AshleyNotes

Birthday Dinner!

2009-12-19T17:48:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday to me!!

It's the most wonderful time of the year!!

2009-12-16T08:51:00.000-08:00

Yesterday....
•Slept through my alarm
•Failed at finding red tights at target.
•My camera battery died.
•On my way to retrieve my charger, I fell in a river. Twice.
•Took my nephews to the zoo, set up their stroller (actually nate did), coaxed them out of their warm carseats into the frigid outdoors. Got them in the stroller and bundled. We were then informed that the amazing zoo fun is only open on weekends until next week.
•Couldn't sleep from 2:33 to 4:51 a.m. (that was technically this morning)

Today... (so far anyway).

•Watched Christmas movies from 2:33 to 4:51 a.m.

•Slept until 8 a.m. (on purpose)
•Remembered it's my birthday week.

•Got decked out in Christmas wear (including earrings that ring)

•Found red tights at Walmart.

•The sun is shining.

•Made it to work, to find that everyone else (mostly anyway) is decked out in Christmas wear too!

•Walked into the lobby to see many beautiful decorations.

•Cried. (In a good way)

•My friend, Eric noticed my excitement and proceeded to cover my eyes and walk me into the big kahuna of decorations... The Loft.

•Cried again.

•My earrings haven't embarrassed me yet....

We'll see how the rest of today goes....

The Drop Album...

2009-12-14T19:35:00.000-08:00

Check it out.... the first song was recorded at my birthday dinner a year ago. the rest is just icing.

http://www.wcrossing.org/drop/

Christmas Wishes....

2009-12-09T13:47:00.000-08:00

Christmas Wishes! (because "christmas list" sounds materialistic)

I wish for a puppy and a vacuum.

I wish for a job for my sweet husband.

I wish to lose 15 pounds.

I wish for a new ipod.

I wish for clean water throughout the world.

I wish I didn't cry every day at 4:00 p.m.

I wish for boldness when I scuba dive.

I really do wish I could have a puppy.

Finally, I wish someone would teach me photoshop and sewing.

Monday.

2009-12-07T15:18:00.000-08:00

The Monday Curse.

I am really not a fan of mondays. I HAVE to be on time in order to answer phone calls, which I am really bad at. I'm coming off of a bad night's sleep (you can thank my sunday afternoon nap for this), and most importantly a long time ago, somebody decided to give monday a bad rap. I love going to work. I am in love with the people in my life. I enjoy the fact that there is a space heater for my feet when I work at the front desk. But for some reason, on mondays (and this week, I'm reallly reallly hoping it's just a monday thing), I go into destructive hater mode.

The Monday Attempt.

I don't want to go all spiritual on you... but let's face it, that's the only real cure. I can think about christmas or go eat mozzarella cheese sticks or include myself in a conversation with the cool kids or watch a sappy chick flick (all of which I have and will repeatedly try) but really? Does that cure me? I mourn over it just about every time I realize it... but the answer is no.

The Monday Cure.

Lately, my Bible has been falling open to the Psalms. Mostly because they're emotional, dramatic claims on how horrible life can be (though we all know, my enemies are not after me nor is my kingdom about to be destroyed) and how big God's love and faithfulness are. There is something refreshing about David's raw honesty and bold prayers. I find myself relating to that guy a lot. So confused, so broken, yet desiring God's everything for his life.

So whether you're in the deepest pits of life, or soaring on wings like eagles, or just plain having a case of the mondays... May this meet you where you are.

"Bless the Lord, O my Soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name!

Bless the Lord, O my Soul, and forget not all his benefits,

who forgives all your iniquity,

who heals all your diseases,

who redeems your life from the pit,

who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy,

who satisfies you with good

so that your youth is renewed like the eagles."

Psalm 103:1-5

O Christmas Tree!

2009-12-05T19:21:00.000-08:00

Nate and I finally got our christmas tree up and decorated. It is beautiful and makes me happy. It smells like Christmas. I love it.

As you can see... we kind of underestimated its height. My brother says we've gone griswold

We have just a couple of special ornaments. (Don't worry. We plan on growing our collection)

We don't have any gifts under the tree (and probably won't), but we do have our little home made countdown boxes that I made for Nate last year to celebrate the 25 days of Christmas.

Thanksgiving Happenings.

2009-11-30T07:42:00.000-08:00

What a great weekend.

Word finally got out that my BFF is ENGAGED!! Good news is hard to keep to yourself.

I went to the Mizzou V KU football game with my family. It was a great game. Even though we lost. The Boarder War is becoming a new tradition in the allen family.

Nate shot a 9 point buck with a bow. Pretty Impressive. And now we have food for hibernating this winter.

AND we picked out our first Christmas Tree. It was much more emotional than I expected.

It is now officially Christmas Season. Praise God. Tomorrow Starts the 25 days of Christmas on ABC family.... Last year, I prayed each day for something different. I'm not sure what I'm going to do this year in conjunction with the amazing, cheesy Christmas movies on tv, but in the next 14 hours, I will be sure to think of something special.

I am Thankful....

2009-11-26T16:28:00.000-08:00

For....
•Nate Aucker.
•The Farm.
•My brother. That kid is funny.
•My sister and her husband. Nicole is growing me a niece.... or maybe a nephew.
•My parents. They're just plain fantastic.... And they let me borrow their dogs.
•Nate's family. They are amazing.
•My BFF and her good friend Brian.
•Mashed Potatoes.
•My Oregon Friends.
•Christmas time.
•These Boys. They let me borrow their dog too.
•Allen family get togethers (even though I can only name about five out of the 40 people - those people can cook).
•Rest.

It's beginning to feel a little bit like Christmas......

2009-11-23T07:56:00.001-08:00

Nate and I are just a month away from celebrating our very first Christmas together. For some reason, I've been feeling a lot of pressure. Like we're supposed to be really crafty and give recycled street signs and knit sweaters and bake. All of which are well and good and totally in line with the way I think we should do Christmas.... Just not really in my wheelhouse of talents. Then there are family traditions. We are new, we have a fresh start, we have our first Christmas! In 20 years, we will look back at this Christmas and say, we've been doing (insert amazing special tradition here) since our first Christmas. Silly. Right? But I am determined to come up with something good. Or I'll just wait until we have kids.

Nonetheless, I cannot WAIT for the month of December. Celebrating Jesus. Loving friends well. Gaining a few pounds. Twinkling lights. Cheesy music. Does my soul good.

Nephew Love.

2009-11-19T07:51:00.001-08:00

So... at our wedding we gave gift baskets to our close friends and family. We put all kinds of fun stuff in them (if I do say so myself) including a love mix. The CD was full of songs about our love for God and for each other. Randomly though, we put a song that has nothing to do with love whatsoever... it just makes us laugh. And guess what, my nephew loves it. He sings it. Go here. It's pretty precious.

B-O-U-N-D-A-R-I-E-S

2009-11-17T09:50:00.000-08:00

Every Tuesday (sort of), all the interns meet with one of the pastors to discuss a chapter of Boundaries. As I've said before it is wrecking me. And we're just scratching the surface. Here's what I'm learning....

•Be proactive about your boundaries. Call things out early, otherwise, they'll either keep happening and you'll be miserable, or you'll finally decide to draw a line and the other person will be hurt.

•I don't have to be the initiator. Healthy friendships are mutual. Sometimes that means I have to let friendships go.

•I am horrible at letting things go. I am rather sensitive. Uber Sensitive. I'm sure you've noticed.

•It's ok to ease into boundaries. When I accidentally say something I didn't want to share with a friend and their response hurts my heart, it's ok, I'm new at this. A life with some boundaries is better than a life of chaos.

•Sometimes you have to say NO to things that you want to do.

•I need more sleep.

•When you tell someone you're praying for them, that's a huge promise. So do it.

•I lack good time management. We're working on it.

Deep, I know. But such good stuff. For me anyway. And that's what this is ultimately about.

The Wedddding....

2009-11-16T07:42:00.000-08:00

So, In case you haven't heard, my beautiful cousin got married on Saturday. I got to be her matron of honor. We laughed a lot and cried a little and took about four thousand deep breaths. Her wedding was beautiful and sweet. It's so different being a bridesmaid on the other side of things (the already married side). I remember seeing Nate for the first time and what that felt like. I remember all the eyeballs and smiles as I walked down the aisle and what that felt like. I remember trying desperately not to mess up the vows and what that felt like. It was fun to watch as Kayla felt all these things too. I'm so excited for them. And it made me remember (because it was so long ago.....) how wonderful my wedding day was - how great my bridesmaids were, the sweet things my dad said, how weird it felt to be the one the white dress and veil, and snuggling up with my brand new husband to watch the fireworks. Weddings are fun. The first day of a new life together. How wonderful.

It's Wedddnesday!

2009-11-11T13:09:00.001-08:00

Today is Wednesday... That means several things....

•I usually work from 9:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m. (although today I got to spend more time on my hair and came in at ten).

•We hosted a huge advent conspiracy launch this morning. CNN, KMOV, and Fox were here along with Albert Pujols and a vast amount of business leaders, teachers, pastors, and other influencers in the community. This thing is moving and growing... Kind of like a starfish.

•We had an open staff meeting today. We usually have staff lunch on Wednesdays, but today we invited all of our volunteers and leaders to join us for the fun.

•Rob and I have several meetings with volunteers. We are getting so many new volunteers!! I LOVE it. I think I like the newbies, because they don't know that I'm a newbie myself. Except they do. But I'll pretend they don't.

•We can't forget the big Kahuna... YOUTHCROSSING! Kids show up, talk a lot, eat some pizza, hopefully learn a little something, and dig deep in their small groups. I greet leaders and new kids. I love new kids.

So.... On a day that consists of huge generous gifts, albert pujols, life-size posters of Chris Prestemon, and people outserving one another (I literally had a table cloth taken from me mid-spread).... I can be nothing but grateful to work in such a fantastic place. God is moving. I am unbelievably humbled to be a part of it.

Roommie Time...

2009-11-09T20:52:00.000-08:00

I miss these girls so much I could cry... and might have. Beautiful, sweet roommates. Sharing a house will make you freakishly codependent with one another... in the best form possible if I do say so myself. So happy to talk to them.

CELEBRATE!!

2009-11-08T15:18:00.000-08:00

It's Wedding Week For these two......

Congratulations!! See you Thursday!!!

So Dreamy.

2009-10-31T10:14:00.000-07:00

So Last Night I had several vivid dreams...

I dreamt that I was in the airport wearing my staff badge and kept seeing other people with staff badges too but I felt guilty because I had no idea who they were.

Then I dreamt that my brother got bit by a whale. And then I had to carry him. I'm a great sister. He was heavy.

Finally, I had the infamous dream that I forgot to wear pants to work.

I must be sleep worrying or something.

Some Things....

2009-10-29T14:38:00.001-07:00

Here are some things....

~I woke up at 3:00 a.m. this morning. I haven't even taken a nap! (not for lack of trying though).

~This book is still wrecking me.

~Giving the announcements to 250 people between the ages of 12-18 may make one wet their pants... And that's ok.

~I will probably never be a private person.

~Explorations is my favorite part of the week.

~I hate being stuck and/or angry.

~My blog is secretly one of my favorite things ever. I've never been good at journaling. I've kept this not super vague, but not super personal blog for almost 5 years. Sure looking back at some of it makes me cringe... but that's life.

~I miss double dates with these oregonians.

~Sitting Next to all the donations for the Christmas store, kind of makes me feel warm and fuzzy gives me the desire to go watch Elf.

~Texting may actually be my love language. That's ok too.

~Sometimes, it's ok to move the couch into my boss's office, curl up and watch 15 minutes of Jimmy Neutron. (maybe)

~I have TWO pregnant sisters... I can't wait to love on the newbs soon.

~My Best Cousin is getting married in 16 days! Can't wait!!

I'm sure this list could go forever.... but I'll quit here. That whole tired thing is starting to kick in I think.

This kid makes my day....

2009-10-28T19:24:00.000-07:00

Sent from my iPhone

Pictures from The HoneyMoon.

2009-10-28T14:01:00.000-07:00

Maybe it's just the change in weather, but lately I've been catching myself longing for this....

{The beach in Costa Rica}

Which makes me then long for this....

{The beautiful hills of my favorite drive on the trip}

Which causes me to remember this....

{We got to plant a tree in the rain forest. We plan to show it to our grandkids in 50 years}

and this....

{The Proud Tree Planters}

And makes me laugh at this...

{A Romantic Dinner on the Beach}

And then my heart is warmed by this...

{Sitting with my husband..reading our books..on our front porch.. in the middle of the rain forest.. not a care in the world....}

Team Living Water....

2009-10-20T08:24:00.000-07:00

In my lifetime, I have run 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 Half Marathons... If you're counting that's 2.5 full marathons. Ok so maybe you're not allowed to count that way, but I sure do. That makes me sound a little more hard core than I actually am. The truth is that on any given day, I can be found pulling a sadly slow mile and probably puking afterwards. I am still very much a novice runner. While I'm working really hard to change that, I love coming alongside other novice runners and challenging people who have never run more than a mile to consider running a half marathon. There are few things that are more exciting than to see people literally take huge steps of faith and to talk with them through that process.... rarely about running. I run for relationships. I run for conversations. And in my next race, I will run for these things as well as clean water!! You can sponsor me here. I've never run to raise money for anything before so I'm pretty excited. I'm looking forward to it and encourage others to join the team.... I just hope I can keep up!

The Prayer Appointed for the Week....

2009-10-13T08:27:00.000-07:00

Lord, I pray that your grace may always precede and follow me, that I may continually be given to good works; through Jesus Christ my lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.

To Do List.

2009-10-12T08:20:00.000-07:00

BRB.

2009-10-08T14:15:00.000-07:00

I'm going to the lake today. Who cares if it's cold and rainy. I could probably use a couple days cozied up insde. I plan on reading this book, taking a bath, and watching this movie at least twice.

The Prayer Appointed for the Week....

2009-10-06T14:22:00.000-07:00

I'm reading this book... it's called Boundaries. It is mind boggling. I don't really want to go there yet, but I am making a lot of tough decisions to change various areas and relationships in my life. I am praying that it becomes freeing... so far, it just makes me cry. Thus... here is the appointed prayer of the week.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. PLEASE. Amen.

Reminders.

2009-10-05T19:10:00.000-07:00

Today, I spent most of my day stuck at home. I have a fever and I feel a little bit like I've been hit by a truck. But I'm convinced that will all be going away any minute now. Nonetheless, this is the first time I've been sick in my new living situation. No mommy to cook me chicken noodle soup, no sidney to check on me and bring me everything my heart desires, just Nate. That probably makes me sound harsh.... but these were my exact thoughts on my drive home from work today. Sometimes you just need your mom, sometimes you just need your sidney, but today, I realized as I walked through door, I just needed Nate. When I saw the kid sitting on the couch desparately trying to find a job for us and hoping that whatever team on tv was winning, I burst into tears. He let me snuggle with him and helped me calm down and take a happy little nap.... Reminding me that he is mine and I am his. Later, we played Yahtzee and watched mindless television. Slow nights like this are rare.... And I'm grateful to be reminded that God made this boy for me. I hate when I forget that... so, it almost makes me a little happy to be sick.... almost.

And now a poem for the light hearted ones out there...

Fever fever go away,
Come again.... never.