No Rock And Roll Fun

Brian May upset by something or other to do with Michael Jackson

2009-07-03T08:02:00.003Z

I'm not entirely clear why Brian May has got such a hump on by the Jackson-Mercury tracks popping up on the web:

May revealed the existence of the songs earlier this week (begs29Jun09), saying, “He (Jackson) used to come and see us when we were on tour in the States. He and Freddie became close friends, close enough to record a couple of tracks together at Michael’s house, tracks which have never seen the light of day.”

But the rocker has been left incensed after two tunes by the pair, State Of Shock and There Must Be More To Life Than This, ended up on video sharing website YouTube.com.
He fumes, "The music thieves at work as usual."

I love the way ContactMusic explain what YouTube is, just in case you don't know.

Is May's hump as "music thieves" (who has actually stolen anything?) down to that now, when he goes "ha ha, there was a secret session no common folk have ever heard" people will go "actually, yeah, we have."

Soulja Boy: He's the rap Courtney Love

2009-07-03T07:46:00.002Z

Soulja Boy has crashed onto his Twitter account in order to flirt with the idea that he might give up rapping:

The say Soulja Boy u changed. Soulja Boy u hollywood I aint ask for this SHIT!!!!!! I want to go back to how it was before i was signed

Give it eighteen months, chuckles. Give it eighteen months.

Soulja Boy later came to his senses (by which, I suspect, we mean "his manager intervened") and the long stream of pained tweets vanished, to be replaced with some sort of bot which goes "pow" at you if you follow him. For no good reason.

Gordon in the morning: Boosting brand Beckham

2009-07-03T07:13:00.002Z

Ah, the decline of the brand, as Mr and Mrs Beckham are forced to do a crossover picture of themselves in their pants in the hope that the two of them will still have some novelty value.

Gordon Smart tries to make it seem exciting:

In one shot David - wearing just his Armani pants - lies under his wife as she seductively rests her hand on his bare chest.

But even Gordon knows that the photos are sexy only if you're turned on by the idea of two dead dollies lying on top of one another.

Even the link from the front of Bizarre tries to stifle a yawn:

Couple get their kit off AGAIN

Although, oddly, it's still Gordon's main story.

Bookmarks: Some stuff to read on the internet - George Lamb

2009-07-03T07:09:00.002Z

Swineshead at Watch With Mothers observes as George Lamb attempts to make the leap from radio to making TV documentaries. Lamb stood between the cameras and the horizon for the clumsily titled Can I Get High Legally?:

He meets a 19 year old clubber called Tom and buys some ‘legals’ from a handful of shops in Camden. He then, sitting in a trendy Camden bar with Tom, expresses amazement that they were so easy to purchase. ‘It’s as simple as buying a bag of sweets’ he gasps, despite the fact that they’re called ‘legal highs’.

The clue, Mr Lamb, is in the fucking title.

But nobody in the shops wants to talk to the camera. Possibly because they hadn’t been asked in advance. Undeterred and hell-bent on fulfilling his contract lest he doesn’t get paid, Lamb logs on and checks a number of websites that sell the Legals. Quelle surprise! They’re proper websites! Lamb seems amazed that there are functioning areas of the internet selling this stuff - despite the fact that they’re FUCKING LEGAL!

Taxpayers Alliance reckon that you could do Glastonbury with three blokes and a steadicam

2009-07-02T12:49:00.003Z

There's been some rumbling that the BBC somehow sent too many people to cover Glastonbury, because, well, 400 people sounds like a large number of people, doesn't it?

The Telegraph had fun with the story, but it seems to have first surfaced in the Standard last Friday when someone called Ben Bailey pretended that he didn't work in the media, and thus couldn't be expected to understand how many people you'd need to feed three separate TV networks, press red, and various TV channels large numbers of hours of coverage from a number of stages in a site the size of a small town.

Indeed, rather than go "they're taking 400 people for audio, video, production, lighting, rigging, running, liaison, production, generating power, playing out, transmission, editorial oversight on a massively complicated live event - wow, what a bloody brilliant feat of organisation" he got someone from the Taxpayer's Alliance to think about the number.

The Taxpayer's Alliance - whose only media experience seems to be from turning up in parts of it with space to fill - well, the reckon that 400 seems a lot, right:

Matthew Elliott, chief executive of the TaxPayers' Alliance, said: "I think the number of staff sent to Glastonbury does smack of it being more of a junket for BBC staff and presenters rather than a serious exercise. There's no way they would need 400 people to record and broadcast an event like Glastonbury.

"I'm afraid we've seen it in the past. At the Olympics there were more BBC staff than British athletes.

"We are seeing a trend here of BBC over-manning. When people combine that with the revelations of expenses last week, it shows the BBC is ready for some cuts."

"There's no way they would need 400 people" - how many, then, Matthew? Six? Two? Thirteen? Forty-seventy-twelve? If those 400 people were there on a junket, who was putting out the hours of broadcasting? Did Elliott even realise the event was being broadcast live?

Bailey decides to chip in, even if it risks making him look a bit of an idiot:

The broadcasts from the festival included Gabby Logan's show on BBC Radio 5 Live - a station known for its focus on news and sport rather than music.

This, presumably, in much the same way that the Standard is known for the desperate men stood outside tube stations trying to give the bloody things away at ten at night rather than the quality of its reporting.

Bailey, presumably, doesn't think that a major cultural event magicking the biggest town in the South West aside from Bristol from thin air isn't a news story; nor, indeed, can he ever have heard Five Live - a station whose news remit includes entertainment stories and whose film reviews are its most popular podcast.

James P - to whom thanks for the story - reckons there might be a need for more BBC staff:

If anything they should've employed more people, specifically someone to sit next to Jo Whiley in the six months before and after the event, poking her in the ribs and saying "Shhh - It's not *that* interesting" every tenth Glastonbury mention.

Personally, I think the Taxpayer's Alliance is overstaffed. They surely don't need any people at all to do what they do; all you need is a bran tub and a box of cut-up Daily Mail editorials and journalists could assemble their responses on the TA's behalf.

U2 waving into space

2009-07-02T12:42:00.002Z

More coverage of the start of the U2 tour, with the Guardian reading the Spanish press, who seem bedazzled by Bono's wiles:

Spanish reviewers were overwhelmed by the "rock power" display and struggled desperately to interpret the message in a show that featured astronauts, a video of Desmond Tutu, football, and, significantly, a Michael Jackson tribute, with Bono dedicating Angel of Harlem to the King of Pop, before playing Man In the Mirror and Don't Stop Till You Get Enough.

"This is rock designed to move both mountains and consciousnesses," concluded El Periódico newspaper.

The conversation between Bono and the space station commander was perhaps the most bizarre element of the evening. "Commander, can you see Barcelona?" Bono asked the man floating near the microphone. "Right now, the most beautiful sight in our cosmos is the blue planet earth," came the answer.

"We must look very insignificant from up there," noted the critic for El País newspaper.

It's unclear if he means from space, or from whatever ego-cloud Bono is sitting on.

Trouble is, with all this guff - designed to showcase how powerful Bono is and what his connections can do - they seem to overlooked one key aspect of a gig: being any good at music:

Most disappointing for El Pais readers was Bono fluffing two classics, One and With or Without You.

"The truth is that it was disappointing, especially compared to previous tours, full of mistakes and bad songs (from the last album)," said Alex, a reader-reviewer for El País. "To say that Bono wrecked two major songs like One and With or Without You tells you more than enough."

But who cares, eh? Look! Look! It's a spaceman on a telephone!

[Thanks to James M for the story]

BBC News defends Jackson coverage

2009-07-02T12:28:00.002Z

As with any major news story, there are questions over how much coverage the news organisations should give to it, and there have been grumblings that the BBC did too much about Michael Jackson's death.

Mary Hockaday has blogged a response on the BBC Editor's site:

Some stories divide audiences, and clearly there are those who aren't interested in Michael Jackson. But we have to try to serve a whole range of readers, listeners and viewers - and undoubtedly a great many of you were extremely interested.

The audiences to our main television bulletins were a little higher than average for a Friday evening and the statistics for our online content broke records: more than 8.2m global unique users, the second highest since Obama's election. The BBC News mobile site had its biggest-ever figures on Friday.

Hockaday, though, seems to be answering a different charge - should the BBC have covered the story at all - to the one she sets out to deal with - should the BBC have done as much.

I doubt if there's anyone who would argue that Jackson's death should not have been on the news, and very few would be able to suggest that the story shouldn't have been a lead. And, unquestionably, there was a desire to know from the public.

The question is if the 'desire to know' was in balance with the 'amount to tell' - given that BBC News Channel astons were still trying to portray 'Jackson dead' as breaking news during elevenses on Friday, it might be fair to suggest that there was, by then, a shortage of actual information to impart might mean a slightly less steely gaze should have been fixed on the expired man.

EMI reject new PRS streaming rate

2009-07-02T08:31:00.002Z

Uh-oh - more trouble as the music industry tries to pretend that infinite supply won't drive down prices. EMI publishing have refused to accept the hard-won new PRS rate for online streaming, and so henceforward will opt out of having PRS collect their royalty earnings for them.

"We are not currently satisfied that the new rates - in particular the minima - proposed by PRS for Music for streaming services are appropriate", said EMI Music Publishing's general counsel for Europe Antony Bebawi.

Quite how EMI hopes to get any value from collecting its own royalties isn't clear - even at the old rate of 0.22p a stream, without the bulk processing power of a central clearing house it's arguable that EMI will wind up with even less than at the new PRS minimum rate of 0.085p by the time they've added on their administration costs.

It's also absurd because EMI are behaving as if the PRS organisation are the sort to have accepted a crappy deal. Given that at the start of negotiations the PRS were every bit as gung-ho and unrealistic as EMI are being now, you might think that someone might have worked out that 0.085p is all there is on the table.

Jammie Thomas fights on

2009-07-02T07:57:00.003Z

Presumably she's aware that she's not going to get the guilty verdict changed, but Jammie Thomas Rasset is going to appeal the judgement against her in the recent RIAA court case. The focus is going to be on the size of the damages.

The RIAA is making 'well, if you wish...' noises:

"The defendant can of course exercise her legal rights," said Jonathan Lamy, an RIAA spokesman. "But what's increasingly clear, now more than ever, is that she is the one responsible for needlessly prolonging this case and refusing to accept any responsibility for the illegal activity that two juries decisively found her liable for. From day one, we've been fair and reasonable in exercising our rights and attempting to resolve this case."

... of course, the last thing the RIAA wants is the punitive damages being declared unconstitutional; that could unpick what remains of their legal attacks on their customers. If they could only expect reasonable damages, the legal threat would become a lot less scary.

One of the Jonas Brothers engaged, it says here

2009-07-02T07:32:00.002Z

Haircut Jonas, the most eyebrowed of The Jonas Brothers, has arranged to a special souvenir edition of Us Weekly.

Haircut told reporters "It's going to be hard deciding if my brother SlightlyWacky Jonas or my other brother Booklearning Jonas will get to stand on my left in the photos. I figure the one who doesn't stand on my left could stand on the other side... the... uh... unleft side."

Haircut has been dating his fiancee since a Disney executive told him "we want to stop those 'Haircut is gay' rumours before they start.

It's hoped that Haircut Jonas' godfather, restaurateur Chuck E. Chesse, will be present at the ceremony.

Gordon in the morning: A beautiful day

2009-07-02T06:45:00.002Z

You know what Gordon loves? Writing lots and lots and lots about Michael Jackson?

You know what else Gordon loves? Fawning over Bono.

With the first night of U2's world tour, Gordon gets to do both:

And they used the occasion to pay a surprise tribute to King Of Pop MICHAEL JACKSON.

Singer Bono dedicated Angel Of Harlem, originally written about BILLIE HOLIDAY, to Jacko, saying: "We met Michael Jackson many times over the years and he was an unspeakable talent."

Personally, I'd have tried to come up with a form of words which didn't leave it open to the interpretation that I thought he was unspeakably bad, but I guess it's the thought that counts.

Fall Out Boy need space

2009-07-01T21:19:00.003Z

I know, you've been worried - all those rumours Fall Out Boy were about to split. It's disturbing. What if you had a product you needed to sell to preteen boys? How would you launch it without a Fall Out Boy video to place your goods into?

Relax, though, they're not splitting up:

"I think I fueled that [rumor] accidentally," Wentz said. "I think that when someone asked me if we were working on any new Fall Out Boy songs, I said, 'No, not right now.'

Wentz said doesn't think that there's an endless demand for FOB. "I don't know that the world has to be all Fall Out Boy, all the time. When I see stuff like that with other bands, it sort of drives me crazy."

Instead, the band is taking the time "to breathe" between albums, though they continue to tour together and work on other projects.

Ah, yes. Leave a space between albums. Relese them too closely together, and people might start to notice they're all much of a muchness.

US turn off TV

2009-07-01T20:46:00.002Z

TV Smith was meant to be playing the US with Jay Reatard from tonight. But US immgration gas thwarted him - and not because they don't want an old punk in their nation; it's just a paperwork snafu, he says:

I'm sorry to have to report that due to problems with US immigration I'm unable to come over for the tour with Jay Reatard due to start today. Despite having my visa approved, delays at the US embassy in London mean it couldn't be ratified in time. I've had quite a lot of feedback from people looking forward to seeing me, so I'm bitterly disappointed to miss the gigs in Chicago, Detroit, Cleveland and my first ever Canadian gigs in Toronto and Montreal. I hope to come back soon and play for you. The good new is, the way things are looking I'll be seeing the embassy next week and hope to rejoin the tour in Brooklyn on the 2nd July. Keep your fingers crossed...!
Best wishes,
TV

Not quite sure why a US paperwork problem is keeping him out of the Canadian dates, mind.

We name the spam bands: The Used

2009-07-01T20:37:00.002Z

Blimey, it's been a while since this category was opened up. And, you know, one over-excited irrelevant posting about how the great new The Used single was great, and new, and oh, here's the URL for it - one, we'd overlook. But two comment-spams pushing the same band? That's just taking the piss.

MTV has a new look for the few people still looking

2009-07-01T12:50:00.002Z

There's been an overhaul done of the MTV onscreen look, which Creative Review covers extensively.

This caught my eye, though:

We use the word refresh rather than rebrand as the MTV logo is still recognisable - the new logo (above) is, in fact, the old logo - but in MTV's new look, the logo remains black on a white ground - no colour, pattern or texture will ever adorn it - which is a change from MTV of old where the idents were based on the logo being played around with.

"Now the logo is sacred," says Roberto Bagatti, Vice President of Creative for MTV Networks International and Creative Director of MTV's World Design Studio in Milan, who oversaw the project.

This is probably more significant than even Bagatti realises. The days when the MTV logo might suddenly pulse, or turn into a plasticine replica of itself, or start writhing with snakes were days when MTV was surprising, and fresh, and experimented.

Now, it's got a fixed logo. Nobody is allowed to play with it. As visual refreshes go, has there ever been one that so succinctly summed up what's wrong with a channel?

Thinking thins over

2009-07-01T12:23:00.004Z

According to Sky News, the world has spoken of little lately, save for Courtney Love's weight:

Courtney Love's weight loss has recently provoked headlines.

Recent pics of the gaunt star shocked fans the world over.

Betserai Gonorashe, chair of the Zimbabwean chapter of the Courtney Love fanclub, confirms that the shock was felt "the world over". "Yes, it's true - we were shocked. It might be thought that the only real reaction to the photos was felt in newspaper and magazine offices in London and New York, and that the reaction was 'oh, good, that's the pages where we hector women about being totally the wrong weight filled for this week, then', but no. Like our sister chapters in Santiago, Manilla and Chepstow. They were equally shocked. The guys in Vladivostok said they saw it coming, but they're full of it."

Anyway, Courtney has now joined in:

Now Courtney herself has spoken out about her weight.

Has she "spoken out"? Or has she merely spoken about it?

"I know I've got too skinny.

"I know those pictures of me are going everywhere. I know I need to sort it out."

It turns that her doctor has suggested she's malnourished - I'm expecting a blog post accusing Ryan Adams of stealing her yoghurts from the fridge by sundown.

Downloadable: Eagle And Talon

2009-07-01T07:44:00.002Z

To celebrate Canada Day - good morning, Canadians - Eagle And Talon are offering a free download of their new album. There's also an opportunity to pay what you feel is right.

Wearing it well

2009-07-01T07:35:00.003Z

A PR email drifts gently through the ether offering a chance to:

... become part of rock history!

How, though? How?

Tell me, for I must know:

[The company] celebrates Debbie Harry's birthday and offers 10% off all her T-shirts throughout the first two weeks of July. The talented and beautiful Debbie Harry celebrates her birthday today and [the company] is the perfect way to become part of rock history!

So... I'm going to become part of rock history, am I? By wearing a tshirt?

I'm wearing denim jeans this morning, by which reckoning I'm actually French.

Gordon in the morning: Guys and roles

2009-07-01T06:41:00.003Z

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World:

I’m your guy for Guys, Guy

Gordon announces that Justin Timberlake is going to star in a movie film:

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE has given GUY RITCHIE his word that he will star in one of the Lock Stock director’s next big film projects.

The pair shook hands over a whisky at the Punch Bowl pub in Mayfair on Monday night after discussing the blockbusters Guy has on the horizon.

The idea of Guy Ritchie having a blockbuster on the horizon is one of those concepts - like Gordon Brown looking forward to a landslide election victory - that can only exist if there really are parallel universes. But do carry on, Gordon - what role is Justin being lined up for?

The list includes a big-screen version of musical Guys And Dolls which would suit Justin perfectly as well as a huge remake of the classic war film Wild Geese.

So it's just a case he's going to be in Guys and Dolls. It could just as easily be I'm your guy for Geese, guys, then?

Incidentally: Guys and Dolls and Wild Geese? Ritchie really doesn't have an original thought left, does he? Has he now taken to careering round Blockbuster grabbing DVDs at random to come up with his next projects? Is there a chance he's pitching a remake of Vicky Entwistle's WOW workout?

Gordon - who is perhaps the last person in the world who is interested in Ritchie's work - is throbbing with excitement:

I have no doubt big studios like Warner Bros, who work closely with Guy, would be more than happy to sign a fat cheque for Justin’s services.

Oh, yes. Making a film nobody wants to see even more expensive. Who could turn down such a compelling offer?

He would be a nailed-on box office hit if he had the chance.

You're nailing what on the where, Gordon?

It turns out that Gordon is an equally big fan of Justin's movie work. He was in Alpha Dog, you know. And... well, surely he's done something else, hasn't he, Gordon?

his comedy role as Jacques “Le Coq” Grande in Love Guru was pretty impressive too.

Meanwhile, Gordon gets Tim Nixon to write up the Madonna nudes, with the pair excited that "we;ve got the snaps."

Yes, Gordon. The Sun has run these before, though, hasn't it? So long ago, it was when I was doing a paper round. I know Smart often runs stories that are out of date - but surely he's never repeated 25 year old stuff before, has he?

I can't believe it's what he wanted

2009-06-30T22:10:00.003Z

Hey, you know what: when the Iowa State Fair are done with its butter statue tribute to Michael Jackson, they could let AEG have it. After all, if people really think punters might be happy with Randy, Tito and a projection of the late Michael, surely a giant dairy effigy would convince the last few stragglers that they're getting their money's worth?

Sugar Ray's thesingerfromSugarRay offers some advice to Obama

2009-06-30T21:54:00.002Z

CNN's iReport finds space for Sugar Ray's Mark McGrath to offer some advice to Barack Obama on, erm, stopping smoking - although, frankly, the very thought of getting advice from Sugar Ray about anything is enough to make strong men think about taking up heroin.

McGrath offers to quit alcohol if Barack gives up smoking. Oh, yes, because if he won't do it for his health, or his kids - or to avoid the shame of having to stand outside the next G8 meeting in a converted bus shelter to grab a puff - surely the thought of taking a challenge from the singerfromSugarRay out of Sugar Ray will be the clinching reason?

Folding magazines: Vibe

2009-06-30T19:40:00.002Z

It's been struggling for a while, but now the struggle is at an end: Vibe magazine is closing with immediate effect:

In a memo to staff members announcing the closure, Steve Aaron, chief of the Vibe Media Group, wrote that for months, the company tried in vain to either find new investors or “to restructure the huge debt on our small company.”

“The print advertising collapse hit Vibe hard, especially as key ad categories like automotive and fashion, which represented the bulk of our top 10 advertisers, have stopped advertising or gone out of business,” he wrote.

The most frustrating thing for the magazine is that its circulation wasn't too bad for the time; it's just there wasn't anything to sell to them.

Pirate Bay flogs itself off

2009-06-30T19:30:00.003Z

The music industry has finally had its victory over Pirate Bay - its owners have concluded its value is in the brand and not the service, and flogged it all off to a software company:

Following the completion of the acquisitions, GGF intends to launch new business models that allow compensation to the content providers and copyright owners. The responsibility for, and operation of the site will be taken over by GGF in connection with closing of the transaction, which is scheduled for August 2009.

"We would like to introduce models which entail that content providers and copyright owners get paid for content that is downloaded via the site" said Hans Pandeya, CEO GGF.

"The Pirate Bay is a site that is among the top 100 most visited Internet sites in the world. However, in order to live on, The Pirate Bay requires a new business model, which satisfies the requirements and needs of all parties, content providers, broadband operators, end users, and the judiciary. Content creators and providers need to control their content and get paid for it. File sharers' need faster downloads and better quality" continues Hans Pandeya.

Boing Boing's thoughts on this are pretty much what ours were when we heard about the deal - isn't this the selfsame idea that drove the sale of the Napster brand? And how did that turn out, exactly?

Brokep has also issued a statement:

TPB is being sold for a great bit underneath it's value if the money would be the interesting part. It's not. The interesting thing is that the right people with the right attitude and possibilities keep running the site. As all of you know, there's not been much news on the site for the past two-three years. It's the same site essentially. On the internets, stuff dies if it doesn't evolve. We don't want that to happen.

We've been working on this project for many years. It's time to invite more people into the project, in a way that is secure and safe for everybody. We need that, or the site will die. And letting TPB die is the last thing that is allowed to happen!

If the new owners will screw around with the site, nobody will keep using it. That's the biggest insurance one can have that the site will be run in the way that we all want to. And - you can now not only share files but shares with people. Everybody can indeed be the owner of The Pirate Bay now. That's awesome and will take the heat of us.

It's not clear from this if the new owners are also buying the liabilities of the site - which could weigh down any plans to go legitimate.

Trouble is, if the current Pirate Bay team think "the new owners won't wreck the site, because they'll lose the visitors", that is at best naive - clearly, the new owners think "people will keep coming because of the name." It's all going to end in bitter tears and painful recriminations, isn't it?

[Thanks to Michael M]

"Or maybe LaToya... and... perhaps Liz Taylor?"

2009-06-30T19:22:00.002Z

The Daily Telegraph uses the comfort blanket of "it has been reported" to try and distance itself from running this piece of speculation:

Janet Jackson could take her brother Michael Jackson's place for some of the concerts he was due to perform at London's O2 Arena, it has been reported.

The four remaining members of the Jackson 5 may also appear as a backing band if some of the 50 scheduled shows go ahead despite the 50year-old's death.

Promoters are said to be in talks with Michael Jackson's siblings about filling in at some of the concerts, and may also be considering honouring all the dates by projecting a digital image of Jackson onto the stage.

Ah, yes. I paid seventy five quid to see the King Of Pop (TM) and instead see someone projecting a slide of a dead guy onto the stage alongside Randy Jackson. I'm not going to feel cheated, am I?

Jackson: Luckily saved for posterity

2009-06-30T19:19:00.002Z

Now, here's a funny thing, as Karl T points out:

Fear not, MJ fans! Despite the singer's death, AEG aren't going to deprive you of new product!

Now, obviously, there are reasons to have cameras at a dress rehersal (performer feedback, making of.. documentary, blocking of shots for the actual performance etc etc), but to have captured Jackson's final performance in "multi-camera high-definition video and multi-track surround-sound audio" is fortuitous indeed.

If only the guys involved in formulating digital strategy for the major labels had had that kind of foresight.

It's popularly believed that AEG didn't have an insurance policy for the fifty nights... it turns out that maybe they did after all.