Living Out the Gospel of the Kingdom

Help for Homeless Women in India

2008-12-28T18:54:00.006-05:00

Our friends over at Charis are working on a new project - helping homeless women in India.

They stand near small tea shops or walk aimlessly around the streets of Tenkari, India. They eat when someone gives them food and wear whatever old clothes are given to them. They sleep on other people’s verandahs or in old ruined buildings with no mats to lie on, no pillows for their heads, and no blankets to cover them on cold nights. They have no place to wash.
Who are they? They are destitute women who were once good wives and mothers. Many are from very poor families who lived a hand-to-mouth existence even before the death of their husbands. Now they have nothing and nowhere to live.
Some are on the streets because their children have moved away or are so poor themselves that they have nothing to give to their mothers. Others have been expelled from their homes because their daughters-in-law do not wish to share their food or homes with old mothers-in-law who have nothing to give in return.

To find out more about this project head over to the Charis projects page.

Prayer Insights pt. 2

2008-12-17T13:45:00.007-05:00

I've enjoyed reading David Crump's, Knocking on Heaven's Door and posted some insights it caused to rattled around inside my head. This is a follow-up to that.

4. Prayer shapes us into a more loving person.

Prayer, simply as a regular exercise, has a wonderful effect in focussing us on others and their welfare. It helps us break out of the tiny orbit of self preoccupation and think about others. We become more familiar with their challenges and needs. We start to widen our perspective and become more compassionate. If this was the only benefit of prayer it would be worth it. Our nature and fallen world dictate that we need a practical method to get off ourselves. Prayer provides that method by forcing our attention away from ourselves.

5. The best prayer we can pray for others is one for their highest welfare, which is always an increased awareness and confidence in God.

Once we're engaged in the business of praying for others, our petitions need to be aimed in the right direction. Our requests to God for others express our desire for their welfare. Simply, we want good for them. But more importantly, we should want their ultimate good. So while we may ask for the alleviation of suffering or the provision of some material desire, the real thing people need is greater confidence in God that will act as a supply for their true needs in all of life.

Crump makes this point:

“New Testament petition has a laser-like focus on the things that matter for eternity. Physical health is temporary. No one evades decrepitude or the grim reaper indefinitely, but prayerfully cultivating a grace-filled life in the face of disappointment, pain, and mortality reaps a harvest of eternal fruit that will feed more hungry souls than we can ever imagine, in more ways than we will ever know this side of paradise.”

This doesn't mean we don't care about the agony people have in life or temporal needs and desires. We will pray for these things because we love people and want to see them blessed in every way possible. But our great aim is to see people find ultimate good and that's where our best energy should be directed.

Again, Crump:

Ultimately, only the heavenly minded can be of any earthly good. The universe is our Father's good creation, but it is a distorted product, a cosmos groaning, waiting for release. Its final redemption occurs in a great conflagration. This world is not our final home. There is a tension here to be tightly grasped. Biblical eschatology never demands that we ignore life's injustices or withdraw from its painful realities. Loved ones will die, and we are right to grieve. Tragedy strikes, and we ought to pray for God's deliverance while doing everything we can to bring relief. Biblical eschatology does, however, require God's people to radically reprioritize their passions. Though we live in this world, any prayer life preoccupied with the concerns of this world is a life that has lost its way.

Knowing Christ and being conformed to His image is our ultimate good, and our best prayer for others. As Crump says, “Perhaps the greatest gift we can offer anyone is the prayer we make for their encouragement, guidance, patience, faith, peace of mind, conviction, repentance, or spiritual renewal.”

Schools For Conversion

2008-11-26T10:40:00.019-05:00

Recently a team from our community visited our friends out in Missouri at Shepherdsfield. Shepherdsfield is another intentional Christian community from whom we've learned much over the years. They invited us to participate in a “School For Conversion” which is a conference sponsored by the New Monasticism movement. It was enriching spending time again with fellow community dwellers and interacting with students investigating this life. Also present were members from the Little Portion community in Arkansas, and Tim Otto, a teacher with the New Monasticism and member of Church of the Sojourners community in San Francisco.

I was uplifted by the teachings and interaction with everybody. It's always fun to spend time with our friends from Shepherdsfield, but the added pleasure of meeting the students and community members from Little Portion and Church of the Sojourners made the weekend a highlight.

Here are the testimonies from the others that went:

Jared Barton

Having five different intentional communities experiences present at the School of Conversion brought out the truth that there is “one body, one Spirit…one God and Father of all, who is over all, and through all, and in all.”(Eph 4:2) This past weekend was a display of this eternal truth as representatives from five very different communities answered serious questions of the why’s and how’s of community life. I was moved in the spirit by many of the discussions as those in attendance asked meaningful, probing questions.

I so appreciated those in attendance and their desire to find answers. I walked away refreshed and revived in the value of community life and the truth that communities coming together is a powerful testimony and witness of the body principles.

Sarah Harding

I always feel privileged to spend time with our friends of the Shepherdsfield community in Missouri. Their individual and corporate stories inspire each one of us further along the “common way.” I don't think there has been a visit in which we have not gone away with a deeper appreciation for God's vision for the body of Christ.

During this particular visit, I spent time with the “Shepherdsfieldians” as they received others into their home to experience their dynamic life together. Visitors from overseas, Canada, and other regions of the Midwest came to see and hear what intentional Christian community looked like for this church in Fulton, Missouri. As guest speakers recounted the Biblical story from Abraham to Pentecost, listeners were invited to ask, “What is God's vision for his people as narrated in the Bible and what does that mean for the church today?” Some discussed the cost of following in Christ and the disciple's footsteps while others asked for insight to realize a practical lifetime commitment to a people. Between the experience of both resident members and those they invited, the advice shared was rich in wisdom from a road long traveled.

These discussions deeply rooted in me as I not only listened to the sessions but participated in the daily life of my hosts. The time spent eating excellent food, enjoying company, listening to music or pulling up my sleeves in the kitchen or greenhouse reminded me again and again of the “why” behind the vision we had been discussing. I believe the “why” behind what we do is ultimately personal, that our commitments are realized supremely because of the individual on our right or left hand. I've been more than blessed to have grown up in such a person-centered environment. I don't want to forget just how irreplaceable each individual in our life is.

Timothy Krell

My most cherished part of my trip to Shepherdsfield has to be the time I spent with my friend, Jeffrey. I met Jeffrey when I was eleven during my first trip to his community. The great distance that separates our two communities makes it difficult to interact much, so whenever one of us is visiting I value what time we can spend together. This visit was particularly special since Jeffrey's family hosted me, and I stayed with him in his room. It is very exciting to befriend someone who has been living in a Christian community similar to my own. We can relate to many of each others experiences, offer insight into each other's walk with the Lord, and share in the differences that make our respective communities unique.

Shepherdsfield has a very strong culture of socializing with each other, and this comes out in Jeffrey's openness and wonderful hospitality. One practice that Shepherdsfield uses to foster this spirit is their abstinence of TV watching in the home. They watch movies together as a group, but they have chosen not to watch broadcast television or movies each in their own home. The result of this, I have seen, is a very strong culture of fellowship and hosting of one another during their spare time. At the end of the day, people will invite others to their homes to sit, drink tea or coffee, play a game, and just talk with each other. Jeffrey's newly married older brother invited Sarah and I to his home Sunday afternoon. I had a wonderful time talking about our lives and sharing our interests. I confess that my default form of entertainment almost always involves a TV, whether it be playing a video game or watching something. My times with Shepherdsfield have helped me understand that what is most valuable and cherished is not the entertainment but the person.

Mankind Is Our Business

2008-11-20T10:52:00.011-05:00

In Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol the hesitant and barely chastened Scrooge, confronting the phantom that was his partner in life, tries to console the guilty and agonized ghost (and himself) with a feeble word of encouragement, “But you were always a good man of business, Jacob.” Immediately, the specter roars out with terrible force, “Business! Mankind was my business. The common welfare was my business; charity, mercy, forbearance, and benevolence, were, all, my business.”

I will never forget the first time I saw A Christmas Carol portrayed in film. While there has been numerous renditions of this beloved tale, I always cherish the black and white version staring Alastair Sim. The shadowy images, low-tech effects, and the incredible conversion scene win my heart every time. But what about my hands and feet? What will I do with this message?

The Hammonton Area Ministerium has partnered together each October for the last several years to participate in an event called, “Crop Walk.” This is a fund raising effort for the poor and needy. Participants walk a ten kilometer route as a way to identify with those who must make such a trek for their daily livelihood. This last year seven Hammonton area churches participated and raised over $2,500 for needs abroad and here at home. The Ministerium uses a part of these donations to fund local food pantries and provide emergency assistance to those in our own town. The remainder of donations go toward relief efforts around the world.

In our small way we are making mankind our business. It won't solve the world's problems, and we can do so much more. But like Scrooge, after seeing the darkness and futility of selfishness, we can take small, but sure, steps towards love. This holiday season, let's all make mankind our business.

Prayer Insights pt. 1

2008-10-30T14:01:00.006-04:00

As my last few posts reveal, I've been reading David Crump's book, Knocking on Heaven's Door. I've been enjoying the book and want to share some insights I've had while reading it.

1. Prayer's primary purpose is communion with God.

Prayer isn't just a means to get our needs met. It's not a heavenly drive-through where we shout our requests at a crackling speaker. Prayer is talking and listening to God. It is the communication conduit with Him. It's the way we get to know Him. It's all about relationship.
Imagine talking to your friend or spouse the way we talk to God in prayer sometimes: “Honey, my wonderful wife, thank you for your blessings. Please cook spaghetti tonight for dinner. Help me with our taxes, and show our children the need to clean their room. Amen.” Of course, it is fine and right to share our needs and desires with God, but the real point is contact and presence with Him. He is the object of our love, not His gifts.

2. Prayer isn't magic, therefore, it isn't formulaic.

Messages on “The Secrets of Prayer,” or “How to Get Your Prayers Answered,” or “Prevailing with God,” often talk about prayer like a magic spell. If you can just learn the secret formula then you can become an effective prayer warrior. The problem is that this treats prayer and God mechanistically. Many of these messages were popular during the Industrial Revolution and reflected the mechanistic view of life at the time. Civilization was inspired by the advances of the machine and the tendency was to try to explain all of life through this paradigm, including prayer.

The Biblical paradigm, however, is relationship. Jesus taught us to pray, “Our Father.” All of the principles that govern relationships apply: respect, freedom, trust, honesty, and humility. Once we begin to try to use a formula we move from communion to manipulation. Manipulation, by its very definition, is anti-personal and anti-relational. God is not a thing to be handled and managed. He is a person, the most wonderful Person in the universe. Prayer is spending time in fellowship with this Person.

3. Authenticity is what matters, not zeal, passion, persistence, or “great faith.”

Crump does a good job dissecting those biblical passages that on the surface seem to teach that long-term repetition + sufficient fervency = positive result. It's not that zeal, passion, or persistency are irrelevant, but they aren't tools or good works to obtain answers in prayer. Remember, everything has to be seen through a relationship paradigm. Right relationships require that we be real and sincere. It's a matter of motive. If my real agenda is to get something, not know and love the other person, then I am treating them as an object, a living vending machine.

Zeal, passion, and persistency make sense when, in the natural course of life, they express who we are as persons facing the situations we face. They can't be mustered up and used as magic tokens to get our needs and desires met by God. When people face real problems that have potentially serious consequences they feel passion and have urgent focus. Prayer born out of these kind of experiences is going to reflect that passion and focus. It is simply natural, human, and authentic.

A word on faith: Crump points out that James defines, “asking in faith,” as the opposite of doubt or double-mindedness. He says, “Doubt is not weakness in faith but the attempt to maintain faith in two different things at once – hence, to be double minded.” So, there aren't levels of faith in prayer, with the idea that the greater the faith the more likely you will be answered. Rather, doubt simply means you are not authentically trusting in God's character and therefore are not being sincere in your relationship with Him. It's binary, not analog (sorry my geekness is coming out). The key here is to resolve this conflict in your relationship with God through repentance.

Prayer is an important part of community. In my next post I'll share other insights I've been getting from reading this wonderful book.

The Best Answer to Prayer

2008-10-20T16:10:00.002-04:00

“The best answer to every prayer is an expanded awareness of how the Father's unconditional love, experienced here and now as well as anticipated in his eternal promises, is all we require to sustain us through life.”

Knocking on Heaven's Door

2008-10-02T13:47:00.006-04:00

Knocking on Heaven's Door, besides being a song by Bob Dylan and performed by Guns N' Roses (and others), is a wonderful book by David Crump on prayer. Probably no other book on prayer has affected my idea and practice of prayer like this book.

One of the main points I've been taking away from my reading is the idea that prayer isn't a "petition machine." Crump dispels the idea that prayer is formulaic and can be mastered in order to guarantee results. Rather, prayer is the avenue of communion with our loving God. In other words, prayer must be seen in a relational context.

How would it feel if your friend approached you only to make requests, and would employ methods of earnestness and persistence to gain his desire? You would feel manipulated, wouldn't you? In the same way, prayer can be egocentric and devoid of communion.

Crump writes:

“Prayer, regardless of its specific content, creates an open channel of two-way communication between heaven and earth. Not only is the Father the recipient of our messages, but prayer opens us simultaneously to his.”

Once again, everything goes back to relationship and communion. It's all about imitating the Trinity in their loving union. God invites us into this fellowship of love, and prayer is the way to enter in.

I've never heard Dylan's song, but I have knocked on heaven's door many times.

Surprise

2008-09-19T16:33:00.003-04:00

On my birthday I came into my office to find this. Heidi and the kids from the community really brightened my day with fun jokes and lots of love.

Community as commodity

2008-09-05T14:16:00.004-04:00

Community is something most people desire. It is so desirable that it is often used to promote and sell all kinds of things. In fact, it is treated as a commodity. But true community isn't something that can be obtained like a consumer good. It requires deep commitment and sincerity. I was excited to find someone else talking about this very thing the other day. Benjamin Sternke's post about “Community as commodity” captures so many good points I decided to publish it here. Enjoy!

A blog post by David Fitch a few days ago provoked some thoughts for me on the way we bandy the word "community" about.

Everyone loves the idea of community. It's used to market all kinds of things (including churches!), and it works because people are lonely. We've spent the last 200 years asserting our individual right to privacy, and now we find that we're starved for community (coincidence?).

But while everyone loves the idea of community, we also tend to think that it is something we can get the same way we get breakfast cereal. We want community as a commodity: something we can go pick up at the church store when we feel like it. But then if things get too serious or "heavy," we can always go back to asserting our right to privacy.

The problem is that community is not a commodity. We can't just grab some community when we feel like it, like a hamburger. We can't just walk into a church and expect that "community" will happen automatically because we'd like it to. True community takes a lot of time and effort, and it can't be condensed into a convenient package that fits your lifestyle. Community requires deep commitment. True community means that others have a "say" about how you live your life and spend your time. It means people will be relying on you to fulfill your responsibilities, and will probably be upset if you don't. It means laying down your "right" to privacy and realizing that others are going to know the real you. It means taking the huge risk of being known.

Community isn't just one more thing we can consume when it suits our fancy. It's not a commodity. It entails huge commitment and breathtaking risk. But the rewards are greater than the risks.

Welcome Aimee

2008-08-29T11:17:00.004-04:00

Bret and Gretchen's new addition, Aimee, came to live among us on August 7th at 7:59 a.m.. She arrived a healthy 7 pounds 3 ounces and 20 1/4 inches bundle of joy. Mom, dad, brothers, grandparents, and all her aunts and uncles in community could not be more delighted!

Money, money, money

2008-08-21T10:45:00.003-04:00

As a common purse community we're often asked if we believe that every Christian should live like we do. Does the Bible require every Christian to "hold all things in common?" The short answer to that is, of course, “No.” It is not practical or possible for every Christian to be a part of a income sharing structure. Some Christians are married to unbelievers, some are in a stage of their life that makes this kind of commitment not permissible (like being in the armed services), and others just don't have the faith (the necessary level of maturity and understanding) or calling (God may not be directing) to live like this. On top of this, one must be able to find a group of Christians they trust enough to share in this way.

This doesn't mean, however, that the Bible has nothing to say about how we approach our finances. David Crump, in Knocking on Heaven's Door, writes how the Lord's Prayer teaches us to live for the honor, praise, and glory of God which includes how we handle our finances:

“The Lord's Prayer does not require anyone to become a neo-Marxist, a socialist, or even a vegetarian who recycles. The fourth petition [“Give us this day our daily bread”] does not impose a particular political agenda or economic philosophy; it simply requires that one's material existence be utterly conditioned by the reign of God. Followers of Jesus are to hold on to nothing as tightly as they hold on to their King, and when it comes time to act on their stated values – as it does for all of us every day – they will go anywhere and do anything the Father asks, regardless of the cost, because they know that he will faithfully supply their needs.”

Wanting to love God and our brethren with all our hearts and live out the Sermon on the Mount, we have chosen to create a structure that enables us to share with each other our needs and blessings. Through this we hope to embody, in our small way, the vision of the coming Kingdom. God calls every Christian to find a way, within their means, to do the same.

What is Discipleship?

2008-08-06T13:06:00.005-04:00

Discipleship - Allowing God to make us capable of communion.

Looking Back

2008-08-01T11:36:00.003-04:00

Working with friends in Mexico.

The Other End of the Stick

2008-07-24T16:29:00.002-04:00

When we make decisions how do we know what is the right choice? As Christians our decisions should be based in principle rather than emotion. This is what the Scriptures refer to as walking according to the Spirit rather than according to the flesh (Rom. 8:4-8). When we are living by the Spirit, in communion with God and oriented around Him and His ways, we are living according to reality. Jesus is the truth, and when we regard Him we regard the truth. From God comes reality and when we've been converted we're converted to live according to reality, according what is real and true.

The flesh is sensory and emotion based. It is impulsive, short-term, feeling oriented. Making decisions based on how we feel or what seems pleasant to us at the moment, without regard to long and short term consequences, is walking according to the flesh. And according to the Bible, making decisions that way is death (Rom. 8:6).

The challenge then is to understand wisdom principles and rightly discern the consequences of our choices. We are free to make any decision we want, however, there are consequences associated with every decision and we are not free to determine them. Consequences are determined by the natural laws that govern the universe, which has been created by God. They are immovable and inevitable, whether we agree with them or not, whether we like them or not. You don't have to agree with the concept of gravity, but if you step out of a window of a 12 story building, you will learn very quickly that your opinion matters very little. A choice is like picking up a stick, when you pick up the one end you pick up the other. Consequences follow our choices just like the one end of the stick follows the other.

To that end I've developed a worksheet that helps link choices with the consequences of those choices. To use the worksheet fill in the one side with the choice you are considering. Then fill in the other side with all the possible short and long term consequences of that choice. Then in the box next to each consequence put the percentage of chance that consequence will likely happen. If you end up giving high percentages to most of the consequences then it shows you are making an informed decision. If, on the other hand, the percentages are low, you may be mistaken about what will result from this choice. To further the accuracy, you can give a copy of the paper without the percentages filled in to someone you trust and have them fill in the percentages and then compare them to yours. The Bible says there is safety in a multitude of counsel (Prov. 24:6). It is often helpful to have someone who is distant from the situation, and more objective, to review our thinking.

You can find the worksheet here.

To Love Is To Be Broken

2008-07-10T11:39:00.007-04:00

A few nights ago I was looking at old videos of some of our activities and celebrations together. Seeing Karen in them made me very sad. At times I really miss her. I struggle with being tempted to go into my previous state of crushing grief. I sometimes can't believe this has happened. But then I think of the lessons I've been learning: the preciousness of my friends and family and the privilege of being fully present for them, the reality that God does not spare His children from life in this world (John 17:15), and the hope of the resurrection.

I guess it's normal to go through these waves of recurring grief and wrestling with the problem of evil. These lyrics from Phil Keaggy's “Chalice” have given me some light during this time:

The way to find our selves is in the fires of our sorrow
Do we look around, expect to see the wind?
Could we prevent the trials that we face with each tomorrow?
Can't we see this is the world were living in?

When suffering restores us, burns away the empty shallowness
And softening the heart,
To be broken bread and poured out wine.
When it rains it pours, turns a life into a chalice;
There to nourish every soul one at a time.

And when I wonder if the pain could have been avoided by simply not forming such close relationships, brother Phil tells us this:

To love is to be broken, but to love nothing and no one,
We must close our own selves up, shut all the doors
And let no one in.
Locked within ourselves where it's safe and dark and motionless
Where love will cease to be
And all the while the air is wearing thin…

Relationships are what life (and the Kingdom of God) is all about. To pursue a life of superficiality is to reject the mission of God and to resign ourselves to a life of breathing our own air.

A Pietistic Approach to the Bible

2008-07-03T15:49:00.003-04:00

Some time ago, I blogged about “truth versus pietism.” The dividing of life into the secular and the sacred results in all kinds of problems and seriously undermines our Christian walk. Understandably, therefore, I was excited to read the following passage from Robert Webber's book, Ancient-Future Worship:

“The [early church] fathers did not see life as a split between the sacred and the secular. For them everything is sacred. In the Greek mind-set, which I reject, prayer and a relationship to God constitute the sacred part of life separate from work, fun, marriage, or relationships, which constitute the secular part of life. This approach sets aside moments to 'get alone with God.' However, the ancient, biblical mind-set sees the whole day and indeed all of life-work, fun, marriage, and relationships-as the realm of the sacred. God is everywhere, at all places, in all times. There is no escaping the presence of God, for God's Spirit is the one who gives life to all of life.”

The context of this passage is Webber explaining how to read, understand, and preach the Bible. Webber says, “God is not an absent, ethereal essence who sits in the sky and demands worship. God is the God who acts, who lives and moves and has his being in the world and among the people. Affirm that all of life, not just part of life, is sacred. Affirm that God is disclosed in every detail of human existence. Then, stand inside the Bible and God's story and let it teach you to look out into the creation where God is signified everywhere yet particularized in Jesus, the ultimate icon of God.”

It's amazing how pietism has even affected our approach to the Scriptures. Since thinking about these things, we've been trying to read the Bible differently and consciously order our worship and life around the narrative of God. A large part of this has been to incorporate liturgy into our services and orient our schedule around the Christian calendar. Rather than just reading the Bible devotionally, we now follow the lectionary, which helps us enter into the divine narrative. It also has led us to celebrate the Lord's Supper weekly.

Reading the Bible Relationally

2008-06-26T13:25:00.006-04:00

Reading Robert Webber's, Ancient-Future Worship, is a inspiration and pleasure. I'm particularly enjoying how he is shaping my approach to the Scriptures. We have a strong emphasis on relationships here (being a community after all) and our theology and practices reflect this. Webber doesn't disappoint in this regard either:

“To stand within the Bible and under it, we must also read the Bible relationally. The Hebrew mind does not describe God intellectually in the abstract as though God is an object to be studied. Instead he is always pictured as the God who enters into a relationship with his creatures. Whether we are standing alongside Adam and Eve, Noah, Abraham and Sarah, Moses and Miriam, David and the kings, or Isaiah and the prophets, God is always visualized in relationship.”

I'm constantly seeing that dramatic changes will take place in our lives when we move from a legal understanding of the gospel to a relational one. Not the least will be how we read and understand the Bible.

Forming Community

2008-06-10T15:34:00.005-04:00

The following is the answer to an email I received asking about us and how to take steps to form a mission community. I get this question on occasion and so I thought it would be good to post my answer here.

Our community began as a number of us were involved in missions. About half of us were involved in missionary work oversees and in urban settings, but based out of here in NJ. In the late 80s there was a renewal movement of God in our ranks that awakened us to our need for a deeper experience of Christ. We had always been big on commitment to Him and to His work, but through this time of revival He started to convict us about our commitment to His people. We were very involved in evangelism and ministry to the poor and needy, but we felt a lack when it came to living out the truths of the gospel among ourselves. That's when we felt God was leading us to "throw our hats in the ring" together and begin to share finances and truly take liability for one another as brothers and sisters in Christ. We now see the Christian life as a total commitment to Christ, His people, and His work.

Community is basically about being in love with God and each other. It can't be for something, just like a marriage can't be for something. Your marriage is its own justification. It's part of God's will and a good in and of itself. You're not committed to "marriage" you're committed to your wife. You love her. She is important in her own right. Your love together has meaning. So with community, the church is God's will and is a good in and of itself. We don't commit to "community" we commit to real, tangible, wonderful, and flawed people in the community. They are important enough for me to commit my entire life to them. And just like marriage, out of that love children are produced, namely, ministering to the lost and needy. The love for each other overflows to the world around you. It would be unhealthy to marry for the express purpose of having children. Children are a part of marriage, but not the reason for it. They are a natural consequence of a couple's love. So, reaching out to the world around us should be a natural consequence of the love of the brethren. Some think that ecclesiolgy is a subcategory of missiology. I think that is incorrect. Missiology is a natural consequence of ecclesiology.

I keep coming back to this thought: whenever I think of our work or the community in general I remember that it's really about the specific people in our community, not about some ideal. I must have a zeal for them, for their welfare, for their uniqueness, for them as my friends. If I don't have this, I truly believe I don't have a whole lot to offer in the way of spirituality. My experience has been as I've traveled quite extensively in the church is that the one thing that seems to be the hardest to do is radical commitment to other brothers and sisters. People will go to the end of the earth and live in crushing poverty, they'll give lots of money, they'll do almost anything than fully pour out their life for another brother or sister. Commitment in the church just doesn't seem that important. But the truth is, it is the key thing God is trying to do in the world and that's why it is so aggressively opposed by Satan.

Once that issue is clearly settled (and that's not an easy thing) then consideration of how to touch the world around us can be done with clarity. As we incarnate in the world we have something to point to, "Hey, this kingdom of love and healing...look this way (pointing to the community), it's kind of like this. See how we love one another, see the lack of competition, see the acceptance, see the care for one another...that's what we're talking about." The mustard seed of the gospel becomes a large tree that the birds of air (the poor and needy around you) take refuge in. Can this be done in the suburbs? Absolutely. Can it be done in an urban setting? Very much so. It can be done anywhere. It's all a matter of God's particular guidance for you as a group. But the focus isn't the field, it's the harvesters.

One last thought on this: In order for a community to thrive, the leadership must be the best of friends. They must really like each other, love each other, respect each other, and "throw away the key" commit to each other. I can't emphasize that enough.

Goodbye

2008-06-02T15:02:00.004-04:00

Unlocking the door while juggling my laptop and thermos, I wrestled the keys out of the lock and entered our dimly lit office. The morning sun crept through the blinds giving the room a warm, tranquil feeling. Spring was in full bloom which normally would fill the day's labor with an energy that could mitigate any stress from our work. Soon my co-workers would arrive, but today I knew that one chair would be empty. Karen, my friend and assistant of twenty years, passed away at the end of the previous week. Even the beauty of spring could not wield its magic against my aching grief.

So began the torturous process of dealing with her absence. Besides being the best man at Tim and Karen's wedding, Karen and I worked so closely together over these last twenty years that she truly felt like the sister I never had. The challenges we faced together created a deep camaraderie. Now I had to face the loss of a key staff member without the help of the very person who normally I would rely on in a situation like this. Tackling it would be made worse by having to sort though the notes and work of my friend, each page and file reminding me of her absence. After a while, it seemed like the grief would never end.

It's very hard, however, to resist the beauty of spring. Each blossom, bird, and fragrance subverts the gloom that seeks to rule over me. Its magic has power after all. And more magic yet seduces me; the laughter of my friends, the innocent joys of my children, and the love of my wife. Each compels me to conclude that there is too much good to wallow in sorrow.

Raking over Karen's emails, notebooks, and files I'm reminded of my loss. But, unexpectedly, I also remember a myriad of wonderful things about her: that incredible smile, her tenacious faith, the attention to detail, and her warm spirit. I realize that the loss of the good should never overshadow the good that was. Life moves on and things change. Each season gives way to another. We shouldn't curse this inevitability and stubbornly cry about what is lost. Children grow up, leaves change colors, and people die. The wonder of what was should never be crushed by the change that will and must come.

So goodbye my dear friend. You made a difference.

Thanks

2008-05-22T14:03:00.037-04:00

Since Karen's passing we have been surrounded by an outpouring of love and support from friends and family. Tim and the boys are being held up by this love and the blessing of community. From homework to doctor's visits to hugs, the members are filling the gaps left from Karen's absence. She is irreplaceable, but God's supply is abundant. She was a remarkable and capable women. We miss her so much. My long-time friend, Brian, called her, "The friendly voice of Life Mission to the world." She was that indeed!

So many have helped us during this difficult time. Our friends from the National Christian Conference Center came to the memorial service and arranged the food. Marilyn Kobus, donated several sandwich trays and friends from Shepherdsfield sent an overnight box of their incredible home-made baked goods. Megan made the memorial service program and Heidi put much love into the picture boards of Karen's life. Sarah made the video that was shown at the service and Brittany made the slide show above.

Mike and Ginger Papantonakis were comforting parents to us all during our grief, and, with Mary Jo and Aunt Bee, made several meals for us right after Karen's death. Three of Tim's brothers and their wives came for overnight stays to comfort Tim and the boys. Also, Tim's brother from Germany has posted on his blog his condolences and thoughts. Alec Brooks, our friend and mentor, flew in and helped in so many ways. Karen's childhood pastor, Pastor Bowen, wonderfully shared about her at the service, also.

Quite a few people attended the memorial service. That itself was a testament of how many people Karen's life touched. Numerous calls and cards have come in as well as donations towards the memorial garden we'll be making in Karen's memory.

I want to share some of the comments of love and support we've received.

"Karen was so welcoming and caring, truly Christ-like. We will miss her."

"We are richer for having known Karen and the intimate place that she will always hold in all of your hearts. Your life together whispers of a better one yet to come."

"Our hearts go out to you and we pray that God will meet all your needs. What a beautiful soul Karen was! Thank you, Lord for her life."

"We have been blessed by Karen's joy, excitement and faith that has encouraged us over the years here in [mission field omitted]! She has been a faithful saint in the community there, a real champion for the Lord's work!"

"No words can express the sorrow that has pierced our hearts. Karen will be sorely missed."

"We grieve with you at the loss of such a dear, sweet spirit. There are no words sufficient to comfort; but praise God that you are all connected to the God of all comfort!"

"I have such wonderful memories of Karen. She was always a true and loving friend. What a pleasure to have these memories and to have Karen as a friend! I appreciate her passion for Christ and others. What a beautiful example of Christ she was to everyone. She was a beautiful person inside and out."

"What a lovely expression of Christ's love and nature your Karen was. She was so full of fun and love."

"It is comforting to know that Karen's excitement for, support of, and gladsome exuberance in community life has more than prepared her for the 'community life' which is Heaven - there she is as one of the 'great cloud of witnesses' urging you and all of us to perfect on earth the Image of what she is now experiencing in the Presence of her Blessed Lord and Redeemer."

If you would like to post a memory or thought about Karen you can leave a comment at her memorial blog.

We're longing for the day when our Lord reunites us with our beloved sister. Maranatha!

Sunshine Personified

2008-05-13T12:55:00.005-04:00

The following is the meditation I was privileged to share at Karen's memorial service. Sarah Harding made the video which also was shown at the service. Karen was precious to us. We will miss her dearly.

Today was a brilliantly sunny day and I couldn't help but think of Karen. She was sunshine personified. How do you comprehend someone as wonderful as Karen? To really understand Karen's life, you have to understand the gospel, because that's what she lived for.

But the gospel is understood differently by people. Some see the gospel as a way to get one's sins forgiven. Another sees the gospel as a way to get to heaven. Still others see the gospel as a philosophy of life or ideology or a message to spread. While it may be some of those things, none of those truly capture the full meaning of the gospel. The gospel is good news. But what kind of good news? Is it simply good news about not going to hell?

The gospel is good news that God is fixing what is broken about mankind. It's good news that God loves people and wants to heal us and make us whole. He wants to see mankind again find happiness, love, and warmth in our relationships with Him and each other. And the good news is that He is making a way for this to become a reality - the New Creation. The gospel is first and foremost about the restoration of community.

I keep coming back to this thought: whenever I think of our work here I remember that it's really about the specific people in our community, not about some ideal. I must have a zeal for them, for their welfare, for their uniqueness, for them as my friends. If I don't have this, I truly believe I don't have a whole lot to offer in the way of spirituality.

My experience has been as I've traveled quite extensively in the church is that the one thing that seems to be the hardest to do and the most neglected is radical commitment to other brothers and sisters. People will go to the end of the earth and live in crushing poverty, they'll give lots of money, they'll do almost anything other than fully pour out their life for another brother or sister. Commitment in the church just doesn't seem that important. But the truth is, it is the key thing God is trying to do in the world and that's why it is so aggressively opposed by Satan.

The church is a foretaste of the New Creation. As a church we are to model now the kind of relationships that will characterize the New Creation. That's the key to understanding Karen's life.

Butch told us about Karen's life and said, “Karen loved God and people. Her smile brought joy to everyone she met. She tirelessly served people. She enjoyed birding, music, and reading, but her greatest joy was knowing, loving and serving people.” Karen's life reflected the gospel message. She bet her life on the gospel. It was worth it to her. She lived that future reality in the now. The New Creation was dawning in Karen's every action. Karen answered the prayer we pray every morning: Thy Kingdom come Thy will be done on earth as in heaven. She had caught a vision of this kingdom of love, believed in it, lived it, worked to bring it about. Karen lived this way and fully expected to keep living this way for all of eternity, and that thrilled her.

Karen's life spoke. It pointed to a future hope. Her life gently urges us to rethink our priorities. What's worth living for? What matters? Ambitions do not matter. Material possessions do not matter. Reputation does not matter. People matter. Real people. Specific people. In the end only relationships matter.

What can it profit a man to gain the whole world and lose his own soul? This isn't about going to heaven and avoiding hell. This is about missing the thing that matters most in this universe, the thing that makes us human, the thing that gives meaning to human existence. Our soul is the center of who we are. We were made for relationships, for love, for friendship. If we center on things, center on career, center on achievements, we lose our soul.

God is all about love, about community, about people - knowing them, loving them, and serving them. The gospel is about the restoration of a community of mankind in love with the Trinity and with each other. It's good news that God is creating a place where His family can be happy, healthy, and whole; a place where we can know, love, and serve each other – for therein is true joy.

Karen awaits us for the dawning of that New Creation. If she could be here now she would smile that incredible smile, and let us know that with Jesus she is making a place for us in that new New Creation.

Memorial

2008-05-08T18:59:00.005-04:00

Karen, my close friend, went to be with the Lord on May 1st. Her memorial service was one of the hardest and most beautiful things I've ever experienced. Tim, her husband, movingly shared about her life and his love for her. He also read letters from their sons. He wanted me to share what they said.

TIM

Karen and I met here in September 1984 when we were both students. As I got to know her, I was drawn to her by the warmth of her personality, her love and concern for others, but most of all her deep desire to follow Jesus and to know what Jesus meant when he promised to give life and life more abundant to those who followed him.

At the end of our year of training, Karen and I each felt led of God to join the staff. Soon after, we went through a time of renewal and testing that refined our lives, deepened our commitments, and bound us together with others in relationships that grew to become this Fellowship. These experiences strengthened the friendship that Karen and I had, but it was not until 1992 that we were attracted to each other at a deeper level and we began to pray about God’s will for our lives together. Once we were convinced that it was God’s will for us marry, we moved ahead quickly and on January 23, 1993, we were married.

In August of 1995, we were blessed with the arrival of Jordan, and in October 1997, we had the further blessing of welcoming Derek to our family. The boys were a source of joy to Karen and will continue to be so to me. I know they will grow up to be young men she would be proud of.

Marriage to Karen was an adventure, because of the kind of person she was. Through her, I learned more of what it means to love another person and what it means for a couple to love Jesus together. I learned so much from Karen and she gave so much to me, but the most important thing was that she drew me into a deeper love for Jesus so that we not only grew in our love for each other but in our love for him.

But Karen’s love extended beyond our marriage and family. She cared deeply for her mom, her dad, and her sister. When her dad died, she felt the loss keenly and sought to be a source of comfort and support to her mother. She also loved Life Mission Fellowship. She loved this place and its purpose, but most of all she loved the people who are part of it. They were not just her friends, they were her larger family. And in the days since Karen’s death, it is the love of this family for Karen and the boys and me that has surrounded and carried me every step of this painful part of our life together. We are discovering in new deeper ways what it means to love and care for each other. For this, I will always be grateful.

Karen had always enjoyed good health, so when she began to experience some physical problems in the last week or two, we were not unduly concerned. She did, however, consult with her primary care giver and her gynecologist to find out what might be the cause. The tests they administered gave no indication of a life-threatening problem. She was given medication for the headaches she was experiencing. This provided some relief, but at times they were so severe nothing seemed to help. Then on Wednesday, the headaches increased and she became quite ill. I called her doctor who told me to take her to the emergency room at the hospital. Adam, Butch and I took her to the local hospital immediately, where, after examination, she was admitted. At that time, I thought she was going to be all right, but blood tests showed that she had a blood borne disease, and a Cat Scan revealed that she had suffered a series of what the doctor called wet strokes resulting in significant brain damage. Because of the seriousness of her condition, she was medivaced to Cooper hospital in Camden where further tests were done. A second Cat Scan revealed massive bleeding in her brain and the head of the critical care unit told me that there was nothing more that could be done, because of the damage to Karen’s brain and that she was in fact, brain dead. We then learned that the cause of all of this was leukemia.

I was privileged to have shared 15 of the best years of my life with Karen. I had hoped that it would have been 50. That is not to be.

Death has taken her from us, but though our relationship to Karen has changed it has not ended. She is closer to Jesus now than she has ever been. And her love and her life will continue to be with us.

Thank you all for coming. Your being here is a further testimony to the ways in which the beautiful flower that was Karen touched your lives.

JORDAN

What I love about Mom.

Mom was always so loving and helpful. She would always remind us to do the things we needed to do. She was helpful when last year I was having trouble with math. She kept on trying to help me. Now this year I am doing better at math. At night mom was also very loving. She would always have time to say good night to me, and she would try to read to us as many times each week at night as possible. Mom was giving and would do things to please us. She would let us play football, or Starcraft. Mom was also very creative in skits or costumes. She would help make or come up with good skits or costumes. Mom was a very wonderful mother who always loved us and tried to help me.

DEREK

What I remember about Mom

Mom was the best mom in the world. She was caring for me when I was sick, hurt, or sad. Mom was fun joining in skits and playing games. She was loving to people in the community, people she met, and me. Mom was creative in making costumes and planning skits. She was busy but always answered my questions. Mom was always faithful towards other people and towards God. I enjoyed it when she would read books to my family and draw with me. Mom was always self-giving to other people, but most of all she was my loving parent. I am going to miss my mom's fun, faithfulness, cheerfulness, self-givingness, but most of all love.

Our Friend Has Gone Home

2008-05-03T10:43:00.003-04:00

Karen Niles, an original member and dearest friend, died on Thursday, May 1st, Ascension Day. Unexpectedly, she had a rapid onset of leukemia that resulted in multiple strokes. She was 43 and is survived by her husband, Tim, and two boys, Jordan and Derek. We loved her beyond words. She was an incredibly kind and giving person and she loved God completely. Our loss is great, but she is now in the presence of our Lord and awaits us for the dawning of the New Creation.

Please pray for us during this difficult time.

Karen M. Niles age 43 of Hammonton, passed away May 1, 2008. Karen was born and raised in Wilmington, DE. After high school she attended University of Delaware for 1 year, she received missionary training at Hammonton based Life Mission Training Center in 1984. Her charitable work took her to Mexico, Guatemala, El Salvador, the Philippines, U.S. Virgin Islands and various U.S. locations. She served in a variety of capacities during her 24 years with Life Mission, mainly focusing on administration, worship and hospitality. Karen loved God and people. Her smile brought joy to everyone she met. She tirelessly served people. She enjoyed birding, music, and reading, but her greatest joy was loving, serving, and knowing people. Her absence has left a giant hole in the life and hearts of her family and friends. Her presence will always be felt as she now lives out her life before the face of God. Karen is survived by her husband Timothy Niles, her sons Jordan and Derek at home, her mother Helen Wolfe and her sister Kathy Saffouri. Family and friends are invited to attend her viewing Tues. eve 5:00pm with services at 7:30pm at Life Mission Fellowship, 111 8th St Hammonton. Donations may be made in lieu of flowers to Life Mission Fellowship (PO Box 467 Hammonton, NJ 08037) for the creation of a memorial garden in Karen's memory. Arrangements by Marinella Funeral Home Hammonton 609-561-1311 (www.marinellafuneralhome.com).

Hearts Unfold Like Flowers

2008-04-29T12:57:00.008-04:00

Spring has sprung and we are enjoying the lovely blossoms. Singing Joyful, Joyful this morning in our devotions, I had fresh appreciation for the words, "Hearts unfold like flowers before Thee." God's loveliness opens our hearts and changes us.

Joyful, joyful, we adore thee,
God of glory, Lord of love;
hearts unfold like flowers before thee,
opening to the sun above.
Melt the clouds of sin and sadness;
drive the dark of doubt away.
Giver of immortal gladness,
fill us with the light of day!

Redemptive Forgiveness

2008-04-24T13:58:00.007-04:00

Recently I've been thinking about forgiveness. In community there are many opportunities to practice forgiveness. Alec Brooks, who visits us from time to time, shared with us this last week on this very topic. His message was a blessing to us and confirms the things we were seeing about forgiveness. The main idea is that forgiveness is not a duty that devoted Christians must do, but a natural expression of a life of grace. The key is seeing everything in terms of relationships versus having a legal outlook.

Here are a few quotes from Alec's messages (they may not be exact quotes):

Forgiveness transforms people. If we treat forgiveness legally it's over in a moment. Forgiveness is not about getting the slate wiped cleaned, it's about transforming our relationships.

It's never about spiritual bookkeeping. It's about the grace of God which is personal and relational.

The primary image for forgiveness is manifesting and sharing redemptive grace. Grace is about intended well-being for the other. To forgive someone is to intend them good. The grace I've received I extend to you.

Forgiveness takes the person seriously and values the person. It says that I want to be in relation to you and I'm willing to pay the cost so our relationship can be restored.

You can download and listen to his messages here:

Forgiveness part 1
Forgiveness part 2
Forgiveness part 3