SERENDIPITY

I've GOT to be determine

2009-08-18T23:43:00.004+10:00

I was just reading my older post. And..OH my Goodness...I am a story teller! ahhaha

This would probably be the year which I have the least post since this site started.And my oh my... I can't believe how much I could tell. All those must have just came out spontaneously from my mind. I will never write anything long if I ever planned it. well.. Not that a short post means I have actually thought about it/...but it doesn't require much thinking. hahaha..** if this make sense**

Anyway...I was looking into one of my regular blog sites. * I have some cooking/baking blogs bookmarked** and I truly admire this malaysian lady who lives in Melbourne, not only for her cooking skills and knowledge, but for her determination and ability to loose almost 40kg and look absolutely fabulous now. Wow...!! Well..I really don't have 40kg to loose but loosing a couple ...like maybe 5kg would really be nice. Hahaha. Unfortunately I seem to fail most of the time. Not that I end up eating a lot, but mostly because I gave up my physical activity. I used to go for my regular jogs in Renmark. But depending on the weather I usually will choose to stay in, as the wind there is really strong and it wasn't pleasant to jog. My stamina on the other hand, isn't very impressive either.

I haven't been exercising very much in the pass 6 months since I moved here, mainly because this isn't a really nice place to go for jogs and... I have been busy working as well. But this sedentary lifestyle is really getting into me. So, I decided to join the gym. It felt like I had to start from the bottom as I could not have much resistance on the machine at all. I looked at the resistant level of the person next to me, and she's at 11 while I'm 3.... She's running at the speed of 11 and i'm...6. SHITZZ!! the next day I went to work with my limbs hurting all over.

Whatever it is... i have decided to cut down on carbs. This hasn't stop me from my passion though. hehee.. I HAVE to blog about this. I made a chocolate stout cake (chocolate cake with chocolate stout) and lasagna for my darling today. Oh...he loved the cake as I made 3 layers of ganache in it. Made the cake really rich and moist. There's 1 cup of stout in the cake. Its quite a fair bit of alcohol in the cake you see. I tried a bit of the cake before filling the ganache and it kinda gave me a headache. My close friends will know... alcohol and me..is a NO NO...Gosh**!!

Anyways.... its time for bed now. My 2 days break is over and i'm starting at 8 tomorrow. NITESSSS

2009-08-07T20:46:00.003+10:00

Oh...!! Finallyy!!! Tonight's dinner was acceptable. The past whole week, dinner was practically just eating-to-survive. So, I decided to look into a few recipes and decided to make a HAKKA MEE look alike noodle. And yes.! it was good.

A number of things I NEED OR.. HAVE TO DO in the next 6 months

1. Get my HMR accreditation
2. Work hard and earn my own pharmacy or.. get into a different specialty in pharmacy.
3. Be daring and take more risk in baking and cooking. Of course, it must be measured risks

Lastly, I am not sure to add this in or not, as I am always gaining and not loosing every year.

4. To loose at least 5 kg!

Alright alright, this is definitely the shortest to-do list ever.

Let's see how many will get a tick by the next 6 months.

6 months in Brissy

2009-08-02T23:13:00.006+10:00

Where should I start? 6 months before, I was anxious, excited, and had all sorts of mixed feelings inside me, wondering how 6 months later would be like? Here I am. I have been through so much in this 6 months. I don't know where to start.

I had learned and experienced so much in my first 3 months of work. It was indeed a VERY difficult time to get pass. BUT I managed to get through and fight my way. It wasn't easy, but i now know how things would turn out if I am not in control. I now know, how this society works. (Well, not entirely yet though.) The society wasn't as easy and as beautiful as I thought it was. The pharmacy I worked in, was NOT the ideal pharmacy for any pharmacist I dare say. It would infact be every pharmacist's nightmare. It is all hardwork, mental and physical torture. Alright, I exaggerated a lil. But, my point is, it was NEVER a good place for ANYONE to work at all. If i go into the details, i would be publishing a BOOK for it. .

Now, I find myself in 4 different pharmacies every week. I have been working like this for the pass 6 weeks. I call this a massive advantage and adventure for me. So much to learn and explore out there. Each pharmacy has its way of management and I walk in to be the pharmacist of the day. I care for the patients that walk in for the day and I walk out leaving notes and messages for tomorrow's pharmacist. I find it a challenge for me everyday as the working environment differs each day. This is working out of my comfort zone!!! A discovery within myself. hmm...I honestly can't find that one word to describe my joy in the work i do now.

Moving up here, I discovered my passion for baking and am doing things i never used to lay eyes on. I just had to do something every week. There will always be somehting in the oven cooking, savory or sweet.Tim would probably be updated on that every week. haha.

Last year , i used to picture myself surrounded by sky scrappers as I am driving home from Barmera to Renmark. It would be pitch dark outside. No cars in front guiding me on the road and none behind me too. Now, as I am on story bridge, over looking at the beautifully lite brissy buildings, I do occasionally think about those times in renmark and how scared I was driving on the roads of riverlands, and not being able to see what's outside my window at night.

My 6 months here had flew by really quickly. I miss my family every second and do still crave to chat with my beloved friends in Adelaide. Life has brought me here and there was just too many ups and downs in such a short time. My loved ones and my beloved friends .. I am just so grateful to have them. They had pulled me out of my black hole and talked me out of misery. It is amazing how lucky I am to have them. Although i know most of them are my own doings and my own decisions. Still, without have them i would probably be still stuck, not knowing what's right.

Love them all from deep within....xxxx

Easy to say not so easy to do

2008-12-23T00:24:00.002+11:00

12 a.m

It is now, bed time. A moment ago, M was asking me if this is it. Am I closing all doors to other options. I don't know. I guess M and everyone else is worried that I have not been through enough Gs to lock up the doors. I kept telling myself...This certainly is not the end yet.. not till the day i have the shiny bit on my finger. But how easy it is to say and so hard to be done and will there even be a chance for me to unlock the 'appeared close doors'. None of this make sense

Memories

2008-11-25T23:13:00.006+11:00

Been almost 5 months since i last updated this site...

The last post was about how work sucks. Clearly, I don't have many complains since. That ONE whole week on my own was not only a great experience for me, I learnt a whole lot and definately made me stronger. I have had my bad days at work since,I still whine and complain about it BUT...i don't keep them at heart. I learn from the bad days and enjoy my good days. And trust me...my good days...are not only plain ordinary good, they are good in a Satisfying way!

So, I have been trying to make myself exercise since the weather got warmer. There are not many beautiful days in the Riverlands. In this region, we get the extreme weather. Being in the desert, we get the extreme cold and hot, the strong wind, and no rain. There will be one or two days which the weather calm and nice. Everyone has their own version of nice and beautiful days. Some say, a sunny day with 20 Degrees and cold wind is beutiful. *that's still a lil cold for me at 20 deg*. My beautiful day is...25-26 degrees.

So, I made myself go for a jog by the river after work today. With day light saving, the sun only sets at about 7.30ish. It happened to be MY BEAUTIFUL DAY. I sat by the river and enjoy the soft breeze as I hear the ducks quacking and people water skiing in the river. I see people walking their pretty dogs. There are also people enjoying this beautiful day like myself, but in the club holding a glass of beer. So, there I was trying to get a pictorial memory of the scene by the river... hoping I will remember it forever.

I remember 2 years ago, I loved going for jogs by River Torrens. At sun down when there's less people around and more black swans, Its very calm and peaceful there. I kept saying that the city is where I belong. That is very true. I cannot live in silence for long. Boredom comes into me too easily. I need excitement and people around me. I longed to move to the city again. But I will never encounter nature's beauty anymore....Well, I might..but not as close as 1 minute walk from my home. Or 20 minutes tram to the beach *Glenelg*.

Everytime, when my patients starts on a new medication, mainly antipyschotics as a result of alzheimers, I get a lil upset*wishing this will never happen to myself* Behavioural disturbances occurs secondary to Alzheimers disease. I wish I will never have Alzheimers. A pictorial memory of everything I see is what I want to keep. Cameras are not reliable.

Work sucks

2008-07-12T00:11:00.003+10:00

Finally~! The week is coming to an end.. 3 more hours tomorrow.. then 1 day break. For the very first time, i look forward to that break. This week was not good at all for me. I was left alone to handle the pharmacy while my 2 bosses is at some tropical island enjoying their Malibu. I certainly did not have a good time at work especially with the customers.

My bosses has been 'pampering' thier customers so much that I am obliged to do the same when they aren't around. Regardless of how ridiculous it is, there is no reason what so ever to refuse customer's request. I refused Mrs. M's request for RX owing with good reasons. Provided suffecient advice to it too. She started yelling on top of her voice and scolding me for not doing her the favour when the bosses aren't around...etc etc and that my reasons for refusal wasn't good enough. I was being condemned in front of all my other customers *(waiting for thier Rx)* that my professional judegment was bad. As a pharmacist in charge, I had no reason to let her walk over me. I don't!! Plus my reasons was 100% valid! I wished i could be rude to her as she was to me but i CAN"T!!!

why can't I??

Bcoz Barmera is a super small town. Be coz my Pharmacy is the only pharmacy there. Becoz she lives in the town and ppl in the town demands what they want and gets it! Becoz my bosses have been living and running their busniess there for 23 years and i can't ruin it in 1 week!

Damn Mrs. M.

After all the yelling for god knows how long, i had to put a smiling face to everyone else who was waiting for thier Rx to be checked by me while I was being scolded. I had to smile and keep a straight mind on it and concentrate as well!

Everything else went wrong after that. there were other things which went wrong and its just too much to talk about. I hated Mrs. M. OLd bitch with no brains.

Its my job-- so i said to myself. It was only the 2nd day in the week. I couldn't wait till the end. The next few days was smooth flowing, and I managed to handle a pension thursday well too. Thank goodness for that!

I guess after tomorrow, everything will be back to normal. no more chaos.

2008-07-06T17:27:00.003+10:00

I find myself readjusting again. Emotionally readjusting again. My Three and half years roomate/housemate moved out last weekend. Thankfully Justin was here distracting me while all the packing was done; took my mind away from the expected-lonely-thoughts. Spent my time in the city on the weekend and got home pass 12am on sunday. Which was really 'great' as i found myself really sleepy and tired the next few days in the following week. I had a so-so week at work and one of the days turned out to be the 'longest' working day ever for me. I can't believe how slow Time crawled that day!

Alright so I've gone through my first week alone in this place. Honestly i hardly have anytime to think. I see this as a chance to concentrate in what i have to do. I rearranged the things in the house...just so to make myself more comfortable. Not that I really have much furniture, just basics. I looked again... ain't much changes at all. haha

I seemed to have problems sleeping well lately. I woke up nearly every night around 4-5 am. On one of those nights i was a lil frightened; was awaken by a sound coming from the kitchen. I didn't leave my bed to investigate or anything. I couldn't get back to bed too. The next day, i got myself a broom stick!

Well, don't laugh...I had to protect myself in someways. With that, a number of my friends, collegues and my neighbour were asking if i would like another housemate. Well...for safety's sake...maybe. Otherwise..i am not sure.

Back to work again tomorrow. It feels like I live there!

2008-05-16T16:31:00.005+10:00

After working for nearly 18 months in the countryside. I do realise some things which are quite different as to the city. Especially with older couples, when 1 dies the other will just srvive the say as how it should be. I see them walking into my pharmacy just to hand the script in one day and say they will come back the next to collect it; when they can actually collect them in 5 minutes. its understandable that ....to be continued. Have rx to do..shitz

2008-05-08T23:06:00.003+10:00

I certainly don't feel my best now. I feel like crap. I once tasted the best fishball meehoon soup(fishball vermicelli) when i felt like this in Australia. That was quite sometime ago. That meehoon was so tasty that moment, but could taste shit when I am feeling well. It was a takeaway vermicelli. This moment when i am at my weakest and barely had the energy to make some instant noodles, I wished someone would make them for me. I have been craving for instant noodles with eggs and some meat balls with choy sum since this afternoon..

I rarely fall sick. Except for that time when i got my flu injection. I never understand why do people get them and still fall sick afterwards. That year when i got the injection, I fell sick 4 times.

Maybe it was a hang over effect. haha ** I just have to put the blame on something**

I have been thinking lately. Choices, options, Priorities...

A glamorous lifestyle but single and lonely, great money and career but single and lonely or..be with the person I cherish and care for most and disregard the two above.

Rambling

2008-04-16T00:10:00.004+10:00

He passed his exams today. All his hard work was worth it in the end. I received his SMS and he told me he passed. I was super happy. I rang to congratulate him. I got a monotonous respond of welcome. Sounded as if I was more excited and happier than he was. I find myself inspired by him sometimes. His hardwork reminded me of mind couple of years ago. Heading to bed at 9pm and waking up at 4am to study. I can never do that anymroe now...its too difficult. That's what the years had done to me..

I should probably work harder to my aim instead of having my mind on somehting else, somewhere else, someone else all the time. THe thing is....I know myself best. I am person who is very fickle minded. I can be very easily affected by the words and people surrounding me. That's mainly because i'm worried of regrets. Always worried that the better decision would be otherwise. I know i shouldn;t feel regretful once I have made my decisions based on good grounds but still I am.

I find my views very inconsistant too. I change my views on things very quickly. Like i say...with a slight influence.. which obviously, i know is not a good habit. I hate it when that happens. I begin to wonder what sort of personality I have.

I have been feeling really down lately. I tried to be passimistic with things but it didin't work. Tried telling him too..didn't work. I guess fixing up things myself and resolving it deep within would be the best option.

Fragility

2008-04-04T21:56:00.004+11:00

I was back in Malaysia 2 months ago and now back to reality. Back to where I should be..working and being who I want to be. My trip back home was great. Time was short and I spent as much time as I could with my family. Managed to queeze a trip to Bangkok. Our family trips had never been this fun. We have never had so much adventure to walk and shop. It was great. There were some friends which i did not manage to catch up with . I wish them well and I hope to see them as soon as I can. I know that we will all enventually loose contact. Life has to go on and everyone has to lead thier own lives. But then again, I wish otherwise.

I made up my mind as to where i want to be for the next few years. Things had been rough at home with the politiccal issues and turning back there would never bring me anywhere but to limit my desires to grow in my career. My trip back didn't just bring me fun and made my mind clearer. I realised how fragile life was. Many relatives aged and 2 years felt like 10 years to them. They aged so much, so frail...i couldn't believe it.

Today, Customer XX passed away. I felt deeply moved by it. XX died suddenly at a gathering with friends apparently. He did have some heart problems but was well controled by medications. This day, four years ago...was also the day grand dad left us. I remembered I was having fun at a camp when he was critical in the hospital. I visited him before i left for camp and never spoke to him after that ever again. He progessively got worse in 1 week and left after that. I still remembered the last few words he spoke to me. Somehow when I heard what he said to me.. it remained in my memory. I knew..someday I would want to remember it.

He too, Left suddenly...without any warning. He wasn't taking as much medications as XX did. But everything happened so quickly like as if all parts of his organs started to shut one by one... I still think of him now and then...

Chinese New year

2008-02-11T01:51:00.000+11:00

So finally I celebrated chinese new year at home after such a longgg time. It was different from how it was celebrated before. So much difference. Chinese new year is the time to meet up people whom we don't meet in usual days. Catch up with people who we see once a year.

Did the same this year. Mainly Caught up with relatives this year.

Numerically, the period of time when i was away, isn't very long at all.. But wat i saw this time, were changes which reflected a length of time like as if it was 10 years. I missed watching the progress and hated to see the drastic change.

I visited grand aunts, grand uncles,uncles, aunties and cousins (who were little before) and other relatives. I was surprised that all of them aged so much during the time I was away. The young ones grew up and i barely can recognize them.

The highlight of CNY used to be going to oldies' houses in my family for a feast and meeting up all other people and eating thier delicious cooking. This time, the old ones appeared to have poor health and is struggling to live everyday, due to that. 2 with a broken back bone, one on a wheel chair, 2 others can't walk well due to severe arthritis. All of them had very poor appetite and needed help to get food. Seriously, the sight of them strugling, upsets me.. I would love to do something, but what can i do? That moment, I vowed to come home for CNY every year.

It made me realise, how fragile life is. I found out some one close had stage 3 colon cancer..and although the surgery kept her safe from the deadly cells temporarily, she couldn't live normally anymore. She claims that all the tests she did, did not warn her of any cancerous cells. She could have gotten early treatment but there were no signs at all. Made me wonder, what if i have been carrying a benign cancerous cell with me all these years which one day, turns malignant.

Life's so shorty and fragile... every moment is so precious...

2008-01-27T19:58:00.000+11:00

Frist week as a pharmacist... I indeed felt pressured the first few days. But now...everything is just fine. *fingers crossed* hopefully it will be smooth flowing all the way.

Right now... i am feeling all excited and nervous at the same time. I am counting every minute and second. Been 2 years . So many things has changed. People back home will say.. there isn't much changes, therefore nothing to worry. But i think otherwise. They are not the one who left and did not see the progress, therefore it isn't significant.

So many things and people for me to catch up with, I worry 1 month isn't enough at all. 1 month will just fly by...and maybe by then i will be posting up on how much i missed home.

**ooohh...cna't wait!!****

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2008-01-01T23:36:00.000+11:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!

Another year gone.. and last year was good year...wouldn't say it was great but it was good. Everything was smooth and went on as planned.

I have 3 big picture folders names 2005,2006 and 2007. 2007 was the smallest folder with the least pictures. Since work started, there were less fun memories. Seldom catch up with frens to do things. Even so, the thought of taking a picture dosen't fit. But I have more pictures with Justin last year. He seemed to be a bigger part of me now and we definately more memories too. Social life seemed much diminished compared to before, i realized. I guess that's life. Sometimes i find myself super quiet and have nothing to say in the crowd or among a few people. Someitmes I even feel difficult to bring up a topic to talk.

Despite that, I got many other things in return. I gained the experience I might not gain further in life. Its definately not easy working in the country. I never noticed the Aussie slang was quite difficult to catch up sometimes. I;m not talking about accent here.. but the slan (words they used to describe things). I can tell you...I will not have a problem in the country if i am in America..but in Aussie... its a challenge. Plus with the miniature community and the sky high requirement, the stress is there.

Anyways, I am gladd that i met a whole bunch of new friends in Renmark which makes life better here. The weekends would be so much longer without them. Great frens don't come by all the time...

12 days to my registration..i'm counting the days...!!

At this moment, I am having this mixed feeling. I am excited and at the same time scared. Some other frens have registered and will be a pharmacist starting tmr.. I will be one on January 13th. So...from then on..I will make my decisions, and do things my wya...*The right way* hahah

So the highlight of last year...
1. Registered on time..
2. More memories with Justin
3. Met a whole bunch of new friends in Renmark

This year...2008..

It shall be a better year. It should be a year for things to happen and go on the way I want it to. I want to do things my way and to do things that makes me happy. Happier at least. I want to work towards something I am aiming. I want to own it..... !!

Life should be as beautiful as sunset

2007-11-21T23:38:00.000+11:00

Today I attended an activity which was meant to refresh my knowledge required for my profession. I would not say I have completely wiped out all my knowledge on this particular topic or that all that I have learnt tonight is totally new to me. But.. instead I realized something which have never occured to me before...

I have said before, tomorrow would be 2 months to my registration or should i say...2 months to the day which I have to be completely responsible with my decisions in practice. And from tonight's activity, I realized how far I am from who i want to be. I see that I am so far away from the other people in the same room. Well...if anyone would understand what i am trying to say. There are somethings that feels new and unfamiliar to me.. The ambitious part of me...is struggling to reveal itself...

It was not the contents of the activity which made me feel this way...I don't know what exactly. There were a million things i would like to bring up, A million things i would like to ask...but yet i let it hide inside me... afraid that my innocence would be some sorta stupidity or sillyness. I know it might not be that way...instead it might be some sorta benefit to others. In fact the older ones might expect someone fresh like me so say somehting...but i did not. IBut..I did want to say something..~!

I have not been reading any materials eversince I made it in my last assesment. I know very well...this shouldn't be the way for me. Instead, i have been indulging into hobbies. Started some creative work..to bring back my creative self, which I have locked away for years... ever since I begun in Science. YEs.. now that i recall..eversince i chose this path, I have put aside creative thoughts and intentions, thinking that it is a waste of time, and it is time consuming.Telling myself over and over again...'don't waste time on these things..i should be reading my pahrmacology instead'! Well..lets see...how long my interest in it will last...

Been such a long and tiring day....

Right now... this is where I want to be.

How True is this?

2007-11-12T00:14:00.000+11:00

Your Hidden Talent

You're super sensitive and easily able to understand situations.

You tend to solve complex problems in a flash, without needing a lot of facts.

Decision making is easy for you. You have killer intuition.

The right path is always clear, and you're a bit of a visionary.

What's Your Hidden Talent?

You Are 54% Independent

Overall, you're a pretty independent woman. You don't follow trends just to fit in.

You've got your own cool thing going on, though you sometimes still care too much about what other's think.

Are You an Independent Woman?

Your True Love's Name Is

Donald H.

What's Your True Love's Name?

You Are A Gold Girl

You're dependable and hard working. You never miss a deadline - and you're never late.

You have a clear sense of right and wrong. You're very detail oriented.

You get frustrated when your friends are sloppy - or when they don't follow through.

You're on top of things, and you wish that everyone else was!

What Color Girl Are You?

pharmacist to be..

2007-11-09T22:26:00.000+11:00

I am about to register as a pharmacist in 2.5 months time~!! Everyday when i give out scripts, I actually watch the dates pass. I tell people what the dates were. I am actually watching the clock tick. I should seriously finish up my 7 HMR reports. I have done 1 and there's 6 more to go. I can't seem to start!

I am starting to handle things better now...then before. More confidence. Encountered 2 difficult situations today and yesterday. I was left to handle it alone. The downside of this is that I am obliged to do it well!

My pharmacy is basically a place where people seek for medical advice when they are lazy or didn't want to go through the hassel to see the doctor. My boss is like an acting doctor in this area. Everyone knows each other and thier stories. And after working in this place for 10 months, most people know me pretty well. People will come to my preceptor for nearly everything they can get without seeing a doctor. And because of the status he established in this community, I am obliged not to let them down too. The 2 incidences I encounterd thought me well. All the running around for nothing but to ensure they are not dissapointed and also maximising health care.

I tried my very best to make sure everyone is happy. I made it.... But i was exhausted by the end of the day. I intended to go to the gym for 1 hr to work it all out...but i left after 15 mins.

To make things worse... FATTY was being such a pain! I really hate her. I know it sounds harsh...but she really have some serious mental issues. I don't see the possiblity of her registering at all. If she really do... anyone can be a blardy pharmacist!!!

The clock is ticking every second... my time to be responsible of everything I do is coming close. I am telling myself I can do this... I can

Still Contributing at 82 years

2007-10-12T23:30:00.000+11:00

Mahatir's bakery....

I just found out that this man owned THE LOAF...the new bistro opened at Pavillion. Nothing Special, some will say... but I just think this man is at least still doing something ... unlike Abdulla...argh.. I have no idea what he did so far for the country.

Check out the variety of Sweets and bun in the store. I am not in the country at the moment..and I really yearn to go back... many changed I heard..

The new shopping malls, new images of places. I can't wait.

Check it out... www.theloaf.net

I am calling in sick...

2007-10-12T00:44:00.001+11:00

should probably start my day again.

Wished i never got off bed this morning, or at least go back to bed if i regret waking up.

Oh.. want to be in my espresso sanctuary

start again please tomorrow!!

Come again...

2007-10-10T09:22:00.000+11:00

Wednesday Morning...

Opened my eyes...'Oh no, where's the sun ray? Don't tell me I am late'
(I thought to myself. The sun shines through the blinds in my room every morning, telling me wake up)

Looked into the time on my handphone.. '7.12 am. Oh.. it is almost time to wake up..'

Looked outside my window, there was this HUGE cloud over Renmark. It wasn't cold at all..

Changed into shorts and t-shirt

Steped outside my house 'Hmm.. I hope I won't freeze later'

I walked towards the river...

Saw a half eaten apple on the bench...'EEWW'

Soft wind... Cloudy

I jogged for 15 minutes along the river....

Didn't want to leave....

If only i can sit on the river bank...and enjoy the breeze all day.

When will a day like this come again....

Came home...

Blogged while waiting for breakfast...

Updates

2007-09-19T00:16:00.000+10:00

It is almost impossible to believe how fast time flies. Its spring already and nearly the end of September. Soon it will be Xmas and then its time to set New year's resolutions again. And that also means, I will be a registered pharmacist in 3 months time.

I still miss msia alot. Sometimes when I am dispensing, i wonder off...somewhere... thinking what would i be doing at that time of the day if i was in msia. And in between, I will just have this crazy idea about getting a good deal; say 99 dollars air ticket to MSIA and spend my weekend there. I will just google imediately *cheap flights to Malaysia* ...while dispensing....

Mid Autumn festival is next tuesday. Seems like I am the only one who wants to do something but can't really do much while most people don't remmeber much about this festival. I am personally a fan of mooncake and I would spend heaps on it. It is a yearly thing which i look foward to. When i was young, we used to have a lil party in the garden under the moonlight. Ther will be lantterns light up around my house and neighbours will pop by to chat. Everyone will bring food over and try all sorts of mooncake. And my favourite....white lotus and red bean mooncake. As for the kids, they will be fascinated by the candles and start lighting the multi coloured candles everywhere....! oh...how i miss those times...hehe

Yes, I passed my APCAT and am now preparing for the ORAL exam which is apporximately 1 month from now. I have absolutely no idea how to prepare for this exam except to attempt more OTC cases in the pharmacy and read more on the current issues and articles in the Pharmacy magazines. Right after APCAT, I treated myselft a trip to Melbourne and was away from the country for about 10 days. It was an amazing trip; not to mention all the shopping, eating and the city life.... a piece of memory i will alwasy remember.

Well, knowing how i am, despite the hectic and bz life in the city, i dread very much to live in the country. It is the experience in the country that I seek and i definately got it here. The experience is great. But how long should i be here for experience? A few more months to the end of the year, It is probably time to make plans. I might have let go a chance which might bring good future, but i know very well that I am not good at taking risks and will not make a decision and act on it when i am not 100% sure. I don't know what i want at the moment and i am still looking and searching for the right path. Rushing into things just because there is chance for somehting good isn't the answer to what i want. Despite this, there is still a lil hope in me, that everyhting will still work out and its a matter of time. Whether its soon or later. if you'll wait...

12 days to ...XMas? haha DREAM ON!

2007-08-09T00:09:00.000+10:00

12 days to APCAT. Yes though we have graduated from the 4 years course as a drugist, we are technically not a drugist yet before going through 1 year trainning in the real world and to take this exam. Once this is over, I can probably relax for a while before VIVA.

This morning when i was driving to work, as I turn into the parking lot behind my pharmacy, I had this 2 seconds thought suddenly. 'OMG...NO! I don't want to see the patient's again!' WAKE UP!! BACK TO REALITY!! I told myself..WEll, despite being quite stressful meeting the high expectations of people and the bunch of experienced staffs and being frustrated at customers, it is the profession I chosed...There are new discoveries at work everyday. I must say, it feels good being recognised by people. Feels good that people are getting more confident with me now.

Couple of days ago, I was reading the newspaper and I saw this picture of Victoria Square which took me a few seconds to recognize. The tram was done!! Then I realized how long I had not been back to Adelaide. Well, Not very long though...had only been one and half months. But WHY does it Feels damn long...? I calculated the number of times I had been back...5! 5 times in 8 months, no wonder it felt heaps long! Gosh, I really miss that place... I miss my friends too. It made me think, why on earth did I not go back when I had so many long weekends which I spent alone here~! staring at the laptop all alone! I had no idea... I guess back then I had many issues to deal with and was still adjusting to the changes. *Just an excuse*maybe..

I missed out alot with my friends....missed out on the good times.. really regreted not going back more often. I was told that some sacrifices had to be made in order to get what i want. I agree with that, except that I may not know how to make the right sacrifices to get the what i want. I hope it is not too late yet....

Been 1 year since I met that special someone. There were many ups and downs in this one year, but I guess there will be no ups if there is no downs. Though we had to be apart for sometime, but time flies..I believe that very soon we;ll be togather again...

2007-07-19T01:39:00.000+10:00

I should really go to bed. I have a presentation to do on WARTS tomorrow morning and had to leave house by 8am~! which means i need to be awake by 7.30 at least!

I am glad... that now, things are quite different from before. THere are some outtings which will just take my mind off some things which will keep me wondering what have i done wrong or what have i done that wasn't enough... i am glad.

Keeps me away from always comparing and evaluating myself. Always asking if i have done my best or if I could have done better in some ways..

Feel like going away to...some place far far away. Take a deep deep breath and come back...start over. A good morning jog at 3 degrees might be a little cold but, feels real good.

Feel like going to the beach.... can't wait for spring... Bring the sun please... and the beutiful sunset....

OH.... James Morrison- Pieces don't fit anymore
NICE SONG BY THE WAY...
**p/s: SONG title has nothing to do with the above ** hehe

2007-07-18T01:33:00.001+10:00

This show, HEART of GREED... one of the latest TVB series. It will soon be very famous and be remembered my most people like one of the old shows ' I HAd A Date With Spring'. This is just my favourite song for the show. This 40 episode show is about family issues and how other people plot of steal their money and break apart the family. Everyone should watch!! hehe

Extended time

2007-07-11T23:57:00.000+10:00

SIt is a routine everyday. There is nothing I do that is outta the ordinary. Except when I bake. Bake, sounds pathetic..though i like it and it is the best way to pass time. I know i have to make my own fun, and my own life. No point keeping the thought that this is temporary. No one knows if it will be temporary or not. It may not be...

Exams is in 6 weeks time. Really want to study everyday but it is so difficult to get things into my mind. I am very sleepy...physically tired too... I realized that sometimes I think about what to cook for dinner as I am driving home... and will still be thinking of what to cook for dinner when i get home and have a shower... In the end, instant noodle it is... because it is too late to cook already. I guess it can be another excuse to diet...! *miserable*!

I'm off to bed now... Dozing off as I am typing this...