tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-175128462009-03-01T12:43:01.449-06:00R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.comBlogger405125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-64998013875058894222008-09-19T22:30:00.019-05:002008-09-27T11:23:22.354-05:00

OK, I need a real man. I need a whole man. What good does it do me to have yet another person who isn't all there in my life. If you're not 100% behind me, then I don't need you behind me at all. It would also be nice if you lived in a building that wasn't strangely joined to another, very similar looking building.I admit I've had this one for a while. Never could figure out what to write. Not

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-10680630495462987872008-09-17T19:46:00.001-05:002008-09-18T19:57:50.675-05:00

Point 1: IF you happen to find one of the very few women in this worold who are impressed by a pic of you "chugging", it is unlikely that they will be impressed if said "chugging is iced tea, even if you do have lemon on it.Point 2: Most women, in seeing multiple pictures of you, taken on different days, would like to see evidence that you have more than one style of t-shirt.Point 3: IF you do

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-23086380319824943992008-09-16T21:21:00.002-05:002008-09-16T21:33:34.135-05:00

I think you would like a guy like me. I'm really nice, I swear. But, if being a nice guy isn't enough, I have another little secret. See, I'm a Jedi. I know you thought Jedis were only in movies, but we're not. So I can do some really cool Jedi shit like make stuff levitate and all that. Plus dead Jedis come back and talk to me, which is really cool. When was the last time you went out with a guy

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-69929836705318958182008-09-15T20:34:00.005-05:002008-09-16T21:03:28.876-05:00

...and to the guys who keep sending me messages, no I will not introduce you to any of the girls. Yes, I know they are attractive. Yes I know that there is something for just about anyone in this picture. Heck, even I am attracted to a couple of these girls. But, honestly, don't you think it's a bit rude to respond to MY personal ad asking if I'll hook you up with another woman. Well, regardless

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-87137360149295250962008-09-14T21:07:00.003-05:002008-09-14T21:15:21.877-05:00

I know a lot of ladies worry about size, but size isn't everything. Frankly I'm proud of it regardless of the size. Sure there are bigger out there, but this one is plenty big. I am quite sure it would be enough to fill you up. Besides, if it's not, we'll just throw in a potato, and some rolls. What? You don't like a potato with your fish?I seriously have to ask: What is it with these guys and

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-69687506624601269052008-09-13T21:03:00.004-05:002008-09-14T21:07:10.042-05:00

"i must be the devil, everyone who is supposed to go out with me on here, either them or their best friend ends up in the hospital that same day/time. so if i were you i would click no lol...the hospitals must be loaded to capacity! ruth, keep dreamin"I would say Ruth may be one really lucky chick.

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-70257856082368430812008-09-12T21:51:00.003-05:002008-09-12T21:58:19.993-05:00

... Also you should be aware that, in addition to being a strict vegetarian, I believe sincerely in only eating foods produced locally. By locally I mean within 50 feet of my kitchen. As a result, I grow most of my own food. I do, however, live in an apartment, which does limit what I can grow somewhat. So if you cannot accept the fact I eat my houseplants, and those of my neighbors, then perhaps

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-41478703822225704622008-09-11T20:54:00.003-05:002008-09-11T21:05:23.186-05:00

I am a little confused by the replies to my ad. I do not understand why you ladies keep saying it's "so cute" that someone "like me" has an ad. What do you mean "like me". And while I appreciate being told I am "special" I don't get exactly why so many people who reply to my ad point that out. It's also real puzzling that so many of you ask if my "mommy" helped me write my ad or my replies when

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-87520133904768950322008-09-10T20:57:00.003-05:002008-09-10T21:04:00.909-05:00

I'm looking for a new woman. I had a woman, but she's, um, gone now. No, I haven't seen her. I swear I have no idea where she is. I had a woman before her too, but I don't know where she is either. Honestly, I have no clue! In fact, I have no idea where the last 32 women I have been with are. None of them! Why are you harassing me? I'm not posting anything else without an attorney present!You

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-11321051849084916682008-09-09T20:36:00.002-05:002008-09-09T20:44:14.530-05:00

I am obviously a Bad Boy. You doubt me? Just look at this picture. It says right there "Bad Boy". And I have a skull and crossbones there next to my head. That is clearly a sign of a man who is not to be messed with. You know what else proves I'm bad? Look at the glittering stars around my head. That's another thing only a tough guy could have. And, of course, they only let the toughest of the

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-81425994445357394582008-09-08T20:49:00.003-05:002008-09-08T20:56:17.382-05:00

Basically I am up for anything. Whatever it will take to get you to go out with me, I'll do. Want me to pay for dinner? Done. Want to go to a movie? You got it. Want me to stand out in a field, put on a fake pregnancy belly, cover it with a vest made out of a garbage sack and let you glue saltines all over my face and body? No problem. What's it going to take to get a date? More importantly,

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-17417821227903003492008-09-07T20:33:00.007-05:002008-09-09T19:15:07.532-05:00

I am a simple girl and oh so innocent. I like to spend a lot of time in my bedroom just playing with my stuffed animals. I just looooooove my stuffed animals. And oh do they love me. They really love me. You have no idea how much they love me. In fact, I am really wondering if I'll be able to find a man who loves me as well as they do. Now if they weren't always so soft.Thanks to the anonymous

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-33460867885865056512008-09-06T20:49:00.005-05:002008-09-06T20:57:16.110-05:00

"my name is cameron and i like to party, drink, and mingle with the men... absolutly love to lick from toes to nose and like to be slapped with the man sausage! i wear thongs and heels if you want! i will lick under your balls for crack"Poor Cameron. He really must have pissed someone off for them to post his pic with this text. Unless, of course, this was really posted by Cameron, in which case

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-86683183434435050552008-09-05T21:14:00.004-05:002008-09-06T12:28:33.527-05:00

I like big sluts and I cannot lie.You other brothers can't deny.When a girl walks in and grinds on your groin,And makes you spring your loins,You get a really goofy ass grin on your face and look like a total tool because no woman wants to go out on a date with some moron who poses with what, were it not for the lack of a t-back, looks like a stripper giving him a lap danceAs sluts go she's not

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-21606262924042900032008-09-04T20:20:00.003-05:002008-09-04T20:27:42.237-05:00

I have to be honest, I was going to write a dork/geek/midget related ad here, given the picture of one guy posing like a dork with a friend pretending to be a midget standing on a garbage can. But let's be honest, there is little I can ad that would be worthwhile given the fact that, for some reason, this gentleman felt it would be a good way to attract a date.Hey, at least it's not another

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-22674516696493242008-09-03T20:14:00.002-05:002008-09-03T20:20:18.852-05:00

OK, I am just going to comment quickly on what is obviously wrong with this picture. Yes, you guessed it. It's the cropping. Can you please explain to me why it is so hard for people to actually crop out white space and the like from the pics for their ads? It honestly cannot take that much effort. How on earth can someone expect to get a date from an ad which such a sloppy ad.Oh, and being a

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-78293121276932801822008-09-02T20:35:00.001-05:002008-09-02T20:38:58.026-05:00

I'm a pretty pretty princess!I'm sure you are.

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-84780657717694118222008-09-01T20:33:00.001-05:002008-09-01T20:37:20.554-05:00

I had a girlfriend, but she broke up with me. I was pretty sad. She used to have a dog. She doesn't have a dog anymore. I'm not so sad anymore either. I'm sure that's just a coincidence. So, you want to go out with me? Do you have a dog?It was just too easy.

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-28719002514109854442008-08-31T21:28:00.004-05:002008-08-31T21:41:11.233-05:00

Hi, I'm Eric Stratton, Rush Chairman. Damn glad to meet you!That was Eric Stratton, Rush Chairman. He was damn glad to meet you!

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-85847785903442270162008-08-30T20:11:00.003-05:002008-08-30T20:17:08.580-05:00

"Hi i'm very romantic lovin guy, just been dumped by a girl who i loved so much for 2 years...she turned to b a slut.....any1 wanna talk kmon ill make u happy hehe neva get bored wit me girl xxx mwaa"I find most "romantic lovin guy"(s) call their exes "slut", don't you? Plus, it kinda sounds like the ex did get a little bored.

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-70710244474587910692008-08-29T20:41:00.002-05:002008-08-29T20:51:16.376-05:00

Every woman knows that one sure way to know if a man is worth trusting is to see how he is with kids and animals. Well, I don't have any pictures with kids, but, as you can see, dogs love me! In fact, this dog just kept following me. I guess he really loved me or something. He wanted to play too. Dang thing kept playfully tugging at my pant leg, Sure he got a little rough, and I needed a few

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-52979170711731666182008-08-28T20:27:00.002-05:002008-08-28T20:32:02.053-05:00

Say hello to my little friend.OK, Maybe not so little...

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-19013030591432421752008-08-27T20:18:00.002-05:002008-08-27T20:27:55.331-05:00

Want my attention? I bet you can figure out how to get it. I could say I want poetry and roses, but I'd be lying. I could say I want wine and romance, but that wouldn't be honest either. Heck, I could just say that I want to hug and hold hands but you'd never believe me. No, what I want is simple. I want respect. Really! Why don't you believe me?I wonder how long it takes her to earn that much.

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-69448920482259211312008-08-26T20:45:00.003-05:002008-08-26T20:52:18.937-05:00

I give you my heart on a plastic plate. Take it my love and let us dance the dance of romance. What's that you say? This picture is dorky? What do I hear? Drawing in a heart makes me look like a fool? I feel for you my poor dreamgirl for you have become jaded to the world of romance. Let me reintroduce you to this special joy. If you like, I can even improve some pictures of the two of us

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17512846.post-80750997023018341182008-08-25T20:38:00.002-05:002008-08-25T20:48:45.677-05:00

OK, I'm a woman, and when people say we "glisten" or "perspire", they are so full of crap. When I'm out dancing in a hot club I sweat. In fact, I sweat like a pig! But, don't worry. First, I check regularly for odor. Plus I make it a serious point of making sure I not only put on plenty of deodorant before I go out, but I keep some in my purse. All I am saying is that we'll be OK and you won't be

R. U. Seriousnoreply@blogger.com0