statement.

"There really is no justification for my comments and I hope that the Obama family and the American public will forgive me. I also pray that we, as a nation, can move on to address the real issues that affect the American people."

A spokeswoman for Jackson's civil rights organization, Rainbow/PUSH Coalition, said she could not confirm that Jackson used the slur.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/07/16/jackson.nword.ap/index.html

P.S. Katie Melua with "Spider's Web"....the song is about the US invasion into IRAQ/the Iraq War.....but thought it is still fitting

Check this out...

2008-07-06T23:44:00.001-04:00

Hi All,

Please watch this video! The singers in the video are Lori and George Schappell. They are real life conjoined twins. They have a music video they released. They have acted on TV shows. I just found this video. Check it out. Amazing...

New Direction..

2008-06-24T08:56:00.029-04:00

Hello All..

As promised, I am back with a post on Wednesday. Yay! I kept my word. It does get hard keeping up with the posts with my busy life but what keeps me coming are the few people that make time to check out what's going on in my life.

Well, as stated in my previous post, there is something that has come up in my journey...my journey into the entertainment business...my journey in life...Something that has hit me hard but yet lovingly..

I don't want to be FAMOUS...

Yes, you read that right. I don't want to be famous. I guess what I really mean is that my study of music, my peformances, my dancing, my singing, my creativity, my blog...all of them...are no longer driven with the want to be FAMOUS...

I started this blog a couple years ago to track my road into the music business. I had all these ideas of selling out arenas, world tours, red carpets, hanging out with the stars...etc... I thought that would help validate my success, my music, me...

I thought all of this at the same time that I made it part of my mission that by achieving my dreams I hope that I would inspire people to live their dreams....because I trully believe that if everyone pursued their dreams then the world would be at peace, there would be unity....

I strongly believed and still do believe that people can identify with me more than the typical starlet. I have alot more things in my way, i believe...it may be naive.. I'm not 18 years old, I don't look like a beauty queen, I'm not a size 2, I don't have support from anyone, I have a job that doesn't do anything for my soul, for humanity, except bring money for the few by doing mundane routine tasks, I have over $100,000 school loans to pay back!!!! I don't have the long years of consistent music/dance/singing training. The list goes on and on...

But in March of 2005 I decided to take control of my life and do what I could to achieve my "far-fetched/impossible" dreams. I've had so many moments of doubts, where I thought I should give this up. But then I have those small moments of "WOW..I've done so much...I've written actual full-length songs on my own...I've performed them...people who've heard them love them...I'm competiting in solo dance competitions...I'm teaching bellydance lessons..."

In addition, I realize despite the long-length of time I've spent saving money for Colombia/Spain, I'm actually at the point where I can put an actual date of when I'm leaving on my Colombian/Spanish journey. It's taken me 2 and half years but it's actually going to happen..February 2009!

I can't wait to immerse myself in the cultures, in particular the Spanish and flamenco culture in Spain. I'll be killing myself with dance and voice lessons there and starving since I won't have much money. But...I don't want to live any other way. I'll be in an orphanage in Cartagena, Colombia and hopefully finally meet my Colombian music idol in person. Our pen-pal relationship has grown and I can only imagine our first face to face meeting. I hope I don't build it up so high that I'm deflated when I meet her. I don't think it could deflate...I care for her life, her health, her happiness.... She is just a wonder...

My spiritual/music/life journey can not be accompanied with the major desire for the superficial. Well, it can....as long as it is for the positive. As long as it helps me realize what is more important to life, to humanity...unity, peace, happiness..

I know I'm saying this and watch how now I say I don't want to be famous and all of sudden that's when it happens... Well...I just will have to keep reminding myself of the bigger picture. Like I said earlier, a selfish superficial desire is not conducive to the greater good...unless it helps you later realize the greater need of unity, peace and happiness for humanity...

No I have not lost my desire to create music and perform, as a matter of fact, my desire to create and perform has only increased 10folds. Although I didn't come out with the immediate ability to sing perfectly or to create symphonies or to dance with the perfect technique....a gift was given to me... It is up to me realize this HUGE gift I was blessed with, it is up to me to develop despite the odds....It is up to me to inspire the way I would like to....

I know the gift of creativity/performance was given to me in a huge portion...everyone sees it...most importantly I see it... I've just been given extra obstacles to cross...

Fame is no longer the end goal.... THANK YOU!!!

So glad I realize this...

I fought this thought privately for awhile... I thought maybe I simply don't want to perform anymore because you can't want to perform and not want to be famous at the same time, right?

Wrong.... I'm glad I came to this realization...on my own...

Don't think I still won't fret on how many more sizes I have to go before I'm a size 2, or if you like my music, my voice etc... But that no longer drives the reason to be fully engulfed in my creativity...to live life as the artist I would like to be...

That is why I am changing the title of my blog from "AVIANA...Coming to an arena near you" to simply "AVIANA...."

My spirit is growing.....where to...I don't know..But it's growing.. Like John Mayer says "I'm bigger than my body..." I hope that you will continue on this journey with me...arena tours or not...

I will continue to delve on the usual topics such as my music journey, my rants, boys, fashion, the mundane, spirituality and more...

I did say this awhile ago, I am going through some sort of metamorphosis.... I hope you are willing to watch me grow and hopefully you will grow too..Hopefully I will inspire you...hopefully you will inspire me and..hopefully you will inspire others and so on..

Life is a winding road...it trully is...

Thank you for reading and following me on my journey...

AVIANA

P.S. Here's Madonna with Drowned World/Substitute for Love. This song is on the "Ray of Light" Album. I think this is the album where her quest for fame & the spotlight were eclipsed by the birth of her daughter and thus her spirituality came that much more in her consciousness. Thought this might be fitting for this post.

Madonnna with "Drowned World/Substitute for Love"

show thoughts....

2008-06-19T15:31:00.000-04:00

Hi All,

Isn't that a cool picture....

I hope all is well with you all.... I'm cool..you know? :)

Again, for the millionth time, I apologize for not keeping up with the posts. No major excuse except busy with work and stuff.

Well, as you read in "AVIANA-Show Experience" post, I had a gig a couple of weeks ago. I sang a Flamenco Tangos piece at this showcase. I originally planned on singing my song "Rise," however, I had issues writing the verse lyrics and thus decided not to sing it. I think it may have turned out to be a good thing because the crowd probably would not have been into it because it would have been too mellow for the crowd. It is a midtempo beat song, however I would have done the acoustic version of it with just me on piano which would have been a ballad. The crowd was very welcoming but I think it would have dragged things down a bit. Well who knows, maybe it wouldn't have mattered.

Anyhow, the Flamenco Tangos piece went awesome as you read in the previous post. Yay! I've already booked another gig in August. Yay! I'm not sure if I am looking for more gigs for the moment actually... Yes I know that sounds a bit odd but I want to better perfect my craft..to be truer to the art...

You know, after the show I was on such a high that it lasted for 2 days! It felt great but I also felt some guilt and some anxiety of sorts. I felt that I was being selfish by just being the only one to feel this high. Weird? I mean, I sincerely hoped I inspired people to follow their dreams when I performed. However, that didn't seem like enough. I contacted a friend in Vancouver and he told me to find a person who was having a bad day and spend time with them. I thought that was odd but thought about it.... I thought about people I could have contacted but it was like 10:30pm on a Saturday and everyone was out and I couldn't really think of anyone really having a problem...

hmmm...I guess I wasted some energy...but I now know for next time...

Anyhow, I won't keep you guys on for too long... I wanted to get into something I've been thinking about for awhile now.. However, I think it is best for the next post... I promise to have it up by next Wednesday!

I think it will come to a shock to alot of you. It certainly came as a shock when this presented itself to me.

I'll leave you guys...

Have a nice weekend... Stay tuned for the next post...

Oh, if you happen to live near Victoria, British Columbia, Canada...please check out TWOFEST. It is a 3-day concert festival with the theme of taking back the environment. It is a grassroots festival. Some amazing talent will be there. The major themes are unity through diversity and taking back the planet.

It started last night, goes on tonite and ends tomorrow night...(June-18-June 20).

Then TWOFEST is heading to China in the Fall...

We all can do something about the environment...

Here's Naseem Khozein who is one of the performers at TWOFEST. I of course won't be there since I don't live over there. Isn't she awesome and beautiful!

Have a nice weekend!

AVIANA

P.S. Naseem Khozein

PROUD..

2008-06-13T05:47:00.007-04:00

Do you notice the caption?!???1!! "OBAMA'S Baby Mama"

I'm in the middle of writing a newsletter for a non-profit due today and about to go to work and I see this!

Do they refer to John McCain's wife as "McCain's Baby Mama?" Do they refer to John Edwards' wife as "Edwards' Baby Mama?" Do they refer to Clinton's wife as "Clinton's Baby Mama before and after she became a politician? Do they refer to Bush's wife as "Bush's Baby Mama?"

WHY???!!! Because she is Black/African-American woman??!

This is sickening, appalling, rude, crass, beneath simple-minded, RACIST, repulsive, conniving, filthy..

And NO, NO, NO, NO, NO NO, NO, NO!!!! They did not do this by accident!!!! It didn't slip through anyone's supervision at FOX news.

Are you proud that you share the same thought process as the slave masters who raped, tortured, beat, and killed Africans in the United States and all over the world. Because I am sure they would have said something like this.

Are you proud that you share the same thought process as the white slave master who grabbed that black woman slave and raped her constantly in every unimaginable way possible at his own will? Because rape is not simply a penis going inside a vagina...

Are you proud that you share the same thought process as the white mob that grabbed countless black men and women from their homes in the middle of the night, tied their legs to the back of pickup trucks and dragged their bodies to their deaths?

Are your actions on the broadcast showcase what it means to be an American?

Are you proud?

Are you proud?...Are you proud? ....

Tell me....Tell the world...

Are you proud?

P.S. Picture found on www.bossip.com and www.salon.com