tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18355687.post-1156463447970796232006-08-24T11:48:00.000-12:002006-08-24T16:13:51.910-12:00In a startling development, top political analysts have conceded that President George W. Bush has finally reached a nadir where he is simply beyond criticism.<br /><br />Robert Goldsmith of the Washington Press Corps elaborated, "Bush has achieved a position that no other political figure in history has -- every conceivable failure has now been documented. Lost wars, a ruined economy, corruption, incompetence and the destruction of the American way of life as we know it -- these are merely the beginning of an endless litany of collosal failures our 43rd president has spearheaded. People have simply run out of things to say about this man. Comparisons to Hitler, accusations of being the anti-christ -- these are all old-hat at this point. Bush has simply exhausted the available list of things a human being can do wrong."<br /><br />Left-wing pundits agree. Carl Johnstone of Democracy Now says, "Five years into this disastrous presidency and we've run out of things to say in our effort to enlighten Bush-supporting morons. Cocaine addiction, drunk-driving, the inability to formulate simple sentences -- none of these things have been enough to crack his core supporters. It seems that there will always be around a third of the population that supports this titanic dipshit. I think he could take a crap on a statue of Jesus on the White House lawn while masturbating onto a dying child's face and the Christian Right would find a way to justify his actions. It's actually quite impressive that one man could be so mythically heinous. I'd call him the anti-christ, but I always believed the anti-christ would be a charismatic figure who was beloved by billions. Bush is just too easy to hate."<br /><br />Basic statistics support these recent findings: Bush is not only the world leader with the lowest I.Q., he has also done the most measurable environmental damage, incurred the greatest economic loss, and tallied the most wartime defeat of any other leader. His record of criminal behavior, drug addiction and boorish behavior is well documented.<br /><br />"The guy is unstoppable," laments Guy Standage of Columbia University. "I can't think of anything he doesn't suck at or ruin due to his incalculable idiocy, greed or evil. Dubya is the reverse Midas."<br /><br />Having now accepted the fact that Bush has done all the wrongs that can be done -- and yet somehow also surviving unscathed -- prominent thinkers and humanitarians worldwide have begun organizing a mass global suicide.Hans Gruberhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05838586755259329905noreply@blogger.com