Someday, I'll act my age.

Grandma was an awesome audience.

2009-06-25T12:34:00.003-05:00

Someone asked me the other day if I had grown another foot since the last time I saw them. At 6'4", I get asked that a lot.

When I was younger, my grandma asked me that question every time I saw her and hugged her. And every time, I would look down and say, "Nope... I still just have 2." She would laugh hysterically. She lived just up the road from us, so I saw her on a very regular basis. This wasn't once a year or something like that. This was a few times a month.

But every time, she laughed like it was the first time I ever said it.

Years later, after she moved to Tallahassee, she was basically a bedridden, vegetable because of Alzheimer's.

I just realized that's probably why it was so easy to reuse jokes on her.

Forgotten.

2009-05-18T00:16:00.003-05:00

I guess I'll start this thing back up again.

I've been bored off my ass for the last few months, mainly because I haven't been working. But I got the call yesterday that we start shooting this monster in a little over a month, so I need to get off my ass and do some fun stuff.

And by "fun stuff", I mean leaving the house.

Party starter.

2008-12-15T12:21:00.002-06:00

I was just reading an article about Dan Deacon in the NY Times. The article began with, "Dan Deacon, a renowned party starter..." I dream that one day, a great journalistic essay will begin with, "Schlitz Drinker, a renowned party starter..."

Hopefully, it won't be my epitaph.

And hopefully, they won't feature a picture of the cereal and milk I just spilled down the front of my shirt.

Fuck.

Fork.

2008-12-01T16:23:00.002-06:00

I keep forgetting about this blog thing. It's hard as fuck to write when I'm working. It's much like relationships. When I'm working, I'm around about 0% of the time, usually around 2 months at a time. When I'm not working, Im around about 100% of the time, for all the time.

Apparently, that's not what the ladies are into.

Blah this, blah that.

2008-10-23T23:34:00.002-05:00

Tomorrow is the end of week three of shooting. For the most part, it'll be the half-way point. The shoot gets better and better as we go. And by better, I mean easier. Things just get simplified.

In other news, a certain actress gave me a sweet, little shoulder scratch today after we both gazed in despair at the insaneness of a certain director.

It was nice and I probably looked more into the touch than I should have.

Work and such and suck

2008-10-17T08:46:00.002-05:00

Tonight ends week 2 of shooting the ol' movie. Only 5 more weeks to go. It's been kinda chill, for the most part at least. The director is a little insane. And not in a good way. Claire got stepped on by a cow last week. My farmer's tan is back in full effect. Wrap beers on the trucks have been banned by the producers, but no one cares or listens. Nothing really crazy or exciting.

Tonight is the Wedding Present show. I have a ticket. I've had it for a month now. Apparently, we're shooting fairly late tonight. Late enough for me to not go to the show.

Must. Keep. Hulk. Inside.

In other shitty news, last night was Catherine Ohara's last night of shooting. She was gone only 2 hours, and everyone already missed her. I think I'm in love.

I can't wait to get super, duper, crazy, extra-retarded drunk this weekend.

In other news, I returned 3 movies to Netflix on, literally, the 1 year anniversary of me receiving the movies. Sometimes I love wasting money.

Spaghetti and popcorn.

2008-09-27T12:10:00.001-05:00

Paul Newman died this morning.

Sometimes, life sucks.

Doug cares.

2008-09-12T14:10:00.001-05:00

Saving Bristol

Eighch Bee Owe

2008-09-04T11:48:00.001-05:00

I just got a call this morning. We start shooting this monster in a month.

Time to drink up.

Sunburns.

2008-08-08T04:15:00.002-05:00

Update schmupdate.

I'm too busy eatin' and swimmin' and playin' golf.

Pics.

2008-07-15T00:05:00.004-05:00

Seth is an awesome photographer. I think he elegantly caught the essence of Corndogorama. Minus the corndogs, of course.

And yes, I'm well aware that I still need a haircut.

Bleeping bleep.

2008-07-05T11:31:00.004-05:00

I kind of just read over some of my past entries and realized how much I cuss. I think I'm going to try and ease up on the language. I said try.

My 4th was pretty chill. David and Jenny and I picked up some beer and headed out to Rick's compound for some eatin' and drinkin' and playin' old school video games and pinball and hangin' with friends. The fireworks show was pretty fantastic, too. Thanks, Rick!

I'm finally getting to relax. And it feels good. Corndogorama was pretty awesome. I'll get some pictures up on Flickr as soon as the laziness meter gets down to about 3. About 10 minutes before we left, I got into an argument with the guy that runs the corndog selling stand. I should have talked to him normally before I had about 35 Busch tallboys. I don't want to get into it, but I think I'm going to show him who's boss next year with my own brand of battered hot dogs on a stick.

In other news, as hard as I tried, my "battered hot dog shelter" joke never really caught on.

No more alarm clocks.

2008-06-27T01:17:00.002-05:00

We finished shooting the ol' movie tonight. Finally. The six week schedule turned into a nine week schedule. But I think I'm off until September now, so things are cool.

I bought a last minute plane ticket to Atlanta for Corndog-O-Rama this weekend. I enjoy most things that end in 'o-rama'. I'll only be there for like 2 days, but I just wanted to get the fuck out of town and drink my ass off. Kind of clean the slate, then get back here and put together the life that I've neglected for the last 6 months because of work.

This entry is going south fast. I can feel the bitterness biting through. I guess I'm just tired and should probably sleep. I have an assload of crap to do tomorrow before my 7am flight on Saturday morning.

Happiness to come. Soon.

A few more from the series...

2008-06-09T20:35:00.004-05:00

Green machine.

2008-06-07T23:01:00.003-05:00

On Monday night, The Incredible Hulk is going to be on American Gladiators.

Its about time television got it right.

Oooh, I need some beer. Been drinking dirty ass martinis for the last 2 hours and the gin is gone. It's movie marathon night on my couch tonight. Saturday night and I'm watching movies by myself and drinking martinis. How lame is that?

Tomorrow's madness? Clean the house and do laundry. Punk rock will never die!

In other news...

Rollerkoaster

2008-06-01T21:15:00.002-05:00

I guess this is 13 or 14 years old now. Holy shit, I'm old. But gottdam, I forgot how much I loved Railroad Jerk.

In other news, I had a sinus infection for the last week and a half. Totally awesome. The only thing better than standing on your feet and working for 12 hours a day, is doing it while sick. And with the hours that we work, I can't even get to the doctor's office. I spent most of Friday apologizing to fellow crew folks that I had pissed off during the week (I get super pissy when I'm either tired or sick or both). I also got an earful from Mel the entire week for not going to the doctor. Today, I found a walk-in clinic that was open on Sunday. The doctor lady prescribed me some antibiotics and some sort of steroid nasal spray. The antibiotics (and the doctor) say that I shouldn't take them with alcohol, but we'll just see what happens with that.

Halfsies waysies. Kind of.

2008-05-23T15:41:00.003-05:00

We hit the middle point of shooting for Shorts. I'm so fucking tired. Four weeks in and we're already adding extra weeks to the end of the schedule.

Everything's fairly cool. The kids are chill. W.H. Macy is awesome. Spader is an oddball.

We're shooting nights this week. Basically 7pm to 7am. Our location is about 45 minutes out of town, so I've been riding to work with Ethan every day to save on some sweet gas money. Yesterday morning, he dropped me off after filming. I got out of the van and he took off. I took about 5 steps toward my front door and realized I had left my wallet and keys in the sound trailer at work. So about 10 minutes later, I'm busting out my back bathroom window to climb through. Head first. Nothing was going to stop me from making sweet love to my pillows and mattress.

I can't wait for the weekend. Someone is gonna get drunk, and considering it'll only be me on the couch by myself with the newly stocked liquor cabinet, that "someone" will probably be me.

At least my fingers are crossed that it'll be me.

Elliott vs Kermit

2008-05-11T11:25:00.000-05:00

Brilliant.

Melty.

2008-04-25T19:08:00.003-05:00

"If Heaven and Hell decide that they both are satisfied."

I'm not a Dresden Dolls fan, and I am in no way, shape, or form a Death Cab fan, but Amanda Palmer's cover of "I Will Follow You Into the Dark" is absolutely, fucking beautiful.

Amanda's Myspace thingy. (Right now it's the last song)

Phil.

2008-04-19T03:03:00.002-05:00

Holy fuckshit, I can't wait to see this son of a bitch.

In other news, for a dude that's off, I sure have been busy as crapola for the last few weeks.

We start shooting this monster in 10 days.

Pray for me, diary thingy.

Cash money.

2008-04-08T11:31:00.003-05:00

I bet the most lucrative job back in pirate days was eyepatch salesman.

And I bet the most lucrative job in Sturge days this morning was vodka salesman.

P.S. - And the most lucrative job right now is backspace salesman. Stupid alcohol.

Omega Man.

2008-04-06T02:39:00.002-05:00

Charlton Heston died tonight. Fucking finally.

I've been thinking about death way too much lately. I found out that an old, good friend of mine killed himself the other day. I, in no way, shape, or form, deserve to be the judge, but some people just deserve to be dead. And some people deserve to live forever.

Unfortunately, the outcomes are usually reversed.

P.S. - I'll probably proof-read this tomorrow morning when I'm sober and will delete this bastard of an entry. I might even delete this whole bastard of a blog. Cuz some things deserve to die.

Getting the fuck out of the US.

2008-03-23T14:57:00.002-05:00

Jesus vs Rock

2008-03-20T17:27:00.002-05:00

My mom called today and asked if I was doing anything special for Easter.

I said, "No".

I guess I don't consider getting mega-hobo drunk and falling down a whole bunch "special" any more.

Doing nothing.

2008-03-20T12:01:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was the first of five days off for us.

I got extra retarded drunk all day. Ordered way too much chinese take out. Blasted the stereo. And passed the fuck out.

Today, I was going to start running all the errands and doing all the chores that I've had to neglect for the last 6 weeks, but with 5 days off, I can afford to repeat yesterday's antics.

Maybe even do it again tomorrow.

Dare to dream.