The last thing on my mind

Patience

2009-03-06T11:37:00.001+01:00

Day merges into day
living without life
loving only memories
hoping against hope
for a future too distant to see..

floating
from one place to the next
hoping for a means to pay my pound of flesh
will those means take me home?

Routine!be rid of me!
away grey skies
want to feel passion again
want to stretch the limits of my mind and body
for a cause that gives me purpose..

Another day goes by
I need to get through the present
for the future to arrive
Patience, I bid myself
with strength of belief
The right time will come.

Outraged

2008-11-28T20:57:00.003+01:00

Watching the images on the screen from far away, I am just struck by how confident these terrorists are. They know their way around the intricate stairwells of the taj, they bought 70kilos of mutton anticipating the long haul they had in front of them, they were young boys not much older than 25 brandishing heavy artillery..

Its not clear where they came from- some point to accross our borders, some point to inside the homeland, but it is clear that there is a sinister ideology spreading that seeks to destroy human life and our confidence in the beliefs we hold dear.
Mumbai is a safe city.. its the city that I used to travel at wee hours of the night alone in this belief, its the city that bounced back after floods, blasts, riots.. unimaginable catastrophe..
Always retaliating with the "never say die", "we wont let you touch our spirit" attitude.
But something has changed in the last 51 hours that has shaken our spirit.

After being in the trains during the events of that fateful day in July 2006, I wrote that "you cant destroy goodness and compassion. I certainly hope that all the people of this city and country are able to keep this faith but not turn it to the apathetic "chalta hai" attitude of before.
The "spirit of Mumbai" needs to be redefined from the fuzzy notions of indomitability to tangible actions of change. We should not tolerate such breaches of security. We must demand that action is taken. We must ensure that the lives lost were not in vain.

We must match every measure of evil that we have seen with truth ,positive action to rid terror and intolerance for divisiveness.

Paris v/s London

2008-11-01T00:05:00.002+01:00

Paris, Je t'aime. Tu me manques beaucoup.
Je ne sais pas quand je vais te voir..Il est tout simplement ces petites choses qui me manquent le plus de vous
Parisiens, you are so unwelcoming on the surface, you act like you dont exist on the trains, you shout, you scream and swear when you dont even know you were at fault.. But once you scratch the surface, and beyond the hard exterior, you are so warm- welcomed me into your homes, and you go out of your way for no particular reasons.
Parisiens,you say Bonjour, Englishmen hand you your change. Ca va? No exchange of pleasantaries at the grocery store, no conversation in the elevator about the weather, its just the business in the England. No time to stop and smell the roses. Its business all the way.
No long lunch break, no maison de campagne..its just all work and no play.
If a Parisien doesnt like you, you can tell by the look on his face. With an Englishman, you just havent the foggiest! The stiff upper lip extends to the whole body and when it thaws, what you get are fat Englishwomen with no class running around on the roads drunk in the night with hardly any clothes on! C'est pas tres chic, je pense.
Les Parisiens like to keep it separate, to love the good things in life- to dress well, to eat well, to talk with knowledge..
Peut etre, je ne sais pas suffit to make the comparison yet, but Paris, je t'aime. London, you're fantastic. But I left my heart in another place. You will just have to settle for second best.

2008-10-12T00:25:00.003+02:00

Yesterday, someone asked me, "So, why did it take you so long to get back to the books?"
For the last few years, I've been wandering around asking myself questions mostly and that has led me to some interesting places. When I look back at it all, its an interesting story- with the diversity of places, with different people, and some funny stories along the way.

But sometimes, I dont know how to explain it all in a new environment. How do I convey the background, my decisions, and the journey? Where do I begin?
And then again, I think- why should I explain? I am who I am, take me as I am right now- as you hear me, as you see me.
I don't really know how many friends I have taken with me along the way- but some close ones do remain.
I would say 2008 has been a year in transition. This year, I have already moved "home" three times. And there are still about 2 months left in the year.
Im still searching for that big idea- and there are so many in this environment to choose from. Im not sure which one to commit myself to. Whats viable? What will I want to commit myself to? Where will this lead?

Perhaps these are eternal questions. Perhaps I should stop being so serious and just pop off to bed. Go with the flow, I guess and follow the traits of the water bearer that my sign says Im supposed to be.

A pitstop

2008-08-23T13:19:00.002+02:00

Crossroads again.
A new place to explore.New people to meet.
New ideas to discover...

Life outside my window seems like images in fast forward mode. Passing me by, while I take a pit stop.
I'm tired of the monotony of standing still, but it isn't time to move yet. So I sit, biding my time, enjoying the security of stasis, while I sip my cup of coffee.

Soon, again it will be time to leave loved ones in one continent for new experiences in another.
Is it worth the separation?
Will loved ones be safe while I'm gone?
I should be back in a jiffy- I hope.

Afterglow

2008-06-06T11:55:00.004+02:00

Everytime I listen to this song, I feel like Im going to melt...
Listen to it here

Afterglow
-INXS

Here I am
Lost in the light of the moon
That comes through my window
Bathed in blue
The walls of my memory
Divides the thorns from the roses
It’s you and the roses
Touch me and I will follow
In your afterglow

Heal me from all this sorrow
As I let you go
I will find my way
When I see your eyes
Now I’m living
In your afterglow

Here I am
Lost in the ashes of time
But who owns tomorrow
In between
The longing to hold you again
I’m caught in your shadow
I’m losing control
My mind drifts away
We only have today
Touch me and i will follow
In your afterglow

Heal me from all this sorrow
As i let you go
I will find my way
I will sacrifice
Till that blinding day
When i see your eyes
Now i’m living
In your afterglow

When the veils are gone
As I let you go
As I let you go
Touch me and I will follow
In your afterglow

Heal me from all this sorrow
As I let you go
I will find my way
I will sacrifice
Now i’m living
In your afterglow

Bathed in blue
The walls of my memory
Divides the thorns from the roses
It’s you who is closest

Shifting continents

2008-06-05T14:13:00.003+02:00

Once again, I find myself in the situation I was last year. Im leaving Paris in a month after a wonderful year in this brilliant city.

Getting ready to pack up and move. And I'm going to be unpacking and repacking three countries in 4 months. The limits of my definition of "home" have changed significantly since I left Mumbai. Over the last 4 years, I have changed more cellphone numbers than I can remember.

I have loved living in Paris in the middle of this international environment- amongst people from different corners of the globe who use different tongues to express ideas, feelings and situations. There is never a dull moment in the city: always a new play to see, a new restaurant to discover, a festival to attend, a museum to explore, a new nightclub to enjoy...

I'll miss Paris, but Im looking forward to Mumbai next and after that LONDON!
This year has been excellent, and I cant wait for the next!

Where do I begin?

2008-03-09T17:43:00.002+01:00

Where do I begin to start explaining the story of the last few months?
The places that I have been- the things that I have seen, the people that I have met.

The story has had so many twists and turns, and sometimes seemed neverendingly slow, sometimes too fast, sometimes it seemed like nothing was happening..
The climax is still to come, and I dont know what the ending of this episode will be.
But it leaves me feeling so content. :)

All I have is memories, and too many to put to words. Perhaps I'm too impatient to put them into words..
I leave you with a few pictures of what the last few months have been...

Paris and weekend trips

2007-08-27T13:14:00.000+02:00

I'd like to say that a badly updated blog is a sign of much activity :)

Im sure you've enjoyed the bubbly golden champagne that is usually popped at celebrations. Last weekend, I had the opportunity to visit Reims in the Champagne area of France.Just 45 minutes from Paris, this unassuming little village is the base of some of the largest champagne makers in the world!

We decided to visit the home of Pommery where we took a tour of the champagne cellars. About 30 meters underground, the cellars cover acres and acres of damp tunnels where the precious bubbly liquids are delicately nurtured.The cellars were built some 2000 years ago by Gaullo- Roman tribes who used the underground stones for their buildings.

I can also say that I've been going to Church every Sunday with the number of cathedrals Ive visited here :)

A few weekends ago ,I went to Chartes,which is home to one of the most ancient cathedrals in Europe.The cathedral is supposed to be famous for holding Mother Mary's original robes which were presented to Emperor Charlemagne in the 9th century AD in the crusades in Jerusalem.
The town of Chartres has the cathedral right in the centre, and Im quite sure that even if you gather all the people from the town, the cathedral would still be quite empty!!

One curious thing about France that Ive seen so far is that even in the smallest of places you visit, you will encounter at least 3/4 museums- and of the most absurd things- Museum of trains, museum of automobile parts, butterflies (?!)

Will keep you updated on my adventures!You can get a more visual idea of my words above by clicking on the flickr badge on the left.

Would you like a baguette?

2007-08-04T10:56:00.000+02:00

It's now been about 3 weeks since Ive been in Paris and I keep noticing things that surprise me and make me smile.
One such thing is the way French are about their Baguettes (a long loaf of bread)!

The French can eat their baguettes anywhere and anytime. So much so that they carry them around every where they go. At the supermarket, when you ask for a baguette, they give you this long piece of freshly baked bread almost unwrapped in your hand!
A French family I spent time with a weekend ago, was carrying 3 baguettes in the trunk of their car! And when we were leaving the car, the head of the family took two out and left one in the trunk. When I unknowingly asked why not take out the third loaf, I was told that it was for breakfast the next day (?!) (Somehow,this unknowing Indian girl didnt really picture a car's trunk as a storage area for bread!)

You see Frenchmen crunching on their baguettes on the streets and peeping out of their backpacks while on a run!

In my pursuit to find out the reason why such an attachment to baguette, I found this little piece of information.
"The story goes that the baguette was developed during Napoleon's campaigns against the Russians. His soldiers were told to pack extra clothes for the cold weather in the East but this left minimal space for food. The baguette was shaped so that it could be stored down the soldiers' trouser legs. The myth becomes less convincing, however, when it is known that Napoleon's armies traveled with mobile bakery units,[3] making it less likely that the individual soldier would have had to carry his own bread. Furthermore, a glance at the uniforms would dispel any remaining suspicion that the trouser legs might have had room for loaves of bread. [4] Napoleon did, however, help influence the shape and size of the baguette; in the past, there was a competition to see who could bake the longest baguette, but due to the association with excess consumption, Napoleon denoted the current length"

The slim, two-foot long baguette and its heftier cousin, pain parisian, are as much a part of Parisian identity as the Arc de Triomphe or the Eiffel Tower.
Well, I guess as long as it tastes great, I shouldnt really ask questions, about where they put it...

First impressions

2007-07-18T13:43:00.000+02:00

Greetings everyone from a hot and sunny Paris! After 8 hours of traveling on a flight to get here, I reached safely on the 11th afternoon. Thanks for all your emails and messages, I’m doing very well.
So , my dear friends, this is a relation of my adventures so far…

I arrived at the Mumbai airport at 4am with all of my 60 kilos in check-in luggage. (Learning number 1: However many times officials confirm your weight allowance- don’t believe it unless its written down!!) So, unfortunately, I had to leave behind 14 kilos comprising certain essentials (?!) for my Paris existence- viz: a pressure cooker, hair dryer, books etc. Travelling light is an art that I am still to learn!

On the flight, it turned out that my dad knew a pilot who knew the commander of the aircraft and I was upgraded to First Class on Air India :) So I spent 8 hours on the flight sipping on my wine and having caviar! To my pleasant surprise, my neighbor on the sofa behind me in first class was none other than the famous Indian lyricist and script writer- Gulzar! Poor guy, Im sure he wanted to have a nap on the flight but was too distracted by my gasps as we flew across the Mediterranean sea and the Balkans. Nevertheless, I think I made the flight a little more interesting for him too.

When I arrived, I was ushered to my new (temporary) home at the India house in the Cite Universitaire campus in Paris and whisked around to get the basics to set up a life in this city. The Notre Dam, the Metro, the Champs Elysees- its amazing how much you can squeeze into 24 hours!

The first weekend that I arrived was the 14th of July- the French Independence day! The day started off with a parade on the Champs Elysees followed by a concert sponsored by Sarkozy under the backdrop of the Eiffel Tower. About 600, 000 people turned up to groove to the beats of Nelly Futardo, Bob Sinclair and an old favourite French singer- Polnareff. Post this, there were fireworks to the tune of music just behind the Eiffel tower! I even begin to describe how spectacular the sight was.. Please check the pictures on my flickr badge alongside- however, even the pictures don’t do justice!

After a brilliant start to my life in Paris, I began work at Alcatel Lucent. As an incredibly huge office, with departments and sub-departments , the atmosphere is completely different to what I am used to. So far, so good- friendly people, a challenging assignment and an interesting time to be in the company with the newly formed merger.

To say the very least, my first week in Paris has been exhilarating and everything that I expected it to be. I hope my chain of good luck continues!
This blog will now have a second life- and I intend to post soon. For pictures and comments, please check my flickr badge alongside. Mail me!

Here I come

2007-06-30T07:49:00.000+02:00

An update is much overdue...
So after quitting my job, moving back home, working on a lot of small and random things, I managed to get hold of a great opportunity through old connections at AIESEC. Im going to be working with Alcatel-Lucent based in Paris!

The last few weeks has been packing, running around, getting papers stamped,etc,etc. Im due to leave on the 11th of July. Paris, here I come!

Watch this space for more updates :)

A tarot card reading?

2007-05-24T14:43:00.000+02:00

I've been trying to answer a lot of questions for myself over the last few months- and the search has lead me to some interesting places. One thing for sure,I know Im not going to invest much time in again is tarot card reading- Ive had some crazy interpretations.
After this, though, I promise..

You are The Star

Hope, expectation, Bright promises.

The Star is one of the great cards of faith, dreams realised

The Star is a card that looks to the future. It does not predict any immediate or powerful change, but it does predict hope and healing. This card suggests clarity of vision, spiritual insight. And, most importantly, that unexpected help will be coming, with water to quench your thirst, with a guiding light to the future. They might say you're a dreamer, but you're not the only one.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

brb

2007-05-12T13:40:00.000+02:00

Havent been here for a while.Back soon, I promise.

Chapter closed

2007-03-03T04:15:00.000+01:00

Bags packed.
Old newspapers sold.
A rose plant given away.
Dues cleared. Pictures taken.
Tasklists complete.
A lock on the door of my appartment.

The end of a chapter.The story goes on..

A little wiser.
A little less naive.
Mixed Feelings .

No regrets.

Multiple choice question

2007-02-04T17:10:00.000+01:00

Over the last few months, Ive been trying to answer the following multiple choice question, and have finally made a decision.

Q: What happens next?
a) Continue in permanent job
b) Earn more money and have no time to use it
c) Work at a job that doesn't fit in with the future I see for myself
d) Do GMAT and get into a conventional MBA mode
e) Quit job, move cities and see what happens

A: Option (e) has been chosen.

I don’t know whether it’s the “correct answer”, but going on instinct, it feels right.
When will the results be out? Waiting to find out how I score.

women everywhere

2007-02-03T05:32:00.000+01:00

Over the last few weeks, Ive had the opportunity to travel extensively accross this vast country to places I would have never thought Id visit earlier, and met some very interesting people - especially women, along the way.

My first stop were three towns in the state of Gujarat for the wedding of a friend. Gujarat as a state is known for its loud and vibrant women and is fairly safe. At the wedding since my friend was busy with all his ceremonies, I was introduced to other young women my age. These girls, between 20-24 years of age, were all recently married, engaged or waiting to be engaged- and it seemed to be the most obvious thing to do. In a conversation with one of them, I learnt that one of them had never been out of the state of Gujarat!
The young women who were waiting to be engaged spent their time taking tuition classes for young children, embroidery, making pickles, and the like.
And it was the most obvious thing to do.

I then headed to Raipur,a small town in the state of Chattisgarh. On the flight I met an old friend of mine. She, along with a friend had decided to take printouts of the tourism page of the state of Orissa and do a lonely planet style holiday.She had recently finished an assignment with her company and decided to take off. All she had planned was her plane ticket back.A complete contrast from the earlier bunch I had met a week ago.

Then back in Mumbai, I made a call to an old friend N. N had gotten married in 2003 to her long time love and told me she was 5 months pregnant! I immediately rushed to meet her. I found her glowing and happy but completely isolated from our friends' circle.
Her life included caring for the new life growing inside her,dodging an irritating mother in law and being a doting wife to her hubby. Yet another contrast.

Another one I got in touch with was contemplating running away from home to be married only to escape a lifetime of predefined mate.

It really led me to think, the first bunch of women symbolized the average woman socialized into cooking, embroidery and the like. The second type was the urban woman who believed that the world was her oyster- totally oblivious to the contrasts of life around her. And the third and fourth had an extremely similar upbringing to me- urban, educated, exposed to different ideas, - but still chose to make the conventional life choices of beginning a family very early and submitting themselves to the will of another..

In school and college, I remember being at an equal footing (even one a step ahead) of the boys in my class. But out in real life, everything seems to change. Education does create aspirations, but then the "powers that be" in society seem to undo everything?

Not to say that I condescend these women, everyone has a choice to make and lives the conscequence of those choices. Its just that with more and more women I meet around me who have lives so completely different to mine, I get the sense of this world being very lonely for women who have an ambition...

Some images

2007-01-14T06:23:00.000+01:00

The last few weeks have been a lot of exploring in different directions. Still to figure out where it's all leading to though..Will keep you posted..

The last thing on my mind

2006-12-17T06:13:00.000+01:00

What is at the top of your mind?
It seems so easy to discuss frivolous things like the weather, what people wear, Rakhi Sawants exit from Big Boss, etc.Its what everyone feels so comfortable doing as it does not in anyway touch upon something that comes close to anything personal.

These meaningless things do not even occupy an inch of space in the mind. I cant think of a single person I know contemplating the weather and changes in the Big Boss cast when alone ..
Nevertheless, these last things on our minds seem to be the easiest to talk about, and laugh at in a meaningless manner.
Irrelevant, insignificant things seem at the hot topics of conversation.

In fact, I even knew of someone who would read joke books and articles about latest happenings in the world just before a party so that he would have something to talk about. And he really was the centre of conversation.
Im no better, Im also a big culprit of letting the last thing on my mind be the first topic of conversation.

Although, sometimes, in the process, I keep losing track about what the most important thing at the top of my mind was. .. Like for example,what was the point of this post?

Some good reads

2006-11-25T08:35:00.000+01:00

Over the last few weeks, Ive had the time and the patience to just sit back, put my legs up and read in this sleepy city.Some books Ive been reading Ive added to a list by the side of my blog.

And Ive been reading quite a bit- Im currently reading a book called "The Great Indian Novel" featured in the space on the left of my blog. An interesting read by India's unfortunate UN Secretary General candidate, Shashi Tharoor, in his pre- UN days.
The plot very intriguing- the tale of the Mahabarata retold to encompass India's journey to independence from the British rule. The narrator of the tale is an 80 something ear old man called VV and the scribe is a tall South Indian man called Ganapathi who comes dragging his heavy trunk behind him to take down VV's memoirs.

The novel is a mix of Indian mythology with history.Would give the book a 10/10 in theme- the plot leaves you with a reminiscent feeling.

Other books Ive been meaning to read for a while..and finally gotten down to ..
-The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck- A family saga that starts with the tale of a young man who builds a family and an empire in the middle of 20th century China. A capturing tale set against a dynamic background.
- A Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez-Again a tale of a small town Macondo set some where in Latin America and the saga of the Buenida family. The book goes through a span of a hundred years in everyday events without making it seem boring at all.
Unlike the Harry Pottter style of relation of magical beings and spells and incidents, this book talks about the most everyday incidents in such a bizzare manner but still makes it seem true.
Like for example - the curious character of Remedios- the beauty famed accross countries around who is totally unaware of her own beauty that causes men to die! She leaves the story by floating off to heaven in the middle of the garden. Bizzare - I know, but seems true in context.
Critics call this style magical realism.

And many more books.. ive been reading are on the side. I would highly reccomend them and if youre in the mood for some quality reading, do let me know, I can lend you a copy.
This is one great thing about a small city, theres plenty of time to leisurely read a book!

still here..

2006-11-21T08:58:00.000+01:00

Havent been here in a while. But still alive.

In the meanwhile, I have not a clue about where the time went.
There are probably things to blog about- but will do when I have a little more time.
Last weekend, I went here- Just off the range of cellphone network providers- I had a lovely weekend with rock climbing, rappeling, barbeques and a whole lot of fun.

Back to J rearing to go. Have a big event on the 29th to make happen that will determine the course of where things go.
Keeping fingers and toes crossed.This week is an only work week.

Maybe Ill be more interesting next week.
Will post then.

The man behind it all

2006-10-11T06:31:00.002+02:00

On October the 18th in the middle of the ocean there were terrific tremors.Some thought it was an earthquake, some thought different.
Here's a little glimpse at the man behind it all:
If North Korean leader Kim Jong II were to tell his countrymen that the world is flat they would believe it without doubt.

Some facts about this man..
Quirky Kim

-Kim Jong-il's official biography also holds that his birth at Mount Paektu was foretold by a swallow, and that his birth was heralded by the appearance of a double rainbow over the mountain and a new star in the heavens.
- It is believed that his official birth year was adjusted so he would be seen to be 50 at the time of his father's eightieth birthday.
- Kim Jong Il uses at least two look- alikes at some public events for his safety, according to South Korea’s Yonhap news agency. They are so similar in appearance to the reclusive leader that even North Korean officials accompanying them don't know they are doubles.
- Kim, who commands a strong cult of personality and is revered as a demigod in his totalitarian state, also sends the doubles when his health is bad and he doesn't want to look weak in front of his people.
- The look-alikes had plastic surgery and were trained to speak and behave like Kim. They are of the same age, same height and with the same bouffant hairstyle and pot belly as Kim, the officials were quoted as saying.
- In 1992, Kim Jong-il's voice was broadcast for the first and only time. During a military parade, he approached the microphone and said "Glory to the heroic soldiers of the People's Army!"
- His eldest son, Kim Jong-nam, was earlier believed to be the designated heir, but he was arrested at the Tokyo International Airport in 2001 while traveling on a forged passport, trying to sneak into Tokyo Disneyland.
- Kim is said to be a film fan, and reportedly avidly follows Friday The 13th series and Rambo among others.
-He has a profound fear of flying, and has always traveled by private armoured train for state visits to Russia and China.
- He is said to wear platform shoes and favour a bouffant hairstyle in order to appear taller than his 5 feet 3 inches.

For more amazing facts about this character, see here.

Ego Googling

2006-10-04T08:02:00.001+02:00

The classic multicoloured Google logo has now turned personal!

Now the power of Google, or at least its logo, can be yours.

Go here and type in your own name. You’ll see. It gives “ego Googling” a whole new meaning.

Back to work blues

2006-10-03T08:25:00.000+02:00

Its only Tuesday after a long and relaxing weekend- but Im already waiting for the next one. My weekend starts on Thursday this time :)

So please, no calls, no messages- I shall be chilling on the beaches of Goa..
Can hardly wait!!

2006-09-27T15:49:00.000+02:00