Blog Fountain

2005-10-18T13:51:00.000-07:00

The English language has taken a beating these last few years with the advent of "liketalk"... I don't know what else to call it. What I thought was a passing fad - the typical American teenagers interjection of the word "like" into every single sentence - has become an epidemic. Even thirty year olds and business executives talk this way! "Like" is used not only as "um" is used (a chronic audible pause) it actually takes the place of adjectives, nouns, imagination and intelligence. For instance, you no longer have to say "She was mad at me". You just say, "She was like "aaaaaghh!" No need for such tedious sentences as "He said, I'll take care of it". Now it's "He's like I'll take care of it". There's no past tense anymore. The characterization of any event; past, present or future, relevant or irrelevant is summed up as "LIKE" We are fast approaching the deterioration of our rich language. I'm perfectly aware that the English language is a conglomerate of many different tongues and ideas but do we need to water it down with words that are vague and useless?

2005-10-11T10:57:00.000-07:00

When parents don't parent. Have you noticed some of these self-important parents that care more about themselves than thier own children? One of the first signs is appearance. You've seen them; these mothers (sometimes fathers) who are decked out in designer clothing while they drag thier children all around the mall dressed like shit. They are either dirty or sloppy. I know what you're thinking; they are kids and they will only wind up messing up thier clothes anyway. That I do agree with but when I was growing up I had two sets of clothing: school clothes and play clothes; and I was poor! After school, I undressed and ran outside ready to tear another hole in my play clothes. When my mother took me somewhere, back into my good clothes. My mother felt that her child should always look thier best even if she couldn't herself. I am now the same way with my son. I will continue to wear the same fucked up Uptowns just as long as my son looks presentable. Remember, your children are a reflection of you and your lifestyle. If your kid is dressed like shit, curses and is cruel to animals we all know who to point the finger at.

2005-10-05T09:07:00.000-07:00

WTF is this? Can someone please tell me? For the past decade or so we've been calling them minivans; yet there is nothing "mini" about them. They keep getting larger and larger so they can accommodate these jobless soccer moms who have nothing better to do than to drive their ever-increasing litter of rugrats around town. They don't make 'em like they used to. My grandfather owned a '78 Ford Econoline 150. This was a real van. It was made better and could tear through today's vans like they were made of aluminum foil. It didn't have seats for extra passengers; just two in the front. Those who bummed a ride sat on the floor, got knocked around like a pinball and liked it. It finally was put out of commission in '95. That van took almost 17 years to die. As soon as my uncle "inherited" it, it was all downhill from there. You can pretty much say it died with my grandfather. Today you're lucky if you get 7 years out of an automobile. Before I trail off the subject I just wanted to make a point of how today's vans (and cars) are made like shit. Remember the A-Team van? That was also a real van. Imagine B.A. Baracus driving a minivan. Did someone say Gay Team?

2005-09-30T11:24:00.000-07:00

Children today are soft. Yeah, that includes your kid too. Today we strap helmets and kneepads on our children hoping they wont fall down and hurt themselves. Big fuckin deal! Thats what kids do; fall. Who the fuck is your kid that they are too important to get hurt? Falling down is a metaphor for life. You fall down; learn to pick yourself up. When we try and protect our children from simply falling on the ground we are taking away thier ability to teach themselves self-reliance. We have come a long way in the past century; and not in a good way either. Remember when a 12 yr old could milk a cow, shoot a rabbit for dinner, work in a sweatshop or coal mine and still find time for homework? What happened to these kids? Today's kids suck. They are soft and bitch about everything under the sun. My son just turned 5 and I noticed because his mother spoils him, he has become dependent. I am currently working to remedy that. He needs to learn to do for himself and hopefully he'll thank me when he's older.

Do your kids a favor. Don't kiss thier boo-boos, don't use training wheels and let them eat thier Halloween candy dammit!