Sports at Random

Rap at Random

2008-08-19T11:30:00.000-07:00

As all of my reader(s) know, I love rap about sports.

So, because of that love, I must re-distribute (AKA blatantly re-post other people's hard-earned content) this quick rap about LeBron James from over a year ago, but just now making its rounds on the Internets.

The biggest Sports Talk Radio Show in Los Angeles (possibly the biggest radio market if you cede that people in New York are on public transportation and don't get the radio) had it's main host and co-host, basically, not believe in LeBron. But it was soo much more than not believing; they belittled him.

So this had to happen to them:

Link to file

We all should learn something from CAVSBOARD.com. Your eyes don't lie. Admit to greatness when you see it or can see it coming. Admit to reason. Stop being unreasonable, even if you think it creates "ratings". "PTI" works because Wilbon and Kornheiser are good together, not because they disagree all the time (which they don't). That's why I don't watch "Around the Horn" or anything Skip Bayless does. Someone has told them to just dissent to whatever is reasonable because it gets good ratings. Although there is some point to that (intelligent and thoughtful, yet passionate discussion of differing sides is good TV or Radio), but that LA Radio Host (Steve Hartman) just differs from the norm for the hell of it. It is almost unlistenable at times when he tries to corner people for any statement they make, when the public can clearly tell what is meant.

Wake at Random

2008-08-19T09:39:00.000-07:00

There have obviously been millions upon millions of wishes by the living about what to do with their corpse when they have died. Some want to be buried with a loved one, some want a closed casket, others want to be cremated- and then there is Angel Pantoja Medina of San Juan, Puerto Rico.

Angel was a 24-year-old who apparently knew he was going to die soon. So when his body was found dead underneath a bridge, his family immediately knew what to do with it- and they honored his last wish.

He wanted to stand up during his entire wake. So he did- for 3 days, in his mother's small, government sponsored apartment. It's the way Stephen Hawking wants to go now, too.

The owner of the Marin Funeral Home told the AP that Angel was embalmed with a special embalming fluid that allowed him to stand upright, just leaning against the wall.

Angel did not want to be dressed in your typical suit, though. As you can see, Angel has on what probably is an Ed Hardy knock-off T-Shirt with the long white sleeves underneath (you know you rocked this same look in 8th grade). He also has on his Dolce and Gabbana sunglasses, silver cross necklace, and to top it off, a New York Yankees hat. Sadly, though, this was just one last prank his brother Carlos played on poor Angel.

You see, Angel was a huge Red Sox fan.

The police are still investigating his murder.

Olympics at Random

2008-08-15T11:35:00.000-07:00

The two best players on the United States Men's Basketball Team could also be the downfall of the team's Gold Medal hopes.

Everyone knows LeBron James and Kobe Bryant can create for themselves. In fact, creating something out of nothing is when they are at their best. Driving to the hole and pulling up, going to the rim, or dishing to a teammate for an open layup when the offense is stagnant is their best quality.

But their worst quality is during the same exact situation, when they do not attack, but rather pull up; often a 20-foot 2-point shot. This shot, in all aspects of basketball- from my Rec League Team, to Syracuse basketball, to the NBA, to the Olympics- just infuriates me. I can take it when the Cavs have passed the ball around for 20 seconds (more likely LeBron has dribbled the ball at the top of the key for 20 seconds and Varejao is running up to set a pick) and now there's no time left on the shot clock- yes, then I understand you can jack it up. I even understand Kobe wanting to be part of the scoring offense after he's dished out 3 assists in the 1st quarter. I get that. But can you please tell me why LeBron and Kobe insist on pulling up from 20 feet, with a defender in their face, with 15 seconds left on the shot clock, when Chris Paul is open on top, ready to set up a play?

A great example of how this can literally lead to the demise of your team is Andre Iguodala (the new $80 million man) in the 2008 NBA Playoffs. Now I'm not trying to compare his shooting ability with Kobe's, or even LeBron's, but the concept is the same. In the first 3 games of the playoffs, Andre shot 7 for 33 (including 0-6 from 3-point range), a brilliant 21%. However, the Sixers won 2 of those games. In the following games, he continued to shoot even more. Many times, especially in the pivotal Game 4 in Philly, he would shot some off-balance 18-foot jumper early in the shot clock. I understand he wanted to become the Man on this team, but when he had other guys carrying the scoring burden (Andre Miller was playing great and should have controlled the ball even more), Iguodala should have just concentrated on Defense and distributing the ball. The Sixers ended up losing the next 3 games and were eliminated. Iguodala's shot eventually fell in the last two games, but it didn't matter because he had tried to assert himself into the offense by taking bad, long, guarded jumpers in Game 4. It was excruciating for me to watch- and I'm not even a Philly fan.

And it's not even the selfishness that gets to me- I don't mind that, Kobe and LeBron are the two best players in the world- it's just a sincere hatred on my part for taking a shot that you have no business taking, especially on a team with Chris Bosh and Carmelo Anthony- not Ben Wallace and Wally Szczerbiak. It is purely inexcusable. Move the ball. Everyone on this team can play and create. Don't be a ball stopper, and even worse, don't jack up stupid shots.

And this is what I think could lead to their downfall. Yes, Boeheim has apparently not taught anyone, including re-teaching Carmelo, how to play zone defense, and yes, even open 3's and free throws haven't exactly been falling- but this awful decision making from your two top minute-getters is what could be the difference between a single-digit game against Lithuania or Argentina or a loss against them.

Not that I actually think this team will ever lose- but Coach K still has some coaching to do.

photo via dunkonu's Flickr

Mike and the Mad Dog at Random

2008-08-15T11:12:00.000-07:00

It's a sad day in Gotham.

Olympics at Random

2008-08-14T16:07:00.000-07:00

Due to the current popularity of Olympic Gymnastics, I decided to do a list of the TOP GYMNASTICS MOVIES OF ALL-TIME.

And, without further ado... here's the list:

Come on, I've never seen a Gymnastics movie- get off me! And Footloose and Bring It On (which have Gymnastics aspects to them) do not count.

But if YOU want to make a list, go watch:

1) Stick It

2) American Anthem

3) Flying/Dream to Believe/Teenage Dream - starring a pre-"Wonder Years" Olivia D'Abo and a young...
Ohhh! Damn, Keanu!

You can basically find that whole movie here: YouTube

But who can resist... a GYMNASTICS OFF!

Olympics at Random

2008-08-11T15:21:00.000-07:00

Being in Beijing right now is surely a crazy time for an American Athlete. Especially one as internationally revered as Kobe Bean Bryant.

So it's somewhat understandable that Kobe forgot one of his greatest sporting accomplishments when commenting on his recent game against China:

"I am fortunate enough to have played in four NBA finals and numerous big games but it was just different. You felt like there was so much more support because it's the USA and obviously how proud the fans are here of their country."

Now I'm not sure which one of his 5 NBA Finals appearances Kobe is "forgetting" about- but I'm going with one of the last two.

And probably the last one.

Tennis at Random

2008-07-30T15:52:00.000-07:00

At last month's Wimbledon, sisters Venus and Serena Williams faced each other once again in the Final. But in more important news to me, which somehow I had not realized yet, Venus and Serena Williams are Jehovah's Witnesses. It came up in an interview about why they cannot vote, although they support, presumptive Democratic Nominee Barack Obama.

Now I've lived next door to Jehovah's Witnesses, so it really surprised me that Venus...

and Serena Williams...

are...

Jehovah's Witnesses.

Imagine that knocking at your door.

Now I guess there are no rules against photo shoots and on-court fashions like these, but I do think there's one thing where Serena Williams just went too far- As a Jehovah's Witness you cannot vote, amongst many other rules, including not being able to celebrate Christmas. So, I just thought her support of the Grinch was a little out of line.

Thoughts at Random

2008-07-02T10:48:00.000-07:00

- The rumors are true: Mike Francesa will be leaving The Fan, splitting up the most successful sports radio duo in history- and heading to Cleveland to host a local sports talk show. The Program Director of the Cleveland station has been letting people go for years and has not signed any big names to long term deals, instead just going the syndication route. Francesa was asked why he would take a pay cut, leave his hometown, leave a station that was contending for the best station in the country- and take this job, and Francesa responded, "LeBron James is gonna do it in a couple years, right? So why shouldn't I?"

- I don't know what is worse- having Manny Ramirez push down the Traveling Secretary and the following George Costanza jokes or the United States' top two track stars named "Gay" and "Hooker".

- I don't understand why everyone is saying Baron Davis to the Clippers doesn't mean anything- that the Clippers will still be bad. People- Elton Brand was hurt last year. There was no PG. The team was a mess. Now they have a healthy Brand, a great PG coming off his most injury-free season, a rising Sophomore who developed possibly more than any other Rookie last year, a Center who has developed into a very solid double-double guy, and a decent, not good, but decent bench. They are not adding Davis to the team from last year. They are adding him to a much better team- one with one of the most solid post presences in the League. The Clippers could easily get the 4 seed this next season. Easily.

NBA at Random

2008-06-18T22:18:00.000-07:00

- James Posey is the new Robert Horry. Or at least he could be. Whether he re-signs with the Celtics or do what every Laker fan is talking about and sign with them for 5 years and $30 million, he's got a great chance to get another ring next year.

- Did you notice Sam Cassell chasing after the game-ball at the end of the game yesterday? Big Baby launched the ball high into the air while the extra-terrestrial point guard was running at him. Cassell followed its trajectory as chaos ensued on the floor and pushed some teenagers out of the way to get to it as it bounced over the scorer's table. Then ABC cut to another shot and I never found out who got the ball. I'm assuming Sam did, though.

- Not to sound like Seinfeld here, but what was the deal with Paul Pierce sucking on the Larry O'Brien trophy? He was like deep tongue-kissing it in the locker room. It was just a bit weird. It was a series between teams from the only two states that allow gay marriage, though, so... you never know- it's a slippery slope.

MLB at Random

2008-06-18T12:15:00.000-07:00

The Angels always like to keep a spare helmet around just in case Barry Bonds signs with them as a DH.

I had the pleasure of attending Willie Randolph's last game as Manager of the Mets on Monday.

Poor, Willie. He thought the moves he was making this game actually meant something.

A guy who acted like this game actually meant nothing was Pedro Martinez. It was kind of refreshing, I'm not criticizing him. He was the life of the dugout.

Pedro was actually messing with some 5-year-old in a Mets jersey. It was probably funny to that kid, but the rest of the adults around just thought Pedro was being really strange.

Another strange thing was that every time the Mets got the third out, a mad rush of kids would crowd right into our seats and yell at Carlos Delgado to throw them the ball (since Carlos usually had the ball).

But what the strange thing was, was that someone from the dugout would throw Delgado a ball and he would switch the game ball out for that ball and throw the ball from the dugout into the crowd. Weird. Anyway, Carlos stopped throwing the ball into the stands after he struck out and grounded out (he ended up going 0-4 with 2 K's. Classic Carlos).

So what ended up happening was this mass of people leaning against the dugout and continuing to yell at Delgado or anyone else to throw something at them. This made the security guard mad.

This power hungry douche would climb out of the dugout between each half-inning and just start yelling at 7-year-olds to go back to their seat. Come on, Man- these little kids who have enough money to live in Orange County and have great seats to Angels games just want one good thing in their life. Let them lean over and look at these players. They'll never have another chance like this... until the A's come into town next week.

THE FANS

The guy with his last name on the back of his jersey...

The guy who wears any sort of shirt about Baseball to the Baseball game, whether or not it has anything to do with the two teams playing.

Not only do we have Jort wearing friends, but the one has the cell phone clip on his pocket. I didn't think those existed anymore.

And then, finally, my most hated part of Angels' Games... the Rally Monkey. I would eradicate this if I had just one wish. I mean, other than wishing for an infinite number of wishes.

And somehow, everyone in the crowd seemed to have them.

Thoughts at Random

2008-06-16T10:56:00.000-07:00

- If I hear one person mention the words "Willis Reed" and "Tiger Woods" in the same sentence this week, I'm going to light myself on fire.

- I can't help it. I told you so.

- I don't really think I'm going out on a limb here, but I'm going with... Brook Lopez = BUST.

- Here in LA, Laker fans are absolutely going crazy. Not "crazy" like cheering and happy, but "crazy" like this series is wrapped up... for them. In 7. In Boston.

- Speaking of Los Angeles, we need to seriously consider making rules for TIVO and telling people when they can and cannot tell people about what has happened on a sports game, sitcom, reality show, or whatever.

Last night I emerged from a play (I had TIVO'ed the game) and one usher was just shouting - "The Lakers won! Celtics lose!" for no reason. We had just watched Glinda and Elphaba sing to each other, possibly a very touching moment for some, and the usher thought it was a good idea to let everyone know what had happened in the game. Thanks, Dick.

First off, these were people going to see a PLAY. A PLAY. Not at the Dodgers game or a Kings game, not even at a comedy show- it was a freakin' PLAY. The majority of these people get hungry when you mention the word "Kobe", not think of one of the greatest players of our time. I don't think they cared enough to walk right out of the show and hear what happened.

And second, on that topic, way to ruin the show for these people, Douche. These nice old ladies just saw a great Musical and want to talk about it and they get bum-rushed by Lakers news- You are an usher at Pantages Theater, not a security guard at Staples! The old ladies were so confused, they were still in the Land of Oz, they didn't know what was going on.

And last, but certainly not least- I TIVO'ed the game, ASS. I turned my cell phone off, didn't check it at intermission, stayed far away from any person that said words like "Ball" even though they were talking about the dance they just saw or words like "Perkins" even though they were talking about where they were going for dinner after the show. I managed to ignore every one and every thing and all I had left was a straight shoot down Hollywood Blvd. back home, ignoring random Homeless Men in Lakers jerseys, the blonde-black midget, and Tom Petty Spiderman- or anyone else who talks to me.

I, too, have let the proverbial cat out of the bag before, once telling a friend "Oh, you missed that last 'Office' where they kissed at the end?", so I know both sides of this. And I have since tried my best to understand that you cannot tell anyone anything about anything on TV unless you preface it with "Did you watch... (blank)... yet?" I don't care if it is Game 7 of the NBA Finals or the 3rd episode of the 5th season of Tila Tequila, I don't talk about anything on TV to anyone.

And that should be your rule now, too.

NBA at Random

2008-06-12T21:02:00.000-07:00

Coaching was supposed to be the huge edge the Lakers had over the Celtics in this Series. Bigger than anything else. Personnel was a push, bench was possibly slightly to the Lakers- But Phil "9 Rings" Jackson against Doc Rivers? That's the definition of a mismatch.

But almost everything Doc has done in this Series has worked. Meanwhile, Phil Jackson has appeared to be the one who has never been in a Finals before.

Lamar Odom finally put together the half of his playoff life. The Lakers have a huge lead, Odom is hitting every shot he takes- so what does Phil do? He allows practically every member of the team to jack up 3's and, even worse, allows Kobe to try to "get in the game".

Now I know Phil Jackson is not supposed to be a great in-game coach. He does his job in-between games, through the media- not in time-outs. But when your team stops running your precious offense and you and no one else on your team tells Kobe Bryant to stop taking on Paul Pierce one-on-one because he feels "challenged"- YOU ARE NOT DOING YOUR JOB.

Kobe Bryant had 3 points at half-time and the Lakers were up 18. This kind of thing happens often- the Lakers get a lead with Kobe not putting up great stats, although definitely having an effect on the game by just being out there and defenders having to worry about him. But then Kobe often forces his shot in the 2nd Quarter, or in this case, the 2nd Half.

Kobe's favorite play seems to be to hold the ball and then elevate over his defender and take a 21-footer. This is the worst possible shot in all of basketball- and the Lakers take dozens of these shots per game, but especially Kobe. Phil Jackson needs to not let these things go- this is the Finals. No more letting his team play it out, no more lessons- there is no more time. He needs to step up and do his job.

Phil's need to be more proactive still won't fix some of his personnel decisions, such as the previously mentioned ruining of Lamar Odom's confidence. Lamar was +6 for the game. He was the spark plug for he team's huge lead- but Kobe's insistence to dominant the ball took Lamar out of the game. He's had Lamar on his team for 3 years- he knows the guy loses concentration if he isn't involved. So push the ball into Lamar- tell him to go after it. Post him up against James Posey. Stop letting Kobe try fade-aways against Paul Pierce and scream at him to feed Lamar.

Another personnel decision that had me shaking my head was the disappearance of Derek Fisher. He sat for over 12 minutes from the end of the 3rd to the last 2 minutes of the 4th- with 2nd year player Jordan Farmar running the point as the Celtics went from down 11 to up 5 (a huge 16 point swing). Again, Phil, not the time to teach the young fella a lesson. Yes, maybe it will help him out in the future, but this is the Finals. Win or go home. Put in the veteran to steady the ship before you lose the lead.

I won't even mention the 2 time-outs used at the end of the game to get the ball to half-court because he literally was too lackadaisical to get up and the Lakers needed to in-bound the ball or get a 5-second call. And I won't even mention he left in Sasha Vujacic for much of the 2nd Half, despite building the lead with the likes of Trevor Ariza because I understand Phil was looking to spread the floor. I won't mention those things.

So now the Lakers are forced to win 3 games in a row, with 2 in Boston. It shouldn't take 4 games into the Finals for the highest paid coach in the League to open his eyes. And Phil could wake up for Game 5... but I'm afraid it's too late.

NBA at Random

2008-06-09T11:38:00.000-07:00

A Laker Flag on a 2008 bright blue Prius flew at half-mass today as it inched ahead on the 405. It's a common sight in the City, la Ciudad.

But, being Laker Fans, they still are confident (and/or think there is a conspiracy to have this series go 7). And they should be. The Boston Celtics' supreme power this year was playing with a lead- and keeping it. And although they did keep this huge lead, they let it get down to the ridiculous one-possession difference. They were the A-Rod's of the NBA, they would get a 10 point lead and make it 20. They could shoot 60% with a 15 point lead, but only 40% if it was tied.

And now they not only have to go to Los Angeles, but their impenetrable skill of maintaining huge leads is gone. Call it a chink in their armor or call it still a 2-0 lead, the Celtics are in for a different Laker team come Tuesday.

Thoughts at Random: NBA Finals Edition

2008-06-05T17:17:00.000-07:00

- Jack Nicholson allegedly paid $75,000 for floor seats to tonight's game. Damn. Just damn. Jack, just make a movie with a company owned by Disney and ABC will just give you the tickets. Come on, Jack. This is a recession.

- If Kobe Bean Bryant takes over in Game 1 or Game 2, get ready for a plethora of "'Bean'-town" headlines. Very creative, People. Very.

- Paul Pierce has been way too happy to "just be here" in the Finals. He acted like he won the Championship after beating the Pistons. Now, I don't normally think stuff like that matters because when you get on the floor, all that other stuff doesn't matter... BUT... he's got to be the go to guy in this series. He needs to not be content to make it here. So, I'm not saying it's going to matter, but I'm going to watch Pierce, the usual Laker-killer, very closely.

NBA at Random

2008-06-04T15:00:00.000-07:00

Larry Bird = Master of the Obvious

Take a listen to some of the gems from The Hick From French Lick during that NBA sponsored conference call between Larry Bird and Magic Johnson on Tuesday.

Mr. Bird was asked the question of what he thinks the keys are to this Series. His response was:

Really, Larry? "...who plays the best." That's your expert opinion? Did you suddenly turn into John Madden or something? Hundreds, possibly thousands of reporters are hanging on your every word and this is what you come up with?

Well, maybe he just needs to clarify a little. So, Larry... continue.

Kobe Bryant can hurt the Celtics... really, Larry? That's what you've come up with? The best player in the NBA can hurt his opposing team? I've never thought of it like that. Thanks, Legend.

And, just so it doesn't seem like I took this ridiculously out of context, here is his whole answer, unedited:

That's right. He said "who plays the best" twice. Way to emphasize your point, Larry.

In other news, Larry Bird thinks John McCain is going to win the upcoming Presidential Election. Or Barack Obama.

Definitely one of those two, though.

NBA at Random

2008-06-02T22:22:00.000-07:00

"When we don't know who to hate, we hate ourselves."
- Chuck Palahniuk

Good thing for me, I know who to hate. And one NBA team that seems to have a lot of hatred go their way, from more than just me, is the recently eliminated San Antonio Spurs.

Basketball fans dreaded another Spurs/Pistons Final. But these are two squads that actually play as a team- these are Franchises that Basketball fans should enjoy to watch. But for some reason, people just really hate the Spurs. And being one of those people, I'll tell you why.

I have no problem with the city of San Antonio. Some people may partly hate them for their small-time city, but I don't really think that's it.

I really don't care that they are more of a half-court team than a fast-break team. Some people may hate them for being more of a slow up team, but I really don't think that's it either.

I hate them for them. It's as simple as that. I hate Gregg Popovich, I hate Tim Duncan, I hate Manu Ginobili, I hate Tony Parker, I hate Bruce Bowen- I hate everybody.

Gregg Popovich is a bad man. He basically only got to where he is today because he became best friends with Larry Brown. And then somehow he managed to be named General Manager of the Spurs in 1994. The coach of that team was Bob Hill and he lead the team to 62 wins in 1994-95 and 59 the following year. Then, in the 1996-97 season, the Spurs had a rash of injuries, including the former MVP David Robinson who only played 6 games that year. Bob Hill was unfairly fired after 18 games and, what do you know, the pock-marked General Manager took over.

Popovich proceeded to tank the rest of the season and was rewarded with the 1st Overall pick. And you all know the rest of the story.

Tim Duncan is not just boring. There's much more to hate about him than that. Honestly, he should be beloved. 4 years of College, no kids out of wedlock, fundamentally sound- a model athlete. But he just doesn't seem to fit in, racially speaking, with either whites or blacks. His white, blonde, Barbie Doll-esque wife and vanilla personality makes him not relate to young black kids. And being a 7-foot tall black guy doesn't make it easy fitting in with Whitey either. He's not relatable and, therefore, not marketable. I, literally, know nothing about Tim Duncan. I know what kind of food KG likes, what kind of music AI likes, and pretty much everything about Agent Zero- but I'm not even sure if Duncan likes basketball. He sure complains a lot.

But that might be a residual effect of Popovich, a notoriously rigid arguer and complainer himself. But that's also what makes San Antonio great- the relationship between these two. Almost any other Superstar would have stopped listening to their coach long ago- but Duncan allows Popovich to coach him and all the other players follow suit. It truly is amazing... but that just makes me hate them even more.

Manu Ginobili is the biggest flopper in the League and Tony Parker is a French Guy married to a hot American Actress- they are easy to hate. Bruce Bowen has been known to stick his leg out on opponent's jump shots to make them roll their ankles. Big Shot Bob has been known to, well, ruin your team's playoff chances.

It's not just like the Lakers, where one Superstar or one Coach is so easy to hate- it's the entire team. I bet even their trainers are Douche Bags.

I don't mean to pile on, I truly don't, at this time of possible decline of the Spurs' Empire (as some will say). And I'm not piling on- because the San Antonio Spurs will be fine. They'll come back from this. Hell, they might even win the title next year. Manu Ginobili is balding, not declining in talent. He's at his peak, as is Tony Parker who can get to the hole like none other. Tim Duncan is the only one that is possibly slowing down a little, but his decline is still better than 99% of any other player for the next 5 years.

And with a jerk of a GM/Coach like Popovich, they're bound to get the next Tim Duncan if Tim Duncan ever gets injured.

NBA at Random

2008-05-30T20:51:00.001-07:00

As previously reported by a number of different outlets, after Thursday's Game 5 victory Kobe Bryant rushed out of the arena to go see the movie that is turning future generations of women into old skanks, Sex and the City.

Now, I'm not going to make fun of Kobe for this (although I rebuffed several requests from my live-in girlfriend this weekend to go see this movie) because it's obvious why he had to go. First it was a $4 million ring for having sex with a girl in Colorado, and I'm assuming now it's getting a movie theater to hold a private screening the night before Sex and the City came out for sleeping with a Laker Girl. I'd say Kobe got off easy, especially considering the precedent that had previously been set.

Anyway, here is the audio of Kobe saying where he was going. He was literally getting into his car at Staples Center, immediately after hoisting up the Western Conference Trophy. It was played on the greatest radio show of all time, the Petros and Money Show (PMS), weekdays from 4 - 7 PM on AM 570 in Los Angeles. The voice is that of co-host Matt "Money" Smith (the guy on the right, below. The other guy is a former Captain of the USC Football team. Yes, that's right, that guy on the left was a Division I athlete):

Link to just Kobe clip

Full Hour of PMS (show the sound was recorded for)

NBA at Random

2008-05-30T20:46:00.000-07:00

Kobe Bryant made his 6th First Team All-Defensive Team this year (he also has a couple of Second Team finishes). And I'm not doubting that Kobe Bryant can be a great defender. He can be if he wants to. Hell, I bet if he wants to be a great Garbage Man, he could be that, too.

My only contention with Kobe Bryant is that he really has not been a great defender in these playoffs. He has been floating around the court, helping out other players, and letting his man take and make open shots.

In the Jazz series, Ronnie Brewer would seem to open each game with a series of dunks, all because Kobe was fishing somewhere else on the court. Then in the Spurs Series, Bruce Bowen seemed to get open shot after open shot, shooting 58% for the series.

Yes, the Lakers took care of the Jazz in 6 and the Spurs in even less, but Kobe cannot float around on Defense against the Celtics. He needs to focus. He'll either be guarding Paul Pierce or Ray Allen- neither guy Kobe can leave for a second or else they'll sink a jumper.

Now I never agreed that playing hard on D hurts your offense, as so many sportscasters and sports reporters seem to think, but if it does, the Lakers could be in trouble.

NBA at Random

2008-05-30T20:45:00.000-07:00

It was a great moment in Lakers' history. The Logo, a true Laker Legend, had a real heartfelt moment congratulating the now grown up teen he had traded for a dozen years earlier on a magnificent Western Conference title. Jerry West even beamed with pride as he spoke about the great team his protege, the previously much maligned Mitch Kupchak, had put together. He spoke of the philandering Jerry Buss, who employed him for so many years and what a great organization The Lakers have been.

One name he did not mention, though, was that of Phil Jackson. Coincidence? I think not.

West and Jackson have long rumored to not enjoy each other's company, which was possibly sparked by Jackson. And in this media build-up to the classic Lakers/Celtics match-up, I haven't heard many, including Mr. Clutch, give Mr. Jackson his proper respect. And he deserves some.

I was never a big fan of Phil Jackson. I was on the side that argued he's coached some of the greatest talents of all-time. I contended that giving Kwame Brown some self-discovery philosophical literature does nothing for the team. And neither does splicing Braveheart footage with that of Smush Parker 3-Pointers. I claimed that Jackson was a horrible in-game coach. He often just sat there, never calling a time-out, letting his team "figure it out" on their own. Hey Buddy, that's why you're getting paid $12 mil. Figure it out for them, Jack.

But then something weird happened. Phil Jackson developed a solid rotation. His bench actually had a nickname. They actually knew when they were going in and he stayed true to that. There was no jerking around with Jordan Farmar's minutes (like he did last year), there was no teasing Sasha Vujacic with 25 minute games and then 3 DNP-CD's. He finally, after 3 years, got into Sasha's head that he had to play defense- and it was pretty good defense, too. He used his energy guy, Ronny Turiaf, every game, not just sporadically.

He even dealt with injuries. Andrew Bynum and Pau Gasol missed a large amount of games, but Jackson dealt with it and truly developed this solid bench. Only Kobe, Farmar, and Derek Fisher played in all 82 games this year.

Now, this might not seem too amazing- but look at some of the other teams in these playoffs, including NBA Finals foe, the Boston Celtics. The Head Coaches have not developed a solid rotation yet, and this is well beyond 82 games.

We'll get to Boston in a second, but first let's examine the Lakers' Western Conference Finals opponent, the still, in my opinion, yearly championship contending San Antonio Spurs. Gregg Popovich messed with Kurt Thomas' minutes in the Lakers' series, realizing too late that Robert Horry doesn't have any magic left and not even playing him in the deciding game. Same goes with Jacque Vaughn, whose minutes were replaced by Brent Barry at the back-up PG. And same goes with Ime Udoka. Kobe burned him left and right every time he entered the game and Popovich never gave him the solid minutes that could give him confidence. Or leave him on the end of the bench. Either way. Just be consistent.

And Popovich's opponent in the Quarter-Finals fared no better- and he won Coach of the Year. Byron Scott replaced Hilton Armstrong at the back-up C position with Melvin Ely half-way through the Spurs' series. He messed with rookie Julian Wright's minutes, too, never allowing him to get into a flow.

It seems like this kind of thing shouldn't matter. These guys are getting paid millions of dollars, they should be able to deal with it. But they just can't. Imagine a salesman not knowing when his next customer is coming and only having small, sporadic chances at making a sale. He's not going to do as well as the guy that knows when his time is coming.

But the worst of all, and possibly the worst coach of all, is the Boston Celtics' Doc Rivers. He only has given one bench player solid minutes and that's the new Kobe-stopper, James Posey. At least that's a plus. But everyone else has been getting messed around with- never being able to find a solid rotation, even by the NBA Finals. I can never remember a more inconsistent bench, or a more inconsistent minutes played bench, in Finals History. If Doc Rivers wants anything out of his bench other than James Posey, the Celtics are in trouble. Take a look of the minutes played of some of the other members of Boston's bench:

- Leon Powe was averaging 17.7 minutes a game in the First Round against the Hawks and 18.7 minutes in the first three games against the Cavs in the Second Round. Then, suddenly, in the next ten games, he averaged only 3.6 minutes per game, including not playing in 3 of those playoff games. And he wasn't even playing bad. No one can tell what Doc was thinking.

- Glen Davis has only played in 4 of the last 8 games. Meanwhile, P.J. Brown, who barely played in the Atlanta series, averaged 16.8 minutes in the Detroit Series.

- But the worst thing Doc has done is given the most inconsistent minutes to possibly the most important bench position: the back-up to the extremely young and devastatingly inexperienced Point Guard. Eddie House played 19 minutes a game in that slot during the regular season- the regular season where the Celtics had an .805 winning percentage. During the playoffs he's played 5.6 minutes a game and had 3 DNP-CD's and the Celtics have a .600 winning percentage. That's a wide gap. A wide gap, in part, caused by House's replacement, immobile veteran Sam Cassell. He even had 4 games, the last two Cavs' games and the first two Pistons' games, where he didn't even step onto the court without his sweats. And his last three games go like this: 17 minutes, 2 minutes, 12 minutes. Doc, if you wanted to give Jordan Farmar any more confidence, which seemed impossible to such a cocky kid, you've succeeded.

Now this series may play out that Powe and/or House step up in Game 1 and play consistent minutes throughout the series and this whole argument could all be for naught- but I'm throwing my hat in the ring that says it does make a difference and the Lakers celebrate down Figueroa because of it. Because of Phil Jackson.

2007-11-23T15:05:00.000-08:00

Thoughts at Random

2007-09-22T16:31:00.000-07:00

- Baltimore fans are feeling what Bills fans felt the last few years- that Willis McGahee often seems to not try- often near the end zone. Just watching a couple of Ravens' drives this season- where Willis just stutters as he doesn't know whether to take it outside or smash into the line- it makes me feel like a weight has been lifted off my back- and thrust upon Ravens fans.

- Ian Thomsen of Sports Illustrated recently wrote about Larry Brown and his decision to stay in Philadelphia, instead of going to be an "assistant" under Doc Rivers in Boston (or numerous other college jobs).

Thomsen says at one point in the article: "But his meetings with Snider (76ers owner) and 76ers president Billy King convinced Brown to stay in Philadelphia, where he and wife Shelly are raising their young family."

Larry, you just got like a $40-million buyout from the Knicks- you want to live in Philly? Don't you have a house in Malibu? You can live anywhere you want in the country- in the WORLD even, and you pick Philadelphia? I have nothing against Philly, I like Philly- but come on, Larry. Your kid could've been so much nicer a person.

- I can't watch Jesse Palmer. Not that he's an idiot or anything, I just can't physically look at him. He looks like the epitome of a douche bag. Even the douchiest of the frat boys at Syracuse University or the douchiest wannabe actor I see out at a bar here in LA- they don't compare with Jesse Palmer. I just want to punch him in the face. Yet, I don't hate him- I can't explain it.

- Talked about intensely over 2 months ago, ESPN2 again showed Darren McFadden's pimped out Crown Vic during the Kentucky at Arkansas game on Saturday. Making it on blogs is one thing, but letting ESPN cameras come and film your ride which has at least $10,000 worth of "extras" on it, seems a bit overconfident. Where is D-Mac getting all this money from? As far as I know, his mother has been in jail and was addicted to drugs, but even if someone in his family has money- don't flaunt it like that. I'm not saying he's getting paid- I'm just going to leave saying people in Arkansas take their football seriously.

Rap at Random

2007-09-06T10:03:00.000-07:00

Back in July, I wrote about an underground rapper named "Ja Skillz", who also went by the pseudonym "Daniel-san", the same name I write under.

This "Ja Skillz" berated me in an email in which he demanded that I stop writing under "his" name. We exchanged heated emails and he became more and more interesting to me. Eventually, I asked him for his album and he offered it up to me for the "low price, considering the brilliance, of $35".

As I said back in July, a week after I immediately turned down that offer, he sent me a rap song about Golf. Fantastic.

He also sent me a rap song about the Buffalo Bills. He mentioned in his, I'm assuming, fake bio that he was born in Buffalo, so apparently he has an affinity for the Bills, as well as the Gentlemen's Game.

I haven't heard from "Skillz" in awhile, but the Golf Song and this Bills song, entitled "Norwood Wide Right"- which he called a "slow jam"- have gotten me through a long summer.

First, to preface the song, it was apparently written between 2000 - 2002, during or just after the "Rob Johnson Era".

Wade Phillips fat references, Kent Hull, the Biscuit, Jim Kelly and Rogaine, Ted Marchibroda, Thurman losing his helmet and Andre Reed getting the unsportsmanlike conduct call in the Redskins Super Bowl right before half-time: this song has it all.

"Norwood Wide Right" - Ja Skillz - link to song

NFL at Random

2007-08-30T17:34:00.000-07:00

ESPN's John Clayton recently wrote an article where he compared the Chiefs' Brodie Croyle and the Bills' QB J.P. Losman:

Unless Croyle blows it, he appears to be the starter. To me, the situation looks no different than the J.P. Losman situation last year in Buffalo. Losman struggled with mistakes through camp while the coaching staff initially debated whether to start Kelly Holcomb or Craig Nall. But they ended up giving the job to Losman. By midseason, he grew as a leader, and now the offense is well ahead of the defense in Buffalo. By the way, Croyle looks a little like Losman, for what it's worth.

You be the judge:

Soon after this, Croyle was demoted to 2nd string QB, being replaced by Damon Huard. But back to if they look-a-like or not, Sports at Random's Puja thinks Clayton is crazy:

John Brodie Croyle AKA "JB Croyle" was born in shitsville Alabama (sorry Rainbow City) & has a little "inbred hick" to him with a Ringo Starr-sized schnoz to boot. Meanwhile, JP Losman is from Venice Beach, & has some Mexican & Cherokee ethnicity in his family. In the realm of vicious stereotypes, I'll go with... push.

Style: For his NFL portrait, Croyle is sporting the Losman '04 shag-cut, but that's at least a step up from JP's "fag mustache" (not my words), which was seen around Buffalo last winter. Hopefully for Chief fans, Croyles' 1st season under center is better than that of Jonathan Paul Losman.

JP's portrait (mugshot) brings back memories of Nick Nolte's endless night. All he needs is that oddly out of place Hawaiian shirt & a DWI charge. Is it me or Losman's face swelling along with his build? Better than his ego I guess. It looks like he just got off a 22 hour flight to Tokyo... during which he pounded down 3 salt shakers.

Conclusion: they look about as alike as John Clayton & Sean Salisbury

And I think they both subtly resemble Jon Heder.

But like John Clayton said, this is all just "for what it's worth".

Which, in this case, is absolutely nothing.

Sorry I wasted your time.

Jewish Softball at Random

2007-08-29T23:00:00.000-07:00

Jeffrey Herrmann is a simple man. He's just like you or me. He loves the Yankees, video games, and American History.

But for one day, last Sunday, he became immortal.

Over two decades ago, Jeffrey Herrmann started the Fair Lawn B'nai B'rith Softball League. He was the Pete Rozelle of the FLBBSL- Pete Rozelle combined with Casey Stengel, that is.

You see, for over 20 years, as the manager of the Yamakazi, Jeffrey Herrmann went 0 for forever in Championships. He watched each and every year as another manager reaped the rewards of a B'nai B'rith title- a title he created.

But 2007 was going to be different.

Not that it started out that way.

The Yamakazi were fighting for a playoff spot all year in the Greenberg League (not the "B" League, I didn't say the "B" League- there is just a lot of teams- there needed to be two Leagues- the Koufax and the Greenberg Leagues- just different names, no other significance). They pulled out a big win the last game of the season to get up to .500, barely squeaking into the Playoffs as the last seed.

In the first round of the Playoffs... it started.

The Yamakazi, lead by the great manager Jeffrey Herrmann (he didn't even finish in the top 3 in Manager of the Year voting, though- mainly because that is just a regular season award, so the votes were cast before the Playoffs), took down the Goniffs, who were dominate in the regular season, with an unreal winning percentage of over .900.

After the miraculous upset, the Yamakazi were faced with a tough challenge in the Championship game, but quickly got out to a 3-run lead. That type of lead rarely holds in a League where the rule book says that "It would be nice that all teams wear uniforms."

The Yamakazi were somehow holding onto the lead, though. In the last inning, with the Yamakazi up just 3-2, FLBBSL 3-time Gold Glove Award winner Neil Herrmann, son of the great manager Herrmann, charged a slow roller down the 3rd base line. It would have put the tying run on and surely would have caused some major damage to the fragile Yamakazi- a team that never had many leads, especially in the Championship game. But because of 25 years of baseball coaching from manager Herrmann, Neil charged the ball and threw a dart across the diamond to the 1st Baseman to make the out, clearly preserving the 1-run lead.

And the rest, they say, is history. And we know how much Mr. Herrmann loves history.

It may have taken the Yamakazi and Jeffrey Herrmann over 20 years to win a Championship- but all that did was make this victory all the sweeter.

The Yamakazi are 2007 Fair Lawn B'nai B'rith Softball League Champions. And no one can take that away from them.

(No word yet on who brought the Champagne bottles and how the Yamakazi weren't jinxed by this clear act of overconfidence).

Hair at Random

2007-08-26T17:27:00.000-07:00

Sports at Random's COUNTDOWN:

Worst Hair in Sports Reporting:

10. Dan Shaughnessy

Some say he's one of the top sports writers of the last 20 years, Shaughnessy comes in at number 10 only because we give him a break because he's Irish- he can't help that his hair looks like a shower lufa.

9. Matthew Berry

I can't tell if I really like this guy or really hate him. The Talented Mr. Roto is very open with his thoughts on women, masturbation, and, basically, whatever you want to know. He seems approachable, which is good, there's just something about him that is a bit off-putting. Maybe it's his weird, balding hair.

8. Norman Chad

The quintessential nerd hair-cut. Very sad, Norman- you actually seem cool, but not when on-camera.

7. Will Leitch

This isn't 1997.

6. Bryant Gumbel

He's lucky he's got such a good show, because it is so hard to respect someone who looks this much like a tool.

5. Jay Bilas

Your hairline isn't supposed to get closer to your eyebrows. Maybe it's just his hairline receding on the sides and not the middle- or maybe he's Dracula.

4. Tony Kornheiser

The classic comb-over. Come on, Tony. Stop it.

3. Jackie MacMullan

The female mullet. She is a woman covering sports, but still- it's the freakin' female mullet. No excuses.

2. Ken Burns

Great documentaries... awful hair. I'm not sure if he's going for mid-1960's British Invasion... or a mop.

1. Mitch Albom

Mitch- you are ridiculously rich, you are a great sports writer, a best-selling author, Oprah is on your side- you just also happen to have weird, freakishly pointy ears. It's ok, Mitch. We don't care. You shouldn't either. Stop cutting your hair so it covers them. You aren't a shy teenager. You're 49-years-old. This is getting ridiculous.