tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16565481.post-1135185165826510062005-12-21T09:12:00.000-08:002005-12-21T09:12:46.293-08:00I am so angry and disappointed. My daughter’s birth mother calls every Christmas and birthday and sends gifts. I guess I am usually the one to contact her about Christmas and let her know what my dd wants. This year I decided to leave it alone and see what happens. Mainly because last birthday she tried to call 3 times but never actually called. We set up time for her to call and she didn’t call. My dd was upset and hurt by this (I only told her about one appointment to call). Finally, I told her birth mother not to call as it was too far past the birthday.<br/><br/>So, the other day I decided I needed to prepare my dd for the fact that she might not call this Christmas. Well, that went over like a lead balloon……not too surprising. But finally my dd decided to send an email to her birth mother to tell her she forgave her for not calling and knew she was busy (for the birthday). She told her how much she missed her and loved her.<br/><br/>No response! Nothing! I am afraid that her birth mother is angry with me over the birthday issue, but I NEVER imagined she would take it out on my daughter. She does often do things at the last minute (gifts) but I am shocked that we haven’t heard from her at all.<br/><br/>Here’s my two cents: Most birth mothers are active in the baby’s life for a while…usually 2-3 years, rarely do they hang in there for 10 years. My dd’s birth mother is very unusual. She often gets upset with me over things I would never expect her to be upset about (unpredictable behavior). It’s probably time for my dd’s birth mother to fade away, but it’s been ten years and it’s going to be very painful for my daughter.<br/><br/>It makes me so sad to see her upset over her birth mother, but I am tired of keeping that relationship going. <br/><br/>Seeing a child, who is as sensitive as my daughter, so deeply hurt, as this could hurt her, breaks my heart. I hope things don’t get as bad for her as I can imagine. I hope she is old enough to understand. I also hope that I can be strong enough to help her through it without having to be disrespectful to her birth mother. <br/><br/>If you have a minute, say a prayer for my daughter to get through this without too much deep, deep hurt.<br/><br/>KarenKaren Petznoreply@blogger.com