Golden Tornado

Mmm, Cupcakes are Tasty!

2006-11-16T17:07:00.000-08:00

So the snacky beginning to GT's basketball schedule is now over, with the Yellow Jackets having consumed it without so much as a burp. What do four blowouts against lesser opposition have to show us?

Javaris Crittenton is everything we needed, and then possibly some more on top of that. He's long, smooth and looks completely in control. Unlike the two other hyped freshman PG's in this class (Sherron Collins at KU and Tywon Lawson at UNC) he looks steady and ready for the big time. This was my biggest fear, this very talented team could be destroyed by poor play from Crittenton and a slew of freshman errors - but he's been extremely good right out the door. 100+ in the past two games isn't a mistake when your point guard has 19 assists combined.

Lewis Clinch is more muscular, has improved his handle and is making "the leap" into a big time ACC scorer. He has the soul of an assassin and he's super smooth with what is turning into a lethal mid range game to go with his solid outside shooting. Anthony Morrow led the team in scoring and 3pt shooting last year, and yet Clinch is playing so well he's going to turn Morrow into a weapon off the bench. Plus, #0 as shooting guard is just sweet. Clinch has hit 21-29 shots in 3 games, scoring 50 total points - that's one impressive line.

Thad Young is really good. We already knew this, but he hasn't dissapointed in the least. His passing and defensive are possibly more impressive than his offensive skills - prodigious as they are. More about Thad in a couple of points.

Overall defense has been spectacular because of the ridiculous length of this team. Any time Crit, Thad and Faye are on the court at the same time there's more arms on the court than I've ever seen. Those three in particular are just everywhere and getting fingers on every pass. We extend the floor like the '04 team, forcing opponents to set up even farther away from the basket and creating easy scoring opportunities over turnovers. This is a fun, fun group to watch.

Interior defense is still a bit spotty, and I'm not sure it's going to get better. When your two best shotblockers appear to be wings (Faye and Thad) and your two "post" players are a bit undersized in one case and slow to move their feet in the other, you're going to have a soft spot there if people can beat the pressure on the wings and backcourt. This might just be an area that Hewitt has to scheme around to overcome, though I'm scared what Hansbrough might do to us.

This isn't the Hive, we have a #6 here - and it's Faye. He's been very impressive on the defensive end, and while he's a bit raw on the offensive end he's clearly got a large skillset and will only improve. Nice jumper, decent handles, good court awareness and a willingness to pass the basketball. It's on the other end where he's spectacular though, the guy is just everywhere and his hands seem to be on every ball. He goes from pressuring the PG on one possession to guarding the center the next under the hoop. He's going to play a ton because Hewitt loves defense and he's the best defender on the team.

The best lineup so far is Crittenton, Clinch, Thad, Faye and Dickey and it's not even close. So athletic, so long and so able to pressure on the perimeter. As long as Dickey exerts effort on the defensive end of the court, he's clearly our best post presense and I love Jeremis Smith but he's more limited in what he can do defensively than Faye. Smith seems to work better with the second unit, and will still be one of the team leaders in minutes - but the group I listed is so fast and fluid and will give people fits all season long.

This is the most talented Tech team I've ever seen 1 through 9, and while there will be growing pains (maybe as soon as Maui) there is enormous potential for the end of the season. The fact that Anthony Morrow isn't more prominently featured in this review says something ... the guy is still a heck of a player but he's no longer the "go to star" of this team, heck he's probably not even a starter even when healthy. That's ridiculous. Hewitt is slowly building a monster program in Atlanta.

Basketball ... Already?!?!

2006-10-17T19:36:00.000-07:00

While football season is going full speed over at the AOL Fanhouse, we can't forget that basketball practice has started around the country, and Tech's young team is gearing up for a run through the ACC in the very near future.

There's been a lot written about the pair of McDonald's All-American freshman that Paul Hewitt brought in this past off-season, but lets not forget about the guys who are already on the roster. Ra'Sean Dickey is still the man in the middle (and one of DraftExpress.com's 15 NBA draft prospects to watch in the ACC), Jeremis Smith is still the enforcer and fiery heart of the team and Anthony Morrow and Lewis Clinch are 25 point games waiting to happen. Throw in other proven performers like Mario West and you have a lot of talent on the roster with experience already - this isn't going to just be the Thad and Critty show like some in the media have been making it sound.

To get you at least a tiny bit excited about basketball (I know it's hard with the football team ranked #13 and heading to Death Valley this weekend), here's a couple of videos to remind of just how much fun this season is going to be in the Thriller Dome.

Jeremis Smith dunks all over Nelson of Duke as Dickie V goes nuts

Jeremis with another vicious dunk against BC

Montage of 4 dunks (including electric ones from Mario and Jeremis) against NC State

Oh yeah, that Thad guy is going to be really good too

The Ugly Side of Winning

2006-10-01T19:55:00.000-07:00

Dan wrote a great piece about GT fans earlier this month, and while it explains a lot - I'm not sure it even went far enough, as evidenced by the internet fan behavior of the past 24 hours. Since the moment GT went up 38-13 against VT and the game was basically over, there's been a sea change in the attitude of GT fans and it's very disturbing.

First, we've got "everybody back on board" effect. Sorry, you can't dedicate your existence to bad mouthing the coach, the program, the players, the quarterback, the OC, the stadium and the groundskeeper and then suddenly jump two feet on board the bandwagon when it's those same folks driving it. If you had a poll on your message board in the last two weeks seriously asking if the AD should fire the head coach in the middle of the season, you're off the bandwagon and not welcome back on. If you said you no longer consider yourself a GT fan, that's it - you're off. If you said you were cheering for ND in the opener because you openly hate our coach and want him gone, you're off. If you've mocked everyone who's said "you know, this offense isn't going to be half bad this year", don't come here now and start talking about ACC Championships with that very same offense you wasted so much time ripping.

Yes, I know fans are "fanatical" and do stupid stuff like this all the time, but come on. We claim to be a great educational institution, but I'd swear reading GT message boards and the AJC.com comment sections for the past several years that there's plenty of evidence that even absolute morons are capable of getting a GT degree. The constant backbiting and whining has given the entire program a sour note, and if you've dedicated your past several years to undermining anything good that GT accomplishes, you can keep right on doing that. Don't suddenly change your attitude because of one win by the EXACT SAME PEOPLE YOU HAVE SPENT 4 YEARS SPEWING VEMON AT. Georgia Tech won in Blacksburg because of Reggie Ball, Chan Gailey and Patrick Nix. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it.

It's one thing to raise legitimate complaints about performance and issues with the program. But it's a whole different ball game to openly root against "your" team, which a number of GT "fans" have done. I've been critical of individual items during Gailey's and Ball's tenure on this blog (after the Utah game, for example), but I've never gone even remotely close to the level of bile displayed by a disgracefully large portion of our fanbase. I have a pretty happy overall outlook about the program (basketball, baseball or football) because I want to enjoy cheering for sports, not spending my weekends making myself and everyone around me miserable. I can't imagine what it's like for guys like Ball, who I secretly hope takes in the applause on senior night after a great final year and just throws the bird to half the stands. If he doesn't, he's a bigger man than me. Heck, during Gailey's post game interview I'm surprised he didn't just say "this was for all the **** that kept calling for me to be fired".

Secondly, and maybe more disturbing - the trash talking element of GT fans is suddenly out in full force. Check out the Maryland board, there's a bunch of people "informing" UMD of just how badly they will be beaten this weekend in Atlanta. Of course, these guys are also the same folks claiming a couple of weeks ago that Chan should be fired because he "always loses to one inferior team" - so I'm not sure how that logic works in the first place (again with that morons graduating from Tech thing). We as Tech fans talk all the time about what unsportsmanlike boors Georgia fans are, but give us one tiny taste of success and it's the same crap. Seriously, stop freaking shaming the majority of us who have three brain cells to rub together and realize what jackasses you are making us look like. The VT win was the biggest of Chan's career, to be sure - AU x2 and UM were nice, but never put us in the ACC drivers seat or in contention for a BCS bowl - but it doesn't suddenly make this football team some sort of invincible force. This isn't mid-90's Nebraska here, and we're supposedly great fans who don't act like fools, so just keep your yapper shut for a few more weeks, ok? I love Tech sports, I'm ambivalent about Tech fans. The "little brother" phenomenom is just so tightly woven into the fabric of the average Yellow Jacket fan I'm afraid it's nearly impossible to remove, and it's an ugly, ugly sight when it gets into the light of day.

/rant off

(oh yeah - actual coverage and commentary on GT is over on AOL now, if you care to read it)

Avast Ye Lanlubbers!

2006-09-19T07:23:00.000-07:00

It's national "Talk Like a Pirate Day" again today, and in honor we have "Pee Dee" the ECU Mascot as the image of the day. Nothing says "Argggg, walk the plank you scumsucking bilge rat" quite like a pirate dressed in purple!

So crawl out of your bungholes you filthy maggots and spread some pirate cheer (or jeer) to your office today. And remember, real pirates don't care what they wear - because a big cutlass is a language of it's own.

"A source of harm or ruin"

2006-09-18T17:24:00.000-07:00

That's the American Heritage Dictionary definition for "nemsis" though they might as well have put it under "University of Virginia Cavaliers". For whatever reason, those blue and orange uniforms have been kryptonite to the white and gold over the past several years. Reggie Ball and Calvin Johnson haven't beaten them - as a matter of fact, GT has lost 3 straight and in mostly dominating fashion.

This year would appear to be different, as Virginia is in very poor shape right now and GT is playing well. Throw in what appears to be a young QB making his very first start on the road under the lights and you can hear Tenuta's maniacal laugh all the way here in New York. That being said, stranger things have happened in this series and there's nothing about Virginia week that makes me comfortable.

On the positive note, Tech's two best recent seasons have been propelled by wins over UVa (1990, 1998) - so maybe that's an omen for a season where Tech is suddenly looking like a solid threat to make a trip to Jacksonville. Ian Cohen of Sexy Results! fame and I will be engaging in some question and answer banter over on AOL this week leading up to the game - check it out and drop your comments in. This is a huge chance for GT to make a statement on national TV as a serious contender and get the league season off to a solid start.

Changes Coming

2006-09-15T23:00:00.000-07:00

As you might have noticed, I haven't covered the football season quite as actively on this blog as I did last year - and there's a couple of reasons for that. First off, moving and changing jobs (blah, blah, blah, nobody cares). Secondly, and more suprising - I have been invited to write for the new AOL Fanhouse, which is a collection of sportsbloggers which AOL has assembled to keep a touch on the pulse of the fans. I guess they've seen the explosion of the "blogosphere" in the past couple of years and with the popularity of Brian's BlogPoll and other sites - they wanted to get a piece of it.

So, while I will be writing a fair amount there (game previews and recaps each weekend, other items of note and editorial type pieces) - I will not completely abandon this blog. Expect random silly stuff like mascot reviews, YouTube videos, long rants about crappy bowl games and other content not neccessarily applicable for the AOL site to be here. The AOL site will be more regular and will feature more frequent updates than this site has in the past - getting paid to do it makes it a bit more like a "job" than this has ever been.

To read me on AOL (including my expectations for the upcoming Troy game) use [this link]. Thanks to everyone that's read my blog over the past year+, I started doing this just to keep out of my wife's hair and never had a clue that anyone beyond my immediate family would give any care about what I had to say.

Blog Poll Ballot - Week 3

2006-09-13T05:13:00.000-07:00

Rank	Team	Delta
1	Ohio State	25
2	Notre Dame	24
3	Southern Cal	23
4	Auburn	22
5	Louisiana State	21
6	Florida	20
7	Georgia	19
8	Louisville	18
9	Michigan	17
10	Texas	16
11	Oregon	15
12	Tennessee	14
13	Florida State	13
14	West Virginia	12
15	Iowa	11
16	Oklahoma	10
17	Nebraska	9
18	Boston College	8
19	TCU	7
20	Georgia Tech	6
21	Arizona State	5
22	Rutgers	4
23	Boise State	3
24	Texas Tech	2
25	Missouri	1

Dropped Out:

How GT Lost

2006-09-05T09:15:00.000-07:00

It's a funny thing, the internet. There's a ton of commentary on Reggie Ball's performance, our lack of imaginative playcalling, not going to Calvin down the field enough, etc. Chan is an absolute idiot, Jon Tenuta is God and is currently standing on a lake somewhere preaching to his disciples of the almighty zone blitz - all of the above.

In reality, our offense did pretty well ... certainly well enough to win. Except in one key area, and the complete failure in this department lost the game. Short yardage situations continue to plague this team, and it's partly offensive line play, partly poor QB decision making, partly bizarre playcalling and partly just flat out poor play by the backs.

So lets look at how each drive ended (which is easy to do, we only had 9 drives all game) and something jumps off the page ... we just blew chance after chance to extend drives on short yardage plays and fell flat on our face. GT only had a single 3 and out the entire game, and yet came away with only 10 points. That's hard to do.

Drive #1 -

GT gets a first down by converting a 3rd and 1 with a Reggie run. This is a nice start to the opening drive, and a good sign for the rest of the night. Or not, as GT gets a 2nd and 1 and procedes to turn that into a 3rd and 4, which is an incomplete pass and GT punts. This goes down as a failed easy opportunity to keep a drive alive with a 1 yard gain.

Drive #2 -

GT gets a pair of first downs and then an incomplete pass and a short run lead to 3rd and 7. Another incomplete and a punt. 3rd and 7 is a tough situation to be in, but ND's secondary played well and this wasn't a "gimme" situation like the first drive.

Drive #3 -

Calvin is superhuman, GT scores a TD. Hidden in all of that though is a nice job on 2nd and 1 early in the drive at midfield where Choice picks up a big chunk of yards. Converting short yardage situations is a GOOD thing, who knew!

Drive #4 -

GT gets a first down (notice how many drives started this way, we were moving the football). On 2nd and 1 we have an incomplete pass. On 3rd and 1 we bring in Grant and lose 3 yards and punt. Huge blown opportunity here as the ball was near midfield and we had ND on their heels a bit. Having two cracks from 1 yard and getting nothing is just killer.

Drive #5 -

Field Goal. Drive was kept alive by a 3rd and 1 conversion by Choice near midfield.

Drive #6 -

Ball picked up a first down on a run, but then we got a grand total of nothing after that and punter. No short yardage situations on this drive.

Drive #7 -

2 first downs get us to midfield and then Choice gets stuffed on a 3rd and 1 on the ND side of the field. Huge blow here, we had a chance to get back momentum and pick up a score and got stoned. This is the 3rd just backbreaking failure to pick up 1 yard conversion.

Drive #8 -

The Calvin reviewed incompletion. It was on 3rd and 5, nothing else really going on this possession. This was the only 3 and out of the entire game for GT. That's it.

Drive #9 -

Bad shotgun snap at midfield dooms this drive after moving the football successfully to this point. This was the final time GT had the ball in the game.

So, to sum it up? GT had the football 9 times. We scored on 2 of those drives, and in both cases converted 1 yard opportunities for 1st downs. In 3 other cases GT simply had to gain 1 yard to keep a drive alive and failed. In all 3 of those drives, GT had been moving the football and was in good field position. If we convert and go on to score on any of those drives, this is a completely different ball game - one GT probably wins.

It is inexcusable with an offensive line as good as Tech's, a mobile QB and an experienced back like Choice behind a blocker like Cox for a team to not convert the vast majority of short yardage situations. Tech was just disastrous, only converting 2 of the 5 drives that had these situations. This has got to get fixed.

Also, quite frankly, the offense played pretty well. Ball had a solid game, and if he can give GT a 50% completion rate, no interceptions and 50+ yards rushing every game out - the Jackets are going to win a lot of ball games. That being said, all the offensive success in the world is pointless if you can't convert those final 3 feet. That's where GT lost the game.

Notre Dame Post Mortem

2006-09-04T09:19:00.000-07:00

First off, the NYC alumni group is a great crowd and I had a blast getting to watch the game with fellow Tech fans (and a prof). I got to sing I'm a Ramblin Wreck at the top of my lungs for the first time in a while, that made it all worth it.

I thought it was a great game, and I thought Tech played very well - and looked very well coached. It's not all sunshine and roses, but there was a heck of a lot of good in the game to work off for the rest of the season. For that reason, I'll break this up into two parts - the "good" part, and the "bad" part.

The "Good":

#1 - The crowd, College Gameday and the national attention all weekend. What a tremendous showcase for a football program, overselling the stadium and the "bigtime" atmosphere that accompanied everything. The crowd was flatout nuts on TV, I can't remember a crowd like except for UGa games. You couldn't have asked for a better recruiting tool (for both players and fans) that what went on in Atlanta this weekend. Down to the final whistle, this was all good for Tech. And oh yeah - Calvin has been defeating Catholics since 1509.

#2 - The defense, and especially the young secondary. Yeah, the defensive line is frigging monsters, but we already knew that. We knew DRich (how good was it to watch him bulldozing through and then chasing Quinn around?) and Anoai were going to wreck people, and that Wheeler and K-Mike were big time behind them - but we didn't know what on earth the secondary would do. They made some young mistakes, but for the most part they played terrific. Pat Clark, in particular, looked pretty darn good in coverage, and he made a HUGE hit on Darius Walker that didn't look anything like a converted WR. Our secondary looked athletic and they tackled great, my biggest fear for the season seems unrealized.

#3 - Reggie. The playcalling was more bland than a bowl of cafeteria oatmeal, but Reggie showed off a strong arm and made good decisions with the football. He also ran the ball effectively out of the shotgun, something we hadn't seen before this year in large doses. Almost all his throws were still to the perimeter of the field, but he did a much better job of hitting Calvin in stride when the chance presented itself and I thought he made pretty solid decisions all night long. Reggie is never going to be a superstar, but if he can be a 50-55% passer and not throw INT's, we're going to win a lot of games. He did that Saturday night.

#4 - Special Teams are 1251934867% better than last year. We had a kickoff go into the endzone! We didn't give up huge punt returns!! We made a field goal!!! Yeah, kickoff coverage still sucks, but that's it to take away from the game. After last year's "special" teams unit that rode the shortbus to the game, Saturday was a breath of fresh air.

#5 - We held Notre Dame and their high flying offense and "sooper genius" coach to 14 points. 14. Brady Quinn in the first half looked like a boxer going into the 7th round after taking shot after shot, and his happy feet didn't stop for the whole game. That was an absolute clinic on how to disrupt an offense's timing and rythm. Tenuta's worth every single penny he's paid.

#6 - It goes without saying, but Calvin Johnson is ridiculous.

The "Bad":

#1 - The playcalling still leaves something to be desired. I understand playing conservatively, letting your defense win the game and trying not to screw it up for them - but we've taken it to a new extreme. GT's offense literally never takes a chance, on anything. Even with the biggest freak this side of the sword swallowing fat lady trapeze artist in the circus, we still almost never try to stretch the field. More vexing to me though was the bizarre short yardage plays we saw a couple of times which got stuffed and ended up forcing punts. We've got to keep our offense on the field more than we did in the second half, as tremendous as that defense is, they've got to get a break now and then. If we want to win 9 games instead of 7, we're going to have to open the playbook just a tiny bit more.

#2 - Keying off of #1, I was dissapointed in our running game. We couldn't convert short yardage situations (with our o-line and Cox in the backfield, that shouldn't be a problem) and it just seemed to be a bizarre mishmash of blocking schemes and playcalling. I love watching the spread offense, but when it's truly successful it entails a great running game. Right now, we look worse running the ball than we did last year - and that needs to get fixed. Our inability to convert 3rd downs cost us this game, and we can't keep having that.

On 2-1 - 1 for 4
On 3-1 - 2 for 4
On 4-1 - 0 for 1

Yeah, that's broken. No reason we can't just line up and push people 1 yard off the ball. We lost the game right here.

#3 - Throwing the water bottle at the ref. Seriously, that's freaking bush league "georgia fan" type stuff. Hopefully whoever that is got kicked out immediately. That has no place at a Tech game.

#4 - The personal foul call that kept ND's second drive alive. There is no "helmet to helmet" rule in college football, and that type of hit happens on nearly every running play. Wheeler didn't lead with his helmet in a spearing manner, and Quinn had both feet in bounds and was trying to fight for the first down. It was a clean play, and should have forced ND into a FG attempt right there. Just a terrible call.

#5 - Linebacker depth still worries me a bit, our first 3 are awesome, but I don't know about anything after that. They looked worn down a bit (K-Mike missed two tackles he normally makes in his sleep) and we've got to get them some help as the season goes along.

All in all, I came away more impressed with ND than with anything else from this game. I didn't think they could win a game where someone came out and just punched them straight in the mouth and physically dominated them. When Anoai went WWF on Quinn and flying boddy slammed him to the turf, I thought we had a real good shot to win. To ND's credit, they came back from 10-0 in an incredibly hostile environment against a top 10 defense and stole a game away. National Championship teams have to be able to do that. We're not quite at that level yet. We are nearly there talent wise (tell me with a straight face there's a huge difference between ND and GT right now on the talent scale), but coaching, experience and just plain swagger we don't have at that level. Hopefully that's something we can learn over the course of the next two years. I think we'll go 9-3 or 8-4 this year and contend for the Coastal division title, and if CJ stays for his senior year this team is shaping up to be a big time national force. There's plenty to work on, but we're a far cry from 51-7 just a few years ago. ND will get my vote for #1 in the next blogpoll outside of FSU or Miami just blowing the other one out, I think they proved a lot to me Saturday night. That will be one of their 2-3 toughest games of the year in the end.

(pictures from the always excellent Jeff Gooley)

The "other" Manhattan

2006-08-18T23:58:00.000-07:00

Forget speaches about burning ships and canibals. Forget running off 3 of your 5 scholarship QB's within a single offseason. Forget the new coach who's never seen a camera he won't talk too. Forget recruiting every 5'8" 150lb running back in the entire midwest. The most embarassing thing to come out of Manhattan, KS is [THIS] abomination.

"Yeah, Willie's gonna make it happen!"

The Only Analysis That Matters - SEC Part #2

2006-08-16T17:46:00.000-07:00

As promised, here's the rest of the SEC rankings - which will complete all the major conferences. I'll do a wrap up with some independant and small conference mascot in addition to announcing the conference OMG WINNAR!!111! in a soon to come final column on this subject.

Louisiana State Tiger

Strengths: He's a tiger. A fully grown tiger with fangs and all. The current "Mike" is only the fifth tiger that has represented LSU since 1936, which is very impressive when you think of it - they take good care of their tigers down in the bayou. Mike stalking in his enclosure on a sweaty deep black night in front of 90,000 drunken crazy cajuns in Death Valley is one of the premiere home field experiences in all of college football. Nobody other than cajuns would have a live 500lb+ predator on the sideline, but for some reason it seems a natural fit with LSU.

Weaknesses: None. Even the generic "Tigers" is excusable when you are named after a Civil War unit from New Orleans that wore uniforms like [this].

Rating: Not even possible of sucking. Mike the Tiger is the best mascot in all of college football.

Ole Miss Rebel

Strengths: Well, there isn't a mascot since Colonel Reb was banned from sporting events by the school. (you can read the whole saga [here])

Weaknesses: When you have 40,000 people qualified to vote for a new mascot and only 2,400 actually do ... either nobody cares, or you have terrible choices like [this] and [this].

Rating: Sucks beyond belief. Get with the program Ole Miss, with some of the best looking women on the planet - just get one in her Sunday best and make her the mascot. That would instantly vault you up the list.

Mississippi State Bulldog

Strengths: Again, another live bulldog. While Uga gets all the attention, it's hard to remember that there's another live bulldog in the same conference - and just as cool.

Weaknesses: Bully might be an even lamer and unimaginative name than Uga.

Rating: Very cool. Starkville might not have the same renown and name recognition that Oxford and the Grove have, but it's home to the best mascot in the state, that's for sure.

South Carolina Gamecock

Strengths: Besides being the stuff of Col. Sanders dreams? It's unique, and this rating system is skewed that way. I'm not aware of another Gamecock at any level of sports, so that's gotta be going for it. Violent mascots are always preferable to placid ones as well, and birds trained to kill each other with razors strapped to their legs are cool by me.

Weaknesses: Seriously, the costume sucks. It's a big bag/skirt thing with a goofy head, and a really unoriginal name - "Cocky".

Rating: I know it won a national mascot of the year competition recently, but it still sucks. The whole hoop skirt thing went out in the '80's. The 1880's. Cockabooses though? Those don't suck.

Tennessee Hound

Strengths: Since there's two bulldogs in the SEC alone, a bluetick hound gets the nod as the most unique live dog mascot I know of. "Smokey" makes a splendid sight in his checkered blanket and with his loud and dinstinctive howl is one of the reasons why gameday in Neyland is such a treat.

Weaknesses: Is surrounded by people from Tennessee, which frankly isn't the poor dogs fault.

Rating: Great mascot. A bit light on tradition compared to one like Mike the Tiger, but still in the upper tier of college mascots.

Vanderbilt Commodore

Strengths: Commodores is a cool name!

Weaknesses: Everything about this abortion of a costume from the creepy oversized head to the wierd angle the hat is at and the gloves and tuxedo pants that look like sweats. The "oversized head on a human body" mascot costume style is the one we dislike the most, and this is one of the worst offenders.

Rating: Unlike the school, this mascot really sucks.

Blogpoll, It's Back and Better Than Ever!

2006-08-14T18:16:00.000-07:00

Brian over at mgoblog did a fantastic job with the Blogpoll last year, and this year he's done yeoman's work in revamping the interface and adding features making it easier on us voters to, you know ... vote. What hasn't changed though is that crazy homerific bloggers with strong regional preferences are picking the top 25. Suprisingly, this makes us only half as biased as the professional sportswriters and coaches who contribute to the "real" polls.

So without further ado, here's my first ballot of the season. It's not due to be finalized until Wednesday - so if you think I'm a complete moron putting Navy and Arkansas in the top 25, feel free to tell me so, I'm willing to consider anyone for 20-25.

Rank	Team	Delta
1	Texas	25
2	Ohio State	24
3	Southern Cal	23
4	Auburn	22
5	Notre Dame	21
6	Louisiana State	20
7	Florida	19
8	Florida State	18
9	Cal	17
10	West Virginia	16
11	Louisville	15
12	Miami (Florida)	14
13	Oklahoma	13
14	Virginia Tech	12
15	Clemson	11
16	Iowa	10
17	Penn State	9
18	Oregon	8
19	Michigan	7
20	Arizona State	6
21	Georgia	5
22	Boston College	4
23	Georgia Tech	3
24	Navy	2
25	Arkansas	1

Dropped Out:

It's the Awesomeist!

2006-08-13T17:17:00.000-07:00

Tell me you can watch this and resist not immediately sending an application letter in to Clemson:

There has to be a wiley Gamecock fan behind this - to whoever you are, well done.

The Only Analysis That Matters - SEC Part #1

2006-08-11T16:48:00.000-07:00

Yikes. Don't ever move to NYC from half way across the country under the following circumstances: You don't know anyone in the city to help you, your wife is out of the country and unable to assist, and you have exactly two days between the end of your job in KC and the start of your job in NYC. Trust me on this. Did I mention finding an apartment within walking distance of Columbia that isn't a student dump and/or isn't in the hood? When the first thing every broker says as you approach an apartment is "this area has become quite gentrified in the past couple of years, don't believe what you've heard about it" ... be afraid. Very afraid.

So anyways, I'm back blogging again. Thankfully all the havoc in my personal life happened during the summer, so I didn't really miss anything with my absence from the internet (withdrawl shakes not withstanding). Practice has started, guys are fighting and there's already a debate raging in Tech circles on how well the new offense is going to work and how well Reggie fits with it. My position? It can't be worse, so bring it on. The House Rock Built will have a piece I did for them previewing Tech and answering some offbeat questions about the school - you can check that out for more Tech related football stuff here in the near future.

Most importantly though, here's the long awaited first half of the SEC mascot review ... you wouldn't believe the amount of mail in my inbox about this. Seriously, I can't even comment on EDSBS.com without someone bringing it up. So, without futher ado ... here we go.

Alabama Elephant

Strengths: Well, he's an elephant, and that's pretty cool. Certainly unique as well. "Big Al" is a great name, and while the mascot costume is a bit cutie fruitie - it's also one that's certainly fun and family friendly.

Weaknesses: That trunk is pretty flimsy looking - seriously, it looks like a sock hung over one of those red plastic Solo cups on his face, and overall it's a bit too cute for my tastes

Rating: Doesn't suck

Arkansas Razorback

Strengths: I'll let this piece speak for itself, I can't sum it up any better

The live mascot tradition dates back to the 1960s. A number of hogs have proudly represented Arkansas through the years. In addition to their presence on the sidelines, some also gained a reputation for their activities off the field.

Big Red III, for instance, escaped from an animal exhibit near Eureka Springs in the summer of 1977 and ravaged the countryside before an irate farmer gunned him down. And Ragnar, a wild hog captured in south Arkansas by Leola farmer Bill Robinson, killed a coyote, a 450-pound domestic pig and seven rattlesnakes. Ragnar died in 1978 of unknown causes.

So um, yeah, Razorbacks are pretty badass. I'm trying to think of another school's mascot who had to be gunned down after leaving a swath of destruction and coming up with nothing.

Weaknesses: Arkansas can't leave well enough alone, and not only has a family of costumed mascots but also one of those gawdawful inflatable ones.

Rating: Doesn't suck, solely on the strength of the live one. The wretched costumed family (wtf - "pork chop" the kid?) and the even worse inflatable one nearly torpedoed this ranking, but the thought of a big raging pig on the warpath in the Arkansas countryside is too good to be ruined by those.

Auburn Tiger

Strengths: Had his tail ripped off by crazy GT freshman - "RATS on the field!" in his first appearance in Atlanta. While Aubie doesn't have much excitement in the costume or nickname, his antics and routine are pretty cool. Aubie has been nominated for the mascot hall of fame, as a member of the spirit squad he does a very good job.

Weaknesses: Pretty generic tiger costume. When you've got a common "every high school" mascot, you need a sweet costume (or live mascot) to push you over the top. Aubie doesn't bring that. I love Calvin and Hobbes, but I'm not sure I want a crazy kid's imaginary tiger as my mascot.

Rating: There would be no question about this if the eagles were in the rating (one of the best pregames in all of college football). Unfortunately, the school is very clear that the eagles are NOT the mascot ... and thus poor Aubie gets a suck rating.

Florida Gator

Strengths: Was the star character in one of the 5 best "This is SportsCenter" ads of all time. Again, much like "Big Al", "Albert" is a unique mascot with a cool name. The costume looks sort of like a giant stuffed animal, but when you are trying to make a costume out of an animal with 18" tall legs you get a bit of a pass if it looks a tiny bit goofy.

Weaknesses: Again, a bit too cutsie for me - and "Alberta"? The whole family of mascots things has to go, this is a trend that is threating college football all over the country and needs to be nipped in the bud.

Rating: Doesn't suck - though this would be clinched if "Albert" showed up to a game wearing a pair of jorts.

Georgia Bulldog

Strengths: Man, it kills me to say this but I like Uga. He's got tons of character, he waddles around like he owns the place (which he basically does) and he attacked an Auburn WR who had the audacity to score in his end zone. I'm a sucker for dogs and for live mascots, Uga is both of them.

Weaknesses: Uga is the best they could come up with for a name? Of course, this is Georgia we are talking about - so I guess they had to choose something easy to both remember and spell. Also, Uga has to share time with the horrendous "Hairy Dawg" costume, which should be burned. One of the worst costumes in college athletics. Uga is also responsible for legions of rednecks "barking" at each other in the state of Georgia, which is a crime against humanity.

Rating: Hairy Dawg sucks, sucks, sucks. Uga doesn't.

Kentucky Wildcat

Strengths: Um, the school logo with the wildcat is cool?

Weaknesses: This costume is straight from the corner costume store generic "wildcat, tiger, bearcat, puma, leopard" rack. This is beyond generic, he doesn't even have a name.

Rating: Sucks. A lot.

Part 2 of the SEC will be later this weekend, and then we'll unveil the best conference in America winner - and it's not like our criteria are any worse than whatever 90% of the writers in sports pages around the country are using right now.

I'm not dead, I swear!

2006-07-27T11:20:00.000-07:00

Thanks for 30 e-mails and comments I've received about where on earth I've gone - and no, I'm not dead and I haven't quit blogging ... I'm just in New York and getting moved in / internet /computer / new job / etc. is a big fat pain in the neck and enormously time consuming.

Anyways, the SEC mascot should be here shortly I promise (yeah, you've heard that one before) - and yes, I have a soft spot for Uga. I'm pretty sure I'm going to Tech hell for that one, but I love dogs and can't help it. Of course, that means I'll probably just skip him and rate "Hairy Dog" instead (who's absolutely terrible), so my soul will still be clean.

Where on Earth are the Posts?

2006-07-12T13:34:00.000-07:00

I'm in the middle of moving from Kansas to New York City (long story) and have very limited internet availability, if any at all. I apologize for the lack of updates on the site - ESPECIALLY THE SEC MASCOTS (yes, thanks for the 25 e-mails on this topic).

Golden Tornado will be back to a semi-regular posting schedule next week.

Portland Has a #1 PG

2006-06-28T15:06:00.000-07:00

Portland has officially traded Sebastian Telfair for the Boston Celtic's 1st round pick tonight (#7 overall) and Dan Dickau. This trade means that Portland and Nate McMillan feel that Jack is the PG of the future for them, and he will enter next year as the primary option in the backcourt for them. Along with Martell Webster he will form one of the larger and more physical backcourts in the NBA, and should fit well with McMillan's style of basketball. Congratulations to Jarrett.

The Only Analysis That Matters - Part 5

2006-06-28T12:24:00.000-07:00

If this is new to you, read [here], [here], [here] and [here] ... it won't make sense (nothing on this blog ever does), but at least you'll get a feel for what on earth is going on here. With that as the backdrop then, lets dive straight into the wild, wild west and examine the mascot worthiness of the PAC-10.

Arizona Wildcat

Strengths: My uncle is a U of A graduate, and still lives in Tuscon (which is a beautiful town with Mt. Lemmon right outside, etc). Outside of the family ties ... not much to go on here.

Weaknesses: The stuffed mascot exists because they killed the live one by leaving it tied to a tree where it fell and hung itself. Good work there. On that fact alone they deserve a "suck" rating, but it gets worse. Having a wildcat for a mascot in the first place? Lame. Naming your mascot "Wilbur" and then having it get married to "Wilma"? Lame. Big baggy costume that is pretty much interchangeable with any of 6 other mascots we've ranked so far? Lame.

Rating: It's probably karma from killing off the original (and very not suck) live mascot, but Wilbur and Wilma suck.

Arizona State Sun Devil

Strengths: He's a flaming devil, and following the basic rule of "if it's evil it's always cooler" that earns bonus points. The fact that the original flaming imp Sun Devil logo was supposedly drawn to resemble Walt Disney because the artist had been fired by him certainly has to add to it's cache.

Weaknesses: Pretty weak costume here, just a head and what looks like some extra padded sweatpants with flames on them. "Sparky" isn't the strongest name either, but nothing here is really too big of a violation of the mascot suck standards.

Rating: Pretty cool, and certainly doesn't suck.

California Bear

Strengths: It's a hippy mascot for a hippy campus, with sort of a dorky "cool" that fits Berkeley. Also, as the flagship university of the state of California, it's fitting for the bear to be used since it is such a longstanding image of the state. "Oski" is a pretty cool name as well, derived from a turn of the century cheer.

Weaknesses: Oski wears jeans. No mascot should wear jeans, ever. He's also got a permanently dopey look (much like many students at Berkeley come to think of it) that makes you think he's been dipping in the chemistry lab's stock on a regular basis.

Rating: Sucks. This is a tough one, because if I went to Cal I'd probably love Oski for being quirky and different - and normally in these ratings quirky and different has been held up as not sucking. But jeans and that dopey look? That's something only an alumni could love.

Oregon Duck

Strengths: It's a green version of Donald Duck.

Weaknesses: It doesn't just look like Donald Duck, it IS Donald Duck. Really going out on a limb there (what's with the PAC-10 and Walt Disney by the way?). Worse, Nike recently sponsored a newer mascot costume that looks like Roboduck and is worse than the football uniforms.

Rating: Sucks. Get your own mascot and logo, don't leech off of an American icon.

Oregon State Beaver

Strengths: It's better than the other mascots in OSU's bizarre mascot history. A coyote? A bulldog? Some guy who used to throw his hat in a river? The beaver is better than all of those combined.

Weaknesses: There used to be a married couple of mascots (Benny and Bernice) but that has thankfully been done away with. Also, the current mascot costume has only been in use since 1999, when the older "cuter" costume was put to rest. Any time your new mascot is referred to as the "Angry" one because it's looks edgier ... that's not good. Stop playing with tradition.

Rating: Sucks for getting rid of the old cute one that sort of looked like the Minnesota gopher. That one didn't suck.

Stanford Tree

Strengths: Uniqueness has been rewarded to this point - and the tree is unique, there's no doubt about that. The tradition of each student making their own tree costume lends itself to all sorts of interpretation, and while some are just awful ... some others are really good. Also, the tree recently was cited for public intoxication while performing at a basketball game. Wearing a giant costume and having to put up with pawing children would drive us to drink as well, so we fully understand.

Weaknesses: Well, it's a freaking tree for one - and some people just can't get over that fact. Also, some trees have made terrible costumes for themselves, which we simply cannot defend.

Rating: Doesn't suck. I love the unique tradition of making your own costume, I love the randomness of picking a tree as a mascot to begin with and I love the goofball looking costumes that come out each year. I know a lot of readers won't agree with this one, but tough luck - on our rating scale, the tree doesn't suck at all.

UCLA Bruins

Strengths: They're bears, and the general bears in California rule that applied to the Oski also applies here.

Weaknesses: Can we please stop with the couples mascots? Is this something endemic to the west coast? The costumes are too cute, the whole "couple" thing is too cute, everything is just sugary and cute about the Bruins. Combined with gold and light blue uniforms ... lets just say it isn't exactly the sort of thing that brings football to mind. I know it's L.A and sunny southern California and things just aren't the same there ... but come on.

Rating: Sucks.

USC Trojan on Horseback

Strengths: Hangs out with the Trojan cheerleaders and their ridiculous sweaters. That alone makes him the coolest mascot out there in our opinion. The mascot is actually the horse, named Traveler - which means there's big white horse rounding the stadium with a fully dressed Trojan on his back? Sign us up right now. Throw in the fact that Traveler's first game was the home opener against Georgia Tech in 1961 (remember, GT used to be a huge name ... throw us in the wayback machine and we're in love) and it's tough to top.

Weaknesses: None. Along with Renegade at Florida State, Mike the tiger at LSU, Ralphie at Colorado and maybe a select couple of others, this is one of the best mascots in college athletics.

Rating: Incapable of sucking.

Washington Husky

Strengths: Washington has had a live husky or malamute on the sidelines since the 1920's, and despite the recent addition of a costumed mascot (who most certainly sucks), the dog continues to be the star of the show. We love live mascots, and Prince Redoubt is a gorgeous dog.

Weaknesses: Has to share the stage with this terrible excuse for a costume.

Rating: Doesn't suck.

Washington State Cougar

Strengths: Long standing tradition of live cougars as mascots was finally ended in 1978 in Pullman, and while we love live mascots - keeping a live predator as a safe mascot at sporting events has to be tough, so I understand the move to a costume. "Butch" is pretty safe as mascots go, nothing edgy or too exciting, but nothing terrible either.

Weaknesses: It's a "safe" costume ... aka "boring". It's pretty generic, and without the very cool WSU logo on it could be mistaken for any number of regional high schools or small colleges with big cat mascots.

Rating: Doesn't suck, but not particularly memorable either.

So the Pac-10 registers a respectable 50% suck percentage, bouyed by a couple of unique and/or live mascots and without any true stinkers like some of the other conferences have had. All in all, a showing that would make our friends over at Heisman Pundit happy, but they are unfortunately unable to overcome the lead that the Big XII has built. It's up to the SEC to try and topple them next.

The Great Ones

2006-06-27T17:19:00.000-07:00

Zinedine Zidane and Ronaldo are the two greatest soccer players of my generation, guys who made the remarkable normal and each one capable of taking a team on their back and winning the biggest of competitions. Both had a definitive moment in a World Cup final where they basically willed their teams to win (Ronaldo in '02, Zidane in '98) and won countless times in their domestic leagues. They are older now, and certainly not as good as they used to be, but both today showed they still have flashes left in them as they are on their way out - it was great to watch them shine for what might be the last time on the world stage. They are the only two men to ever win three seperate FIFA World Player of the Year awards and are always going to be tied together in my memory.

It's hard to remember now, nearly 10-12 years later, the young explosive Ronaldo, the one with the speed, balance and power combination that would have made him one of the greatest running backs of all time if he had grown up in the United States. In the mid-90's with Barcelona and Inter Milan, he was the best player on the planet and maybe the best pure goal scorer who had ever lived. He would emberass multiple defenders with a bewildering array of moves, and had that heartless finishing ability that never left a chance wanting. 47 goals in 49 games in his last campaign with Barcelona is simply remarkable, a testament to his unwavering nose for the goal. As he has aged (and put on quite a bit of weight) that pure explosive speed that always seems to remind me of Gale Sayers has left him, but the quick feet and eyes in the back of his head for oncoming defenders is still there. Watching today's goal where he deftly stepped around the keeper and slotted it home with the opposite foot he made the move with was vintage Ronaldo - you could almost see him at his prime in a Barca shirt leaving the keeper sprawling in the dust without the ball in sight. Ronaldo was O Fenômeno (The Phenomenom) at 17, and it hasn't quite faded out yet.

Zidane, the one who looked like he was 40 at 20 because of the bald pate and the ever present 5 o'clock shadow. The one who held the keys to the engine of France's golden generation and brought the first ever Cup home to Paris after a scintilating performance in the '98 final where the distributor took on a new role putting two balls in the net to secure the title for France. If Ronaldo would have been a running back, Zidane would have been a quarterback - with the awareness to always hold off the defense around him while picking out his teammates with pinpoint accuracy. Zidane's teams always won, that was a common theme. Players made entire careers out of finishing chances generated out of the midfield by him - and then when it was needed most he could come up huge himself (the full volley winner in the '02 Champion's League Final was just ridiculous). Zidane is possibly the most clutch athlete I have ever seen in any sport, he was just spectacular on the largest of stages. Watching him today running the French attack and holding off his retirement for at least one more match, including scoring a terrific goal in stoppage time was vintage.

Enough soccer, I promise - the PAC-10 mascot rankings tommorow!

Albiceleste!

2006-06-26T11:30:00.000-07:00

Two things have slowed down the posting regularity here on Golden Tornado - a move in progress to NYC and the fact I've been glued to the TV watching the World Cup. A number of better college football bloggers than myself have been providing commentary on the spectacle in Germany, but after this weekend's terrific Argentina v. Mexico matchup in the first knockout round of the tournament I've finally got to add my piece.

I'll preface my comments by admiting I'm an Argentina fan, dating to my college days when a suitemate was an Argentinian national and got me watching every one of their matches (including the epic England showdown) in the '98 Cup. After the disaster that was the '02 Cup for the light blues, this year's team has a lot to prove and a number of young stars looking to make their mark after the generation of Veron and Batistuta has finally moved (or in Veron's case - shoved) on.

What makes college football special to me is the passion and the pageantry, the rabid fans and the uniqueness of each game's atmostphere. In many ways, soccer mirrors this. College football is strongly regional, with many of the residents of each state identifying more with the football team bearing the same name than with anything else. There's a sense of community and "ownership" that all but the smallest of professional teams seems incapable of duplicating. When you think about it, most of the nations in the World Cup are of similar size to US states (Texas has 20 million people, the Netherlands has 16 million) and the deep rooted identification with the local team lends to the same type of passion and energy in the fans and the games. Add in strong nationalistic feelings in many of those countries and give them an excuse to wave flags and get hammered and you have one heck of a loud, exciting and sometimes rowdy crowd.

As the Mexico v. Argentina match drew on towards the end of regulation tied 1-1, you could feel the pulse of the stadium through the TV, and see it on the faces of the players. Many on both sides were completely spent, but they were still playing at an exceptional level. As overtime began, you knew that people around the world were glued to their TV's regardless of rooting interest just enjoying the performance being put on. When Maxi Rodriguez thundered home a goal on a supreme individual effort in the 98th minute it was the only fitting way to end one of the best matches of the past several Cups, anything less would have cheated everyone involved.

Make no mistake, in the grand scheme of sport - that was a tremendous goal. I'm sure thousands of words will be written about it far more eloquently than what I can say (most of them in Spanish), but for the stage and setting you will be hard pressed to find a better performance. It was overtime of a knockout match in the World Cup, an event that only comes along every four years, and involved two soccer mad countries who's national worth is in some ways measured by the performance of their teams in this tournament. Add to it the technical dificulty and asthetic beauty of the strike, and you have a permanent member of every highlight reel for the next decade.

Even if you're not a soccer fan, the chances are that if you are reading this blog you are a fan of sports in general. You owe it to yourself to at least give the Cup a shot - while the rules, players and teams might not be known to you,the passion, pageantry and the pure enjoyment of world class athletes performing on the biggest stage shouldn't be.

Snapshots of Omaha

2006-06-19T08:48:00.000-07:00

I haven't had time to finish my full commentary on my trip to Omaha, but here's a few pictures to try and capture the feel of the event. For those of you who have never gone, it's a terrific sporting event - one of the best I've ever been to. My wife and I had an absolute blast, and will certainly be back (click on the pictures for larger versions).

View from our seats in the right field bleachers in the first game

The infamous "Pauli's" at night

View from the press box at Nebraska's Memorial Stadium (side trip on Saturday)

Going to Omaha?

2006-06-14T12:36:00.000-07:00

If you are going to be in Omaha this weekend for the opening games on Friday and Sunday - shoot me an e-mail or if you have a facebook account you can send me a message here. I'm going to try and say high to some folks and have a blast for the weekend. I've never been to the CWS, and it's only a 2.5 hour drive from me now - I have no excuse not to be there.

The Only Analysis That Matters - Part 4

2006-06-14T07:19:00.000-07:00

(EDIT 6/19/06 - Thank you Kansas State fans for your profane tirades, it's obvious that any attempt at humor completey skipped the Little Apple. I've deleted several comments that were way out of line for this blog and will continue to do so. There's an e-mail link at the bottom of the page, you can flame me with that if you absolutely have the need too).

This whole College World Series business and then that World Cup thingy sort of interfered with the important task or rating mascots, and for that I apologize. So after a several day hiatus, we're back with the Big XII and it's collection of live animals roaming the sidelines. Something about the wideopen spaces of the midwest must cater to having a 2000 lb. live animal wreaking havoc on opposing marching bands - but we're not going to complain. If you just stumbled into this, the introduction and ACC are [HERE], the Big East is [HERE] and the Big 10 is [HERE]. Without futher ado - on to the Big XII.

Baylor Bears

Strengths: They could rip your head off? The fact that the Baylor bears (there are several at any point in time) are all named "Judge" after one of the long term mascots in the '60s is a neat tradition as well. Baylor really supports the bear program, there's an entire staff at the school dedicated to the bears, and they each have their own individual Bear Trainer.

Weaknesses: None. They are real live bears, claws and all.

Rating: Baylor gets the Big XII off to a great start without a hint of suck.

Colorado Buffalo

Strengths: It's a huge full grown buffalo, the symbol of the American west and possibly the largest mascot in all of college sports. When Ralphie comes running out before the games, you can be darn sure nobody is trying to get in her way.

Weaknesses: They didn't know it was a male or female for a while (at that size, it's not like you need a microscope to figure it out) - but that's not Ralphie's fault.

Rating: No suck in sight, simply one of the best mascots in college sports.

Iowa State Cyclone

Strengths: Pretty much nothing - though I guess the costume is baggy enough it could be a good sleeping bag if neccessary.

Weakness: There's no shape to the costume, it's just a fuzzy red bag. The head looks bad, and the mesh grill in between the beak is lame (yes, we know the human inside has to see - just don't keep reminding us of it with the costume design). Of all the "dressed up human" type costumes, this is one of the worst. Oh yeah, it has nothing to do with "Cyclones" either. Miami couldn't make a hurricane costume, but they still got something somewhat related. CARDINALS HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH CYCLONES.

Rating: Sucks, sucks, sucks. Still not even the worst mascot in the conference though.

Kansas Jayhawk

Strengths: Extremely unique and with a strong historic background. The Civil War began on the Kansas / Missouri border in the late 1850's, and the free state ruffians from Kansas were named "jayhawkers". While the actual bird is an early 20th century creation and has gone through several variations, the roots are very much from the Civil War era (Lawrence was burned and sacked and massacred by Missouri raiders - there's a reason the rivalry is so bitter).

Weaknesses: Some say it looks a bit like a Toucan or some other common cartoon birds. This is pretty weaksauce as complaints go.

Rating: Unique with Civil War roots? No suck here.

Kansas State Wildcat

Strengths: It's just a head, so you can be a basketball player, a football player or even ride a Harley with ease.

Weaknesses: Everything. This is the worst mascot in all of college sports. It's just a head, which is lame in and of itself. The "Powercat" logo that it's derived from is recent, and was a dead copy by coach Snyder of the Iowa Hawkeye logo (where he had been previously). Oh yeah, "Wildcat"? Which local high school did that come from?

Rating: It's purple. It's unoriginal. It's a lame generic nickname. The mascot's name "Willie" isn't even unique (Northwestern's has the same name). AND IT'S ONLY A HEAD. Quite simply, the worst mascot in major Division 1 sports.

Missouri Tiger

Strengths: "Truman" is named for President Truman, a Missouri native and the nickname comes from another Civil War era unit (similar to the Jayhawks) and dates from around 1890 - so I can't be too harsh on the generic nickname and mascot choice.

Weaknesses: The costume is way too cartoony if you are going with the "ferocious wild animal" theme, and there's is no excuse to ever be photographed pulling a Travolta from Saturday Night Fever.

Rating: Sucks. There's only one school that pulls off "Tigers" well, and this isn't the one.

Nebraska Cornhusker

Strengths: Looks like a farmer husking corn (at least the regular one - the inflatable one is just downright frightening).

Weaknesses: Just a boring and generic mascot, it's a guy wearing a red costume. Quite honestly, with the simple and elegant "N" helmets and classic red and white uniforms - shouldn't NU just go with the Michigan or Indiana model and skip having a mascot? Unfortunately, NU has gone for not one but two mascots, and neither are anything exciting.

Rating: Sucks. Nebraska might just be better off without a mascot at all.

Oklahoma Sooner Schooner

Strengths: Pretty funny that a school coached by Switzer and on the NCAA's permanent watch list is nicknamed after a bunch of cheaters - it's quite fitting. The actual Sooner Schooner rumbling around the field is certainly different from anything else in college sports (closest thing I can think of is GT's Ramblin' Wreck). While it's not a true "mascot" it works for the purposes of this competition.

Weaknesses: At it's core it's a wagon that dragged families around, which couldn't have been that exciting.

Rating: Doesn't suck - I love the tradition.

Oklahoma State Cowboy

Strengths: "Pistol Pete" is named in honor of former US Marshall Frank Eaton, who was a guy you'd rather have on your side than against you. Back when the law was more of a moving target in that part of the country, he was the law:

Frank then set out on the trail of his father's killers. First was Shannon Campsey, Frank killed him on his own front porch. Doc Ferber was next, he was shot off of his horse with "two forty-five slugs through his breast". John Ferber would have been next, but the day before Frank caught up with him, he was shot for cheating at cards. Frank went to his funeral just to make sure he was dead. At John Ferber's funeral, Frank met a Deputy United States Marshal who was on the trail of the same men. After talking about the men, Frank was offered, and accepted a commission.

The costume itself is pretty gritty, and the unshaven whiskers are a nice touch and you can sort of smell the whiskey on the mascot's breath just looking at it. Oh yeah, Golden Tornado got our photos next to the official Pistol Pete statue with (surprisingly similar to the mascot) Eddie Sutton himself, so that's got to count for something.

Weaknesses: It's really just a plastic head on a human body, but the costume is so solid the rest of the way around we're cutting it some slack.

Rating: We're afraid if we gave it a grade of "suck", Frank Eaton would come from the grave with a Winchester after us. Doesn't suck for sure!

Texas Longhorn

Strengths: Animals the size of family cars are impressive enough, but when you tack on horns wider than I am tall you get a truly great mascot. Combined one of the best logos in all of sports, the longhorn steer on the sideline is a 1-2 punch that is hard to beat.

Weakness: Can you imagine having to clean up after Bevo? That's a job that can't be popular.
Rating: No suck at all, great mascot, great tradition and great cheerleaders (had to mention those).

Texas A&M Collie

Strengths: Live mascots are always a bonus, and Reveille is a great name that fits with the tradition of the school, along with being a gorgeous dog.

Weaknesses: Did you know A&M had a live mascot? Somehow Reveille flies under the radar.

Rating: Texas A&M has one of the best fanbases and gameday experiences in the country. There is nothing associated with it that sucks, and Reveille is no different.

Texas Tech Red Raider

Strengths: Looks like Yosemite Sam, one of the more underated cartoon characters of all time. There is also an extremely cool Masked Rider that has only been at home games since 1971 because of rules surrounding live animals at away venues.

Weaknesses: This guy has an important part to play along with the mascots in gameday celebration.

Rating: Doesn't suck. We really like the Masked Rider tradition, and as far as "stuffed mascot" types go, the Red Raider costume isn't bad either.

The Big XII only has 4 mascots that suck out out 12 schools, for a very strong 33% suck ratio that vaults them clearly into first place and might prove to be insurmountable by the Pac-10 and SEC (edit - I had originally written this with only 3 mascots that sucked, and upon further review we decided that a 4th should join that list. Of course, I need an editor badly and forgot to change the percentage in the final paragraph before I posted. If you see a comment below related to this there's your explanation). The combination of clever mascots with strong history (KU and OSU) and the best collection of live animals on the sidelines in all of college football is a very strong effort by the middle of the country.

Tom Zbikowski's Bout at MSG

2006-06-11T18:01:00.000-07:00

A story of some note has been that Notre Dame's star safety Tom Zbikowski was going to fight a professional heavyweight fight in Madison Square Garden this offseason. Zbikowski has been fighting amatuer fights for some time as part of the Golden Gloves program, and obviously is a terrific athlete. The video of the (very short) fight is here - and Zbikowski just destroys his opponent in a very one sided first round, taking him from the opening bell.

Unfortunately for Zbikowski, I don't think this guy is going to prove to be such a tomato can.

OMAHA!

2006-06-10T13:32:00.000-07:00

The GT baseball team will be here ... along with the 7 other best teams in college baseball. Congratulations to a terrific season for Coach "Fire" Danny Hall and his team.

I'm going to be there with liveblogging and photos, it's a short trip from the Kansas City area. If you are going - email me from the link at the very bottom of the page. What a great weekend (and hopefully Trap isn't seriously hurt).