Into the NOW.

HIDDEN GEMS

2006-12-08T08:11:00.000-08:00

Hidden Gems
Experiences We Don't Understand

Sometimes we have an experience that we don't understand, but if we look deeply, or wait long enough, a reason for that experience will usually reveal itself. All the events in our lives lead to other events, and all that we have manifested in this present moment is the result of past events and experiences. We cannot easily tease apart the many threads that have been woven together to create our current reality. Experiences that don't make sense, as well as any that we regret, are just as responsible for the good things in our lives as the experiences we do understand or label as "good." This is especially important to remember at times when we feel directionless or unsure of what to do. It is often at times like these that we take a job or move to a place without really knowing if it's the right thing to do. We may ultimately end up leaving the job or the place, but often during that time we will have met someone who becomes an important friend, or we may have an experience that changes us in a profound way. When all the pieces of our life don't quite make sense, we can remember that there may be some hidden gem of a reason that we are where we are having the experiences we are having. It's fun to look back on past experiences with an eye to uncovering those gems-the dreadful temporary job in a bland office building that introduced you to the love of your life; the roommate you couldn't tolerate who gave you a book that changed your life; the time spent living in a city you didn't like that led you into a deeper relationship with yourself. Remembering these past experiences can restore our faith in the present. Life is full of buried treasures. Chances are, you're sitting on some right now.

--STOLEN FROM RANDOM EMAIL..

Goodbye Stormy

2006-12-02T08:09:00.000-08:00

kinda a cheesy story.. But I like it anyway.
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

Stormy You have been a loyal fiesty companion of mine for over 13 years. I will never forget you. In The mornings you were alway the first one to tell me goodmorning. AS I drank my coffee and mumbled about the day ahead you always looked up at me from my feet with a smile and a purr...I am all alone now. But Part of you will always remain with me. GOODBYE MY loving tiger.

ps. I know you never thought you were a domestic cat, I am sure if you have been reborn -----the universe made you a fierce tiger. Again. Goodbye I love you.

I MISS MY TRUCK..

2006-11-27T10:16:00.000-08:00

MY FAITHFUL TRUCK...goodbye TACOMA...

Everything Reminds Me of Her

I never really had a problem
Because of leaving,
But everything reminds me of her
This evening.
So if I seem a little out of it, sorry,
But why should I lie?
Everything reminds me of her.

The spin of the earth impaled a silhouette of the sun on a steeple,
And I gotta hear the same sermon all the time now from you people.
Why are you staring into outer space crying
Just because you came across it and lost it?
Everything reminds me of her.
Everything reminds me of her.
Everything reminds me of her.

New Car, NIce sunset and a bunch of crazy bolts for my friends swingset

2006-10-23T16:30:00.000-07:00

I am back--- crazy pics I took with my mac

2006-08-29T21:46:00.000-07:00

Quotes from the Movie "the Notebook"

2006-08-04T05:51:00.000-07:00

"I am no one special, just a common man with common thoughts. I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me, and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect, I've succeeded as gloriously as anyone who ever lived. I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and for me, that has always been enough."

"The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that's what you've given me. That's what I'd hoped to give you forever."

Jeff

Ps. A great Movie The notebook is... Open up a bottle of red wine, sit and rediscover the tears that have not fallen in a while.

Tahoe, the beach and my crazy new sheets

2006-08-01T05:34:00.000-07:00

Been a while since I have posted....I am still alive. My cat attacked my new sheets for about an hour before calming down-- I think the pokadots tripped her out.. it was really funny. Anyway gotza ta git to wirk
Jeff

Cannon Ball

2006-07-10T11:37:00.000-07:00

4th of July, Placerville and yummy Downtown Brown on tap.

2006-07-06T17:10:00.000-07:00

The Sunflower pix is on the levee by my new house.The Levee seems like it goes on foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Spent the 4th in Placerville. Found that every bar has Downtown Brown on tap..The bar I am drinking at is in an old mine. Very dark and cool even on a hot day.

What a great city. The blue image is on a barrel, they had barrel art everywhere on display..I liked the blue barrel with faces best.

All I have to do today is smile..:):)

2006-06-18T06:58:00.000-07:00

My move is over... argh...I am alive...I sold my house and moved to the West sideeeeeeeeeeeee....
Anyway.. Life has been crazy..My nephews and neices are staying with me, my cat hates me (she got into a major fight last night with a few other cats, her face was so puffy and blood was in her mouth.. At first I thought she was going to die.. I was freaking out at 3am, ...I am surprised she let me pick her up without clawing me. I grabbed her--- yelled and scared the bad meanie cats away and protected my queen. I do not think she wanted to fight-- but was standing her ground. I saw no marks on her except the blood in the mouth, then I started thinking she was posioned...I was freaking........I am keeping her inside until I feel better about this new neighborhood...)

Anyway, I havent slept much in over a week. Feel like I am in a hotel rather than at home..Feels to foreign right now..

The house I sold I had professionaly cleaned for the new owners.. It looks so nice. I am getting the carpets cleaned this morning (yes on fathers day)...
Monday hand over the keys. A chapter in my life has closed.. Scary but its only life..

River Ride Sunday, Mike, Aaron and Jeff

2006-05-29T06:47:00.000-07:00

I had a great time at the river with Migs and Aaron.. Saw a few wild turkeys, Swans, hawks and a jack rabbit.. No rattlesnakes this time...It wasnt hot enough for them to come out and lay on the trails. I always love my river rides. I have no cares in the world out there. We rode about 26 miles.. A slower pace than normal.

My Garden's Rockn And Rollin, Stormy hide n seek and school is over--(for now) Good Bye Huber.

2006-05-25T05:49:00.000-07:00

The Garden is rockin, too bad I won't be here to enjoy it.
Can you find Stormy?
Good bye Huber..

--Jeff out

I am alive- shadowman series

2006-05-23T18:01:00.000-07:00

Life, what does it have in store for me? Where is my journey going to lead me?
All I know is I will walk towards it fearlessly ..
jdawg 5/23/06

Stormy

2006-05-16T20:27:00.000-07:00

My new improved Stormy... She and I have have gone through so many major changes lately... Cosmetic and mental....She has lost 2.5 pounds.. I put her on a tuna diet.. She is fiesty as ever. She has also recently learned spanish. ( I am not kidding, no really I am not kidding) And she is very healthy. I want her to live her last few years with the food of her choice and I will continue to treat her like the queen she is... I think she was royalty in a previous life.. Actually in this life she is treated like royalty...I am out.... My second bottle of red wine just got opened and sammy hagar "I will fall in love again" is blarring out of my computer...

Jeff

I was tagged by Twisted Reasons (michele)

2006-05-09T14:47:00.000-07:00

Do's and Don't's of me...

I do love HBO
I do not like commercial television

I do love Ice cream
I don't like the fat it puts on me.

I do love my cat
I don't like cleaning her kitty litter

I do love coffee in the early am
I don't like my caffeine headaches

I do like being in love
I don't like when its not Reciprocated

I do love the first kiss
I don't like the goodbye kiss

I do love music
I don't like paying an arm and leg for the concerts

I do love my big heart
I don't like the way people take advantage and manilpulate it

I do love myself
I don't like when I hate myself

I do love this world and the random acts of kindness I see
I don't like the way people are cruel at times

I do love the river and riding my bike
I don't like the people that break glass on the trails causing flats and litter

I do like how Iam in the best shape of my life
I do not like how I cant eat what i want

I do like going to school and learning
I do not like paying 79 dollars for a book that falls apart before the class is even over.

I tag: Tracie, Heidi, Vero and Rob

2006-05-07T19:20:00.000-07:00

A great song.

2006-05-04T05:44:00.000-07:00

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now. Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine. Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday. Do one thing every day that scares you. Sing. Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours. Floss. Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself. Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements. Stretch. Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't. Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone. Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's. Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own. Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room. Read the directions, even if you don't follow them. Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly. Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young. Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel. Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders. Respect your elders. Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out. Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85. Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth. But trust me on the sunscreen.

Hello, Goodbye and Goodluck. (i am alive)

2006-05-04T05:31:00.000-07:00

Too my little nephew. Like me, but never wind up like me.
--Uncle jeffrey 5/04/06

"Do not be critics, you people, I beg you. I was a critic and I wish I could take it all back because it came from a smelly and ignorant place in me and spoke with a voice that was all rage and envy. Do not dismiss a book until you have written one, and do not dismiss a movie until you have made one, and do not dismiss a person until you have met them. It is a f***load of work to be open-minded and generous and understanding and forgiving and accepting, but, Christ, that is what matters. What matters is saying yes." -Dave Eggers,

4:32am studying

2006-04-19T04:44:00.000-07:00

I am trying to study for my Midterm.. Needed a break. Its 4:34am... gotz my coffee, gotz my study sheet. Gotz Everything I need for success. So... I am gonna press on. I havent been in the bloggin mood lately. Been busy. So hello , goodbye and good luck.
-ME
ps. Cut work yesterday, it was such a beautiful day. I hung out at Hoppy's brewery studying outside under the hot sun.. Summer is almost here, life is looking up kidz. Life is looking up.

Great line great movie

2006-04-12T12:07:00.000-07:00

If you want to know all the anwsers in life. In regards to love, work and family/friends. Buy the movie SAY ANYTHING... it is like the book of anwsers. It will guide you in the right direction.. Like LLoyd says.. I want to be hurt.. Live life..

Rock on Space monkeys!!

Lloyd Dobler: Why can't you be in a good mood? How hard is it to decide to be in a good mood and be in a good mood once in a while? You used to be fun. You used to be warped and twisted and hilarious... and I mean that in the best way - I mean it as a compliment! "
Constance: I was hilarious once, wasn't I?

" Too Funny" Stormy-- I am sorry I didnt know!

2006-04-09T06:42:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: No kitties were hurt or killed in the making of this blog
ps. Stolen from The Balls @ http://www.stormlarge.com

Friday nite "The Balls" @ Blue lamp

2006-04-09T06:20:00.000-07:00

This band was really awesome, She is an amazing singer. I have never seen/heard a woman with this much talent live. She can sing any kind of tune, hit any note. She was working the crowd. Best 5 bucks I ever spent for a show. here is the link
http://www.stormlarge.com

ps.she sings a great love song called I want you to die (it is a classic).. check it out under her mp3s on her web site. The next time she is in town, Check them out!!

Hardest part of life

2006-04-07T05:41:00.000-07:00

"More tears are shed over anwsered prayers than unanwsered ones."- Truman Capote

Hardest part about life
You look yourself in the mirror and realize you weren't enough.
You weren't smart enough to get that job.
You didn't give someone you loved what they needed-- so they left.
You couldnt resist that chocolate, so you got fat.
You didn't turn left instead of right so you crashed your car.
You cared too much for someone so they ran.
You didnt care enough so they ran.
You couldn't communicate your feelings
You give too much away
Too tall
Too Short
Day late
Dollar short
Insensitive
Too sensitive
Mistakes
Insecurities
Lack of Intelligence
Everyone has something inside them that someone else doesn't
this is what makes the earth rotate
The gravity ground us
makes the sky blue
the ocean wave
the birds chirp
The dandelions grow
Everyone can only be who they are
The hardest part about life
by Jeff..

HATE ME!! This song tears me to pieces when I hear it.

2006-04-06T05:52:00.000-07:00

"Hate Me"

I have to block out thoughts of you so I don’t lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I’m alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me?
It is I that wanted space

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you

I’m sober now for 3 whole months it’s one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won’t touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I’ll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn’t do for you

Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you

And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes crying and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling “make it go away!”
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered “How can you do this to me?”

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn’t do for you

Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you

Random pixs and major Psycho babble

2006-04-05T05:35:00.000-07:00

I am forcing myself to write down something. lets seeeeeee. Coffee hmmm good. Tired, school is wearing me out-- my brain is fried. Sick days--me like them... What else can I come up with in my hazey/sleepy coffee induced psychobable..Library---Hoppy's Brewery it's the same thing in my world. I think all library's should have micro brews on tap..What a wonderful world that would be.
I hope everyone is doing just swell. May the gods smile down upon you all and help you find the lost road map to your dreams. May the stardust that was once you-- help mold you into all that you were meant to become, all that you are and instruct you to let go of dreams that were never meant to be. Life is all about letting go and finding new trouble to get into. What's the point of a cookie jar if you can't get caught with your hand in it???

Rock on space monkeys.
Jeff out.