Thoughts and Tirades, Rants and Ruminations

Update

2008-04-07T21:27:00.001-07:00

Anybody looking for recent entries should head over here:

www.josephmallozzi.wordpress.com

February 14, 2008

2008-03-10T14:48:00.003-07:00

Finally, after days of searching, cutting, and pasting, that little side project I mentioned in yesterday’s entry is finally complete. If you’d like to check out all of Baron Destructo’s replies to email scammers, Cookie Monster’s lengthy correspondence with barrister James Williams, or the progression of Aloysius P. Hazzencockle’s dream home from phishing fantasy to meurtiere-outfitted sneaker-making orphan castle (and can’t be bothered to go through the time-consuming process of running a search on this blog) head here:

http://spambait.wordpress.com/

More slow and laborious progress on the Whispers script today, but I’m pleased to report that I am finally out of the Beckett -Porter scene. I was actually on a bit of a roll this morning (if half a page can be considered a roll - which, in my case, it can) only to be distracted by: 1) an impromptu gathering of the writers to spin four possible new story ideas including a sequel to that season 4 episode and the possibility of revisiting the SG-1-themed and shelved Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow, 2) the unwelcome suggestion that we shoot parts of Whispers at Fantasy Gardens, 3) two guys unloading what appeared to be a stasis pod from their truck parked beneath my office window (pictured), 4) what the hobbits refer to as “second breakfast”, and 5) an interesting online article about the Pentagon’s plans to take out a 5 000 pound rogue spy satellite with a missile and prevent it from coming down on a populated area. Nice to know. Still, just in case, for most of early March I’ll be watching the sky and wearing my running shoes.

A quickie book club reminder. We begin discussion of Fast Forward 1, edited by Lou Anders, on Monday (February 18th). Come armed with opinions and questions for Lou will be swinging by to take on all comers. The following Monday (February 25th), we’ll be discussing Neil Gaiman’s Smoke and Mirrors. Then, the Monday after that (March 3rd) we’ll discuss the third book of our BOTM triumvirate: Children of the Night, by Dan Simmons.

And since some of you asked, here are a few of the websites I surf at work when I should really be writing -

http://io9.com/

http://gizmodo.com/

http://www.newscientist.com/home.ns

http://antwrp.gsfc.nasa.gov/apod/astropix.html

http://www.mediapundit.net/

http://gridskipper.com/

http://www.zap2it.com/

http://www.joeabercrombie.com/news.htm

http://www.scalzi.com/whatever/

Today’s pics: Concept art, Captain Alicia Vega, What the hell is going on down there?

The mailbag returns sometime in the not too distant future.

February 13, 2008

2008-03-10T14:48:00.001-07:00

“It doesn’t close properly,”I informed the trained technician who was carefully sizing up my garage door. “It’ll lower until it gets about a half a foot off the ground, and then it just springs back up again.” He requested a demonstration. More than happy to oblige, I hit the remote. The garage door hummed down and kissed the floor. Click. “Uh, hang on a second.” I hit the remote again, raising the door, then hit it again. The garage door reversed direction and lowered, settling down gently. Click. SONOVA - !!! For the first time in its 2+ years of operation, the damn thing was actually working! And it just happened to be working the one time I finally call in a repairman. I scanned the garage for the gremlin that was no doubt rejoicing over my misfortune. Perhaps sensing my frustration, the technician leaned in for a closer look, pulled out a wrench, and proceeded to make some minor adjustments. He took out a screwdriver and gave one of the buttons at the back of the central remote a half-twist. He sprayed lubricant on the coils. And, oh yeah, replaced the wall unit’s shattered panel (Now THAT I could prove was broken.). He checked to be absolutely sure. The garage door rose, then lowered without a hitch. All five times he tested it.

Well apparently, the problem was solved (as most problems tend to be solved) by a good night’s sleep. Alternately, it’s also possible that the remote, still stinging from yesterday’s right cross, thought better than to provoke me again. So I’m sure you’ll all be thrilled to hear that my garage door is working. For now.

Guess who was at the Bridge Studios for a costume fitting today? None other than Jason Momoa, a.k.a. Stargate Atlantis’s Ronon Dex. And he was sporting his new do. As many readers of this blog (and fans of the show already know), Jason cut off his dreadlocks at the end of season 4 because they had started causing him neck problems. According to Jason, without the six pounds of hair that had been weighing him down (6lbs!), he felt strangely unbalanced at first. Nevertheless, he readjusted and has been enjoying the freedom and feel of his new look. However, very soon, he’ll be undergoing the two day/16 hour process that will re-attach the dreads for our season premiere. For continuity’s sake, his character has to have them in for our first episode - but I have given him the option of losing them completely later in the season. Although many, especially Jason, feel that the dreads are a unique part of the Ronon character, the ultimate decision as to whether he keeps them or not will rest with him. It’s his neck after all.

I’ve been working on a little side project I hope to unveil tomorrow, so I’ll have to skip the mailbag yet again today. Hopefully these pics of Jason Momoa will tide you over.

And, by the way, yesterday’s post beat the standing traffic record of 10 691 views for this wordpress blog (set on January 24, 2008). The new record = 12 709 views. Boy, do you guys love that Carl Binder!

February 12, 2008

2008-03-10T14:47:00.003-07:00

A rather inauspicious start to the day found me playing Mr. Fixit with my garage door remote at 8:00 a.m. this morning. For some reason, the door has a nasty habit of lowering until it’s about half a foot off the ground and then suddenly stopping and reversing, rising until I hit the remote a second time, causing it to descend and close. If I’m lucky. If I’m unlucky, I’ll hit the remote and the door will come down, stop and reverse again, necessitating a second click to reverse direction once again and get it to close. If I’m especially unlucky, as was the case today, the garage door will descend, stop, reverse, I’ll hit the remote, reverse direction, only to have it stop, reverse, causing me to hit the remote again, getting it to reverse direction, only to have it stop, reverse, necessitating another jab at the remote, causing it to switch direction, and stop, reverse… Adding to the fun is the fact that I’ve already set the house alarm, meaning I have exactly one minute to get the damn thing shut before the sirens start blaring and the crazed ferrets are released. Eventually, frustration set in and I headed back inside where I disabled the alarm and tried to use the wall unit remote to close the garage door. It hummed down, got about a half a foot off the ground, then rose up again. I swept the area for leaves and invisible detritus, made sure the sensors were clear, then tried again. Hum. Stop. And back up it went. Again. And again. And again! I tried holding down the remote. Tapping the remote. Even putting my fist through its plastic casing. Nothing worked. In the end, I closed the door manually, dug up Fondy’s remote, went through her side of the garage (which she has been using as a storage space, requiring her to park out front), and called up a “trained technician” who will be swinging by tomorrow to fix the problem. Oh, and replace the wall unit I punched to pieces.

Despite the delay, I got in about five minutes before the prosthetics meeting. We discussed upcoming episodes Whispers, The Daedalus Variations, The Seed, and Broken Ties. Among the subjects covered: visual versus practical effects, stunt people vs. acrobats, fog, elements of the visual we saw in Spoils of War, yogurt, and, of course, methacil.

Captain Alicia Vega, a.k.a. Leela Savasta, was in for her costume fitting this morning and swung by the production offices. She’s a very sweet young lady who was genuinely surprised to learn she’d already become the talk of many a fan forum - without even having shot a scene yet.

And - hey, look who’s back! Yep, Carl Binder turned up for work today! And he brought us a present: his first draft of Ghost in the Machine. To show our appreciation, we got him a cake and sang Happy Birthday (this despite the fact that he won’t be celebrating his birthday until August). Check out the pics, especially the last one. Have you ever seen a happier-looking birthday boy?

Not bad. Not bad at all. Since I started blogging here on wordpress, this blog has consistently hit the Top 25 out of some 3 million wordpress blogs (#15 as I write this) and each individual entry the daily Top 10 of the 100 000 or so daily posts (#3 as I write this). Impressive, sure, but it’s apparently still no match for CNN’s political ticker, FOX news online, or adorable cat pictures.

Oh, and for those of you wondering about the footage of the scene I posted in last night’s entry - yes, it will be available as a dvd special feature.

A gentle reminder to finish/start reading Fast Forward 1: Future Fiction from the Cutting Edge and prepare your questions for editor Lou Anders who will be swinging by the blog next week.

And to all those of you thinking of attending either of the Fuel fan dinners (April 1st, 7:00 p.m. or April 3rd, 7:00 p.m.) - if you haven’t made a reservation yet, book now to avoid disappointment! Marty G. will be joining us for both nights.

February 11, 2008

2008-03-10T14:47:00.001-07:00

Well, I completed all of two pages on Whispers today, finally hitting that all-important 10 page mark but, more importantly, establishing the other team: Captain Alicia Vega, Lieutenant Anne Teldy, Sergeant Dusty Wells, and Dr. Alison (with one L) Porter. Carson will be in for a treat - when he’s not fighting for his life. Come tomorrow, I’ll probably rewrite the whole thing anyway but, hey, it’s a start. A slow, laborious start.

A final of Alan McCullough’s Daedalus Variations came out today and we shifted focus to Alan’s second - extreme Shep-whumpage - script, co-storied by Robert C. Cooper. With the writers’ strike hopefully over, Carl will finally be delivering his masterpiece which we’ll be fast-tracking into the #5 slot.

Jewel and hubby Matt swung by the production offices today. Jewel was in for a fitting while Matt was on the lot shooting another show. We talked horror movies, Watchmen, and, of course, what we have in store for Keller in season 5. Like Rachel, she was excited about some of the planned developments - but understandably a anxious about episode #2, The Seed, especially since I told her she’d have to get in for 4:00 a.m. every morning so that prosthetics could get an early jump on the body cast process which would take about 3-4 hours. “The trick is not to breathe too much or let the latex touch your skin,”I advised, “as it’s not only toxic but highly corrosive. Anyway, relax and have fun with it.” She wasn’t sure whether I was kidding or not.

Speaking of which - the prosthetics meeting with Todd Master has been moved to tomorrow morning. For Whispers, I’d like something elegantly simple yet shockingly terrifying. I can’t wait to see what Todd and the gang come up with.

No mailbag today as the next scene came to me while I was driving home tonight and I’d like to get it down before I forget. But, to tide you over, here’s that snipped scene from Trio. A little chat between Carter and Keller as they are knotting up that rope:

Carter: So…you seeing anyone?

Keller: What?

Carter: Around the base, you seeing anyone?

Keller: I dunno…I had a moment with - with this…guy. He’s not exactly easy to read so…I guess the short answer is “no”. You?

Carter: Well, I’m the boss, so I can’t really…

Keller: Right Anyone back home?

Carter: Uhm…

Keller: Un-huh, I thought so. Give it up.

Carter: Well, it’s complicated.

Keller: Show me a relationship that isn’t.

Carter: He’s in Washington…I’m here.

Keller: Ouch. Long distance relationship.

Carter: He’s going to retire soon, so maybe -

Keller: Really! Retire? So…an older man, huh?

Carter: Not that much older.

Keller: Washington, older man…is he like a Senator or something? Someone famous? Would I know him?

Carter: Probably not.

February 10, 2008

2008-03-10T14:46:00.001-07:00

Fondy and I have done a fair amount of moving around since our move to Vancouver 8+ years ago. Our first home in the city was The Sutton Place, the choice of many out-of-town actors/directors/producers who like to while away the late hours hanging out in the hotel bar, The Gerard. While the Sutton is well-located in the heart of downtown, it was in desperate need of a refurnishing when we holed up there for all of four months. Eventually, we grew tired of the place (and in particular the concierge whose lame restaurant recommendations included a sub-par Japanese restaurant where the sushi selections floated by on little boats that circled the main bar) and moved over to the Pacific Palisades. Another great location in the heart of downtown (although, quite honestly, this city has little downtown to speak of), we lived there for two years - until Fondy got creeped out by the fact that the building’s cleaning staff had access to our apartment 24/7. One day while she was home alone, she stepped out of the bedroom to discover someone had stopped by and dropped off the mail while she was showering. That did it. We left the downtown area and moved over to the trendy Yaletown district. The area was a lot quieter and much more scenic, with several dog parks within easy walking distance, and our building boasted a lovable Italian security guard who thought he was T.J. Hooker. We loved it - until the day the fire alarm went off and I had to negotiate 19 floors with three pugs, two of who were absolutely terrified to walk down the stairs. In time, the area grew more congested, noisier, and when the drug dealers moved into the neighborhood - sorry, I meant to say “surprisingly affluent young pitbull owners” moved into the neighborhood, we knew it was time to go. Finally, Fondy got what she’d wanted since we’d moved here from Montreal: a house.

It’s been about three years since we moved into this quiet neighborhood. To our left live three generations of a Chinese family. Dad, apparently some sort of martial arts expert, is always in his backyard practicing his routine, driving Bubba into a barking frenzy with his kung fu breathing exercises. He never smiles, never makes eye contact, and does his best to avoid any sort of social interaction - which is why, whenever I spot him outside, I make it a point to wave and say hi. Grammy and gramps are presumably his folks since they share in his general distaste for acknowledging the presence of others (“Hello!”my unwitting mother greeted the elderly couple one fine morning. They responded by silently staring back at her as if she’d broken wind.) The grandfather didn’t exactly enamor himself to Fondy who, perhaps assuming Fondy couldn’t understand Cantonese, commented rather loudly one day: “Is that thing out in her garden again?” Clearly, he’s not a fan of my wife’s horticultural skills. We never see the kids but mom, Daphne, is pleasant enough. To our right live an elderly couple, Ted and Dorothy (I always imagine Dorothy Hamill pair skating with Ted Danson to help me remember their names). They were a nice, quiet couple - until the day Fondy went off on the guy they’d hired to weed their lawn. The fact that the guy was sending herbicide wafting over the fence into our backyard where the dogs were playing didn’t sit too well with Fondy. And the fact that Fondy let him have it evidently didn’t sit well with Ted who has nary spoken a word to us since. Dorothy, on the other hand, was kind enough to bake us some blueberry bread to thank us for collecting their mail while they were away last Spring. Across from us lives an elderly woman who we rarely see. She pokes her head out of her front door about once every week to summon her cat and eye us suspiciously. Behind us live an adorable 70-something Italian couple, Tony and Rosa, who are always gifting us with fresh figs, cucumbers, and tomatoes from their garden. They go bowling every Wednesday and love discussing the weather. Two doors down lives Tony’s brother. The zucchini he planted in his garden last summer turned out to be pumpkin.

I love this house, especially after getting the home theater installed, but every once in a while Fondy will come across a house listing and start considering the possibilities (“Hey, this master bedroom has a walk-in closet!”). I’ve got the moving boxes on stand-by.

Today’s blog entry is dedicated to birthday girl AMZ (girl, right?) and Leila who will be undergoing out-patient surgery this Tuesday and will hopefully be back to her high-flying kick-boxing ways in no time.

Today’s mailbag -

Squall78 writes: “Some fans have said MGM cut the budget and it is likely why SGA got picked up for a 5th season.”

Answer: Untrue. In fact, if MGM had cut the budget, that would have actually worked against the show getting the pick-up. After all, why would the network invest in a show that promised less than the previous year in terms of onscreen quality?

Vvv0472 writes: “1) When did you find out that Amanda Tapping would not be able to be apart of the show in season 5? 2) When did you cast Robert Picardo for season 5?”

Answers: 1) Don’t remember when exactly, but I believe we received the news before leaving for the Christmas break - early December. 2) We made this decision about the same time.

Aelfgyfu writes: “I mostly enjoyed The Illusionist and think Baron Destructo missed something important: they couldn’t just leave the Crown Prince because he had a history of controlling and abusing women, and they believed he had killed at least one.”

Answer: The Baron misses nothing. The fact that the Crown Prince was purported to have such a history was introduced as a means to - a) paint the prince in the worst possible light (because merely being a manipulative boor was clearly not enough) so that the audience would sympathize with Sophie‘s plight, but more importantly b) bolster the magician’s motivation to rescue Sophie from a possible terrible marriage. Never is it stated, even suggested, that the ugly rumors circulating the Crown Prince are what drives the magician to orchestrate his death at movie’s end.

Tardishart writes: “ I am a little saddened that so many folks seem to think Keller is a loose women, god when did it become 1952 again?!”

Answer: 1952?! I was going to suggest Victorian England! Seriously, the fact that she “almost kisses” Ronon and then, months later, asks Rodney to join her for a drink is considered cheap and shameless behavior. The only possible reasoning I can think of for using this line of argument is either 1) The individuals doing the criticizing grew up in a sheltered environment where they were permitted few social interactions with the outside world, or, and this is a stretch 2) They really reeeeeeaching for any possible argument, no matter how ridiculous, to use against the character. God forbid she should change her hairstyle. Cries of “Harlot! Devil Woman!” will surely resound in whichever corridors of fandom these Prudence Goodwife’s happen to frequent.

LostCityGuardian writes: “do you believe that the fact that SGA season 4’s success (ratings and awards etc) has been influenced by the competition (other shows on SciFi and other channels) being hit by the Writer’s Strike? Or is it just because SGA is so damn good?”

Answer: Given the shift in overall television viewership and the increased use of Tivo, dvr, and digital downloads, it’s impossible to answer that question with any degree of certainty. All we can do is make the best show possible and, heading into season 5, that’s what we’ve done.

Anneteldy writes: “And some people become Wraith worshippers because they are ‘addicted’ to the pleasurable aspects of getting one’s life returned. How’d I do?”

Answer: You did great. How great? Check out season 5’s Broken Ties.

Aquarian writes: “Hey, Mister M. I was wondering if it’s possible to find out why Ms Higginson declined.”

Answer: I understand the fans’ desire to support Torri, but I don’t find it fair or helpful to speculate on the reasons for her declining the offer. As I wrote in yesterday’s entry, we fully respect and support Torri’s decision and wish her all the best. For the record, however, it wasn’t a specific script issue. The content of the script (which has yet to be delivered) was never even discussed.

Charles Schneider writes: “Now that a new season is about to begin production, do you see yourself shifting from hardcore book reading to some other interest?”

Answer: I’m thinking skeet shooting might be the way to go.

Fsmn36 writes: “Is music something that can make or break a movie/TV show for you?”

Answer: I suffer the curse of the writer - and, by extension, Fondy must suffer along with me. What makes or breaks a movie/TV show for me is the writing.

Jason writes: “Will the new Captain Vega character take away screen time from Major Lorne..?”

Answer: No. The introduction of the Vega character had nothing to do with lessening the onscreen presence of any existing characters (regulars or recurring) and everything to do with a genuine desire to expand our roster of familiar faces.

ElisaD writes: “I see from some previous comments that you can’t go into FFN website for legal reasons and I’m pretty sure that you knew that so your answer to me may have been to indicate that you “know nothing!””

Answer: Actually, no. I really didn’t know what FFN stood for.

Patricia writes: “Since Marty G. can’t make Thursday’s dinner, will you consider bringing Fondy or maybe a surprise guest? Also, should we let Fuel know individually which night we plan to be here, so they can plan accordingly? Or will you tally the total and book the back room which seats up to 45 for the 700 pm meal? Please let us know. Thanks again!”

Answer: I leave it to the fans to coordinate the fan ends of things. I’ve booked a table for two on both nights for 7:00 p.m. I thought it best to separate my bill from that of the fans since I possesses, uh, fairly extravagant tastes. Still, I’ll be working the room, chatting and tasting all of your desserts.

Inpa writes: “Ok, fair enough on the drink thing. But when one character asks another one out for a drink given the context of the episode (Her asking if he was still single, him saying he wasn’t very good at this stuff and then her acknowledging it when asking) it wasn’t a big leap to assume she was asking ‘asking’ him out for a drink. And if they did go out in that way then asking if they were going now isn’t that far a question, but from how the scene played out I didn’t take the question of a drink any other way.”

Answer: Okay, but I take “going out” to imply some sort of relationship.

longtime reader writes: “In Critical Mass Caldwell, from what I remember, had his symbiote removed by beam technology. Was there a specific reason why that was not done to Adria in Dominion because if they had beamed it out from another room then Ba’al would not have expected it, especially as he was unaware that Caldwell was implanted with one, and would not have released the poison that killed her.”

Answer: Totally different scenarios. In the case of Caldwell, he was in a controlled environment and it was Hermiod doing the extraction. Even so, we are reminded that the calculations are impossibly intricate. In lesser (read non-Asgard hands) I don’t know if it would have been successful.

Vvv0472 writes: “Weren’t the Genii supposed to be super secretive in their underground hiding places/society… it seems as though almost everyone in the galaxy knows that they aren’t simple farmers…”

Answer: They were, but as a result of their run-ins with Atlantis over the years and the shifting presence of the wraith, their super secret has been rendered…well, not so secret.

Janice writes: “I have read on other sites that “per canon” these kind of things always wind up on the cutting room floor. No disrespect intended, but if this is so, then why even bother filming them?”

Answer: You just answered your own question. Logic would dictate we wouldn’t write something we had no intention of keeping in the episode. But, sometimes, the script is running long and cuts need to be made. In the case of Trio, and despite a desire to keep the reference, it came out fairly easily without disrupting the flow of the scene or detracting from the story.

Rob writes: “So - apart from the confusion over pleats etc… were you happy with the finish product from Pacific Custom?”

Answer: Very happy. Just the other day, someone asked me where I’d purchased my suit. I told them I’d had it custom made in Hong Kong. Looking forward to heading back and adding some more suits to line-up.

Kikinostro writes: “Are you surprised by the generally negative reaction to Trio?”

Answer: Generally negative reaction? Although people have criticized various aspects of the episode, the feedback I’ve seen has been generally positive.

Jenny Robin writes: “I watched the Illusionist last weekend and very much enjoyed it. The explanations behind the ‘magic’ are discussed by the director on the commentary track.”

Baron Destructo: Really? The Baron would love to know how the director explained the trick in which an orange tree grows out of a pot and sprouts oranges. Do tell.

Itxas lamia writes: “…the most destacable one being the infamous ‘Zelenka bashing’ one.

[…]…honestly I can’t imagine Weir saying such things.”

Answer: In all fairness, there is a scene from the season 3 episode Common Ground in which two dozen pairs of women’s shoes are discovered in Zelenka’s closet including Weir’s missing patent leather pumps. Unfortunately, the scene was cut for time but the deleted footage can still be found among the boxset special features.

February 9, 2008

2008-03-10T14:45:00.001-07:00

Tonight, I’d like to welcome back this blog’s resident reporters on the Arts, Cookie Monster and Baron Destructo, as they join us for another round of movie reviews -

THERE WILL BE BLOODReviewed by Cookie Monster.

Dere Will Be Blood. Eventually. But it take a while. A loooong while. Almost two and half hours! Even still, dis very good movie dat keep Cookie Monster interested true-out. Is very sloooow moving but hypnotik story of turn-of-century prospektor played by Daniel-Day Lewis (Ganges of New York, Last of Mojito’s, My Two Left Feet). He go from dirt poor to dirt rich when score big oil strike - and also get bonus baby after piece of equipment clang off partner/baby-daddy noggin. Movie show how he get more powerful, buy up land, try to build pipeline, slap around preacher, get slap around by preacher, almost get conned, and score big deal. But at heart of story is relationship between progatonist and boy he raise as own dat go from beeootiful partnership to not-so-beeootiful so-long-see-you-later long distance relationship when kid go deff and try to crispy fry bedroom. Daniel-Day Lewis give incredible performance likes of which not seen since Fozzie Bear play part of Willie Lowman in off off off-Broadway kabuki performance of Death of Salesman. Veeery gruesome death of salesman. Not sure if same in original play but sure hope so because ritual seppuku very hard to top for entertainment value. Anyway, Lewis give very believable and restrain performance up until last scene when, during milkshake solililquee, he go off like Grover dat time he get short-changed by hooker wit wooden leg.

Overall, very good movie if you willing to immerse self in story. Progatonist self-destruct life and relationship wit adopted son very sad - but end of movie even sadder because just stop all of sudden as if producer say “Ah, dats enough. Let’s go home.”. Leave Cookie Monster sitting dere wondering What de Fudgee-O?

THE ILLUSIONIST

Reviewed by Baron Destructo

Should you find yourself in the mood for a period version of The Sting minus The Sting’s clever end-twist and its charming characters, then this is the movie for you. At times, The Illusionist - which tells the tale of a young magician who is reunited with a former love now betrothed to an unpleasant Viennese prince (which, given Baron Destructo’s experience, is about par for the course) and his plot to win her back - feels almost like a satire of whatever type of movie it is striving to be. And even now, I’m not quite sure what that is.

In a key moment in the film, the magician, reunited with his long lost love, suggests they run away - but she informs him fleeing is not an option. So long as she is alive, that evil Crown Prince will not stop looking for her. At this point in the movie, it doesn’t take a Professor Cerebellum to realize that the magician will proceed to pull off his greatest trick yet: the seeming death of the soon-to-be-Princess. The only question is how will he pull it off? What clever sleight of hand will he make use of? What tantalizing tricks and clever conjurations will win the day? Would you believe…none? Some sort of potion that presumably allows the imbiber to mimic a death-like state, although this is never really explained and only offered as a rapidfire piece-of-the-puzzle explanation in flashback. That and an incredible amount of dumb luck as secondary characters conveniently discover hidden clues when they need to be discovered, follow fleeing prospective princesses into barns where they are conveniently overcome by whatever drug they were administered back at the castle, conveniently witness what could be a murder but do nothing to stop or help the seeming victim as she rides off into the night (Oh, were The Fates only so kind to the Baron whose machinations have been undone by everything from superheroic interference to a resentful and unusually loquacious cyber-baboon.). The bride-to-be is found dead. The detective is on the case. The Crown Prince is a suspect. Despite the lack of any real evidence linking him to the murder, the Crown Prince stands accused. And kills himself. Finally, when all is said and seemingly done, the detective realizes he has been played and puts it all together (in a wholly unsatisfying montage intended to offer the presumably clever reveal of how the trick was done), a good hour or so after the audience has already gotten there, impatiently waiting around for the rest of the movie to play catch up.

But after all is explained away and the end credits roll, a couple of questions arise. Why? Why go through all the trouble of setting up the Crown Prince when the magician could have simply left town, been secretly reunited with his presumed dead love, and lived happily ever after? Why go through all the trouble of framing him for murder and manipulate him into killing himself? Because he was boorish? Is that a good enough reason. Of course it’s a good enough reason for Baron Destructo, but for the average magician? And what was the secret behind the magician’s act? His tricks are never explained (and, I would argue, could never be satisfactorily explained), so are we to assume that his magic is real? And, if so, couldn’t that real magic have come in handy in pulling off his rather amateurish fly-by-seat-of-one’s-pants hoax?

This was one of those rare movies that filled the Baron with a quiet rage that could only be quelled by a series of very particular stress-relieving exercises (one of which included loosening a horde of giant intoxicated boll weevils on Uzbekistan).

Of course, everyone is entitled to their opinion. Still, if you thought this film’s twist was either brilliant or unexpected, then the Baron has an M. Night Shyamalan movie to sell you.

Okay, hanks to both Baron Destructo and Cookie Monster for dropping by.

Finally, with regard to the fan night at Fuel - Some of you prefer April 1st. Others April 3rd. Finally, ShippyChick wondered whether it would be that much of a hardship for me to make it both nights. Upon further consideration - no, no it wouldn’t. So I’ve booked myself a table for both the Tuesday and the Thursday. Marty G. will definitely be joining us the Tuesday, but I’m not sure about the second night. This is probably for the best because, as PG15 pointed out, it’s not a huge place. I plan to be there for 7:00 p.m. both nights.

Oh, and for those of you assiduously ticking off the clues in the teaser poem as they line up with the episodes aired - Trio = “In an underground chamber the trio is stuck.” Darn, these are just too easy. The Last Man clue is a doozy though. Bet you didn’t see that one coming.

Today’s blog is dedicated to Karen and all of the other hardworking tech-support people out there, Anais33 on her blog’s first year celebration, and birthday gal Jelly.

Today’s mailbag -

Awesome sauce writes: “By the way, who’s idea was the Colbert reference?”

Answer: Marty G. scripted the Colbert reference.

Cat4444 writes: “Have you ever read “Into the Out Of”?”

Answer: No, but given everything I’ve heard so far in this comments section, it looks like a title I should pick up.

Wams352 writes: “ Although, nitpick - if she is so socially awkward, never had any friends (which is what I understood her to imply in Quarantine) how’d she learn any nifty bar/beer drinking games?”

Answer: There is a difference between having trouble fitting in and being completely friendless.

Shawna writes: “So, let me get this straight…there isn’t going to be any conclusion to wrap up that random and tantalizing teaser/cliffhanger scene because Torri decided not to do it?”

Answer: That is incorrect. The script will be revised, adjustments made, and that particular story will be told in season 5. We won’t leave you hanging.

Anne M. writes: “Hmm… did I miss it? I thought that you had mentioned the possibility of a contest in conjunction with the discussion of Sean Williams’ “The Crooked Letter”. Me bad if I missed when you mentioned in your blog.”

Answer: No. You’re right. I have to go back through the discussion and pick a couple of winners.

Mamasue9 writes: “Joe…if the dinner is on April 3rd, could MGM/Bridge stop you from attending any events while Creation is in town?”

Answer: What are they going to do? Stop us from eating? “You! Stop chewing! Put that fork down! You! Spit it out! Spit it out NOW!”

Dayse writes: “I was just looking back at the spoiler poem you posted in December and was wondering if this line:

The status quo shifts, a power play made.
The arrival of this one leave some feeling dismayed.refers to Woolsey taking coming to Atlantis?”

Answer: My, my, my. That does look like a good guess.

Henry writes: “Joe, have you experienced dinners at Chivana yet?”

Answer: I haven’t.

Paloosa writes: “A shake room would be a great way to teach people what it’s like and why they need to prepare. Any info on how it was built?”

Answer: Lots - but you’ll have to wait until the season 4 dvd set comes out to check out the very cool “Making of” feature that Ivon Bartok did for this particular episode. By the way - great links. I’m off to stock up on bottled water.

Prior of the Ori writes: “Don’t suppose we might see an episode that shows a Hive-ship being created?”

Answer: In the words of Cookie Monster - Mebbe.

Setmaat writes: “The first picture about books there is one “Brasyl” Ian McDonald, I am not sure if this book is the same story like the movie “Brazil”, it is a retro-scifi-movie

Have you seen this movie? What do you think about the book? and What do you think about the movie?”

Answer: The movie and this recent book are completely different entities. I haven’t read the book yet, but I look forward to doing so. I did see the movie - and hated it.

Mike Moore writes: “I’ve always wondered what the actors, and the production staff, think when they watch the finished episodes of their own product?”

Answer: We always think “Oh, that could’ve been better.” and “I wish I’d done that differently.”

Paula writes: “Y’know, Marty G is going to need to be careful, should he ever get near a con. I think there would be a long line of women waiting to give him a big ol’ smooch for yet another great episode.”

Answer: Ah, Marty G. collects smooches like some people collect coins. Line up early to avoid disappointment!

Inpa writes: “Will the Rodney/Keller thing be revisited or is it official now?”

Answer: Official? All they did was go out for a drink together. Seriously. Applying that logic, given the number of times Carl and I have been out to dinner together, we should be happily married by now.

Caty writes: “When you said that this season is going to be very tight schedule-wise, did you say that because you guys are pushing for a possible July premiere?”

Answer: The decision on the season 5 premiere date rests with SciFi. However, I’m hopeful that fans won’t have to wait until the Fall to see the resolution of our season four cliffhanger.

Thunder writes: “I hope that means Mr. Binder will be flying back up to Vancouver soon.”

Answer: So do we all. Well, most of us. Certainly not those who turned his office into a rec room. Now where’re we going to put the ping pong table?

Mick writes: “. I know that you guys were totally concerned because five or ten online fans were screaming bloody murder about Carter joining the team and how she was going to take over everyone’s positions. She was going to trump Sheppard on military stuff, Mckay on science stuff, etc. Clearly this was the big worry and the thing you guys took to heart all throughout season four.”

Answer: Actually, like numerous fan concerns, the early criticisms of Carter’s involvement in season four were duly noted but in no way influenced the writing of the show. There was never any attempt to pull back on any initially conceived notions of how involved she should have been. As the base commander, we had always envisioned Carter playing a support role, perhaps drawing on her scientific or military expertise when needed but, ultimately, deferring to Sheppard and McKay given their many years of experience in the Pegasus galaxy.

ElisaD writes: “ who thought of the bar trick, because seriously that was brillent and who thought of Rodney’s hand motions when he wanted Sam to flash the boys (just hilarious).”

Answer: Again, Marty G. came up with the bar trick. And I believe the hand motion was a little bit of Hewlett magic.

Elisa D. writes: “So I was wondering if you ever considered writing some short stories for FFN. “

Answer: What is FFN?

February 8, 2008

2008-03-10T14:44:00.000-07:00

Contrary to the opinion of some, I don’t disallow posts to this blog simply because I disagree with their content. A quick glance at the various comments sections will reveal a fairly wide range of opinions on numerous aspects of the show, some positive, some negative. I don’t censor posts because I disagree with them. But I do censor those I find obnoxious, rude, or just plain annoying. Every once in a while, I’ll approve one of the least egregious of the offensive comments because I’ll feel the need to respond and set the record straight. And, as a result, these obnoxious yahoos are occasionally singled out as representative of a certain part of fandom. But the truth is every section and sub-section of fandom has their shining stars, their silent supporters, and their embarrassing cousin Emersons who always show up at the dinner parties without their pants. Take the case of the Torri/Weir fans. You get all kinds and everything in between. At one end of the spectrum, you have that consistently shrill doofus from Virginia whose comments have degenerated from hilarious in their invective meanderings to disappointingly dull and a little sad. And, on the other hand, you have Erika who presents an incredibly eloquent and thoughtful defense of her feelings regarding the Weir character. If you haven’t read Erika’s post yet, I urge you check it out in the February 7th comments section.

Now, given the time Erika put into her post and, quite frankly the timing as well, I thought it best to inform Weir fans of recent developments. Last year, after we shot that final surprise scene in BAMSR, I stopped by Torri’s trailer to congratulate her on a job well done and, also, to assure her that the door was left wide open for Weir‘s possible return (in some form, be it repli-Weir or other) the following season. Torri was excited by the prospect and, in particular, had great things to say about her new leather outfit (props to Val). As season four wrapped, Carl and Paul got to spinning and came up with a terrific storyline that picked up where that last scene of BAMSR left off. We had a story in place for one episode, the starting point of a potentially bigger arc. The script was written and we eventually contacted Torri who, after much consideration, turned down the offer to reprise the role of Elizabeth Weir for the episode. We are, of course, disappointed, but nevertheless respect Torri’s decision and wish her all the best in her future endeavors.

Well, another day, another awesome book shipment. This one from the gang at Pyr. Included in the assortment: Ian MacDonald’s River of Gods and Brasyl (the latter nominated for best scifi novel of 2007 by the British Science Fiction Association), Keeping It Real and Selling Out by UK author Justina Robson who is at the forefront of the hard SF scene, and the prolific Alan Dean Foster’s latest, Sagramanda. Potential book of the month club nominees all.

I found some time during lunch to step out and pick up a few anime dvd’s (pictured above). I’ll definitely be checking out Paprika this weekend. Any anime aficionados out there familiar with any of the other titles? Anything I should immediately jump on?

So, what’s happening with that Fuel dinner? Marty G. and I are in. Are we aiming for April 1st? Or will it be April 3rd? And what time is good for everyone?

Best birthday wishes to mom and Alex Levine, and early best birthday wishes to firefly827347.

Today’s mailbag -

Suekay writes: “Would the actress in mind for Porter happen to be Leela Savasta or am I totally wrong?”

Answer: Porter’s out. Vega’s in. And, yes, Leela Savasta has been cast.

Nigel RAF writes: “What does the Magic Eight Ball say about a Jack O’niell guest spot in season five?”

Magic 8 Ball says: Outlook not so good.

Sally writes: “…speaking of ‘trio’; you said to the fans that as soon as the ep aired, you’d write out the unedited version of the ‘not-so-subtle sj/ship reference’ that ended up on the cutting room floor. will you still do that?”

Answer: Sure, but it will have to wait until Monday when I’m back in the office and can get my hands on the script.

Benny writes: “1. will there be an Ori related episode in season 5 Atlantis?
2. will we see the Tria in season ?
3. Is the brotherhood of Dagan episode gonna be revisited for the missing ZPM in season 5?”

Answers: 1. No. 2. Possibly. 3. Possibly.

Amy Taylor writes: “If I remember right you are watching Lost? What do you think of the new episodes?”

Answer: We stopped watching about a third of the way into season 3. However, Fondy has expressed an interest in catching up, so I picked it up on dvd and am dvr’ing season 4.

AscendedTauri writes: “At this point, how many episodes for Season 5 are set in stone?”

Answer: I’d say we have over half the season mapped out.

Alli Snow writes: “Re: Comic Con, make sure you swing by the Mile High Comics table and say hi to Lisa, our official SJHW representative.”

Answer: Will do!

Remus123 writes: “Since the Porter idea got the axe, will the new character/actress follow along the same lines as what had been originally intended for Porter(i.e. new addition to military contingent and participating in “Search and Rescue”) or will she make a later debut?”

Answer: The character in Search and Rescue has been changed to Captain Alicia Vega. Now DOCTOR Allison Porter will be making her debut in Whispers.

Flyingdog147 writes: “Did you ever get a chance to read Good Omens?”

Answer: I didn’t. It’s still on my To-Read list.

Pam writes: “One thing I have noticed at both Stargate & Star Trek conventions is that other actors (and others associated with the shows) are always full of praise for the attitude of both Amanda Tapping and Robert Picardo to their work: knowing their lines, being on time, respect for other actors, etc. Is this one of the factors that led to both being on the shortlist for the position of base commander in the run up to Season 4?”

Answer: Fans can say what they like about their respective characters but, on a personal level, you’ll be hard-pressed to find two more hard-working and pleasant individuals. In an industry where productions are often saddled with jerks and self-centered whiners, actors like these two are a delight to work with.

Kamilla writes: “Why was Rachel not happy?”

Answer: I never implied she wasn’t happy. Quite the opposite in fact. I said she was very happy with some of the early creative decisions we’ve made regarding her character.

Heightmeyer’s Lemming writes: “What happened to the militarization of Atlantis which seemed so hellbend in season 4?”

Answer: Tune into season 5 and find out.

Marla writes: “Joe F. had done two episodes of Women’s Murder Club while on hiatus. Once the writer’s strike gets settled, will Joe be able to continue his role on there, since you guys will be in production by then?”

Answer: Once production begins, Joe will be very busy on Atlantis. This season is going to be very tight schedule-wise.

RG25 writes: “Have the writers ever scrapped a story idea early on because it seemed like it’d be too expensive, daunting, or too much of a hassle to do?”

Answer: We came very close to scrapping Midway when it looked like it was going to be too expensive to produce - but ultimately found a way to make it happen. Good thing too. It’s an excellent episode.

Elisa writes: “I was curious about something. Since you average over a hundred comments on your blog, do you really read them all or do you randomly just pick and choose which ones to read and answer?”

Answer: I read every comment prior to approving them, then pick whichever comments/questions interest me for the mailbag.

Wolfenm writes: “Do you just not want to go to Dragon?”

Answer: No, I’d love to go. Unfortunately, it falls smack-dab in the middle of production and while the actors may be able to get away for the weekend, I’ll no doubt be hammering away at a script while the event is taking place.

Kdvb1 writes: “Is April 1st a typo or are you playing an early April Fools joke on us?”

Answer: I wasn’t the one who suggested the April 1st date. And, no, I’m not joking.

Kdvb1 also writes: “Who is older, John or Dave Sheppard?”

Answer: I imagined John being the big brother.

Jen writes: “Just started watching Trio and I’ve got to ask… was Rodney’s comment about Shape magazine compliments of an adlib or the writers?”

Answer: That was pure Marty G.

Taz writes: “I thought Ronon and Keller were dating since Quarantine.”

Answer: There has been no development on the Ronon-Keller front since the events of Quarantine. She’s still single.

February 7, 2008

2008-03-10T14:43:00.000-07:00

Hey, look at what arrived in the mail today. Books - and lots of ‘em. In addition to my shipment from amazon.com, I also received a couple of titles from D. Rose, and a few more from Sulien. AND a chocolate assortment compliments of Amy Lynn. Thanks to everyone. Sulien, if you remember to remind me, I’ll make the Butcher book one of the nominees in our next fantasy BOTM vote. D., I have to admit to date I’ve started two Turtledove books I never got around to finishing. Hopefully, third time’s the charm. Amy - the Spicy Maya was a pleasant surprise, but that Noir au Grue de Cacao rocks! The hot sauces were great as well.

Another reminder that this month’s book of the month discussions will commence on February 18th when we will kick things off with the scifi selection, Fast Forward 1: Future Fiction from the Cutting Edge. Editor Lou Anders has kindly agreed to swing on by and field our questions so, as my old grade two teacher Mrs. Vowels (I shit you not) used to say: “Put your thinking caps on!”. We’ll follow the next week with Neil Gaiman’s Smoke and Mirrors which I just started last night and was unable to put down until way past my bedtime. I’m a little over halfway through and should finish up tonight.

As I mentioned yesterday, prep is finally underway on episode #1, Search and Rescue. Construction has already started in the VFX stage, and the baby pictures are making the rounds. We’ve pulled the trigger on Porter - who may well be in for yet another name change - casting an actress who had a blink-and-you’ll-miss-her part back in season 3’s Tao of Rodney but did a bang-up job and caught our attention. “We should bring that actress back,”I suggested at the time. And now we have. Rachel dropped by the production offices and we had a little chat about what’s in store for Teyla this year. She was not only happy but, admittedly, quite relieved with the creative route we’re taking.

To those of you asking about the Fan Fuel dinner - the only reason I’m reluctant to organize the event is because the restaurant is fairly upscale and may well be out of the price range of many fans. That said, if there are some of you who do have your hearts set on dining there the night of April 1st, then I’m sure Marty G. and I could make ourselves available.

Today’s pics: Books and chocolates and behind-the-scenes pics from this Friday night’s episode, Midway. For more behind-the-scenes pic, follow the link -

http://josephmallozzi.blogspot.com/2007/08/august-26-2007.html

Today’s video: At Fondy’s request, I’ve uploaded yet another vid of Lulu in action. Either scroll down or click on the link -

http://s230.photobucket.com/albums/ee164/BaronDestructo/?action=view¤t=SnowLulu3.flv

Today’s blog is dedicated to RachelCooper and birthday boy bugguy.

Today’s mailbag -

Jon K. writes: “Any Chance we will be seeing the Travelers in season 5, most notably Larrin?”

Answer: Yep.

NCC-72452 writes: “When you say “story in place” regarding Weir, does this mean 1 episode? 2.71828 episodes? 3.14159 episodes? Also, did Robert Picardo and Jewel Staite’s relative star power in the world of sci-fi influence your decision to bring them on?”

Answers: Story in place refers to 1 episode. While their crossover appeal is nice, the reason Bob and Jewel are on the show is because they are immensely talented individuals.

Flyingdog147 writes: “ Is there a difference between “Special Guest Star” and “Special Guest”?”

Answer: Nope.

Elizabeth writes: “Have you ever seen the Disney movie Atlantis: The Lost Empire?”

Answer: I haven’t.

Enzo Aquarius writes: “Very random question, do you like funnel cake?”

Answer: I don’t know. If I had to guess, I’d say - yes.

Sarah writes: “My husband did not like the original Battlestar Galactica series, he says it annoyed him. Do you think he would like the new series? Would you recommend any other scifi series for him?”

Answer: I have no idea what your husband would like so I’m reluctant to make any recommendations. Although I haven’t watched the new BSG, I’ve heard good things about it. Be warned though. It’s apparently very grim. I watched Farscape with Fondy and we both found it fun and very inventive. Of course, your enjoyment may depend on your willingness to embrace its various puppet characters. I was a little leery at first but, about six shows in, one of the puppets - Rygel - became my favorite character.

Narellefromaus writes: “How’s the state of the house with Fondy away?”

Answer: It’s actually a little tidier now as I’ve been able to put the extra free time toward filing and general organizing. This weekend, I plan to shampoo the rug and sort the recycling. If I have time, I may even take down the Christmas tree.

Rachel writes: “Todd is my best friend’s absolute favorite character (he’s a close second to McKay for me); will we be seeing him again at all in Season 5?”

Answer: Yes, Todd will be making an appearance in season 5.

Breeze writes: “Have you guys started think about SGA 100th episode?”

Answer: We have an idea.

Susanthetartanturtle writes: “Any chance that you will be at Dragon.con this year?”

Answer: Alas, no. But I will be hitting Comic Con in July.

Jean writes: “ Happy Chinese New Year! Here are some interesting if extraneous tidbits about the Chinese Lunar Cycle…”

Answer: Very cool. I’m going to have to share these with Fondy. She’s a tiger.

Thefamousseccles writes: “If all five episodes have been written, and a sixth brilliant idea comes up, is there any possibility of more than five Beckett episodes?”

Answer: Of course.

Emily writes: “My favorite was when I was shopping in the shoe department at Macy’s wearing clothing that in no way resembled a uniform of any kind and had a purse, etc. A lady came up to me and rudely asked me to get her a particular size of the shoe she was holding. She then got all pissed off when I told her I didn’t work there. That was weird.”

Answer: And there was the time I was hanging around the appliance section of my local department store when a middle-aged woman walked up to me and asked about a certain washing machine. I told her I couldn’t help her because I didn’t work there. She walked off, muttering “Then what are you doing standing there?” I wanted to reply “Waiting for my wife, ma‘am.” but she was already gone.

Yazid writes: “Why take Dr Keller in Sheppard’s team and not Major Lorne?”

Answer: There are no plans to put Dr. Keller on Sheppard’s team.

CheekylilDevil writes: “Okay Mr M, would you say the chances of bringing back Kolya are slim to none, or better with bribery?”

Answer: As I’ve often said - This is scifi. Anything is possible.

Dovil writes: “How does it feel to commit television genocide? Washing the nonexistant blood of fictional people from your hands? Hearing the silent screams of those that don’t exist as they are written out of existance?”

Answer: It feels alright I guess. Paul was the one who noticed as we were reviewing season 4 - Holy crap, we killed a lot of people last season! I think we broke the standing record and it’s going to be very hard to beat it this year. But we’ll give it our best shot.

Dovil also writes: “ How do you live with yourself making choices that I might not agree with? Did you not once think to consult me? Did you think for some delusional reason that your creative decisions might hold more weight than mine do?”

Answer: Actually, I had intended to get you to sign off on the creative decisions, but I think I only have your old email address and by the time I got around to realizing it was, unfortunately, too late. There is still, however, time to choose a cake for the big Zelenka birthday episode. So, what’ll it be? Sacher Torte or Black Forest?

Dovil also writes: “After all at the end of the day you’re just the Executive Producer and writer for the show, I on the other hand spend 45 minutes a week slumped on the couch with a bag of potato chips watching this. If anyone knows how to run things around here, it’s me.”

Answer: Point taken. While we’re at it, there are a couple of people working on the show who are on the bubble (ie. Antonio the potlight wrangler’s drive and determination have waned over the course of last season. And I know you’ve already gone on record as expressing some displeasure with his insistence on wearing those clunky, lurid blue plastic sandals.). I’m sending the names your way. Just weigh in with a yay or nay. You sure you don’t write comedy?

Asmoothlie writes: “Also, based on the beginning of BAMSR, is it correct to say that there are still nanite particles floating around in space from the attacks Caldwell and Ellis made, waiting to be re-activated?”

Answer: No, that is incorrect.

February 6, 2008

2008-02-07T11:54:00.001-08:00

With prep finally underway for the show’s fifth season, my focus has shifted from this blog to the production. That said, I’m well aware that many of you check in here on a regular basis fully expecting a daily entry. Well, rather than disappoint anyone, it’s at times like these when I call on my friends to help pick up the slack. In this case, Cookie Monster and Baron Destruto who have been kind enough to drop in today and offer some dvd and movie reviews. But be warned - spoilers abound!

SNAKES ON A PLANE

Reviewed by Cookie Monster

Snakes on a Plane be good, old-fashioned fun popcorn movie. Minus fun. And not very good. Or old-fashioned. Also, no popcorn. Still, for movie dat make hardly any sense, it move along at brisk pace. What little story dere is about guy who taking flight from Hawaii to Los Anjelees to testify against mobster. But mobster find easy way to keep him from to testify. He put crateful of crazy poisonous snakes on plane! So simple, Cookie Monster surprised we don’t see dis happen more often. Airport security always checking shoes, but never checking innocent-looking crate of snakes. Something to tink about.

Anyway, halfway through flight door on snake crate blow open. At dis point, Cookie Monster tink “Hey, wait minute. If able to sneak bomb on board for to blow up crate door, why not just sneak bigger bomb on board for to blow up plane?” But Cookie Monster not film producer, so not have answer. Snakes get loose. Lots of people get bited. Some unlucky and die right away. Some lucky (aka - bigger stars) and hang around for a while. Snakes not only angry, but very spiteful. Sometimes bite, sometimes climb into people’s eyes and mouths, sometimes slither by in foreground of shot and wink at camera. People in business class more lucky because no snakes upstairs in deir section, but not so lucky later when riffraff finally reckon dey be better off not flying coach. Figuring dat out easy part. Figuring out how to climb stairs much, much harder. Staircase collapse and everyone fall down onto waiting snakes, making great case for why some people not cut out for first class travel. Luckily, FBI agent Samuel L. Jackson on board and he get in touch with “hardcore” snake expert played by actor who either make decision to play character sleepy-drunk or not bother to learn lines so look like he read dem off back of car headrest. Expert get anti-venom ready. Sam tell everyone to buckle up, den shoot out window. Plane decompress and snakes all sucked out (and presoomably land on unlucky picnickers and sunbathers). Sammy J. land plane. Phew! Nightmare over. Or is it? No because now dey make Snakes on a Train.

NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN

Reviewed by Baron Destructo

Has anyone else happened to notice the growing divide between critics and the general movie-going public? While the great unwashed make box office hits of the likes of Meet the Spartans and Enchanted, movie critics are heaping praise on cryptic and increasingly inaccessible films like There Will Be Blood and Michael Clayton. What has caused this increasingly widening rift? Is the general movie-going public really that much stupider than they were, oh, ten years ago? Baron Destructo would argue yes, yes they are. On the other hand, have the endless movie-watching demands of their jobs rendered critics so jaded and cynical that they’ll laud any movie for the mere act of breaking established filmic convention? Again, Baron Destructo would argue yes, yes they have.

No Country for Old Men is a brilliant three-quarters of a movie. Beautifully shot and wonderfully acted, it had me and the rest of the League of Aliens and Mutants for Evil on the edge of our Corinthian leather recliners. Javier Bardem’s portrayal of the dispassionately ruthless killer Anton Chigurh is chilling and more than a little reminiscent of a young Count Sinister. Yet, for some reason, the film ultimately eschews its taut, suspenseful narrative to - a) kill off the protagonist off-screen, and b) continue along matter-of-factly some twenty minutes past it’s dramatically satisfying conclusion. The Baron would argue that there is a good reason the three-act structure has become so entrenched as a way of telling a story on the big screen. BECAUSE IT WORKS! While the Baron won’t go so far as to say it’s a hard and fast rule that should never be broken, he will argue that there should be a good reason for doing so. And the breaking of tradition for the simple sake of being different is not so much a statement as it is an affected FU to the audience.

Of course, like most associations, the League of Aliens and Mutants for Evil boasts its fair share of pseudo-intellecti and preening cognoscenti, and they have been quick to disagree with the Baron…

“But the Josh Brolin character wasn’t the protagonist,”argues the Malevolater. “The Sheriff played by Tommy Lee Jones shares in this role, so the decision to dispatch of Josh’s character off-screen and about a half an hour before the final credits is a sound one.”

- “Your cervo implants must be messing up your synaptic plasticity,”the Baron counters. “A film’s protagonist is it’s hero, the character driving the action. The Tommy Lee Jones character, on the other hand, was a passive entity, a commentator/philosopher more akin to Ancient Greek drama’s Chorus. To suggest otherwise is ridiculous.”

“But that’s the way it happened in the book!”argues the Malevolater.

- “So what?”is the Baron’s response. “Perhaps the most important aspect of adapting a book to the big screen is in translating the written word to the visual medium, giving the source material life within the filmic framework. The book and the movie are separate entities and should be appreciated as such. ”

In the end, the Baron doesn’t mind the odd artistic peculiarities. In truth, he has attended more of Glaxnor the Miscreant’s performance art shows than he would care to admit to. But, again, it must make sense within the framework of the movie. Take the Sheriff’s post-shooting visit to the motel room. He stands outside, anxious, perhaps a little fearful. We cut inside to reveal the Chigurh character inside, seemingly waiting for him. Eventually, the Sheriff heads inside and - Chigurh is not there. What happened? Did he dislocate his skeletal structure and slip out through the air conditioning vent like the Purple Lamprey escaping the clutches of Justice Incorporated as Princess Arcana suggested? No. According to the actor who played Chigurh, his character was never in the room. “It was a manifestation of the Sheriff’s fear,”explained the Malevolater. To which the Baron counters: “Is your adreno-serum screwing with your basal ganglia? How the hell can he possibly imagine someone he has never met before?”

What made this experience so frustrating for the Baron was the fact that No Country for Old Men IS a truly great movie up to a certain point, and then it seemingly ceases to care - about its characters, its audience, and what has come before. The Baron is reminded of the incredibly unsatisfying conclusion to The Sopranos and how faux wunderkinds tripped all over one another to celebrate its out-of-the-box finale, meticulously deciphering supposed clues in the narrative - hidden symbols, turns of the phrase - that, in their minds, presented irrefutable evidence that Tony Sopranos had been killed off at series’ end. Painstakingly conceived theories that were, in the end, completely upended when show creator/finale writer David Chase revealed that - No, Tony Sopranos was, in fact, not dead.

Fie! The Baron yearns for the day when the broad chasm between the cinema dilettante and the masses of mouth-breathers is finally bridged. When we can all unite in our adoration of movies like Braveheart and The Silence of the Lambs. When he can spend a peaceful movie night with his fellow megalomaniacal mates without having to resort to his fire gauntlets to get the Malevolater to shut the hell up! Is it really so much to ask?

Today’s entry is dedicated to Rachel and our friends in the Southern U.S.

Today’s mailbag -

Narellefromaus writes: “I’ve decided to read another Iain Banks novel. You recommend both The Player of Games and Use of Weapons. Do you have a preference of one over the other?”

Answer: They’re both excellent - but I would lean toward Player of Games.

Thornyrose writes: “You’ve indicated McGillion is onboard for 5 episodes. Do you already have outlines for those stories, or are you planning to write the scripts now that you know you have the character?”

Answer: One of Beckett’s appearances has already been scripted. Another two have been outlined and about to be written. And, at this point, we have a vague idea for two more.

Karen writes: “Can you reassure us that Zelenka will be back?”

Answer: Yes, rest assured Zelenka will be back for the show‘s fifth season. As will Lorne.

JoJoB writes: “Oh, and another point about Keller, not everyone who skips grades and graduates early has a miserable childhood. I skipped two grades and graduated high school at 16 1/2. I had no “fitting in” problems. I went to dances, to my prom, was in the marching band, the chorus, played sports and was a normal high schooler. The only problem I had was that I was the only senior who had to take the bus to school since the driving age in New Jersey is 17. I had to live on campus my freshman year of college since I still wasn’t old enough to drive. My experiences didn’t ostracize me. I married my college sweetheart, we have a beautiful daughter and just celebrated our 18th wedding anniversary. I have a successful career, too.”

Answer: Congratulations to you. However, I’m sure it’s remotely possible that others have had very different experiences.

Kate writes: “Only letting through the good stuff, hey Joe?”

Answer: Actually, if you’d bothered to read through the preceding comments, you would have noticed there’s a good mix of opinion here. I just have zero tolerance for obnoxious posters. But I’ll make an exception in your case.

Kate also writes: “…you got rid of Elizabeth because she wasn’t leadership material because Atlantis was at war, right, and you needed someone military.”

Answer: I believe you’re confusing the behind-the-scenes decision on the character and the ensuing in-show explanation for the change.

Kate also writes: “You may as well rename the show “Stargate: Crybabies”.”

Answer: I think that would be a far more appropriate title for your comment.

Kate also writes: “The decisons to get rid of Beckett and Weir, the decisions to switch to Carter and Keller, and now the decision to bring in Woolsey as a leader — […] — will go down in scifi history as some of the dumbest things ever done.”

Answer: I don’t know. It’s gonna be tough to up-end those ewoks from the top spot.

Kate also writes: “You need your head read.”

Answer: You mean like phrenology? Please. I don’t buy into that antiquated mumbo jumbo, preferring instead the far more grounded practices of galvanism and moxibustion.

Kate also writes: “If you haven’t even spoken to Torri, or decided how many episodes you want her for, isn’t it a little presumptuous to be telling fans she’ll be back?”

Answer: Not necessarily.

Ascended Tauri writes: “Will we see the Wraith worshiper that escaped at the end of ‘Reunion’ return this season, or in Season 5?”

Answer: We’ll be seeing Tyre (played by Mark Dacascos) in season 5’s Broken Ties.

Jenn writes: “ Will the focus of the show still be on the team (i.e. Sheppard, Teyla, Ronon and McKay) in season 5?”

Answer: Yes, both as a team and as individuals.

Kamilla writes: “I was wondering who wrote these last episodes of season four?”

Answer: Midway - Carl Binder, Trio - Martin Gero, Kindred I - Joseph Mallozzi, Kindred II - Alan McCullough, The Last Man - Paul Mullie.

Fargate writes: “Do you consider Mrs Claudia Black to play Porter’s character?”

Answer: Nope.

Khyrra writes: “In regards to Sheppard knowing McKay’s password in “Quarantine”: did we ever actually see Rodney tell John the code? It seems like I remember such a scene, but no one on the SciFi Channel board can find it(several of us have been scanning transcripts). Are we all crazy, or did it happen offscreen?”

Answer: I’m sorry to say that, yes, you are crazy.

Ernie writes: “I have a question as I was watching some of SG-1 Seasons. I noticed a lot of the episodes are labeled with the actors as Executive Producers or writers. Like RDA as Executive Producer and Christopher Judge as writer. Is this something that the actors wanted to do to help their career or something fun for them?”

Answer: Rick started on the show as an executive producer. As for Chris, he always expressed an interest in writing an episode and eventually did - The Changeling. He went on to write several more and is presently shopping a pilot he wrote - Rage of Angels. I think writing is definitely something Chris enjoys, although I think you’d have to ask him for the details.

February 5, 2008

2008-02-07T11:53:00.000-08:00

In case you hadn’t noticed, that long-awaited Atlantis season 5 press release finally came out today (check it out here: http://www.scifi.com/scifiwire/index.php?category=2&id=48051)

For those of you who just got back from the moon and may have missed it, here are the salient points -

1. Woolsey assumes command of the Atlantis expedition!

I’ve always admired Robert Picardo’s work in shows like China Beach and Star Trek: Voyager and we had been looking to cast him for a long time. Finally, the opportunity presented itself in SG-1’s Heroes I and II in which he played the button-down Trust attorney Richard Woolsey. He was a fun, albeit not all-that-likable character, and it wasn’t until his next appearance, in the episode Inauguration, that we caught a glimpse of the man beneath the officious façade. Despite being innately hard-nosed and by-the-book, Woolsey redeems himself at episode’s end by allowing his own moral compass to guide him rather than blindly follow the directions of his scheming employer, Vice President Kinsey. In ensuing appearances (Prototype, The Scourge, Return I and II, and the Seer), he proved himself at times obtrusive, fastidious, and, yes, a pain-in-the-ass, but also loyal, intelligent, and above all, principled.

Way back at the end of season three when we were considering a new commander, Woolsey was one of the first names that popped into my head. I thought he would be a great choice - an established player in the Stargate universe and an interesting character that could offer much in the way of potential conflict. It also didn’t hurt that Bob is a nice guy, and a wonderful actor who has hit it out of the park every time he’s appeared on the show. After much discussion though, it was decided at the time that Carter would be a better fit. And we had a great season with her. But with Amanda having made the difficult decision to commit herself to another project, the opportunity to bring in Woolsey presented itself once again. And, this time, we took it.

Of course, his appointment does beg certain questions, the chiefest being: If Carter was appointed commander of the Atlantis expedition as a military response to the ongoing replicator and wraith threat, what has changed between then and now? Good question. Tune into season 5 to find out.

2. The beloved Dr. Carson Beckett returns for five episodes!

It’s impossible to write “Dr. Carson Beckett” without using the term “beloved” I’ve noticed. Anyway, yes, it’s true, Paul McGillion will be back with us for 5 episodes. It was great having him back on set in season 4 and we all look forward to seeing significantly more of him this year. “How is this possible?”you ask. “I thought he was dead!”you say. Hey, now that you mention it, he WAS dead! How does that work? Well, tune in to the last few episode of season 4 to find out.

3. Daniel Jackson will be guesting in some episodes.

So far, we’ve got a terrific, BIG two-parter planned. I suspect that the page count in the Daniel/McKay scenes (featuring the two fastest-talking actors in show business) will have the scheduling gurus doing back-flips. Remember that new enemy I mentioned? Oh, and Marty G. will be doing the honors on this one.

4. Samantha Carter will appear in several episodes.

Given Amanda’s upcoming commitment, it’s impossible to offer an exact number of episodes. As I said, it really has everything to do with a) her schedule and b) the types of stories we come up with. However, I can say that, at present, we do have her locked in for two.

5. No mention of the Weir character

I’ve already stated our intention to pay off the storyline we hinted at in Be All My Sins Remember’d. We have the story in place and, once a deal is closed, you’ll be the first to hear about it.

For those of you asking about which line in the teaser poem refers to Outcast:

“Wallace’s research a menace let loose.”

Today’s blog is dedicated to birthday boyorgirl Konman72 and Sara who sent Lulu a practical yet fashionable E-Collar.

Let’s tackle the mailbag -

Aquarian writes: “ Is the Michael storyline going to be revisited at all in S5?”

Answer: Although we’ve yet to slot a story (or two) into the schedule, you can be sure we’ll see him pop up at some point in season 5.

PG-15 writes: “Was Bill Dow really sunburned, or was all of that makeup just to set up the joke that Dr. Lee got called in from vacation?”

Answer: No, he wasn’t really sunburned. That was scripted.

RaeveAva writes: “Where did you and the rest of the SGA writers, get your sense of humors?”

Answer: We were born with them. Except in the case of Marty G. His was genetically engineered.

Thornyrose writes: “When the decision was made to cast Hewlett, was there a lot of revising of scripts early on?”

Answer: Definitely. The McKay character is very different from the character Brad and Rob originally envisioned for the role.

MaryA writes: “I was wondering if you would be so willing as to confirm or deny Acastas Kolya’s reappearance in Season 5?”

Answer: Funny you should mention Kolya. I had a conversation with Robert Davi last week (coincidentally, a day after I spoke to Richard Kind, aka Lucius, concerning a chocolate article he came across recently). Although there are no stories in the works for either character - hey, this is scifi. Anything is possible.

Maren Sievert writes: “ I’ve herad that dogs like yours are prone to have breathing problem because of the way the nose is. Can you confirm that?

Answer: Confirmed. Jelly is particularly bad. She even snores when she’s awake.

Iamza writes: “have you read Susannah Clarke’s Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell yet?”

Answer: It’s sitting on my bookshelf. I’ll get around to it - eventually.

Marko writes: “I’m glad that he’s going to remain the team leader, but as for there being no discussion about promoting him… why on earth not? Carter made lieutenant colonel one year before he did; wouldn’t it then make sense for him to be promoted to full colonel one year after her, that is, in season 5?”

Answer: It would make sense if it was simply a matter of putting in the hours but, in fact, merit has a lot to do with it. Does Sheppard deserve to be made full bird Colonel? I guess you’d have to argue your case to the promotions selection committee.

Grace writes: “ You can say that Michael Shanks will ‘guest star’ in several episodes, but you can’t give the same statement for Torri.”

Answer: Yep, that’s about it. Michael Shanks will be in two episodes. So far.

Mark B writes: “Can you confirm if Jewel Staite will be regular or recurring next season?”

Answer: Jewel will be a regular next year.

Lea writes: “Woolsey’s so incredibly annoying…”

Answer: So was Dr. Rodney McKay the first time we met him in Redemption I and II.

Inpa writes: “The mysterious character Porter, was an announcement about her *not* included because the actress hasn’t been decided, because she won’t be *significant enough* in the show, or some other reason?”

Answer: She has yet to be cast and we have yet to see how significant a role she will play in season 5.

Inpa also writes: “Also how was the decision to bring Woolsey over made, I know the writers have said it was considered when thinking who would be in charge for season 4. Was it a quick obvious decision or did it require a lot of thought?”

Answer: It took us approximately three seconds.

Emily writes: “I finished reading Bright of the Sky. I was a little concerned about it since it kind of straddled the line between sci-fi and fantasy (imo) and I’m not a huge fan of fantasy, but overall I thought it was a good read. My least favorite storyline was actually Quinn’s…”

Answer: Funny you should say that. I was all onboard with the Quinn storyline until the narrative shifted to Sydney. At that point, Quinn’s quest became secondary to the far more interesting, character-driven Sydney storyline. Although there were interesting elements in Quinn’s drive to rescue his daughter, I found myself thoroughly engrossed in Sydney’s plight.

Farscapefan writes: “what the hell are you thinking sending Daniel to Atlantis WITHOUT Vala? You know very well that these two are totally incomplete without another around! And I swear, I’m gonna hate you forever if you make Daniel act like Vala doesn’t exist at all and there won’t be at least one mention of her.”

Answer: Done and done. I’ll cross you off my Christmas card list.

Mrs.B108 writes: “Will Season Five introduce new enemies alongside its new Atlantis personnel?”

Answer: Yep.

Amyfo writes: “Joe look what I found, I think you’ll enjoy this.
http://www.linein.org/media/screenclean.swf”

Answer: Yeah, that’s how I keep my monitors clean. Jelly can’t get enough.

February 4, 2008

2008-02-07T11:52:00.000-08:00

Last night, the transformation was almost completed. A Boston team came very close to becoming that which it has historially despised: the New York Yankees. But as it turned out, it was all for naught. I know, I know. Oh, ye of little faith. Cookie Monster was gloating all night. Despite my pessimism, those Giants came through. I couldn’t have asked for a better game. Or a better outcome. To go undefeated in the regular season, make it all the way to the Superbowl - and lose. How sweet it is! Probably the only ones happier than me, Cookie Monster, and fans of the New York Giants were the 1972 undefeated Miami Dolphins team. Oh, and my sister who doesn’t know anything about football and called me yesterday afternoon on her way to a Superbowl party. “Who should I bet on and what should I say to make it sound like I know what I’m talking about?“ “Bet on the Giants,“I advised. “And say they have the better pass rush.“ She ended up winning $60 in the party pick’em pool.

GREATEST. SUPERBOWL. EVER!

Also, a handful of great commercials. My Top 5 faves:

5. Bud Light - Ability to Fly

4. Bridgestone - Squirrel

3. Tide - Screaming Stain

2. Doritos - Mouse Trap

1. Doritos - Mouse Trap!!!

Check ‘em out here: http://sports.aol.com/nfl/superbowlads

The results are in for the next book of the month club discussions.

In the scifi category, it’ll be Timescape by Gregory Benford. Discussion will begin April 7th.

In the horror category, F. Paul Wilson’s The Keep gets the nod. Discussion on this book will begin April 14th.

Finally, in the fantasy category, Jeffrey Ford’s Empire of Ice Cream wins a hard-fought battle. Discussion on this book will begin April 21st.

Hopefully, that will give everyone plenty of time to read the selection(s) of their choice. Between now and then, I nevertheless intend to read the nominees that didn’t make the cut (Joe Hill’s Heart-Shaped Box, Neal Stephenson’s The Diamond Age, and Patrick Rothfuss’s The Name of the Wind) and invite you to join me and weigh in with your comments.

Perusing the fan forums this past weekend, I noticed a significant amount of anxious speculation concerning the show’s fifth season. Some of the more outlandish assumptions seem to stem from a SliceofSciFi article that refers to various rumors surrounding Atlantis’s fifth season. Allow me to put some of those rumors to rest. According to the article:

“With the absence of Carter, Sheppard (Joe Flanigan) will pick up more leadership responsibilities. Rumor has it he may even be in for a promotion to Full Bird Colonel, however, nothing along those lines has been confirmed.”

There has never been any discussion about promoting Sheppard and his leadership responsibilities as team leader will remain unchanged.

“We may also be seeing a little less of Rachel Luttrell as Teyla, at least in the early goings of the new season. As every fan of the series knows Rachel spent most of Season 4 being pregnant for real. By the time Season 5 airs she will have delivered her baby and will be spending some quality time with her new addition to the family. She is expected to return in full capacity later in the season, however.”

Rachel remains a series regular and an important part of the team. Two of the first three episodes see some major developments for the character.

“There will be an addition to the Atlantis SG Team named Captain Alison Parker. She is military, tough and ready for action, but frustrated over Colonel Carter’s slowness in making her a permanent part of the team. That will change quickly after the first episode.”

The character’s name is Porter, not Parker, and there are no plans to put her on Sheppard’s team. So, to spell it out for everyone - Porter has NOT been brought in to replace Teyla on the team.

“One of sci-fi fans favorite actresses, Kari Wuhrer (”Sliders”) appeared in Season 4 in the episode “Outcast” (air date Feb. 1, 2008) as Homeland Security agent Nancy Sheppard (Lt. Col. John Sheppard’s ex-wife). It has been rumored that she may be back for a few episodes next season as well.”

Kari is a wonderful actress and we like the character a lot, but there are at present no plans to bring her back. That’s not to say it won’t happen - just not anytime soon.

“Michael, everybody’s favorite Wraith (Connor Trinnear of “Star Trek: Enterprise”), will have a very significant storyline in Season 5,”

A very significant storyline? That’s news to us in the writing department.

“The show will also get to see a lot more from recurring characters like Major Evan Lorne (Kavan Smith) and Dr. Katie Brown (Brenda James), Rodney McKay’s (David Hewlett) love interest.”

Half points on this one.

I’m posting early today to tell everyone to go back to bed. Apparently, Scifi has pushed the press release to tomorrow. Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Today’s entry is dedicated marielabbott who sent us two boxes of Midwestern chocolates and Giants wide receiver David Tyree who made the catch that sunk the Pats.

Today’s pics: Dogs and chocolate. Always a dangerous mix!

February 3, 2008

2008-02-03T17:35:00.001-08:00

Just a quick reminder that the voting for the next book of the month club selections ends at midnight tonight. So if you haven’t weighed in yet and are planning to take part in the discussions, pick a book - or two - or three. The nominees -

In the scifi category, it’s Gregory Benford’s Timescape vs. Neal Stephenson’s The Diamond Age: Or, A Young Lady’s Illustrated Primer.

In the fantasy category, it’s Jeffrey Ford’s The Empire of Ice Cream vs. Patrick Rothfuss’s The Name of the Wind: The King-Killer Chronicle, Day 1.

In the horror category, it’s Joe Hill’s Heart-Shaped Box vs. F. Paul Wilson’s The Keep.

To those of you looking for a little information on the afore-mentioned titles, check out my January 30th, 2008 post -

http://josephmallozzi.wordpress.com/2008/01/30/january-30-2008-and-the-big-news-iscoming-soon-plus-botm-nominees/

Well, it’s Superbowl Sunday and, unlike past seasons, this year I’m not all that interested in the big game. As much as I’d love to see the Giants pull the upset, and with all due respect to Cookie Monster, I think it’s highly unlikely. I expect it’ll be a yawner of a game. At around nine p.m. PST, New England will celebrate an undefeated season while every football fan outside of Boston moves on to far more interesting things like, oh, getting an early jump on sorting my wife’s mail prior to her March return. I’ll probably tune in for the first quarter and, provided the Patriots (or the refs - anyone remember the Seahawks getting jobbed in their last Superbowl appearance?) haven’t salted it away by then, may stick it out to half-time. I remember Paul telling me that when he was in Thailand many years ago, he and some friends stopped by a bar to catch the Superbowl. As the game progressed, every North American in the bar was glued to the t.v. while the locals chatted noisily amongst themselves, oblivious to the big game. When the game hit half-time, however, the North Americans kicked back and began to yak - while a reverent hush fell over the locals entranced by the half-time show. Well, I think this is one year that the Thai have it right.

Oh, and while I’m on the subject, here are the top three things someone can say in the weeks leading up to the Superbowl that will earn them a mid-knuckle crack to the forehead compliments of yours truly:

1. “I don’t care who wins, just so long as it’s a good game.”

2. “Football is for morons.” followed by - “Hey, did you watch last night’s Celebrity Apprentice?”

3. “I don’t follow football. But I’m rooting for the Patriots.”

Today’s video: Another behind-the-scenes vid of the replicator plunge. Scroll down or click on the link -

http://s230.photobucket.com/albums/ee164/BaronDestructo/?action=view¤t=ReplicatorplungeB.flv

February 2, 2008

2008-02-03T17:34:00.000-08:00

With the Superbowl only a day away, I temporarily turn this blog over to its resident football experts, Baron Destructo and Cookie Monster, for their peerless predictions on the big game.

MATCH-UP: NEW YORK GIANTS VS NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS

(New England favored by 12)

Cookie Monster: On Sesame Street, only ting bigger den “Superbowl Sunday” be “Shave Snuffleupagus Saturday“. Both big annual events offer thrill of victory and agony of de feet (Smell of Snuffy furry clodhoppers indescrybabble. But Cookie Monster try anyway. You ever have when cleaning out fridge, find what Oscar the Grouch call Civil War cheese? All blue and grey? But you eat anyway and half hour later get sick and going to vomit - but don’t have time to reach toilet so use first ting handy and dat be four year old athletic sock dat fall between washer and dryer day after Cookie Monster run Boston Marathon but beaten by Grover who cheat and take rickshaw to finish line instead? And garbage day still tree days away so have to sneak out in middle of night and slip sock in crazy cat lady neighbor garbage can instead? But when pass by house, Mrs. Epstein spot Cookie Monster and invite him inside where she live with seventy-five indoor cats with no litter box because house BE giant litter box and Mrs. Epstein always keep windows closed to conserve heat even in summer time when dis always happen? And she disappear into kitchen and leave Cookie Monster in sealed hot room with seventy-five cats and four year old athletic sock holding gut scrub Civil War cheese? And den she come out and serve her grandma’s special pumpkin pie? Well, Snuffy feet smell exactly like dat pie. Sweet with just hint of cinamon. Feet smell terrific! But very painful when step on you.) Every year, Grover host big superbowl party. He buy big screen t.v. (and return it next day) and have good old fashioned burgers, hot dogs, and triple sec. Always fun except last year when Teletubbies crash. More like Terrotubbies, chaah! Little mofos lock themselves in Grover tatami room and smoke crystal meth. We kick dem out, but not before one use fruit bowl for toilet. Leave dump bigger den Tinky Winky head! We all very angry, very disgusted and very, very impressed.

Anyhoo, tomorrow de big game. Patriots favorites, undefeeted, better offense, better coach BUT Giants team of destiny like de 1968 Jets, 2005 Red Sox, and 2004 Rob and Amber. Giants win! Giants win! Giants win! FINAL SCORE: GIANTS 27 PATRIOTS 24

Baron Destructo: With Superbowl XLII finally upon us, the most excruciatingly boring NFL season in recent memory draws to its merciful and highly predictable conclusion. Nevertheless, tomorrow, all of the moonbase’s laser death ray targeting systems will be tuned into not Cleveland, Ohio, but the big game as we at the League of Aliens and Mutants for Evil will sit back and watch the New England Patriots steamroll the New York Giants like Dr. Disastro’s mechanical squid ran roughshod over that Big and Tall in Albuquerque last Spring. Evil genius Patriots coach Bill Belichick had two weeks to engineer the Giants’ defeat. Two weeks! It took ME only ten days to plot the successful downfall of Dijibouti! The Patriots shall destroy their opponent to the delight of Bostonians, the chagrin of New Yorkers, and the general apathy of everyone else. FINAL SCORE: Patriots 44 Giants 21.

Today’s video: Behind the scenes on Outcast. Shooting the replicator fall against green screen -

http://s230.photobucket.com/albums/ee164/BaronDestructo/?action=view¤t=Replicatorfree-fall.flv

Today’s mailbag:

Teslan writes: “In the original idea that Mr. Flanigan pitched out, did he go to Earth alone, or did Ronon or any other members of the team go with him? And which of the writers was responsible for the scene with Shep’s brother?”

Answer: Joe’s original pitch consisted of Sheppard tracking down a replicator on Earth. We filled in the blanks, coming up with the story and breaking it over the course of a day or two. With regard to the Shep scene, the writers came up with the beat in the room after which Alan wrote the scene.

PG-15 writes: “The many pineapples appearances, despite the fact that I was allergic to it, therefore an obvious attempt to mock me?”

Answer: Hey, I think I’m allergic to pineapple too! Also, yes, we were mocking you.

Squeakiep writes: “ With Martin Wood working on “Sanctuary”, does that mean we will not see him direct any Season 5 episodes??”

Answer: Like Amanda, Martin’s involvement in Atlantis’s fifth season will be dependent on his Sanctuary schedule. If all goes well, he should be swinging by to direct some episodes in the back half.

Sq2830 writes: “In short, could you confirm whether the new commander is or is not another character from SG-1?”

Answer: I cannot.

Inpa writes: “Will details like which writers and producers will return also be announced in Sci-Fi’s press release or will you just fill us in here?”

Answer: Last year’s writing/producing staff will return for the show’s fifth season including Carl Binder who will hopefully join us the second the WGA strike is settled. Also, look for scripts from both Robert C. Cooper and Brad Wright.

Wraitfodder writes: “Was there a scene filmed with Sheppard and the horse?”

Answer: No, there wasn’t.

Sarah L. writes: “What is the most expensive thing that has been broken on set?”

Anwer: Clearly, the most precious thing ever broken on set was Carl’s heart the day the Asgard were wiped out.

February 1, 2008

2008-02-03T17:33:00.000-08:00

Well, we had our first notes session of the season with SciFi the other day and I’ll admit to having been a tad nervous going in. There was the typical anxiety that accompanies every notes sessions (Will they love it? Will they hate it? Will they be ambivalent and wander off part-way through the conference call, leaving us to prattle on aimlessly to fill the uncomfortable silence until we realize there is no one on the other end?), and then there was the anxiety that comes with the introduction of a new player. We, at Stargate, were spoiled for many years. We had developed a terrific working relationship with Nora O’Brien, and when we received word at the end of last season that she was moving over to NBC, we were a) incredibly happy for her and, b) incredibly worried for us. But those initial concerns were assuaged with our introduction to SciFi’s new VP of development, Chris Sanagustin. Over the course of my conversations with Chris in the months leading up to start of Atlantis‘s fifth season, I found her to be intelligent, professional, witty and, bottom line, a genuinely nice person. All well and good - but what kind of notes could we expect from her? Would she nitpick the scripts, expressing her disapproval of everything from the episode title to our reckless use of the Times New Roman script font? Would she offer broad, cryptic comments like “Funny?” and “The end of Act Four feels…I don’t know…inorganic.”. Or would she, as a newcomer to the show, require an in-depth crash-course in Stargate 101 that would have us on the phone until the middle of next week?

I’m pleased to report: none of the above. In short, the call went very, very, very well. Sure, there were plenty of notes (it took us a little over two hours to cover all three scripts), some big, some small, but there was never a time during the phone conversation when Paul, Martin or I exchanged the time-honored “WTF?” looks or even came close to breaking down in tears (We all know how sensitive Martin is). Not once! Chris’s input was smart, constructive and, no doubt, will go a long way toward making the episodes that much better. Also in on Wednesday’s call were Deb Curtis from Sony and, on the SciFi side, walking SF encyclopedia Claire Sharood, and executive VP of original programming Mark Stern. Now Mark is a guy who often bears the brunt of much of the fan anger whenever those ubiquitous letter-writing campaigns kicks into high gear. They killed off Beckett! It’s Mark Stern’s fault! They repainted the Atlantis gate room! It’s Mark Stern’s fault! My feet hurt! It’s Mark Stern’s fault! With no way of knowing what goes on behind the scenes, I suppose fans are always inclined to target the network as the bad guy - which is really a little short-sighted and unfair. In truth, Mark has been a big advocate of the show and his input and support have been instrumental in Atlantis’s continuing success, not to mention much-appreciated by the production. Oh, and just so you know, once that press release comes out on Monday - Mark played a big part in ensuring a certain character’s return to the ranks of the recurring.

On the subject of Stargate Atlantis - a lot of you have commented and left questions about Amanda Tapping’s new project: Sanctuary. Were we surprised by the decision? How do we feel about said decision? How will this decision affect Atlantis? Well, we at Stargate have always supported our large, extended family - both on the set of our show and off. We realize that Amanda was faced with a very difficult decision and respect her desire to strike out on her own. A lot of the people involved in the Sanctuary project are Stargate alumni, and we sincerely wish them nothing but the best. As stated in the SciFi press release, Amanda will guest star on Atlantis’s fifth season - but the exact number of appearances by Colonel Carter will be wholly dependant on Amanda’s availability and the types of stories we have in the works. Still, Carter will be one of a number of familiar faces that will be popping up in the Pegasus Galaxy in season 5 - including a new commander. Remember way back, when I said we had considered a handful of possible candidates for the command position at the beginning of season 4? Well this person made that short list then, and we’re VERY excited about his/her/its(?) addition to our cast of regulars. As for who it is and what other little surprises we have in store…head on over to the SciFi site Monday morning and start refreshing.

Finally, at the end of season 4, assistant props master Sean McGee was kind enough to make me a copy of some of the snaps he took of Atlantis’s fourth season finale. Check ’em out and thank Sean the next time you see him.

Mailbag returns tomorrow - along with Baron Destructo and Cookie Monster who will be stopping by with their Superbowl predictions.

January 31, 2008

2008-02-03T17:32:00.000-08:00

Have you ever sat back watching Iron Chef, marveling over the numerous imaginative dishes, and thought: “Damn! I wish I could find a restaurant that actually served food like this!” Well, Marty G. and I are fortunate enough to have found just such a place. Fuel Restaurant is a little over a year old and yet, in that short time, it has established itself as one of Vancouver’s premiere dining destinations. We love the place and, apparently, the feeling is mutual. Owner/Sommelier Tom Doughty and Owner/Chef Rob Belcham apparently look forward to our semi-regular visits as it gives them the opportunity to test out some of their more adventurous culinary creations

Last night, Martin and I decided to set aside the regular menu and place our fate in the skillful hands of Chef Belcham and his team. “Surprise us,”I suggested. We started with the house-cured prosciutto which was, in Martin’s humble opinion, the best prosciutto he’s ever had. And I find it hard to disagree. The prosciutto’s smokiness was beautifully contrasted by its underlying subtle sweetness, the exquisite pink shavings literally melting in our mouths. Soups followed: the German butter potato and rosemary soup for him, and a lovely duck consommé for me. For our next course, I received the Jeruselam Artichoke Risotto with the house smoked duck. The risotto was wonderful, but that house smoked duck was truly intense and outstanding. Although neither Martin nor I are salad-guys, we did enjoy Martin’s heirloom beetroot and butter lettuce salad thanks in no small part, to the accompanying house-made ricotta, fireweed honey, and lime. Next, they brought out the big guns: a pan-fried foie gras for me, and a foie-gras and duck confit terrine for Martin. “This here is dangerous,”Martin noted as we cross-sampled both dishes. While there was no underestimating the artery-clogging potential of the pan-fried foie gras, the richness of the terrine was deliciously deceptive. Although we were nearing our satiation point, we welcomed the next two dishes: a perfectly poached piece of wild salmon for Martin and two plump scallops in a can’t-get-enough-of-the-stuff salsa verde. Well, that did it. We were stuffed. Martin and I sat back in our chairs, fully satisfied. At which point Tom came over and cleared the candles and bread off the table, “making room” he informed us. There was more. Martin and I exchanged concerned looks as Tom set an enormous knife down. Clearly, there was some serious cutting ahead. Tom ducked back to the kitchen and returned seconds later with the piece de resistance: an incredibly tender stuffed lamb neck served with thinly sliced truffled potatoes cooked in garlic confit and clarified butter. Yes, we were full. And, no, we couldn’t help ourselves. We finished all of the lamb. As they whisked our empty plates away, I warned Martin: “If I’m not in the office by ten a.m. tomorrow, assume I’m dead. Please send someone to the house to take care of the dogs.” And then came dessert - a roasted dolce de leche pound cake with pumpkin confit and cinnamon cocoa sorbet for him, and the Manjari dark chocolate mousse with hazelnuts and salted caramel for me.

“This would be a great place to have a special Stargate dinner,”Martin suggested as our meal (and his wine pairings) wound down. “You should just get a bunch of people from your blog to together during the Creation Con.” Tom and especially Chef Belcham (who, it turns out is a fan of the show) loved the idea. Hey, maybe we can convince him to create a foie gras and duck confit Stargate for the occasion.

I’ll say it again. Another fantastic meal at Fuel. We’ll be back next Wednesday.

What follows is a breakdown of the pics from the memorable evening -

#1: Martin presents the house-cured prosciutto. It was so good that I actually felt sorry for Fondy who was missing out.

#2: Martin shows off the German butter potato and rosemary soup.

#3: While I do the honors for the duck consommé.

#4: Martin marvels over his heirloom beetroot and butter lettuce salad.

#5: I show off the Jeruselam artichoke risotto with the house-smoked duck.

#6: Martin is hypnotized by the duck confit and foie gras terrine.

#7: Hot! Hot! HOT PLATE of foie gras!

#8: Hey, check out Martin’s poached salmon.

#9: Ooooh. Scallops!

#10: Martin shoes off his killer knife skills.

#11: The piece de resistance!

#12: Stuffed lamb neck.

#13: Tom Doughty comes back to make sure we’re still alive.

#14: A coy Martin G. and his dolce de leche pound cake.

#15: The Manjari chocolate mousse with hazelnuts, salted caramel, and fake smile.

Today’s blog is dedicated to Shipperahoy’s puppy Spaz who is recovering from surgery. Get better soon, Spaz!

Mailbag -

Aelfgyu writes: “Greyias and I have been discussing Carson’s return. […] We’ve finally worked it out, however. Prepare to be amazed!”

Answer: Brilliantly incorrect, yet amazing nevertheless!

Promogirl writes: “Did the actors pose in any way for it?”

Answer: Nope. The artist worked off various stills.

Erika writes: “Did you listen to Torri’s interview? […] I am not sure if I want her back now considering how you and the rest of The Powers That Be treated her.“

Answer: Let me be clear. Weir’s role was originally envisioned as a parallel to the Hammond role on SG-1. And so, unlike the team, it wasn’t intended that she head off-world every episode. Like it or not, the character of Weir was intended to play a supporting role to that of the team. Still - while Brad was running Atlantis, he was very supportive and protective of the character, working hard to make sure she got her fair share of stories, and to suggest otherwise is not only disingenuous, but a slap in the face to a guy who was the driving force behind episodes like Before I Sleep, The Real World, and The Long Goodbye. The decision to make the change came at the end of season three simply because that’s when we started making plans for season four. No conspiracy. Just simple logic. Finally, as a point of interest, do you know how many actors find out their role on a show has been diminished or done away with? The season wraps, the actor leaves for hiatus, and then his or her contract isn’t picked up. Their agent does the math for them. To many producers, this a much easier and less confrontational way of handling the situation which, obviously, lacks the professional courtesy and respect of a face to face meeting.

Marielabbott writes: “Any chance Weir might be figuring prominently in the mid-season two-parter?”

Answer: Nope.

Charly Kinder a ecrit: “ Je vous souhaite plein de restaurants !”

Answer: Lulu trouve votre Frenchie tres cute.

Padawan Aneiki writes: “Just out of curiosity, what’s your process for selecting the nominees for the BOTM?”

Answer: I just scan my bookshelves and pick out whichever titles catch my interest.

Promogirl writes: “Can you give us an inkling as to the number of episodes we’ll see Amanda in?”

Answer: Carter’s presence on Atlantis in season 5 will be dependent on two things: 1) Amanda’s availability, and 2) The stories we come up.

Tess writes: “Will you or any of the Stargate gang be in attendance at the 2008 San Diego Comic Con?”

Answer: No doubt someone will be there representing the Stargate franchise.

Brendan writes: “So when you were deciding about who was to replace Weir…did you guys honestly think of creating a new character???”

Answer: This possibility was considered early on but quickly dismissed. It was decided that we already had a number of terrific established characters to choose from and, in the end, the Carter character got the nod.

Anne Teldy writes: “Will my namesake be eaten by space cows in “Broken Ties” or are you going to torture me by making me wait for it?”

Answer: Nope, not Broken Ties. Whispers maybe.

January 30, 2008

2008-02-03T17:31:00.000-08:00

To those of you (and I know that there are a few) awaiting that announcement regarding Atlantis’s 5th season - I’ve received definite word that absolutely, positively, fer-real, the big press release is coming out this Monday. We’re just awaiting word on one final piece of the puzzle…

Here at the nominees for late March-early April’s book of the month club selections in the categories of science fiction, fantasy, and horror. Vote for the titles you’d like to read/discuss. The polls will remain open until midnight Sunday. The winners will be announced in Monday’s blog entry.

The Fantasy Nominees:

Jeffrey Ford’s The Empire of Ice Cream
(From Booklist: “A book that opens with a story about creatures who live their entire existences in sand castles, from when youthful builders abandon them to when the tide destroys them, demands readers possessing a healthy sense of wonder and the willingness to embrace the bizarre and fantastic. The title story beautifully twists the experience and senses of a synesthetic musician to answer the question, what would happen if synesthetic experiences took on physical forms? “The Weight of Words” takes the phrase seriously to explore the sinister potential of print. “Boatman’s Holiday” depicts what Charon, the boatman of Hades, does on vacation. Giants and unidentifiable alien creatures, fairy tales, the intertwining of wonder and terror, and fantastic views of both the strange and the ordinary all appear in this marvelous collection, with Ford’s comments on his inspiration and motivations appended to each story.”)

VS.

Patrick Rothfuss’s The Name of the Wind: The King-Killer Chronicle, Day 1

(From Publishers Weekly: “The originality of Rothfuss’s outstanding debut fantasy, the first of a trilogy, lies less in its unnamed imaginary world than in its precise execution. Kvothe (”pronounced nearly the same as ‘Quothe’ “), the hero and villain of a thousand tales who’s presumed dead, lives as the simple proprietor of the Waystone Inn under an assumed name. Prompted by a biographer called Chronicler who realizes his true identity, Kvothe starts to tell his life story. From his upbringing as an actor in his family’s traveling troupe of magicians, jugglers and jesters, the Edema Ruh, to feral child on the streets of the vast port city of Tarbean, then his education at “the University,” Kvothe is driven by twin imperatives—his desire to learn the higher magic of naming and his need to discover as much as possible about the Chandrian, the demons of legend who murdered his family.”)

The Science Fiction Nominees:

Gregory Benford’s Timescape
(From Amazon.com: “It’s 1998, and a physicist in Cambridge, England, attempts to send a message backward in time. Earth is falling apart, and a government faction supports the project in hopes of diverting or avoiding the environmental disasters beginning to tear at the edges of civilization. It’s 1962, and a physicist in California struggles with his new life on the West Coast, office politics, and the irregularities of data that plague his experiments. The story’s perspective toggles between time lines, physicists, and their communities. Timescape presents the subculture and world of scientists in microcosm: the lab, the loves, the grappling for grants, the pressures from university and government, the rewards and trials of relationships with spouses, the pressures of the scientific race, and the thrill of discovery. ”

VS.

Neal Stephenson’s The Diamond Age: Or, A Young Lady’s Illustrated Primer

(From Amazon.com: “John Percival Hackworth is a nanotech engineer on the rise when he steals a copy of “A Young Lady’s Illustrated Primer” for his daughter Fiona. The primer is actually a super computer built with nanotechnology that was designed to educate Lord Finkle-McGraw’s daughter and to teach her how to think for herself in the stifling neo-Victorian society. But Hackworth loses the primer before he can give it to Fiona, and now the “book” has fallen into the hands of young Nell, an underprivileged girl whose life is about to change.”)

The Horror Nominees:

Joe Hill’s Heart-Shaped Box

(From Publisher’s Weekly: “Middle-aged rock star Judas Coyne collects morbid curios for fun, so doesn’t think twice about buying a suit advertised at an online auction site as haunted by its dead owner’s ghost. Only after it arrives does Judas discover that the suit belonged to Craddock McDermott, the stepfather of one of Coyne’s discarded groupies, and that the old man’s ghost is a malignant spirit determined to kill Judas in revenge for his stepdaughter’s suicide. Judas isn’t quite the cad or Craddock the avenging angel this scenario makes them at first, but their true motivations reveal themselves only gradually in a fast-paced plot that crackles with expertly planted surprises and revelations.”)

VS.

F. Paul Wilson’s The Keep

(From Amazon.com: “Thus reads the message received from a Nazi commander stationed in a small castle high in the remote Transylvanian Alps. And when an elite SS extermination squad is dispatched to solve the problem, the men find a something that’s both powerful and terrifying. Invisible and silent, the enemy selects one victim per night, leaving the bloodless and mutilated corpses behind to terrify its future victims. Panicked, the Nazis bring in a local expert on folklore–who just happens to be Jewish–to shed some light on the mysterious happenings. And unbeknownst to anyone, there is another visitor on his way–a man who awoke from a nightmare and immediately set out to meet his destiny.The battle has begun: On one side, the ultimate evil created by man, and on the other….the unthinkable, unstoppable, unknowing terror that man has inevitably awakened.”)

Well, I’m off to Fuel with Marty G. tonight. Breakdown and pics tomorrow.

Today’s video: Snow Bunny II: The Quickening. Scroll down to check it out or click the following link -

http://s230.photobucket.com/albums/ee164/BaronDestructo/?action=view¤t=SnowLulu2.flv

Today’s mailbag:

K8T writes: “Does Fondy have fashionable outfits for a 10week old female Norwegian Buhound?”

Answer: I’m sure she does. And maybe a hat to go with it.

Cindee writes: “I just bought a copy of Elizabeth Moon’s “Command Decision”. Have you ever read it?”

Answer: I haven’t, but her Speed of Dark is one of my favorite books.

Kath in Baltimore writes: “Also, I couldn’t help noticing the gaps in the fence are kind of wide. Has Lulu every tried to or successfully escaped?”

Answer: When we first got her, I let her out front. She casually slipped through the bars and started grazing on the other side of the fence. Thankfully, she’s now too hippy to squeeze through.

Prior of the Ori writes: “McKay said that the planet was where they first developed Drone technology, does this mean they never had it back in the Milky Way?”

Answer: No, that was an oversight. The drone technology was developed in the Milky Way, but the mini-drone version was perfected in Pegasus.

Matt S. writes: “Do you feel the Wraith are a success in how they’ve been written and developed, and do you feel they are as effectively entrenched as an enemy with a backstory and impact as the Goa’uld were by this same point in that series?”

Answer: I think that what makes a villain great is their depth as characters - not merely as foils for our protagonists, but as interesting personalities. If you do a season by season comparison with SG-1, the goa’uld definitely had the advantage in this respect because a) they were human in appearance and b) were far more colorful. The goa’uld were fun villains because it was easy to differentiate them as individuals with differing, occasionally conflicting agendas. In the case of the wraith, I think it wasn’t until the show’s third and fourth season that they really began to take on some of these same characteristics, conveyed through backstory elements like the ongoing wars between the various factions, our unlikely alliance with them, and the introduction of Todd. I also think that Michael, in many ways, helped to bridge the gap between functional adversary and villain-you-love-to-hate.

Fran writes: “Are there any good schnitzel places in Vancouver?”

Answer: Hell, yes. Go to The Budapest on Main (corner of 16th) and order the Transylvania Platter for 3 (which will get you three types of schnitzel).

Hannah writes: “How often do you writers find yourselves being surprised by your characters?”

Answer: Our characters are always growing - either on the page or through the performances of our actors - so, yes, they are fully capable of surprising us.

DJ writes: “What color are Joe Flanigan’s eyes?”

Answer: Believe it or not, I haven’t noticed.

January 29, 2008

2008-02-03T17:30:00.000-08:00

SNOW DAY!!!! Vancouver was hit by a powerful snowstorm overnight that shut down schools and made driving treacherous in some areas. The streets have been likened to skating rinks and, while this kind of weather wouldn’t normally deter a former Montrealer like myself, it’s not me I’m worried about. Fondy’s four-wheel drive Audi A4 is, unfortunately, trumped by the average Vancouverite’s complete inability to drive in these wintery conditions. It kind of reminds me of the commuter panic in L.A. whenever it rains (“We are issuing a travel advisory! The streets are wet! Stay off the roads! We repeat! Stay off the roads! May God be with you!”). Anyway, with Paul snowed in on the North Shore and nary a snowplow in sight, we decided not to challenge the elements (and the general incompetence of our fellow drivers) and, instead, elected to work from home today. And quite a day it was. I read, researched, looked at baby pictures (Seriously, they all look identical to me. I’m sure Marty G. will do a wonderful job deciding.), and even found time to clean out the fridge. Alex Levine was supposed to swing by this afternoon and help me build a snow fort but it looks like I’ve been stood up.

So, what’s everybody reading? It better be either Fast Forward 1, Smoke and Mirrors, or Children of the Night because they’re the selections for February’s book of the month club discussions. I’ve yet to start any of them myself (I’m presently halfway through George R. R. Martin’s Fevre Dream) but I’m a fast reader and will no doubt blaze through them with plenty of time to spare.

Today’s video: Lulu does her best imitation of a snow bunny. Check out the video by scrolling down or by heading over to -

http://s230.photobucket.com/albums/ee164/BaronDestructo/?action=view¤t=SnowLulu1.flv

A light mailbag today. I expect that will change tomorrow. Just a feeling…

Astrumporta writes: “I seem to remember reading that Joe Flanigan thought Sheppard would not be from a rich family. Do you know why, or why the writers decided he is?”

Answer: We simply thought it would make for a more interesting backstory. Also, Sheppard has always kind of reminded me of Richie Rich all grown up.

Marielabbott writes: “When you mention that you will be revisiting Weir’s story onscreen–will we be seeing Torri?”

Answer: That is the plan.

Wraithfodder writes: “Have you thought of making an SGA episode in the snow?”

Answer: Unless there’s a story-specific reason for it to be snowing (ie. Quest II) or the location happens to be snowy (ie. Threshold) it’s not something we would do as it would prove an unnecessary expense.

Laura P. writes: “Recently, I caught a repeat of “Reunion”. During that episode, there is a scene with Sheppard and Carter on the balcony. Sheppard tries to convince Carter to allow him to go on a mission to rescue Weir. I couldn’t help but notice that this scene was somewhat similar to the season one episode (The Rising) where Sheppard wants to rescue Col. Sumner. Was this intentional or coincidental?”

Answer: It was intentional.

Zoniduck writes: “Alas, Phoenix has no restaurant week. Is there anything like this in Vancouver? And if so, do you participate?”

Answer: This city does something called Dine Out Vancouver, a couple of weeks in which participating restaurants offer set specials. On the one hand, it’s a great way to check out a variety of new restaurants without spending a bundle. On the other hand, these restaurants are so heavily booked that the meals they serve are never reflective of the true quality of the food they serve, more of a half-assed B game than the establishment’s best effort. And, no, I don’t participate.

Shiningwit writes: “Which of the dogs misses Fondy the most?”

Answer: Hard to say. Maximus and Jelly are pretty laid back and are harder to read. Bubba and Lulu, however, are more inclined to perk up and sniff the phone if they hear Fondy’s voice on the other end.

Jesse writes: “What I’d like to know is if studios, specifically animation studios would hire someone like me, at this age, attending school, and with no experience to speak of. Do studios have any internships or part-time positions for writers?”

Answer: I suppose it depends what you’re looking to do. Are you a talented artist? If so, then it’s very likely an animation studio would hire you. As for internships or part-time positions for writers - most animation shows are written by freelancers. That said, I’d suggest sending query letters out to some animation studios and find out exactly what their respective policies are when it comes to interns and part-timers.

Pauline writes: “Are there any books that would give me an insight into how animation scripts work?”

Answer: Here’s a secret - writing for animation isn’t all that different from writing for live action. Nearly all shows use the same script format. The real difference is in the act structure and length (and, of course, the subject matter).

Jean writes: “ Enjoyed Harmony very much. Could the “secret sacred ceremony” to determine the next queen have been a test to see which of the sisters had the strongest ATA gene??”

Answer: Or determined whether the next queen had the ATA gene at all.

RachelCooperLPN writes: “Though you have adamently (sp?) said that you are not going to attend the Creation con in Vancouver, is there a chance that you will make an appearance at a picnic some of the fans are having outside the studio?”

Answer: If I’m free, I’ll certainly stop by to say hello.

Paloosa writes: “Are you concerned or ok with the rating numbers so far for Season 4?”

Answer: So far, I’ve been pleased with the ratings.

Ant writes: “Hence that’s why Kevin O’Donnell poisoned him towards the end because he saw him as being partly responsible. Even though Kevin O’Donnell was probably involved in a lot of the atrocities he had to blame someone else.”

Answer: If that’s the case, then why did O’Donnell wait so long to do it? It doesn’t make sense that he waited because he wanted Herity to complete the task of ferreting out the Madman because, at the time he would have held Herity accountable, he wouldn’t have known that the Madman was going to fall into his hands.

narellefromaus writes: “Thanks Joe for being a conduit for dogs being adopted.”

Answer: Hey, my pleasure. I think adoption is a great idea.

January 28, 2008

2008-02-03T17:29:00.002-08:00

Interesting reactions to last Friday’s episode. Most went something like this: “I really expected to hate Harmony, but I ended up being pleasantly surprised.” “Hey, it didn’t suck!”rave the fans. Thanks for that. And Marty G. thanks you as well. We were both surprised by the volume of positive responses to that painting revealed at episode’s end. While I love the idea of making it available as a print, t-shirt, or poster - I’m not sure Joe F. would be quite as enthused. Some of you suggested we should auction it off and, yes, that would be a great idea - so long as the lucky winner is willing to swing on by the production offices and haul it away in a flatbed truck. The thing is HUGE!

Last night’s broiled filet of sole was good but, I have to admit, tonight’s dinner was better. After several days of fending for myself, I decided to let the gang at Fuel fend for me. And they did not disappoint. The German Butter Potato & Rosemary Soup with a sunken isle of pork confit and touch of paprika proved a hearty winter offering. I followed it up with the decadently smooth foie gras torchon. For my main, I had the roasted ling cod, crisply bronzed yet subtle and tender, served atop a bed of arrow leaf spinach and pork belly, then topped with pickled chanterelles. I truly missed this place. Yes, I’ve been remiss, but I’m sure I’ll rectify that in the coming weeks. Marty G. has already booked us a table for Wednesday night.

For those of you still keeping track of this sort of thing, the early numbers on Harmony show a nice uptick from last week, equaling the ratings for Adrift and Spoils of War.

Today’s entry is dedicated to birthday gal Tina.

Mailbag -

Tenmongaku writes: “Do you guys have staff meetings or something before starting filming of an episode?”

Answer: Prep week begins with a concept meeting that is attended by the producer, the director, and all of the department heads. Subsequent meetings with the various departments take place in the days leading up to the first day of production.

Annie from Freemantle writes: “ Oh a friend asked me a question of pugs.. can they take some of Australia’s summer heat?”

Answer: No, pugs do not fare well in hot weather. They’re very delicate dogs.

Matt S. writes: “Have you had a chance to pick up Mister B. Gone by Clive Barker yet?”

Answer: I haven’t, although I do like his stuff. Let me know what you think.

Matt S. also writes: “when the episode Harmony was written, was Jodelle Ferland a quick decision to fill the title role?”

Answer: Yes, Jodelle was our first and only choice. We made sure she was onboard before Martin even started work on the script.

Mags writes: “How long did it take to film Harmony? And were the nighttime scenes filmed on location as well or on the set to give you more flexibility with time?”

Answer: Like most of our episodes, Harmony was a 7-day shooting. Most of it was filmed on location with the exception of the scenes in the village, and the cave sequence which were filmed on our standing sets.

Aurora writes: “Was wondering what you thought of the Amazing Race finale this year.”

Answer: Meh. As much as I enjoyed this season and was pleased with the final three, I thought the final task (assembling the various items) was confusing and visually uninteresting. A bit of a disappointment. Still, nice to see the hippies win.

Luis writes: “ When you say that they were looking to Drasticly reduce RDA’s role was this a RDA decision or a manegement decision??”

Answer: As someone already said, this was Rick’s decision borne of a desire to spend more time with his daughter.

Farscapefan writes: “in case you forgot, Vala IS part of the team. Now what you said sounds to me like you’re trying to prove something else, that Carter is the ONLY girl on SG-1 and Vala is entirely a fifth wheel..”

Answer: Sure, sounds to you. What I said, “As for a movie entirely devoted to the Vala character - again, I can’t speak for Brad and Robert but I think that would be highly unlikely. Future movies should focus on the team.”, was in response to your statement that the next SG-1 movie should be entirely devoted to her character - “Vala is too important character to really big part of the audience and deserve a story in the movie as the MAIN character, devoted to her entirely.”

Astrumporta writes: “Joe, if Sci Fi never puts out a press release before S5 starts filming, will you then be allowed to tell us who shows up for work? I think it will be hard to keep it secret for long!”

Answer: I’ll take pictures on the day and let you do the math.

Yasmin writes: “I was wondering, since you guys mentioned previously that the Weir story line would be visited in S5, would that be done sort of behind the scenes way?”

Answer: No, we’ll revisit the story - onscreen - in season 5.

January 27, 2008

2008-02-03T17:29:00.001-08:00

So I was eating a power bar today, looking over the nutritional information, when I noticed the best before date on the inside of the wrapper: “Exp. 07/03/08 08:28AM”. Not “08:27AM” or “08:29AM” or even “8:00AM-ish” but exactly “08:28AM”. How’s that for accuracy. Do you suppose that if I actually set it aside for a few months, I could detect a slight yet discernible difference between the flavor of the bar consumed at 6:00AM compared to, oh, 1:30PM? Probably. After all, calculating the shelf life of power bars is an exact science. It’s not like milk or ground beef where the best before date is really more of a suggestion than a rule set in stone.

Oh, I know what you’re thinking. Poor Joe, incapable of even opening up a can of La Costena whole black beans, he has resigned himself to the simplicity of power bars. What’s next? Saltines and shredded cardboard in milk? Well, you’ll be pleased to hear that I’m actually doing alright. Last night, I made myself a wonderful broiled filet of sole with cipolinni onions in a brown butter sauce. On tonight’s menu: more filet of sole, this time broiled with lemon and parsley. Yeah, I’ve been doing alright on my own but I really feel I’ve held off long enough. Maybe tomorrow night I’ll swing by Fuel and see how Tom and Chef Belcham are doing.

Someone commented today about the gunfire in the behind the scenes segments. In essence: “Pretty damn loud no?” YES! As I responded to IamJohn, the gunfire is so loud that the cast and crew are given ear plugs for these scenes. The ear plugs muffle the sounds of the gunfire, but they also make it harder to hear the director…

http://s230.photobucket.com/albums/ee164/BaronDestructo/?action=view¤t=Joegunfire.flv

Today’s mailbag:

Pauline writes: “Did Marty G have the portrait in the script from the beginning…”

Anwer: Yes, he did.

Mackenzie’s Momma writes: “Wouldn’t that line refer more to Miller’s Crossing than McKay and Mrs. Miller?!”

Answer: Woops, my mistake. I went back and fixed it.

ccdsah writes: “Is it possible that she’ll direct a season 5 episode?”

Answer: No actors will be directing episodes this season.

Emily writes: “Speaking of books, have you started on Bright of the Sky yet?”

Answer: Just finished it last night. Let me know what you think.

IamJohn writes: “Are the fake gunshots not loud enough to cause problems, or am I just missing something?”

Answer: No, those rounds are damn loud. So loud, in fact, that the cast and crew are given ear plugs before any scenes requiring gunfire - which kind of makes it hard to hear anything else. Check out today’s clip.

Morjana Coffman writes: “In watching “Harmony” again today (for the fourth time), I noticed in the closed captioning that they referred to Rodney’s handheld device as a PFD.

PFD as in…?”

Answer: Plot Forwarding Device.

Doci121787 writes: “Also im going to be in Vancouver in a couple of weeks, what is a good French resturant for a first timer?”

Answer: I’d suggest Bistro Bistrot on West 4th.

Squall78 writes: “My question was if you had any numbers for the Live + 7 for “BAMSR”.”

Answer: To be honest, I haven’t bothered looking into them, but I’m sure the numbers are out there somewhere.

Katja writes: “Whatever happened to the ship Tria?”

Answer: Without hyperspace capabilities, it is now a very interesting museum piece located somewhere between both galaxies.

C writes: “Forgot to ask, was there some outside reason for Harmony not including the whole team (actors were busy) or was it just planned that way because? Was there thought about the inside reason for why Ronon and Teyla wouldn’t be there?”

Answer: Rachel was far along in her pregnancy and we wanted to give her some time off to rest. Jason was also on baby watch and we needed a Ronon-light episode so that he could dash off for the birth without it affecting production.

Farscapefan writes: “…there’s a chance that Brad Wright or Rob Cooper will invite Claudia to the third or perhaps fourth SG-1 movie? Vala is too important character to really big part of the audience and deserve a story in the movie as the MAIN character, devoted to her entirely.”

Answer: I can’t speak for Brad and Robert, but I can say that we have no plans for Vala in Atlantis. As for a movie entirely devoted to the Vala character - again, I can’t speak for Brad and Robert but I think that would be highly unlikely. Future movies should focus on the team.

Mags writes: “Where you inspired by the Dolphins in Hitchhiker’s Guide when thinking up the Whangels?”

Answer: It was more than mere coincidence.

Poundpuppy29 writes: “The decision may have been made but fans have made a difference before it has happened in this franchise remember the Daniel wars I wasn’t around then but I have read plenty about it and they did make a difference.”

Answer: Um, according to who? The people who took part in the campaign? In reality, the decision to bring Daniel back had everything to do with Michael’s talent, longtime viewers’ familiarity with his character, and the fact that the show was looking at drastically reduced role for Richard Dean Anderson. So, bad example. Better example: perhaps the Save Carson Beckett campaign? Well, let’s wait and see what season 5 brings.

January 26, 2008

2008-02-03T17:27:00.000-08:00

Way back on December 31, 2006, I put together a little spoiler poem that offered hints to upcoming episodes, covering the back half of Atlantis’s third season and into season four. Well, almost all of the hints finally revealed, I thought I would give you a breakdown of the clues in the poem and how they related to the various episodes…

Atlantis assailed by the stuff of nightmares,

(Doppelganger - Robert Cooper walked into the writers‘s room one morning and said “ I want to do the Atlantis version of Dreamscape.”. We stared back at him blankly. Huh? “The Atlantis version of Nightmare on Elm Street,”he tried again. Oooooh! We got it! And fans and Joe [who’d been petitioning] finally got a dark side Sheppard]).
While the team will explore that dark sunken lair.
(Submersion - Director of Photography Brenton Spencer does a very nice job on his first Atlantis directing assignment).
For one player worship, adoration and fame,
As he and his rival find it’s more than a game.

(The Game - This one came in short, so Carl ended up introducing a very entertaining B-story involving Zelenka and Lorne).

Receive a grand gift from an all-seeing shaman.

(The Seer - The Woolsey character’s involvement in the first draft of the script felt a little one note. Then, Robert Cooper suggested putting a little spin on his by-the-book attitude. Instead of weighing in with his opinion, he was going to try very hard to sit on the sidelines and allow us to do our job. Easier said than done of course.).

Find the wraith and our allies have something in common.

(Spoils of War - This one was the biggest stretch - the allies in question being the Asgard. The thing they have in common? Why, cloning technology of course).

A tech-savvy group who progress via pillage.

(Travelers - The Travelers were the first of the technologically advanced races we want to introduce to the Pegasus Galaxy. We’re working on another.)
A wild west High Noon in an inapt Dutch village.

(Irresponsible - We were all set to shoot this in a suitably Western-looking location - until we found out that the location we’d had our hearts set on was not going to work for us. So instead, we elected to shoot at this bizarre-looking location that worked out great for SG-1’s Revisions, but not so hot for this episode. Alas, when it rains it pours. The location snafu was just one of many, many things that went horribly awry).

Too late the value of that friendship he’ll learn.

(Sunday - You know the old saying “You never know what you’ve got until it’s gone”? Saddest SG-1 moment - Meridian: Daniel says goodbye to Jack and steps through the gate. Saddest Atlantis moment: Rodney says goodbye to Carson who quietly fades away.)
A strange disappearance feeds another’s dark turn.

(Missing - The Athosian’s disappearance was intended to kick off a dark turn for Teyla’s character, one that would have run through much of season four. But with Rachel’s pregnancy, that arc changed. Still, we do catch an unsettling glimpse of this potential darkness as Teyla shows the Bola Kai little mercy).

Find survivors concealed in an orbiting rock,

(The Ark - Did anyone notice an out-of-place Snickers bar sitting on a console in one particular scene? No? That’s because we eventually noticed and had visual effects paint it out.)
While the thinker receives an enlightening shock.

(Tao of Rodney - Lots of funny moments in this one but my favorite: Radek’s hard luck story in the opening walk and talk, punctuated by McKay’s cavalier dismissal of the tragedy. Oops.)

Mutations discovered,

(Vengeance - McKay lay on his back, kicking wildly, as the creature scrabbled over him. “What’s it doing?”asked somebody in the room when we were watching the dailies. “I think he’s getting rolled for his wallet.” Sometimes, less is definitely more. The sequence was trimmed and ended up looking great.)

O’Neill is all wet.

(Rick does some underwater filming and shows he’s still got that MacGyver edge).
With a change of location all will forget.

(Tabula Rasa - This episode included guest stints by numerous big market DJ’s. Can you pick them out in the big cafeteria scene?)

Hyperion’s wrath threatens total destruction.

Our hand will be forced by ominous construction.

(Echoes - Hyperion, of course, being the sun god of Greek lore; the ominous construction a reference to the replicator fleet we take out. When we were spinning a solution for First Strike and first came up with the idea of abandoning the planet, Robert Cooper objected to the idea because we had saved the whales in Echoes, only to abandon them. After much consideration, I came up with a solution: As the city takes flight, we all glance back and watch, amazed, as the whales rise up out of the water, sprout wings, and fly away - leading Marty G. to coin the term: Whangels. Alas, the Whangels [and my idea] didn’t fly.)

Carter arrives; a reunion of sorts.
One of our own the enemy courts.

(Reunion - Ever notice how Ronon always gets the third or fourth episode the season? It’s not intentional. Honest.)

Isolation imposed and a grand battle looms,

(Lifelife - Cut off from the Milky Away, albeit temporarily, Atlantis launches a desperate bid to acquire a ZPM - and ends up kicking off the wraith-replicator war.]
While an alien contact this player dooms.

(Doppelganger - It’s hard to keep certain developments under wraps, but with the fans focused on other spoilers, Dr. Heighmeyer’s demise surprised a lot of people).

Self-doubt for one,

(The Seer - Carter is put in the hot seat. Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown].

parenthood for another

(Originally, we were toying with the idea of making Rodney and Katie parents. Of course, we couldn’t make two of our main characters parents. Is uncle-hood in the cards for McKay in season 5?)

And that brilliant young mom may be needing her brother.

(Millers Crossing - Sadly, the scene in which Sheppard comes upon Ronon sitting in the motel room, watching Battlestar Galactica was cut).

From innocents lost he’ll produce strict adherence

(Vengeance - Those unfortunate survivors of Inferno, ending up as test subjects for Michael’s mad experiments. To quote Teyla: “ It is amazing how quickly he has been able to incorporate our science into his”. Truly amazing.)

While the late fallen one makes a surprised reappearance

(The only clue that has yet to be revealed. Could Lucius Lavin be making his long-awaited reappearance? Stay tuned.)

And, oh yeah. To those of you comparing episodes to the hints I provided in my second annual spoiler poem (check out my December 31st, 2007 entry) - now that Harmony has aired, you can tick off the obvious: “Get talked into escorting a precocious young brat.”

Today’s movie - Check below or head on over to photo bucket -

http://s230.photobucket.com/albums/ee164/BaronDestructo/?action=view¤t=BehindtheScenesonHarmony-McKayatthe.flvToday’s mailbag -

Baal 527 writes: “Whose idea was it for the painting at the end of Harmony?”

Answer: One Martin Gero.

Squeakiep writes: “Harmony” was a blast! And the painting…who’s office is that hanging in???? “

Answer: That painting is HUGE. It’s now hanging in the main corridor, right beside Lawren’s office.

Jenny Robin writes: “I just wanted you to know that I don’t not like your blog.”

Answer: Well I don’t not enjoy hearing from you.

AMZ writes: “What became of the feature you two wrote?”

Answer: It’s an unproduced spec feature that served as a handy writing sample, allowing us to get our foot in the door on various productions (Stargate among them).

Majorsal writes: “in the latest amanda interview (on scifi.com), amanda mentions the cut line in ‘trio’ and makes it sound like it’s still there and not cut. is the not-so-subtle hint still in ‘trio’ or is it truly on the cutting room floor?”

Answer: It is truly on the cutting room floor. I’ll post the unedited exchange after Trio has aired.

January 25, 2008

2008-01-26T14:03:00.000-08:00

Hey! Look at what arrived in the mail today! A top-of-the-line hyperspace-ready SciFi scooter with laser capabilities and shield generator in official network colors. Unfortunately, the wormhole-drive was a factory add-on not included in this model. Nevertheless, Marty G. took it out for a preliminary spin, putting it through its paces, accidentally incinerating Stage 1, part of Post, and an unlucky teamster along the way. Not exactly the smoothest of launches but, all in all, not bad for a maiden voyage. Brad and Robert were the lucky recipients of a matching pair (There is no cuter sight than seeing those two roll off the lot together). Paul and I, meanwhile, received equally awesome SciFi multimedia players that are not only portable and iPod friendly, but actually allow one to view the future. I watched next week’s episode of Lost tonight. This thing is amazing!

Yesterday’s entry broke my traffic record here at wordpress, besting the previous high of 7 710 views with an impressive 10 928, and landing it in the Wordpress Top Ten (at the #8 spot). I can only assume many of you were so shocked by my account of last night’s dinner that you sent friends and co-workers over to read it for themselves. Well, I’m happy to report that tonight’s meal was somewhat better: roast chicken, broccoli, and a side salad of English cucumbers and heirloom tomatoes. And, yes, I did eat at home.

By the way, Baron Destructo and Cookie Monster are presently screening the Oscar contenders in preparation for their post-Awards predictions spectacular. Boy, if you thought these two didn’t know a thing about football, just you wait until Oscar night! Cookie Monster is renting a tux for the occasion.

Today’s pics: Scooter, player, Lawren back in the office and ready for business.

(BY THE WAY, THE AFOREMENTIONED PICS VIEWABLE AT -
www.josephmallozzi.wordpress.com)

A quick mailbag -

AMZ writes: “I don’t if this has been asked/answered before (shame on me), but how did you and Paul become writing partners?”

Answer: We met in a creative writing class in college, co-wrote a feature together, then partnered up to work on a teen sitcom called Student Bodies.

Wheresmyfroggy writes: “Also, why didn’t you get them micro-chipped rather than tattooed?”

Answer: I did both.

PG15 writes: “Also, has the title been changed to Search and Destroy now?”

Answer: Woops. I meant Search and Rescue. Although I suppose Search and Destroy is also applicable. It’s just not the title.

Jon K. writes: “I was wondering, if you had a chance to write an episode for any tv show throughout all time what show would you write the episode for?”

Answer: No contest. The Flintstones.

Shipperahoy writes: “I was just wondering if it was your idea to include the 42 reference in Quarantine.”

Answer: Nope. That was pure Carl Binder.

January 24, 2008

2008-01-25T13:45:00.000-08:00

Given the fact that I got home late today and had yet to post a blog entry, I elected to forego my planned dinner at Fuel in favor of a more homespun meal. And so, I pulled out the ol’ frying pan and cooked up the steaks that had been sitting in the fridge for the past couple of days. These I fed to the dogs. I, meanwhile, had a salmon salad sandwich on toasted flax multigrain loaf and a cream of cheddar cheese soup that, in hindsight, was probably not soup at all but an accompaniment to macaroni. Either that, or I should have followed the directions and added that cup of water during the cooking process. The bread was so stale I feared my penicillin allergy was going to kick in. It was a most unmemorable meal that gave me a greater appreciation for the culinary artistry of Fuel’s Chef Belcham. Hell, to be honest, even that pimply-faced kid who assembles the McDonald’s Quarter Pounder with Cheeses earns props in comparison. Still, a crappy meal was a small price to pay for completing this blog entry in a timely manner. I know how cranky some of you get staying up late waiting for my update.

I dropped Fondy off at the airport this morning, then headed in to work where we continued preparations for Atlantis’s fast-approaching fifth season. Production Designer James Robbins swung by the offices to show us some of the concept art for the first three episodes. Marty G. weighed in on Search and Destroy (He thought the roof should be lower, the construction a little more “reined in”), Paul commented on The Seed (The wraith walls are a light brown but we light them purple. All the same, he thought the shading was too light.) And I offered my thoughts on Broken Ties (At first I thought Rodney might have had a bathtub shipped over from Earth but, ultimately, decided to go with one of Lantian design). I also took the time to organize my office (somewhat), going through the stack of artwork and design packages sitting atop my desk, snapping pics along the way. I’m not sure what I’ve already shown you but, just in case - Feast your eyes while I see what I can do about playing catch-up with the mailbag. And, while you’re at it, why not check out yet another behind-the-scenes vid from Harmony. Oh, and speaking of vids, since the video links from my previous entries don’t work on wordpress, I’ve decided to make Baron Destructo’s photo bucket page public. So head on over to http://s230.photobucket.com/albums/ee164/BaronDestructo/

- and view at your leisure.

Le mailbag -

Mick writes: “ Wow, I cannot believe you disagree with the comparison to Trek.”

Answer: I’m not in a position to disagree because I haven’t seen the episode in question (I watched all of the classic Trek plus most of Voyager). My point is - if you scrutinize an episode hard enough, I’m sure you’ll find similarities with something that has come before. Star Trek has produced some thirty years of television while SG-1 ran for a decade so, yeah, chances are good you’ll notice some familiar elements somewhere along the way. All the same, I’ve often said that the most interesting thing about any story is how it influences our characters. Quarantine was less about the circumstances in which our characters found themselves and more about how they responded to the crisis and each other.

Patricia writes: “ I forgot to ask; how is Jelly’s degenerative hip condition?”

Answer: Better, thanks for asking. I’ve switched her over to a supplement for arthritic dogs that contains glucosamine and chrondroitin sulfate, and shark cartilage, and it seems to have made a world of difference. She was actually bounding around the backyard the other day.

Dougindy writes: “ You guys film at a location with a lot of sand and sand dunes/hills several times during sg1, for instance- a matter of time, moebius. Where is that site?”

Answer: I believe you’re referring to the Richmond sand dunes, located in Richmond. Or, at least they were located in Richmond. I don’t know if they still exist.

Iamza writes: “When do we vote for March’s BOTM books?”

Answer: I’ll have the nominees up this weekend.

Riley writes: “Which part of Italy is your family from?”

Answer: My father’s side was from Naples, my mother’s side from Altamura.

Osiris flight writes: “Joe, i am wondering if you are intentionally ignoring my questions. the first was about bloopers, the next few were about the video on MGM’s website.”

Answer: As much as I’d like to, I can’t possibly answer all of the questions asked on this blog. I’ll usually pick the questions that interest me at that particular sitting, generally skipping questions that I’ve already answered (Which was your favorite SG-1 episode?), questions that I have no answer for (When will season 4 be released on dvd?), questions that I won’t answer because it would require I spoil the show for fans (How is Beckett coming back?), questions that have already been answered by knowledgeable fans (Why did the wraith use the term “darts”), and questions I just plain old don’t have any interest in answering (If you could cast a talking tree, what kind of tree would it be?), or questions I just plain miss. And, other times, for reasons beyond my control, I am unable to answer a question directly. However, quite often a lot is said by what remains unsaid.

Mrs.B108 writes: “Have you considered severing Atlantis from Earth permanently, therefore changing the entire basis of storyline from exploration to survival?”

Answer: Unfortunately, the existence of ships like the Apollo and the Daedalus make this highly unlikely.

Shiningwit writes: “So how do you rate Farmer’s “To Your Scattered Bodies Go”?”

Answer: To be perfectly honest - I loved the first couple of chapters and then it went off the rails for me.

Horse N. Buggy writes: “Dreaming of Tokyo? Let me help you with the visuals. I was there a year ago - have a gander at my photos on Flickr.”

Answer: And I suspect I’ll be dreaming of Tokyo again tonight. Mmm. Mos Burger.

Astrumporta writes: “Oh, by the way, some friends and I want to come to Vancouver this summer. Can we sleep in your wok kitchen?”

Answer: That’s where I keep my valuables (a.k.a. my chocolates).

Brains103 writes: “I looked through your blog for books, but there were a lot. Too many. Could you narrow it down to (in your opinion) the best?”

Answer: Why not check out February’s book of the month club selections: Future Fiction, edited by Loud Anders, Smoke and Mirrors, by Neil Gaiman, and Children of the Night, by Dan Simmons.

January 23, 2008

2008-01-23T20:21:00.001-08:00

Well, looks like I’ll be flying solo after tonight. Fondy leaves tomorrow for an intense, month-long course in California meaning I’ll be on my own until her return in March. Well, not totally alone. I will have my dogs and the ever-comforting companionship of prime time television. Also, I will be reading like a madman. A madman who enjoys reading. A lot. Fortunately, Fondy has taken pains to ensure I want for nothing while she‘s gone, stocking up on everything from hydrogen peroxide to toilet paper. I have enough bottled water to last me into next year, and enough canned food to keep me fed until Summer - after which all bets are off and the exquisitely well-marbled Maximus will no doubt cross that fine line between cute and downright tasty-looking. Or I suppose I could just eat the Christmas ornaments like Lulu did today.

Or I could just head over to Tojo’s for sushi like we did last night (this despite Bugguy’s helpful link to that article about the alarmingly high mercury levels in tuna). The uni was unbelievably fresh, the spicy dynamite hand cones crispy, sweet, and downright delicious. Other stellar hand cones included the lobster cone, the Magnum P.I. (for those geoduck sashimi fans), and spicy tuna (but I limited myself to one, Bugguy!). A little saba and tuna tataki nigiri (I limited myself to two!), and a spider roll and inside-out salmon roll rounded out the meal. I’ve dreamt of Tokyo three nights in a row (the fact that we weren’t able to get there this past hiatus I’m sure had a lot to do with it) and this dinner was just what I needed. A little taste of my home away from home.

Pics and a special Harmony bonus vid at -

www.josephmallozzi.wordpress.com

January 22, 2008

2008-01-22T18:13:00.001-08:00

Well, I feel bad. When I dropped off Lulu for her spay yesterday, I was asked if I’d like her tattooed and chipped as well. It was a security measure we’d taken with the pugs and, since Lulu would be out for the operation anyway, I figured “Why not?“. So, I picked her up this morning (according to the staff at the vet clinic, she was a superstar) and dropped her off at Fondy’s shop for the day. And it was while Lulu was ambling about the store in her buster collar, chasing down her rat toy, that Fondy suddenly noted: “You had her tattooed.” Yeah, I had her…uh…oh. As Lulu stared up at me, I realized - I’d fucked up. Unlike the pugs whose ears fold down, Lulu’s ears sit straight up on her head, offering an unobstructed view of the inner flap - and, now, her glaring numerical tattoo.

My fault. I didn’t even think of it when I gave the okay. Fondy tried to ease the guilt by trying to convince me it was actually kind of cute (The upper row of numbers = 007!). Marty G., meanwhile, suggested I go all out and actually tattoo a heart around the numbers or some other cool design, something that will give her a little more street cred. Lulu, for her part, doesn’t seem to mind her new look.

I walked into my office to find a package awaiting me from Prometheus Books. Check ’em out. Three books in a series I’ve been dying to check out - Joel Shepherd’s Cassandra Kresnov series. I’ve heard a lot of great things about the books, and Shepherd in particular, so I’m considering making the first book, Crossover, a candidate for March’s scifi BOTM club. Also included in the package was the February scifi runner-up, Kay Kenyon’s Bright of the Sky, which I’ll start on tonight once I finish up Philip Jose Farmer’s To Your Scattered Bodies Go.

And speaking of the book club, I’ve decided to do things a little differently for the February selections. I’m going to devote a week to each of the three selections (feel free to weigh in with your comments on the week in question or anytime after the discussion begins). So -

February 18th: Discussion begins on Fast Forward 1: Future Fiction from the Cutting Edge, edited by Lou Anders. This collection of Hard SF stories is the perfect selection for those of you who have been sitting on the fence, uncertain about wading in. Pick and choose if you like. Comment on whichever stories catch your fancy. And come armed with questions or comments for editor Lou Anders who has kindly agreed to drop by and do a guest stint on this blog

February 25th: Smoke and Mirrors: Short Fictions and Illusions, by Neil Gaiman. For those of you who prefer the fantasy genre, this collection is another great starting point.

March 3rd: We’ll be discussing our horror pick, Children of the Night by Dan Simmons. I love the guy’s work and really enjoyed Summer of Night, so this one should be a lot of fun for fans of the genre.

I hope you’re reading at least one of the aforementioned titles!

PROGRAM ALERT! JUST RECEIVED THE FOLLOWING FROM PRISCILLA AT MGM -

“Tune-in this Friday, when EXTRA! airs a special SGA segment with host, Jerry Penacoli!”

Mailbag -

PG15 writes: “Do you guys do storyboarding?”

Answer: Yes, occasionally, for more complicating sequences, a director will storyboard the scene, sketching out it out shot by shot.

Squall78 writes: “Do you have any ratings info on “Quarantine”.”

Answer: The early returns have Quarantine matching Lifeline’s numbers.

Patricia writes: “So Joe ~~~ since you did not bother to give even a sarcastic answer to my inquiry about crashing on one of your puppy pillows for the April time frame I can only assume that it was a stupid inquiry to begin with.”

Answer: Sorry - Jelly asked me to ask you whether you snore.

Msstargate writes: “I enjoyed “Quarantined” immensely. However, critics around the net have been less than complimentary because (their words) it is a retread of an old Star Trek TNG episode.”

Answer: Which part? The part where the hero climbs up the side of the tower? The part where the character undermines not only his marriage proposal but his relationship? Or the part where the Czech scientist crawls through the vents in a race against time to turn off the self-destruct?

AscendedTauri writes: “Alison Porter…. hmm, interesting. Possibly the gate tech from Quarantine?”

Answer: No, you’re thinking of Amelia Banks.

Voodoolizzy writes: “Where will you watch the Superbowl?”

Answer: Don’t know yet. What’s your big screen like?

Talula writes: “I was thinking about joining my local Roller Derby. What do you think?”

Answer: I think you should join and then challenge our Stargate team. Marty G. is ruthless in the pivot position and Alex Levine is subbing for Carl as our jammer.

Zoniduck writes: “Hey, Joe. Watched the Vancouver edition of Anthony Bourdain’s “No Reservations” this evening, and I have to ask, have you ever tried a Japa Dog? Because they looked very, very tasty on the show, and Bourdain seemed to think so.

If you haven’t seen the show, he visited Tojo’s, Rangoli Restaurant, Sooke Harbor House, and Cioppino’s Mediterranean Grill, all of which looked delicious. I know Tojo’s is a favorite of yours, but have you ever eaten at any of the others?”

Answer: I have enjoyed Japan Dog. Haven’t been to Sookie Harbor House, but Tojo’s is my favorite sushi restaurant in the city (we’re going there tonight) Rangoli is also great - located right next door to Vij’s, one of my top 5 faves. Cioppino’s is fine too.

Alipeeps writes: “My completely unbiased opinion? Alison’s a great choice.”

Answer: Yeah, had a feeling you’d be on board.

Paul writes: “So is there anything we’re supposed to be doing to help Bam Bam get selected for Gladiators?”

Answer: Well, if you happen to know anyone on the selection committee, you could put in a good word for him.

LLB writes: “You said you only watch subbed anime. Why?”

Answer: In Japan, anime is a form of entertainment that can range from the amusingly childish (Crayon Shin-chan) to the cerebrally adult (Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex). There is a distinct difference between the various types of shows and those that fall into the more mature category are respected as such. The voice performances in the kid-oriented shows are fun and cartoonish while performances in the adult-themed shows are subtle and nuanced. Compare this to North America where “Cartoons are for kids!!!” and, given this mindset, the voice performances are always WAAAAAAY OOOOOVEEER THE TOOOOOOP! WAAAAAAAH!!! HOOOOHAAAAAAAH!!!!

Stefanie writes: “ I am wondering if you know who at MGM and/or Sci-Fi Channel I can get into contact with in order to ask about potential employment opportunities.”

Answer: Unfortunately, I can’t help you because we don’t deal with that part of the studio/network. Anyone?

Jean writes: “Have you read Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card? It’s a great book that I read many years ago, also the sequel Speaker for the Dead is good.”

Answer: Two very different but very good books.

Matt S. writes: “In general, do you pay attention to fan “ships” when creating pairings that some can read into as growing deeper (i.e. Ronan and Keller) or do you prefer to let these relationship grow naturally out of the stories the writers create?”

Answer: We didn’t go into season four with a definitive plan to ship certain characters although, prior to the news of Teyla’s pregnancy, we had considered the possibility of making Katie and Rodney unexpected parents. Of course, this storyline was scrapped in favor of the Teyla pregnancy. The Ronon-Keller scene came about as an idea we had at the beginning of the year, a remark that Keller certainly looked a lot like Ronon’s ex. As to whether we’ll be pursuing this or any other ship in season 5 - stay tuned.

DeeinSouthAfrica writes: “Joe, have you ever fallen over Max in the dark?”

Answer: No, because what I do is shuffle my feet when I walk to and from the bathroom early in the morning. And, yes, at some point or other I have shuffled into each of my dogs

OregonJen writes: “Are there any Colombian restaurants in Vancouver?”

Answer: Hmmm. There are a few Brazilian and Peruvian restaurants in town, but I can’t think of a Colombian restaurant.

Anonymous J writes: “Do you have the directors set for Season 5 yet?”

Answer: Yep. The first three on deck: Andy Mikita, Will Waring, and Ken Girotti.

DanielForever writes: “Several years ago (I think it was back during season Brad/Rob wanted to do a Stargate movie that was supposed to be a lost season 2 episode. […] What was the idea for the episode?”

Answer: I don’t believe there was a fleshed-out idea. It was simply going to be a “lost episode”, a one-off adventure that would have taken place sometime between SG-1’s 2nd and 3rd season.

Charly Kinder a ecrit: “Vos chiens sont pas trop jaloux ? Il me semble que les bouldogues sont de nature jalouse …”

Reponse: Ils sont tous jaloux

Sort of translation: All of my dogs are the jealous types.

Charly Kinder a aussi ecrit: “A propos de Lulu … a t’elle un fiancé ? car j’ai moi même un bouldogue ( 6 mois la semaine prochaine hiaaa)et il bave devant l’écran… “

Reponse: Lulu veut voir une image de son petit ami éventuel.

Sort of translation: Lulu has requested to see a pic of Charly’s bulldog - and her prospective new boyfriend.

Charly Kinder a aussi ecrit: “Etes vous retourner au restaurant Bistrot Bistro ?”

Reponse: Nous étions là il y a deux semaines. Délicieux !

Sort of translation: We went to Bistrot Bistro a couple of weeks ago. It was delicious.